Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha (Rumiko Takahashi-san and Viz do). If I did, I would probably also own a boxed set of the anime by now and not be sad about Viz taking it off their website...

A/N: Sorry this one took so long! Who would have thought that a Kōga/Ayame story would have me stumped? I guess there's a big difference between 'I ship them and have an idea' and 'I can shape this idea into an acceptable story'. It's just hard for me to get a good grasp of their relationship and it's potential, especially because we don't see much of it in the anime. So, I took what was there and made some speculations while also fitting it into the 'Jealousy' series I have started within Inuvember. Comments, are of course, always welcome - whether they be praise, constructive criticism, or 'you are literally the worst writer ever, plz go die.'

Please enjoy (or let me know if you don't)!

DAY 18

Kōga ships

Kōga/Ayame: Jealousy (Part 4) Getting to Know You

Ayame sat on a rock in the middle of a meadow, surrounded by flowers. She conjured more - blooms that did not grow in this meadow - and they flitted through the air before she let them fall gently beside her. She knew he was nearby but did not acknowledge him.

Kōga stood just inside the tree line. She was lovely, beautiful, practically a stranger. He was the leader of his tribe - strong and fearless - this was supposed to be easy. Two reassuring hands rested on his shoulders.

"You've got this," Ginta said. "Just be kind to her."

"And honest," Hakkaku added.

They pushed him. Kōga stumbled forward a few feet into the meadow and glared at his friends through the trees. They just grinned at him and made little shooing motions with their hands. The nerve of those two! Ayame looked over at him and all her flowers fell to the rock she sat on. She didn't break eye contact as he walked over. He reached the rock and stood in silence for a few moments. She looked at him, waiting.

"Ayame, I, uh… it's been a while." He was usually much better at this - smoother, completely calm, and oozing confidence. He stood before her, nervous and unsure. For once in his life, worried that a woman would reject him.

"It has," she agreed. This wasn't the Kōga she was used to. He was hesitant, repentant almost.

"You'd better not have come here to break your promise!" The thought occurred to her suddenly and she was afraid. Why do I still cling to it? Why does it hurt?

"Calm down, woman, I didn't come here to do that." He brushed her concerns aside, gathering up his usual bravado.

"What did you come here to do?"

"I came here to apologize."

"What did you do?!"

"Nothing." She glared at him. "Nothing you don't already know about," he quickly amended.

Ayame waited for him to continue.

"I dismissed and disregarded your feelings. I'm sorry."

"Oh." So far, so good. But he really should have apologized to me sooner.

"And I hope you can forgive me, because I also misled you."

No. He really had come to break his promise. She didn't want to let him go. But, did Ayame really want to keep him if it meant keeping him from his own happiness? Did she really want to be with someone who longed for another? It was an old promise - a silly thing really, made carelessly between two children. She cared for him. Still wanted him. "If you truly love Kagome, and she loves you in return, then I release you from your promise." It was time to let him go.

"Kagome? She's part of it, but I'm not leaving you for her."

"Instead you'll just spend all your time wishing I was her?" Ayame asked bitterly. "I don't think I want to be the wife of a man who loves someone else!"

"Ayame, I -"

"Just stop it, Kōga! I know you want her. I know you're never going to give up - that you aren't the type to give up on anything, no matter how stupid and pigheaded it makes you! So, just go. Leave me alone - I don't want to be anyone's consolation prize." Ayame slid off the rock and walked away from him.

"Ayame, wait!" He ran forward and blocked her path. "Please, listen. Just hear me out."

It was just like Hakkaku had warned him - she was done putting up with his bullshit and would find someone else. He had always just assumed that Ayame would forgive him, that she would be his no matter what. But what if she wouldn't? He still had to say it. Had to tell her the truth, even if she hated him now.

"I don't love her. I don't want her. Kagome is a friend to me and that isn't going to change."

"If that's all she is to you, then why are you always crossing paths and calling her your woman? You bring her flowers and flirt with her - don't think I don't know. Ginta and Hakkaku told me."

"Yeah, guess I had them fooled too," he sighed. She looked at him, like she wanted to ask a question, but he continued. "At first, I did want her. I thought we'd be a good match and that she would lead the tribe at my side. But, I was wrong. It took me a while to realize that. Kagome is kind and strong and a good friend, but that's all we are - friends. She would not make a good wife for me, and I don't think I would be a good husband to her." He paused again, before launching into the heart of his explanation.

"I want my friends to be happy. I know she loves that hanyō, and he loves her too, but he just needed to get his head out of his ass. So I decided to fix that. I knew that if I made him jealous enough, he would get his act together and tell her how he feels."

"You thought flirting with Kagome was a good way to get her and Inuyasha together?" Ayame asked, crossing her arms.

"Yes, and it worked. I'm so glad you understand," he said, puffing up with pride.

"You -" she bend over, howling with laughter - "are so stupid, Kōga! What if it didn't work? What if he tore you to shreds or she fell in love with you?"

"That pathetic mutt could never beat me!"

Ayame continued to laugh.

"And if she had fallen in love with me, I would've dealt with it!"

"How? By explaining your stupid scheme and declaring you love for me?" Ayame snickered.

She waited for Kōga to snap back, but he was silent.

"Kōga?" Just because he doesn't want Kagome, doesn't mean he wants me either, she realized as her heart sank.

'She deserves your honesty.' Hakkaku's words echoed in his head. Kōga always embodied confidence, but he felt so uncertain. "Ayame, I… I don't know you well enough to love you. But… I think I want to - get to know you."

"Why did you make that promise? Under the lunar rainbow?"

"I'm not sure," he admitted.

"So you just go around issuing proposals you're unsure of, Kōga?" she countered.

"No, I don't!" he protested. "That night, when you got lost, I was sent to look for you. I knew you were the princess of the northern tribes - my father told me to make an impression. I found you and you were crying, and I just felt this need to protect you and make sure you would always be okay. And you honestly seemed kind of smitten with me and I thought it would make you happy, so I said it and didn't really think anything of it for years…"

"Oh."

"What were you expecting me to say, Ayame? That I desired you with a burning passion, or some other nonsense? Four years is nothing now, but it was a pretty big age difference then! You were just a kid and I wanted to cheer you up."

What was I expecting? I didn't seek him out after all these years just because he was handsome and kind to me.

"I guess we both had political reasons," Ayame admitted. "But, I still have feelings for you. New feelings."

"Oh, really?" he asked, his cocky attitude returning in full force.

"Yes, really!" she retorted, smacking his arm. "You may be a bit full of yourself, but I see you strength, loyalty, and warmth and I just feel excited when I'm around you. I don't think anyone, or anything, else has ever made me feel so alive, Kōga."

"That must be quite the accomplishment, because I've never met anyone more full of life than you, Ayame."

He continued, "I see your fire and passion, and I can't help wanting more of it. I was going to wait until I defeated Naraku to seek you out, but I don't want to wait anymore." Life was precious, it could easily be taken away. His life could easily be taken away. No one knew how much time they had until it ran out.

"You'll win," Ayame reassured him, "and we'll have plenty of time to get to know each other." She tugged on the fur wrap around his shoulders. Kōga bent down and Ayame kissed him.