In the Pentagram's arcade, Riley played pinball half-heartedly.
"Hey."
She turned to see Ignacio walking over. "S'up?"
From behind his back, Ignacio pulled out a paper bag. "'Brorrito'?"
Riley lit up, snagging the bag and chowing down on the first burrito. "Heck yeah! Thanks Iggy."
"How are you holding up?"
Riley shrugged. "It sucks Sweet T left, but I'm trying not to mope over it."
"I wouldn't expect anything less," Ignacio admitted. "I am sorry that-"
"-Don't. It was a good move for you. Some good came out of it for me too."
"How so?"
Riley finished her burrito in one final bite. "Because I know who I want in the final 3; you, me, and Ness."
"The girl's alliance is dead," Riley stated. "Once again Melissa plays the killer. I understand Tessa was being pigheaded, but you didn't have to vote her off. If Melissa didn't change her vote, Jasper would've left. The plan would've worked, we'd still be eliminating the boys. She broke from the plan as much as Tessa. Melissa thinks it was her best move. Fine. Then I'll do mine and vote her off."
"Are you serious?" Ignacio asked.
Riley nodded. "We've been together this far, and we shouldn't have split up. If I have to lose against someone I'd want it to be one of you two."
"I couldn't agree more," Ignacio replied.
"I don't know if Loch Ness would join us though," Riley admitted.
"You don't think so?"
"I mean maybe she would, but she and Melissa are pretty tight. You're sharing the penthouse suite with her. Do you think she would?"
Ignacio scratched his chin. "I'd hope so. If you aren't working with Melissa, she should see we'd have the numbers."
"Maybe you should bring it up to her," Riley said. "When you're snuggling tonight or something."
Ignacio blushed deeply. "Wh...what? We aren't, I would never...I may I wouldn't never, because Ness is a beautiful young lady of course but I don't...um…"
Riley fall to the floor chuckling. "Oh god Iggy! Sorry to laugh at your crush, but man?"
"Wait, you know?" Ignacio asked.
"Are you kidding?" Riley asked. "You sharing your suite with her, you during the whole wedding challenge, how obviously jealous you were of Andre, you're-"
-I get it, I'm not subtle," Ignacio stated. "And you didn't say anything?"
"Didn't want to embarrass you," Riley said. "Guess that still happened though. I know you wanted to keep it secret. You did a good job too...for a little bit."
"Hope it wasn't as bad as you and Gris," Ignacio teased.
Riley rolled her eyes, but smirked. "Okay, you got me. I guess love is alway obvious to other people. So...when are you going to tell her?"
Ignacio's eyes widened. "Um...uh...well…"
"You are going to tell her, right?"
"I don't know. I want to but...do you think she likes me?"
Riley paused...then shrugged.
"That's helpful."
"I can't tell," Riley admitted. "It's hard whether she likes you or is just affected by your sexy magic."
"Please don't call it that," Ignacio said.
"But that's what it is," Riley replied. "Listen, Ness likes you as a person. I think it might be like liking you...but I'm split."
"I don't want to ask her if she doesn't feel the same way," Ignacio said.
"What's the worst that could happen?" Riley asked.
"She says no," Ignacio replied. "Then she's consumed with guilt for rejecting me on national TV. She starts blaming herself, psyches herself out of a challenge, decides to vote herself off, then is derided by internet trolls. Or she says yes out of pity for those reasons and regrets it. Either way, she'll have a breakdown explaining it to a therapist and our friendship is ruined."
"First off; we'll all need therapy after this show," Riley explained. "Second; you know that's too ridiculous to happen, right? Finally, give Ness some credit. I think being asked out by a hot super model won't ruin her life."
"I don't want to hurt her," Ignacio said. "Or make things awkward between us."
"Bottling up your emotions isn't healthy," Riley replied. "Plus, if you don't speak soon, you might regret it."
Ignacio sighed. "Why are you right?"
"Cause I always am!"
Ignacio smirked. "Like how you said you didn't like Gris?"
"Just for that I'm eating your brorrito too," Riley stated, running off with the bag as Ignacio chased her.
/
At the dining hall, Jasper was eating a peanut butter sandwich on white bread; his favorite naturally.
Vance tipped his cowboy hat as he walked by carrying ropes over his shoulder. "Jasper."
Jasper spit back up his food.
"What?" Vance asked.
"You...you remembered my name," Jasper said.
"And?" Vance said.
"It's just...everyone's said my name right once today," Jasper continued. "I don't know if that's ever happened."
Vance sighed and plopped down into the seat next to Jasper. "You know I feel you for Casper, I really do."
"And there it goes," Casper sighed.
"I use to feel invisible myself," Vance stated. "I grew up with three brothers and two sisters. I was never able to stand out till I joined the rodeo."
"Where you become a star?" Jasper asked.
"Not overnight," Vance said. "I stank so bad I'd make a maggot gag. But even when they told me to give up, I didn't quit. Eventually I was a pro. I became Vigorous Vance! The Bucking Bronco! That could be you."
"A bronco?"
"No bud," Vance sighed. "A champ! The secret is confidence."
Jasper frowned. "What do I have to be confident about?"
"Well you're in the final six on a super popular reality show for starters," Vance stated. "And while I'm obviously going to win, you should be proud anyway. You don't even need something to be confident."
"What do you mean?"
"Just act confident," Vance stated. "If you act confident, you'll be confident. You gotta strut like a rooster and crow when the sun's out."
"But I'm not-"
"Who cares? Act like it. People will respond to it, they'll notice it. They'll notice you. Heck, it may surprise you but sometimes I don't know what I'm doing! I just act confident and do it anyway."
"Wow," Jasper deadpanned.
"I know it's crazy!"
"So you're saying I should lie?" Jasper asked.
Vance slaps him upside the head. "Not at all! Don't go talking with the tongue out of your shoes. It's not lying to try and believe in yourself."
Jasper smiled a little. "You're actually kind of right. I guess it wouldn't hurt to try."
"Growing a thick mustache would also help," Vance added, stroking his. "The mustache oozes confidence. It lets you smell the last meal you ate too."
"It's eye-opening when Vance is the one giving you life advice," Jasper admitted. "Maybe he's right and I should act more confident. If I acted like a winner, maybe I actually could be the winner…"
"Man I should get my own reality show helping people through stuff," Vance said. "Dr. Vance. Sounds sexy, don't it?"
In the kitchen, Melissa was preparing lunch. "Are you sure you don't want to step in dear?"
Ness stood right outside of the doorway. "We've been over this Melissa, kitchens don't like me."
"But kitchens-"
Ness stuck her hand in the doorway then immediately retracted it as several knives, heavy pots, and a sledgehammer fell down.
"Point taken," Melissa replied.
Melissa frowned. "Ness, I am really sorry that I voted off Tessa."
"It's okay, I'm not mad. You've already apologized too...like five times," Ness replied. "I understand why you did it."
"I just feel really bad. It was so shifty of me!"
"I don't think you're some villain mastermind," Ness giggled. "I still trust you. I've got your back."
Ness hugged Melissa as she exited the kitchen.
"Just do me a favor and let me know next time."
Melissa nodded. "I promise. Honestly, I think I want to go to the Final 2 with you."
"Really?"
"Of course!" Melissa replied. "You're my best friend left in this game. Plus I owe it to you for working with me when I needed it."
Ness forced a smile. "Okay then, let's do it!"
/
The jinx followed her friend as they took lunch out to the dining hall. Riley raced in as Ignacio followed and finally snatched the bag.
"Thank you very much," Ignacio stated.
Ness giggled. "You guys know you have a free lunch here, right?"
"What can I say?" Riley replied. "I never not want a brorrito."
"More food for me thdn," Vance replied, making a second plate at the same time.
"It's funny at six I'm still making portions for nine," Melissa teased.
"You should go for ten," Vance said.
"This is why I eat before Vance does," Jasper joked.
The sound of sirens pierced through their laughter. It took minutes before it finally passed.
"Oh dear," Melissa said. "I hope that isn't for here. Not any of those poor interns."
"The two that are left," Ness added.
"I suspect it's for the fire," Ignacio said. "Most of Washington was closed down. I was fortunate the burrito store was even open."
"I wonder why," Jasper asked.
Vance said nothing, but glared off into the distance.
"WHAT? How?"
The newcomers turned to see Rhonda walking in. She was on the phone.
"What did make it out?" She asked. "Hmm...I guess put it with rest of the challenge props in that old warehouse. We'll figure something out."
Turning to face the newcomers, she said, "The challenge will be postponed for tomorrow morning."
She returned to sighing into the phone and left.
Everyone shared a look.
/
The next morning, the newcomers woke up early. They waited to hear more at the dining hall, but were only met by Toby. He informed them the challenge was pushed back to this afternoon.
"Is something going on Tobster?" Riley asked.
Toby shrugged. "If you have to worry, we'll let you know."
He left without saying anything else.
"You think it's a schedule change?" Jasper asked.
"Maybe another returnee?" Melissa suggested.
"Let's pray not," Vance sighed. "Probably just budget cuts."
"That would explain why the kitchen hasn't been restocked," Melissa admitted.
/
Exactly at 12:00 P.M., the newcomers gathered into the lobby. They were met by Jenny, Toby and an angry Rhonda. She turned and looked at Vance.
"Are you aware of what's going?" she asked.
"Uh...we're going to have lunch?" Vance asked.
"No," Rhonda replied. "Let me give you a little hint; YOUR HORSE IS DESTROYING EVERYTHING!"
"Oh, so when Tinfoil destroys a city he's my horse," Vance complained.
"So that's why the challenge is being stalled," Riley said.
"Is there a challenge?" Jasper asked.
"Well we were going to handcuff y'all together," Rhonda explained. "Do a partners chain gang challenge through the Smithsonian… but it's been closed because of the horse. So we were going to do a rock and roll themed challenge, but the horse destroyed our stage. And instruments.Then we were going to do a hot air balloon race, but the horse popped the balloons. Then we were going to do a giant barbeque grilling duel challenge, but the horse destroyed the grill. And ate the giant sausages. Then we settled on just who could make a better dinner. But all the grocery stores have been closed, because the horse has pillaged them all!"
"So...there's no challenge today?" Vance asked.
"You wish."
Rhonda kicked open the doors of the Pentagram to reveal an abandoned Washington D.C. No one was on the streets. Shops were closed, windows were shattered, sirens were ringing in the distance, and small fires were scattered and burning.
"That horse has finally gone too far," Rhonda said. "Washington, D.C. is in a state of emergency and everything is closed. People are too afraid to leave their homes, but can't escape the city."
"That's horrible!" Melissa cried.
"Right?" Rhonda asked. "I have a show to do! We can't work under these conditions. And while we are completely and utterly non-liable for its mass destruction, it's still associated with our brand. We can't keep doing Genesis as long as it's running free."
"But no one can stop it," Jasper said.
"Well, someone has to," Rhonda replied. "And that someone is of you! Today's challenge is to capture that horse. Whoever does wins invincibility and...um...an advantage at the next challenge!"
"Why us?" Jasper asked.
"Because I believe in you six," Rhonda stated. "I've seen what you've done, what you've been able to overcome on this show. You're some of the strongest, toughest, smartest people I know."
The newcomers all shared a look and beamed.
"Also, you're the only ones available."
"And we have no other ideas," Toby stated.
"Plus we have to do some kind of challenge," Jenny said. "We've got a schedule to keep."
"I can't believe I'm saying this," Ignacio started, "but what if we got Cynthia? She could take care of it."
"Too messy," Rhonda stated. "We're already dealing with a bunch of different animal rights activists because of her stunts. You need to capture that horse alive."
"Are they any other rules?" Ness asked.
"I don't really care how you capture the horse," Rhonda stated. "You can even work together if you want. But if you try to do it all together and get all six of you invincibility then I'm giving none of you invincibility."
"But what if none of us can capture it?" Jasper asked.
"Then the show will be relocated somewhere lamer," Jenny said. "At the expense of the prize money. Or more likely, we'll just be cancelled."
"Ain't no way that's allowed!" Vance stated.
"Sucks to suck," Jenny teased. "Now, don't come back till you have captured the horse!"
Jenny slammed the door and locked it. The newcomers could hear the sound of furniture being barricaded.
"Now what?" Ness asked.
Riley shrugged. "I guess we better figure out a plan."
Vance stomped his foot. "I'm not having it. I swear on my name, on my honor that I'll bring in that dang horse! Or my name isn't-"
Vance was interrupted by a low neigh.
The newcomers slowly turned to see the wild horse staring them down like a matador bull.
Jasper gulped. "Uh oh."
"Maybe it's just confused," Melissa stated. "He was taken from its home and let loose in the city. He's probably terrified. No one stopped to help him after he started rampaging out of fear."
Melissa waved at the horse. He ran towards her, spinning backwards and bucking her with his back legs. Melissa was sent slamming into a nearby open dumpster.
"Nope," Melissa groaned. "It's just really mean…"
"As the horse expert," Vance said. "I think we should...run! RUN FOR THE HILLS!"
The other newcomers screamed and scattered as the horse charged at them.
/
Vance looked out from behind a minivan. "Alright, the coast looks clear."
He turned to Jasper, who was sitting there. "Why am I here?"
"I need a helping hand," Vance said. "You're kind of spineless, so you'll do perfect."
"Who said I'd help you?" Jasper asked.
"I figured you'd just be happy to just be included," Vance replied.
Jasper sighed. "I am. So what do you need me to do?"
"I'm going to need your help to wrangle ol' Tinfoil," Vance stated. "It's about time he and I ended this, once and for all."
"After Ignacio's win," Vance stated. "I officially became the only member of the final seven to not have won invincibility. That's why I've got to win it this time! I've got to prove myself! And no other challenge was made for me then this one."
Jasper frowned as he stood on the sidewalk...wearing a giant carrot suit. "Why am I doing this?"
"What do horses love?" Vance asked from behind a street corner.
"Oats?"
"Carrots!" Vance replied. "So when Tinfoil sees you in that getup he'll come running to get ya. But I've set up trip wires on both sides of you. When he comes, he'll fall and then...WHAM."
Vance pointed to a small piano dangling close above Jasper. The rope it was attached to lead to Vance's hand. "I'll knock him out cold. It's a full-proof plan."
"I've already thought of five problems with it," Jasper said.
"Shush! I think I hear Tinfoil."
Jasper's eyes grew wide. "Um, Vance…"
"Shhhhh…"
"But Vance-"
"What? What is so...the horse is behind me, isn't it?"
"No," Jasper replied. "It's above you."
Vance glanced above him to see Tinfoil standing on an anvil suspended by rope over Vance's head.
"Aw ****," Vance muttered.
The horse snorted, releasing the anvil. Jasper jumped back as Vance let go of the piano and it came crashing down. The horse skipped off of Vance and trotted down the street. Jasper flinched, but the horse didn't even acknowledge him as he walked off.
"Not even in this thing am I noticeable," Jasper sighed.
"Consider yourself lucky," Vance groaned. "Do me a favor and fetch a snow shovel. You're gonna need it to get me up."
/
In another part of Washington, Ness tiptoed down the street. She looked back and forth, before approaching a familiar series of storage warehouses.
"Rhonda mentioned she kept all the old challenge props in a warehouse," Ness stated. "I thought maybe it was one of the warehouses from the alien invasion challenge. I bet it has something I could use to capture that horse. Best of all, no one else will think to use it!"
Ness lifted the storage door to see Ignacio, Riley, and Melissa scrounging through Genesis's props.
Ness facepalmed. "Of all people, I should know not to tempt fate."
"Welcome to the horsepocalypse party Loch Ness," Riley said.
"I guess we all had the same idea," Ness sighed.
"Appears so," Ignacio said. "Except Vance and Jasper. Wherever they are…"
/
Jasper and Vance were painting the side of a building to look like a tunnel.
"Do you really think the horse will believe this is a tunnel?" Jasper asked.
"Not with that attitude," Vance replied. "Now put some pizzah in your art!"
/
"Probably something daring," Melissa stated. She was wearing gauze around her head.
"Are you alright Melissa?" Ness asked. "That horse hit you pretty hard."
"Thanks Ness, but I'm fine," Melissa giggled. "Just a teeny, weeny bit of internal bleeding is all."
"All?"
"Nothing a good cup of tea can't fix," the sweetheart replied.
Riley removed a tarp, revealing her go-kart.
"Aww sweet!" Riley stated. "The Autobrobile! I thought they'd scrap him for parts after the engine blew."
Ness looked through a few boxes. "Hmm. Now where are those tranq-"
She looked up as she heard the the sound of Melissa loading Jenny's giant tranquizller bazooka from the animal buddy challenge.
"Don't suppose you have any more tranq guns in there, do you?"
Melissa shook her head. "Sorry, I think animal control kept the others."
She threw the weapon into a bag containing the water guns and other weapons from the alien invasion. She started lacing skates from the roller derby challenge and threw a helmet over her head. "It's time for that horse to meet Mrs. Not The Nicest Guy Around."
"I'm sure he's quaking in his horseshoes," Ignacio said.
"Oh, well I don't want to scare the poor dear…"
"The aliens!" Ness stated. "Maybe I could use the animatronics too-"
"-Sorry Ness."
Ness turned to see Ignacio loading up two of the killer alien animatronics into their 'Hovercraft of Doom', which was actually a golf-cart.
"I believe I can repair these creatures to combat that insane ungulate," Ignacio replied. "These two are the only ones here sadly."
"That's fine," Ness sighed. "I'm sure I'll find something…"
Melissa skated away as Ignacio drove off. Riley saluted Ness, before pushing her still broken go-kart, filled with shot-puts from the first challenge's accuracy test.
Ness sighed and went back to rummaging. "There has to be something…"
/
Vance sighed with pride as he stepped back to admire their work; they had painted a tunnel with a crude drawing of Vance in it.
"Explain again how this works?" Jasper asked.
"The horse will charge at the painting," Vance explained. "Thinking it's a real tunnel with me in it. Instead he'll crash right into a wall. Then I'll tie him up!"
"Don't you think he'll know it's a building?" Jasper asked.
"He's just a dumb animal," Vance replied. "How smart can he be?"
Jasper's eyes widened. "Smart enough to operate heavy machinery."
"Huh?"
Jasper and Vance screamed and ducked as Tinfoil rode atop a swinging wrecking ball. Tinfoil neighed and threw back his mane as it destroyed their painting...and caved in the entire building. He jumped off and trotted away.
"He destroyed our masterpiece!" Vance cried out. "That's it! I'm madder than a boiled owl!"
Vance chased after a horse, who ran into a tunnel. Vance ran after him, only to run face first into a wall the tunnel was painted onto.
"I'll get another first aid kit," Jasper sighed.
/
Riley sighed as she finally pushed her-go kart to the Pentagram. "Finally. Let's see if anyone's home."
Riley knocked on a back door. "Yo Tobster, you here?"
"Riley?"
"Hey bro! How's it hanging?"
"We're trying to ration our leftover food," Toby replied. "What it is?"
"I wouldn't ask you this because it'd feel like cheating," Riley said. "But Rhonda said we could do whatever for the challenge. Do you think you can use your mad auto skills to help me?"
Toby sighed, but opened the door. "I guess. Jenny already let Melissa back in for whatever her plan is. You're the least annoying person in the hotel anyway."
"Aww, you're great too man," Riley replied.
"So what do you need?" Toby asked.
"I want to repair the Autobrobile," Riley stated.
"I think you'll need more than that to fight a horse," Toby said.
Riley smirked. "That's just the start. I figure that horse is like a monster from a monster movie. There's only one way to handle a monster destroying a city…"
/
In the city, Vance was wiring dynamite to a xylophone. "Now Jasper, let me explain my new plan!"
"Please don't."
"I have this xylophone rigged to explode when this note is hit," Vance said, pointing to a green bar. "While 'Those Endearing Young Charms' is open in a music book on the xylophone. Tinfoil will play it and hit that note. Then, boom! We got him!"
Jasper started walking away. "I can't watch…"
"Smart thinking," Vance said. "We should hide before Tinfoil rears his head…"
Vance grabbed Jasper's arm and pulled him behind a dumpster. "There he is now!"
Tinfoil trotted up and noticed the xylophone. He rolled his eyes. Grabbing a stick in his mouth, he began to play.
"He's actually doing it?" Jasper asked.
"I told ya!" Vance hooted. "When have I ever been wrong?"
"Do you want me to answer that?"
Just as Tinfoil was about to play the last note, he snickered. With a kick of his back legs he sent the xylophone flying...right into Vance and Jasper, pinning them against a wall.
"Ow."
"At least the dynamite didn't-"
Tinfoil tossed the mallet, landing it on the last note.
BOOM.
Vance and Jasper coughed up smoke.
"Ow. Again."
"I always hated that song," Vance sighed.
/
At the Pentagram, Ness climbed in through a window. "Ha! I hope I'm not too late. There's only problem with this. I need to...use the kitchen."
Ness kicked open the door and gulped; the oven and stove lit on fire, the plates began quaking, the sinks started overflowing and all the cabinet doors and drawers swung open and closed.
"I can do this! I have to! It's time to get baking...And maybe make a nice lunch too."
/
Meanwhile, Vance and Jasper were looting a costume store.
"Isn't this stealing?" Jasper asked.
"It's borrowing," Vance replied. "We'll return it after we capture that horse. It has to be here...ah-ha!"
Moments later, Jasper was in the back half of a zebra costume. "I actually miss the carrot outfit."
Vance was applying makeup to the horse's head. "There we go! With some eyelashes and lipstick, we're clearly a lady."
"Do I still have to wear pumps in this?" Jasper asked.
"Of course you have to wear pumps!" Vance shouted. "We want to seem classy."
"Can we not try and seduce Tinfoil as another horse," Jasper sighed.
"Zebra," Vance replied. "That way we'll be more exotic. We'll be so irresistible, he'll come down to us with guard off and then...wham! I'll knock him out."
Vance throw on the head and joined up with Jasper to form a poorly looking zebra. Vance adjusted their mane with his hoof. "Now let's strut our stuff Jasper!"
"I knew I should've stayed home today…"
/
On the streets, Tinfoil was stomping cars.
"Yoo-hoo!"
Tinfoil turns to see Vance and Jasper's zebra costume dancing. Tinfoil's jaw immediately drops. He whistled and ran over to the 'lady' equine. He nuzzled her nose...as Vance smacked him with a frying pan.
"Bullseye!"
Tinfoil fell to the ground...only to get right back up. He neighed with delight, taking the zebra into his arms. Vance tried to use the frying pan again, but Tinfoil snatched it and tosses it away. He then kissed the horse mask.
"Oh no…"
"For once I think your plan worked too well," Jasper sighed.
/
In a few minutes, the 'zebra' was wearing a wedding dressed and tied up to a fence pole. Tinfoil brayed at his new bride.
"Whelp, looks like we're marrying a horse Jasper," Vance stated.
"Vance!"
"Oh quit whining," Vance replied. "We'll get out of this. Worst case scenario we'll train our colts to help us."
"I haven't even had my first kiss," Jasper said.
Vance pouted, but threw off his mask. "Surprise my former steed; You've been duped! It was I, Vance, pretending to be a zebra. Also, Jasper's playing the butt."
"Thanks for remembering."
"So call the wedding off and surrender to my superior smarts," Vance stated.
Tinfoil stared...then shrugged.
"Uh oh," Vance said. "I don't think he cares."
"What?"
"He basically said 'oh well, nobody's perfect," Vance replied. "My sexiness truly is a gift and a curse!"
Tinfoil whinnied and grabbed the pole in his teeth.
"Pardon me Mr. Horse…"
The horse grunted. It turned around to see Melissa waving at him.
She was dressed in pink camo pants, her shirt sleeves now torn. She was still wearing the helmet and roller skates. A pink bandana was tied around her head. Strips of black were painted under eyes...along with face-paint in the shape of a heart. A bandolier of water guns was strapped to her chest, with more weapons on her back.
"...but are you ready for round two?"
"Melissa?" Vance asked. "What are you wearing?"
"Do you like it?" she asked. "I wanted to dress the part for the challenge. I even got an edgy, temporary tattoo!"
Melissa showed off a little gingerbread man on her left shoulder. It said 'Tough Cookie'.
The horse rolled his eyes, before stomping the ground.
"Vance is actually my friend, so I'd like if you please leave him alone," Melissa stated.
"Jasper's also here," Vance said.
"Oh," Melissa said. "Hi Jasper!"
"Hi."
The horse tossed his captives aside. He neighed and charged.
"How about you say hello to my little friend instead!"
Melissa cocked two water machine guns and started firing. The horse tripped as his front hoof was stuck in some sticky substance.
"I've loaded these guns with my super, secret recipe for extra thick tapioca pudding!" Melissa replied. "Even Vance needs five minutes to finish chewing it."
"I told ya I just hadn't stretched my jaws yet!"
"Now say hello to another one of my little friends…"
Melissa whipped out the tranquilizer bazooka and started blasting. "Rarrrrrrrrr!"
The horse brayed; using its back hoofs, he deflected every tranq dart like he was using kung-fu. Melissa looked down to see three tranq darts in her leg. "Not again."
Melisa fell to the ground as her legs gave out. The horse, finally freeing his hoof, trotted over to Melissa. With a gentle shove and a sadistic grin, it sent Melissa rolling down the streets. "Ahhhhhhh! I should have made more pudding…"
The horse picked up his captured bride again.
"Melissa!" Vance shouted. "Noooooo! ...Did she really not have anymore pudding for me?"
The horse was about to leave, but froze. A familiar, metallic growl echoed.
The horse was suddenly rushed as a one of the Invaders tackled him into a building.
From the roof of building, Ignacio moved the controls of the animatronic while watching through propped up binoculars. "I hope no one minds if I bring some science fiction to this western."
Around the corner, the other alien held a muzzle in its stinger tail. It launched, but Tinfoil tossed his head back and forth. Ignacio sighed, trying to move the controller to match the horse's sporadic movements.
The horse finally bucked free of the other alien. He dashed off, swishing his tail to tease the Invaders. They tried to circle him once more.
"That's it," Ignacio muttered. We're closing in…"
Tinfoil didn't move as the Invaders got closer. As they were just within tail's distance, he stepped aside to reveal a fire hydrant beside him.
"Oh no," Ignacio muttered.
With another kick of his back legs, the horse freed the hydrant. Water started gushing and sprayed the lead Invader. It short-circuited in seconds.
The horse turned and tackled the other Invader. He pulled it into the water by its tail, before kicking it into the sky.
Ignacio gulped. "So much for that plan. At least I'm safe up…"
Ignacio watched as Tinfoil winked at him. The model looked up to see the second Invader crashing down on him. He sighed as it shocked him.
Tinfoil snorted.
"This is insane!" Jasper yelled. "Can nothing stop this horse?"
"I can't!"
The horse turned to see Ness standing there, forcing a smile. She already looked roughed up, with a new black eye and gauze all around her. She held out a carrot cake.
"I thought I'd make a peace offering," Ness said. "A carrot cake just for you! Oats too. I know I can't beat you, but I can respect you. So what do you say? Every wedding needs a cake, right?"
Tinfoil smiled...then stomped on Ness' cake.
"You knew that was a trap, huh?" Ness sighed.
The horse headbutted Ness into a gutter. He looked around, waiting for someone to step out.
"Anyone else left to save us?" Jasper asked.
A tumbleweed blew by.
The horse smirked and grabbed the pole again...only to sigh at the sound of honking.
"Sorry I'm late dudes," Riley yelled out. "My ride was in the shop."
Riley drove up in her Autobrobile and shot a finger gun at Vance.
"That's it?" Vance asked. "A car? Tinfoil stomps on cars for fun!"
Riley smirked. "Like I told Toby, this horse is a monster attacking a city and there's only one way to fight a monster…"
Riley pressed a button in her kart. It shook and started shifting...until it became a fighting robot. It was a few feet taller than Tinfoil and looked similar to Riley herself.
"...is with a giant robot. Allow me to introduce; The Bro-bot!"
Even the horse's eyes widened at this, but he quickly took a charging position.
"Bring it pachyderm," Riley teased.
The horse bolted towards Riley. Pressing another button, cannons appeared out of Brobot's eyes. They fired shot put balls, but Tinfoil dodged them. He jumped into the air, flipping and preparing a back kick.
Riley blocked and punched the horse into a dump.
"That all you got?" Riley asked.
The horse brayed and charged again. Riley swung, but the horse ducked and slide under her. It jumped on the robot's head and began stomping on it.
"I don't think so!"
Brobot charged forward, then suddenly halted. The horse was flung off, but landed on his hooves. The robot ran towards the horse, preparing to tackle him, but the horse jumped out of the way. He sneered at Riley.
Tinfoil charged at Riley again. They traded blows, from fists to hoofs like a kung-fu movie. Both panted as they stared each other down.
"Impressive Tinfoil," Riley stated. "But this ends now."
Brobot held out its arm; a giant net fired from it. Tinfoil tried to jump, but the net overtook him. Riley pressed another button and the arm fired off like a rocket. It launched the horse straight into a fountain. Tinfoil tried to stand, but slumped. He closed its eyes.
"YES!" Riley cheered. "That's what I'm talking about!"
"Dang!" Vance cried. "I have to admit that mighty impressive."
"Can we get out of this costume now?" Jasper asked.
/
Riley maneuvered her robot over to the fountain. It reached for its arm, but Tinfoil suddenly sprang up. Grabbing the arm in his mouth, he started punching Brobot over and over again with it.
"This horse doesn't know when to quit," Riley sighed.
Tinfoil tossed the arm aside and head butted the battle bot into a street lamp. Brobot got to its feet, but the lamp came crashing on top of it, crushing its legs.
"Crap," Riley stated. "I'm stuck. I can't break free!"
"You get use to it," Vance sighed.
Holding his head high, Tinfoil trotted away. He sniffed the air and stopped. He followed the scent to a paper bag. From inside he pulled out a grilled cheese.
"Don't," Ness cried out from the gutter. "That's my lunch. I actually made it myself."
The horse smirked and picked up the sandwich in its mouth.
"You don't want to do that," Ness said. "Please."
Tinfoil threw the sandwich up the air, catching it in his mouth and swallowing it whole. He licked his lips and turned his head to Ness. However, he stumbled as ihe tried to walk away.
"I told you didn't want to do that," Ness said.
Tinfoil gave out a soft neigh as it tried to stand, but fell to the ground again. Ness smirked now, walking over to the horse.
"I did find something in that warehouse," Ness stated. "The sleeping pills from the Awake-a-thon specifically. I figured you'd see through the cake, but be petty enough to eat my lunch. So I grounded them all up and baked them into...you're asleep already, huh?"
Tinfoil was snoozing, past out on the ground.
/
Soon animal control arrived. Tinfoil had been strapped to a table and had a Hannibal Lecter-style muzzle on his face. The newcomers and hosts stood around as they prepared to haul him off.
"Thank goodness you Total Drama folks were able to stop that rampage," an officer said. "We still don't know how this horse got here."
"Yup, sure is a mystery," Vance said with a forced smile.
"We were just innocent bystanders who wanted to set a good example for the kids at home," Rhonda said. "With no connection to this incident or alternative motives."
"I think I'm going to gag," Riley whispered.
Ness watched Tinfoil as he gave her the stink eye. "Hold on it minute, look at his upper left hoof. It's inflamed!"
Ness bent down, trying to move the hoof. Tinfoil neighed loudly, but couldn't move as Ness pulled something out of his hoof.
Suddenly, Tinfoil's whole body calmed. It neighed happily and stuck its tongue out to lick Ness' face.
"Hehe," Ness giggled. "I think this stone had become trapped in his hoof! It was causing him pain every time it walked. He may even have a serious infection from that being lodged in there."
"You mean it almost destroyed all of Washington, D.C. because it had a rock in his foot?" Riley asked. "That...sounds legit. I'd be the same way if a rock was in my shoe."
"Thank goodness Ness wants to be a veterinarian," Melissa sighed.
"I think this horse maybe the first animal that actually likes her," Ignacio whispered.
"Wait a minute," Jasper said. "That's not a rock! That's a rhinestone."
Vance yanked it from Ness' hands. "Oh yeah! I've been looking for this ever since it fell off my belt! Uh, I mean I've never seen this before, or that horse…"
"What's going to happen to Tinfoil now?" Ness asked. "You're not going to lock him in a cell forever are you?"
"Don't be ridiculous," the officer laughed. "We only do that to people. Tinfoil will be released to an animal sanctuary, where wild horses roam. That way he'll never bother people again."
The officer turned and glared at Vance. "Or be bothered by people…"
"I'm just glad this is all over," Ignacio sighed.
"Yeah, luckily there aren't any other wild animals or creatures running around Washington," the officer said.
Flashback to the first challenge:
"Now," Rhonda says. "The first part of your challenge is to get to Lincoln Memorial while staying ahead of the obstacles."
"Obstacles?" Hayden asked.
Rhonda snapped her fingers. Two crates fell from the ceiling, shaking and echoing screams. Out of the crates came, a rhino, a lion, a tiger, a bear (oh my), a shark, a murder of crows, a mass of scarabs, a chainsaw wielding maniac, a chicken, Jenny and Toby on an ATV, a grandma, an animatronic dinosaur, a hipster, a monster truck, a komodo dragon, a mouse, a skunk, a vulture, a large tortoise, a girl scout, a wooly mammoth beaver, a wildebeest stampede and the Brady Bunch.
"Ah yes," Hayden replied, "those obstacles. Well, thank you for clearing that up and, EVERYONE RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!"
The contestants bolted out as the 'obstacles' chased after them.
…
Bethany and Ness turned around to see citizens being terrorized by the obstacles, running for their lives.
"Oops," Rhonda said, "we should have had a plan to wrangle them back up…Eh."
End of flashback
"Yup," Rhonda said. "Nothing else running around terrorizing Washington. Anyway, congratulations to Ness for her second win! She wins the luxury suite, invincibility, and an advantage at the next challenge! The rest of you get the satisfaction of trying hard and getting nothing."
"Like this show with viewers," Jenny added.
"Prepare for elimination tonight," Rhonda continued. "We're finally headed to the final five!"
Vance sighed. "I am glad that Tinfoil is taken care of, it's a huge burden off of my back. But...I don't know...I feel like I've been trying this whole time to catch that dang horse. I learned how to read to make better traps. I felt like this challenge had been what it had all been building towards...and I failed. Ain't that a kick in the pants."
The newcomers gathered at the Haunted Internet Cafe.
"Tonight's blend is a mocha made with real horse's milk," Rhonda said. "Don't ask us how we got it. The first coffee cup goes to Ness."
The jinx smiled and caught her cup.
"Then...Melissa and Jasper."
Melissa's cup bounced off her; she was once again strapped to a board while tranquizlied. Jasper barely registered his cup.
"And Riley…"
The bro seemed to be about to pass-out.
"And the final coffee cup goes to…"
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"...Ignacio. Sorry Vance; it's the end of the line."
Vance slumped in the seat and sighed. "Wow. I...I can't believe it. Why me? Was I an easy target? Or y'all just didn't like me?"
"It's not that," Jasper said. "It...well…"
"They saw you as a threat," Melissa quickly said.
"Wait, really?" Vance asked.
"Of...course we did," Ness added. "You were too big a threat to keep around."
Melissa nodded at Ignacio and Riley.
"How?" Vance asked.
"Well," Riley said. "You were the one who orchestrated Tessa's blindside."
"And you were so close to winning the challenge," Jasper added. "If you tried that hard at the next few, you could have done an immunity run and gotten to the end."
"You were targeting me," Ignacio said. "That's dangerous to my game. I had to get you before you would've gotten me."
"I was trying to," Vance stated. "I guess I was the biggest threat left after all."
"Yup," Ness said.
"Clearly," Ignacio agreed.
"I wouldn't want to go against you in the final 2," Riley said.
"That's why you're the Bucking Bronco," Jasper stated.
Vance smiled, standing proudly. "I'll probably go down as the most robbed player in history. I was so close too."
Riley, Ignacio, Jasper and Ness, all tired, scratched up, and bandaged shared a look.
"I mean Vance did send Tessa home," Riley said. "But I'm more upset with Melissa than him. Yet I couldn't help but vote for him…"
"Vance was one of the last Molting Eagles," Ignacio admitted. "I knew our previous collaboration was temporary; Vance still had it out for me. Why else am I in the bottom 2? But more than that…"
"...It was the horse," Jasper said. "We spent all day being tormented and attacked because Vance brought that horse…"
"Vance didn't mean to ravage most of Washington, D.C.," Ness stated. "But he did and we had to spend all day dealing with it. It just seemed fair to vote for him. Sorry Vance."
Melissa stood up and hugged her old teammate. "I'm so sorry Vance. I tried to get the votes but-"
"-It couldn't be helped," Vance interrupted. "I couldn't not make myself a big target. I was too good! You know that's always been my biggest flaw."
Melissa giggled. "Of course."
In her ear Vance whispered, "Besides, I'm glad it was me over you. I think those Fireworks have regrouped. You can take the newcomer out of the teams, but you can't take the teams out the newcomers. You follow?"
Melissa nodded. "I'll be careful. I promise to do our team proud as the last Molting Eagle."
Vance patted her on the head. "You already have."
/
Outside, the other newcomers and hosts gathered as Vance prepared to take his leave.
Melissa handed him a dish wrapped in tinfoil. "I was hoping I wouldn't have to give you this, but I baked you a cake to go, it's-.
Vance burped. "Delicious! Thanks Melissa! I'm going to miss your cooking. And you."
Melissa smiled. "I'm going to miss your burps."
I've had a good ol' time," Vance admitted. "I even learned a lot about myself. I may not come from the best place, but that don't matter; I'm still a champion."
Vance turned to everyone and waved his hat. "Alright, I'm going. It's really anyone's game now! So I expect all y'all to be fighting like ducks in a chicken coop! Melissa, don't be down on yourself. Ness, don't let your luck hold you back. Jasper, be more confident. Riley, stay chill. And for pete's sake, tell her already Iggy!"
Ignacio blushed. "Really? Even Vance realizes it?"
"Realizes what?" Ness asked.
Riley face palmed.
"Now I've got some old friends to see," Vance stated. "See y'all around."
Vance ran and jumped on top of large, black horse. He tipped his hat at the others and cried out one last, "Yeehaw!"
Then Vance rode off into the sunset.
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"Hey...when did Vance get a new horse?" Jasper asked.
Everyone's eyes widened as they ran back into the hotel.
Author's Note
A relatively short chapter this time around. Honestly, from here until the finale the chapters will probably shorter in comparison to the others. That's just what happens when you have less than a handful of competitors left.
I'm not sure when I decided that catching the horse would be a challenge, but probably early on. That's why Tinfoil and his rampage kept getting mentioned. I knew I wanted to make it a challenge and it be the challenge that Vance was eliminated at. This really is a chapter dedicated to Vance and ending that subplot.
Readers have pointed out that Vance is very under the radar. He makes it far, but doesn't have as much focus. I didn't honestly realize this while writing, but rereading it was noticeable. It definitely wasn't intentional. I think Vance just always stuck out in my head, so he got the short stick. But it also makes sense. Vance was originally going to be an early out. His story was simple; he tells obvious and inconsistent lies. Finally someone confronts him about it, and he admits the truth. But he's voted off, probably for screwing up a big challenge.
But early on, Vance became a favorite of readers. I also really enjoyed writing him and decided to expand his role. He's really fun, a butt monkey type character. Plus, I love his southern sayings. Eventually, he was too fun and I thought of his relative confronting him at the merge. So he had to make it that far. Then things kind of played out for him to stay longer. Maybe he should've gone home sooner, but I loved him this chapter and I enjoyed his presence.
As for the challenge itself, it was fun. Vance and Jasper's Looney Tunes antics was a fun tribute, inspired by the fact Vance basically looks like Yosemite Sam. The callbacks to previous challenges were fun. I liked Melissa and Riley's way of confronting the horse. In hindsight, I feel really bad Vance didn't win. It's a silly chapter, but it has this sad undercurrent to me with Vance and his fate. Still, I like Ness' method of winning and proving herself.
We've reached our final five! Anyone, who hasn't read spoilers, have any predictions on the winner?
Next time, something I've planned from the start of the story...
Appendix: Elimination History
Bethany (Eagles)- 22nd
Diamonique (Eagles)- RETURNED
Jasper (Fireworks)- RETURNED
Tessa (Fireworks)- RETURNED
Zipporah (Fireworks)- 21st
Hayden (Eagles)- 20th
Frannie (Eagles)- 19th
Aiden (Eagles)- 18th
Pascal (Fireworks)- 17th
Easton (Fireworks)- 16th
Seraphina (Fireworks)- 15th
MERGE
Cynthia- 14th
Griswold- 13th
Xidorn- 12th
Diamonique- 11th
Lita- 10th
Weston- 9th
Kalino- 8th
Tessa- 7th
Vance- 6th