"Today's the day," he hummed into her ear as he wrapped his hands across her stomach.

"I know, I'm so excited to see this little peanut," she smiled brightly. They saw the small blob at 5 weeks after she got her IUD out, as they checked for a miscarriage. The baby was just a small tiny cluster bub that they immediately felt overjoyed for.

"And we get to take our first family trip," he whispered to the bump on her stomach.

"What if you're family doesn't like me?"

"Mer, they are going to love you. Amelia adores you already, and my mom is easy. Nancy is the only one who will kind of be rough around the edges. She also lives the perfect life and thinks everyone should live like she does, with her perfect husband and house, their three perfect kids. She's insane," he chuckled a bit and she had a blank, unamused look on her face.

"Not funny, I'm scared. First Christmas for the kids not at home, what if they think I'm a bad mother," she replied.

"You are worrying too much. We will be back in a week, it's not like we will be staying there anyway. We will be staying a few miles away in my house," he assured her.

"Yes, the house you shared with your wife. That makes me feel even better," she replied.

"It's not like that Mer. Lexie and Mark will be there too. Plus Amelia is bringing Owen so that should make for a great show," he laughed.

"Owen is a war hero."

"Amelia is a recovering addict, my sisters are going to go nuts," he laughed.

"This is going to suck," she mumbled as she cursed herself for agreeing to go. They each got dressed, the girls were finishing their last day at school before winter break and had already got on the bus. The pair migrated into the kitchen where CJ was enjoying his breakfast and watching his favorite show.

"You excited to see where I use to live bud?" Derek asked the boy as he ruffled his blonde locks.

"Yes! I can't wait to see the snow," he said excitingly. Although they lived in Seattle, snow was rare. They got their things together, Derek packed the car for the most part as they were picking up the girls from school and heading to the airport.

"My neck pillow?"

"Check," he smiled as he held it up to show her.

"iPad's and chargers?"

"Yep."

"Latest medical journal?"

"Of course," he laughed.

"Snacks?"

"Yes Meredith, now get in the car before we are late. I'm ready to see Jellybean," he joked.

"Shh," she looked over at CJ mindlessly playing on his iPad at the car door, waiting on someone to help him in. Derek rolled his eyes as he helped put CJ in the car. They drove to the hospital where they took CJ to the daycare and hurried to the OB wing of the hospital.

"I'm nervous," she stated.

"Nothing to worry about," he smiled politely at her.

"I just have a weird feeling," she said honestly.

"Probably jellybean just rolling around," he winked. The pair waited until the nurse called her name. The pair went in, she did the routine weight check, urine sample, and questions that she had gone through multiple times. They were sat in the exam room where a portable ultrasound machine sat in the corner. It was just a few seconds before the OB came into the room.

"You guys excited?" She smiled at the pair.

"Yes," Derek replied as he held her hand. She began the exam, pulling her pants just at her hip bone and placing a sheet into the rim of her jeans. She placed the cold gel on her abdomen as she began the exam.

"There's the uterus, you can see right there a little bouncing baby," she pointed as she zoomed in on the picture. The small little baby was moving around so much, she struggled to keep it still.

"There's my boy," he smiled widely, looking at the ultrasound.

"Or girl," Meredith stared at the screen. The two sat in awe as the little heartbeat flooded the room, their eyes locked and her breathing hitched in her throat. She thought back to the time she was pregnant with CJ. Charlie was so excited, he just knew it was a boy from the moment he saw the tiny peanut on the screen. His face was similar to the way Derek's lit up as he watched the little baby across the screen.

"Baby is so active, it's hard to get a good measurement, but the best I can get is a July 29th due date which is based off your last period so baby is a good size," she replied as she printed out the pictures she got.

"Oh, close to CJ's birthday," Meredith smiled.

"So I'll see you back in four weeks for another check up, you can get cleaned up. Baby wipes for you stomach is over there. Congratulations mom and dad," she smiled as she handed them the pictures.

"Our baby is beautiful," he commented.

"It looks like a little alien," she giggled at him and kissed him.

"Now we get to tell the kids."

"I'm a little scared."

"Don't be, they are going to be excited," he kissed her once more before helping her off the table and they went to schedule the next appointment. The pair went to pick up CJ and off to the school to pick up the girls. Meredith quickly wrapped the pictures up and placed them inside two little gift bags for the girls to open. They arrived at the school, Derek went inside to collect them as she placed the bags on their seats.

"Hi mom," Scarlett said happily as she got in the car.

"What's this?" Zoe asked as she got the bag before climbing into her car seat.

"Ok girls, don't open it yet. Wait for Derek," she said as Derek climbed into the car.

"Go ahead," he nodded at the two excited girls. They pulled the tissue paper from the bags and they both were confused for a second.

"Surprise," Meredith smiled at them.

"Are we going to have a baby sister?" Scarlett asked.

"We don't know yet but there is a baby in my stomach."

"Baby?" CJ chirped.

"Yes. You are going to be a big brother!" Meredith smiled at the boy, "but when we get to New York, don't tell anyone yet. It is going to be a surprise for them."

"Zoe we are going to be sisters forever," Scarlett said happily.

"Zo, what's wrong?" Derek looked at his daughter.

"I don't want to have another sibling. I got mine already," she said honestly.

"But now you get one more," Scarlett replied to her.

"I don't want another one," she said and the girls began to argue. Derek looked at Meredith who looked almost like she was going to cry.

"Zoe, why don't you want another sibling?"

"Because, we don't have enough room for one at our house and then where is it going to go when we go back home?" She began to ask a bunch of questions.

"Well, we are going to sell our house and move in together to become a family. There will always be room for all of you guys, even if I have to build a house," he said to her.

"I just want to go see nana," she whispered as she looked out the window. He sighed, looking at a teary eyed Meredith. She quickly looked away out the window, he placed a hand on her thigh before putting the car in drive and heading to the airport. This was going to be a long trip.

They had put the car in park just in time to grab everything and hurry to get check in through security. This was CJ's first time flying, he was calm as long as he was distracted with his iPad. They finally got to the plane just in time, Lexie and Mark waited by the gate. Scarlett rushed into Lexie's arms when she saw her.

"Aunt Lexie!" Zoe ran over to her just as quick.

"Alright girls, lets go," Derek quickly corralled the girls into the plane.

"I have a secret," Meredith whispered to Lexie.

"What did you do?" Lexie whispered back as the two followed each other through the tunnel and to their seats. Derek was quick to grab the bags from her and put them in the overhead. Derek and the girls sat together while Mark sat with CJ. Meredith and Lexie got their seats and Meredith showed her the ultrasound.

"No!" Lexie gasp.

"Yes. I am carrying a little Shepherd," she replied.

"Are we happy about this?" Lexie asked honestly.

"Yes, I think so," she glanced back at Derek who was being talked to by each girl but he had the biggest smile on his face.

"Aw," she hugged Meredith the best she could.

"I know. I'm terrified. I mean I'm happy but I can't stop thinking about Charlie. The hormones," she began to tear up.

"Look, I know it sucks. This is the first Christmas without him, and you are in love with another man and your feelings are all mixed up but he would have wanted this. You happy," Lexie assured her.

"I hope so," Meredith sighed.

"So you excited for the first Shepherd Christmas?"

"No. I don't even know all of his sisters and there's just too many," Meredith said honestly.

"Ok well I still don't have all the kids memorized and this is my third one. But Nancy is the oldest, married to Tom. She's an OBGYN and likes everyone to know. Then there is Kathleen, she's married to Calvin and she's the only one who isn't surgery happy. She's a psychiatrist. Then Lizzie, who will probably kill you if you call her Elizabeth. She's the closest in age to Derek, has the most kids, and can give Cristina a run for her money in Cardio. And Amelia which you know her already but I don't know if she's coming."

"She is, I told her I'd probably kill her if she left me to the wolves," Meredith laughed.

"Carolyn is a doll. She really reminds me of my mom. She going to be a bit much coming from Ellis but she's amazing," Lexie said with a smile.

"I'm a stranger who has been dating her son for a few months and coming to the family Christmas with two kids and pregnant with her newest grandchild," Meredith replied.

"The more the merrier with Carolyn. She loves kids. You are going to do great," Lexie assured her.

"I hope so," Meredith sighed, looking out the window. She was more nervous than she had ever been to meet someone's parents. She didn't do the family situation, she hated families. Especially the big loving ones that spend every holiday together. She managed to doze off for a bit before the flight attendant came over the speaker indicating the flight was preparing to land.

"Mama, look at all the buildings!" Scarlett said in amazement.

"I see, it's so big isn't it!" She exclaimed back at her daughter smiling happily. Zoe was still quiet, Meredith wanted to know why she was so upset about the news. The plane slowly descended into the airport and they began to get off the plane. They gathered their things and headed to baggage claim where they picked up luggage on a cart and wheeled it to get their rental car. Meredith and Derek got the car seats in the car and strapped the kids in the SUV.

"You nervous?" Derek chuckled as he looked over at Meredith.

"How can you tell?" She looked at him, worry covered her face. She could hold back words but her face said it all.

"You have a horrible poker face," he laughed as he drove through the city to the interstate. They drove just outside of town, almost to Connecticut where they pulled on to a street filled with homes. They were fairly spread apart, each designed differently but all had similarities. They pulled into a beautiful home, definitely built in 1960's but had been renovated to match modern times.

"This is your moms house?" Meredith questioned.

"No, this is my house. I let my nephew and his friend rent it while he's in college. I told him he had to stay at mom's house while we were in town," he laughed.

"It's so pretty," she said as they got out of the car.

"Wow Derek, I didn't know you did all that siding," Mark mentioned as he stepped out of the car.

"Yeah, did it a few years back. Bad storm ruined my siding so I had it replaced. Something to make it unique," he smiled at the rugged, textured siding that almost looked like shutter tiles.

"Hey Zoe, go show Scarlett your room," Derek nodded to the girls. They all walked inside the house. It was still furnished just the way he had left it. He gave his nephew and his roommates the two spare rooms so they wouldn't bother his master bedroom and Zoe's room.

"Just like I left it," he smiled slightly at the home he had missed so much.

"Mark, Lexie, you guys are staying in the spare room on the left down the hallway," Derek directed them and they took their things to the room to get settled. Meredith looked around the room, it was definitely a cozy home, looked so much like she expected. There were pictures hanging throughout the living room of some art, a few family photos remained on the table by the entrance of the home. Meredith couldn't help but go over and pick one up.

"Rose was beautiful," Meredith remarked. She had dark brown hair just like Zoe, she had very structured cheek bones and her smile was warm. She could tell they were such a happy family, it almost broke her heart to see those pictures.

"She was, but so are you," he said coming up behind her.

"You ready to go meet my family?" He suggested.

"As ready as I can be," she breathed. Nervous didn't describe the feeling in her stomach. A mix of morning sickness with her anxiety had her through the roof, ready to run at any second.