Chapter 39

Brandon placed his freshly folded shirts into his dresser, pausing when his eyes landed on a small pink fabric rolled up in the corner of the draw. He reached for it hesitantly and slowly unrolled it. It was the I'm Cute, Mom's Hot, Dad's Lucky onesie he bought after they found out the baby was a girl. Tears stung his eyes as he lowered himself to the floor. He brought the clothing to his chest. He swore he felt his heart crack. It should be Melody he was holding to his chest. It should be Melody wearing the onesie. He missed her. He missed her unbearably. It was strange to love and miss someone so much when he hadn't even met her. He saw her, held her, talked to her, but he wasn't sure he considered it meeting when she hadn't even taken a single breath. But he missed her. He missed her more than he thought was possible. The lump in his throat swelled. He squeezed his eyes shut as hot tears oozed from them.

"Hey, do you…" Callie began as she pushed Brandon's door open. She paused abruptly when she found him on the floor, clutching something pink to his chest with tears staining his cheeks. His eyes met hers and she felt her heart twinge at the pain she found swimming in them. She stepped inside quietly and closed the door behind her. "You okay?"

Brandon hesitated before holding out the onesie. Realization flickered across Callie's eyes. "I'm sorry. I just found this and…"

"Don't apologize." She said softly as she crossed the room. She kneeled down on the floor beside him and wrapped her arms around him. "I don't want you to feel like you can't fall apart in front of me. You're grieving too."

He nodded against Callie's chest as a sob ripped through his throat. He has been grieving, but he had been trying to hold it together for Callie's sake because however hard this was for him, it was twice as hard for her. But it was hard, so hard. There wasn't a day that went by where he didn't miss Melody. And having Frankie in the house, watching her reach milestones, made it that much more painful. He loved watching Callie interact with Frankie. She was so good with her, so loving, so maternal. But he also felt his chest ache every time at the painful reminder that he would never see her do those things with Melody. "I miss her so much."

Callie rested her chin against the top of Brandon's head as he cried into her. She closed her eyes as tears simmered against her own lids. She knew his pain, she felt it too. "I know. I miss her too."

His body shook against her as the tears continued to burst like water in a dam. Her fingers stroked his hair soothingly as she pressed gentle kisses to the top of his head. He held onto her as though she was his lifeline. At this point, they practically were each other's lifeline. After all they had been through, neither of them was sure they'd be able to continue on without the other. She rocked him silently, her own lashes heavy with tears. Neither of them had to say anything to know what the other was feeling.

After Brandon's sobs eventually quieted, he pulled out of Callie's arms to face her. He noticed her own cheeks were decorated with tears. He paused for a moment as he searched for his words. "I…I feel like I got you into this whole mess."

Callie furrowed her eyebrows. "What are you talking about?"

"Vico. I got involved with him. It was my mistake and he hurt you to get back at me. All of this, all of your pain, is because of Vico and that's because he was getting revenge on me." Brandon exposed the guilt that had been eating him alive since the winter ball.

"Brandon." Callie breathed with a frown. She reached into his lap to take his hand in hers. "We've been over this. None of that is true. What happened wasn't your fault. I…I would do anything to change what happened that night at the winter ball. I think that all the time and then I feel awful because if it didn't then I never would have been pregnant with Melody. It may sound crazy, but I wouldn't want to take back the time that I did have with her."

"That's not crazy." Brandon whispered as his thumb rubbed soft circles on Callie's hand, intertwined with his. "But Vico is the reason why that time was cut short."

"He wasn't getting revenge on you that time. He was getting revenge on me for opening my mouth about what he did." Callie said, shuddering slightly as she recalled that very day in that house.

Brandon swallowed back his anger. Callie hadn't technically opened her mouth, but rather they had almost beat her to death. Brandon wondered if she hadn't been hurt so badly if she would have kept quiet about what happened. He shook the thought from his mind and met her eyes again. "Still that wouldn't have happened if I didn't get involved with him."

"Brandon, you have to let this guilt go." Callie said softly. It was tearing at her heart that he was carrying this guilt. "You made a mistake. You're allowed. That didn't give Vico the right to do what he did. And it wasn't just him. It was Liam too, who hurt me before I knew you. Honestly, if you didn't get involved with Vico, I have no doubt that Liam would have hurt me on his own. He was clearly planning revenge before he met Vico. And none of that had anything to do with you."

"I just wish I never sold those stupid IDs." More tears trickled down his cheeks slowly like a leaky faucet.

Callie reached up to cup his face, gently brushing away the salty tears. "It was a mistake that you were entitled to. We all make mistakes that we all wish we could take back. But none of this was your fault. Yes, Vico knew that hurting me would hurt you, but what if the roles were reversed? What if someone hurt you or Jude to get back at me? Would you blame me?"

"No." Brandon choked out. He inhaled deeply, meeting her eyes so full of sincerity and love. It made his heart skip a beat. "I love you."

"I love you too." She whispered, leaning forwards to press her lips against his. She reached out to take the onesie, still clutched in Brandon's hand. A sad smile found her lips. "I remember when you gave me that. We just found out she was a girl."

"Seeing you with Frankie kills me." Brandon admitted, earning Callie's attention. "You're so good with her and I love watching you with her, but then it hurts so much because that should be you with Melody."

Callie studied Brandon's features, etched with sorrow, for a moment before nodding. "I feel the same way when I watch you with Frankie. I had no doubt that you were going to be an amazing father, but watching you prove it makes it hurt so much more. But I look forward to watching you with our future kids."

A small smile found his lips at Callie's last statement. "We're going to have lots of babies."

"We are?" Callie laughed with a raised eyebrow.

"Yup." Brandon nodded with a grin. "A few biological and a few adopted."

A matching smile stretched Callie's lips. Warmth spread throughout her stomach. Whenever she felt like giving up on life, her future with Brandon got her through. He was the light at the end of a seemingly never-ending, pitch-black tunnel. "That sounds amazing."

Brandon scooted forward, snaking his hand around the back of her neck. His eyes fluttered shut as he pressed his lips against hers, inhaling her sweet scent. His fingers danced in her curls as their lips moved in perfect synchrony. "We'll start with adopting a dog first."

Callie giggled, and it sounded like music to Brandon's ears. "I like this plan. What else?"

"Hmm…well we'll both go to college. Nearby because I can't be away from you. And once we graduate we'll get married. I'm thinking of Italy for our honeymoon. Then we'll get our dog. Maybe a cat too. And then we'll have a baby. I will continue to fall so insanely in love with you every single day."

Callie's eyes lingered on Brandon before she lunged forward, planting her smile on his lips. Her hands wrapped around the back of his neck as his hands found her back, pulling her closer. Brandon lowered his back to the ground, keeping his lips glued to Callie's. Their bodies melted into one another; her chest pressed against his, their legs tangled with one another's. Brandon flipped them over so Callie was beneath him, her silky hair tickling his face as he did so. Her hands slipped beneath his shirt. Sparks ignited up Brandon's spine as her fingertips grazed his back. A low moan escaped Callie as Brandon's tongue glided along her lower lip. A moan that made Brandon's entire body feel warm and tingly.

"Tell me when you want to stop." He whispered against her lips as he always did after their kisses became heated and passionate.

"Not yet." Callie breathed before pulling his face back onto hers and intermingling their breaths. She loved that he always reminded her she was in control. Not once did he ever pressure her to go further than she felt comfortable with. The taste of his soft lips moving perfectly with hers made all her problems melt away.

Brandon's lips traced the line of her jawbone before peppering soft kisses down her neck. "You're so beautiful."

Callie's heart fluttered as it raced in her chest. The temptation to take this further was growing with each second, with each kiss, with each touch. The raw sensations of Brandon's hands and lips on her body made the world cease to exist and she wanted to get lost in it. But she knew her trauma would haunt her if she did take this further. And so after a few moments, she reluctantly sat up and Brandon followed her lead, sitting up across from her. He reached out to tuck a strand ringlet behind her ear.

"Are we making a habit of making out on the floor?" Callie laughed, reminiscing about their lip-locking session at Daphne's apartment while she was at Girl's United.

Brandon smirked as his own mind went back to that day when he serenaded her. It felt like a lifetime ago and as difficult as things seemed at that time, they were so much simpler than they were now. "Well, that's certainly not a habit I want to break."

"I'm sorry it hasn't gone further." Callie whispered, taking interest in a loose thread on the carpet.

Brandon reached for her hand, halting her distraction. "Callie, don't you dare apologize for that."

"I'm working on it." She met his eyes hesitantly.

"You know there's no rush. I would never, ever pressure you into anything you're not comfortable with." He reminded her as he laced their fingers together.

"I know." She nodded.

"And you let me know if there's anything you need me to do."

"You're already doing everything and more." Callie offered him a small smile. "But I don't want you to feel like you can't talk to me when you're hurting. About Melody, about anything. You're not going to upset me. Obviously, I don't want to see you upset, but you talking about her makes me feel less alone."

Brandon nodded. "Okay."

"You're always on me about keeping things bottled in and you're doing the same." Callie chastised softly.

"Okay so let's both promise to talk out our feelings." Brandon released Callie's hand and held his pinky finger in the air with a grin. She returned the smile and locked her pinky with his. "So did you come in here for something or you just couldn't stand to be away from me?"

Callie's let out a small laugh. "Well, it was getting hard being away from you. But actually, I came in here to talk about college."

"College?" Brandon cocked an eyebrow at his girlfriend.

"Yes. Now that the trial is finally over with and I'm starting to move on with my life, I'm starting to look into possible colleges. I was wondering if I should be applying to schools in New York?"

Brandon grimaced slightly. "I'm not going to get into Juilliard."

"You don't know that. You're amazing at piano, Brandon."

"I was amazing." Brandon frowned.

"Stop." Callie scolded. "You are still amazing. At playing and composing. You won a prestigious competition at a competitive music school and that was only weeks after you started playing classical again."

"I'm applying if that makes you feel better. I'm just not expecting to be going."

Callie pursed her lips as she held her gaze on him for a moment. "Well, then I'll be looking into colleges in New York because I believe in you."

A smirk suddenly found Brandon's lips. "Look at you talking about college like a normal teenager."

Callie laughed. "I know. Weird, right? Except I still have no idea what I want to do with my life."

"When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?" Brandon asked.

Callie winced slightly. "A singing chef."

Brandon couldn't help the chuckle that left his mouth. "Seriously? A singing chef? What is that?"

Callie nudged him playfully. "Don't make fun. When I was little I liked to help my mom cook and I liked to sing."

"That's actually adorable." Brandon grinned widely. "But I'm guessing you don't want to be a chef or a singer anymore since you don't really cook or sing. Although you have a beautiful voice, you just don't use it."

Callie's smile dissipated from her face as she shook her head. "Those dreams were long forgotten when I went into foster care. My dreams then were Jude being safe and surviving the system."

Brandon felt his heart twinge at the endless suffering the amazing girl before him suffered from. "Jude is safe, you're safe, and you both survived the system. So now we're going to find new dreams. You don't need to have it all figured out when you go to college either. Most people end up changing their majors more than once during their college career."

Callie let out a long sigh. "You're right. I don't have to have it all figured out just yet."

"Nobody expects you to either." Brandon reached into her lap to take her hand again, sandwiching it between both of his. "You've had so, so much to deal with. More than anyone should ever have to deal with in an entire lifetime. You haven't had the chance to think about these things."

"Yeah, I guess there was a point in my life I didn't think college was even a possibility." Callie said.

Brandon met Callie's eyes. "You've come a long way. I'm proud of you."

"I'm trying." Callie nodded. "And I have you to thank for most of it."

"You know I would do anything for you. But give yourself some credit. Most people would have given up long ago and somehow you're still fighting."

"You give me a lot to fight for." Callie's gaze lingered on Brandon's loving eyes. His hand came up to cup her face and her eyes fluttered shut when his lips met hers. "I love you."

His lips curved into a smile as he kept his eyes locked with hers. "I love you too."

Thanks for reading! I apologize if the last chapter seemed like the end-it was not. There is still much more to come. Hope you'll all stick around for the ride!