The newcomers ate dinner in the dining hall. It was a fairly lax day. Everyone seemed happy, but one person…
Ignacio lifted his fork to his mouth only to be hit with a pea in the eyelid. He ignored it, only to be hit in the nose as he tried to swallow. "Really?"
He glared at Vance from across the table. The cowboy held his spoon like a catapult, only having a bowl of peas in front of him. "What?"
The model rolled his eyes and tried to get another bite, only for a pea to land in his beard.
Vance snickered. "You got a little something right there partner…"
"How long do you plan to do this?" Ignacio asked.
"Depends," Vance replied. "We might have more peas in the back."
"We couldn't get a male alliance together because Ignacio sucks," Vance said. "Mr. model didn't want to vote off his old teammate. So you know who caused Weston to go home? That ***hat! After streaking to help him, that's how he repays us. Sorry deputy; you deserved better."
"Why don't you go see what Melissa's making for dessert?" Kalino suggested.
"Hmph, fine," Vance grumbled. He launched a final pea before stomping off.
"Thanks," Ignacio replied.
Kalino shrugged. "No problem dude. But he has a right to be mad, y'know? You broke a promise to us."
Ignacio sighed. "I know, I know. I really do regret it. But like I said, Ness was my teammate and a good friend-"
"-And you're hopelessly in love with her," Kalino stated.
Ignacio blushed. "...Whatttttttt? I am definitely, certainly, not-"
Kalino snorted. "Dude, come on. I should have figured it out sooner. It's super obvious in hindsight."
"Maybe I do a little," Ignacio said. "But, please don't tell her that."
"We're bros mannnn," Kalino replied. "I wouldn't do that to you. I thought you knew that…"
"I'm not used to having 'bros'," Ignacio admitted. "But you are my friend Kalino."
"Then why didn't you tell me you were uncomfortable with voting Ness?" Kalino asked. "You could've talked to me. Yet you didn't."
"It was stupid," Ignacio said. "I regret that Weston went home for it. I just...I didn't want to go against the guys' alliance. I tried to vote for Ness...but in the booth I couldn't do that. Just thinking of not seeing her here tomorrow...I hate that."
Kalino shook his head. "I understand that feeling. I really do. But are you going to throw away two mill for her? To help your family? You've risked a tiebreaker twice. Isn't that enough?"
"I-"
"You gave up a sure final five to go with an alliance of four," Kalino replied. "I'll support you if that's what you want to do Iggy. But I want you to know what you're doing."
/
Vance was in the kitchen, picking at a sundae shaped like a swan. He ate bites of it while Melissa added sprinkles.
"I'm truly sorry that Weston left," Melissa admitted.
"Is it true you ladies have teamed up?" Vance asked.
Melissa looked away. "I had to do what's best for my game. But I don't plan on voting you out anytime soon Vance, I promise."
"I know you keep you'll keep your word," Vance replied. "But...well, do you think I can ask something?"
"Of course," Melissa replied.
"If you girls are going to target another boy...I'll vote with you if it's Ignacio."
Melissa almost dropped her spoon. "Wait, really?"
"I don't want that lint licker here no more," Vance replied. "I want to be the one to send him home."
"Revenge isn't healthy," Melissa replied.
"Please Mel, I'm asking as a favor," Vance said.
Melissa sighed and forced a smile. "Okay Vance. But if you do that...promise not to tell Kalino."
Vance raised an eyebrow. "Why?"
Melissa wrung her hands together. "It's just...if he does have a flash drive like some people suspect, he may spare Iggy."
Vance sighed. "I don't think he has one, but he'd be stupid to trust that goat udder. Sometimes I wish we could just be the Molting Eagles again. I mean, what if we made the final two Melissa?"
"Are you serious?" Melissa asked.
Vance shrugged. "You know what, I am! I mean I trust you and you trust me. And them girls ain't Eagles like us."
Melissa rubbed her chin. "I will admit I am worried going to the final four with three Fizzled Fireworks."
"Wouldn't they vote you out?" Vance asked. "I mean, would Tessa or Riley ditch each other?"
Melissa shook her head and went back to stirring. "I can't think about this right now. I mean, you act like the girl's alliance is invincible. There are still four of you boys, you know?"
Vance grabbed his ice cream bowl and headed for the door. "Just think about it, okay?"
Melissa gave a guilty look at the camera. "Vance made a lot of sense and had a compelling argument. And that's very...unique and new for him. Even he's aware that we all need end plans. I feel like I'm kind of winging it. I just wanted to play this game with people I can trust and not worry are actively planning my downfall. But I guess planning everyone else's downfall is how this game is played."
The next day, Jenny went door to door and gathered some of the newcomers, instructing them to come with her for the challenge.
Tessa, Ness, Riley and Melissa followed the co-host into a seemingly new wing of the Pentagram. It was a grand casino hall, with old slot machines and dusty tables. Despite its size, it was abandoned. Half lit signs and the occasional cobweb could be found.
"How many hidden rooms does this place still have?" Tessa asked.
"It would be quite the adventure to try and find them all," Melissa said. "Except for the potential corpses you might find."
"Yeah, we had to move a lot of hidden graves before we could get this part open," Jenny replied.
Riley stopped at a slot machine and stuck a quarter in. The slots slowly turned. Gears inside screeched. They stopped and revealed her spin; 6,6,6. A human skull fell out. "Uhh...you might want to do another check."
The five stopped in the center, where Rhonda stood on a little platform stage, likely where any of the casino's entertainment would play. "Welcome to Pentagram's Devil Den! We had to fix up the place, but it should be open for business!"
Tessa looked around her. "This is fixed up?"
"And now that we've moved all the dead bodies we-"
Jenny whispered in her ear.
"...Now that we've moved most of the dead bodies," Rhonda continued. "We can use it for today's special event!"
"But where are the boys?" Ness asked.
"Toby rounded them up earlier," Rhonda replied. "For you see today's challenge is another throwback classic! Because it's not just a challenge…"
The sound of a funeral pipe organ began to echo in the casino. It played a familiar tune.
Melissa tilted her head. "Isn't this Here Comes The Bride?"
"Oh no," Tessa said, "No, don't tell me it's-"
The curtain of the stage parted, revealing Toby at said pipe organ. But more noticeable was a giant slot machine on the center stage. Muffled noises could be heard from inside it.
"It's the wedding challenge!" Rhonda announced. "I'm so sad to give you away girls."
"Really?" Tessa sighed.
"Wedding challenge?" Melissa asked.
"It was a challenge themed around getting married," Ness explained. "It took place at Niagara Falls."
"How romantic," Melissa sighed. "But whose getting married?"
"You are!" Rhonda replied.
Riley raised an eyebrow. "What a bust."
"I've never really thought about having a wedding," Riley stated. "I mean one of my brothers has had two. Just seems like a waste of so much money. And they don't even have a good spread! I guess if I ever did get married I'd just borrow my brother Pat's shirt that looks like a Tux and do it on a rollercoaster or something. I know some girls are crazy about it but I just never got it."
"I've been planning my wedding since I was five," Melissa explained. "Granted, I don't think Cinderella or Dora the Explorer would come like I thought then. But it's like a festival about celebrating your past, present and future love. How can you not fantasize about it a little? Or have a scrapbook of ideas…or several scrapbooks. I haven't finished yet of course. After all, I want it to reflect my relationship to whoever I marry. Ooh, I hope they release doves for the challenge!"
"For today's challenge you'll be competing in pairs," Rhonda explained. "Each of you will have a 'groom' who you'll share your special day with! And those grooms will be your male competitors."
"So no one in our league," Tessa teased.
"I'm guessing like the original we'll win our groom," Ness suggested. "From the giant slot machine."
"Bingo," Rhonda said. "Just pull the lever. You first Ness."
Ness blushed and walked over to it. She pulled the giant red level. The slots whirled, passing faces of Ignacio, Jasper, Kalino, and Vance. Finally, it ended and revealed her draw; one Jasper, one Vance and one Kalino.
"Does she get all three?" Melissa asked.
Ness blushed. "I don't know if I want a harem of guys. But I mean if that's what I get…"
A spring boxing glove popped from the machine, socking Ness across the room.
"That's what you get if you don't get a match," Rhonda said. "Although there's supposed to be a low chance of it."
"Of course there is," Ness sighed from the floor.
"Still preferable to some of the other choices," Tessa said.
Tessa stepped up to the machine and barely pulled the lever. "Let's get this over with."
The slot machine shook before finally spitting out her prize; Jasper.
"Ow," Jasper replied as he hit the floor.
"Tessper!" Rhonda said. "That'll make your our first returnee couple."
Jasper frowned as he dusted himself off. "Fine."
Melissa jumped forward and threw down the lever. The slots turned and turned until they lined up three grinning Kalino's. He slide right out of the hatch and flashed a peace sign. "Yo!"
Melissa held out her hand. "Looks like we're a team."
"Sweeeet," Kalino replied. "It's like we're Eagles again."
"Awww Kalissa," Rhonda said. "Nobody tell Aiden. Riley, care to find your perfect match?"
"Can we win any actual money from this?" Riley asked.
"You can only gamble your love life," Rhonda replied. "You're all under 18 after all. And we at Total Drama do not encourage underage gambling! But we do encourage legal adults to visit the Devil's Den when it officially opens and-"
Riley pulled the level, the slot machine drowning out Rhonda. It whirled. One Vance. Two Vance. It barely missed the final Vance for an Ignacio. Vance fell out of the machine in a spread out model pose. He wiggled his eyebrows. "I don't need to tell you that ya hit jackpot, do I darlin?"
Riley snickered. "Of course I have."
"Hmm...Vanley or Rincley?" Rhonda asked. "Rance? I guess we'll let fans decide. Which means that our final pair is…"
Ness spun the slot machine then immediately stepped out of the way. Naturally, it landed on Ignacio. The model sputtered out of the machine. He groaned as he fell out, his elbow lodged in the machine.
Ness came over and tried to pull him out, only to pull him on top of her. Ignacio started blushing deeply. "Ness? You mean...you and me? Partners? That's great! I mean not like that...but not, not like that! It would be great, but I've never ever you know, had thoughts like that. That sounds bad but I don't...I'm glad we're partners."
"Me too," Ness giggled. "Now, um can you get off of me please?"
"Ignesscio!" Rhonda announced. "I ship all of you already."
"You know I have a boyfriend waiting for me, right?" Riley asked.
"I can ship multiple ships," Rhonda replied.
"I've always wanted to have a big wedding actually," Jasper admitted. "To walk down that aisle and lift the veil...It just seems so special. Just to announce to the world you found somebody and celebrate that. I feel like a dork saying it out loud though…"
"I've never been to a real weddin'," Vance stated. "And I guess I still haven't cause this don't count. My ma and pa weren't. She left him and he hooked up with my stepmom, but I don't even know if they're married. He promised her he would. Maybe they did since I've been gone? Frankly, they probably deserved each other…"
"Anyhow," Rhonda said, "Let's get to the challenge. It's time to test these marriages! This challenge is race with all kinds of obstacles. The first couple to complete them all wins! To start, we have to plan a wedding before we can begin it."
Rhonda pointed to her left. "One member from each pair has to race down their to find your wedding rings. While the other pair has to go get your wedding presents from your registry!"
"Presents?" Ignacio asked.
Rhonda pointed to the right. "Yup! Some old friends have sent them. To celebrate since they can't be here. When you finish, comeback here. You'll have to wait for your partner before you can continue, so it's all about teamwork today! Now then...go!"
Ignacio, Vance, Melissa, and Tessa raced to the left while Ness, Riley, Kalino and Jasper headed to the right.
/
Jenny waited at the left, wearing a chef's hat and apron. In front of her were a collage of various wedding cakes, all at least twelve tiers tall.
"Am I right to assume the rings are hidden in the cakes?" Ignacio asked.
"Nothing like hiding a choking hazard in your deserts," Jenny teased. "No wonder you like baking Melissa."
"Um...I like baking as an outlet for my feelings," Melissa said. "I especially love to share feelings through it with-"
"-God you're lame!" Jenny gawked. "Just tear through these cakes and find two rings that match."
"That's all?" Tessa asked.
"Yeah...not!" Jenny snickered. "Once you finish searching a cake, you have to an entire piece from it before you can move on.
"Only a piece?" Vance asked, already in between bites of a cake.
Jenny shrugged. "Go crazy. It's your wedding after all."
/
To the right Toby stood behind a counter, likely a station for poker . He was dressed in a tuxedo. A clothesline ran above him, four lists pinned to it. Scattered nearby were all kinds of presents, from several feet tall cylinders to tiny boxes. Each had its own unique wrapping paper.
Riley arrived first at the station. "Sup Tobster. What's the dealio?"
"Hey Riley," Toby replied. "Basically, these lists are your different wedding registries. But they don't list your gifts; they list the eliminated newcomers."
"Huh?" Riley asked.
"Your goal is to find which presents were chosen by the past newcomers on your list," Toby explained. "Show them to me. You're right, you pass and I give you something."
"I think I'm following," Riley replied. "I wonder which list has Gris bear…"
Toby shrugged. "We randomly divided them. But there aren't an even number, so some lists are longer than others. First come, first serve."
Riley nodded, grabbing a list with only three names. "Weston, Zipporah, Bethany."
/
Ignacio tore through a twenty tier cake with his bare hands. "I don't suppose we have plates, do we?"
Jenny smiled. "Nope! You got hands and a mouth."
Vance groaned. His face and hands looked 'bloody' with frosting. "There ain't even a ring in this cake."
"And?" Jenny asked.
"Just keep trying Vance!" Melissa encouraged. "I haven't found any in three cakes.
Tessa, across from Melissa, nodded and winked.
"Oh dear, is there something in your eye?" Melissa asked.
Tessa almost facepalmed, before realizing the cake on her hand. "No. I just meant good plan."
"Plan?"
"Yeah," Tessa whispered. "Throwing the challenge? Brilliant."
"I really haven't had any luck," Melissa admitted. "Why would I throw the challenge?"
"Duh," Tessa replied. "If you lose, Kalino doesn't have immunity. Then we can vote him off. So if you aren't, maybe you should…"
"I couldn't do that," Melissa gasped. "It's unethical!"
"We have to get rid of Kalino soon," Tessa replied. "I mean, don't you think he sent Aiden home?"
"I don't know that," Melissa admitted. "I...I have my doubts about Kalino. But innocent until proven guilty. I'll vote him off if we lose but-"
"I don't have time for this stupid of an argument. If you won't throw it, then I guess we'll just have to beat you two. Good luck."
/
Kalino was the last to arrive at the poker table. After Toby explained the rules again he gave away the remaining sheet; Diamonique, Hayden, Lita, Griswold.
"Heh," Kalino forced a laugh. "Nice to know they don't hold a grudge. But what would they give?"
Ness undid a ribbon on a box and lifted the top. A swarm of bats flew out and began chasing her. "Ahhhhhh!"
Riley shook a lightweight present. Opening it, she found a magnifying glass. "Sweet! Weston probably left this as an amateur detective!"
Jasper sighed as he emptied another box. "I got a rock."
He threw it behind him, adding it to a pile of rocks forming.
/
"I've got one!"
Melissa cheered as she held up a heart shaped ring from the pink wedding cake she was searching.
Ignacio shook his head. "I haven't found one. I thought starting with the smaller cakes would be a great strategy, but…"
"Too bad you don't have x-ray vision Ignacio," Jenny teased.
Ignacio looked at her, only for his eyes to grow wide. "Wait...those x-ray glasses? You mean they're…"
"An actual advantage, duh!" Jenny replied.
Ignacio wiped his hands on his jacket as best he could and reached into his pockets. "I think I left it in here...found it."
Ignacio put on the x-ray spectacles. Using a dial on the side he adjusted them.
"I feel like I'm blind in one eye and can't see out of the other one," Vance sighed. "I didn't even find no gold baby or nothin'."
"Gold baby?" Tessa asked.
"You know, the little baby they hide in cakes," Vance replied.
"I believe that's only a Mardi Gras tradition dear," Melissa said. "I don't think they do that in wedding cakes."
Ignacio punched his hand through a gold cake, decorated with the figures of a king and queen getting married. He pulled out a small golden baby figurine. "Uhh…"
Ignacio raised the spectacles on his forehead. His palm was closed, but held out. "I found more than just an engagement ring in the cake."
He opened his palm to reveal the golden baby...and slid the head off the baby' bead, revealing it to actually be a flash drive. "I found a hidden immunity flash drive! I couldn't believe my eyes. I was secretly ecstatic at first...till I found the note inside."
From inside the baby figure's body, he pulled out a piece of paper and unfolded it. "Congratulations, at finding our secret flash drive for this special challenge. At New Orleans, whoever finds the baby hidden in a King cake is said to have good luck and prosperity. But prosperity comes at a cost. This flash drive has no powers currently. To mature this advantage and turn it into a real immunity flash drive...you must throw today's challenge. Doing so you'll gain immunity, at the cost of your partner. Have a blessed day."
Ignacio sighed and buried his head in his hand. "It would be foolish to waste this advantage. But I don't want to hurt Ness. I...I really like her. But I've already saved her twice, haven't I? I can't throw away my game for her...I hope she understands."
He grabbed the x-ray specs from his hand and snapped them in half.
Riley ran up to the counter and dropped everything in her arms. "Let's see, we got a Harlem Globetrotters' headband, a magnifying glass, and a book that's labeled poetry but is actually just the phone book. Bethany, Weston, and ZZ Zipporah. Bang!"
Toby nodded and handed her a key.
"Sweet!" Riley cheered. "Thanks Bromer Simpson!"
Japer emptied another box, and almost dropped a chainsaw on his feet. "Whelp, I found Cynthia…"
Ness compared two sets of sneakers in her hands. "I know one of these are Easton's brand...but which ones was it?"
Kalino rummaged around, pulling out a $100 Taco Bell gift card. "Classic Diamonique. Now what else we got…"
/
Ignacio slowly ate his piece of cake. Tessa compared two rings and groaned. She slide them on her fingers, gathering as many as she could. Vance lied on the ground holding his stomach.
"I haven't had this bad digestion since Baked Beangate 2014," Vance whined.
"Info I didn't need or want," Tessa replied.
"Come on," Jenny yawned. "Can't somebody-"
"-I have it!"
Melissa cheered, holding up another pink heart ring over a destroyed goth wedding cake. She ran over to Jenny, presenting her loot.
Jenny eyeballed them. "Yup, that's a match. Even the gemstones are near identical. I'd bet the jeweler's degree I printed out online on it!"
Melissa squealed and ran off, ignoring Tessa's eye roll.
/
Jasper opened a box and was rewarded with a pie in the face. "Ooh, blueberry."
"That's probably Frannie's," Kalino stated. "Blueberry was her favorite pie flavor."
Ness dropped off a pocket U.S. Constitution, a pair of running sneakers and a set of tarot cards. "Did I get it right?"
Toby shrugged. "Probably. Here, take a key."
Ness beamed. She almost tripped as she ran off.
"I guess it's just me and you Kalino," Jasper sighed. "...Kalino?"
Kalino took his key from Toby while presenting him the gift card, a mounted fish, a boxing glove and a teddy bear. Jasper facepalmed.
/
Kalino strolled up to the stage, where only Melissa, Riley, and Ness waited. Rhonda stood there as well.
"You did it Kalino!" Melissa cheered.
"Congrats you crazy kids," Rhonda replied. "You're almost ready to get married. But you need to look the part first! Come up to the lobby with me…"
/
A short bit later, Melissa and Kalino found themselves in front of an obstacle course. At the other end were locked cases containing a tuxedo and a wedding dress.
"We're not sure this relationship is really worthy of marriage," Rhonda said. "So we're going to test it with our divorce obstacle course!"
The two cringed as they examined the course; there was scattered mousetraps, broomsticks, tied knots to snare traps, split garbage, swinging boulders, chained angry puppies, and more.
"Furthermore, love is blind," Rhonda explained. "So one person in the couple will do the course blind, while the other will act as a caller and give directions."
"I'll do the course," Kalino stated.
"Are you sure?" Melissa asked.
Kalino shrugged. "It's like the chivalrous thing to do. Plus, I know I'm not your first choice for this kind of challenge. I feel a little bad you're stuck with me."
"Oh nonsense," Melissa replied. "I'm more than happy we're together. So let's do our best!"
/
Ignacio jogged towards the stage, where Jasper now joined the others waiting. "Oh, you've already finished Ness. That's...wonderful."
"I know!" Ness cheered while jumping. "We're still in this!"
Ness grabbed Ignacio by the hand and dragged him off. Tessa came panting as she ran up. "I have...the rings! And hey, we're not dead last."
She held out her hand for a high five, but Jasper turned away. "Come on, we gotta make up for lost time."
Tessa raised an eyebrow, but followed. She waved bye to Riley, who had taken to sitting on the stage as she waited.
/
At the course, Kalino wore a large wedding veil over his face, completing obscuring his vision. He was going through at an extremely slow rate.
"That's it!" Melissa encouraged. "Just keep going your natural pace! You're doing great sweetie."
Kalino shot up a thumbs-up. "Thankssssssss."
"We've still got a chance Ignacio," Ness cheered.
"I don't know," Ignacio stated. "It looks hazardous. Perhaps we should just stop while you're ahead."
Ness giggled. "Good one. But it's nothing worse than a normal challenge. I'm just glad we were a team. It's like we're the Fizzled Fireworks again!"
Ignacio forced a smile. "Yup, I feel the same way. Super glad. Me and you…"
Ignacio took the wedding veil and lowered it over his face. "Given the course, it's probably best if I do it. But I hope it's okay if I do go a slow pace, just so I don't hurt myself, y'know."
"Whatever you think is best," Ness replied. "I trust you Iggy."
Ignacio banged his head against the wall. "Lying to Ness is more painful than anything in this course."
Tessa and Jasper followed.
"Alright," Tessa said. "I'll call, you run."
"Um, why?" Jasper asked.
"My voice is naturally louder," the Olympian replied. "Plus, you probably won't even be noticed by the dogs in the course."
Jasper glared at her. "I don't know if I feel comfortable with you giving me orders in this challenge."
"What?" Tessa asked.
"In fact, I know I don't feel comfortable with it," Jasper replied. "So I'll call and you try to be invisible."
"Fine, fine, we don't have time to waste arguing…"
"Shocking coming from you," Jasper mumbled.
"You're going to have to speak up for me to hear you!" Tessa shouted, marching forward with the veil on her face. "Okay? Jasper? Jasper? Jasper? Jasp-ahhhhhh!"
"Watch out for the snare trap," Jasper said. "Loud enough for you?"
Tessa spun in place upside down. "Perfect, thanks."
/
"I'm coming!"
"Zzzzz...huh?"
Riley rubbed her eyes as she saw Vance running up to her. She yawned, standing up and stretching. "I was getting worried about you Vance the Kid...before I took a nap. Well, where are the rings?"
"Well, I uh...I went through all the cakes and didn't find-"
Suddenly, Vance started to cough violently. He hacked up two matching silver rings. "Uh, right here!"
"How charming," Riley sighed. "Alright dude, let's get back in this thing!"
/
"You wait here," Vance said, throwing the veil over his face. "I'll use my tracking skills to find our outfits!"
"Tracking skills?" Riley asked. "Dude, I thought you admitted you weren't a-"
"-I have," Vance replied. "But I have been practicing them, learning them with the books in the library. Just relax, I'll be faster than Scat Tom's tail in the gravy."
Vance ran forward and immediately walked into a broom. Riley facepalmed.
"You've got it Iggy!" Ness yelled.
Ignacio removed his veil to see he was touching a wardrobe with the outfits locked away. He looked around to see Kalino still moving slowly, Vance walking into brooms, and Tessa trying to remove a mousetrap from her ponytail.
"How?" Ignacio asked.
He opened the wardrobe, removing a wedding dress with a long trail and a white tuxedo.
"And Ignacio and Ness take the lead," Rhonda announced. "Now go get changed. A ride outside will be waiting to take you to your next destination."
Ignacio high-fived Ness, ignoring a look from Rhonda. "I promise I won't take long Iggy! I knew we were gonna win!"
"Yeah…"
"Go to the left Vance!" Riley yelled.
Vance walked right, falling into a trashcan.
"Do you not know your left from your right?" Riley asked.
"I was just testing you!" Vance yelled. "Now leave this to me!"
Vance jumped up and stampeded forward. He didn't stop as he stepped through mousetraps, or barely missed boulders, or walked into more brooms. He didn't stop until he walked face first into the wardrobe.
"And Vance has found it!" Rhonda stated. "He just has to unlock it...whenever he regains consciousness."
"I was worried about working with Vance," Riley admitted. "His challenge record is...well, sometimes he comes above dead last. But now that I'm working with him, I realize I was completely right to be worried. In fact, maybe I should have been more worried…"
Ignacio walked out, struggling to fix his tie. "Hopefully, this will take a few minutes."
"I'm ready!"
Ignacio turned and gasped as he saw Ness approached. She dressed elegantly, in the lacy dress. She even had a bouquet of white roses to match roses that decorated her veil. She walked forward slowly...only to trip on the trail of it and fall on her face. "I'm okay!"
Ignacio ran and helped her up. "Ness you look...amazing. I mean not that you don't always look amazing...I mean…"
Ness blushed. "Um, thanks. You look nice too."
The two stood there blushing and avoiding eye contact.
"So…" Rhonda said. "You guys going to stand there or…"
"The challenge!" Ness yelled. "Come on Ignacio, we have a lead to keep!"
Ness tried to run out of the door, only to fall on her face again.
/
"Got it," Kalino replied, as he lunged a chest. He removed his veil and pulled a light blue tuxedo and bow tie and a bedazzled wedding dress with lots of jewelry.
"They look gorgeous!" Melissa exclaimed. "I wouldn't want so much jewelry on my real wedding dress but…"
"Less talking, more changing!" Kalino yelled, throwing the dress on her head.
/
Ignacio and Ness ran outside. There were four taxis waiting on them, each saying 'Soon Married' on the back and tin cans tied with strings to them. They ran into the first taxi and sped off.
"Phew," Ness sighed. "For a second I thought Melissa and Kalino would gain on our lead."
"Yeah, that would've been a shame," Ignacio sighed.
Ness smiled at him and grabbed his tie. "Hear, let me get that for you. You know, I was kind of hoping we'd get paired together for the challenge."
"Really?" Ignacio asked.
"I mean not like that," Ness said. "I wouldn't want us to get married for real or anything like that. I just thought it'd be fun to work with you and knew you'd be a good partner. I'm not sure if I was as good…"
"You were the only one I wanted to work with," Ignacio stated.
Ness blushed and looked away. "You're too sweet sometimes Iggy. You know, I know you didn't vote for me with the other boys. Thanks."
"Of course," Ignacio replied. "I could never vote for you."
Ness sighed. "Well...maybe you should."
"Huh?" Ignacio asked.
"I mean now the guys might try to throw you under the bus," Ness stated. "Vance has been talking to Melissa a lot."
"He has?" Ignacio asked.
"Me and her decided to start sharing a room now," Ness admitted. "So we'd both be a little less lonely. I just don't want you to regret it."
"If I voted you off then you wouldn't be here," Ignacio replied. "We wouldn't be partners for this challenge. I have no regrets. Ness, I promise I will never vote you off."
Ness glared and punched his arm. "No!"
"Huh?" Ignacio asked.
"Don't promise me that," Ness stated. "Pascal promised me the same thing, and look how that turned out."
"I wouldn't never do that," Ignacio stated. "I care about you more than that clown. Ness, I-"
"-I don't want you to throw away this game for me," Ness said. "If you think voting me off is best, I want you to do it for you. If you want to make me a promise, promise you'll do whatever it takes to win."
Ignacio sighed and shifted, looking out his window.
/
Melissa and Kalino were also departing in their own taxi.
"Sorry that took so long," Kalino replied.
"It's not a problem," Melissa said. "Like I said Kalino, I'm not upset you're my partner."
"I just know I'm not marriage material, y'know?" Kalino asked.
Melissa put her hand on his shoulder. "Who said that? You are a sweet and a fun person Kalino. You need to have a little more self-confidence in yourself. Don't let others get to you...even if it's family."
Kalino chuckled. "Nah, it's not like that. I just don't see myself as the marriage type is all. And trust me, I don't care what my family thinks."
"I did see your sister at the loved ones challenge," Melissa said. "I heard what she said. I can't imagine it's easy growing up in a household like that."
Kalino shrugged. "I don't know mannnn. I usually feel fine. I admit...kind of worried about my future. But I guess that's what this show is for, right?"
"What are you going to do after the show?" Melissa asked.
"If I win?" Kalino asked. "I don't know, buy a house, a boat...an island? Or maybe just travel the world?"
"But what else?" Melissa asked. "I mean, you can't do that forever."
"Maybe I'll just join another reality show," Kalino replied. "Then I'll win more cheddar."
"I never thought of you as someone so concerned about money," Melissa admitted.
"I don't really care about having a lot of stuff," Kalino replied. "It's about the freedom. I mean I could do whatever I want almost. No limits when you're rich. That's what I want; to be me and do what I want. Nobody to stop me."
Melissa shifted. "That does sound nice I guess…"
"Can I ask you something?" Kalino said.
"Of course!" Melissa replied.
"Are you going to throw the challenge?"
"What?" Melissa asked.
Kalino shrugged. "I know you want to vote me off. I know the other girls have formed an alliance and roped you in-"
"-Well...I may have had the idea," Melissa admitted.
Kalino stared at her for a moment, before bursting into laughter. "Woah. I didn't see that coming. You got bigger kahunas than people give you credit for Melissa."
"Um...thanks?" Melissa replied. "I didn't really plan it and I'm not entirely proud of it, but I had to do what was best for me. But I would never throw a challenge. That's unsportsmanship like! Especially when I have a partner."
"Even when it's a partner all your allies want to vote out?" Kalino asked. "Do you believe all the things Tessa says about me?"
Melissa shook her head. "I know that the others believe you're a bad guy, but we were on the same team Kalino. I don't want to believe that."
"Thanks Mel," Kalino replied. "It's like how I don't believe you're a bad person either, even if you made an alliance and caused Weston to go home. I mean it's a game; there's no hard feelings."
Melissa looked to the ground.
/
Ignesscio's taxi slammed on its breaks. The couple got out and found themselves in front of a chapel.
"Of course!" Ness replied. "It is a wedding challenge."
The two ran towards the steps, but were stopped by a boom barrier. A makeshift toll booth and its pole blocked their path. Toby popped up out of the window.
"You got an invitation?" Toby asked.
"An invitation?" Ignacio asked. "It's our wedding. She in a bride's dress. You know, you just saw us!"
"No invitation, no entry," Toby replied.
"Okay, what's the challenge?" Ness asked.
"I'll let you through, if you can answer questions about your beloved," Toby stated. "But fail my questions, and you'll have to head back to the Pentagram and get an invitation from Rhonda."
"We can handle that," Ness bragged. "We're like best friends!"
"Alright then," Toby said. "What is Ignacio's favorite food?"
"Empanadas!" Ness replied. "His mom's signature dish."
"What's Ness' favorite food?" Toby asked.
"Clam chowder," Ignacio replied.
"What does Ness want to do for a career?" Toby asked.
"She wants to be a vet," Ignacio replied. "She has a love for animals."
"And what does Ignacio want to do?"
"Work as a science teacher!" Ness replied. "Which is great, cause he's so smart."
"What is Ness' favorite band?" Toby asked.
"One Rejection," Ignacio answered. "Followed closely by Ten Minutes of Winter. Blainerson Mcmanly is her favorite musician though."
"I didn't want a story with it," Toby replied. "Alright last question; What is Ignacio's biggest fear?"
Ness smiled. "Well its...it's...um...well actually...uhh...being naked in public?"
Toby dropped back down the boom barrier. He closed the window of his toll booth.
"Crap!" Ness yelled. "There goes our lead…"
/
Tessa and Jasper sat in their own taxi. Jasper wore a usual black tuxedo, while Tessa's wedding dress was feathery and came with white gloves.
"So we've had a few setbacks," Tessa stated. "But this challenge isn't over yet!"
Jasper shrugged. "Yeah, whatever."
Tessa glared. "Okay, what is your deal?"
"Huh?" Jasper asked.
"Why do you have a problem with me?" Tessa stated.
"I didn't say-"
"Not out loud," Tessa replied. "But you've been rude to me this entire challenge. Why?"
Jasper turned to look out the window. "I don't have to tell you anything."
Tessa pulled on his shoulder. "What is it? Is it voting for Weston? Is it for how I treated Lita before? Because we're cool now. I know I'm not the most pleasant or likable person, but I'm trying here. I mean, you were probably my first choice for this challenge."
Jasper rolled his eyes. "You were my last choice."
"Sorry you're stuck with me," Tessa sighed. "But we're a team."
"That's rich coming from you," Jasper replied.
"I didn't know you were capable of sarcasm," Tessa retorted. "And how would you even know?"
"Because I was on the Fizzled Fireworks with you," Jasper said. "Remember that?"
"Oh…"
"I don't want to do this challenge with you because I don't like you Tessa," Jasper admitted. "And you know, it might just be because to save your mean self you and Pascal convinced our entire team I was worthless. I was voted off because of you. So thanks for that."
Tessa facepalmed as Jasper looked away again.
"It's one step forward, two steps back," Tessa stated. "Every time I feel like I might not be completely reviled by everyone, something I did rears its head. It's like past me keeps sabotaging present me. But of course that's not accurate; it's not a past or present me. It's just me and my screw ups."
Melissa and Kalino arrived at the chapel. Toby opened the tollbooth window. "Have an invitation?"
Kalino pulled a dollar out his pocket. "Yeah, right here…"
"This is Monopoly money," Toby stated.
"Well the vending machines in the Pentagram take it," Kalino replied.
"If you don't have an invitation then you need to prove you're the bride and groom," Toby replied. "Convince me by showing you know each and answering my questions."
"Easy peasy!" Melissa replied.
"What's Kalino's favorite video game?"
"Mario Kart," Melissa answered. "Whichever one is for the Gamecube."
"Alright," Toby replied. "I'll take it. What is Melissa's favorite animal?"
"She doesn't have favorites," Kalino replied. "She loves all of them equally for the Earth and junk. Even fleas or tapworms."
"Gross," Toby said. "Who does Melissa really love on the show?"
"Aiden, duh," Kalino replied.
"And who does Kalino really love?"
"Well I don't like to speculate," Melissa admitted. "But...he and Frannie are close…"
"Were," Kalino sighed.
"Alright, then what does Melissa want to do if she wins Genesis?"
"Split it among a bunch of charities," Kalino replied.
"And if Kalino wins?"
"He...doesn't really know," Melissa replied. "He...just wants to be free."
Toby lifted the gate. "Alright, you're good. Enjoy your wedding kids!"
"Thank you Mr. Toby!" Melissa replied as the two ran up the steps.
Tessa and Jasper ran up to the gate, only to be blocked.
"If you don't have an invitation you can't pass," Toby stated. "Unless you can answer my questions and prove you know one another really well."
Tessa and Jasper shared a look. "Yeah...that's not gonna work."
/
Riley admired herself, wearing a tuxedo with a flame design. "This suit is rad! I appreciate you letting me take it Vancey, but uh…"
The camera panned to reveal Vance sitting next to her in the taxi, wearing the wedding dress. It was the fluffiest of all the wedding dresses, with frills and ribbons and poofy skirt. But it also had some decolletage on it. It even came with glass heels.
"...you didn't have to wear the wedding dress."
"Psh, I don't care," Vance replied. "My studdliness can't be contained in any clothes! Besides, I know you don't like dresses."
"I don't mind dresses," Riley replied.
"What?!" Vance asked. "You don't?"
"Nah," Riley replied. "I don't wear a lot because you have to sit careful, but I've worn them before. My bros bought me a whole thirty dollar dress for prom once, when my tuxedo had too many holes."
"Oh...well I'm more flattering in this anyway."
Riley shrugged. "Coolio. But you know, you don't have to try to impress me."
"Impress you?" Vance asked. "I can't help it if you're naturally impressed. The mustache usually does that."
Riley shook her head. "I just mean, you don't have to constantly assert your the best. You don't have to be the greatest tracker or toughest toughie. And you don't have to do the challenge alone. I am your partner."
Vance crossed his arms. "Sorry if I've been holding us back. I just...don't want y'all looking down on me."
"What?" Riley asked. "Why would we do that?"
"I grew up as poor redneck in a trailer," Vance stated. "My family was dirt poor. Literally; we couldn't always afford the water bill to bath."
"Dude, I'm not rich!" Riley replied. "I mean, I buy my clothes from thrift stores. And while they are the obviously superior shopping place, it is cheap. I'm basically poor too."
"I never thought about it like that," Vance replied.
"Who cares if we're poor?" Riley asked. "I mean I'd love a bunch of money, sure. I want to win it! But at least we're awesome people."
"You're right!" Vance replied. "Alright, I'll try to work as partners more."
"Sweet," Riley said. "And I totally don't mind switching into the dress if you want."
"I don't care," Vance replied. "Maybe I would've when I first joined the show, but now I realize it don't matter. I'm confident enough in my masculinity to wear a wedding gown."
Riley opened her mouth, but stopped when she saw another wedding taxi turn around. "Was that another team?"
Vance stuck his head out the window. "It sure was! You think we should follow them."
"Let's kick it!" Riley shouted. "Driver, after those newlyweds!"
/
Kalino and Melissa entered the church until they found the main assembly. At the altar, Jenny stood dressed like a priest.
"Welcome," Jenny greeted as they approached her. "I'll be your priest for this ceremony."
"Since when are you ordained?" Kalino asked.
"Since I printed off a certificate this morning," Jenny replied. "Now, does anyone have any objections for why these two should not be fake married for TV? Good, then please place your rings on each other...and kiss!"
Melissa's eyes grew wide. "Oh dear. Really?"
"Yeah," Jenny replied. "So I hope you brushed your teeth."
"But I have a boyfriend!" Melissa replied. "This doesn't feel right…"
"Look, Aiden will know you only did this for a challenge," Kalino replied. "It's like two actors kissing. Or sock puppets. No biggie."
Melissa nodded and closed her eyes. Kalino approached her and landed a peck on her lip.
"Bleh," Jenny gagged. "Hooray for you, you're married! Now to make it official and win the challenge, you'll have to ring the bells in the bell tower."
Kalino and Melissa high-fived.
"I'm not done!" Jenny yelled. "But while you do it, the bride has to be carried."
"That all?" Kalino asked. With a grunt, he picked Melissa up bridal-style.
"Oh, there's more," Jenny giggled. You'll just figure it out later."
/
Jasper and Tessa sat in their taxi, invitations in their hands. Tessa finally turned to Jasper.
"Look Jasper," Tessa said, "I'm sorry for eliminating you the first time. It wasn't fair to you and it shouldn't have happened."
"Thanks I guess," Jasper replied.
Tessa groaned. "I am sorry. And I know you don't believe that-"
"-I don't want an apology," Jasper said. "I don't want anything. Nothing can make me feel less embarrassed and pathetic than that did."
"You shouldn't feel that way," Tessa replied. "So the Fireworks voted you off first? Guess what, most of them are gone and you're here!"
"Only because of a twist," Jasper admitted.
He slumped further in his seat. "I know I shouldn't even be angry at you. You can't change it. Even if you hadn't, I'd probably still be voted off first."
Tessa shrugged. "I mean...yeah. Probably."
Jasper glared at her. "Thanks."
"I could be wrong," Tessa replied. "I wish I would be, but we all misjudged you. We still might have. But clearly you're not worthless. I mean, you've won the most challenges so far!"
"But Melissa-"
"-Okay, so you're tied," Tessa stated. "The point is, you're not useless. Our team could have used you. More than they could've used me. Everyone realizes and regrets that now."
Jasper rubbed the back of his head. "Thanks…"
"So let's end this tie and win this challenge!" Tessa stated.
Jasper nodded. "Yeah, together."
/
At the chapel, Ignacio and Ness waved their invitations at Toby.
"Alright," Toby said. "Get going."
"I still can't believe I didn't know you were afraid of Barney The Dinosaur," Ness stated.
"Please, let's not talk about it," Ignacio shivered.
The two ran forward and found Jenny at the altar.
"Alright," Ignacio panted. "What's the challenge now? Bouquet throwing? In-laws wrestling?"
"Oh it's easy," Jenny replied. "You two just have to kiss."
"Kiss?" Ignaco asked.
"Yeah," Jenny replied. "To make it official."
"Like...with our mouths?" Ignacio asked. "I don't...I mean I would but-"
"Iggy!"
Ignacio turned to Ness. "Look, I know you don't want to really kiss me. I feel the same. But it's just a challenge. We'll still be friends after. It won't mean anything."
"But I want it to mean something," Ignacio whispered.
Ness closed her eyes. "Just close your eyes and lean forward...I'm ready."
Ignacio gulped. Slowly, he leaned forward. He closed his eyes and puckered his lips and inches away from her face...his stomach rumbled.
"Ignacio?" Ness asked.
Ignacio opened his mouth...and started vomiting all over Ness and her face.
"I'm so sorry," Ignacio groaned. "I...I think I ate too much cake...oh god…"
Ness tried to step away but tripped on her dress and fall into more vomit.
"Gross, " Jenny groaned. "But still better than kissing…"
/
Kalino started carrying Melissa up a set of steps. "Okay, this...is a litttttle hard…"
"You're doing great," Melissa replied. We're almost to the top! Today wasn't how I pictured my dream wedding...but it was still marvelous. I just wish Aiden could've been my partner. No offense."
"None taken," Kalino replied. "He should be here. Too bad he was too snoopy to stay."
"What?"
"I just meant it sucks we voted him off," Kalino replied. "But I know you don't hold a grudge…"
"Yes, but too snoopy?" Melissa asked. "You and the other Eagles told Cynthia and I that Aiden was voted off for not helping in the challenge."
"It was a lot of reasons," Kalino admitted.
"You're the reason Aiden went home, aren't you?" Melissa asked.
"I voted for him but-"
"-But it was your idea," Melissa said. "And you convinced the others to do it, didn't you?"
Kalino shrugged. "I can't remember it."
"I knew it," Melissa stated. "I was trying to pretend like it wasn't possible, but you sent Aiden home! Who else did eliminate? Diamonique? Hayden? Griswold? Lita? ...Frannie?"
Kalino kicked open the door in front of them. "Does it matter? They're not here anymore."
"So you're not denying it," Melissa replied. "You pretend to be some chill nice guy, a friend...but you're a liar and a backstabber!"
"It's called playing the game," Kalino replied. "There aren't supposed to be hard feelings."
"Of course there are," Melissa said. "This isn't Yahtzee."
"Then I guess Weston should be hurt by you," Kalino replied. "I mean isn't your alliance the same thing?"
"No," Melissa replied. "It's-"
"-You can't throw stones from your glass high horse," Kalino said. "Or whatever the metaphor is. You're not better than me Melissa. You're just as guilty."
"I didn't lie to anyone," Melissa admitted. "But you've lied to just everyone. You've been using me, Weston, Xidorn...Vance. Is anyone really your friend?"
Kalino walked out to an enclosure. There were high wire balance beams hundreds of feet in the air. On the other side was the bell tower. Below them was a net. Slowly, Kalino stepped onto the high wire, inching out with Melissa in his arms.
"How?" Melissa asked. "How did you do it?"
"It was pretty easy," Kalino admitted. "People underestimated me; people usually do. And people always kind of will. So I realized along time ago that I don't need to work harder, just smarter."
"By smarter you mean using everyone?" Melissa asked. "Are you okay with that? Is that really worth it for 'freedom'?"
"Doesn't matter," Kalino replied. "I've already done it, so why stop now? Winning this show is the only thing that can make it worth it."
"And what if I stop you?" Melissa asked.
Kalino chuckled. "You're a stronger competitor than you look Melissa, but you're too much of a sweetheart. Sorry you're upset, I really am. But the only thing that changes, is that I'll just vote you off sooner."
Melissa growled. "You know, you are pretty smart Kalino. Maybe the smartest person here. But you know what your flaw is? You're lazy. Too lazy to plan or pay attention. And you've underestimated me for the last time. I maybe nice. But I'm not stupid. I'm not fragile. I'm not spineless. And I'm not letting you win! I promise you that!"
"And what are you going to do about it?" Kalino asked.
"This...tickle, tickle, tickle!"
Melissa began tickling Kalino under his armpits and he began laughing and squirming. He dropped Melissa. The sweetheart tackled Kalino at his legs, sending them both falling off the high wire and plummeting to the ground.
"Ahhhhh!"
They fall on the net. Melissa sat on top of her prisoner, while holding his leg back.
"I'm giving you a timeout," Melissa stated. "And no dessert tonight either."
"Now that's just inhumane," Kalino sighed.
/
Tessa, Jasper, Vance and Riley ran up into the altar, where interns mopped the floor.
"Ew," Tessa gagged. "Why does it smell so terrible in here?"
"Because love stinks," Jenny replied. "Which brings us to your next challenge. You have to kiss the bride."
The pairs gasped.
"Okay then," Vance said, throwing up his veil. "Kiss me like one of your French cowboys Riley."
"Gris, if you're watching," Riley stated. "I know you already know this means nothing, but I still feel like the worst. I promise I will super make out with you when this over!"
Riley rolled her eyes, grabbing Vance and then dipping him before planting a kiss on his lips.
"And you're good," Jenny stated. "Now you need to ring the wedding bells in the chapel! While carrying your bride."
"So where are the-!"
Vance ran forward and jumped on Riley's back. "CARRY ME WENCH!"
"Ouch," Riley grieved. "Shouldn't you carry me?"
"You didn't want me to do everything," Vance replied. "Plus I'm the one in the gown, so I think that makes me the bride. Now, getty up! We got bells to ring."
Riley started to carry Vance piggyback style.
Tessa turned to Jasper. "So…"
Jasper sighed.
"I get it," Tessa stated. "I know I'm-"
"It's not that," Jasper said. "It's just...I've never actually kissed anyone before. I've never even had a girlfriend. I was hoping my first kiss would be special."
Tessa smiled. "Close your eyes. I'll make it quick, I promise."
Jasper nodded and closed his eyes. Tessa leaned forward and gave a peck on his cheek.
"There," Tessa said. "Just a kiss on the cheek. You can keep saving that first kiss."
Jasper blushed. "Thanks…"
"And who says that counts?" Jenny asked.
"You didn't say a kiss on the lips," Tessa replied. "So loophole!"
Tessa jumped into Jasper's arms. Jenny shrugged as the two raced off.
/
Ignacio stood outside of a bathroom door, dabbing his clothes with a wet paper towel. Ness exited the women's restroom, doing the same.
"I'm really sorry," Ignacio said.
Ness shrugged. "It's okay, it's not like this was a real wedding. Or my own dress. If I ever did get married I always wanted to wear my mother's wedding dress. I actually keep it in my closet just for safekeeping."
Ignacio smiled. "I'm sure it's wonderful."
"Yeah," Ness replied. "I wish she could've seen me in it."
"Oh," Ignacio said, "I'm sorry…"
"It's fine," Ness replied. "She died delivering me so it's not like I knew her."
"If I get married I'd like the ceremony to be in Chile," Ignacio stated. "I could visit relatives I've never met there, take my mother home to visit her relatives."
"That's really sweet," Ness replied. "I mean we're not planning on getting married soon anytime. I need to find a boyfriend first."
"You'll find one," Ignacio said. "You're too sweet and cute not to have one."
Ness blushed. "You too! I mean, not a boyfriend. But a girlfriend who respects you and cares about what you want."
Ignacio smiled. "Actually I-"
"Of course I don't want a boyfriend right now I think," Ness admitted.
"Really?" Ignacio asked.
Ness nodded. "Just seeing how upset Lita has been and sad everyone's been when they lose their boyfriend or girlfriend makes me kind of want to wait before I start dating."
"That makes sense," Ignacio admitted.
"But if the right guy came along I might change my mind," Ness replied.
Ignacio smiled...till his stomach started growling again. He ran back to the bathroom leaving Ness to laugh to herself.
/
Jasper and Tessa ran neck and neck with Riley and Vance up the stairs.
"Where is Melissa and Kalino?" Vance asked.
"Maybe they got lost," Jasper said. "It's still anyone's game."
"Fat chance partner!" Vance replied. "This challenge is ours! Ride like the wind Riley!"
Vance tapped Riley with his glass slippers as the bro cringed. "Worst challenge yet."
"I don't know," Tessa replied. "I'm enjoying it, especially the part where we win!"
Riley sighed, falling to the ground. Vance yelped as he fell off her back and started tumbling down the stairs.
Jasper and Tessa high-fived as they ran through the door and came to the tightrope.
"Uhh," Jasper said. "I'm not sure about this."
"You've got this," Tessa said. "It's all about keeping your center of gravity and finding your balance. Trust me, I'm a gymnast."
Jasper took a deep breath and stepped out onto the wire. He moved at an average pace and made it across in time. Above them hung a giant rope. Together they grabbed it and rang the bell. It echoed all around the church.
From behind them, doves flew from the chapel and into the sky. Rice started to rain all around them.
"We did it!" Jasper cheered. "Yes!"
"Woo!" Tessa said. "We ended up making a great pair."
"Yeah, we did," Jasper said. "You're actually really nice Tessa."
"Thanks," Tessa replied. "You're pretty cool."
You know, maybe we could be friends," Jasper said.
"Are you kidding?" Tessa asked.
"Oh."
"Of course!" Tessa replied.
"Oh," Jasper said. "Awesome."
/
In the Pentagram, the newcomers had changed out of their wedding outfits and stood around Rhonda.
"Mazel tov again to Tessper," Rhonda said. "I was rooting for ya. As today's challenge winners you have invincibility tonight and will share the luxury suite with each other. But you also win today's special reward! Your honeymoon trip to anyone of the network's hotels!"
"We won a honeymoon?" Jasper asked.
"Let's go somewhere exotic," Tessa said. "Like to Hawaii or Brazil!"
"Yes," Rhonda said. "A honeymoon to any one of the network's hotels...in Washington, D.C."
Tessa and Jasper glared at the hostess.
"For the rest of you, I've got nothing but heartbreak," Rhonda said. "Because you will be voting someone off tonight. See you then!"
/
Melissa chopped carrots in the kitchen, humming to herself. Vance strolled in.
"So," Vance said, "Any more thoughts on what we discussed the other day?"
"I'm not voting Ignacio off tonight," Melissa stated. "There is someone else who needs to go home."
"Do what you have to do," Vance replied. "But just know, he's voting for you. And he's not the only one…"
"Kalino too?"
Vance nodded. "I don't know what happened today. But I'm not voting for either of you."
"I wouldn't ask you too," Melissa replied. "Thank you for the warning Vance. And...I think I need to pass a warning on to you."
"Huh?" Vance asked.
"The other girls aren't sure if we should vote for Kalino," Melissa admitted. "They're worried if he has a flash drive, he'll use it. So they're debating about splitting the vote or changing it entirely. Your name has come up."
Vance tipped his hat at her. "I appreciate the tip. I hope I'm talking to you in the kitchen tomorrow morning."
"Me too," Melissa replied.
Vance exited as Melissa returned to her cooking.
"Hey Melissa."
Melissa looked up to see Kalino standing there. He was eating one of her cupcakes.
"I admit it, you got me today," Kalino said. "But if you thought that was smart, you're so wrong. Whoever goes home tonight is on your head."
Kalino waved and strolled out.
/
Everyone gathered in the Haunted Internet Cafe, trying to give one another a look without saying anything.
Melissa nodded at Vance, then glared at Kalino, while Kalino smirked at her and then winked at Jasper.
Jasper shrugged at anyone who looked at him, while Riley and Tessa whispered amongst themselves and pointed at Vance.
Vance spat in Ignacio's direction, but Ignacio was too distracted giving worried glances to Ness, who gave her own to him when he wasn't looking.
"Based on all that's going on with y'all, I'm guessing something is happening tonight," Rhonda stated. "The wedding is over, and it's about to feel like a funeral for one of you. So let's get voting."
Melissa clicked on Kalino's face. "I should have done this a lot sooner. Everyone said you were a rat Kalino...and I guess they were right. I still feel bad for you in a way, but I think you know deep down you need to go home. I'm not letting you win this show..."
"And the votes are in," Rhonda stated, looking over the results. Jenny carried out a tray of eight coffee cups. "Tonight's flavor is nutmeg espresso made with rice milk creamer. Whoever does not get a cup must exit through the Revolving Doors of Shame and take the Bus of Losers out of here. It means the game is over for you and there aren't any more chances. You've lost."
Rhonda tossed two cups to Jasper and Tessa. They clinked them. "Our first cups are for our winners of course!"
"Also safe is Vance...and Ignacio."
Vance groaned but caught his cup. Ignacio raised an eyebrow. Ness smiled and put her hand on Ignacio's shoulder.
"And Ness."
Now Ignacio smiled as he caught her cup and gave it to the jinx.
"Then we have Riley..."
Riley sighed in relief.
"And then...Kalino."
Melissa tried to contain her gasp. The slacker caught his cup and sipped it loudly.
Kalino inserted his black floppy disk into the machine. "It's so cute that Melissa thinks she can vote me off. But the sad part is, she's not even going to vote for me herself. Thanks to my steal a vote advantage, she's going to send herself home."
Kalino snickered as he clicked Melissa's face. He clicked it a second time for his vote. Then, he pulled out his golden immunity flash drive and plugged it in. "And this is just incase you sick your alliance on me...Sorry Melissa. You were a good teammate and a good player...but not a good enough one…"
"And so the final cup of coffee goes to…"
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"...Melissa."
Melissa sighed as she caught her cup. She smirked at Kalino, who raised an eyebrow. "Wait...whatttttt?"
Melissa winked. "You're not the only one with a trick up your sleeve."
"...which is why I'm using my flash drive tonight," Melissa continued in her voting confessional. "I know you're targeting me Kalino; like I said I'm not dumb. If you somehow slink by tonight, then I'l be here to take you out next time..."
Rhonda looked over the results. "Umm…"
The newcomers looked around at each other, each sipping their own cup of coffee.
Jasper scratched his head. "So...who is going home?"
Rhonda stared at them. "One, two, three, four...Jenny?"
"Huh?" Jenny asked.
"Why did you give me eight cups of coffee?" Rhonda asked.
"Because Toby gave me eight," Jenny replied.
"Toby...why did you give her eight cups of coffee?"
"Because the results said to," Toby answered.
"Why would I need eight cups of coffee...at the FINAL EIGHT!" Rhonda screamed.
"Maybe there was a glitch in the machine," Toby replied. "I'm just telling you, the results said we needed eight cups of coffee because eight people were safe."
How?" Rhonda asked. "That's...wait a minute…"
"Ignacio could have won today," Ness sighed. "But my bad luck jinxed us both! I know Vance is going to target Iggy, but I won't let him go home thanks to me."
From her pocket, Ness pulled out an immunity flash drive. "If he can't have invincibility, I can at least give him immunity."
Ignacio held up a note and read it. "Congratulations. You threw the challenge for you and your partner. Your immunity flash drive has been activated."
Ignacio crumpled up the paper and tossed it away. "Great. Ness was depending on me and I threw her under the bus. What if the guys decide to target her again? I don't deserve this flash drive."
Ignacio pulled out the golden baby from his pocket and shoved it the monitor. "At least I can make it worth something. I can give Ness the immunity she should have had."
Riley held her immunity flash drive. "This vote is freaky. Everyone has flash drive fears! Will Kalino use it? Will they vote for Melissa? Will they vote for us cause they fear a flash drive? I mean I could be getting the votes! And I'm thinking... I can only use this thing now or the next ceremony. So, what the heck?"
"I trust Melissa," Vance replied. "And if she thinks I might be the target now, then I should be more scared than a turtle in a wash bin."
Vance lifted his hat...and pulled out a flash drive. "I was trying to use the commode the other day, and it was still clogged. So I took a plunger out of the closet to save the day again. But then... I struck gold! And my gut tells me I need to use this little guy…"
"Oh my god!" Rhonda cried.
"Did you figure it out already?" Tessa asked.
Rhonda slammed her laptop shut. "According to this, all of you are immune from the votes!"
"What?" everyone asked.
"How can everyone be immune?" Tessa asked. "Only Jasper and I actually won invincibility."
Riley forced a laugh. "Well, I did win an immunity flash drive that I used tonight…"
"I also had one," Melissa admitted.
"Same," Kalino added.
"I found one instead of a turd," Vance explained. "So I used it."
"You mean Vance of all people figured it out before us?" Tessa sighed.
"But I didn't use my flash drive on myself," Ness replied. "I used it on Ignacio…"
"And I used mine I you," Ignacio admitted.
The two looked at each other and blushed.
"So if none of us could get votes, then the results thought we all should get cups," Jasper said.
"Trippy," Riley said. "So does that mean no one goes home?"
"Of course not," Rhonda replied. "We have a schedule to keep."
"What happens now?" Kalino asked.
"I...have no idea," Rhonda said. "This isn't supposed to happen…"
"Well it did," Tessa complained. "I mean, didn't you think six flashdrives was a bit much?"
Rhonda pulled out a large rulebook. "Everybody just be quiet! I'm sure I made some kind of rule in case of this…"
She flipped through the giant book, before finally stopping at a page. "Let's see, 'if all votes are cancelled out then the contestants must all revote for someone who is not immune. If it happens that all contestants are immune, then this is to be treated like a tie. The preselected tiebreaker should be used unless it was a revote…"
"What if the tiebreaker is a revote?" Ness asked.
"Then we would use the previous tiebreaker that wasn't a revote," Rhonda replied. "But it wasn't a revote…"
"So what is the tiebreaker?" Jasper asked.
Rhonda grinned from ear to ear. "Toby, grab their cups and toss one out. I have to go make a few calls…"
/
The newcomers were forced to sit in silence as they waited. Twenty minutes later, Rhonda returned with a tray of seven cold cups. Toby pushed in a TV screen.
"So what are we doing?" Tessa asked.
"You aren't doing anything," Rhonda replied. "Your fate has already been decided."
Rhonda turned on TV Screen and a tape began to play, showing a familiar face.
"Gris?" Riley asked.
"Today's tiebreaker...was a loser's vote."
"There's only one person I can vote for," Griswold explained. "Kalino. Even if you hadn't caused my elimination, you've sent my friends home, played dirty at every chance, and lied to basically everyone. How can I not vote you?"
"I think all of the final 8 are great," Bethany said. "They all have played amazing…except Kalino. There's a difference between playing hard and being a villain. You should learn it."
Aiden held a hand over his heart, wiping away a tear. "While it pains me to vote for a former teammate, I have to chose Kalino. This season represents our nation and the winner will represent this season. If Kalino wins what does that tell other countries about us?"
I think a couple of my visions were trying to warn me about you Kalino," Seraphina recalled. "You don't need a psychic to tell you who I'm voting for, huh *******?"
A tired Pascal sat in the confessional, with Amanda Picklestein sitting on his lap.
"I-"
"Pascy-Wascy is one-hundred totally voting Kalino," Mandy stated. "Like ohmygosh, he's like the bad guy and Pascal wants to redeem himself, soeventhoughtheywereroommatesthatdoesn'tblahblahbla-"
Easton and Weston sat in the confessional together.
"We vote Kalino," they said in unison.
"I do consider Kalino a friend," Weston said. "And Easton said he'd vote for someone else if I wanted…but I just don't think anyone else deserves to go home. Sorry pal."
Easton patted his brother's shoulder. Weston smiled and hugged his brother.
"So rumor through the grapevine is that Kalino had the Canadians vote me off," Lita sighed. "Well, I've been making sure to tell everyone here to vote Kalino off. I know I'm not the only one either. Hope the ride was worth it Kalino."
Zipporah stared at the confessional. "Kalino. You smile too much and your shirts are too colorful. Also, you're like an asshole or something apparently?"
Diamonique laughed. "Payback is a ***** and so am I. Kalino caused my elimination twice! Well, maybe I kind of caused that second one…but I still hate him. I want revenge. In fact, can I vote for Kalino twice?"
"To be honest, Kalino was a good friend to me in the game," Xidorn admitted. "But he also told massive lies. He didn't even have to tell some of them! As a member of the Peanut Gallery of Losers, it's my duty to vote for him."
"I honestly feel bad for Kalino," Hayden stated. "Not bad enough not to vote for him, but he clearly has issues with authority because of his strained relationship with his father, a complex about success, self-destructive tendencies…"
Cynthia stared at the camera with her unblinking eyes. "Kalino."
Frannie sat in the confessional quietly. She said nothing for a moment, before shaking her head. "So the shoe's on the other foot now, huh? I know who I should vote for. I should get my revenge and rub it in their face. I should deliver some ironic justice. But still, after all this time...I just can't vote for Kalino. I know it won't a make difference. But it won't make me happy. I guess I just vote for Vance or something…"
Kalino sat there staring at the screen. He said nothing. Around him, everyone else had gotten their coffee cups.
Tessa was struggling to contain her laughter. "Okay...can we watch that again?"
"The votes have spoken," Rhonda said. "It's over for you Kalino."
Everyone stared at the slacker. He shrugged. "Oh well."
"What?" Tessa asked.
"That's it?" Riley asked. "I was expecting a bit more…"
"What can you do?" Kalino asked.
"But you were defeated," Melissa stated. "And so close to the end. Aren't you even a little upset?"
"I do feel bad that it was all for nothing," Kalino admitted. "But it sounds like I probably wouldn't have won if I made it to the end anyway. I don't have any hard feelings. You guys got me. Congrats."
Everyone shared a look.
Kalino stared at the confessional screen and shrugged. "Well, this is the last time you'll see me in here. I admit I regret some things I did here...but I know when I did them I might lose. I'm not really sure if I ever thought I could win really. I just did what I always do...try to get by. I guess I was always meant to fail. Maybe everyone was right about that. Sorry dudes."
Kalino stood in front of the Revolving Doors of Shame.
"Wait, don't you want to say one last thing?" Rhonda asked. "I mean, don't you want to tell everyone your final words before you leave?"
Kalino nodded. "Good luck. You guys are awesome."
With that, he left. Everyone sat in silence for a moment.
"Well, I think we all learned a valuable lesson today," Rhonda said.
"What's that?" Jasper asked.
"Advantages suck and we're never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, using them again. EVER."
Author's Note
I couldn't wait to re-read and edit this chapter. I remembered really liking it, but re-reading? I'm even higher on it than before. Obviously it's just my own personal opinion, but I really enjoyed it. The challenge was a lot of fun. But the character interactions really sold me. Everyone shared a little bit about themselves and there were a lot of character moments between the pairs. I like the insight we got on them.
Then you top it off with that elimination. I'm sure you were wondering why some many immunity flash-drives just kept popping up. Truth is, I never planned for any of them to be used successfully. I can't say I'll never use advantages again or I'm above using them, they're a useful tool. But often they just exist in TD canon and fics to give an excuse to spare a villain and have little effect on anything else. Instead of saving the villain, I wanted it to be the reason they left.
Speaking of, that elimination. It might be one of my favorites in Genesis, especially as far as karmic eliminations go. It's very satisfying to 'Leshawna' the actual main villain, since that rarely happens. I tried to mention some of the losers through-out the chapter to foreshadow their involvement. Hoist by their own petard eliminations are fun, a staple of TD, and I was happy to do that here (while also not maiming them).
Kalino himself is a very interesting character. Reader reactions were divisive, which is normal for a TD antagonist I think. Some really loved him, others hated him. Me personally, he grew on. I wanted a villain who was different from the norm. Not a Heather or a sexy guy. I thought about a comedic character who turned out to be a villain. Kalino is interesting to write because he is a genuinely chill person who can be nice, but can as easily hurt and use people. He feels very motivated and is controlled more by his feelings and the pressure of his family then he realizes. I think he's complex and that's nice to write. But that's just me. I'd love to hear readers' opinions about him.
With this, we have the final seven and seven chapters left! I'm so excited for what comes next. Specifically, next chapter. It ties with 18 as possibly my favorite chapter, and I know it's a lot of previous readers favorite too...
Appendix: Elimination History
Bethany (Eagles)- 22nd
Diamonique (Eagles)- RETURNED
Jasper (Fireworks)- RETURNED
Tessa (Fireworks)- RETURNED
Zipporah (Fireworks)- 21st
Hayden (Eagles)- 20th
Frannie (Eagles)- 19th
Aiden (Eagles)- 18th
Pascal (Fireworks)- 17th
Easton (Fireworks)- 16th
Seraphina (Fireworks)- 15th
MERGE
Cynthia- 14th
Griswold- 13th
Xidorn- 12th
Diamonique- 11th
Lita- 10th
Weston- 9th
Kalino- 8th