Hope everyone is enjoying the story so far, I know that the last chapter was short, but it was the prologue. Anyway, here is a nice 3k+ chapter for you to enjoy!

Chapter 1

Sadie groaned as she felt the morning sun shining on her face through the thin glass window of the small cabin she had been sleeping in, heralding the arrival of yet another day. Growling in her throat because what little sleep she had been having had been interrupted, she rolled over and placed the pillow on top of her head. She wasn't about to get up, wasn't planning on getting up at all. She didn't want to have to face another day, and goodness only knew how many more she would be having, stuck in a ridiculous gang. Granted, they had been nice to her, but still, what did she have to live for? Everything that had meant anything to her was gone. What motivation did she have to get her moving? The only thing that she had really ever cared about and loved was now lying six foot under, pushing up the daisies because of some gang that decided to take their ranch from them. It wasn't fair, it just wasn't fair. Stifling a cry, she wished that she had died with him, then she wouldn't be here now, working with a bunch of outlaws. She and Jake had been happy together, living on their ranch until the events of that horrible day. Even in her dreams she kept reliving it, sleep bringing back horrible nightmares of what had taken place. It wasn't fair, he shouldn't have been killed. He was a good man. He should have still been alive, they should have been starting a family of their own, but now instead she was left with a huge emptiness that had quickly turned into hate and anger. Even though it had already been over a month since her husband had died and she had lost everything, then been rescued from his killars by the people she was now with, the pain she was experiencing was as raw as it had been the day Jake had died.

Hearing Mary-Beth next to her stirring from her quiet sobs, she tried harder to keep them in, forcing herself to swallow back her emotions. If she was going to be tough and fight it through, she couldn't afford to show weakness, when she was trying to do the very opposite. Being strong and trying not to let it get to her. She had to be strong, to be brave, feeling that if she didn't she would be kicked out of the gang she had been accepted into. She had found out in the time she had already spent with them was that she constantly had to prove herself, to prove that she belonged. Heck, they didn't even trust her enough to let her set foot outside the place they had taken over as their camp, that dog Micha still saying that she was against them and that they shouldn't trust her. Already she was starting to hate him, but he seemed to have an influence on the others, and they had decided to keep their distance till they could see what side she was on. Having been stuck in the same place for a month so far, hating everyday the restrictions they had placed on her, she swore that if she had to spend another day in the stuffy cabin she would go crazy.

'Mrs. Adler , are you alright?' Mary-Beth asked as she propped herself up on her elbow. Receiving no reply, she scooted over from her side of the tent and placed her hand on Sadie's shoulder, feeling the woman flinch at her touch. 'Are you okay?'

'Yeh, just fine.' Sadie snapped back, then realised how harsh her tone sounded. Pulling the pillow off her head, she punched it hard, taking her anger out on it rather than her cabin mate. She was just frustrated, so tired of it all. The pain, the anger, the feeling of being worthless and not belonging. 'But I won't be if I'm stuck in this stupid camp for one more day. I'm so sick of it, so flipp'n sick of being watched like a hawk, not being able to do anything because no one trusts me. I'm just so SICK OF IT!' She growled, punching the pillow so hard that it burst. Growling again as soft duck feather down floated back the the floor of the cabin, she hit it one last time. "I don't belong here, I don't have any place anywhere. I'm better off dead."

"No, you are not." She replied with force. "Sadie, you've had a terrible loss, and I understand that your having a hard time, but don't think that."

"Well, I can't help it. I can't do anything without Van Dar Linde or one of the looking over my shoulder, heck, I can't even set foot outside the camp so I can go for a walk and have time to myself. Even though I'm grateful that they took me in and all, I can't help but feel like I'm being suffocated."

'I know how you feel.' Mary-Beth snorted. 'Ever since that run in with the O'Driscolls Dutch won't let any of us go anywhere.' She saw the anger flash in Sadie's eyes at their mention and cringed. The other woman was already mad, and an angry Sadie was something not to be messed with, her as the other gang members had already found out that fact. The only ones who seemed unfazed by Sadie's outbursts were Arthur and Dutch, but the rest of them were slightly scared of her. She could be fine one moment, then a sobbing mess the second or an angry terror like she was starting to drift into this very minute. Who could blame her for her behaviour though, with all she had been through? 'Sorry Mrs. Adler, I shouldn't have said that.'

'What's done, is done.' She replied through gritted teeth, then threw her covers aside and got up. Quickly she made her bed and cleaned up the feathers from the busted pillow without another word to Mary-Beth, then headed out into the cool morning air. A thick, mushy layer of snow was still on the ground, the cold winter going through a short heatwave that was melting most of the ice and snow, leaving the ground a wet, boggy mess. Sighing, she was glad at least to see that the weather was being a little kinder then it had been for the past month. Looking around in the dawn darkness, she could hear the soft whispers of the other people as the gang began to wake for another day, the sun just barely beginning to shine through the thick trees of the forest they were staying in. Letting her eyes adjust to the dim light, she saw the horses standing together in a small group, quietly eating the what grass they could find around them, without a care in the world. The men had brought them out of the barns the day before so they could try to eat what little grass their was, to save the food they did have for later. The jingle of their halters, and the tweets of the small sparrows pecking around them gave everything the feeling of calmness, but Sadie could feel a storm brewing inside her.

Closing her eyes as she felt her sadness burning up inside her, she began to concentrate on her breathing to try and calm the waves of sorrow she would experience every time she thought of her husband, and his death. The monsters that had murdered him had made her watch helplessly as they killed him before her very eyes, and had laughed as they did so. She could still hear the blood curdling screams she had made, trying to get away from them so that she could rescue her husband, but there had been nothing she could do. God dammit, she hated those men, hated them with a fierceness she had never thought she would be capable of. It was a rage that would overtake her every time she thought of it, and the only thing that would calm her was the promise she had made to herself. That one day she would make them pay for what they had done and taken from her.

Arthur had seen Sadie leave her cabin and had been watching her from where he was sitting beside the fire. As he continued to keep an eye on her he threw the remainder of his coffee onto the ground and got up. Quietly, he approached her so that he didn't scare her. 'Little early for you to be up, isn't it?' He said gently as he walked closer, to let her know of his presence so that she didn't swing out at him in fear again. He already had one black eye from her, and even though he knew it was what had happened to her that made her so jumpy, he didn't want another one anytime soon. 'I mightn't know you well, but normally your still snoring up a storm at this time.'

Sadie heard him coming and momentarily took her gaze off the horses.'Couldn't sleep.' She turned away from him, looking back at the herd. 'And I don't want to talk about it.'

'Alright, we don't have to.' He knew what she was struggling with, but also knew that she wouldn't vocalize it, let alone to him. In time though, he hoped that she would start to open up, to deal with what was tearing her apart, but he could guess that healing for her wouldn't happen until she had taken out her revenge on the men who had killed her husband.'Nice morning isn't it?'

'Yeh, I guess so.'

Arthur stood in awkward silence as Sadie stood staring at the horses, then finally spoke up again. "Mrs. Adler, I know that you hate having to be here, but you don't have much of a choice. However, I have been talking to Dutch about letting you have some line, now that you've been here for a little while, and he's agreed to let you have some slack."

"Well, hallelujah." She snorted, slightly exasperated that it had taken so long. Seriously, what did she have to do to prove that she was with them? It was like they still thought she was on the side of the people that had killed her husband. "Took him long enough."

Arthur chuckled a little, then quickly brushed it off as a cough when he saw the way she was glaring at him. He could see the sadness in her eyes, the pain, but he could also see the anger and hate she held trapped inside herself. "I know it's not worth much, but Mrs. Adler, I do trust you." He watched as her eyes flickered a little, and her face expressed her surprise at her admission. "I think you deserve a chance, a chance to at least prove you have what it takes to stay here. How would you like to take a ride with Dutch and I later today?'

At the instigation of being allowed to leave camp, but with the mention of proving herself to stay, Sadie turned to him and looked up cautiously. 'And what exactly does it entail?'

'Oh, nothing dangerous." He quickly assured her. "It's just a social call to a ranch near here. Charles and Hosea came across it a couple of days back, but there was no one there at the time. As you know, hunting around here is a little scarce at the moment, so Dutch was hoping to buy a couple of steers if the owners have returned to do us till it picks up again. I thought you could do with a little change of scenery.'

"Yes, I could, but I don't want you to take me along out of pity." She still had a sense of pride, even though most if it was already in shreds and she was desperately trying to cling onto the last remaining pieces. 'I don't want people feeling sorry for me.'

"I assure you, , that that's not the case."

'Fine then. I'd be glad too." She could feel herself getting emotional from what he had said about her getting a chance, and didn't want to blow it by showing it. 'Now beat it, I want to be alone.'

'Alright, alight.' He put his hands up in surrender. Getting her cranky was something he wished to avoid, but he could tell it was only from the walls she was placing around herself so that she didn't get hurt. Although, it would harm her more then help her in the long run.. 'No need to get so snappy. Pick a horse from the bunch and get acquainted with it. These horses here don't have set riders, so whichever one you pick will be yours to look after. You know where we keep the tack, so find something that will fit it and be ready. We'll be leaving in a couple of hours.'

Sadie nodded as her face returned back to normal with her emotions in check, glad to hear that she was going to be doing something other then nothing for a change. Even if it was just a matter of going to a ranch with them to buy cattle. 'Alright. I'll be ready.' She replied as he walked away, then called after him. "Wait, Mr. Morgan,'

He stopped and turned back to her. 'Yes?'

'Thanks.' She gave him a tensy smile. 'For trusting me and giving me a chance to prove that I belong. I know that I ain't the easiest person to get along with, but I am trying really hard to not be a burden on the rest of you all. I promise you though, you won't regret convincing Mr. Van Dar Linde to let me in, I'll try to do my fair share to earn my keep.'

"I know you will." Arthur nodded, thinking of something to try and encourage her. 'I know you won't let us down.'

Sadie turned back to the horses after he had left, then proceeded to walk over closer to the herd to get a better look at them in the early morning light. Glancing over each of them with an experienced eye, she began to search for the horse she would call hers. Slowly she walked among them, checking each one over for the qualities she desired in a good horse. Sound legs, deep girth, intelligent head, bright eyes, then mentally marking off each one that didn't fit the bill. It took her a little while, and by the time she had narrowed it down nearly all the camp was up and going around their business, while the smell of breakfast cooking filled the air. Finally she was left with just three horses to choose from. A stocky tri-colored paint gelding who obviously had some mustang blood in him, a pure white mare that she guessed was some type of warmblood and a tall chestnut thoroughbred stallion.

Surprisingly enough, as she looked over the horses, she had began to relax and enjoy herself. Horses were the one thing she knew well, and they always put her in a good mood whenever she was around them. Whenever she had been worried or upset about something, it had been her horses she had turned to, and now, she was doing the same thing again. Walking up slowly to the stallion, she gave him a pat on the neck as he snorted then stood and sniffed her cautiously. "There's a good boy." The stallion snorted again as she reached down and grabbed his picket line, untying the rope as the stallion began to dance in place while shaking his head about. 'Easy boy, easy.' She soothed as she patted him again, getting him to calm down. One thing was certain, he had plenty of spirit, that was for sure. She liked her horses having spirit, but also knew that they could be quite the handful if the mood took them. 'Now, let's see about us being friends, hey?' Talking gently to him, slowly she led him away from the other horses and over to the supply wagon as the gang sat down to eat breakfast.

"Mrs. Adler, are you going to join us?" Susan asked as she began to dish up everyone's portions at the fire her and the cook had prepared at, deciding to have breakfast outside since the weather was being a bit kinder. "You missed dinner last night."

"I'll be along soon." She replied as she led the horse around them, feeling a little more optimistic then she had felt in a long time. It had to be the fact that the horses and Arthur's news had put her in a better mood, she still was morning her husband's death. "But you had better save me some please." Tying the stallion to the hitching post next to the wagon, she found a brush and started to give him a thorough grooming, heavens knew he needed it.

'Found yourself a horse I see.' Dutch interrupted her thoughts as he strood over to inspect the mount the woman had chosen, having already already eaten his portion of the food. 'Good choice. You have an eye for horses.'

'That's not the only thing I have an eye for, Dutch Van Dar Linde.' She stopped currying the stallion's coat and turned to him. 'I know you think me weak and a crybaby, but I want those pigs who killed my husband dead, and if I see any of them, they're going straight to Hell. They're going to pay for what they did to me.'

'I agree, Mrs. Adler.' He stepped closer and placed his hand on the horses withers. 'And I have my own vengeance to take out on Colm O'Driscoll, but all in good time. There is a time for all that, and it hasn't come yet. We will avenge your husband's death, but not now. Our main goal is focus at the moment is to find food, and keep everyone alive. Our quarrel with them can wait.'

'But-'

He cut her off. 'I have spoken. Now is not yet the time.'