Wonk uoy naht noitceffa erom deen I…
A young woman's voice, but it might as well have been my own, or Roxas's.
I need more affection than you know.
But what do Nobodies know about affection?
Snoitome eurt deen I.
I need true emotions.
I'm drowning. Why am I drowning? I don't want to drown.
I want to burn!
I want to burn everything.
I want to burn everyone.
Everyone, except Roxas.
I want to burn it all.
I —
"Axel!" I opened my eyes to see Roxas's soft face leaning over me, a concerned look plastered all over it.
"Huh? Did I miss something? Did I oversleep?"
"No, not at all. But I saw you were tossing and turning, and I thought there was something wrong, so I called out your name a couple of times to wake you up." How sweet of you.
"Eh, it was nothing," I lied. I've had weird dreams before, but ever since Roxas joined the Organization, they've been happening more frequently. I'm not sure what to make of them.
"If you say so," said Roxas, not quite believing me.
"You ready to head out to Traverse Town?" I asked, changing the subject.
"Well, I need to see Zexion first. You can go on without me."
"But I'd rather be with you," I groaned teasingly. "Fine. I'll go see Saïx to convince him to have me join you on your mission this time."
"Sounds like a plan," Roxas smiled cheekily.
I arrived at the Grey Area to a rather tired-looking Saïx.
"What's the matter with you? You look like you've stayed up all night."
"I have," answered Saïx groggily. "I was discussing an important matter with Xemnas, the details of which I'm not at liberty to divulge. Anyway —"
"Could you at least give me a little hint?" I teased.
"It's about Roxas," Saïx sighed. "Xemnas will need to see him tomorrow, as this is something he will only discuss with him and no one else. That's why I spent so much time talking to him last night — I wanted to gain a better insight on the boy myself, but the Superior wouldn't budge. Now, what do you want?" I was about to answer when he put his hand up to interrupt me. "Wait, don't tell me. You want to accompany Roxas on his mission, like you did last time, even though I told you not to?"
"How did you — ?"
"Don't ask. Xemnas has eyes and ears everywhere, so nothing truly escapes him and, therefore, me."
"Creepy."
"You can say that again. But to answer your question: Fine, suit yourself."
"Really?" I asked, more than a little baffled by Saïx's sudden generosity.
"Don't make me change my mind. I know the two of you have grown… close, and I reasoned that having Roxas do all the heavy lifting alone is not nearly as efficient as having him do all that with you around. So, consider this my… treat."
For once, I didn't hate Saïx. Just for once. I'd still hate him every other day, but today was a rare exception, and I intended to keep it that way. The last thing Roxas needed was me on a bad day.
Traverse Town was a world trapped in perpetual dusk, never quite properly night but so tantalizingly close to it. Rumor had it that a boy named Sora (the same Sora that Aladdin kid mistook Roxas for, perhaps?) wiped out the Heartless in this world, but after he vanished an unknown time ago, they came back with a vengeance. So, Roxas and I wasted no time acting discreet; we came in guns blazing — or Keyblade and chakrams blazing, to be more accurate.
On damn near every street corner, we saw packs of the typical Shadow swarmers but also their tougher armored cousins, the Emblem Heartless. From what I caught off the corner of my eye, Roxas wore an unusually intense expression — focused, clear, unambiguous in its intent: He was here to kill. I never thought I'd see it on the same kid that I'd grown so close to, but there it was. It was almost jarring, but at the end of the day, Roxas was still one of us. He quickly wiped the floor with a bunch of Shadows, his footing much more secure than when we started. How rapidly Roxas had grown in just three days. It would've brought a tear to my eye — that is, if I could still cry. I lost that ability years ago. But enough about me — nearly a dozen Heartless charged at us.
Fifteen minutes turned to an hour, and an hour became five, but there were still more of them coming our way. Roxas and I had managed to cut down nearly a hundred of the swarmers already from the last time I counted. I was getting pretty annoyed with how aggressive these creatures had become lately, and I figured to ask Roxas as much as we continued slaying one after another.
"Hey, Roxas!" I shouted over the din?"
"Yeah? What is it?"
"Have you noticed something… off about the swarmers lately?"
"Like how they seem to just attack us on sight?"
"That, and the damn things seem really eager about it too."
"I've noticed," Roxas confirmed as he cut down another one.
"Do you suppose it has something to do with that Keyblade of yours?"
"Zexion told me that the Heartless fear the Keyblade because it's an 'instrument of light,' as he put it."
"They don't seem very afraid to me," I smirked, burning a couple of Emblems with a snap of my fingers.
"You can say that again!" Roxas agreed.
Every day, I'm amazed at how we Nobodies are nearly as inexhaustible as the Heartless we've slain for ten years. I don't think the Heartless will ever become an endangered species no matter how aggressively we hunt them down. Sometimes, I think it's easier to imagine the inevitable heat death of the universe than the extinction of the Heartless — that's how much of a constant they've been in our lives.
Our sixth hour in this miserable place was close at hand, but thankfully, the swarmers' numbers had dwindled enough to where I thought burning through what remained — for now — wouldn't do too much harm to Roxas's mission (he already released more than the allotted 100 — Saïx sure loved to raise the stakes!). Besides, I had grown kind of bored and wanted ice cream. I also thought of a surprise during our time spent in this dismal world, and I imagined it'd brighten both of our days.
"Let's burn the last of 'em, shall we?" I grinned.
"Be my guest," Roxas winked. He called out, "Light!" and I snapped my fingers, incinerating nearly two dozen Heartless in an instant, but not before Roxas struck at least half of them with his Keyblade. Damn, he was good!
Roxas made me feel something altogether new about this whole Kingdom Hearts project: hope. I felt hopeful that it was really going to succeed with our resident Keyblade wielder.
The idea for the surprise came to me pretty suddenly: I remembered that Roxas wanted us to go see a pair of musicians — a flutist and harpist — play this pretty little tune that he whistled to me a while ago. I decided that instead of our usual spot, we were going to listen to the players while we ate ice cream — a slight change of scenery, but nothing too dramatic.
Roxas and I went through the usual motions up until we got our ice cream, at which point I gently grabbed his free hand and pulled him along with me.
"Hey, where are you taking us? The Clocktower's that way," Roxas protested, motioning with his ice cream bar.
"I have a surprise for you. I think you might like it," I reassured him. That managed to reduce his resistance.
When I could hear the familiar tune faintly playing in the distance, I knew we were getting close.
I was as surprised as Roxas was when we arrived: In addition to the flutist and harpist, there was also a cellist and pianist, each supplying their own melody, contributing to a fuller-sounding song. The cello almost whined against the flute, while the piano backed the harp, which plucked away loud and clear.
"Wow," Roxas sighed breathlessly. "I almost forgot about this."
"I'm sure you'll have that memorized for a very long time now that you get to experience it for yourself," I said.
"Yeah, you've got that right. Thank you. So much," he said, looking down. That made me raise an eyebrow.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"Nothing. It's just that I almost don't know how to fell about this." In a way, you can't.
"I guess that's what people call 'joy.' When you're so happy that words escape you."
"I ought to fell that more often."
"What's the usual feeling?" I asked, curious.
"Um, numbness, I guess. Oh, and boredom."
"Ha, I often felt that way before you arrived."
"Heh, am I really so interesting to you?"
"Of course! And I'm not the only one either. Zexion seems to have taken an interest in you as well. And I bet if you went a little out of your comfort zone and talked to, say, Demyx, he might turn out to be interested in you too."
"That's a lot of people interested in me."
"It's only three people, Roxas. You still have nine more to consider, you know."
"True."
"Anyway, I won't be able to see you tomorrow," I said that perhaps a little too flippantly, which Roxas quickly noticed.
"You won't? Why not?" he asked, visibly worried.
"Uh, because Xemnas needs to see you. Can't tell you why because I don't know why. He just does. When Xemnas needs to see you, you see him, no questions asked. Got it memorized?"
"Am I in trouble? Did I not released enough Heartless?"
"Listen, Roxas, I just told you: I. Don't. Know. Got it memorized? But if I were to venture a guess, it has nothing to do with being in trouble or displeasing our Superior, especially because you've been performing so well. You're a natural, Roxas — better than some of us who've been at it for ten years. Don't worry about it, buddy. Now, eat your ice cream — it's melting!"
"Oh, yeah," Roxas said.
We continued to listen to the quartet playing their song before we made our return to the Castle.