Some of the crew aren't sure if the blue bird perched on their captain is truly a man. The fire on it, the color of sunflowers and azaleas is unmistakably mythical though; and all of them have been briefed on the identity of Marco the Phoenix. The former first mate to the strongest man in the world, a pirate worth 5 billion berries –who, according to rumor, has been missing for almost a year. When Luffy returns to the ship from whatever detour he'd taken after beating Caesar Clown, he's carrying a blue chicken and he's crying.

His crew has seen him cry before, Luffy wears his heart on his sleeve. He laughs when he's happy and cries when he's sad, he yells when he's angry and is always quick to apologize. These tears are different. First of all, they're silent, almost as if the pain is too deep, and Luffy's not even truly aware that he's weeping. Luffy's carrying the bird with as much care as he's ever wielded in his limbs, trying to forget how it felt to hold his brother's cooling body in a war torn plaza. For a minute, as Marco choked and bled and screamed, Luffy thought he might've been too late. He thought he was going to hear the last of a life again: a desperate, delirious message that would haunt him for a long time.

Then the screw came out, and he'd been too surprised to move out of the way of the fire that blasted the darkened laboratory into an eerie blue for a moment. It was cool and ticklish to the touch. Where Pineapple Man had been, –for Luffy recognized his brother's nakama, even bleeding and broken– there is now a bird. It's a lot smaller than Luffy had seen in the war, but it made it easy to carry. He's concerned that the bird is still dying, but as the flames dwindle away to reveal the bird, there is no blood. When Luffy picks him up, the creature doesn't even stir. He heads for the Sunny.

"I need you to check this bird." He says, strolling straight towards Chopper. "It was dying." His nakama is a little surprised, and his brows furrowed in concern at Luffy, who's not quite done washing away his tears. There's no time for that, Luffy wants to make sure Marco is okay now. Besides, he's fine –his hurt is aching and tearing, but Luffy's used to it. He never wants it to fade, losing Ace isn't supposed to be easier, Luffy just needs to make sure it isn't ever in vain. He looks at the bird, at Marco, and knows this is a part of that.

"Luffy, are you okay?"

"I need you to check him out here, I don't think he's going to react well to waking up in the infirmary." The hollow pleading is ice in his veins, Luffy has seen this man toying with admirals and he'd been wrecked, wrecked. Luffy's seen pain, and he's intimately related to torture –but this, what has been taking place in Punk Hazard… it makes him fuckin sick and it takes all his willpower to stay still, to not squeeze Marco too tight.

Please, no more… no more doctors, please…

No man should ever have to beg. No one. Ever. Ever. Ever. And it's like Luffy's seeing something else or someone else, or maybe the injustices he's seen are all hitting him at once, because he's so fucking angry and frustrated and he just needs to rip this goddamn place to fucking goddamn little pieces, because if there's one thing he's learned is that not everyone deserves to live…

"Luffy?" The doctor voices the question again, his small form seems to shrink away from Luffy's gaze, but his eyes are concerned and curious. Luffy forcibly breathes out, relaxing his shoulders and rearranging Marco's weight in his arms.

"Chopper." Luffy sniffs, sitting down against the main mast and keeping Marco close to his chest. The Phoenix is deeply unconscious, but he's very warm and Luffy almost wants to cover him whole and keep him like this. It's strange, the absolute hollowness in his chest. It's like he's forgotten how to expand his lungs correctly, and he just… he can't catch a rhythm –not really. He takes sporadic, small gulps of air. "Please, just…"

"Okay." The little doctor nods, somehow understanding what his captain cannot put into words. Luffy can see Zoro off napping nearby, but he knows his first mate is awake. Nami's at the helm with Franky and the rest of the crew are all over the ship. Luffy's not sure how to explain what he's seen, it's not worth retelling really… The pain of torture… The pain of torture is unspeakable.

How do you explain the sinking realization that you can die any minute, and every second you don't there's unimaginable pain? That you'll never feel as small or powerless as when you're nothing but a whim, a maybe, fun for a minute. When Luffy was… when he was… At some point, it didn't matter where the boy's treasure was at all, it was all about making squirm.

Marco has squirmed, and Luffy knows there can be no explaining what it's like.

"Oh great, you found him, shorororo! I was sure he'd die without receiving his usual care!" Caesar's being carried on deck and Luffy goes very still. Law tries to catch his eyes, but Luffy's glare is frozen on the scientist. This man kidnapped, experimented and manipulated little kids. Marco, Marco lying in his own blood and entrails, missing vital parts of him and begging, begging the way no man should ever have to be AND HOW FUCKING DARE HE. "He's a unique specimen, but if you've removed the SCREW…" Luffy feels the head of the screw grinding against bone, as he'd desperately struggled to get a grip while it's slippery with blood and viscera. It'd made Luffy weak with every touch, killing Marco one agonizing moment at a time; desperation reigniting in his veins because not again, not again, please, please… "He's perfect for it, you know? It doesn't matter what you do, blue flames and then bam… you can start all over again, he's the end goal, the ultimate Devil Fruit… if we could mimic the effects with SMILE well…"

Something in Luffy snaps. He looks at Caesar, who suddenly becomes aware of Luffy's violent mood. Luffy feels like he's going to explode, he feels like he's on fire, like there's something dark and ugly trying to rip its way out of him, because in that moment of clarity, only one thing holds his attention: Caesar needs to die.

No more, please…

The wave of haki that leaves him is mostly unintentional and Caesar crumbles to his knees in one fell swoop. Looking up at him. Luffy wants to beat him up again, he wants to do it right this time; before he hadn't been angry enough, he hadn't known, Luffy hadn't seen… Law is suddenly blocking his vision.

"Straw Hat-ya?" His tone is deceptively gentle, but his hand is on his sword and he seems a little breathless. "Is that bird what you're trying to protect? You're going to hurt it if you don't get a grip." It slaps Luffy across the face and he takes a couple of steps back. (When did he even stand up?) He holds Marco up a little tighter, almost burying his face in the soft feathers, how can he be so warm? "Are you good?" Law checks, still keeping his sword in his hands; behind him, Luffy can feel Zoro readying for a confrontation -to support him even if he has no idea what's going on. Luffy breathes, he has to. They need Caesar, for Law's plan, afterwards… That's no good either. Luffy needs to breathe, he nods jerkily in response to Law's question.

"Keep him under deck." Luffy looks meaningfully at Marco, he's probably going to flip out if he sees Caesar on-board.

"Straw Hat-ya…" Law ventures carefully. "…is that Whitebeard's phoenix?"

"There's no Whitebeard anymore." Luffy whispers in response. Marineford had been a dark day for him, what had it been like for Marco? Luffy grits his teeth. "Keep him in the storage room on the belly of the ship, if I even hear him…" He looks meaningfully at Caesar, and he doesn't really mean it. But then he pictures Marco's mutilated hands, the red blood cascading down an empty eye socket and thinks he can definitely mean it. "He's dead. Plan or no plan."

Law doesn't look happy, but Luffy thinks the surgeon recognizes there is something lurking in this conversation that he's missing and doesn't agree nor disagree. If Luffy's impression of the other man is accurate, he's going to prod Luffy until his curiosity is satisfied. (But Luffy can be quite stubborn, and there's things that should never be said out loud.)

"Is Tony-ya going to treat him?" Luffy nods.

"I can give him a check-up too." He says. "If you want." Luffy nods again. He trusts Chopper blindly, but two doctors are better than one. (And he's trusted Traffy with his life too, hasn't he?)

"Don't stay outside, too many people. A place that's more comfortable." There's several places on the Sunny that fit the bill, but the ones closest to deck are probably the best options. Behind his eyelids there's Marco's naked form, swaying from the chains. Torn apart, soiled and cut open again and again. He'd been terrified at Luffy's appearance. Luffy had been terrified to see him alive. Again Luffy nods, Caesar doesn't make any more comments and avoids Luffy's gaze. It's better like that, because Luffy suddenly wants to ask, he wants to know what they did to Marco. But that stupid scientist wouldn't survive that conversation.

Luffy breathes again as he walks to the Observatory, hoping Marco's going to wake up soon. It can get really lonely in someone's head.

Thank you to surgeonlaw for the excitement :)

much love,

dee