Regarding Harry
by Tsujton
Disclaimer: Anything recognizable from the Harry Potter Universe belongs to J.K. Rowling et al. I make no profit (story of my life…).
Summary: Harry destroys the last Horcrux and defeats Voldemort – but in doing so, winds up back where he started the night he got his scar: with the mind of a fifteen month old – big baby!Harry. But the Death Eaters are out for revenge… Slightly slashy. Some abuse and violence, so rated: M
A/N: 1. I capitalized 'Nurse' because JKR does so with 'Healer' and I feel both jobs are equally important. 2. Look for obscure references to the original Star Trek series and The Monkees.
Chapter 7: Back To Hogwarts
When they stopped before the great doors, Harry looked over Hagrid's shoulder and spied Draco. "Pi-ee Boy!" he exclaimed and wriggled out of Hagrid's arms. He crawled to reach the unaware blond whose head was bowed. Grinning, Harry grasped onto the sleeve of Draco's robe to pull himself up by. It tore loose and Harry fell back, flat on his bottom, his bare legs sticking out from beneath his robes. He looked hard at the dark cloth in his hand, his mouth set in anger as if the sleeve had deliberately meant to wrong him.
Draco raised his lids, startled and Harry met his eyes. "Harry…" he whispered hoarsely and lowered them again. The fact that his exposed arm no longer bore the Dark Mark did not even register through his despair. Ron pulled Draco back away from Harry and Draco nearly lost his balance.
Harry sniffed at the sleeve and gave it a new look – one of approval. He clutched it to his chest and gathered his knees under himself starting towards Draco again. Hagrid reached to help Harry up. "C'mon, Harry, we're goin' in t' the castle."
"No," said Harry, jutting his lip out and frowning.
Ginny stared at Harry for a moment, her expression inscrutable. "I can't believe I'm going to do this," she muttered under her breath, then said brightly, "Harry, want a sugar cube?" She tucked her knife into her belt and raised the lid of the sugar bowl to pull out a lump. Harry half-turned his head to look back at her, his glower fading. Ginny held up the white cube and licked her lips. Harry's mouth twitched a bit and he lifted his chin. Then he opened his mouth with a begrudging look, accepted the sweet and turned his head away again while he ate it.
Despite herself, Ginny had to stifle a laugh. "Okay, we're going in now," she said brooking no argument. Hagrid lifted the now unresisting Harry and everyone fell into step behind Ginny. In that moment, even Hagrid could spot the strong resemblance between Ginny and her mother: the indomitable Molly Weasley.
"Er, Ron?" asked Hagrid surreptitiously, needing to lean down despite Ron's famed height. "What's happened to Harry's trousers?" Ron paled considerably when he remembered what they had used to fashion a nappy for Harry.
"Uh, erm…" was all he could eke out. Hermione came to his rescue (and Ron really felt that she should, given that it had been her idea in the first place).
"Hagrid. The fact is that Harry's pants were …soiled. We had to use your pillow case as a nappy – sorry."
"Na' the striped one?"
"Uh, 'fraid so," squeaked Ron, swallowing.
"Blimey, Harry. Try t'hold it in. Tha' one's m'favorite."
The weathered but ever-sturdy doors of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry opened of their own accord to admit them. Angry voices could be heard inside. The group stopped as one to listen and Hagrid made to set Harry down.
"Ahgi, uppies," said Harry nervously, and he practically cleaved to Hagrid who lifted him up again.
As it turned out, the Unspeakables from the Department of Mysteries had detected an unexplained surge of magic emanating from the Forbidden Forest and going as far as Hogwarts castle. They had arrived, led by Cyril Croaker to investigate even before Professor Flitwick had had time to fire-call the Ministry.
Professor, and now Headmistress, Minerva McGonagall's voice could be heard rising above and quashing all others. "I don't care who arrived here first and I don't give a rodent's posterior as to whose jurisdiction this falls under! I just want it solved. You –" she pointed to the head Auror "– are a little old for House rivalry, Ms. Portman, and as for you, Mr. Croaker," she turned sharply to the senior Unspeakable, "I haven't forgotten why I had to take three-hundred-points from Gryffindor in your fourth year! Now will you kindly and quietly work together and get some answers!" The gathering of Aurors and Unspeakables just stood in stunned silence in the wake of the Headmistress' tirade. "That was NOT a request!" she shouted fiercely, and spun on her heel with a grace that belied her age, leaving in her wake rumblings of shame-filled apologies from her former pupils.
The two leaders moved off to join their teams, which stood on either side of a wheelbarrow filled to the brim with the wands Hagrid had gathered earlier. They spoke quietly and several people on both sides nodded – apparently having received instructions – and moved off.
Now the Headmistress was pointed to the new arrivals. "My word…" she was muttering under her breath. "Oh, Hagrid," she said upon seeing him carrying Harry Potter and flanked by Hermione Granger, Ronald and Ginerva Weasley and – she was about to greet them and inquire as to why Mr. Potter was being carried when she saw the last of this group – Draco Malfoy. Her eyes turned to steel. "Draco Malfoy," her voice was vituperative. "Hagrid, explain yourself! What do you mean by bringing a Death Eater into Hogwarts? How did he get past the wards? Does this have something to do with the overheated wands?" As she fired off her questions Harry fearfully wriggled out of Hagrid's grasp and half-hid behind him on the stone floor.
"Actually Prof- er, Headmistress, it's these three who'd be best t'answer yeh," and Hagrid gestured to Hermione and the Weasleys.
The Headmistress had nearly forgotten they were there in her outrage at seeing the former Hogwarts student who had plotted to kill her predecessor and friend, Albus Dumbledore. In the end young Malfoy had not done it, though he had managed to let a small band of Death Eaters enter the castle proper. No one had heard from or seen either Draco Malfoy or his accomplice, Professor Severus Snape (ex-Professor Snape, she reminded herself grimly, the man who had succeeded in killing Dumbledore), since that dreadful night the previous year. "My apologies, Ms. Granger, Ms. Weasley, Mr. Weasley, Mr. Potter," and she nodded curtly to each in turn. "For not giving you a proper greeting. We've just had a most terrible incident and are in the midst of –" and here her eyes flicked scathingly to the cluster of Ministry officers and her voice lowered "– trying to sort it ou– are you quite alright, Mr. Potter?" He was peering out from behind Hagrid's boot and she found his behavior a bit disconcerting. She had to lean to the side to get a better view of Harry, who in turn hid even farther behind Hagrid.
"Headmistress, we have much to tell you," said Hermione. "May we go somewhere more private?" She shifted her own eyes meaningfully toward the few women and men who still remained by the wheelbarrow and who seemed to still be having some difficulty in cooperating.
Noting their continued discord, the Headmistress said under her breath, "It's as if they never grew up." She shook her head in exasperation and turned back to Hermione. "Of course, Ms. Granger. If you'll please follow me." Minerva McGonagall had known Hermione Granger long enough to realize that when she had something to say it was informative at the least and – more often than not – illuminating.
"Headmistress, I think Hagrid ought to take Harry up to the hospital wing – I'll explain that, too," Hermione added to forestall her former professor's questions.
""I'm going with Harry," said Ginny.
"D'you want me to come with you, 'Mione," asked Ron.
Hermione felt she could have kissed him right then and there in front of the Headmistress and everyone, but instead she said gratefully, "Yes."
"Let's go, Malfoy," Ron said to the shamefaced boy.
"Just a moment, Mr. Weasley. I shall have the Aurors take Mr. Malfoy into custody." She made to signal Ms. Portman but Hermione stopped her.
"Please wait, Professor McGonagall. I think you need to hear what Draco has to say as well." The mystery of Draco's unmarked forearm had not gone unnoticed by the sharp-eyed young witch, but as she was still contemplating its precise meaning she hadn't yet brought it to the attention of her comrades.
"Very well," The elder witch did not attempt to hide the disapproval imbedded in her consent. "But I'll ask that Professor Slughorn join us. I do not wish to hear anything that boy has to say without a hearty dose of Veritaserum. I shall Floo for him from my office. Follow me, please," and then she paused and turned to Draco. "But rest assured, Mr. Malfoy, that when you are through I shall have the Aurors escort you from the premises – no doubt to Azkaban to await trial for your incomprehensible deeds."
As they followed the Headmistress, Hermione called over her shoulder to Ginny, "Don't let Madam Pomfrey bully you and Hagrid into leaving Harry."
"Just let her try…" answered Ginny darkly.
Harry had ventured further out from the safety of Hagrid's bulk in time to see the group leave, with Ron guiding Draco by the elbow. "Pi-ee Boy," he said as made to follow.
"Come up, Harry," said Hagrid, easily lifting him. "Yeh got ter say G'bye to Draco, now."
Harry quite liked being held by Hagrid but he still didn't want to be separated from Draco. This conflict of emotions brought on a fresh wave of tears and Harry clung to Hagrid's neck, watching Draco go over the great man's shoulder and whispering piteously, "Pi-ee Boy, no bye-bye…"
By the time the trio arrived at the hospital wing, Harry had quieted, wide eyes taking in his new surroundings. Only a small queue of students – all holding their injured wand hands by the wrist – remained. They were standing at the back of the ward where a Trainee Healer in lime green robes from St. Mungo's was incanting spells.
"Mr. Potter, you're not even a student here this year, and still you manage to need the services of the hospital wing?" Madam Pomfrey, Hogwarts stalwart Nurse, addressed Harry in clipped tones but the look on her face was warm and welcoming. Harry looked down at her from his perch on Hagrid's hip and smiled shyly. The Nurse saw the large, puckered scab on his forehead and when next she spoke, Poppy Pomfrey's voice was all business-like. "What's wrong? What has happened?" She instinctively reached for her absent wand, only to remember in frustration that it was not safe to use anyway. Without another word she rushed into her office and returned with another wand, slamming her door (paying no heed to the outraged cry from within of "Wha–? Poppy!") and sending locking and silencing spells on it over her shoulder.
As Hagrid was clearly intimidated by the Nurse (he was innocuously eyeing the ceiling), it fell to Ginny to explain. She was fully aware that her explanation would pale in comparison to the one she imagined Hermione was currently giving Professor McGonagall, but she plowed forth anyways, trying her best to include only the most salient points: Harry was in a battle, he was stabbed in the scar with an old basilisk tooth, his memory was questionable, and his behaviour was like that of an infant. Before arriving at the castle, the group had agreed that it was best not to reveal what had happened with the Dark Lord and the Horcrux until receiving Professor McGonagall's council.
When Ginny had finished, Madam Pomfrey took a cleansing breath. "Bring him here at once," she ordered, and Hagrid rushed to set Harry on the cot she'd indicated.
Harry tried to cling to Hagrid and the half-giant whispered, "Y'have t'set down on yer own there now, Harry. I'm too big."
"Out of my way, Rubeus," bristled Madam Pomfrey, and as Hagrid jumped quickly back, Harry grabbed for him anxiously but missed. He shrank back from Madam Pomfrey who was holding the appropriated wand over him and muttering a stream of diagnostic spells under her breath.
Ginny hastily set the sugar bowl on the bedside table and sat next to Harry taking his hand in hers. "It's okay, Harry. Madam Pomfrey is a very nice witch." At this, the 'very nice witch' barely suppressed a very loud snort. Ginny chose to ignore her and continued trying to comfort Harry. Harry raised his eyebrows at Ginny and looked hopefully over at Hagrid's sugar bowl, sucking his lower lip.
"Please remove his outer robe, Ms. Weasley," directed the Nurse absently before continuing her spell casting.
"Let's get this off, Harry," said Ginny reaching for his clasp. Harry drew back from her. "Oh, all right. Fine. Sugar cube?" Harry sat back up with interest as Ginny removed the chipped ceramic lid and took out another pleasing white lump. He looked pensively from Madam Pomfrey to Ginny to the proffered sweet.
"Moh," he said coyly and opened his mouth for Ginny. Now all his thoughts were on the delicious sensation of the melting sugar on his tongue and he paid no notice to Ginny unclasping his robe and shirt buttons, sliding the clothes off his shoulders and lifting his arms out of the sleeves one at a time.
"What is that he's wearing, Ms. Weasley? Is that a – a pillow case?" Madam Pomfrey asked incredulously.
"Was m'favorite one, too," grumbled Hagrid from across the room where he had retreated to.
"Erm, he sort of needs nappies now," Ginny said flushing slightly.
"Mr. Potter is NOT a house-elf!" exclaimed Madam Pomfrey. "Just a moment," she said, regaining her composure, "I've had enough first year bed-wetters to keep a supply of Auntie Grizelda's Self-Cleaning Nappies on hand," and she conjured one onto Harry's cot. "Oh," she said, wrinkling her nose. "I think a thorough Scourgify is in order, first." As she did the spell Harry got a sudden look of surprise on his face and shifted uncomfortably on the cot at the strange sensation. Ginny blushed deeply and turned away as the Nurse magically removed the pillowcase and spelled the nappy onto Harry who squirmed further, adjusting to the new garment.
"This is most unusual," began Madam Pomfrey, and Ginny jerked her head back turning even redder. "Not the nappy, Ms. Weasley. Please, show a little maturity – we all have natural bodily functions." She waved her wand again and then Harry was wearing crisp, white hospital pajamas. "No, I was speaking of Mr. Potter's condition. I will have to consult wi– Oh, I almost forgot!" She quickly turned and waved the wand at the door of her office canceling her earlier spells. It swung open with such force that it banged on the wall and rattled in its hinges. A red-faced woman with a long black plait strode out. Gathering her dignity she drew herself up and straightened the front of her lime green robes.
"Poppy Pomfrey, if you ever –" she began.
"Rose, a modicum of professionalism is in order here," Madam Pomfrey interjected sternly, gesturing to Harry and Ginny with her eyes. Then she continued on as if nothing untoward had just happened. "Hagrid, children, this is Healer Chang from St. Mungos."
Hagrid bowed his head politely in silent greeting – disgruntled still as he was about his pillowcase (which he wasn't sure he wanted back after all).
"Healer Chang did her internship with me here at Hogwarts ten years back. And I believe her daughter was in your brother, Ronald's year, Ms. Weasley."
Ginny nodded and smiled in greeting. "Pleased to meet you, Healer Chang. I'm the Seeker for Gryffindor. Cho was a worthy opponent." Too worthy, if you ask me, groused Ginny to herself, remembering how Ravenclaw had trounced Gryffindor and won the Quidditch cup at the end of the year.
At the mention of her daughter, Healer Chang's entire demeanor changed. "She's trying ou' for Puddlemere United nex' season. It's the oldest club 'n the League, y'know," she beamed with pride.
Harry was now reaching into his pajama bottoms and tugging at the edge of his new nappy, trying to pull it off. Ginny, glad to have a reason not to have to compliment Cho Chang any further, successfully distracted him from this endeavor by grabbing another sugar cube. "Oh, no, it's the last one! We'll need something else to distract him. Madam Pomfrey, do you have any sweets?"
"I'm a Nurse not a confectioner, Ms. Weasley!" she snapped.
"Allow me, Madam Pomfrey. I think I have sommat t'help. Ehm, my wand, if y'please," she said dryly and Madam Pomfrey handed it back. "Accio Bag," she called. A bright orange handbag with a rather large daisy growing out of the front pocket whooshed to Healer Chang from the office. "I always carry one 'r two items wi' me for emergencies. Now le' see…" and she rummaged through the contents spilling some dirt from the front pocket onto the pristine ward's floor. (Madam Pomfrey, saying nothing, only raised her eyes to the ceiling and huffed at the unhygienic affront. Rose refused to notice.) At last the woman pulled out a comic book. "Ah this is it. 'Wizard Glick an' the Muggle Broom'. It's an old fav'rit. M'bairnes all loved the page where he tries to fly – 'specially Cho," she said and Ginny forced a smile.
"Rose, I asked you out here to assist me with this patient, not to reminisce," Poppy made a show of stepping around the tiny splatter of dirt and approached Harry's cot.
"Sorry, Ma'am," said Rose, feeling a bit like an intern again for a moment. "Here y'go, lad," she said, handing the book to Harry. He ignored this, having returned to trying to extricate himself from the snug-fitting nappy. Ginny took the book. "Let's just help this young man have a lie down, and y'can read t'him while we determine –" she paused, looking up at Poppy questioningly, "– well, wha'ever i' is we're needing t'determine."
"Shall we chat in my office first, Healer Chang? I can outline the diagnoses I am seeking from you."
Rose nodded in reply- a truce understood – and with a "Mobilipuer" she waved her wand and levitated Harry.
"Uppys!" Harry gasped in wonder and below him, the white linen bedcovers turned themselves down. At once he was lowered and seated in the center of the cot, whereupon the covers rose up over him to his chin and firmly pressed him back tucking him in quite securely. "Uh," objected Harry in dismay. "Uppys, moh," and he looked about in earnest though he could only raise his head. Before he had a chance to work up a fuss, Ginny held the comic up so he could see it. He glanced at the cover and did a double-take. He saw something…moving. Curious, he leaned his head the last bit forward that the sheets allowed and Ginny tilted the book down to give him a better view. "Uh!" he gasped again recoiling into the pillow in surprise. But his eyes were transfixed on the moving images. Then he looked up at Ginny in wonder.
"It's okay, Harry. It's a comic. You'll like it," Ginny encouraged. "I used to love these. Look, Wizard Glick is waving to you."
Harry furrowed his brow and worried his lower lip for several moments in trepidation. Then he appeared to gather his courage and looked back at the strange object. There was a tiny man with a flowing blond beard and half-moon spectacles waving at him and smiling. He looked familiar to Harry, who now struggled to shift his shoulders and get loose. Ginny furtively looked toward the two older witches. Seeing they were in the office, she pulled one side of the bedcovers loose and Harry's hand shot out. Harry was so focused on the waving Wizard that it appeared he hadn't noticed: his hand remained poised in midair. And then…he waved back timidly – just barely really – with the tips of his fingers and sighed softly, "Hi, Umbah."
The two women returned and Healer Chang made to lift her wand above Harry's head just as Madam Pomfrey had done earlier. She said sympathetically, "Nasty cut on 'is head there. How'd tha' happen?" and proceeded with her diagnostics.
"Rose," Poppy said, after a few moments, preparing herself for the tumult that was sure to accompany her next words, "This is Harry Potter."
Healer Chang nearly dropped her wand. "Oh my. Oh no. Oh m'dearie, no. Why, this is dreadful!" she exclaimed, backing away from the cot and looking at her wand as if it had done a most horrible spell of its own accord.
"What? What did you find?" asked Ginny in alarm.
"Nee-Nee," called Harry to Ginny when he heard her agitated voice. She forced a reassuring smile down at him and gestured for him to continue looking at the comic.
Healer Chang could only babble for a moment before coherent words started to form. "…Bu-bu-but he's The Chosen One. How will he ayver be able to d'feat He-Who-Shall-No'-Be-Named in his condition?" Now it was she who spoke in abject alarm.
"Calm yourself, Rose!" snapped Madam Pomfrey. "You are a Professional! Now please give me your diagnosis!"
"S-sorry, Ma'am," said Rose, shaking. "Har– this lad has had a near-fatal head injury. His brain has irreversible magical damage." She faltered slightly but raised her wand again to continue Sensing. "But, tha's odd. Has he, er, The Chosen One, er–"
"'Mr. Potter' will do, Rose. Get a grip, woman," grumbled Poppy impatiently.
"Yes, well, Mr. Potter then. Has he exhibited any difficulties wi' movement?"
"He had," Ginny began, thinking of when they first arrived at Hagrid's, and then she realized something. "But when he Apparated back after…he seemed better." Was it due to the removal of the Horcrux? The Healer seemed to be on to something, and Ginny felt – despite her agreement to wait – that she should give the woman any information that might assist her in helping improve Harry's condition. "The Horcrux, Hagrid. Give it over. Ron gave it to you, right?"
"D-did you s-say 'Horcrux' Ms. Weasley?" stammered Madam Pomfrey uncharacteristically as Hagrid started shuffling through his many pockets to retrieve it.
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Chapter 8: Unspeakable