Eleanor had been waiting for that day for so long that she thought she would feel a lot better than she did.
She finally wasn't the Greenie anymore.
However, showing the new Greenie around wasn't exactly how she had planned on spending her day.
Alby had still been the one who gave him the tour, as was customary. But, apparently, it was sort of a tradition for the old Greenie to help the new-comer.
She had squinted her eyes at Alby when he had told her.
"Well, that's funny." She had said, "No one bothered to mention that fact when I arrived."
Alby had given her that look. That Alby look that said he was done with you.
She didn't feel like arguing with him so she did as she was told.
The Greenbean had come up early in the morning, asking more questions that she thought anyone was capable of asking.
Most boys had been hoping it was another girl, something she had overheard more than one boy saying. But no one wanted it more than she did.
Instead, she got to walk around with the living proof that she continued to be the only girl amongst that army of boys.
The newbie was called Pablo. She guessed he was around sixteen. He was tall and slender but looked decently strong non-the-less. She was sure he'd find a decent job soon enough.
She had promised herself she would be nice to him, because she vividly remembered how much she could have used that when she had come up in the box a month before. It was proving to be a lot easier said than done.
He didn't react like she thought all newbies would. He certainly did not react the way she had. He didn't look scared or shaken up like she had been. He seemed constantly angry and he was down-right rude and demanding. It was more than unnerving, and he made Eleanor really nervous. It was like walking a time-bomb around.
She then thought she could introduce him to Gally. They'd make a lovely pair.
Still, she braced herself with as much patience as she could muster and managed to hold of until lunch.
As soon as they both had their lunch plates, she made her way over to the table where most Track-hoes were eating lunch and she cleared her throat.
They all looked up, surprised.
"Guys." She started, "This is Pablo."
Zart raised his eyebrows at her, questioning. She ignored it.
"Pablo, these are Zart, Mark, Leo, Louis and David."
He nodded letting her know he'd heard her.
"Okay, bye." She quickly said.
And left, ignoring the protest behind her back.
She was more than certain Zart was going to kill her but she didn't really care. She was so glad she had freed herself.
She smiled as she made her way outside to eat under the sun.
Thankfully, none of them followed her outside.
That night there was a bonfire, just like when she had come up in the box.
So much had changed over the course of that last month that she felt like a completely different person. She felt better and worse at the same time.
After she showered, washing the sweat and dirt from her run, she put on her nicest set of clothes. Well, they weren't specially nice, but they were her favourite: a pair of dark jeans that were the ones that fit her best and a green cargo jacket that she carried around in her arm for when the night got colder. Then, she wore a simply black tank top they she never usually wore because it made her feel self-concious.
But today things felt different, it almost excited her. She wasn't the Greenie anymore.
She had even managed to find a pair of old worn out black boots that were quite loose on her feet. Aside from that, they were definitely an improvement from the wrecked trainers she usually wore, which looked like they were falling apart after all her runs in the woods.
Excitement was in the air. She could feel it. Gladers were running around and laughing everywhere. It was contagious.
When she exited the showers, Minho was still keeping guard, true to his word.
"Well," He spoke when he spotted her, "Don't you look nice?"
She doubted it was true but she blushed anyway.
"Thanks, Min."
"I know I look ravishing. You don't have to point it out." He said, his infamous smirk invading his face.
Eleanor laughed. "You always do, Minho. You always do."
"Thanks," He replied, "I know."
They started making their way to the centre of the glade where the boys had already lit the fire.
"By the way, Greenie." He spoke as they walked. "Love the shirt."
He added a wink for desired effect. She blushed.
"You're not allowed to call me Greenie anymore, rememeber?"
He chuckled.
"Right..." After a dramatic pause he added, "Shank."
She rolled her eyes.
"Ugh." She groaned, shoving him as they continued walking, "You're impossible."
"Impossibly good-looking you mean."
That made her laugh, "More like impossibly insuferable."
"Ouch." He said as he put his hand over his heart.
She just laughed and blew him a kiss walking ahead of him.
When they made it to the bonfire, Minho set his hands on her arms, lead her to an empty wood stump and sat her down.
"Wait here, m'lady."
She snorted as he took off and left her. She had no idea what he was going to do but with Minho you never knew.
The only thing left for her to do was sit there and wait for him to come back.
She looked around. Almost every single member of the glade was scattered around the fire. Some gladers were playing some beats and a few of them were dancing. She laughed starting to feel giddier. Watching teenage boys dance was a lot more amusing than she would've thought.
When Minho got back, he was holding to jars filled with a golden liquid. He carried a smile on his face which made Eleanor squint her eyes in suspicion. Minho rarely smiled.
When he took a seat next to her and before he got any chance to pass her a jar, she quickly spoke.
"I'm not drinking that."
"What?" He said, taken aback, the smile falling from his lips. "Why not?"
"It looks like pee." She replied with a grimace.
He scoffed
"You're such a girl." He said.
She slightly gasped, offended.
She hated when the boys said stuff like that, like it was a bad thing being a 'girl'.
"Is that meant to insult me?"
"C'mon," He pleaded, "Just try it."
He handed her one of the jars. She didn't miss the detail that it was one that was less full.
She sighed but took it in her hand. She inspected it through the light as if expecting to see something suspicious.
"What is it, anyway?" She questioned Minho.
He groaned, and rolled his eyes. "Would you just drink it?"
He had already drowned down two long sips and he seemed fine.
She tentativily raised the border of the glass to her lips and took a small sip.
All the different outcomes that had run through her mind did not prepare her for the burning sesation in her mouth and throat as she swallowed. She soon regretted doing so. The shock of such bitter drink made her cough repeatedly.
Minho patted her back, laughing.
"How can you drink that?" She said accusingly.
He chuckled. "Trust me, after one drink, you'll be begging for more."
She looked at her drink, very unsure, but she lifted it again. A second chance never hurt anyone.
When she had finished her jar, Minho had already drowned abount three of them.
She felt slightly dizzy so she declined when he offered her another.
A few runners had joined them aswell, and they spent a good amount of time sharing embarrasing stories about eachother. Eleanor couldn't remember ever laughin so hard.
None of them dared to tell a bad thing about Minho, even though he had his fair share of stories about the others. She guessed they didn't want to get on his bad side. She didn't blame them one bit. After all, if there was something everyone knew about her friend was how short-tempered he was. And those boys worked for him so she bet they knew him better than anyone.
Suddenly, Minho stood up, making Ben fall quiet.
They all looked up at him. Minho had clearly had more than enough to drink and had gotten bored of sitting down.
"C'mon." He told Eleanor, "Let's dance."
She laughed, "What?"
He grabbed one of her arms and started pulling, "C'mooooon."
She laughed again but let him drag her away.
"I don't dance, Minho."
He smirked and slowly inched toward her ear as they walked to where the music, if it was even considered that, sounded. She slightly shivered as she felt his hot breath in her ear. She felt herself blushing.
"Neither do I." He whispered, making her laugh once again.
She felt all eyes on them as Minho attempted to dance, which basically looked like him flailing his arms around and moving his head.
Eleanor couldn't stop laughing, but she felt her cheeks boiling from all the attention they were getting. Her eyes locked with Alby's and then Newt's beside him. She looked away embarrassed.
But then Minho grabbed her hands and started spinning her around, making her forget about the world around them.
By the time Minho got tired of dancing, Eleanor was so out of breath she had to take a moment to recompose herself. Her stomach hurt so much from laughing she thought she would be sore the next day.
The rest of the gladers had all mostly moved away to watch some of them wrestling. She could see them crowding around a few meters from them.
Minho seemed to have his attention on them too when she looked up at him. He returned her gaze and nodded his head towards them.
"Let's go." He said.
Eleanor's smile fell from her lips. She knew Gally was there and she really didn't want to be within ten meters of him.
However, Minho had already started walking that way and she didn't really feel like going to bed.
She convinced herself nothing bad could happen and followed Minho to the group of boys. They stood next to the rest of the runners.
Much to Eleanor's displeasure, Gally was in the middle shoving around another builder.
She frowned. She could think of a million better things to be doing at that moment.
"Wanna try, Eleanor?" She heard Ben say to her right over all the noise.
She shook her head, snorting. "Not a chance."
He laughed, "What about you, Minho?"
Minho smirked, "I could kick all your asses blindfolded."
Eleanor and Ben both laughed. She knew Minho loved to brag about his abilities but she did not doubt he was more than capable of beating the rest of the boys. He was the keeper of the runners after all.
"I think we have a volunteer." A voice said in front of them.
Eleanor closed her eyes tightly for a moment and cursed Minho's loud speaking.
She slowly opened her eyes to reveal Gally standing over them. He did not look at her but that didn't stop a shiver from running through her body.
Gally was bigger than Minho but the later did not seemed fazed.
"Are you sure, Gally?" Minho took a step forward.
Eleanor had the urge to kill Minho right then. Why did he have to be so goddamn proud? She knew he wasn't one to back up first so she predicted none of that could end well at all.
Gally backed away into the circle, signalling around with his arms, giving Minho space to join him.
Minho didn't stop smirking as he walked forward ready to face the challenge but Eleanor shot forward and grabbed his arm.
She couldn't watch her only friend fight him.
She wasn't even sure which one of them would win but she really didn't want to find out.
"Min, don't do this." She said quietly, but everyone was focused on her action so she was sure they all heard her. She didn't care, she didn't mind looking like a whiny idiot as long as she could stop what was unravelling.
"Why don't you listen to your girlfriend, huh? Shank?" Gally's voice held so much bitterness she felt her gut clentching.
She didn't tear her gaze away from Minho, trying to ignore the taller boy in front of them. But she knew it was a lost fight, Minho glared at Gally with such passion she was surprised Gally didn't flinch. It didn't take long before a wicked smirk covered his face again. She thought she didn't like the look of that smirk. It wasn't like the one he usually wore. It seemed meaner.
"Jealous, shuck-face?" He spat at Gally.
Eleanor's breath caught in her throat. Gally let out a bitter laugh.
"You can enjoy my leftovers." He said spitefully, "I've already tried that and I'm not impressed."
Her breathing stopped all together, his words twisting like a knife inside her heart.
Time seemed to stand still as she stared at him not believing her ears.
She felt Minho shaking with rage next to her but she was faster. She took a step forward and slapped her palm across his face with as much strengh as she could.
How dare he? Who did he think he was to talk to her like that? She had shared her deepest fears with him. He had held her as she cried herself to sleep. They had stayed up for hours talking about everything. How could that same boy treat her that way, infront of everyone else? That was something she didn't think she could ever forgive.
She felt some gladers inching closer, alert to what was going to happen, ready to break up any fight. Eleanor did not plan of staying.
"Fuck you." She spat, channeling all she felt into those two words.
She waited to see some form of reaction in Gally's eyes but she saw nothing but anger.
She felt the tears in her own eyes and turned quickly, pushing boys aside as she walked away. The last thing she wanted was to let them see her breaking down.
She wasn't sure where to go. She just knew she had to keep walking.
The tears cascading down her face made it difficult for her to see but she kept walking.
The boys were yelling where she'd left them, arguing about something. She didn't care. She kept walking.
She heard Alby shouting for them to shut up and go to bed. She kept walking.
She heard someone run after her, shouting her name, shouting for her to stop. She kept walking.
She didn't stop until Minho was right there in front of her, standing in her way. She ducked her head down hoping to hide her face.
"Eleanor." He said softly.
She didn't look up.
"Eleanor." He repeated a bit louder.
She snapped her head up.
"What? What?! Why can't you just leave me alone?!"
She immediately regretted her words but the damage was done. She bit her lip, hating herself for the pained look on his face.
It soon turned into a scowl.
"Well, excuse me for trying to help!" He snapped back.
She closed her eyes. She really didn't need that, specially then of all times.
He frowned and let out an angry scoff.
"Goodnight, Eleanor." His voice sounded so harsh it made her let out a pained sigh.
He left her there, hurting.
She felt miserable. The best night in the glade so far had turned into something out of her nightmares.
How could something good turn completely around in just a few minutes?
She hated Gally. She hated him with a burning passion.
And she hated herself.
She shouldn't have snapped at Minho like that. He had just been trying to help and she had ruined everything as usual. He'd probably hate her.
Maybe it was for the best. Maybe she wasn't meant to have friends in that hell hole. It had proven to be the perfect way not to get hurt. Maybe not being lonely wasn't worth feeling so bad.
Her whole body felt tired as she slowly walked forward once more.
She barely had any control of her own body. She found herself inside to showers, suddenly. It was a good hideout. No one went inside at night.
She turned one of the showers on and sat on the floor. The water splashed against her head but she didn't mind. The coldness was almost soothing in a way. The water mixed with her tears as she brought her knees up and hugged them.
Eventually, she turned off the water flow but she stayed there, not wanting to move. She felt her body shivering but she didn't have the strengh to move.
She unexpectedly heard the door open and her eyes moved in search of the sound.
Newt came into the showers panting, like he had been running. As soon as he saw her, he gave a big sigh of relief.
"We've been looking everywhere for you." He spoke loudly, a tone of reproach tinting his voice.
She flinched at the loud sound.
He felt silent.
Sighing once again, he took off his jacket and crouched down to her level. She tried to look away, embarrassed, but his pained eyes were drawing her in. He set the jacket on her soaked shoulders and helped her up.
"C'mon," He said, "You should get changed and get some sleep."
He spoke a lot quieter now, almost in a whisper, as if he was afraid he would break her.
She felt too tired to feel pathetic, but still, she felt the need to apologize.
"I'm sorry, Newt." She said, just as quietly.
As she let him guide her, all she could think about was how useless she continued to be.
It always seemed to end up with someone cleaning up her mistakes because she was too emotional to do it herself.
It had to stop. She had to try.
No more crying. She needed to be strong.
They don't cry. You shouldn't cry either.
No more tears.
No more tears...