Author's Note: I am so glad to be back into this story the way I am, I'm sorry it took a while to post this. I re-wrote it four times before I liked this one. It's different from what I usually write, I like writing happy fluff but I know I needed a little something different in this story. It's a long one for me, i hope you guys are enjoying reading this as much as I have been writing it! Love seeing the reviews from you guys! Thanks for reading

The loud alarm blared in her ear, it was like a siren and her brain was still in a whirlwind. The past three days had seemed to just seem like one huge nightmare to her. She felt around the empty spot next to her, her eyes still struggling to stay open. She had to go back to work today, no matter how much she didn't want to. Her whole body just felt numb, she was already scheduled herself a light day for the day but she wanted to ask one of the fellows to cover her shift. The hospital would understand, but she knew it would help her mind stay busy. She checked her phone, a text from Derek letting her know he took the kids to school and left her breakfast downstairs. She smiled, he was so understanding of the situation. He did everything he could to keep things easy for her and took on the kids without blinking an eye.

She called Mark, he hadn't left the hospital since the accident. He let her know there hadn't been any change in anything really. They were planning to wean her sedation today to access the extent of her brain damage. The good news through it all was the baby was healthy, there was a heartbeat at least. She knew it was going to be a long road to recovery for her sister, she could still remember the day she found out she had a sister. It was like a whirlwind of emotions but Charles had convinced her she needed to get to know her. That was the best decision she had made. She couldn't imagine her life without Lexie at this point, or even what is left of her. She hated to think the way she was thinking but the doctor in her knew how the outcomes will be. It took her longer than usual to finally get the strength to pull herself out of bed, she felt like she was in a pit of darkness. She didn't have the energy to do anything to her hair or face so she just splashed water on herself and pulled her hair into a ponytail to keep it out of her face and not look like a complete mess. She looked between the comfortable leggings and the scrubs and cursed herself every second for not calling in today as she slid into her scrubs.

The silent drive to the hospital was very lonely, normally she would have Derek to at least keep her company, though she was grateful he took the kids with him. She didn't have the energy or drive to keep up with them. They didn't know anything about Lexie and she wanted to keep it that way as long as she possibly could. She couldn't help but look at the time as she sat in her park car for a second longer, she knew she would be later than she already was. She wanted to go see Lexie before her shift but she hated seeing Mark the way he was and she also knew Thatcher would be there. That was a whole different conversation she didn't want to have. She managed to avoid him at every possible moment since Lexie had been in the hospital. Their relationship was very odd. They would speak on occasion and that was it. They had a strained relationship from the start, she still couldn't forgive him even though her mother was mostly to blame for him not being in her life. As a parent now, she knew nothing would ever stop her from being in her children's life.

She finally reached her office where she sat down at her desk, not a second later there was a knock on her door and it opened without her response.

"How you holding up?" Amelia asked. She had checked on Meredith every day, she was grateful to have her. She was slowly becoming the sister she didn't know she wanted. Amelia and her were very similar in different ways. She just felt a connection between them, like they were friends in a past life.

"I'm ok," Meredith lied. She knew she wasn't ok. Her sister could become a vegetable at any time.

"You're lying. If this were me and any one of my sisters, I wouldn't know what to do. Well except Nancy maybe," Amelia admitted. Meredith let out a small chuckle at the Nancy comment.

"I know. There just isn't anything anyone can do and I feel helpless, you know?" She said.

"I get it. Hey I'm here if you need anything. I gotta go check on Mark and get the process started," Amelia said with a smile before she left. Meredith was grateful to have such a good support system, it was almost calming to know so many people cared about her. She grabbed her tablet and knew it was time to start her day. She rounded on her patients for the day, she had two hernia repairs and a colonoscopy for her short day. Three easy procedures, something she didn't need to focus too hard on.

She started on her procedures, she was in and out easily on all three of them. She felt dread to know what was next, they had began slowly pulling Lexie out of her coma five hours ago, she knew she wanted to be there when she woke up.

"Meredith?" Bailey said, coming up behind her as she had just finished updating her last chart for the day.

"Hey Bailey," Meredith replied. The relationship between the two was very tense, after Richard left and Bailey took over, it was like a completely different Miranda.

"I was thinking, maybe you should just take the rest of the week off. I understand you're going through a lot and take the time to step back. You have a lot on your plate and this is a hard time for all of us," Bailey admitted.

"Why? Did Derek say something?" She asked.

"No. We haven't really spoke. I just know being in your condition on top of the situation with Lexie is a lot. You deserve happiness Meredith and this baby is like a new chapter for you," Bailey said hushed. It wasn't long ago Bailey had suffered a miscarriage, with her age she was already high risk.

"Oh. Thank you. I know I never said anything but I'm sorry for your loss Bailey," Meredith said to her.

"Thank you. Now go be with Lexie," Bailey replied with a reassuring smile. That was the Bailey Meredith was use to. She had become soft over the years, but with her position she had completely changed. She was on her way to Lexie's room when she was met with Derek who also was going as support.

"Hey," she tried to smile at him.

"Hey," he replied.

"How were the kids this morning," she asked.

"Good. The girls are thinking something is up and keep asking questions. I try to keep it as short as possible," he said.

"I know. I'm sorry. Thank you for this," she smiled at him.

"Don't apologize, it's no problem. You have a lot on your plate and you are carrying our baby. You need the least amount of stress possible," he couldn't help but notice her glow, she had been glowing for a few weeks and he just loved it. The glow has faded with her stress levels recently and he wanted that back.

"I have to be honest, I'm a littler nervous," she admitted.

"I know. Amelia is the second best," he winked and she giggled a bit. He loved to hear that sound. They finally arrived at the room, Mark and Thatcher were sitting down. Amelia was in the room with one of her nurses.

"She's going to wake up soon, I've explained to them what to expect. She's going to be groggy and probably confused. We will ask her a serious of questions and have her respond if she can," Amelia told Meredith. She knew how the process worked, it was a waiting game. That was the worst part of neuro. It was like she heard them talking, Lexie's eyes began to flutter, she looked around. She looked terrified, the intubation tube prevented her from talking.

"Lexie, I know you are confused. Don't try to fight the intubation. We are going to remove it soon. I just wanted to check on your brain functions. I'm going to ask you a few questions. Blink twice for no, three times for yes," Amelia said, "do you understand me?"

Lexie blinked three times. You could feel the tension in the room slowly disappeared as they realized she was still here.

"Do you know where you are?"

It took her a second, she looked around the room. Her eyes were watering and she had the most terrifying look on her face. She blinked twice.

"You were in an accident, do you remember that?"

She blinked twice. Meredith held back tears, she looked up at Derek and he pulled her to his side.

"Hey Lex, do you know who I am?" Mark was quick to jump up, grabbing her hand. His voice was shaking, he had tears rolling down his cheek. He was scared, terrified even. It took her a second to respond, she had tears rolling down her cheeks as she nodded yes the best she could. He let out a relieved sigh, caressing her cheek.

"You're going to be ok Lex," he cried to her, kissing her hand and squeezing it tightly. She was crying as well.

"Are you in pain Lexie?" Amelia asked.

She nodded her head yes. Unable to blink the response due to her tears filling her eyes.

"Ok, I am going to sedate you again, give you some time to heal," Amelia replied. She quickly shook her head the best she could, grabbing at her stomach. Her eyes were watering worse than before.

"Hey, hey. The baby is ok Lex. We have to give you some time to heal. I'm not leaving your side," Mark was quick to grab her attention. She blinked her tears away as she looked at him. She nodded and slowly closed her eyes. Mark squeezed her hand as the nurse began to sedate her again. He wiped his tears away.

"She's going to be ok Mark," Meredith said, she couldn't hold back the tear anymore. Her heart was beating out of her chest, she felt relieved.

"This is good Mark," Amelia replied.

"I know," he nodded, bowing his head.

"We are going to give you some time, let us know if you need anything," Derek said to him, releasing Meredith for a second. He went over to pat Mark's shoulder. Meredith saw the tears in Derek's eyes. She didn't realize this was effecting him as well.

"Mark, she is a fighter," Meredith quipped. He just nodded, his head still hanging low. Derek rubbed his shoulder, trying to reassure him. He walked away, grabbing Meredith's hand. He lead them down the hall to the elevator. Once the doors closed, she broke. She couldn't hold it back anymore.

"She's ok," Meredith sobbed, Derek was quick to grab her in a hug. He squeezed her tightly, letting her break in his arms. She cried and cried, she couldn't manage to find words for how she was feeling. She was so relieved to know she was still there to an extent. She knew she would never be the same Lexie but she was alive. At the same time, she was traumatized by the look on Lexie's face in that hospital bed. The look of fear and worry in her eyes absolutely killed her.

"I love you," he whispered in her ear as he just held her tightly. She continued to sob into his chest, she couldn't make it stop. She was under so much stress, it was horrible. When Lexie responded, a weight was lifted off her shoulders. It was like her luck was slowly turning around. The elevator dinged, letting them know it was stopped. They pulled apart, Meredith quickly wiped her eyes and pulled herself together as they stepped off the elevator.

"Take out for dinner?" She offered. It was like the lived on take out for the past few weeks. Meredith was too exhausted to attempt to cook anyway.

"Yeah, sounds great. I'll pick it up on the way home. You going to get the girls?" He asked.

"Yes," she nodded. They shared a quick kiss before going separate ways. Derek still had to finish his charts and round once more on his patients. Meredith headed to her office to gather her things, she was quick to finish and head to the daycare where she picked up CJ. He happily talked Meredith's ear off about his day as the pair walked to her car. She helped him get in and buckled his seatbelt for him. It was going to be a surprise for the girls, since she hadn't been around much since Lexie's accident. She hoped they assumed she was working late and nothing was wrong. She didn't want too many questions of the girls.

As she pulled into the car rider line at the girls school, she couldn't help but realize soon, she would be picking up all three of the children. CJ was going to start preschool here the next school year and her heart ached. She glanced back at the boy who had fallen asleep in his car seat, his head hung to the side and she smiled at him. She had never felt so much joy being a mother, her children were her entire world. The line began to move forward and the girls jumped into the car quickly, ready to go home.

"Girls, how was school?" Meredith asked as she pulled out of the school.

"Good!" They both said in unison. She remembered a time where Scarlett happily shared every detail of the school day but as she got older, she just kept her replies short. Meredith took the long way home, enjoying the sound of her children. She got a new lease on life, knowing her sister was alive and recovering and she had a healthy baby growing in her belly. As she pulled into the house, CJ woke up from his power nap and quickly unbuckled himself. The four of them went into the house. They all scattered, Zoe went to the kitchen to start on her homework.

"Hey Zoe, can I talk to you?" Meredith asked, sitting down next to her.

"Sure," she shrugged. She had become distant from the family after she found out about the baby. Meredith wanted her family to be happy.

"Are you ok?"

"Yep."

"I don't think you are being honest with me. You can talk to me Zoe," Meredith assured her.

"I don't want another sibling," she admitted.

"Why?" Meredith questioned

"Because," she shrugged.

"That's not a good enough answer for me Zoe," Meredith replied.

"I don't want daddy to forget about me. I miss living in New York when it was just us," she said honestly. Meredith was shocked. She didn't even think about how all this change was effecting Zoe.

"Oh Zoe, your dad won't forget about you. I know you miss your family back in New York but you have to know I love you very much and I'm so glad you guys moved here," Meredith told her. Zoe looked at her with tears in her eyes. She was truly hurting and it broke Meredith's heart.

"I love you Meredith and I am glad we live here and I am glad to have Scarlett and CJ as my brother and sister but I don't want everything to change again," she began to cry. Meredith pulled the little girl to her and hugged her tightly.

"I am sorry I never asked you how you felt before. You have to let me and your dad know when you feel like this Zoe," Meredith said to the girl as she rubbed circles around her back as she held her.

"I want you to be my mom Meredith," she cried.

"I will be Zoe, and I won't ever try to replace your mom," Meredith whispered to her. She placed a kiss on top of her curly hair and pulled her away. She wiped away the girls tears.

"You know, this baby is going to change a lot but we will still be the same family. Just adding one more to love. When mom's and dad's have more babies, it just means their heart has to grow even bigger," Meredith informed her.

"So you guys won't forget me," Zoe breathed.

"We could never forget our Zoe," Meredith smiled at the girl. She was relieved to finally get to talk to her and get the whole story. She felt this urge to just hold her tightly. Meredith was never the loving type growing up, she never seen herself having children to begin with. When she met Charles, it was like this light switch flipped and she discovered this piece of her was missing. She was terrified to be a mother but to now know what she does, she wouldn't change it for the world. She also didn't understand how she could love someone else's child which scared her the most when Charles died. She thought she would just be the widow forever but seeing Zoe in her arms as she was, she knew she needed to be the mother Zoe needed. She knew what it was like to grow up without a motherly figure and she would never put this girl through it, she loved her like she was her own daughter.

"After we eat dinner, want to go get ice cream?" Meredith asked her. She nodded, looking up innocently at Meredith.

"Zoe, I know I'm not your real mom but I'm going to try my best to be your mom. I love you," Meredith hugged her tightly, just enjoying the embrace. She would do anything for her just as she would her own children.