Chapter 17

Elizabeth made her way into town after closing up the schoolhouse for the day. She honestly wasn't sure what she was going to tell Nathan, she knew that he probably wasn't going to like what she had to say, but he was a big part of her life now and he deserved to be a part of the decision - making process. She had already made up her mind that she was going to finally allow him to read the book, hoping that it would help ease her into the conversation. She had decided that there really was no easy way to approach the subject of her leaving for a whole month, but it wasn't the being gone for a whole month part that had her worried, it was that Lucas was going to accompany her since his parents were going to be there as well. Nathan had come a long way since they had finally declared their feelings for one another, but she still sensed an uneasiness about him whenever Lucas' name was mentioned.

Before she knew it, she found herself standing outside of the Northwest Mounted Police Office, staring at the door. Part of her hoped that maybe he wasn't inside, but she knew better because Newton was standing outside, roped to the post. She frowned and gave Newton a short pat down his neck, "Well no use in delaying this." She inhaled a large breath and slowly released it before climbing the steps to the door.

Nathan was standing at his desk, reading through reports, when the door swung open. He turned to see Elizabeth stepping inside his office and immediately smiled at her, "Hey, I was just about to finish up and come find you. I was going to see if maybe you and Jack wanted to grab some dinner with us tonight at the café."

She made an attempt to smile back at him, but he could tell something wasn't quite right when her eyes failed to light up, "I would love that, yes. We need to talk first though….without the kids here."

He laughed nervously and tilted his head, "I uh…get the feeling you're about tell me something I don't want to hear."

She sighed and nodded, "I'm not even sure how to tell you this." All thoughts of allowing him to read the book were suddenly put to the back of her mind. This wasn't exactly how she had planned on starting this conversation.

He reached out to her and took her hands in his and looked her in the eyes with a serious expression on his face, "Elizabeth, you can always tell me anything. I don't ever want you to be afraid to talk to me when there's a problem. We've been through a lot just to get to the point we are at and you know I love you more than anything."

She looked up at him and he could see the distress in her eyes, "Nathan, Lucas came to see me earlier today." She could instantly feel his body stiffen at the mention of Lucas' name, "His mother said that they want me to come and promote my book. She has edited it and it is ready to be published. They want to unveil it in New York City and they want me to be there for it, but it would mean me having to leave Hope Valley for a whole month."

"Oh….uh…..wow," he didn't smile and she could see that he was wrestling with his emotions over being separated from one another for that long when they had only recently admitted their feelings for one another. "So when would this be?"

"We would leave in about 3 weeks when school let out so I wouldn't miss any school and I would be back before the new school year started."

He looked at her in confusion, shaking his head, "What do you mean we? You and Little Jack?"

He saw her quick intake of breath, "No…..I mean well yes, but…," she sighed heavily, "Lucas would be going too since his mother is involved."

He released her hands and swallowed hard, looking down at the floor, "Oh boy." She could see his brain actively spinning at the news, "Elizabeth, I'm not sure what you want me to think about all of this. It's a lot to process and I'll be honest, I feel like I just got punched in the stomach." She kept watching him as his eyes darted around the room, focusing on everything, but her. He finally threw his hands in the air in frustration and they quickly landed on his hips as is mouth opened up like he was going to say something, but he just stood there, closed his mouth and began clenching his jaw.

"Nathan," she began with a sympathetic tone.

"What did you….um…what did you tell him," he asked while shaking his head slightly with an agitated look on his face.

"I'm told him I had to talk to you first and that I wasn't sure that I could leave my life here for that long."

"So, you didn't give him an answer yet?"

"No, Nathan our lives are intertwined now, whatever I do affects you and vice versa. I would never say yes to something like this without talking to you first. You and Jack and Allie are my first priorities. I hurt you once before by going away with him and I have come to realize what a big mistake that was because I almost lost you over it and I don't want that to happen again. We make decisions like this one together."

He closed his eyes, tilted his head in a downward motion, pursed his lips and then slowly opened his eyes again. "Elizabeth, I would be lying if I said I was ok with this. I'm really torn because on one hand I know how hard you have worked for this and I want your dream more than anything to become a reality. On the other hand, I honestly, absolutely hate the idea of you going anywhere with Lucas and I can't accompany you because of my duties here."

She reached up and touched the side of his face with the palm of her hand, gently caressing his cheek, "Nathan, I love you and only you and nothing will ever change that, not even Lucas or a trip to New York City. If you really don't want me to go, then just say so and I won't go."

He reached up and grabbed her hand from his face and brought it around to give it a quick kiss. "Elizabeth, I know you love me. I don't doubt it at all, but it's not you that I don't trust. I just don't trust Lucas." He paused for a moment contemplating his next words. "This is a lot to process at one time and I'm kind of hungry right now. When does Lucas want to know your decision?"

"He said to think about it and let him know in the next few days because arrangements will need to be made if I decide to go."

He let out a sigh and ran his empty hand over his face and then shook his head quickly to clear it, "Ok, let's not worry about it for now." He halfway smiled at her in an attempt to lighten the mood, "I can't think on an empty stomach anyways. Let's get the kids and go get something to eat. We can discuss it more later. I really need time to think about this one, Elizabeth."

She nodded at him and they both headed for the door as he grabbed his hat off of the hook, but she suddenly stopped and turned to him, putting her hand on his chest, "Oh I almost forgot. Nathan, I want you to read the book. I think it's about time I shared it with you."

He smiled at her, a more genuine smile this time, "I would like that."

She smiled back at him, nodding "good." He then placed his hand on the small of her back and escorted her out of his office and up the street to the row houses to retrieve the kids before heading to the café for dinner.

To Be Continued…..