Author's Note: Look at me! I'm still alive. Yeah... It's nearly been a year since I've posted anything for this story... Oops? I've just been terribly inactive. Part of me is wanting to blame moving out and having a lot of course work. But that's not all. I'm not going to make any promises though as I probably won't be able to keep them anyway. The worst part of all? This chapter is absolutely worthless, and I've actually worked really long on it, it didn't go anywhere near where I wanted it to be. So just consider it as a bridging chapter and the real stuff might start next chapter or that might be another briding chapter. idk. Just go read it.

Disclaimer: The only thing I can claim from this chapter is my knowledge about warm milk being a pain to clean out of a cup when it dried up. My dad is a huge fan of warm milk.

8. Midnight Wanderings

It was the middle of the night and you could find The Doctor laying wide awake in his bed in Sarah Jane's guest room.

He sighed, he has been trying to fall asleep for a couple of hours now, but it wasn't really happening. His head was just too full of thoughts.

Well, more than normal anyway.

As he had told Sarah Jane, he did miss travelling but at the same time was content with his current situation.

Obviously, those two thoughts conflicted quite a bit, so he wasn't quite sure what he actually wanted. What if he started travelling again and found that he didn't like it anymore?

He shook his head, he'd never get tired of travelling. Then again, he'd never thought he could settle down and be content, yet here he was. Okay, he wasn't completely content, he still missed Rose dearly but that wouldn't change if he was to start travelling again.

The Time Lord sat up, throwing the covers off his upper body.

He looked at the shelves, most of them were filled with books. He had, of course, already read all of them prior to coming here. Nevertheless, he had spent the first couple of weeks after being allowed out of the infirmary rereading them. Mostly because he had been bored and hadn't been strong enough to do anything else really.

One of the shelves contained a picture of Sarah Jane and him during his fourth regeneration, taken during a festival on a planet that was given to celebrate the end of a war. He sometimes stared at the picture, getting lost in the memories of that day and travelling with Sarah Jane overall.

He sighed before moving the covers from him and got slowly out of bed, planning on getting a glass of warm milk hoping that it might help him sleep.

The Time Lord sneaked over the landing careful not to wake anyone, he didn't want to bother anyone with his insomnia. After carefully walking down the stairs he padded towards the kitchen where he finally dared to turn on a light. His sight was better than humans and therefore he could find his way around easier in the dark but he still preferred working with enough light.

The Doctor got some milk from the fridge, poured it into a mug and put it into the microwave, slightly cringing at the sound that the thing made in the middle of the night. Admittedly, it made the same amount of noise as it always made, but it did feel louder in the middle of the night.

While he was waiting for his milk to be done he lend backwards on the counter, staring at the ceiling as he once again pondered his feelings on being able to travel again.

It was his passion to travel the universe and keep learning new things, it has been his driving force for years, most of his life actually, it was the only thing he lived for.

Yet here he was, surprisingly content with domestics.

He was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't notice the stairs creaking and someone coming into the room. He was only made aware of this when a hand on his shoulder startled him and almost making him yell out. He quickly turned his head to meet Sarah Jane's eyes, and let out a sigh of relief.

"Blimey…" He said as he was trying to get his heartbeat back to normal. "You scared me."

"I didn't sneak up to you." She said and then continued in a frown. "You were very far away there. What's on your mind Doctor?" She wondered.

"I just. I just." He sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. "Just, the same thing as earlier." He muttered. "Just, I want to travel. It's part of me. But…"

"You don't want to leave." Sarah Jane finished for him. He nodded at her.

"I'm not sure what I want most, though." He admitted.

"It's a difficult choice." She agreed. "But not one you necessarily have to make." She added causing the Time Lord to frown at her.

"But I do, it's either staying or leaving. If you let me leave to begin with that is." He added with a look at her.

At that moment the microwave dinged, indicating that it was done. He quickly opened the door and carefully took out the cup of milk, he blew slightly onto it to prevent himself from burning his tongue.

"I think you know very well that I won't keep you here forever. And we both know that I wouldn't be able to do that anyway. " She shot him a knowing look. "You could've left if you had really wanted to weeks ago."

He smiled at that. "True, I doubt you would've forgiven me though."

"You're kept here for your own well being, If you'd left I wouldn't have been angry. You're an adult, no matter how much you act like you're not, and you would've been completely in your right if you'd left. However, I certainly would've been worried about you if you had left." She admitted.

"I thought you were worried about me anyway?" the Time Lord wondered with a smile in his voice.

"Okay, more than normal." She amended unable to keep the smile from her face.

He let out a yawn, this kind of conversation was pretty tiring and he was already slightly sleep deprived.

She smiled sympathetically at him. "Really though, you don't have to choose between those two options. There are more. I would love to go over them with you, but you're tired. Just remember that you have other options for now. Does that help?

He nodded hesitantly. "A bit I think."

"Why don't you finish your milk and then go back to bed?" She suggested. "We can talk this through in the morning after you've had some rest. "

"Yeah, okay. I think I could probably fall asleep now." He agreed as he took a sip from his milk. "Night, Doctor," She said as she moved to get back to bed.

"Night Sarah." He said back before taking another sip.

After Sarah Jane had left he took he stayed there for some time, thinking through everything that had been said and had happened the day before.

He sighed, knowing he really should go back to bed. He downed the last bit of his cooling milk and cleaned the cup, it would be difficult to clean it if he let it dry up and climbed up the stairs, careful again to be silent, still not wanting to wake anyone up.

He snuggled under the duvet again and found himself nodding off within minutes, less worried about the next day.