About an hour later, the two teenagers sat on the floor of the secret room, surrounded by the mess they had made looking for clues. Eleanor held a couple of maps in her hands comparing them up. Newt was intently studying the section of the Maze where the Cliff stood, checking for anything the Runners might had missed before.
She had managed to get a clean shirt and a change of bandages from Jeff, who had protested she should have been resting, and met Newt there. They had decided to arrive separately as to not arrise suspicion from Gally and the other Gladers. Newt had told Eleanor that Chuck had been set on visiting Thomas and he had assured her the kid would look for them if he had any trouble.
Eleanor's first impression of the Map-room had been slight disappointment. She had expected something a little bit cooler than a small dark room with a few cupboards and no windows that smelled of sweat and dirty socks.
Thankfully, Newt had known where everything was stored and they hadn't wasted any time searching through the piles of old running shoes that seemed to be inside the cupboards. He had gone straight to a couple of drawers that contained sketched papers.
"They're divided by sections." He had said.
Each one had picked a section and gotten to work.
But the maps hadn't yet proven to be helpful. Eleanor had never been out in the Maze so she didn't understand the patterns or the notes the Runners had scribbled along the lines.
She squinted her eyes, trying to discern one of the anotations, '...killzone experiment...'
What were the other words?
It felt pointless and frustrating, she knew she was wasting her time. If she hadn't understood anything yet, how could she manage to find any clue or detail the Runners might have missed, when they had been studying them for three years?
She picked up another blueprint and wacked her brain. Trying to make sense of all the lines. She had supposedly been looking at the same section all that time but it didn't make sense. Some of the sketches matched but others didn't.
So much for the Runners being the smartest of the lot. Who had drawn that?
A scribble on the corner gave her the answer.
Ben.
She froze, then swallowed, forcing the image of his crazed face away. After the previous days, she hadn't even thought about the former Runner and it wasn't a good time to start.
She forced herself to focus.
Ben was smart, had been smart, he wouldn't have made so many mistakes.
"Wait."
It clicked.
Newt looked up.
"The Maze changes, right?"
"How do you know that?" He questioned.
She shook her head, "Alby mentioned it, on my tour, I think- Or Minho might have said something... I don't know. Does it?"
He was staring at her.
"Yes, yes it does. One section changes each night. Maybe I should have mentioned it but it never opened anything new, if it showed a way out we would have seen it."
Eleanor nodded. She hadn't thought it'd be that easy.
"But is there like a pattern or something, or does it change at random?"
His brow furrowed and he explained slowly. "At first we thought it was at random but then we realised it had an order. There's eight sections. Every day one section is different. I don't know the order though."
"Okay," She breathed, thinking to herself. "Okay. I'll ask Minho."
Could she be onto something? If the sections changed but they didn't change in a normal numerical order that had to mean something.
She looked up at Newt again to find him looking at her with a sympathetic expression and she realised, he didn't want to burst her bubble.
"You guys already thought of that, didn't you?"
He gave her a sorry look. "I don't think it means anything. The Maze is divided by sections, the sections are numbered. That's all."
She nodded, maybe he was right.
"I guess..." She was still unsure, "But for some reason, I don't think the Creators or whoever put us here do anything at random, so maybe it means something."
She could tell she hadn't convinced him.
"Maybe."
He went back to his papers after giving her a small encouraging smile.
She massaged the pressure on her temple, trying to ease the tension.
She got up to stretch her legs. Newt's attention didn't leave his task at hand. Her pain had faded a little bit since that morning or she had gotten used to it by then, either way it was a good sign. She knew that meant she didn't have an infection.
She moved around the room, checking drawers she hadn't checked yet. A bunch of boundled up socks made her close one immediately. She didn't wish to explore that any further.
The following drawer, however, caught her attention. Several watches of different colours filled the bottom, old and new, some were classic and some digital. She picked a classic brown one in awe.
She knew the Runners wore watches so they could keep track of the time while working and avoid getting trapped at night. She had been woken up many mornings by Minho's alarm herself. She knew Alby had worn one, that was understandable since he had to control everthing. And Newt?
She checked. Yes, Newt wore one too. But no one else was allowed one.
She looked at the object again, so simple, yet so useful. It felt like a luxury.
"Newt?"
"Huh?" He said, without looking up from the papers he towered over with a furrowed brow.
"Where did these come from?"
He looked up in confusion and saw the girl holding the watch in her hand as if it was a precious object.
"Oh, they came in the Box." He replied absentmindedly, going back to his previous task. "Yeah, the digital ones we asked for so we could set alarms."
"Could I have one?" She tried. "I don't need a digital one, any of them would do."
She felt stupid for getting excited over something like that with everything that was going on. Besides, she already knew he wouldn't break the rules for her... Maybe, she'd ask Minho for one later.
"Sure." He shrugged, "Why not? Everything's going to klunk anyway."
She breathed out a laugh, that boy continiously surprised her.
"Great. If I'm going to die, now at least I'll know what time it is."
She buckled her new possesion on. Even on the first hole it was a little loose on her wrist but she smiled. It was the coolest thing she owned.
When she looked up, he was staring at her. Her smile faded.
"You're not going to die." He stated.
Eleanor raised her eyebrows at him. "I almost died last night. If they come tonight I dont think a stand a chance."
She resumed her previous seat on the floor and couldn't contain the pained grunt she emited, proving her point.
"You won't die tonight." He stared at her intensely, with a serious expression on his face. "I promise."
But his gaze lowered and they both knew that was a promise he couldn't keep.
She shook her head, they didn't want to go there. She couldn't let anymore space for fear and sadness in her mind.
"I'm not scared of dying." She confessed. The blonde looked up at her again, the maps forgotten. "I just- I can't watch anymore of my friends die. So if I'm going down, it won't be without a fight."
She was surprised with how certain she sounded. She didn't feel that confident.
However, hadn't she jumped in front of that Griever to safe Chuck? She hadn't even thought about it, she'd just done it. Would she be able to do the same again? Knowing the pain, the fear, it took to face one of those monsters? To protect someone by sacrificing herself? She wasn't sure.
She'd rather she died than any of her friends, but would she be brave enough? And, even if she was, she couldn't protect them forever. If she died, it didn't mean they'd get to live.
Newt seemed deep in thought too, but he nodded. "We have to fight. But if we don't find a way out it won't matter."
"Yes, it will." She stated. "At least we'd die fighting. But you're right, we need to find a way out."
He groaned, rubbing his face. "This is pointless. How can we find something in a few hours when we have been wacking our brains for years?"
Eleanor observed him. He looked so much like a child then. She could see he was exhausted. He seemed defeated and that scared Eleanor more than she'd care to admit.
"Well, now you have me." She gave him her best winning smile but that barely got a chuckle out of him.
"Maybe..." She tried again, taking the piece of paper from his hand. "We need a change of perspective."
She laid down on the dirty ground filled with papers and lifted her arm up to observe the map against the light.
Newt gave an amused sigh and immitated her, laying down next to her form.
They observed the map in silence for a few minutes. She didn't know what to say to make him feel better, she doubted there was anything she could say at all. She brought her arm down but they didn't move.
The weight of her experience and her injuries fell on her. She felt very tired. She was contemplating just closing her eyes, knowing she wouldn't be able to sleep when the night came. Also, they had to talk to Minho and she had promised Teresa she would go to see her. Not to mention, they had to prepare for whatever the night awaited them.
"Newt?" Her whisper broke the silence, "Do you think we should sleep a little before-"
He sniffed and she turned to him. He turned away.
"Hey, what-" He was facing away from her but she could see tear tracks on his profile. "Are you okay?"
Eleanor had never seen the blonde show such vulnerability. Sometimes she forgot he was a kid, like her. He always seemed so composed, so mature. But of course he suffered, of course he could crack too.
"You don't have to answer that." She quickly spoke, ashamed of herself. "Of course you're not okay. I'm an idiot."
You're so smooth, Eleanor.
He gave a breathy chuckle and wiped away his tears.
"I'm fine." He sounded surprisingly convincing, "It's nothing."
"Hey, you're not fooling me. I'm the queen of drama, remember?"
She fell silent. He still wouldn't look at her.
"You know..." She started, "You don't have to talk to me. In fact, I can leave right now if you want me too."
She sat up, trying to look at his expression. Ready to leave him his space if he asked for it.
When he didn't reply she spoke again.
"Look, if you want to cry, cry. If you want to scream, scream. Let it out. You don't have to be tough all the time."
He finally looked back at her. "I'm afraid if I start, I'll never stop."
The pain in his eyes was overwhelming and she fell a knot forming in her stomach at the sight of him clearly suffering.
"Talking also helps."
She tried to give him a short smile and laid back down.
She wouldn't pressure him. It was his right to deal with his emotions however he wanted to. And, if he was going to talk to someone, she was sure it wasn't her.
"Did you know-" He finally spoke, "-I used to be a Runner?"
Eleanor gazed at him and shook her head.
"Before I shucked my leg, yeah... I- The Maze fucks you up. It messes with your head. I couldn't handle it." He paused and took a deep breath, reorganizing his thoughts.
She waited, patiently, taking it in. She didn't want him to regret opening up to her. She wanted him to trust her. She wanted to help the suffering boy in front of her.
"At the beginning, everything wasn't as organized, so being in the Glade wasn't much better than being out in the Maze. And I was so sure, so convinced, that I would find a way out. But then... I didn't. When we had run every corner of the Maze and found nothing, it was hard to keep doing it- to keep going when you knew you wouldn't find an escape."
He was composed, but Eleanor found herself sharing his pain. A few tears had escaped the corners of her eyes into her hair.
Newt took a few more second then, staring straight ahead.
"Then I got hurt-" He cleared his throat.
Her eyes followed a tear that made its way through his cheek. She didn't dare ask anything afraid he would stop talking if she did.
"-Nick died and Alby needed me. Things got better after that, we focused on mantaining an order, living day by day. As long as we had food to eat, a place to sleep and the walls kept us safe we'd be okay. But we have known there was no way out for a long time and I guess we couldn't live like that forever. We've run out of time. Ther doors won't close and now Alby is gone, and I have to go back into that bloody Maze."
His face turned towards her after that, but his eyes weren't sad, as she had expected. He looked irritated, like he didn't find a joke funny.
She took a few seconds to gather her thoughts. He was waiting for her to say something.
"Newt, how did you..." She didn't feel brave enough to ask the question but she felt like she had to. She could barely get the question out. "How did you hurt your leg?"
Eleanor knew any of the oringinal Gladers would know what had happened, but it would be a betrayal of Newt's trust to find out that way. He would tell her if he wanted to, and if he didn't, that'd be okay too.
He shook his head and tuned away from her once more, hiding his face.
"I lost hope." He simply stated.
Eleanor's breath caught in her throat.
She knew he wouldn't say anything else about it. She didn't know what to say. She knew she couldn't make him feel better and that hurt more than her physical wounds. She felt overwhhelmed by the thought of how desperate he might have felt back then, how helpless, hopeless.
He had been right when he'd told her hope was the most important thing they had. They should never lose it, and he was losing it... again.
She composed herself. He didn't need someone to feel sorry for him.
"Okay, maybe you never found a way out. But things have changed, right? The sky is gone, the doors won't close... So maybe something has changed in the Maze too."
She tried to sound optimistic, wiping the back of her palms against her face to remove the remaining tears. She had to be strong.
"It's like Thomas said, they're forcing us out. So maybe they have opened a door or something that wasn't there before. And yes, maybe we'l have to go into the Maze. But we'll go together."
As cliché as it was, her hand looked for his and grabbed it softly, giving him room to reject her contact.
He didn't.
They both knew they had to believe they stood a chance or else they'd never get out. She squeezed his hand, trying to say I'm here, I'm with you.
Eleanor turnd her body towards the boy.
"You're right." He simply said.
She smiled softly and raised her fingers to brush a stubborn teardrop away from his cheek.
"Sorry about all this." He turned his body too.
"Don't be." She replied, "Thank you for telling me."
She was in a daze of pain and exhaustion and the overwhelming feeling that the boy that always drove her crazy had trusted her with his feelings. So, when he leaned in to kiss her, she kissed him back.
The caress of his lips was gentle and slow.
It was nothing like the other kiss had been. She wasn't crazy with grief and need. She was completely concious and aware of what was happening and she didn't want to stop it. It was soft and sweet, and she felt calm and warm like she hadn't for a long time.
She was just a girl, kissing a boy and nothing else mattered.
Their hands were still intertwined. She leaned into him more, wanting more contact, more soft touch, more sweet oblivion.
Then, he was pulling away, his hand away from hers.
"Sorry." He sat up quickly, breathing hard. "I don't want to make things more difficult."
Eleanor sat up too and without thinking she found herself turning his face towards her own.
"Do you want to kiss me?" She whispered.
Newt gulped and nodded. And even if she knew it was wrong, that she shouldn't do it. She wanted to.
She kissed him again.
His hands went up to grab her face as he deepened the kiss.
A tingle went up Eleanor's spine and she whimpered softly as his tongue brushed her bottom lip, wanting more.
Minho arrived at the Map-room later than expected. By then, they had already given up on the maps and were waiting outside.
The fresh air had felt wonderful after being inside that musty old room for so long.
The atmosphere after their kiss hadn't been as awkward as Eleanor had expected it to be. Unlike the last and first time it had happened, when Newt had tracked her down to question her on the meaning of her actions, he seemed to act like it hadn't even happened.
Eleanor thought that was better than the alternative so she played along.
If she was being honest, she didn't even know how she felt about it. That other time, she had blamed it on her grief and desperation. But this time, she wasn't naive enough to ignore she had wanted it, seeked it, even.
Did that mean she liked him? Or were her hormones and her nerves to blame?
Whatever the case, it wasn't the time to focus on those feelings or lack-there-of. There were more important things that claimed her attention. If they happened to survive that hell, she would face her emotions.
Once she had made that decision, it became easier not thinking about it.
What she hadn't expected was the guilt she experienced when Minho came into view. She unconciously took a step away from the blonde as she tried not to blush.
"Min." She exclaimed.
"Hey." He embraced her as soon as she got to them. "How are you doing?"
She could tell he was tired but his voice was soft and full of worry.
"I'm okay." She breathed in his scent, she always missed him during the day. But lately it was becoming specially harder to be away from him.
"Don't scare me like that again." He spoke, still not letting go.
"I'll try." They broke apart and she remembered.
"And you-" She exclaimed, "Why the hell did you think it was a good idea to go after a Griever?"
She hit his chest lightly to emphasize her outrage.
He chuckled, "I deserved that."
A throat was cleared. "Guys, sorry to cut this but we have to talk."
Newt had given them space but the urgency of the matter broke their bubble.
"Of course, man." Said the runner.
"First of all," Newt went back to his leader persona. "Did you find anything?"
The other boy shook his head, "No big discovery, but there were more Grievers around than usual. They seem to be guarding section six."
"Is that were the Cliff is?" The girl intervined.
It was Newt who nodded, "Well, that certainly doesn't discredit Thomas' theory."
"We should go to the Slammer." Eleanor suggested.
Newt nodded and they wasted no time.
Minho trailed after them. "Wait, why are we going to the Slammer?"
They ignored him.
"What time did the Griever come last night?" The girl asked, checking her new favourite possession.
Newt answered. "About midnight."
"You got a watch?" The Runner questioned, after falling to step next to her.
She answered him quickly, giving him a wink. "I'm an honorary Glader now."
Then, she turned back to the blonde, "Okay, so we have about four hours to come up with something."
Newt gave another nod, "Let's hope Tommy wakes the hell up."
Eleanor chuckled, "We should eat something too."
"Finally, something that makes sense." Minho spoke, "I'm starving."
Once again, they ignored him.
Coming to a halt, Eleanor adressed Newt. "Alright, how about I go get some pillows for the Greenies, in case they have to stay the night locked up, and you guys go get food for everyone, see what damage Gally has done, and we meet there?"
"Gally? What?"
The Keeper of the Runners was ignored once more.
Newt thought it over and nodded. "Sounds good."
"What's going on El?" Minho was starting to get very annoyed, she could tell. "Since when are you in charge?"
She gave him a short simle.
Newt spoke again, ignoring the runner once more.
"Be careful with the Builders, stay out of their way." He warned her.
Minho was glaring daggers at them.
"You too." She didn't have to argue against his advice, "Oh, and fill him in, won't you?"
She nodded her head toward her best friend and went on her way, only feeling a little bit sorry for leaving the blonde with an angry Minho.
"Wicked is good."
It was like the third time that had come out of the Greenie's mouth.
"He's been like that for a while, mumbling." Said Teresa.
They sat opposite eachother separated by the door. One of the pillows she had brought had been placed under the unconcious boy's head, who lied spread out on the ground of the small room. The other was being used by Teresa as a seat.
Eleanor had tried to fill in the Newbie as much as she could.
"I think that's a good sign. Normally, the Changing takes days but he seems to be going through it faster than anyone I've seen before."
Chuck was there too but Teresa had said he'd been there for a while. Probably the reason why he was fast asleep against one of the outside doors. His position looked completely uncomfortable but Eleanor didn't even think of waking him up. He needed the rest, they all did.
Teresa gave a long sigh. "I just want to get out of here."
Eleanor gave her a sympathetic smile, "We'll get you out, we just need to come up with a plan."
"How about this? You get me out and I punch that Gally guy in the throat. How's that sound?"
Eleanor laughed. "Pretty solid, but there are other things we have to think about."
"We're escaping." It was a statement, not a question.
Eleanor nodded, taken aback once more by how easily the new girl could comprehend every situation.
"Bad news." Came Minho's voice from behind.
The girls turned to find the two Keepers walking towards them with a handful of sandwiches for all of them.
"What is it?" Eleanor questioned.
"The Builders have gone off the rails."
Her eyebrows shot up. "More?"
"They want to offer these two-" Minho explained, signalling the inside of the Slammer with the sandwiches he held, "-as a sacrifice for the Grievers tonight."
Newt confirmed it with a nod as her gaze questioned his.
"What the fuck?" Exclaimed Teresa.
"You're kidding, right?" Eleanor added.
That cannot be true.
"We're not." Newt spoke solemnly and handed Teresa a sandwich. She grabbed it. "I don't know whose idea it is."
"I can think of a few people." She muttered angrily. She couldn't believe it. "And everyone else is okay with it?"
"They're scared." Newt tried explaining. "The Builders have convinced them that if the give them victims, the Grievers won't attack them."
"That's bullshit." She accepted the sandwich from Minho but was too angry to do anything other than hold it. "They think the Grievers are gonna stop after taking two people, that they're not going to keep coming back for more?"
Minho shrugged, "They want to save themselves. It's their way of self-preservation."
"No. Killing someone to save yourself is not self-preservation." She glared at him. "It's selfish. It's murder.
"Hey." Her friend took a seat next to her and bit into his food, not fazed by her anger. "I'm on your side."
Eleanor tried to take a calming breath. Teresa was unusually quiet.
"Hey buddy." Newt shook the sleeping kid awake and took a seat next to him. "Here, eat something."
Eleanor stared at the group without seeing, her thoughts racing. Chuck rubbed the sleep from his eyes and took a bite.
"Eleanor."
Her attention turned to the blonde.
"Eat." He ordered.
She looked at her sandwich, having forgotten it was there. She didn't feel hungry anymore but she knew she needed to eat so she took a bite.
Teresa broke the silence. "So, what are we going to do? Because I'm not going to be a freaking sacrifice."
"You won't" Eleanor assured her, hoping she could keep that promise.
"Fight?" Minho suggested.
"Fight the Builders?" Eleanor said incredulously.
It was a horrible idea. They would end up injuring or killing eachother and handing themselves to the Grievers on a silver platter.
"I guess not." He back-tracked.
"Should we just go? Make a run for the Maze and hope the way out is where you think it is?" Teresa suggested, shrugging.
Newt immediately shook his head. "I'm not abandoning them to die."
He sounded defiant. Teresa didn't reply but she didn't seem at all fazed. Eleanor thought she understood her reaction. After all, the girl didn't know these people and they had incarcerated her and were trying to kill her. Of course her priority was saving herself.
"You're right." Eleanor said to Newt. "They should, at least, get to decide if they want to stay or come with us."
Minho nodded.
"Could we talk to Gally? Try to convince him?" Chuck's innocent imput made them fall silent.
Eleanor thought of Gally. It seemed imposible to get him to change his mind on anything. However, stubborn as he was, he had always followed the rules.
"Maybe you could try talking to him." Eleanor adressed the former Second-in-command. "He might listen to you."
The boy shook his head.
"I tried. If Alby was still here he could convince him but he won't listen to me." He thought for a second, "Maybe..."
Suddenly, he was staring at her.
"What...?"
Minho stared at her too, raising his eyebrows.
"Me?" She said in disbelief. "If you haven't noticed, we're not really friends anymore. He doesn't care what I have to say. He hates me."
Newt shook his head. Eleanor ignored him, she already knew his insane theory about Gally's former feelings for her.
"He doesn't."
The girl turned to Minho in surprise.
"He cares about you." The Runner added.
"He doesn't!" She exclaimed.
Hadn't they been paying attention all that time?
"I've seen it-" He said softly, wary of her reaction. "-the way he looks at you."
"With loathing?!" She couldn't believe it. Since when did Minho think that?
"He still cares, Eleanor." Newt came to his friend's rescue.
Eleanor swallowed her retort.
She couldn't afford to reopen old wounds by drawing out the conversation, but a tiny part of her knew it was possible, that he might still care. He had observeed her in the Dead-heads, he had saved her from Will, and there were those times when his hard exterior had crumbled and she had thought she'd seen another side of him.
Could he had been...?
To even entretain the idea made her insides twist and her heart clench. She couldn't let herself believe he cared about her even a little bit.
But she was being selfish, she knew that. Her feelings weren't more important than people's lives.
What did she have to lose? Being offered as a third sacrifice? She didn't think Gally cared but she also doubted he would kill her.
So then, what? A bruised ego? She could deal with that. After all, she had already gotten over him once. The second time should be simple, right?
She sighed, completely unconvinced but knowing she had to try.
"So, you think he'll talk to me?"
Minho grimaced, she could tell he wasn't happy about it either, "It's worth a try."
"Alone?" She couldn't help asking. She knew the answer.
Newt gave her an apologetic smile. She swallowed.
"Jesus, this is like a soap-opera." Teresa spoke after having observed the group through that conversation.
Minho glared at the Greenie but Eleanor giggled, trying to push back the nerves that had taken over her body.