Chapter 2: Diesel Dreaming 1

As SpongeBob went into his deep sleep, he ended up on a bed which happens to also be a hot rod, that is surrounded by darkness. Somehow resting in his… well... sleep and snoring loudly, SpongeBob's body suddenly inched forward towards the steering wheel of this bed and hot rod hybrid. With his eyes still closed, he pulled on a lever and began to drive. This led to the bed hot rod bursting out from what was supposed to be SpongeBob's pineapple. SpongeBob landed on the road and drifted to a stop, becoming fully awake in his dream.

SpongeBob: "Hot Dog, Daddy-O! My bed has transmogrified into a lean mean racing machine! Time to put the pedal to the metal, the rubber to the road, and the sponge to the street!"

SpongeBob then started to change his physical face to look all intimidating to prepare for burning some rubber. Two commentators, each named Rick and Dale, began to talk as the sponge was about to start.

Rick: "There's only one word to describe this, Dale."

Dale: "Yes… Really. Cool."

Rick: "That's two words, Dale, but thanks for playing! Anyway, this sponge is about to burn some real rubber here."

Dale: "Yeah, I can tell that he's ready to go, Rick. It will be really interesting to see where this takes the guy from here."

SpongeBob was counted down from three to one before he zoomed away, going through the first part of the race course.

SpongeBob: "I'm driving... I'm really driving! I'm driving! ... Hey, I can see Patrick's pad from here. Ah... I remember back this was all sea-bed… Good times... Good times... ... Me driving this thing gives me a real sense of adrenaline. Man, Bikini Bottom sure looks different these days…"

SpongeBob went through the first of two laps around the course. Then, as he was going through the second one, stuff began to collapse in front of the speeding sponge.

SpongeBob: "Holy fishpaste, even the floor has a mind of its own! ... Phew... The people who built this floor should be given a good talking to. Seriously, someone needs to hire a housekeeper; just look at the state of this place!"

Rick: "I'm inclined to agree with the sponge on this one, Dale. Every place and structure near the course shouldn't be in this poor-ass state."

Dale: "To be fair, it's difficult to maintain these things with the amount of wear and tear that happens around here, Rick."

Rick: "I suppose that point is also valid, Dale."

SpongeBob continued to go about his second lap before he crossed the final line, then stopped. After he did, SpongeBob made his face go back to the way that it was supposed to look like. He stood on top of the front of the car, celebrating the fact that he was able to drive.

SpongeBob: "Oh yeah! SpongeBob triumphs! Ah, if only Mrs. Puff could see me now... She'd be so proud that I passed my test and went on to be a hot rod driver- EXTRAORDINAIRE! ... Actually, come to think of it... … I don't remember actually passing my test. I must have my license on me somewhere... C'mon pants, don't let me down! ... Ah, my license... it's so shiny… and so- Wooah! Look at that handsome sponge!"

Plankton (SpongeBob's Dream Version): "Coming through! Out of the way, pipsqueak!"

SpongeBob: "Woah-oah-oah-oah!"

This Plankton (who's driving a hot rod himself), rammed into SpongeBob, causing the sponge to lose his grip on his license. The license was then blown away by the ocean's currents. Upon witnessing this unfortunate event unfold, the two commentators began to talk again.

Rick: "Well Dale, it looks like the new competitor has lost his license already!"

Dale: "Heello, is this thing on?"

Rick: "*sigh* Thanks for the feedback, Dale…"

SpongeBob: "*gasp* No, my license! ... It went through that door... Why?! Why?! Oh cruel sea, how you taunt this little yellow sponge! Curse you, underwater currents! You win again!"

Mrs. Puff: "Pss. SpongeBob."

SpongeBob: "Mrs. Puff...? Were you here this entire time?"

Mrs. Puff: "Uh, yes... Ahem. Anyway... if you want to get your driving license back, then you need to unlock the speed demon inside of you, SpongeBob."

SpongeBob: "Unlock the speed demon inside of me, huh? Stay shiny, license! I'm comin' to get ya!"

Mrs. Puff: "Now that you're on foot, come over to me and I can tell you a few more things, SpongeBob."

SpongeBob made his way over to Mrs. Puff, jumping over gaps and onto platforms. After that, he turned a few winches around to open up doors to get to her. The sponge didn't know why it was a chore to get to Mrs. Puff, but going through this set of obstacles came off as cumbersome to him. He also met a few other fish along the way, praising him for how well he did in his two laps around the race course. Going through a little bit further, SpongeBob noticed that he had to slam himself down on a button that was on the ground. After pressing the button, he was able to enter through a big door. As he came out at the other side, he saw his license being whoosed around some more by the currents before resting at a specific spot. However, he turned his attention over to Mrs. Puff, who started to speak.

Mrs. Puff: "You made it, SpongeBob! Well done! Now, I need to say this to you for the sake of convenience: You have the power to push spark blocks, such as this one, into their proper slots. After you do so, you'll find what it is you seek."

SpongeBob: "Really, Mrs. Puff?! Oh, you're the best!"

Mrs. Puff: "How about you save the compliments for when you actually get your license back?"

SpongeBob: "Alright, Mrs. Puff! I'll go and push this spark block into its slot. ... Heeeeave-hooo!"

Mrs. Puff: "Excellent, SpongeBob! You've successfully pushed your first spark block. *chuckle* My goodness, you're becoming one of my best pupils. Go ahead, retrieve your license."

SpongeBob nodded and dashed over to his license, since the pathway was now opened up. Before it whoosed away again, he managed to get it back and he was oh-so happy.

SpongeBob: "Oh, my lovely license! At last, I have found you! Never leave me again, okay?"

Another racer suddenly came through from the road, stopping by to see and taunt the little yellow sponge.

Patrick (SpongeBob's Dream Version): "Hey, SpongeBob… let's see if you have what it takes to beat the great Piston Patrick!"

SpongeBob: "Just because we're close, Patrick… doesn't mean I'll go easy on you, ya hear me?!"

Piston Patrick: "Loud and clear… Let's get this show on the road! … Quite literally."

SpongeBob: "Mrs. Puff, do you think that I can win?"

Mrs. Puff: "Certainly, SpongeBob. Why else did I say you're becoming one of my best pupils just a bit ago? I will give you my utmost support."

SpongeBob: "Thanks a lot, Mrs. Puff! With you cheering me on, I can't possibly lose!"

Piston Patrick: "C'mon, don't keep me waitin', SpongeBob!"

SpongeBob went all the way back to his hot rod bed, where he prepared to race his friend and rival. He checked to see if everything was indeed ready to go, then hopped into the vehicle. And so, SpongeBob changed his face again to make himself look intimidating. Of course, Piston Patrick wasn't scared; instead, he was thrilled to go about doing this race.

Piston Patrick: "Just try and keep up with my ride's pistons, SquarePants! I'm the fastest star on wheels!"

SpongeBob: "Bring it on, Patrick! I won't lose to your pistons!"

Rick: "So our youngest competitor's ready for his first real challenge, Dale!"

Dale: "Should be very interesting, Rick."

Rick: "Interesting, like grappling with an angry octopus, Dale!"

Dale: "Maybe not like that, but I'm still excited to see what turns up here."

Rick: "What? Were you somehow NOT expecting these two to race in a competitive fashion?"

Dale: "No, I expect it to be quite competitive, Rick. Just not VERY competitive."

Rick: "Either way, let's both see how this unfolds. Starfish versus Sponge, a true race of the undersea titans."

Dale: "A true race indeed, Rick… it's the truest of true! Best friends going at it to see who's the best of the two!"

Both SpongeBob and Piston Patrick were being counted down to one before the before zoomed away from the start; starting the three lapped race.

Dale: "Look at them go, this has already begun to be intense as hell!"

Rick: "Yeah, intense as blazing hellfire, Dale!"

SpongeBob: "I won't lose to you Patrick, eat this!"

Piston Patrick: "Oof-! You'll regret doing that, SquarePants! Here's a return gift for ya!"

After being slammed by SpongeBob's vehicle and slowing down, Piston Patrick sped up again and went past the sponge. He did this so that he can throw out bombs behind him and impede SpongeBob's progress. The little sponge gasped and avoided the bombs as best he could. Then, he used some of the boost pads on the course to slowly catch up with the grotesque starfish.

Rick: "After some initial struggle on the youngest competitor's side, it looks like he's starting to catch up to Piston Patrick."

Dale: "That may be the case, but this race is still far from over, Rick."

SpongeBob: "Here I come, super speeed sponge!"

Piston Patrick: "Not if I had anything to say about it, WOOOOO-HOOOO! Eat my dust, you'll never get past me!"

Rick: "This is crazy, Dale! Piston Patrick is really firing up those pistons of his!"

Dale: "This kind of thing makes everyone think to never underestimate their competitors, and this is no exception, Rick."

SpongeBob: "Blech! All this dust is getting in my mouth!"

Still in this first lap, more things began to collapse onto the course. Since this was SpongeBob's case of bad luck, they only collapsed after Piston Patrick made his way through. This led to the sponge still trying to avoid things that should not be on the track in the first place. Getting sick of this, he maneuvered in a way that launched him forward incredibly fast. That helped him get to an even state with Piston Patrick.

Piston Patrick: "So, you managed to avoid all of that nonsense... No matter, I'll still beat ya here! You better do something if you wanna win, we've just hit the halfway point of this second lap. I'd suggest you do everything you can to not get hit with a case of road rash! WOOOO-HOO-HOOOO!"

SpongeBob: "Tartar sauce, not again! Get back here!"

Piston Patrick: "Look at me still goin', SpongeBob! Eat this sand!"

All of the sand that Piston Patrick sent to him, caused SpongeBob to slow down. Sand got everywhere on the sponge, including his eyes. Meanwhile, more stuff began to fall onto the course after Piston Patrick roared by.

SpongeBob: "Woah! This racetrack is falling apart at the seams! Time for evasive action! Hrrr!"

SpongeBob pulled the steering wheel towards his left to make a crazy turn to what was left of that portion of the track. Recovering from his struggles, he continued forward by flooring it. If he wanted to win this race, then he was going to have to pull out all the stops.

SpongeBob: "Speed Speed! Speeeeed!"

Rick: "Look at the new competitor, he's really trying to stay in this race!"

Dale: "And who knows? Maybe he'll end up winning if he tries hard enough, Rick."

Rick: "That would be exciting to see, Dale."

Dale: "However, with Piston Patrick taking advantage of all of SpongeBob's inconveniences, it'll be difficult for him to catch up; let alone stay in the lead long enough to win."

Rick: "I don't know about you, Dale, but I see real potential in that sponge."

Piston Patrick: "C'mon! With a turn as pathetic as that, you might as well give up, SpongeBob!"

SpongeBob: "Never... Never! I will WIN this race!"

Piston Patrick: "I'd like to see you try after all that has happened to you! Hehehehe!"

SpongeBob and Piston Patrick both went through the second lap, with the former still lagging behind. Going on with the last lap, SpongeBob started to think that he couldn't beat Patrick like this. However, he knew that he couldn't lose this race. All that SpongeBob had to do was believe in his own abilities, which he ended up doing. Feeling a surge of this inspiration caused the sponge to push onward and strive for first place. This time, he was really putting the pedal to the metal as he floored once more.

Piston Patrick: "Huh? Well, look at you now... you look as though your determination is at an all-time high. It doesn't matter though; prepare for automotive annihilation, SpongeBob!"

SpongeBob: "How about you eat my bubbles, Patrick? Yyah!"

SpongeBob pushed a button on his hot rod that activated his bubble blaster. This was something that shoots bubbles and the sponge was planning on using it to win this race. He fired bubbles at Piston Patrick's wheels and axles, causing them to rust. This in turn made the starfish's vehicle slow down dramatically, and he was angry.

Piston Patrick: "Damn you, these were just fixed up for this race!"

SpongeBob: "See ya later, Patrick!"

SpongeBob sped through the rest of the third lap, reaching the finish line long before Piston Patrick could.

Rick: "SpongeBob has done it, folks! He has triumphed over his undersea titan opponent, Piston Patrick!"

Dale: "THAT was an awesome race, Rick. Those two just kept at each other, from beginning to end. That'll make for a great memory to relive for years to come."

SpongeBob: "Aw yeah, I'm the best!"

Plankton came by suddenly and wrecked SpongeBob's hot rod into many broken pieces.

Plankton (SpongeBob's Dream Version): "Whoops, sorry about that. Hehehehehe!"

SpongeBob: "Barnacles, my hot rod's been totalled! Why must things like this keep happening to me?!"

Rick: "Smashing a competitor's car, Dale... Is that against the rules?"

Dale: "There aren't any rules here, Rick."

Rick: "Reminds me of my first marriage, Dale! Ha-ha hahaha!"

SpongeBob started to make a mad dash over to get spare parts for his broken hot rod. But, that journey to get those spare parts would prove to be more challenging than he thought. Random fish began to attack the poor little sponge. Just then, Mrs. Puff's voice came through to reach SpongeBob's ears.

Mrs. Puff: "SpongeBob, do you hear me? I'm not with you, but I can help you out by telling you things like this: You can defend yourself by using something called the "Sand Slap" attack."

SpongeBob: "I can? Since when?"

Mrs. Puff: "Since now. ... Bah! That doesn't matter, just defend yourself from those ruffians with your Sand Slap attack. Hurry, they're coming!"

SpongeBob: "Oh dear, Neptune! Can't we be pals, guys?! Wooah, I guess not! I suppose you guys aren't really in a chatting mood…"

SpongeBob successfully dealt with all the ruffians there and took a breather, feeling tired already.

Mrs. Puff: "Way to go, SpongeBob! Now you can focus on getting those spare parts to fix your hot rod. And I'll cheer you on, whenever I feel as though it's necessary."

SpongeBob: "*pant* Once again, thanks for the indirect help, Mrs. Puff! *pant*"

When SpongeBob was ready to move forward, he stood up and stretched for a bit. Protecting himself from ruffians was only a small portion of SpongeBob's venture in obtaining spare parts. He would soon come to know what else was going to be thrown his way in this auto repair district.

Author's Notes: SpongeBob's dream so far had the sponge himself drive about, retrieve his driving license, and race against Piston Patrick. Now though, SpongeBob seems to have found himself in another problem; his hot rod was smashed into pieces. Thanks to that, the sponge has to find spare parts to repair his hot rod, so that he can continue to race. So far, he has dealt with several ruffians as a start to this daunting fix. What sorts of other complications will there be to impede SpongeBob's progress? What races will SpongeBob compete in after he fixes his hot rod? Next chapter, Chapter 3: Diesel Dreaming 2.