The newcomers sat in the cafeteria, enjoying some lunch.
Riley sat next to Jasper whispering, as Ness told a story to Ignacio at the other end. Melissa hummed inside the kitchen, before bringing out sandwiches.
Melissa took a seat next to Riley. Riley raised an eyebrow, nodding at Jasper. Jasper walked off.
"I hope I'm not interrupting," Melissa stated.
"Nah, just shooting the breeze," Riley said. "You need something, Mel?"
"I just felt like we needed to talk," Melissa admitted. "I'm worried you're still mad about Tessa's elimination."
Riley shrugged. "It's no biggie. You just betrayed the alliance you formed. I'm over it."
Melissa gulped. "I appreciate that, and you have every right to be mad."
"But I'm totally not though," Riley replied.
"Uh huh," Melissa said. "Well, if you still wanted to make the girl's alliance work we can! I respect you and I love Ness. So how about an all female final three?"
Riley tapped her chin in thought. "That's definitely a thing we could do. We do have the numbers over the guys. We could have also done a female final four when we had the numbers over the guys. There's a lot of options really…"
"I feel so sleazy," Melissa admitted. "No offense to anyone who happens to sleaze of course. I just felt so rude trying to make peace...and make a final 3 deal. With poor Vance's undeserved elimination, I'm the sole Eagle left. And maybe I'm being paranoid, but I think Riley might still be mad at me."
"I'm way mad at her," Riley stated. "Melissa's offer was cute, but I already told Iggy we're going the distance. Me, him, Ness, and Jasper can form a Fizzled Fireworks final four. Ha, I bet Gris would be happy to hear that…"
"Hey Jasper!"
Jasper looked back. Ness and Ignacio waved at him.
"What's up?"
"You wanna finish lunch with us?" Ignacio asked. "Ness was just telling me about Total Drama's original third season. Total Drama: The Musical…"
"Total Drama World Tour," Ness corrected. "Rumor is they changed the name in post-production."
"Oh man," Jasper said, "I love the third season! I mean the first is probably one of my faves."
"That's what Ness said," Igncio stated. "It's her favorite. How have I never seen this show?"
The first day in the subway," Jasper said, "Jenny admitted I only got cast cause they thought my older brother was auditioning. ...that stung. I don't know what's worse; the reason I'm here is to be fodder or there is no reason I'm here. It's just an accident. But maybe it was a happy accident? I'm just really glad I'm here and that now everyone seems to know me… I feel like somebody. It's a new feeling."
"Attention newcomers," Rhonda announced over the P.A. "Finish your lunch and meet us at the old opera house downstairs in thirty! Have we got something for you."
"Is that a good something or a bad something?" Ignacio asked.
"When has it been good," Riley teased.
"Only one way to find out," Jasper admitted.
/
The newcomers soon took their seats in the auditorium. Rhonda, Jenny, and Toby stood in front of the closed and still singed curtains.
"Curtains closed," Ness whispered. "Means some kind of reveal."
"Maybe it'll be a fun challenge?" Melissa asked. "Or safe? Like stamp licking?"
Rhonda cleared her throat, silencing the girls. "Thank you. Now, today's plans were originally going to be different. Before our unexpected third returnee, we were going to have the losing newcomers compete in a challenge to return at the final five. But we don't have time for that now."
The final five sighed in relief.
"In hindsight, having someone return with only a few eliminations before the finale might not be that satisfying for the fans," Rhonda admitted, "...but what we have today is even more exciting!"
"More exciting?" Ness asked, before gulping.
Rhonda beamed. "It's been a long time in the making. After several failed attempts to get it to happen, we've finally gotten a certain special guest to appear!"
"Forget Teresa, or that Mandy Cucumber and her friend what's his name," Jenny said. "This celebrity guest puts those D-list losers in their place! It's the one, the only…"
The newcomers turned as the curtains parted...and no one was there. They stood there looking.
Riley scratched her head. "So, uh…"
Suddenly, a ton of spotlights shone at the middle of the stage. A three-tiered platform burst out of the ground. At the top was a handsome teen, with jet black gelled hair. He wore a button down red shirt, all the buttons undone to better reveal his tanned and chiseled abs, and tight jeans. He flashed a smile with his perfect white teeth and winked.
"...Blainerson McManly!"
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Ness squealed. Her mouth started foaming.
"You have to be kidding me," Jasper sighed.
Melissa clapped. "Wonderful entrance Mr. McManly."
"He's not that big a deal," Ignacio said.
"Careful Iggy, you're turning green with envy," Riley said.
Blainerson backflipped off the top onto the stage. "Thanks for that wonderful introduction…"
He looked down at something written at his hand. "Ron-Duh. It's great to be on the show. I'd say I've watched it, but then I'd be lying."
"How did you get an actual famous person on this show?" Riley asked.
"He expressed interest to us in appearing," Rhonda said. "Our schedules just never lined up."
"So he was too busy to make an appearance," Ignacio whispered.
"Why did you want us to meet him at the mall?" Melissa asked. "Just trying to force the cameo?"
"Mall?" Blainerson asked.
"Not important," Rhonda said. "What is important is that you're here, famous teen idol that young people are crazy for! And you have some exciting news!"
"That I do," Blainerson stated. "This show's network wants me to host my own game show next Fall. And I said...yes!"
Blainerson flashed a smile. Everyone stared as he stood there, still smiling.
"So you're here...because?" Melissa asked.
"Oh yeah," Blainerson said. "To prepare for my new show, I'll be hosting your challenge."
"Really?" Jasper asked.
"I know, it's exciting," Blainerson admitted, winking at the newcomers again.
Ness swooned, falling against Ignacio. "Oh Iggy, isn't Blainerson just like...the hottest guy ever?"
Ignacio rolled his eyes.
"The one time I wouldn't mind being seen as super attractive," Ignacio said, "I couldn't be more invisible to Ness than...um...Jasper is to most people."
"The challenge will be based on my new game show."
"Please be about going on a date," Ness whispered. "Please, please, please…"
"So get ready for, 'Untitled Project'..."
Blainerson paused dramatically, then turned to Rhonda. "We haven't decided on a title, but it's coming. Just digitally insert it later, kay?"
"You got it," Rhonda said. "If you need anything, we'll be backstage. You're killing it!"
"I know," he replied. "Somebody arrest me before it becomes a massacre. Haha, get it? Cause I'm killing it."
"Ooh, I do get it," Ness said.
Jasper rolled his eyes.
/
The trio of hosts moved backstage.
"I can't believe we actually got him!" Rhonda whispered.
"Our ratings will soar through the roof!" Jenny cheered.
"Better than that," Rhonda said. "Blainerson's game show is premiering in the network's fall lineup; that means our second season will be airing in the same block! His popularity will give us viewers!"
"Does anyone remember how he contacted us?" Toby asked.
"Who cares?" Jenny replied. "We got him!"
/
Blainerson clapped his hands; the stage suddenly shifted into a colosseum-like arena. Blainerson's grinning face was in the center, in a closed-off area. Blainerson overlooked everyone in a golden throne on top of a raised platform. A matching silver throne sat next to him.
On the arm of his throne, there was a jar with cards in it.
Blainerson winked at the camera. "The way this works is simple. Each round, I'll randomly select a competition from this jar. You'll all vote for one person to compete in it. Whoever this unlucky soul is picks their opponent. Then it's a head to head competition! We'll do this until only one is left standing."
The newcomers shrugged.
"Great! Love the enthusiasm, but also the nerves."
Blainerson looked down at the writing on his hands. "Now then, is there a… Ness?"
"OH MY GOD HE SAID MY NAME!" Ness cried out, fainting on top of Ignacio.
"Is that them?" Blainerson asked.
"I thought meeting Pascal and Andre was cool," Ness admitted. "But actually meeting my favorite musician? While competing at the final five on my favorite TV show? I don't think I've ever been this lucky! The world will probably balance it out so...I'll probably end up dead by tomorrow. Still, worth it!"
"You've won an advantage for this challenge," Blainerson explained. "So you'll be immune for this first round. For your pleasure, take a seat next to me."
"GRHERDRRRRBBBDRRRRR," Ness mumbled as she stumbled next to Blainerson and took a seat in the silver throne.
"Do you have a medical condition I should know about?" Blainerson asked.
"I just can't believe I'm actually meeting you," Ness giggled. "You hair is even more perfectly quaffed in person."
"Thank you," Blainerson replied. "I get that more often than most people. You're pretty cute yourself. Especially for a girl with braces."
"Heehee thanks...I think?"
"I thought this was Total Drama not The Blainerson Show," Jasper said. "Can we get on with it?"
"The Blainerson Show?" Blainerson asked. "Ooh! That would be a great name for the game show starring me, Blainerson. That's why we'd call it the Blainerson Show..."
"I can't believe you, you-," Jasper sighed.
"-I know, I'm unbelievable," Blainerson replied. "but we need to get on with it. So for the first challenge…"
Blainerson drew a card. He raised his eyebrows. "This challenge is all about one thing; brains. Now under each of your chairs you'll find...an autographed picture of me! And also a PDA; use it to vote for who you want to compete!"
Everyone reached under their seats. Only Ness actually went for the autographed photo. Eventually, everyone voted.
A cue card printed out from the other arm of Blainerson's throne. "And our first loser is...Ignacio."
Riley smirked and rubbed her hands together. "This is perfect! The goal is to make sure Melissa loses the challenge; then we can vote all vote her off. That's why Iggy had to be chosen. He can pick Melissa, and with his brains he'll win for sure! It's fool-proof!"
Ignacio stood at the stage. Ness winked at him, causing him to blush.
"Alright Ignacio," Blainerson said. "Whose going to be your opponent?"
"I chose...Riley."
"Ha, ha, ha...what?" Riley asked.
Riley was pulled up to the stage by interns and plopped next to Ignacio.
"What gives dude?" she whispered. "Why not someone we want to lose?"
"Sorry Ry," Ignacio replied. "But I need another invincibility win."
"And maybe impress Ness with it," Ignacio admitted.
"I just wanted my victory to be certain."
"Fine," Riley said. "Wait a minute...certain? What are you trying to say?"
Ignacio forced a smile. "Well, uh…"
"Enough chit chat," Blainerson said. "Let's get to your competition!"
From underneath stage, two sleek conveyor belts surfaced on the left and right side. A lever connected to the two belts also surfaced next to Blainerson.
An intern moved Riley and Ignacio to opposite sides. Each had a bib tied around their neck and a fork and knife placed in their hands.
"What's going on?" Ignacio asked.
"Right?" Riley said. "When did we get this many interns?"
"Round one is all brains," Blainerson explained. "Specifically, it's all about eating brains. Welcome to Brain Apetit!"
"I regret this," Ignacio sighed.
"Oh, you will," Riley said.
"My personal chefs have baked bunches of brains for your dining experience," Blainerson explained. "We'll be serving them via conveyor belt. The first to let a brain drop loses."
Blainerson flipped the lever. Slowly, a small, steaming mass of grey matter came out of the conveyor belt.
Ignacio cut off a chunk and forced it down. "Well, it wasn't that bad."
Riley tossed aside her silverware. With one hand she picked up the brain and took a bite. "Mmm! Taste like smarts."
The quickly finished eating.
"How were those monkey brains?" Blainerson asked.
Ignacio shrugged. "Eh."
Riley burped. "Honestly? Give your chefs a pay raise dude."
Blainerson frowned. "I was hoping you'd be more disgusted."
"This isn't the first gross meal we've had," Riley replied.
"It was the most well made though," Ignacio said.
"If it makes you feel better I'm disgusted," Melissa admitted, covering her eyes.
He pushed the lever further. The belt sped up. Out came smaller brains. Ignacio and Riley popped them into their mouths.
"Don't worry," Blainerson said. "Squirrel is just the appetizer. We also have goat brain soup to go with your meal.
Ignacio and Riley were already chugging the soup by the bowl.
Blainerson gritted his teeth. He swung the lever, far as it would go. Fish brains flew out. Ignacio rushed to stuff his mouth. Riley just sat at the end of the belt, catching them in her mouth before they fell off.
Melissa finally ran up out of her seat, her face ripened green.
"Ugh," Ignacio groaned, holding his stomach.
"Give up Iggy!" Riley said in-between bites.
"Never," Ignacio whined, still trying to fill his face.
As he did, he dropped a brain that immediately speed off the belt. "Aww ****."
"We have a winner!" Blainerson said.
"Woo!" Riley cheered, tossing another brain and catching it in her mouth.
/
Melissa returned to her seat, clearing her throat. "Please tell me it's over."
"It's over alright," Ignacio sighed, taking his seat.
"Sorry Iglesias, but Riley won," Blainerson said.
"It's Ignacio," Ness corrected.
"It sure is," Blainerson said. "Now I need you to leave. For winning round one, Riley is exempt from competing in round two and can sit in the throne."
"Sweet!" Riley said, jumping into the seat.
She offered Blainerson a brain. "Want some?"
"I'll pass."
Riley shrugged. "Suit yourself."
The next competition is about having a need for speed," Blainerson said. "Now everyone but Igesias can vote for the next competitor."
In under a minute, the results were in. "And the next competitor is...Jasper!"
Blainerson tapped his chin. "Jasper? Hmm...why does that sound familiar?"
Jasper walked up to the stage. "Really? Really? You still haven't recognized me?"
"Wait a minute," Blainerson said. "Jasper?"
"Yeah, it's me," Jasper said.
"You two know each other?" Melissa asked.
Jasper hung his head and sighed. "Yes. Blainerson McManly...is my older brother."
Everyone gasped.
/
"Ooh yeah," Jenny said from behind the curtain. "That's how we got in contact with Blainerson."
"How could we forget Blainerson and Jagger were related?" Rhonda asked.
The co-hosts shrugged.
/
"Why didn't you tell us?" Melissa asked.
"You haven't told anyone I'm your brother?" Blainerson asked. "That's the first thing I'd tell people if I were you."
Jasper glared. "I had my reasons."
"Of course I don't tell people my brother's famous," Jasper said. "Either it makes me even more invisible, or people only remember me for my brother. They pretend to like me...just to meet him. For once I was finally making a name for myself, being remembered for who I was. Now everyone watching and competing will only remember me as Blainerson's brother."
"What are you doing here bro?" Blainerson asked.
"I've been competing on Total Drama," Jasper said. "Remember, it's my favorite show?"
"Uhh..."
"You crashed my audition tape?"
"Um…"
"You drove me to the airport."
"Recently?"
"I've been here for over two months," Jasper stated. "Didn't you notice I was gone?"
"It was kind of quiet at home," Blainerson said. "That's not different than when you're there though, haha. Guess I'll tell Mom and Dad I've seen you, huh?"
Jasper sighed. "Why I am surprised?"
"It's nice to see you doing something for once Jasper," Blainerson said. "Good luck bro, but I do have to be impartial. So, who will you compete against?"
"I don't know...," Jasper said.
Riley winked at Jasper.
"Melissa for totally random reasons…"
Melissa smiled and skipped up to the stage. "I think I can handle a race!"
"Sorry Melisandre," Blainerson stated. "But it's not you who needs speed."
Melissa and Jasper shared a look.
/
In the Pentagram's courtyard interns had reconstructed the set. Even...especially the thrones were present, Blainerson's looking a little bigger than before. Everyone gathered around it.
In the center was centrifugal ride, with a circular platform connected to a motor. Riders were strapped to the cage-like wall as it spun at high speeds. This ride had a radioactive waste sign on it, with a design not unlike something from a post-apocalyptic wasteland.
"This Round-Up ride is called the Pukeclear Reactor," Blainerson explained. "It was decommissioned for failing safety standards, but my staff...or your staff, sorry, fixed it. So now it barely passes the safety standards."
"I'd be lying if I didn't expect that," Melissa sighed.
"This thing will slowly increase in speed until it reaches Zero Gs," Blainerson continued. "Whoever can survive longest without ralphing wins."
The two newcomers rushed inside the ride.
"This'll be easy!" Jasper said. "With Melissa's stomach, I've got this in the bag."
"I wouldn't be so sure," Melissa replied.
"No offense, but my stomach beat you in the stamina challenge before."
"That's true...but you're forgetting I just threw up; I have an empty stomach. It'll take a lot for me to lose it again...maybe enough time for you to lose yours."
Jasper's eyes grew wide as the ride started.
"You having fun?" Blainerson called.
"Actually, yes!" Melissa cheered. "Thank you for asking Mr. Blainerson!"
Blainerson pouted as he threw yet another lever, turning up the speed.
"Wheeeeeeee!" Melissa squealed.
"Aw crap," Riley groaned as Jasper's stomach already started rumbling.
"Truth was my stomach was feeling it already," Melissa admitted. "I just hoped I could psych Jasper out. Riley is not being subtle about what she's doing..."
Riley pouted as she took another bite of her brain...before smirking. She started chewing loudly, with her mouth wide open. "I think they're reaching Zero Gs!"
Melissa turned her head. "I know what you're trying Riley; it won't work."
"Fine, I guess Melissa wins the rematch," Riley announced loudly. "Say, does anyone remember how Jasper beat Melissa in that endurance contest? Jasper? What was it?"
"We had to drink…" Jasper said, while taking deep breaths, "Jenny and Toby's nasty smoothie."
"Oh yeah! It was rank! What was in it again?"
"Pigeon poop," Jasper replied. "Fresh maggots...old man sweat…"
Melissa's face turned artichoke green, but Jasper's face was already avocado green.
"Wait, you're saying Jasper won something?" Blainerson asked. "Are you sure you weren't mistaking him for someone else? That's what usually happens with me."
"Are you kidding?" Jasper asked. "It...it was the first challenge I won on the show...It wasn't even just that stuff either...there was...black licorice."
Everyone let out a gasp, Riley even coughing up brain bits on the floors.
"Black licorice?" Blainerson asked. "Seriously? That's crossing a line."
"Uhhh," Melissa groaned, shivering. "I'm...not...giving...up…"
"The main ingredient was chunks," Jasper recalled. "Chunks of...uh...baby roaches?"
Melissa's eyes lit up as she finally vomited.
"Woo!" Jasper cheered. "Victory!"
Melissa vomit splashed back on to him.
"...I'm still counting this as a win," he said.
"Oh my gosh!" Melissa cried. "If any of my little roach babies are watching, I'm so sorry! I completely forgot I drank cockroach in the first challenge. I didn't eat y'all because you were alive, and it was too late for those dears. Ohh…"
"Wooooo Pastor Jasper!" Riley cheered.
"Jasper actually won?" Blainerson asked. "Good thing I'm not a betting man. Congrats on your first victory bro."
"Were you missing the part where I beat Melissa before?" Jasper asked. "I've actually won three chall-"
"That's nice Jasper," Blainerson said. "But we need to move on. You can take a seat up here."
"I'll pass," Jasper said.
"Aww, he's still camera shy," Blainerson said.
"Camera shy?" Jasper asked. "I'm on a tele-"
"-He's so camera shy he always skips our family Christmas card photo," Blaineron teased.
"We have a family Christmas photo?"
"Yeah, since forever. Did you never know?"
Jasper sighed and slunk to his seat.
"It looks like we're at round three," Blainerson said. "With Jasper safe for winning the last challenge and Melissandre eliminated, that means Ness and Rosey have to be in the next event. I hope you enjoy heights."
"I don't," Ness sighed.
"Does anyone?" Riley asked.
/
Ness and Riley were strapped into a harness attached to balloons; yellow for Ness, red for Riley. All the balloons had Blainerson's face on it. The two floated over a large pool of water. The balloons were just enough they floated off the ground but not any farther in the air, with the girls acting as anchors in the harness.
"This challenge is Balloon Lagoon," Blainerson said. "In your harness pockets, you'll find darts and a blowgun. You-"
"-Have to pop the other person's balloons?" Riley asked.
"And the loser falls into the lagoon?" Ness continued.
Blainerson crossed his arms. "You know the host is supposed to explain stuff. Not the...challenge doers."
Ness frowned. "Sorry…"
"It was pretty self explanatory," Ignacio stated.
"Let's just start the head to head," Blainerson said, clapping his hands.
The two girls nodded and raced to get out their blowguns.
Ness was first and fired. Her dart launched...a foot before sinking into the pool.
"Nice try Loch Ness," Riley said, "But it's my turn now."
Ness tried to swim through the air, barely avoiding Riley's dart. She launched another dart straight at Riley. The dart flipped...bouncing backwards off Riley's balloon and straight into Ness'.
"Really?" the jinx asked. As one balloon popped, she sank slightly lower.
/
As the challenge proceeded, Blainerson had interns touch up his hair off-screen.
Ignacio sighed. "How can I compete with him?"
"You can't compete dear," Melissa said, "you lost."
"Thanks for the reminder," Ignacio replied.
"I think he was talking about Blainerson," Jasper said. "You know, for Ness' heart."
"Shhh!" Ignacio hushed.
"I can't believe even you're jealous of him," Jasper sighed.
"He's a celebrity," Ignacio replied. "Ness won't even give me the time of day over him. Next to Blainerson...I'm just Ignacio."
"Ooh," Jasper said. "You're only a genius supermodel? I'd never even had my first kiss, but almost every girl here has wanted to smooch you."
Melissa looked away. "Not really...I mean not after me and my Adi-kins found each other."
Ignacio blushed. "I guess you're right. I am good enough for Ness...but am good enough that she'd pick me instead of her dream guy?"
"Her dream guy is someone sweet and cute," Melissa said. "You fit the bill marvelously."
Jasper nodded. "Plus, if she gets to know the real Blainerson it'll be no contest."
/
Riley launched another dart.
"Owww!"
"Sorry!" Riley called out.
"It's fine," Ness replied. "Wouldn't be the first dart shot in my butt…"
Ness tried to pull out the dart, only for it to slip out of her hands and pop another one of her balloons.
"It looks like Rosey is creaming Jess," Blainerson announced.
"Ness," the jinx corrected. "How do you not know our names yet? You even have cue cards with them."
Pop. Riley shot another one of Ness' balloons, as her small competitor sank lower.
"Maybe you should focus on the challenge," Blainerson stated. "You're not doing so hot Jess. I was hoping for more from one of my fans."
"I was hoping for more from my favorite musician," Ness replied, gritting her teeth.
Riley tossed aside her blowgun and grabbed all the darts from her bag. "Sorry Loch Ness, but I'm ending this."
Squinting, Riley tossed one dart after the other. Ness covered her face, but the darts popped balloon after balloon until…
"Ahhhhhh!"
Ness plummeted from the sky, landing on top of Blainerson instead of the pool.
"I'd appreciate fans who aren't clingy," Blainerson stating, throwing Ness off his back.
Ness rolled her eyes. "You don't have to worry about that from me."
/
She joined the others in the audience.
"Are you alright?" Ignacio asked.
"I'm completely embarrassed," Ness admitted.
"Don't be, that challenge-"
"Not that," Ness said. "Was I really that over the top at Blainerson's arrival?"
"What...no way," Ignacio said. "You totally weren't crazy at all…"
"I can't believe I always fall for such jerks," Ness sighed. "Markie, Pascal, Blainerson…I think I might have as bad taste in music as I do men. Why can't I seem to find a nice guy?"
"I don't know," Melissa added. "I wish you would, especially when he's right next to you."
"Huh?"
/
"Quiet from the peanut gallery," Blainerson stated. "With that win, Riley makes it another round."
"Woooo!" the skater cheered. "Now...can someone help me down?"
/
Back inside, Riley and Jasper stood on stage. They each hold a giant refrigerator magnet with their name on it. The stage had been converted into an arena, with solid white walls trapping them inside. Blainerson watched them from above his throne.
"As our final two, Rosey and Jorah will compete in the semi finals," Blainerson announced. "This head to head is about being creative. I call this one Paint Of Heart."
Rising from under the stage, a wheel of giant barrels of paint surfaced. Various brushes, sponges, and buckets were in-between the barrels.
"And what is our task this time, oh great one?" Jasper asked.
"Thank you for asking so nicely Jasper," Blainerson stated. "This room's walls and floor are entirely white. Whoever can cover more of the room in their color paint wins. You'll place your name on whichever color you want, and can use any of the tools."
"Sounds fun," Riley admitted. "I love a good arts and craft project."
"That's super," Blainerson said. "Now, you'll have five minutes. Any other questions?"
Jasper raised his hand. "I-"
"-Great," Blainerson said. "On your mark, get set...go!"
Riley bolted and reached the paint cans first. She slapped her name on the first can, red, and grabbed a paint roller. Jasper followed, slapping his name on the nearby green. As he scooped paint, Riley was going over the wall.
"You know what they say about painting the town red?" Riley teased.
Jasper splattered her wall with his bucket. "You should paint it green instead?"
Riley smirked. She ran a circle around the room, trailing the roller behind her and creating a red pathway.
Jasper didn't bother following, splattering more of the walls.
"My little bro is actually taking the lead," Blainerson announced. "Can he keep it up? I mean, I'm sure he can."
"I don't think he meant it," Melissa whispered.
Riley continued smirking however. With the paint roller in one hand and a brush in another, she ran towards her paint can.
"CANNONBALL!"
Riley jumped and dropped in the can. She emerged, covered in paint. Shaking her tools to splash paint everywhere, She threw herself against a blank wall and started rolling against it.
"What's she doing?" Ness asked.
"She's become a human sponge," Ignacio exclaimed.
Soon, outlines of Riley lined the walls, along with her footprints and drippings from shaking the brushes.
Riley dived back into her can and started slamming against Jasper's wall. It made a brownish-red imprint.
"And Rosey has taken the lead," Blainerson stated. "Despite my total faith in my brother, he lost the lead. With only two minutes left too."
Jasper frowned as he saw Riley's red-brown sponge splatters against his wall. Suddenly, he smiled though and ran back to the cans.
By now, Riley had resorted to scooping with a bucket, her giant can having lost most of its paint.
"Man," she said, "if I didn't know this paint this room would like several murders happened...kind of like the rest of the hotel."
THUD.
She turned her head to see Jasper body slamming into a paint can. The can toppled over, spilling purple paint all over the ground.
"Dude, what have you against purple?" Riley asked.
"Nothing," Jasper replied. "In fact, I think I might be my new color."
He slammed his name tag from the green paint onto the tipped over can.
Riley raised an eyebrow. "Wait, what are-"
Jasper ran over and dived into a blue can.
She noticed the purple tidal wave of paint, cover the floor, making it a reddish purple. Jasper burst out of the blue paint. He started throwing himself against Riley's imprints, smearing them with his arms till they turned purple.
"Oh crap," Riley exclaimed. She tried to grab two paint buckets, but Jasper grabbed one and started chucking blue paint against her other splatterings.
"Time!" Blainerson called. "Drop your brushes...and bodies."
The two froze. Everyone started at the paint soaked room. Blainerson traced his finger over the room.
"It looks like the winner...was Jasper?"
"YES!" He cheered.
"The rules don't discourage against switching paint," Blainerson said, overlooking the cue card. "So I guess that is a win…"
Riley held out her fist. "Nicely played Pastor Jasper."
Jasper stared at the fist.
Riley laughed and grabbed his hand, before bumping their fists together.
"Oh," Jasper laughed, blushing slightly.
"So is the challenge over so soon?" Melissa asked. "That gives me time to make supper tonight. Any requests?"
"Slow your roll early losing girl," Blainerson said. "That was only the semi-finals match. To win invincibility you have to win the final head to head...against me."
"What?" Jasper asked.
"I know," Blainerson said. "Isn't that twist mind shattering?"
"No, not really," Jasper replied. "Why am I competing against you though? You're not even a contestant."
"Everyone knows the host is the most important part of the show," Blainerson said. "That's why people watch reality shows. So I should be the final opponent! Plus, we can't just have four rounds. That's not as cool a number."
"People watch for the gameplay, not the host," Jasper said. "And-"
"That's nice," Blainerson said, "but those are the rules Judah. Will my little brother compete against me? Or will he forfeit?"
"What? Why would I-'
"-Who will be the winner?" Blainerson asked. "Find out after this commercial break, when 'The Untitled Project' returns…"
Blainerson turned away from the cameras, throwing his arm over Jasper and escorting him to the side.
"He knows this isn't live, right?" Ignacio asked.
/
"Do you seriously think I'm going to forfeit?" Jasper asked.
"I assumed you'd want to," Blainerson replied. "To avoid being humiliated on live TV."
"Humiliated?"
"When I beat you," Blainerson said.
"What if I win," Jasper said.
Blainerson laughed so hard, he fell to the ground. He stopped when he saw Jasper glaring over him. "Wait, are you serious? No offense baby brother but you're...not exactly a winner."
"I won my way this far," Jasper stated. "I've won the most challenges of anyone here."
"I totally believe that," Blainerson said. "But do you honestly think you can beat me?"
"You afraid?" Jasper asked.
"I'm afraid I'm going to hurt my little brother's feelings," Blainerson replied. "Let's face it Jasper, I'm better at you at...everything. The only game you could win as a kid was hide and seek, and you didn't even know we were playing!"
"You always think you're so much better than me," Jasper said.
"I'm just stating facts," Blainerson said. "I mean, one of us is successful, well-known, accomplished and the other is...you."
Blainerson shook his head. "Look, do yourself a favor and forfeit. I'll say that as the head honcho I'll give you invincibility or whatever for the challenge. That way you can stay safe and don't have to fail at the challenge."
Jasper walked away.
"Great talk baby bro! Love you're trying, it's cute!"
/
Blainerson took a seat backstage as Rhonda, Jenny, and Toby clapped at his arrival. Rhonda handed him a water bottle, Jenny held up a mirror for him, and Toby wiped the sweat from his forehead.
"You've been doing amazing," Rhonda said. "Real great job Blainerson! One tip between hosts though, try to remember the names-"
"Thanks Raina," Blainerson replied. "I was a little nervous, but hosting is such a cakewalk."
"Sure is," Jenny replied. "So that means you'll do your own gameshow?"
Blainerson nodded. "I got to give the people what they want; more of me, but in new situations."
"I guess that means our shows will be airing buddies this fall," Rhonda joked.
"Ooh…"
"What?"
"They didn't tell you?" Blainerson asked.
"Tell us what?" Toby asked.
"Yeah...they're not renewing this show," Blainerson replied.
…
…
…
"WHAT?" Rhonda screamed.
"Yeah," Blainerson said.
"Why?" Rhonda asked. "We've been killing it! Ever since we got that primetime slot and the merge started our ratings have been high and are still rising!"
"The network says they'd rather cut their loses," Blainerson replied. "Something about a ship still sinking or a money pit or something."
"Why did they tell you this?" Toby asked.
"I think it's because my gameshow is taking your slot," Blainerson admitted.
"Again," Rhonda said, "WHAT?"
"They wanted me to promote it'll be airing at this timeslot."
Blainerson turned to the cameras. "Coming this fall! The most McManly game show you've ever seen! Starring Blainerson McManly...hey, that's me!"
"You mean you didn't come because you liked and wanted to be a part of our show?" Rhonda asked.
Blainerson laughed. "Oh heavens no! I said I wanted to appear on TV, not this mess. Jasper loves it, so I assume it has to be boring."
"That's...fair actually," Jenny admitted. "Still, you creep! You just came here to promote your brand."
"I call it Branderson," Blainerson admitted.
"How could you do this to us," Rhonda asked. "After we designed these challenges for you. I gave you some of my best puns! I mean Pukeclear Reactor! I've been saving that for a special occasion."
"It didn't go to waste," Blainerson said. "It went to me! Look, it's nothing personal. The network wants to play it safe. They want somebody famous. They want a show that can guarantee an audience and will entertain people. That's not Genesis. It never was."
Blainerson yawned and stood up. "Commercials are probably over. Thanks for the pep talk guys, I feel great! My hair looks great. You're doing great, it's all great."
Toby rolled his eyes while Jenny blew a raspberry as he strutted away.
"What a phony," Jenny said. "I can't believe I let him borrow my focus. Me! The main character of this fanfic!"
"Have you ever been a relevant character?" Toby asked.
"YOUR MOM!"
/
Blainerson returned to the stage. He winked and waved at the unimpressed audience of the newcomers. Finally, after taking a few bows, he continued. "Welcome back folks! When we left off, Jasper had just made the finals when in the biggest twist on this show, I was his final opponent. So Jasper, is there something you want to say?"
Jasper walked up to the stage. "Blainerson...I didn't need you to give me handouts. I'd rather lose than have to give you credit for my win. So, let's do this."
Blainerson shook his head. "Not smart baby bro. Very well, then for the final head to head…"
He drew a card. "Ooh! I hope you like breakfast!"
"Breakfast?" Jasper asked.
/
Back in the courtyard, in place of the arena and stage was now a tower of giant pancakes. Jasper and Blainerson had changed into Japanese loincloths. Blainerson flexed and smoothed back his hair as Jasper raised his eyebrow.
"So what is this?" Jasper asked. "Besides an excuse for you to show-off?"
"The final match is the Syrup Sumo Showdown," Blainerson stated. "The first to knock their opponent off the pancake stack wins. Still want to go through this?"
Jasper stared him down. "You're going to taste defeat. Sweet, fluffy, defeat."
"Sure Jan...I mean Jasper."
The two brothers stared each other down from across the giant pancakes. Blainerson snapped his fingers. Two interns rang a gong in the background. Syrup fell from the stage ceiling in the middle of the pancake.
The two ran at each other.
"Come on Jasper," Blainerson said. "I know you, you can't win."
"What do you know about me?" Jasper asked.
"Uhhh…"
Jasper shoved his brother down. "Nothing. But I know all I need to know about you."
Jasper went to tackle Blainerson, but slipped in the syrup. Blainerson grabbed Jasper's arm, putting him in a hold.
"What is that?"
"That you're a terrible brother," Jasper said. "You're too self-absorbed and fame hungry."
"What are you talking about?" Blainerson asked. "When have I been a bad brother?"
"Where to start," Jasper replied. "How about when you threw a concert on my last birthday. You didn't even invite me. Or lost me when we were Trick or Treating as kids. Or made out with Maya Ecckles after I told you I had a crush on her!"
Jasper broke free of the hold and now pinned his brother down. "I didn't think you'd be upset!"
"You didn't think about me at all," Jasper replied. "Even coming on this show. The one place people actually know my name...usually. You made this show all about you."
Blainerson broke free and pushed Jasper back. "And what's it all about then?"
Jasper glared. "People don't watch for the host, they watch for the game. For the players of it and the eventual winner. I'm one of the players."
Jasper tried to tackle Blainerson again, but his older brother held him back with one arm. "And you think people want to watch you? The guy nobody can remember."
Blainerson knocked Jasper back. Jasper tried to get to his feet, but slipped.
"I want to be real with you," Blainerson said. "So let me explain. Mom and dad went to my concert because it was bigger than your birthday. I lost you Trick or Treating on purpose because I didn't want to spend Halloween bored. That girl didn't know you existed."
"Be real?" Jasper asked. "Blainerson McManly isn't even your real name!"
Ness gasped. "Oh my gosh...actually it does sound really fake."
"You're name is John-"
Blainerson put his brother in a chokehold. "I had it legally changed!"
He started to drag Jasper to the edge of the pancake. "Here's real. You're either a somebody or a nobody. Our family is full of somebodies, but you're the exception. You're a nobody."
With a grunt, the musician lifted Jasper off and threw him off the side. He turned and walked away.
"I...am...not...a...nobody!"
"What?" Blainerson asked.
He turned to see Jasper holding on to the stack by one hand. Panting, Jasper pulled himself up from the edge.
"You're still going?"
Jasper shrugged.
His brother tried to grab him. Jasper, covered in syrup, was easily able to slip free. "I'm not going to let you tell me who I am."
The two grappled with each other. From the audience, the other newcomers cheered.
"You got this Jasper!" Melissa said.
"Knock Blanderson down a peg," Ignacio added.
"You have him on the ropes," Ness added.
"You got this Bro and Tell!" Riley shouted.
"They're cheering for...you?" Blainerson asked. "Why?"
"Cause we like Jasper?" Riley replied.
"And you're not that very nice either," Melissa added.
"I'd go with the worst," Ignacio added.
Blainerson looked at Ness. "You're rooting for me, right? You know you love my music...and my well quaffed hair. "
Ness pretended to yawn. "Did you guys hear something? Sounded like an overrated jerk?"
"Nope."
"Nada."
"Can't say I have."
Jasper smirked. Sneaking beyond his brother and scooping syrup in his hands, he chucked it at Blainerson's hair.
"NOT THE HAIR," Blainerson screamed.
Jasper charged, knocking the teen idol down. "I'd say it's been fun Blainerson, but it never is with you. Tell Mom and Dad I said hi, and beat you on international television!"
With a kick, Jasper shoved him off the pancake stack. The other newcomers whooped in cheered. Blainerson groaned, trying to stand, but kept slipping and faceplanting in the syrup.
/
Rhonda, Jenny, and Toby stood outside a trailer in front of the Pentagram. They banged on the door.
"Hey, you're not done!" Rhonda yelled. "You still have to announce the results...and plug your stupid show."
Blainerson pouted in his dressing room, only wearing a red robe. He sighed as his beauticians tried to fix his hair, but their combs got stuck to his head.
"Just a reminder," Jenny said. "The results are Jasper won. By beating you. Incase you forgot."
"I'm not leaving my trailer!" Blainerson yelled. "This hosting thing sucks! Your contestants failed; they wouldn't stop ignoring me or talking back or giving the wrong reactions. For all my hard work I was ignored, humiliated, and insulted."
"Oh?" Rhonda asked. "Oh really? Did your little feelings get hurt because hosting is so hard? WELCOME TO MY LIFE. I've been spending the past four years being treated like that."
"Your show has been on for three months," Blainerson stated.
"Well, it feels like four," Rhonda replied. "This experience has aged me! Like I'm a president in office. Being a host means spending all your time planning and working on something, only for it to blow up in your face. You deal with it though, because you love the show."
"Grossssssss," Blainerson said. "Count me out on hosting."
Rhonda roared and stomped off.
"Nice going Rhonda!" Jenny said, as she and Toby chased after her. "You convinced Blainerson to quit."
"I can't believe I'm saying this," Toby said, "You may have actually saved the day."
"I didn't change anything," Rhonda replied. "So maybe Blainerson's out, but the network will replace us. They already decided so. They'll just get a new show, probably with cops."
"But-"
"It's over," Rhonda said. "Don't you get it? We failed."
"I'm in shock," Jasper stated. "I...I actually did it! Not only did I cream Blainerson, I've won invincibility four times! I actually made it to the final four! Me! No one is going to believe this, even if they watch the show."
Jasper forced a laugh. "I just...it wasn't about beating Blainerson. I mean it was great, but...just to prove somebody they were wrong about me. It's the best feeling in the world. To prove I can be a winner, be important...be a somebody. To really prove it though, I have to win. Not just today, but this whole show. I just don't know if I actually can…"
Melissa was working in the kitchen as Ness walked up.
"Oh Ness," Melissa said.
"Hey Melissa," Ness replied. "What'cha doing?"
"Baking," Melissa said. "Shocking, I know. I'm just trying to calm my nerves, think of a plan."
"A plan?"
Melissa nodded. "For tonight. ...Riley's targeting me, isn't she?"
"I um...I…"
"She made it obvious at the challenge today," Melissa replied. "Has she already talked to you?"
Ness sighed, but nodded. "Yeah…"
Melissa forced a smile. "I see. Well, that means there's only one person I have to vote for; her. Are you in?"
"I don't want to vote for either of you!" Ness replied. "But the only other person is Iggy. And I promised I wouldn't vote for myself anymore…"
"You know I hate asking you this," Melissa said. "But it's her or me tonight. Maybe she already has the boys, I don't know. If you vote with me, either I'm saved or it doesn't change anything and you don't have to feel bad."
Ness rubbed the back of her head. "I'll think on it."
"That's good enough for me," Melissa replied. "Thanks Ness. Now I need to make a miracle..."
/
"So we're all in on this?" Riley asked.
She, Jasper, and Ignacio were in the game room.
Jasper nodded. "You know I've been trying to get Melissa out since Tessa left."
"I should have wised up sooner," Riley stated. "Kudos on getting her out today. Unlike some people."
"I said I was sorry," Ignacio stated.
Riley laughed. "I'm just giving you a hard time dude. You know I can't stay mad at you."
"Is Ness onboard?" Ignacio asked. "She and Melissa are really close."
"If we all onboard she'll go with us," Riley replied. "Then it'll be a Fizzled Firework final four finale!"
"Alliterative and exciting," Igancio said.
"I know right?" Riley asked. "Let's get it done bros."
Riley raised her fist as Jasper and Ignacio joined her.
/
That night, a disheveled Rhonda stumbled into the Haunted Internet Cafe.
"Are you alright Ms. Rhonda?" Melissa asked. "You've never been late to an elimination before."
"I'm fine, just dandy," Rhonda moaned. "Just feeling crushed by my existence as a constant and inevitable failure."
"That doesn't sound dandy," Jasper said.
Rhonda threw a coffee cup at him, that he barely dodged. "Here's your cup Mister Winner. Must be nice...winning."
"I'm still not used to it," Jasper admitted. "Hey...what's in this cup?"
"My tears."
Rhonda half-heartedly kicked another one towards Ignacio. "One for pretty boy. And another for blondie."
Rhonda threw the cup completely off-course. Ness looked at Ignacio, who shrugged.
"You know how long I practiced?" Rhonda asked. "For six months, I practiced aiming and throwing full coffee cups and other small objects to people. For this show. Not like any of that matters? I just learned a skill I thought I'd need for years, but is useless! USELESS!"
Riley and Melissa shared a look. "So I guess it's just you and me."
"I wish it wasn't," Melissa replied.
"Honestly...I kind of hate it," Riley said. "For both of us. We can't change it now though."
The two turned to see Rhonda leaning against her podium. "Don't cut back to me! Just...insert some confessionals or something, gawd!"
"I tried my best to campaign to stay," Melissa explained. "I even made new snickerdoodle pumpkin spice peanut butter chocolate chip cookies for the occasion. I just hope everything I did was enough…"
"I have no idea whose going," Riley said. "I hope it's Melissa. I hope all of us Fireworks can keep band together. We can vote out the biggest threat, I can avenge Tessa...but I can't control what everyone's going to do."
Rhonda sighed, barley lifting her head. "Alright, the last coffee cup goes to…"
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
"Melissa."
Melissa sighed in relief.
"You can come get it if you want," Rhonda said. "I don't care. It doesn't matter anyway."
Rhonda waddled off, kicking over a trash can, climbing inside, and rolling away in it.
Riley stood up. "Whelp, that sucks."
"I'm sorry Riley," Ness said. "The truth is-"
"-Don't sweat it," Riley replied. "You did what you thought is best. Everyone who voted for me did. I get it."
"You're not upset about being eliminated?" Ignacio asked.
"I am," Riley admitted. "I'm just trying not to let it bug me. What can I do? What's done is done. I gotta leave with my head held high."
"You really are like no one else," Melissa said. "I'm sorry it ended this way."
Riley shrugged. "I probably shouldn't have been so obviously gung-ho about eliminating you. You're still cool Miss Mel. Good luck. You too Jasper."
Ignacio and Ness pulled Riley in for a group hug. She laughed and ruffled their heads. "And of course good luck to you two. I'm going to miss you Loch Ness and Iggy Pop."
Riley grabbed her luggage. "All four of you are awesome, and you all deserve to win! Have fun! If you excuse me, I gotta get some food. I'm starving…"
Everyone shared a laugh, as Riley flashed a peace sign and exited out the door.
As the newcomers started to disperse, Jasper winked at Melissa. She forced a smile and gave a thumbs up.
/
Earlier…
"...So what do you say?" Melissa asked.
She sat with Jasper in the luxury suite, before elimination. Jasper took another cookie off her plate. "Well, you do make some good points. You also make some good cookies."
"Thank you!"
"But I don't know," Jasper said. "I'm just not sure."
Melissa frowned. "I understand. Has...has Riley already come to you?"
Jasper nodded. "Yeah. She also made some good points."
"So what are you going to do?" Melissa asked.
"I guess we'll find out tonight," Jasper replied.
Melissa stood up. "Well, one last thing for you to consider. I know you've voted for me before. But if I go, who will they vote off next?"
"Huh?"
"Iggy, Riley, and Ness have been with each other for forever," Melissa admitted. "They voted you off before; you're an outsider. They won't take you to the final three. You'll have to win the next challenge."
Jasper shrugged. "I guess I'll just win it then. Sorry."
Melissa nodded and walked toward the door.
"Unless…"
Melissa turned around. "Unless?"
"Unless someone gave me a reason otherwise…"
Melissa titled her head. "Like?"
"I'll cut to the chase," Jasper said. "Make me a deal."
"What?"
"Make me a deal," Jasper repeated. "I realize that nobody left is great to go to the end with...but it's too late to fix that. I just need to make it to the finale."
"I can't promise that," Melissa admitted.
"Then I guess we're done here," Jasper said.
Jasper whistled as he walked away. Melissa watched, before hanging her head."I already made a final 2 deal with someone else. But...I promise I'll take you to the final 3."
Jasper raised an eyebrow. "That's not a super pitch…"
"It's the only deal I can make," Melissa pleaded. "But at the final 3, you still could win your way to the finale. Plus, you wouldn't have to take me. That's still better odds than with Riley. I'm sure she's telling Iggy and Ness they'll be a final 3."
Jasper rubbed his chin in thought for a moment. "You swear you'll take me to the final 3?"
"I'll do everything I can to," Melissa replied.
Jasper thought for a moment. Finally, he held out his hand. The two shook. "Deal."
/
Ventura Highway
In the sunshine
Where the days are longer
The nights are stronger
Than moonshine
You're gonna go I know
'Cause the free wind is blowin' through
Your hair
And the days surround you daylight
There
Seasons crying no despair
Alligator lizards in the air
Riley sat in the front seat of the bus, her eyes closed as she listened to the song. She sighed, wiping a tear away from her eye.
"I made the final five," Riley said to herself. "I have to be happy about that. I can't dwell on the past. I just gotta remember all the good times…"
She opened her eyes. "Where do I go now?"
The bus suddenly halted to a stop. The doors opened as Jenny and Toby climbed inside the bus.
"Jenny and Toby?" Riley asked. "Did Rhonda kick you out?"
"As if she could," Jenny replied. "We're...going with you. To film an episode about the losers."
"Really?" Riley asked.
"We were tired of Rhonda's crying," Toby stated.
Jenny elbowed him in the gut. "Shhh! We're just super excited about showing everyone at home what the eliminated players have been up to."
The two took the seat across from Riley as the bus started to drive-away again.
"Oh no," Riley said. "I'm going to see everyone again, aren't I? Tessa, Lita, Seraphina, Easton...Gris."
"Yup," Jenny replied. "One big reunion where everyone can see how you stumbled and fell right at the end."
Toby elbowed her in the gut now.
"So where are we headed?" Riley asked.
"Playa Des Losers."
Author's Note
I hope you enjoyed the chapter, I enjoyed writing it and had been looking forward to it for a long time.
I had planned to introduce Jasper's brother since the start of the story. He's mentioned as early as the first chapter. I hadn't fully decided on who he would be, but the first mention of Blainerson was when I had solidified his identity. Originally, he would have been Jasper's partner in that worst enemy challenge. I think I scrapped that challenge just because I felt like they weren't be enough enemies for all the characters, or it would've been their loved ones. I think I like this challenge better though. I enjoyed coming up with the individual duels.
Blainerson was also fun to write and it was very satisfying to give Jasper this moment. I also like what it's leading for the host trio.
I do hope it didn't overshadow Riley's elimination though. Riley was a well-liked character. I'm personally surprised on how much I enjoyed writing her, but also proud of how she was received from those readers on the wiki. She was fun and a great character to interact with others. Of course, we're not entirely done with Riley yet...
I forgot to mention this last chapter, but it was after then that I held a fan favorite contest. Readers voted on who was their favorite and who they wanted to get a fan favorite award at the finale like some actual reality shows do. So look forward to see who won that in...four chapters! We're almost at the finale! If you've been reading this far, I'd love to know your thoughts!
Appendix: Elimination History
Bethany (Eagles)- 22nd
Diamonique (Eagles)- RETURNED
Jasper (Fireworks)- RETURNED
Tessa (Fireworks)- RETURNED
Zipporah (Fireworks)- 21st
Hayden (Eagles)- 20th
Frannie (Eagles)- 19th
Aiden (Eagles)- 18th
Pascal (Fireworks)- 17th
Easton (Fireworks)- 16th
Seraphina (Fireworks)- 15th
MERGE
Cynthia- 14th
Griswold- 13th
Xidorn- 12th
Diamonique- 11th
Lita- 10th
Weston- 9th
Kalino- 8th
Tessa- 7th
Vance- 6th
Riley- 5th