"Incoming!"
Mario looked up and abandoned the chart he was filling out. An emergency was always more important than paperwork.
"Dr Dixon, with me!" he shouted. Elliot joined him as they rushed out into the ambulance bay.
"What have we got?" Mario asked.
"OD. We already gave Narcan in the field. She's not improving yet."
Mario quickly registered the other information the EMT was giving him, but he was distracted. He knew who this was.
"Alyssa?" he said, quickly doing his checks.
"You know her?" Dr Dixon asked.
"No. I mean, yes. She's an old friend. I haven't seen her in a while."
"Another incoming!", someone yelled. Mario looked at his friend, Alyssa. And he knew what he had to do.
'Dr. Dixon, you take her. I'll get the incoming."
He left Alyssa in Dr Dixon's care, trusting that the third-year resident was capable of handling it, and left to care for the new arrival.
"Jesse!" He yelled as he wheeled in a victim of the car crash. "We're in Code Black!"
Jesse nodded and flipped a switch, indicating code black on the screen.
Everything was happening fast, and Mario felt in his element. This was his job. And he was damn good at it. For the next hour, the ER was a circus. And Mario was the ringmaster tonight.
When he finally caught a break, he decided to go check on Alyssa. He knew Dr Dixon would have come and got him if she'd died on the table. He found Elliot first.
"Dr Dixon. Can you give me a status on the overdose brought in earlier?"
"Dr Savetti, of course. Let me check… Alyssa Meyers, brought in with a heroin overdose. She coded on the table, but we brought her back. She's stable now. Do you want to go see her?"
"Please," Mario said while gesturing at Elliot to lead the way.
"Ms. Meyers, how are you feeling?" Elliot asked her when they arrived and saw Alyssa awake.
Her eyes were shifting around the area, finally focusing on Mario. She frowned.
"Hello Alyssa," Mario said softly.
"Mario?" she asked. He nodded.
"I… how… what happened?" she asked.
"You overdosed on heroin and alcohol. Dr Dixon here saved your life," Mario replied. He motioned at Elliot to leave him with Alyssa. Luckily, he got the message.
"I'll come back to check up on you in a little while," Elliot told Alyssa, before leaving.
"Alyssa," Mario sighed. He took her hand.
"What happened to you?" he asked her.
She didn't answer him and pulled her hand away.
"Alyssa, please? Last time I saw you, you were doing okay. You were clean."
"Yes, well, that was a long time ago, wasn't it?" she said. Her tone was accusive.
Mario's jaw clenched. He bit his lip and looked away.
"You left," she added. "And I tried, Mario, I did. And it worked, for a while." She paused and looked around, then back at Mario.
"And you got out of the game, it seems. Good for you," she added. "But things weren't so rosy for me, you know. You had a plan after you got clean. Finish medical school, do a residency, become a doctor. But me, I didn't have anything. And after you shut me out, I didn't have anyone."
"Alyssa… I'm sorry. I-"
Before Mario could continue, his pager beeped.
"I have to run, I'll come by later again, okay?"
Alyssa scoffed and turned away. Mario couldn't stay, he had to go deal with new incoming patients.
A bit later, Jesse found Mario standing by the nurses' station, looking at Alyssa from afar.
"A former lover?" Jesse asked.
Mario looked up. He was so focused on Alyssa that he hadn't heard Jesse approach. He shook his head.
"No. We have a… complicated history."
He sighed.
"Come on, tell your mama. It's no use keeping it all bottled up," Jesse said.
Mario gave him a smirk.
After a pause, he revealed: "We used to get high together. Shoot up. Back in New York."
Jesse put a hand on his shoulder.
"The last time I saw her, was right after we both got clean. And part of the twelve-step program is cutting out toxic relationships, to focus on yourself. So, I cut out everyone in my life at that time. Because of the drugs, every single person in my life was toxic. I needed to do it on my own. And I did."
He sighed and gestured at Alyssa.
"But she didn't," he added. Jesse gave him a pitiful look.
"Don't, mama. Don't do that," Mario said. "I'm not looking for pity. I worked hard to get to this place, where I can be around drugs all the time and not feel tempted. I worked two jobs putting myself through medical school, and I moved across the country to work in the best ER in this country. I did that. The drugs, my addiction. They're in the past, but they're a part of my story."
"I know," Jesse replied. "But she's also a part of that story. And her story probably didn't turn out the way she wanted it to."
Mario rolled his shoulders.
"I don't know how to fix this. She's right, I abandoned her. I left town and never looked back", he said.
"And she's here now. Talk to her. You don't have to fix everything that's broken. But maybe you're in a place right now where you can help her heal."
Mario bit his lip and nodded. Maybe he was.
Carefully, he approached Alyssa's bed again.
She was awake and looked up as he came closer.
"You're still here," she said.
"Yeah, I'm pulling double shifts tonight and I'm near the end of the second one, so…"
Mario trailed off.
"You look good," Alyssa commented.
"You don't," Mario replied. Alyssa snorted.
"Yeah, well, the drugs'll do that to you."
Hearing Alyssa's Brooklyn accent made him flash back to when he first met her. Mario was a functioning drug addict, meaning that he was able to still show up to class and pay attention while being high. Whereas Alyssa was always a sloppy addict, she was never coherent and could barely remember what happened.
Mario was sure that if the drugs had caused him to lose his memory, he would've gotten cleaner much earlier. But he'd always kept making excuses. He could still function while chasing a high, and that was dangerous.
Alyssa seemed to be having similar thoughts. She smiled.
"Do you remember, when you were in your second year, pre-med, we used to get high every Friday and you'd still show up to class on Monday, having read everything you had to read? I always wondered how you could do that. I mean, you were like superman. You worked two jobs, went to school full-time and still had time for some fun," she grinned.
Mario swallowed and looked away.
"It wasn't fun. It was to take away the stress and… to forget everything that happened to me. It was unhealthy, and it took way more from me than it ever gave me."
"You're a buzzkill," she replied.
"Alyssa, look. I want to help you. Okay? I want to help you get better. There's a clinic not too far from here, and I promise, when you get out, when you're clean… you can crash at my place for a while. I'll help you find a job, get you back on your feet. How does that sound?"
Alyssa shook her head.
"No. I'm not… I'm fine. I don't need your help. I have a job. And I live with my boyfriend, so it's all good."
"Boyfriend, huh? He the one that gave you the drugs?" Mario asked, getting angry. Drug addicts lived in dangerous, vicious cycles. It was so easy to take advantage of them. Mario knew that whoever her boyfriend was, he wouldn't be good news.
"I don't need you. Just, leave, will you? When can I get out of here?" she asked.
Mario tried to get through to her, but looking in her eyes, he could tell that she wasn't there yet. You couldn't help someone who didn't want to be helped. Mario knew that all too well.
"Okay. I'll check in with Dr. Dixon and get your discharge papers started. Just… if you ever need anything, or if you're ready to get help, you know where to find me. I promise I'll do everything in my power to help you."
Alyssa nodded reluctantly.
Half an hour later, Mario saw her leave the hospital. He couldn't have helped her. She didn't want his help. Or any help.
Hours later, he finally clocked out. It had been a long night, and since he'd pulled a double shift, he was exhausted. He didn't live far from the hospital, knowing that nights like these would tear him down if had to have a two hour commute each morning. So, ten minutes after leaving the hospital, he was home. His apartment was empty. He quickly checked the calendar and smiled.
He made himself some breakfast and sat down at his kitchen island.
He took his phone out of his pocked and dialed a number. After a few seconds, a familiar face popped up on his screen.
"Morning, Dr Kean," he teased. Noa's face lit up on his screen.
"Hey Mario, you caught me at a good time. My shift starts in an hour, so I have a little time to talk. How are you? How was work?"
Mario smiled.
"It was good. Hectic, long. But good. I uh... I saw an old friend of mine. I don't think I've ever told you about her. Her name's Alyssa Meyers. We used to be friends in New York."
"Is she okay? Did you see her at the hospital?"
"Yeah she… she came in with a heroin overdose."
"Oh, Mario…"
"Yeah, she's that kind of friend. She's fine. It was just a surprise to see her here, in LA. I tried to get her help, but she didn't want to."
Noa gave him a sympathetic smile.
"You've said it yourself many times, Mario. You can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves."
"I know, but still… She used to be someone I depended on. And she depended on me, and I ripped that away from her when I left."
"You left to help you. To realize your dream. How many people can say that Mario? You got out. And your experiences have made you an even better doctor. That's what counts."
Mario smiled.
"I miss you," he replied.
Noa smiled back.
"I miss you too. So much. Just 4 more months, and we get to see each other for a whole week," she joked.
Mario groaned.
"This is killing me," he said.
"I know," Noa replied. "But we can get through it. It's just one year, and then my residency here is over. And I'll be able to work anywhere."
Noa paused, and then smiled again.
"Actually, I have some news. I've been in talks with a hospital in downtown LA. It's not ideal, but it's a great hospital and they are in the process of renewing their maternity wing completely. By the time I finish my residency here, they will be finished with the constructions. So, nothing's final yet, but they've made a very generous offer for me to work there. And of course, there's something else in LA that would make this a very easy decision for me…"
"Say yes, please say yes!" Mario replied, a huge grin on his face.
"I already did," she replied.
Noa had to leave for her shift a few minutes later, but Mario ended the call with that grin still plastered on his face. Finally, they had some clear vision of their future together. Noa would be a kickass OB and Mario could still be an attending at Angels Memorial. It was the best future he could have gotten.
Before turning off the lights and heading to bed, he looked at the faint scars on his arm. He had more between his toes and in other hidden places on his body. His thumb grazed over them. No longer did he need drugs to chase a high. He chased his highs in way healthier ways now, spending hours upon hours saving lives. Bringing back people from the brink of death, that was his high now.
He couldn't think of a better addiction to have.