Disclaimer: All characters are owned by Cassandra Clare. The plot is my own.

FYI this might be a really tough chapter to read. Get out your tissues.

CPOV

"Ow Magnus, what the fuck! that hurts." Clary cringed away from the demon with a comb. "I would still like to have hair on my head when we arrive to the party!"

"Mamma bad words jar" her son scolded, from him position on her bed watching cartoons. Ah the swear jar, the jar that probably held more money than the contents of her bank account. Ok that was a GROSS exaggeration, but still at this rate the twins were scheduled to be millions by the ripe age of 6. You see the rule goes for ANYONE who comes in the house and swears. Say a bad word put a 20 in the jar for each bad word said.

The whole ordeal began when Gigi called her brother a fucking prick, I clever ordering of words she learned from her Aunty Izzy. While Clary was proud her daughter was able to use her new vocabulary appropriately, she wasn't too keen one the words being used. So, after a long conversation about good and bad words, a bad word was established. All adults who entered the house understood consequences of using bad words. Though most just took the hit to their wallet, resulting in quite a sum of money currently residing in the jar. It was probably time to make a bad word bank account for every time the jar got full.

"Don't be a baby" Magnus bopped her on the head with the comb." Beauty is pain and honestly I don't know how you deal with all this everyday" he gestured to her hair.

"Gently" she mumbles under her breath. Magnus had spent at least an hour curling Clary's hair to give larger, looser more "sex kitten" curls compared to her natural "siren" curly mane. Magnus's words not her. He brushed her hair into a sleek high ponytail leaving out tendrils of curls to frame her face.

"Well you didn't give me enough time to get you ready, so being gentle was not something I was concerned with." She hadn't wanted Magnus to get her ready. She was perfectly capable of dressing and doing her own hair and makeup. So, when Magnus showed up at her townhome three hours before the engagement party, she was shocked to say the least. "Your hair looks to die for. Time to move to makeup."

"Normally I would say that we need to glitter you up … but I think for this look we will do something a little more subtle. You gown is sparkly enough as it is, plus I would hate for you to steal all the attention away from the bride and it be my fault" he looked at her slyly.

After an additional forty-five minutes of no makeup makeup Magnus was done with her. "Its time my dear for you to look into the mirror at my masterpiece."

Clary stood slowly stretching, he muscles aching and her joints popping, she made a note to herself that she need to get a more comfortable vanity chair for her bathroom. One that could withstand hours of torture perhaps. Between Magnus and Izzy this was neither first nor the last time she would have someone come over to play human barbie. She walked to the full-length mirror in her walk-in closet and gasped at the creature reflected in the mirror.

Magnus was right she looked like a full-on sex kitten with her voluminous hair pulled into a ponytail. The light brown smoky eye, nude lips and rosy cheeks combined with the whisps of hair framing her face made her look mysterious. Thanks to the twins, Clary's body was curvaceous in her simmering floor length gold slip dress. The dangerously high slit exposed her creamy pale right leg adorned gold 5-inch Jimmy Choo's.

Clary was glad the chain she always wore was long, it allowed for her ring to sit between her breasts and remain unseen, even with an ample amount of cleavage being shown. She was going to see him for the first time in 5 years and she wasn't sure she was ready. To make it worse she couldn't go to the party with the man that for the last few years that always seemed to make everything more manageable. Seb had not been invited to the engagement party out of respect for Jace, while Kaelie had not been invited out of respect for Clary. Not to mention Izzy really didn't like Kaelie. Magnus was to be her date tonight.

She was brought out of thoughts by the sound of the doorbell. "You did a good job Mags. Thanks", she glanced at him as she left her room to answer the door. It was his turn to get himself ready and she had no intention on remaining in this room while that happened.

She already knew who was at the door, and his presence was just what she needed to calm her nerves. Clary descended three flights of stairs as quickly as her heels and gown would allow to keep him from waiting any longer than necessary. Opening the door, the man on the other side ogled at her, running his eyes up and down her body. Settling on her ample breasts.

"My eyes are up here Seb" she giggled.

He was holding two pizza boxes and wore a smirk that suggested his thoughts were anything but innocent. Sebastian was the exact opposite of Jace, where Jace was all light and gold Sebastian was dark and mysterious. He stood six foot one with wavy disheveled black hair. His eyes were almost onyx, the darkest brown Clary had every seen, holding hints of mischief. And his build, his build, let's just say it was blatantly obvious he took care of his body in all the right ways. Seb was probably the second most attractive man she had every laid her eyes on, after Jace that is.

She moved to the side and he carried the pizzas to the kitchen.

"Thanks again Seb for watching the kids"

"Clary, you never have to thank me for watching my niece and nephew. They are practically like my kids. Who knows maybe one day they will be my kids?" he smirked as he leaned against the kitchen counter

She knew he was joking. He knew she was nowhere near ready to contemplate marriage. Again. At least she knew he wasn't serious for now. It was obvious that Seb had intentions for their future. In fact, she was sure if she said yes, she was almost sure he would marry her tomorrow.

"You look gorgeous by the way. I have half a mind to not let you go looking as delicious as you do" he groaned.

Clary walked to Sebastian falling into his open arms, she wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her head against his chest. She felt safe like this, like nothing could hurt so long as remained wrapped in his arms. She had always felt this way around Seb, ever since he found his way into her life her freshman year of high school. After Jace left their bond was only strengthened.

"Seb, I wish you could come. I am so nervous to see Jace" she mumbled into his chest.

Clary and Jace had been best friends since she was eight and he was nine. Before Simon, Izzy or Seb. She knew his parents Stephan and Celine Herondale. She was there for him when he found out his dad cheated on his mom with one of her closest friends. She helped him come to terms with the notion that his parents' marriage might not survive.

She was there for him when they died. She was there for him when his only living relative, his grandmother, refused to take him in because he reminded her too much of her son. He would never admit how much it hurt him to be turned away by his own flesh and blood, but she could always see the pain in his eyes. She was there for him when his distant cousins the Lightwoods took him in.

She was the one that convinced him that the Lightwoods loved him, that they didn't take him in because they pitied the poor abandoned orphan. She showed him that they treated him like nothing less than a son, that they loved him just as much as they loved their own kids.

She was there for every acting gig he got and every rejection he received encouraging him that these things take time. He was her best friends and she was his.

Now though, now she had no idea who the man she loved for so long was anymore. The man she put her hope and faith into. The man who hid her heart for safe keeping and never told her where to find it when he left. When she finally did find it was shattered into pieces.

"Clary look at me" Sebastian gently pulled away lifting her chin up so she could look him in the eyes. "I've said it once and I'll say it again Fuck Jace. You have no reason to be nervous or sad, you did nothing wrong. He moved on; you're moving on. Sometimes love is but a fleeting moment not an eternity. I know that you are planning on telling him about the twins later, so let not worry about that until later." He looked from one eye to the other. " You are stronger than this. Have fun with your friends and come back home to me and the kids. I promise I will always be here." Then he pecked her on the lips.

Clearly there was no love lost between Jace and Seb. Seb resented Jace for how easily he could abandon the women he claimed to love. In turn abandoning his children also.

He was right about one thing; she was strong, and she would make it through this party unscathed. This wasn't about her own drama, but about a celebration of the love two of her friends shared.

"Uncle Seb!" Gigi ran into the room hugging his leg. "Mama said you gonna watch us while she's with Uncle Maggie. Is that tru?" she looked up at him batting her eyelashes.

"Yeah honey, we can do whatever you and your brother want. When mama's away the kids with play" he winked at Gigi.

"Biscuit we should be going, or we will be late" a very dapper looking Magnus entered the kitchen. "Seb looking delectable as usual, maybe later tonight you will finally score. Ow" Clary jabbed an elbow into Magnus's side.

"Uncle Seb what is scoring? I want to play with you and Mamma" Chris came into the kitchen looking at his Uncle.

Before Seb could make an innuendo, saturated statement Clary chimed in "Scoring is something adults do and when your older Mama will explain it further. Gigi and Chris be good for your uncle." She turned to leave the kitchen, not before calling over her shoulder "Seb, wipe that smirk off your face, I do believe you owe the bad word jar a 20."

It turned out by the end of the night he would owe the bad word jar no less than eight twenties.

~xXx~

Clary started to wonder why she had been so nervous about Iz and Si's engagement party for the last few weeks. Everything was going as planned, better than good, the party was great. But as we all know, all good thing must come to an end.

The engagement party was extravagant to say the least, hosting a little over a hundred guest. She should have known, nothing Izzy did was less than extravagant. If this is what the engagement party looked like, Clary could only imagine wedding would be like. She already knew over four hundred guests had were invited, which luckily included Seb.

The vibe of the party was very romantic, being late summer, Izzy made the decision to have the party be outside. The tables and dance floor were canopied by twinkle lights and surrounded by an opulent garden. Each of the rectangular tables were adorned with candles resting in crystal vases of varying heights.

After speaking with Izzy and Simon, telling them how beautiful the party looked, Clary and Magnus immediately went to find their table. Luckily for Clary her table was far away from Jace's. Though she was sad she wasn't sitting with Izzy and the others she understood. She was only family in the loosest of terms, being the mother to the twins. Even though she was to be in the wedding it was better for now that she keep her distance until she spoke with him.

She and Magnus sat with some of the Lightwood cousins as well as some of Simon's bandmates. Not that Simon's band was any good. He made most of his money from cyber security. They all kept up small talk until dinner arrived.

She forgot he was going to be here. Well not really, but she hadn't seen him all evening. That was until it was time for toasts. Almost every member of the Lightwood and Lewis family gave a speech. Telling a story about the happy couple and wishing them well, giving them advice on how to overcome the hard times.

Then it was Jace's turn. He was more handsome than she had remember, his playful charm could be felt before he even opened his mouth. Of course, he didn't see her there, she was sitting toward the back and he was looking at his sister. He wore a perfectly tailored navy suit, with his golden locks artfully disheveled. He made it seem like it didn't take the thirty minutes she knew it took to achieve that; I don't care look.

As he spoke, she was enthralled with the mere sound of his voice. His words wrapping around her like a comfortable blanket that was misplaced years ago. She could remember what he sounded like whispering in her, telling her how much a loved her.

"You know" he started running his hands through his hair. "For the life of me I can't figure out what Izzy see's in you" he started with a smirk directing his eyes to Simon. "I mean Izzy's type in high school was never dungeons and dragons' nerd. I was sure when she told me you too were a thing that she would quickly stomp on your heart with her six-inch Louboutin's, because in case anyone didn't know this about Isabelle Lightwood, she is a heart breaker." To this the whole room erupted in laughter. "But for whatever reason you make her happy and that's all that really matters to me. Izzy is the only sister I will ever know, she is my best friend, so don't fuck up. Because if you do ill make, you'll regret it, with my fists. Since I am moving back home, be prepared to see a lot more of me Simon Lewis, because Izzy will forever and always be my partner in crime. I'd wish you both luck in marriage, but I know you won't need. To Izzy and Simon" the room toasted.

Izzy stood hugging her brother, with a smile Clary hadn't seen on Izzy's face in a while. A smile that only Jace could bring out of her and Clary was happy to see her friend that happy again. Izzy and Simon began speaking and addressing the guests, when something that Jace said stuck out to Clary "Since I am moving back" moving back. She was officially freaking out he was moving back, why now? She wasn't ready. She wasn't ready to have to constantly face him and his fiancé. Clary was in a downward spiral of anguish internally, externally she simply looked zoned out.

Magnus gave her a weird look kicking her leg under the table. Blinking she realized the whole room had their attention directed at her and someone was handing her a microphone.

"Earth to Clary. Did you have anything you wanted to say?" Simon gently asked. He knew she didn't like to be put in the spotlight, but he also knew she would regret if she didn't make a speech for two of her best friend's engagement party.

Clary looked up towards Simon and Izzy's table and for the first-time all-night green met gold. Jace was looking straight at her, his eyes running through a myriad of emotion, most of which Clary couldn't decipher before his expression went blank. Magnus grabbed her hand reminding he she should be saying something. Breaking her gaze from Jace, she looked at Magnus silently thanking him.

She gazed up at Izzy and Simon holding hands, looking at her with concern and she knew that this moment was not about her. After clearing her throat, she began.

"Wow where do I start? How about I keep this one short and save the tearjerker for the wedding." She smiled at her friends and the party erupted in laughter. "You know it took Simon four years to really even hold a conversation with Izzy. You see we sat at the same lunch table all through middle school, a different one throughout high school and he never held a conversation with her. I swear he would just pretend to read his comic books and drool while watching her eat lunch. It was obvious to anyone with eyes that she thought he was cute, yet he never fathomed the notion that Isabelle Lightwood could be interested in him. It took him another two years, over a hundred pep talks and a little bit of liquid courage to finally ask her out. And too his astonishment she said yes. You two have been here for me though some of my darkest times and many of the bright spots too" she began to choke up. "You know someone told me recently that some loves are fleeting, while other last an eternity. And you two, I am pretty sure you have eternity love. You give me hope … you give me hope that I can have that too one day." By the end of her speech Clary had to look up at the stars to keep the tears at bay. "To Iz and Si" her voice cracked "may your love set the world ablaze."

Clary promised herself she would not cry, Seb was right she was stronger than this. She looked up at Iz and Si, smiling, letting them know without words that she was alright. She didn't look at him though, should couldn't, but she could feel Jace's gaze boring into her soul. Magnus gave her hand a squeeze and she sat back down.

~xXx~

Soon after the speeches ended the dance floor opened, with Simon and Izzy having the first dance. Somehow that is where Clary found herself besides Magnus.

The dance floor was crowded but she had a mission. She promised to introduce Magnus to Alec, and this seemed like the perfect time. For the first time all night he was nowhere near Jace, as a matter of fact she had no idea where Jace had disappeared to. She grabbed Magnus's hand pulling him through packed dance floor until she found a beautiful man with black hair and deep blue eyes.

"Alec" she tapped his shoulder and he turned around with a smile.

"Clary beautiful speech. How are the kids? It's been a while since I have had the chance to see them" Alec pulled her into a hug whispering in her ear.

"They are great, you know you're always welcome to come by and visit. They miss their Uncle Alec. Enough about them, I have someone I want you to meet. This is my friend that Izzy and I have been telling you about, Magnus Bane."

Magnus smirked hold out his had to Alec, as if to shake. The moment Alec reached his hand out Magnus grabbed it pressing a kiss to his knuckles. "It's a pleasure to meet you" Magnus purred at a bug-eyed Alec.

"P… p… pleasure to meet you too." For anyone who didn't know Alec you would think he was scared shitless and he was, but there was an obvious spark between the two men.

"I'll let you to talk, I need to check up on the kids" Clary whispered to Alec. She lied, there was nothing to check up on, she trusted Seb. She just needed an opportunity to let Magnus do his magic.

"So what is it you do Alexander?" she could hear Magnus questioning as she walked away with a smile on her face.

She spent the remainder of the evening dancing. She danced with Robert, Izzy, Simon and Max who she was sure grabbed her ass a few times. She ran into Maryse who told her how beautiful she looked and how wonderful her speech was. Though she hadn't seen Alec in an hour she knew he was left in good hands.

Clary was dancing with Gideon Lightwood when she felt his presence behind her. She always knew when he was around.

"May I have this dance?" Jace asked tapping her on the shoulder. Like a deer in headlights she just nodded blinking her eyes. She had hoped she could go the night avoiding him, but fate was never on her side. Little did she know her night would not end as joyfully as it began.

~xXx~

Jace POV

After the speeches, Jace headed to the bar. Seeing her brought out a whole slew of emotions he was not ready to deal with. Not to mention she looked stunning; her gold dress shimmered under the twinkle lights. Her hips were alluring, and she showed just the right amount of cleavage to have him wonder what kind of underwear she was wearing. And when he saw her leg fall out the slit, he wondered if she was wearing panties at all. When Max claimed she was sexy as hell, it wasn't an exaggeration. He could imagine what she would sound like in his bed purring in his ear like the sex kitten she resembled.

"Can I get a double shot of whiskey and a beer?" he asked the bartender. Within seconds he downed the shots asking for another as he sipped on his beer. He couldn't afford to think of her that way, she broke his heart. She had no reason to sound so broken when she gave that speech.

No, he hated her. You could still find someone attractive and still hate them. He wondered if their hate sex would be as mind blowing as he imagined. No, he had Kaeli, he was happy, he loved her. Kaeli made him happy, happier, happish. She was his fiancé for goodness sake, not his first fiancé but probably his last. No not probably most definitely, he hoped.

Clary ruined this, she ruined them. He remembered shortly after he moved to LA somehow Sebastian found him. Sebastian confirmed all of Jace's suspicions. He told Jace that he and Clary had been seeing each other intimately for a little over two months, which coincided with when she began distancing herself. He showed him screen shots of text messages they exchanged that were not strictly platonic. He told Jace that they were in love and she didn't know how to break the news to him. That visit is what triggered some of Jace's darkest years, that very night he got drunk and hooked up with some random girl at a bar. Unfortunately, that incident made front page news and so began his complicated relationship with the media.

Kaeli saved him from that life and he owed her his loyalty. He never told anyone about Sebastian's visit and he never heard from him again. But that could have been because of the two black eyes Jace left the man with.

"Dude tonight I am going to make my move" Jace hadn't noticed Max approach him. "You saw those knockers right? Oh, I cannot wait to have that ass in my hands." Jace's hand fisted by his side the more Max spoke. He threw back his second shot. "I wonder what it would feel like to pull on all that red hair. Bro tell me does the carpet match the drapes?" Max looked at him mischievously.

"I swear on the Angel Max, if you do not get the fuck away from me right now" Jace whispered angrily his ears turning red.

"OO yeah your right bro she is free. Catch ya later" his youngest brother sauntered away. He watched Max engage Clary in a dance "accidentally" grabbing her ass as promised.

That was essentially how the evening went for Jace, he drank watching Clary dance with person after person. She looked happy, but he could tell something was off. Her eyes didn't sparkle when she smiled or laughed. Maybe she was upset her boyfriend couldn't come, Jace brooded.

"Jace honey maybe you should go talk to her" his mother sat down beside him. "It's been years, you both have grown. You both have a lot to talk about. The way you're looking at her and her you I can tell there is still a lot of love there. She was your best friend. Talk to her. Maybe not a super deep conversation but something" Maryse gave him a sad smile.

Jace wasn't drunk. Atleast he thought he wasn't, but he was surprised none the less when he immediately agreed with him mother. Only he wanted to make her hurt as much as he was currently hurting.

"I think I will mom" he smiled; his eyes void of emotion. It was in that moment that Maryse knew she fucked up. But it was too late, he was already on his way.

~xXx~

He watched as Gideon Lightwood had his grubby hands dangerously close to Clary's ass. Giving the man a death glare, he tapped Clary's shoulder and asked, "may I have this dance?". His cousin immediately let go of the red head and walked away.

She nodded yes to him, blinker her beautiful emerald green doe eyes. The moment his hands touched he waist, there was an instant spark, the same spark they always had. She awkwardly placed her hands on his shoulders, and they swayed to the beat of the song that was playing. The two remained silent for a while just looking into each other's eyes. It was like they were the only two in the room.

He thought to himself "how could he still love her after all this time, after all she had done?" The answer was easy, at least is made since in his intoxicated mind, he didn't love her. Everyone knew there was a thin line between love and hate and he stopped straddling that fence years ago. He hated how beautiful she was still. He hated the way she looked into his eyes, as if trying to peer into his soul, he hated all the memories they had that she tarnished, he hated her. This realization was the spark that lit an inferno of rage he had kept at under wraps for far too long.

"You look good Clare-Bear" he used one of his pet names for her.

"Uh thank you, you look good too Jace." He knew he looked good he didn't need her to tell him that. "So, you are uh moving back" she questioned nervously.

"Yep, me and my Fiancé. You remember Kaeli right from high school." He saw her face change with the emphasis of the word's fiancé. "It crazy how things work huh she and I were together in high school and years later after being apart we found each other again. I love her you know she makes me so happy" he implored. He knew he was being cruel but at this point he didn't care.

Jace almost thought he saw a tear, but before he knew it all emotion was wiped off her face. Little did she know this was a game Jace knew all too well.

"Well that's great for you Jace, I am glad you are happy" she said robotically smiling. He knew her smile was fake.

"She is gorgeous, not like the usual girls I used to date. Up and coming model and intelligent to boot. I lucked out; I could have done so much worse."

"mhm" was all she responded looking away.

"I know that you are still apart my family's life, so I just want us all to get along"

"Me too Jace" she whispered.

"Don't tell anyone but Kaeli and I have been talking about starting a family after the wedding." he lied. He definitely had no intentions on kids anytime soon. "I have never been with a woman I thought I might want to start a family with until her".

And there it was the dam broke; he saw her carefully constructed facade fracture. At first, he wanted to sooth her, tell her he was sorry he didn't mean it, but then he remembered this was why he came over here. To make her hurt just as much as he did, if not worse. Goal accomplished he thought to himself darkly.

"That's great for you two" she replied her voice cracking. "I think … I think" she shuddered "I am going to head out now. It has been a long night. Nice seeing you" she dropped her hands from his shoulders and turned to walk away. But he wasn't done yet, he followed her through the crowd grabbing on to her arm until she turned around. Tears stained her face ruining her make up.

"Where are you going Clare-Bear, I thought you've wanted to talk to me for the last FIVE years" he stated maliciously, his eyes ablaze. "I am here right now say what you have to say."

"Why are you being so cruel?" she wept pulling her arm from his hand, hugging body as if it was the only means to keep herself together.

He shrugged, tilting his head to the side.

"I don't know why are you such a whore?" he asked coldly.

"I didn't cheat on you" she pleaded. "I would never do that to you." Ah once a liar always a liar he pondered to himself.

"Oh Clare Bear don't cry" he reached out to tenderly wipe away a few of her tears. "I don't understand why you continue to lie. I mean five years ago I learned you were both a two timing whore and a cold hearted bitch but I never thought you would turn out to be liar to. Tsk tsk. Have some dignity. At least be proud of your conquests like I am. Plus" he pouted "we never used to lie to one another."

She jerked away from his hand cupping her face. "I am not lying" she whimpered. Imploring him with her eyes, but he was too far gone to be reached.

"You see I would believe you if Seb didn't tell me all of your little dirty secrets. How many times he had you, where he had you" he tilted his head to the side "when he had you. He showed me your texts. We reminisced about how you have that spot right behind your ear that when sucked on makes you moan the most delicious sounds. Oh, he told me so much more, but I haven't the time to go down memory lane with you. So, when you tell me that it never happened, that you aren't the whore that fooled my family into believing her poor little sad story. Into pitying you. I just can't, but good try. You almost had me" he clapped in her face.

"What are you talking about, Seb would never do that because it's not true" she sobbed.

"So, your telling me the two of you aren't together?" he quirked his head to the other side and her face flashed with remorse.

"We are but"

"Finally, Clare Bear you do remember honesty. And to be honest with you I don't want to hear any more lies from a filthy slut. I promised myself when I watched my dad cheat on my mom, I would never let that happen to me. It's just so wild how history repeats itself through generations huh? Anyhoo it was nice seeing you around." He turned to leave but she stopped him.

He looked at her with questioning eyes as she reached behind her neck and removed the chain, he just realized she wore. A chain he was almost certain he had given her. She opened his hand and dropped her engagement ring in his palms.

"You know Jace, I was hoping that we could set aside our differences and move on. I was hoping you were still the same man I love … d. But you aren't and I am realizing you never truly loved me. You made that abundantly clear tonight. So, I hope you and Kaeli are really happy, I hope she gives you everything you deserve. Thank you so much for setting me free tonight, I hadn't realized how much I had been holding onto the memory of us" and with that she walked out of the party.

"Too far Jace, tonight you went too far" this was the first time he had ever seen shame in his mother's eyes. She was ashamed of him. He looked around him, and while the rest of the party hadn't seen his little outburst his direct family had. Simon was holding Izzy while she wept in his arms giving Jace an unforgiving death glare. His dad looked at him with disappointment, even Max looked a little degusted. Alec ran after Clary, but he was too late.

"You two were really engaged?" Izzy whispered.

"Yep" he responded with remorse. He was an ass he didn't mean to ruin her night. Shit he didn't even mean or remember half the shit he said to Clary. "I am so sorry Iz"

"Don't Jace, just don't. I can't be around you right now. Come on Simon lets go find Clary, make sure she is alright." She sighed holding up her hands walking away from him.

Well shit maybe he really did fuck up.

Once again tell me what you think

A