Harvey sees Donna nodding in response to Nix' words. It surprises him a little, she'd been so quiet during the whole explanation that he wasn't sure she was keeping up. But apparently, she picked up more than he thought. He slowly slides off the bed, finding her eyes. His heart has been pounding in his chest ever since the two doctors came in and he felt his breathing speed up when Nix said he wanted to take Donna to surgery now. It's going too fast, he can barely wrap his head around it. But he tries to keep a straight face as he looks at Donna, because if he's this scared he can't even begin to imagine how she must feel.
"It's gonna be okay," Harvey softly says as he leans against the edge of the bed, his right hand reaching for Donna's face. He rests his palm against her warm cheek and strokes his thumb over her skin. She closes her eyes, enjoying the touch as she leans a little into it. "It's gonna be okay," he repeats, nodding a little as to put a little extra weight behind the words. "They're going to fix you and I'll be here when you wake up."
Donna sees the fear in Harvey's brown eyes. It's not a look she's seen often, but she's seen it before. His dark eyes conveying the fear of losing someone close to him. She'd already noticed the tension in his shoulders and his fast breathing. She places the palm of her hand against his chest, a small touch, but she knows it soothes him. His heart beats fast against his ribs, she can feel it under the tips of her fingers. He's still attempting to comfort her, while trying to hide his distress. She thinks it's sweet, and she lets him ramble on for a little while.
"Harvey," eventually Donna interrupts him. His attempt at reassurance is sweet, but she doesn't need it. She'd rather focus on his fear, but she's quite sure he wouldn't accept that right now. "Harvey," she says his name again, capturing all of his attention. Her hand slips behind his head and she pulls him in for a kiss, "I'll be fine," she whispers against his lips. She kisses him again and then leans back a little. Their foreheads are still touching, but now she can look into his eyes. She's still more worried about him than about herself; she'll be taken care of while he will be alone with his thoughts. "Go for a walk," she tells him, "get something to eat. Call Mike," she runs her fingers through the short, soft hairs at the nape of his neck, "don't go sitting around in the waiting room. Don't drive yourself crazy." She pulls him in for another kiss.
After that kiss, Harvey leans in once more. Then he pulls back, looking into her eyes. He feels slightly guilty because somehow the situation turned into her comforting him, but her eyes are as calm as her voice. The last thing he wants is her putting his needs above her own – again – but it truly seems like she's okay with it. "Good luck," he whispers, stealing another kiss, "I love you." She smiles at him – a tired, weak, and maybe also a little nervous smile – before letting her hand slide from his neck to his cheek and guiding his face towards hers for one last kiss, "I love you too."
As soon as Harvey lets Donna go, the two doctors wheel her bed out of the room. There's an urgency and speed in their movement that terrifies Harvey. He watches her go, frozen in his place. He stands in the empty room until a nurse walks in, "I'll take you to the waiting room." She offers. Harvey shakes his head, "I'll figure it out." He mutters, leaving the room. He doesn't remember where he came from, but it doesn't really matter. Donna suggested he'd go for a walk and while he's quite certain she didn't mean getting lost in the hospital, trying to figure out where the hell the exit is, it's a nice distraction.
The waiting room is eerily quiet when Harvey finally reaches it. He remembers the flurry of activity when he had to sit here earlier that evening, but now it's quiet. A glance at the clock tells him why; it's almost eleven. All the regular surgeries and minor emergencies have been taken care of. He sinks down in a chair, burying his face in his hands. Hours have passed since him and Donna left the firm, but he can't exactly say that things have gotten better since then. All the stern words and scary medical terms the doctors threw at them reverberate in his head. It makes his heartrate speed up again. He remembers the look in Donna's eyes when she told him not to drive himself crazy, she was serious about it because she knew he would. But he can't help it. He can't help being scared to death of her not coming out of the operating room.
Harvey's chest starts feeling tight on top of his already fast breathing and pounding heart. He recognizes the feeling; it's the start of a panic attack. He claws at his tie, but to no avail – he loosened it hours ago. He needs to distract himself, not think about Donna being in surgery. She told him to go for a walk or eat something or call Mike. He fumbles with his phone, choosing her last suggestion. It dawns on him that she suspected this would happen. She knows him better than he knows himself. And that's exactly why he can't lose her. The phone rings – once, twice, three times before Mike picks up. "Hey, Harvey, any news?"
"They've taken her to surgery," is all Harvey can choke out. Mike almost drops his phone, eyes widening. This situation keeps taking turns for the worse. "Hold on, I'll put you on speaker so Rachel can listen too, okay?" He asks when his wife taps on his arm after noticing his shocked expression. "I can't… I can't lose… Lose her…" They hear Harvey stutter through the phone and exchange a worried glance. "Harvey, what's going on?" Rachel asks, her voice slightly higher than usual. She looks at Mike, her own worry mirrored in his eyes. Worry that's as much about Harvey as it is about Donna. "Harvey," Mike tries when he doesn't respond to Rachels question, "where are you now?"
"The waiting room," Harvey responds, Mike's practical question is easy to answer, that is something he can do. "Okay," Mike sounds calm, "there's always a water dispenser in those places. Go grab yourself a drink of water. Take a breath." Harvey's body responds to the order, his legs walking him over to the water dispenser in the corner, shaking hands filling up a cup. He downs the water in a few big gulps, filling the cup again before sinking back into a chair. The tension in his body is still far from gone, but at least he feels like he can breathe again. "Thanks," he mutters as he leans back, rubbing his hand over his face.
"Can you tell us what's going on now?" Rachel sounds impatient and Harvey has to bite his tongue to hold back a snappy response. He reminds himself that his friends are also worried about Donna and that while he's at least been able to be with her, they have to sit and wait – something that he wouldn't even be able to do. They deserve an explanation after everything and he understands that Rachels impatience comes from fear and worry for her best friend.
"Her appendix burst," everything the doctors said is still in Harvey's head, but he can't seem to get himself to articulate a coherent story, "the infection spread through her whole abdomen… they're operating to try and clean it out now." He feels like his words make sense, but there's a long silence on the other end of the line and he starts doubting himself. "Shit…" Mike mumbles eventually. "Harvey, please explain further." Rachel asks. He bows his head, barely even knowing where to start. "Turns out she's been sick since Monday… that's probably when she got appendicitis. She thought she could power through it because… Well I don't goddamn know why she would think that and not talk to us!" He exclaims angrily.
"Hey, Harvey, calm down." Mike hears Harvey getting upset and tries to calm him down before he gets himself close to a panic attack again. At the same time he softly rubs Rachels back, seeing the fear in her eyes. "How did she get from appendicitis to this mess?" He asks, trying to distract Harvey from his anxiety by asking him a question. "Apparently," Harvey sighs, "when an appendix is infected, it can swell and burst. That's what happened. That's why she got so much sicker today. Because if it bursts, all the mess inside gets into the abdomen and can spread around. So she's basically got a huge infection in her body. And that's why she collapsed and why they're operating on her now."
Harvey breathes out, "but they don't know whether we came here in time or not." He admits, guilt gripping at his throat. If only he noticed earlier… "What do you mean… In time?" Rachel asks with a tiny voice. Harvey swallows, "if they don't manage to get the infection under control it can spread to her bloodstream and that… that's bad." "But they're operating on her now, that has to be in time, right?" Even Mike can't keep the worry out of his voice anymore. Harvey gets up, pacing the waiting room, "it has to be," he agrees, "and they started her on antibiotics and… it has to be okay. But… they said they had to wait and see. They're not sure until she comes out."
Tears burn in Harvey's eyes and he sinks down again, his legs suddenly not able to carry him anymore. "How was she?" Rachel asks softly. He thinks about the last moment before they wheeled her away, "she was in pain and exhausted… I've never seen her like that. But she was also… Donna," his mouth pulls up in a faint smile, "she managed to worry about me. And she seemed strangely calm, confident that it'd be okay." Although, now that he thinks about it, he isn't sure whether she really managed to grasp the severity of the situation; he didn't think she managed to process any of the words the doctors told them.
"We're coming down there right now," Mike decides. Harvey glances around the empty waiting room, "don't," he argues, "there's nothing you can do here. It'll be a few hours. You should try to sleep, LuvaCorp won't care about any of this." "Harvey," Rachel scoffs, "as if we care about that right now!" He drops his shoulders, "seriously guys. This case is big. And I'll be here, I'll call as soon as I hear something," he looks at the revolving doors, Donna's earlier words in his head, "I won't stay in this waiting room either. She told me to go for a walk. Maybe eat something. I think I'll do that."
Harvey only hears silence on the other end of the phone and knows Rachel and Mike are having a wordless discussion right now. He hopes they'll agree to stay home. Truthfully, he isn't in the mood to see anyone right now. He wants to be alone, find a moment to catch his breath and collect his thoughts. And he wants to be with Donna as soon as she wakes up. He wants to be alone with her, as egoistic as that may sound. "Fine," he hears Mike huff eventually, "but you have to promise to call," he pauses for a second, "when you hear anything, but also if you need us. Okay?" Harvey closes his eyes, slightly relieved, "sure. I'll call." He promises before hanging up.