The various clocks of Los Angeles struck six on a brisk November morning. Well, brisk for southern California, that is. As if life were a cartoon, the sun rose over the urban horizon in an unrealistic instant and flooded the city with golden light. Many residents were already preparing for another busy day of creative work: Screenwriters for animated shows toiled away at their desks to come up with artistically-genius last-minute tweaks for their scripts, toon Thespians began their daily stretches to pull off their signature physical stunts with ease, and the many coffee shop workers of the city began grinding beans in anticipation of these groups' imminent demands for their morning caffeine fixes.
On this day, however, work seemed like an alien concept to three residents of a certain movie lot water tower. This wasn't just any November morning for Yakko, Wakko, and Dot Warner, the sibling stars of one of the most popular animated series of the century. No, this was the morning of the fourth: The birthday of the middle child, Wakko Warner.
*Ding-dong!*
Having previously installed a grandfather clock as a gag, Yakko and Dot were raised from their slumber by its sudden percussive strike and made some sudden last-minute preparations to surprise their brother. Wakko, on the other hand, had beaten them to it, as his uncontained excitement caused his internal clock to wake him as early as five. It took every ounce of willpower in his body not to wake his siblings right then and there, and an ounce more not to gobble up his birthday cake on the spot. It was a black forest cake, after all: his favorite flavor. The boy's solution was to lie in bed, restraining himself to the best of his limited ability, and eagerly count the seconds till his brother and sister woke up.
"Are you sure he's asleep?" Dot asked Yakko, worried that the birthday boy might have awoken already.
"Aw, don't worry, sis!" Yakko replied with a smug grin plastered on his face. "We both know Wakko loves to sleep in as late as possible. I'm positive we'll be the ones to wake him!"
Wakko, of course, heard every word, and giggled with amusement when his siblings' approaching footsteps quietly echoed through the tower. Still, he wanted their efforts to pay off, so Wakko pretended to be asleep as they made their way to his chamber. With a sudden swing of the door, Yakko and Dot flipped the lights on, blared their noisemakers, and fired off their military-grade confetti cannons.
"Happy birthday, Wakko!"
Able to "wake" at last, Wakko sprung from his bed and embraced his siblings in a giant hug. Moments like these are what he lived for: It wasn't like them to deal with constant rivalry, at least not to the extent they dealt with in character on the show. The Warners were truly inseparable.
"Faboo!" Wakko declared, a word which seemed nothing more than a simple catchphrase to casual fans, but one which spoke volumes of joy to those who knew him well. His siblings embraced him with equal joy, knowing fully what kind of day they were in for. In fact, Yakko and Dot had been planning this day for months, as they had a very special gift in store for their beloved brother.
"Well sibs, I may be a strong believer in a healthy diet," Yakko began, the stifled giggles from his brother and sister eliciting a smirk from the eldest sibling. "...but I don't think there's any better way to start off our morning than by enjoying a slice of birthday cake. Or several."
Wakko and Dot didn't think twice about racing each other to the kitchen, with Yakko following close behind. Before they knew it, more than half of the cake was gone, mostly due to Wakko's voracious appetite. The three of them soon found themselves relaxing together on the couch, finishing their accompanying glasses of juice while basking in the happy glow of the moment.
"Can I open my presents now? Can I? Can I?"
Dot giggled at her brother's uncontained excitement. While she certainly did her best to be the mature one of the family, she looked up to Wakko for the way he maintained his childlike enthusiasm over the years.
"Well, Wakko, we'd like to give you one particular present first," Dot replied.
"Yep!" followed Yakko. " Seeing as Dot and I spent the last few months saving up for this gift, I'm as eager as you are to see it opened."
Wakko was somewhat taken aback. "You...you spent months saving for this gift?"
"Yessir!" replied Yakko. "We've been pooling our allowance this whole time! And don't worry, we know for a fact you'll love it." The two of them shared a sly wink, knowing full well what was in store for their brother.
Taken aback once more, Wakko's mind wandered to a moment he shared with his siblings in the past year…
"Is it on?"
"Hold on, Yakko! I've...I've never tried this before, so I might need some time…"
"Ooh! Well, I certainly have some experience with fashion! Why don't I help?"
"No, Dot! I mean...this has to be a surprise! And, well...I've never been so nervous…"
Sharing a sigh, Yakko and Dot waited patiently outside the department store's fitting room. Wakko normally didn't take so long trying on new clothes: In fact, he preferred to stick with his usual sweater-hat combo no matter the occasion. He had also never expressed genuine anxiety over being seen in any outfit. Today was different, however. Wakko had scurried into the fitting room with his potential clothes tucked into a conveniently-opaque bag. causing intrigue among his siblings. Still, they remained outside, respecting their brother's wishes to remain concealed until the moment of his "big reveal."
On the other side of the door, Wakko was a nervous wreck. Wearing this particular piece of clothing was something he'd never even considered doing before today, but when he saw it on display across the aisle, practically begging for an appreciative wearer, Wakko was instantly captivated. It was exactly what he wanted, and he knew this in his heart.
Having finally slipped into this article of clothing, the little puppy boy admired himself in the mirror, almost moved by what he saw. His fear of mockery left him for a brief moment, and all that existed in his mind was the joy of wearing his chosen outfit. He could see himself wearing it anywhere and everywhere. Wakko knew full well how much this simple piece of fabric meant to him.
*Knock-knock!*
"Hellooooooo?" cooed Dot. "You sure you don't need help?"
"Yeah!" added Yakko. "You're taking an awfully long time in there, you know! Did you get distracted practicing your gookie?"
Wakko was torn from his euphoric state and swiftly brought back to earth. He knew there was no way of avoiding it: His siblings were going to see what he chose to wear, and he would be at the mercy of their judgment.
"A-actually...I've got it on now!"
"Well, let's see it, then!" Yakko responded.
Wakko's face was beet-red. This was the moment of truth. WIth a final gulp of anticipation, he gently opened the door and stood proud in front of his siblings, or at least as proud as he could be in that moment.
Yakko and Dot's eyes widened. Of all the possible outfits he could have worn, Wakko was standing in front of them wearing an adorable blue dress.
"It's...it's a little expensive, so I don't think I want to walk out with it today…" stammered Wakko.
The two of them were stunned. It was already unusual for their brother to care so much about clothes, but this? This was something different entirely. The dress was cut from some kind of silky-smooth, baby-blue polyester - conveniently durable for a rascal like Wakko, who was known for regularly tearing through sweaters during his usual mayhem - and it caught the light so perfectly as to lend its wearer a near-angelic aura. It had short sleeves - an unusual choice in style for him - and the flared bottom hem was relatively short, only reaching down to his knees. A crimson ribbon wrapped around the waist was tied up with a bow in the back area, though somehow its color did not clash with the dominant blue as one might have expected. The dress screamed "playful schoolchild." Yakko and Dot were so taken aback by the sight that it took them what seemed like an eternity to open their mouths. Fortunately for Wakko, once they did, all that escaped their lips was relentless positivity.
"Oh...my...god."
"It's perfect."
"You look gorgeous!"
"I couldn't have picked a better outfit myself!"
It was Wakko's turn to be stunned this time. "You...you like it?"
Dot smiled warmly. "Of course we do, big bro! Just look at you! I've never seen something so cute in all my life, and I'm the expert on all things cute!"
Yakko nodded like a grinning fool. "Yep, I'd say that's a winner! Not to mention that shade of blue is your perfect color!"
"And speaking of color, look! That red ribbon goes perfectly with your hat!"
Wakko almost slumped against the door from relief. He was so worried about what they'd think of him, but why? They loved him dearly, and they understood his tastes better than anyone. Of course they would love the dress!
Seeing his brother's relief, Yakko piped up again. "Why don't you give us a little twirl? You know, 'skirt go spinny' and all that!"
"It's a dress, Yakko," Dot interjected.
"Well, excuse me, miss fashion queen!" Yakko blew a playful raspberry at his sister, only to receive one in return.
Wakko's fear of their reactions had all but melted away at this point, so he honored their request and gave the cutest little twirl he could muster. Yakko and Dot clasped their hands together, practically moved by the sight of their brother. Yakko couldn't help himself: He picked up Wakko in the middle of the store and spun him around.
"My little brother, just look at you! I'm so proud, I could cry!"
If he weren't feeling self-conscious, Wakko would have wept with joy.
Wakko was suddenly brought down to Earth. He understood full well what his siblings had bought for him - even the wrapped-up box was the exact size. His jaw dropped, but that didn't stop him from tearing open the wrapping paper and lifting the lid. The very same dress he tried on at the store was staring back at him, professionally folded and wrinkle-free, its material catching the light as beautifully as it did when he first tried it on.
"I...I…" Wakko was dumbfounded. Never had his siblings put so much thought into one of his gifts.
"Well, why not try it on right now?" Dot suggested, Yakko nodding in agreement.
He didn't think twice and dashed off to his bedroom to try it on, reappearing in front of his siblings in a matter of seconds. Sharing a knowing glance, Yakko and Dot knew this was the right choice. Every sacrifice they'd made to find the necessary funds was worth the glowing expression on Wakko's face. Their brother was so overwhelmed with joy that he twirled around a dozen times, basking in the happiness brought to him by this simple piece of fabric. He could barely utter a single word through his childlike laughter.
"I just...don't know what to say."
"How about, 'thank you?'" interjected a snarky Yakko. It was Wakko's turn to blow a raspberry this time.
"I've never felt so happy wearing a piece of clothing. I just didn't know clothes could even bring so much happiness!" Wakko turned to Dot. "Is this how it feels to wear a dress like you do?"
"Well, yeah! Why do you think I'm always in a skirt, silly?" she replied.
All three siblings erupted in giggles together, followed by a warm, fuzzy hug.
"Gosh, Wak, you're so cute in that dress, I could just...gobble you up!"
Wakko's eyes widened at his brother's words. In their family, hearing the phrase "gobble you up" meant that Yakko was about to scoop up his siblings and tickle them silly, as he often did when overwhelmed with adoration for them. A dumbfounded Wakko noticed Dot shared the same "evil" expression as the eldest Warner: It looked like she was going to join in on the fun!
"Not unless you catch me first!" Wakko wriggled free of his siblings' grasp and darted across the massive water tower interior - it was larger on the inside, after all - as they gave chase, eventually cornering him in the dining room.
"Look at that defenseless cutie!" Dot cackled, her fingers wiggling in the air to tease him. "He's just asking for it, isn't he?"
"Oh, I think he is!" added Yakko. "Aw heck, in an adorable little dress like that, how could the tickle monster possibly say 'no?'"
Before Wakko could protest, Yakko scooped up the prematurely-giggling, wriggling puppy boy in his arms. Spying his pudgy tummy, Yakko couldn't resist giving it a tickle. Wakko squealed and snorted with laughter - much to the amusement of Dot - which only furthered Yakko's efforts. Truth be told, the middle Warner was quite body-conscious as he was a bit heavier than his siblings, but Yakko and Dot appreciated this facet of his design as just another thing that made him special. The heartfelt moment ended with Yakko carrying an exhausted yet gleeful Wakko to the couch once again, all three of them basking in the happy glow of the moment as they relaxed together. They would need to rest before the remaining celebrations, after all.
"Yakko? Dot? Are you still awake?"
It was pushing midnight, and the Warners were tuckered out after a long day of birthday festivities, each of them bundled up in matching onesies and wrapped in sleeping bags on the living room floor. They typically slept in their own rooms, but on special occasions like this, "indoor camping" was their preferred way of capping off the night. Wakko had something on his mind, however, but fortunately his siblings were as wide-awake as he was.
"Sure are, Wakko! What's going on?" Dot sweetly inquired.
Wakko gulped: This was going to be as difficult as wearing the dress for the first time, but it had to be done. He decided to spit it out and get it over with.
"Well, I...um...I don't know if I'm really your brother." Wakko slapped his own forehead, hardly believing his misdelivery of the line.
"What's up, Wak? Are you some kind of imposter?" said Yakko, employing his signature tongue-in-cheek snark.
"No, no! Nothing like that! I just...um…"
The tower was silent.
"...well, I don't know if I'm really a boy. I thought I was, but I'm not so sure." His siblings kept quiet, but Wakko knew from experience that they were listening intently. "I don't know if I'm a girl, either. All I know is, wearing that dress makes me feel whole, and 'whole' doesn't feel like being a boy."
Yakko and Dot were sitting up at this point, and Wakko followed suit.
"I just feel like who I am isn't bound to 'boy stuff' or 'girl stuff.'"
Two loving hands rested on the middle sibling's shoulders. Yakko piped up.
"You know, Wakko, you're a growing toon. This is the time to discover who you are, and embrace it with all your heart."
Dot spoke this time. "But no matter what, we love you. We love everything about you, including the Wakko you'll become."
Tears began to form in Wakko's eyes. "You're right, Dot, I am still Wakko...but could you guys start calling me 'they' for now? I mean, you can still call me 'he' sometimes, but I wanna use 'they' as well. Just, y'know, so I can 'try it on for size.'"
"Of course we can!" Yakko and Dot declared in unison. The two of them quickly launched into a mock conversation about their sibling.
"Aren't they so pretty in that dress?"
"Oh yeah. When I saw them try it on, I knew it was the one."
"It just suits them so perfectly!"
"Heck, how could it not? Wakko's perfect in every way - it makes sense that such a wonderful dress would compliment their wonderful personality!"
Wakko lost their cool: At this point, they were bawling.
"F-faboo!" they declared, and their siblings embraced them for yet another hug.
"You're my whole world, Wakko," Yakko whispered to them.
"And you're my world, too," Dot added. "We love you so, so much."
An adoring Wakko looked up at their siblings through the tears in their eyes. "I love you too, guys. Always."
It was the happiest day of Wakko's life.
Author's Note:
Some readers have inquired as to why Wakko is only referred to with they/them pronouns in the final scene rather than throughout the story. There are two reasons for this: Firstly, the narration reflects Wakko's chosen pronouns at the time they are used. Internally, Wakko refers to themself as he/him up until the closing scene, at which point they come to the realization that their pronouns are they/them, thus altering the pronouns used in the narration. Secondly, as stated in the story, Wakko uses he/they and they/them pronouns interchangeably. Within the context of this fan fiction, to refer to them as he/him is not an act of misgendering.