A HTTYD CHRISTMAS VACATION
A/N: Who can resist a Christmas story-and the holidays do bring out the best and worst in people. It will be no surprise that my favourite Christmas film is National Lampoons Christmas Vacation and that may have influenced this story a little. Enjoy and Happy Christmas, Snoggletog and Holidays to you all!
Disclaimer: I don't own How To Train Your Dragon. Rights remain with Cressida Cowell and Dreamworks.
-o-
ONE: Excuses
It had long been Hiccup Haddock's dearest wish to host the Annual Christmas get-together. In his childhood, he could remember those fantastic days at his parents' house, his father loud and booming as he carved the turkey, the magnificent tree in the bay window, the sounds of friends and family filling the home with special memories. Even his mother's total lack of culinary skill-which relegated her to opening the cranberry sauce and setting the table-never put a damper because she was an expert mixologist and her seasonal punch inevitably made the day run more smoothly. Or perhaps those days at University, where he and his flatmates had made a feast from a small chicken, vast amounts of sausages and bacon, enough potatoes and sprouts to sink a battleship and Dagur's home brew which was enough to induce amnesia and a hangover that lasted to the New Year.
But life had moved on and things had changed. His mother was gone, felled by cancer and taken swiftly, despite her bravest struggles. His friends had drifted apart as well, busy with their own lives and families-as was Hiccup. Married to his childhood sweetheart, Astrid, and parents to two lively children-Zephyr and Nuffink-they had spent the last few years visiting her parents, hosting Stoick-Hiccup's father-and keeping the children out of mischief. Their tiny townhouse had been unsuited for any sort of proper gathering but in the Spring, they had moved to the old farmhouse on the edge of town and had set to work fixing it up. And finally, they had the space and children of the age where they could finally host Christmas.
So Hiccup and Astrid had sent out invitations-verbal and written-to invite their friends and their families, Astrid's parents, Hiccup's widowed father and his best friend and Hiccup's godfather, Gobber Belcher, to a good old fashioned family Christmas. Hiccup and Astrid had followed up and received positive responses so they had forged ahead with the preparations, ordering a large turkey, a yak roast for Boxing Day, a whole bag of potatoes, huge amounts of vegetables, a giant Christmas pudding and lots of mead, ale and wine. Astrid had taken the time to decorate the house from top to bottom, with the centrepiece being a beautifully adorned Norwegian spruce in the living room and decorations hanging from the high ceiling of the entrance hallway and stairs. The den was warm and cosy and the dining room with its huge oak table had been cleared to fit in all the chairs needed to accommodate everyone for the Christmas feast.
In the rest of the house, bedrooms had been swiftly decorated and the couple had invested in some new linens and towels to make sure everyone was treated to totally fresh sheets. Every blanket they owned had been laundered and were arrayed on the beds, ready for use. The children had agreed to share Fink's room for the duration because he had a bunk bed while Zephyr's room had a single and plenty of room for a camp bed as well. The attic playroom had also been converted into a bedroom for the holidays and was extremely cosy. And Hiccup had spent a precarious Sunday afternoon, balanced on a ladder and ably helped by his children as he put up the lights, decorating the house. Astrid had made sure the two small firs in the pots by the door were swathed in lights and that the lights were even.
"A little more to the left…no too far…no up about half an inch…no, that looks stupid…can you move it back again…?" Hiccup bowed his head and counted to twenty. Much as he loved Astrid, she was something of a tyrant when it came to decorations and she had made him move this particular light five times.
"Are you sure this particular light needs to be three microns to the left, Milady?" he called down. She frowned and folded her arms. "As opposed to two microns?"
"I want these to be perfect, Babe!" she called back.
"No one will notice!" he reminded her. "In fact, I doubt they'll even look up at them!" She glared.
"My Mom will," she huffed. "She notices everything. You know she used to have a ruler and measured the distance of every single light from the next one to make sure the display didn't look amateur…" Frowning, Hiccup swivelled on his step of the ladder.
"Really?"
"And she used to pick holes in the way I wrapped my presents," Astrid revealed. "Especially if the pattern didn't perfectly match. Or the join wasn't foursquare. Or I used a piece of sticky tape more than two centimetres long. Or…"
"So that's why all the presents are wrapped in gold or red foil paper," he realised, seeing his wife looking unhappy.
"Nothing I do is ever good enough for her," she sighed, her shoulders sagging. Hiccup couldn't get down the ladder quick enough, wrapping his arms around her and feeling her head rest on his shoulder.
"You are absolutely utterly perfect for me, Milady," he reminded her. "I have never seen such beautiful decorations-and that includes the ones at your Mom's. And you know why?" She looked up, big blue eyes meeting his emerald ones. "Because they're yours. And you've put them up with love to make sure our family has a lovely home for our first Christmas here. No one could ever compete with that."
"You sap," she murmured, tightening her arms around his lean shape. He smiled.
"Your sap," he confirmed. "Now shall we get the ladder inside?"
"Have you checked the bulbs?" she asked him anxiously.
"LED," he said smugly. "No bulbs, much less energy usage, multi colour options and multiple function options…"
"Steady and warm white," she warned him. "I am not having psychotic flashing in every colour under the sun…"
"Are you sure?" he teased her. "Because the kids were definitely voting for crazy flashing and chasing lights in red, green, blue, purple and gold…"
"Hiccup…" she said, giving him a glare and he chuckled.
"I surrender," he smiled, releasing her. "If you wrangle the kids, I'll start the hot chocolates."
"What did I do right to deserve you?" she asked as he carefully collapsed the ladder.
"You gave a scrawny freckly clumsy fishbone a chance," he told her happily. "And made me the happiest man in Berk."
oOo
"So when are you arriving?" Hiccup asked Freddy 'Fishlegs' Ingerman, his best friend and business partner. They ran a small software engineering practice from cosy offices in the centre of Berk town. Large, nerdy and fairly timid, Fishlegs had been Hiccup's best friend since middle school and the two had planned to work together since High School. Fishlegs had married Astrid's best friend, Heather Oswaldson, and the couples were very close.
There was a pause and Fishlegs's blue-green eyes guiltily looked down at his coffee, his thick fingers fiddling with his pencil.
"Um…" he said. Hiccup frowned and put his mug down, looking up and paying close attention to his friend. There was an unhappy look on Fishlegs's round face.
"Fish?" he asked. The husky man covered his face.
"We're not coming," he said suddenly, his voice distressed. Hiccup stiffened.
"Fish?" he asked warily. Fishlegs looked up, his kindly eyes filled with guilt.
"I know we promised to come over for Christmas but I think there was a mix up with Dagur and Mala…well, I think Dagur forgot to tell Mala so she booked a cabin for us over in Caldera Cay for a traditional Yule celebration," he gabbled. "So she and Dagur and little Dagny are going and they asked Heather and me and Heather said yes because she's never spent Christmas away from her brother and then she remembered that she'd said yes to Astrid and…oh dear…"
A heavy weight settled in Hiccup's stomach at the excuse and he tried to school his face to remain calm. After all, Fishlegs was his best friend and had stuck with him through everything-including the death of Hiccup's Mom from cancer-and he knew in his heart that this mix-up hurt Fishlegs as much as it did Hiccup. Under his husky exterior and bouts of wild enthusiasm, Fishlegs was a decent and honest man and he would miss seeing his godchildren Zephyr and Fink almost as much as they would miss seeing them. Despite their best efforts, Heather and Fishlegs hadn't been able to have a child so the couple were usually awesome godparents. But they would also want to see their niece…
"It's okay," Hiccup sighed, forcing himself to sound calm. It was a disappointment but what could he do? Heather wouldn't come without her brother, Dagur and Fishlegs wouldn't come without Heather. Another thought struck him. "Are Throk and Ruff coming with you?" Throk Stern was best friends with Mala, Dagur's wife and he always spent every major holiday with her since he lost his family early in life. Fishlegs looked guilty.
"I-I haven't asked but I guess so," he said quickly. "I mean, he wouldn't spend Christmas without Mala any more than Heather would be separated from Dagur."
"And as Ruff and the kids will go with him, I guess Tuff will as well?" Hiccup said slowly, imagining Astrid's expression at being told that more than half of her guests had decided to all go elsewhere…including her best friend. Fishlegs had the temerity to relax slightly, as if he was off the hook.
"Has Tuff ever gone anywhere without Ruff?" he asked. Throk's wife, Raquel 'Ruffnut' Thorston was inseparable from her twin brother Tommy (known to everyone as Tuffnut). They had never been apart even for a day and he had actually accompanied his sister on her honeymoon. No matter how he tried, Hiccup had never been able to get his head around the odd family dynamics but it seemed to work-for even though Throk was a stern and humourless man, he genuinely loved his wild Ruffnut and their twin children, Theodore and Letitia, and would do anything to make his wife happy.
"So I have to tell Astrid that Dagur, Mala, Dagny, you, Heather, Ruff, Tuff, Throk, Letty and Theo aren't coming," Hiccup said tonelessly. The other man caught an edge to his voice and cringed.
"Um…sorry?" he offered as Hiccup forced himself to nod. There was nothing he really could say because his mind was a mess at the moment.
"Okay," he murmured. "Right-maybe we should try to finish the software patch for the logistics programme for Sven's Viking Pizza before the holidays…"
The remainder of the afternoon was awkward, not least because Hiccup hadn't brought Fishlegs' and Heather's presents with him as he was expecting to see them in a couple of days but the other man produced a large bag containing all the family's gifts. It only reinforced Hiccup's sense of hurt and betrayal, even though he knew that Fishlegs hadn't caused the problem…but he had ample time to tell Hiccup and he had waited to the last minute. And honestly, what could Hiccup say? Fishlegs was his friend and business partner and having a blazing row would probably make Hiccup feel better but it wouldn't change what Fishlegs had done and would make moving forward more difficult. They would need to discuss things soon-but not now, while Hiccup was feeling disappointed and fairly angry and very let down.
"I'll give you your presents after Christmas," Hiccup explained, trying not to fee guilty and telling himself the reason why they would be late to their friends was nothing to do with him as they closed down the office and locked up. "Obviously I had no idea what was coming so I still assumed you were coming over for Christmas and would have given them to you on the day." Fishlegs gave a nervous laugh.
"Of course," he said and gave a broad smile. "Well, give our love to Astrid. And I'll see you after the holidays."
Hiccup watched him lumber off, his bulky sheepskin coat, green fluffy knitted scarf and mittens familiar. And he counted to twenty because he really wanted to throw something at him. Finally he contented himself with a parting shot.
"Not if Astrid sees you first," he muttered. "She's going to be mad."
oOo
"He told you when?" Astrid yelled. Hiccup winced as he hung up his coat, stowed his outdoor shoes and put away his messenger bag.
"Just after lunchtime," he explained.
"Just after lunchtime on the twenty third…when he and Heather are supposed to be coming over tomorrow," Astrid said shortly. "That's pretty shitty. We asked them a couple of months ago and checked three weeks ago. Why didn't they say anything?" Hiccup dumped his bag and wrapped her in a hug.
"I have no idea," he sighed. "And Dagur and Mala and Throk and Ruff haven't said a word…"
"That's even worse," Astrid commented bitterly. "Is that what our friends think of us? That we don't deserve an explanation? An apology? Even timely notification? I mean, I wouldn't have been happy but if they had said in time-when they booked the cabin-I guess we could have at least not bought all this food…" Hiccup face-palmed.
"Well, at least we have my family-and your parents," he sighed as Astrid pulled away from him.
"Are we such horrible people that none of our friends want to spend time with us?" she asked. He shook his head.
"I don't think so," he sighed. "Maybe we pushed them? But they should have said no. We would have understood." He gestured. "You've gone to so much trouble, Milady. I'm sorry." She looked up and pecked a kiss on his cheek.
"Hiccup-I know this meant so much to you," she sighed. "You always wanted to host the family Christmas and we have travelled every single year since High School to spend Christmas with someone else. For once, it would have been nice to repay their hospitality and have a special family Christmas at home."
"Maybe next year…" Hiccup murmured, pulling away and walking towards the kitchen. There was a definite slump to his shoulders and she knew he had felt hurt by the careless disregard of his friends. She trotted after him.
"There isn't going to be a next year," she said firmly. "I'm not going through all this unless our so-called friends have the decency to apologise and guarantee they will come when they promised." She folded her arms decisively. "And even then, they can wait. Why should they get another invitation when they let us down so badly?" Then she relented, seeing his face. "Babe-you are a really generous man and you forgive easily. I'm…not quite as generous…especially when someone hurts the people I care for. And I know this hurt you."
"I thought that Fish, at least, would have told me before," he murmured, sitting at the kitchen table and accepting the glass of wine that Astrid poured for him. "Maybe I was just too pushy and they didn't know how to tell me…"
"Really?" Astrid grumped, sitting opposite him. "They've never had any problems in telling you anything before. I think it's cowardly."
"What's cowardly?" The pair looked up to see the slender shape of their nine year old daughter, Zephyr. Very bright and inquisitive like her father, Zephyr had bright auburn hair and big blue eyes which she could use as appealingly as her mother.
"Uncle Fish, Auntie Heather, Uncle Dagur, Auntie Mala, Uncle Throk, Uncle Tuff and Aunt Ruff aren't coming," Astrid explained. "They told Dad today." Zephyr slid into the seat beside her father and looked up at him.
"But they're supposed to arrive tomorrow," she said and then frowned. "They knew before but they waited to tell us?" Hiccup nodded. "So Dagny, Letty and Theo aren't coming either?"
"I'm afraid not," Astrid said quietly. Zephyr sighed.
"I'll tell Fink he doesn't need to hide all his legos," she announced. "Theo always mucks them up. And Letty usually breaks at least one of my dolls." She shrugged. "I'm sorry. I know Dad really wanted a big Christmas…"
And then Hiccup's phone went off. He stared at it, seeing the face of his cousin, Simon 'Snotlout' Jorgensen displayed. With a shrug, he answered.
"Hi Snot-how are you?" he said. There was a pause.
"Hiya Hiccy," Snotlout announced brashly. "Got a bit of bad news. Dad has organised a surprise-they've got a chalet up in Winter Peak for them, sissy and I over Christmas. They only told me today. Apparently, Dad won the work lottery and he blew the lot on the holiday which is literally the nicest thing he's ever done for his family! I'm really sorry but I'd like to spend it with them. I mean-skiing, y'know? Spending all day on the slopes and coming back to a prepared Christmas dinner. You don't mind, do you?"
There was a long pause and Hiccup gave out a long sigh.
"Not at all, Snot-that sounds wonderful. Why would you want to stay in icy freezing Berk when you could go skilling on Winter Peak?"
"You sure?" Snotlout's voice was hopeful but Hiccup shook his head.
"You have an amazing time and send me a picture when you get there," he said. "Take care." And then he ended the call. He looked up. "Snot's not coming," he told them plainly. "His Dad has organised a surprise: they're all going to a chalet at Winter Peak for Christmas."
"Ah." Astrid's voice was unreadable as was her face. Hiccup drained his glass of wine.
"So it's just parents and Gobber," he said and walked to the fridge. He returned to the table with the bottle and refilled both the glasses.
"Okay," Astrid muttered through gritted teeth. "I can survive Christmas with my parents here. It will just be like those anger management exercises I had when I was a child…"
"Are you alright, Mom?" Zephyr asked in a concerned voice. Hiccup got up, poured his daughter a glass of milk and fished a cupcake out of the tin.
"Mom is a little stressed about your Gamma coming over," Hiccup explained as his daughter bit into the cake. "Gamma tends to point out every little fault and doesn't ever say well done." Zephyr frowned.
"You always say well done," she noted thoughtfully. "Even if Mom has to say we've done something wrong, she tells us what we did right and isn't mean." She looked over at her mother and something changed in her eyes. "Gamma is mean to Mom, isn't she?"
"Sometimes," Hiccup told her honestly. "I am telling you this because you're a big girl now. I'm not saying it to turn you against Gamma because she is still your Gamma. You should still love Gamma because everyone makes mistakes. Fink still loves you…"
"Ew." Zephyr's response was automatic and her father managed a grin.
"…even though both of you say 'ew' when you mention it…despite you burying him in the mud pit when he was five or leaving him in that trap you dug in the copse at the back of Grandpa's house…" Her eyes widened and then she sighed.
"Sorry."
"Zeph-everyone does mean things sometimes," Hiccup told her honestly. "But as we grow up, the most important thing is to remember not to be mean or cruel and to try to be kind to others if you can. And that's like seventeen times more important when it's family. Gamma kind of doesn't understand that sometimes so if you see her being mean to Mom, go up and give Mom a hug or call me and I will…hug Mom. Or something."
"It better be something," Astrid murmured, a small smile lifting her lips. Her azure eyes almost glowed with pride. "You, sir, are a fine example of a father." Zephyr chewed her cupcake thoughtfully and considered what she had been told.
"Can't I just tell Gamma she's being mean?" she asked. Astrid winced.
"You could-but then Gamma would probably shout and be mean to you-and I never want that to happen," she said. "I can handle Gamma. And Dad certainly can."
"Or something," Hiccup murmured and finished the bottle of wine.
oOo
Christmas Eve dawned bright and cold and Astrid volunteered to go into town early to pick up the last couple of items. A storm was forecast for later and on Christmas Day so she wanted to be prepared, just in case. Zephyr and Fink both insisted on going with her, possibly hoping to see the decorations in Berk one last time before Santa visited. That was fine with Hiccup, who wanted to check the wood, oil and gas stores since he was concerned that they were a little isolated. They had a generator with enough fuel to run for five days and plenty of wood for all the fires and the range so they would remain warm and fed but the generator would only light the kitchen and keep the fridge and freezers running.
"Could you pick up a few more candles, Milady?" Hiccup called as he headed for the door, wrapped up warmly. She stopped, looking arresting in her white snow jacket, pale blue woolly hat, scarf and mittens and brown snow boots. The kids were dressed in warm brown snow jackets with knitted hats, scarves and sheepskin mittens. Both wore wellington boots.
"We've got over a hundred, Babe," she reminded him. "And all those scented candles my Mom thinks are cute gifts. And then there are the birthday candles…"
"Trust me-I have a bad feeling about this," Hiccup told her darkly. "A few candles more won't hurt." So she smiled.
"I'll bring back plenty," she grinned and left. So Hiccup sat back and sipped his coffee, chewing his list and sighing that half of the preparations he had made weren't necessary since most of their guests had cried off. But he dutifully got up, collected the post, watered the tree and tidied up. As he watched, Toothless the cat wandered in. A rescue cat, found half-mauled by a dog with a damaged tail, he was a small cat, jet black and very fluffy with big green eyes and an incredibly cute face. However, he was full of cattitude and was immensely protective of his family, since Hiccup had been the one to drive off the junk yard dog intent on killing kitten Toothless. There was a pause and then Toothless appeared on the kitchen table, pointedly sitting just beside Hiccup's mug of coffee and cleaning his face nonchalantly.
"Morning, bud," Hiccup murmured and gently stroked his head. "Emerged once the army's moved out, hmm?" The cat gave a tiny meow. "Yeah-well, the good news is that you are going to have more turkey than you imagine since most of the people we asked over have all called out on us. And no matter what Astrid says, it has to be my fault. I must have projected needy or 'Santazilla' or something to have scared them all off." He sighed. "I just wanted everyone to have a great time together…and I guess most of them will…just not with us." He leaned his elbows on the table and buried his face in his hands. "Am I really such a useless person that people who call themselves my friends don't even feel the need to be honest with me and tell me they aren't coming? That no one bothers to say sorry after accepting and calling out at the last minute?" He looked up and stroked the little cat. "At least I have you, Astrid and the kids. Unless you are considering jumping ship…?"
The cat gave him an offended look and jumped off the table, walking to the back door. Giving a wry chuckle, he scrambled up and walked to the door.
"Aha-so you are jumping ship!" he commented, opening the back door. A blast of frigid air washed over them and the cat cringed back, peering at the gloomy morning with big wet flakes of snow starting to fall. Delicately, he extended a paw and placed it on the snow that was piled by the back door. He froze and jumped back, shaking the paw in disgust. Casting Hiccup an accusing look, he walked pointedly to his little donut bed by the range and curled up, closing his eyes and burying his nose in his fluffy tail as Hiccup closed and locked the door. Absently, Hiccup bent down as he passed and gently tousled his ears. "Thanks, bud," he murmured. "You always listen."
He had barely sat back down when his phone rang and he stared at the smiling image of his father on the screen. A huge mountain of a man with greying flaming red hair, an enormous braided beard that a badger could easily get lost in and sharp grey-green eyes, Stoick was the opposite of his lean and lanky son but he was a good father.
"Hey Dad!" he answered.
"SON!" Stoick boomed. Hiccup winced. Everything his father did was big, loud and brash. The former mayor of Berk, Stoick Haddock was well known and liked and though busy, he had always made time for his son. The two had become closer since Valka, Hiccup's Mom, had died and Hiccup was looking forward to finally welcoming his Dad over for the holidays. "How are things?"
"Just making the last few preparations," Hiccup explained with a smile. "I need to get a few more logs in since it's just started snowing and I don't want anyone to be cold."
"Good, good…always wise to be prepared," Stock commented, his voice thoughtful.
"So when are you and Gobber coming up?" Hiccup asked him cheerfully. "Astrid's in town but I'm here all day…"
"Ah. That was the reason why I was calling, son," Stoick said and Hiccup sat down heavily, his stomach filled with lead.
"Dad?"
"Some of my pals from my army days have just arrived in town and they…and Gobber…want to have an impromptu reunion. I mean, I haven't seen then for over thirty years but they're a merry bunch and it would be good to catch up…"
"And they are only in town over Christmas," Hiccup said tonelessly. There was a pause.
"You're my son and Fink and Zephy are my grandchildren," Stoick said gravely. "I want to spend Christmas with you…"
"But this is a once in thirty years chance," Hiccup realised. There was another pause.
"I'm upsetting you," Stoick said softly. "And I won't ruin your Christmas. I'll let Gobber know I'm coming up. Better break out old Skullcrusher…looks like the roads are going to get bad quickly in this weather…"
"No, Dad," Hiccup said suddenly, wondering if he heard the wistfulness in the older man's voice. "These are friends you haven't seen since before I was born and Christmas is a time for family, friends and reunions. I can't stop you from catching up with your old friends-it wouldn't be fair."
"But you have worked so hard for this Christmas…" Stoick murmured. "And the kids…"
"Tell you what," Hiccup said quietly. "You make your way up here as soon as your reunion is over and come and see the kids. We're here and will be waiting."
"Son, I…" Hiccup smiled.
"I'll explain to the kids and we'll keep you some turkey…if Toothless doesn't eat it all…" he offered. "You have a great time and you can tell me all about it when you finally get here."
"Son, I…" Stoick repeated and then he audibly gulped. "I don't deserve you," he added. Hiccup chuckled.
"You always said that family was important and that we should always be here with one another," he reminded his father. "Say HI to Gobber for me. And Happy Christmas, Dad. Love you."
"Love you, son."
Hiccup stared at the phone and groaned. He looked over at the cat.
"Your portion of turkey just doubled," he warned the dozing feline.
By the time he had filled every log basket in every room and lit the fire in the living room, he was convinced he must have angered at least three of the Aesir. He was feeling pretty down but at least he had Astrid…and Astrid's parents were coming over. He gulped. They were the last people he would have invited up without other guests to dilute them but it seemed they were to be the family's only Christmas houseguests. He wondered if his wife would divorce him before or after they carved the turkey for that.
It was snowing hard by the time Astrid and the kids arrived back. Zeph and Fink were sent in with the bags while Astrid ensured the SUV was reversed into the garage to make it easier to get out despite the snow. Berk was a land of inclement weather-the hardy inhabitants often joked that it snowed for nine months of the year and hailed the other three, that their balmy winters would give you frostbite on your spleen and that they had an extra season-Devastating Winter-which was like Winter on Steroids. Fortunately, the farmhouse had been built for Berk weather and was cosy and warm, with fireplaces in every room as well as excellent insulation and super central heating. Hiccup had made sure his home was warm and safe and he was already warming milk for hot chocolates when his wife walked back in.
"It's chaos out there," she reported. "I saw several women get into punch-ups over the last bag of satsumas and there was almost a riot when Sven's convenience store ran out of Brussels sprouts. But I got that crusty loaf your Dad likes and cinnamon buns for the kids." Then she smiled and winked at Fink. A sturdy lad only a couple of inches shy of his sister with wild blond hair and bright green eyes, he lifted a heavy bag onto the table. "Thanks, Finky." Hiccup frowned.
"What is it?"
"Three hundred candles," Fink explained proudly. "Zeph and I gathered them while the women were rolling on the floor shouting naughty words about the lack of satsumas." He gave a gap-toothed grin. "No one noticed the lack of candles…"
Suddenly Hiccup sighed.
"I've got some bad news," he admitted, decanting the warm milk into the jug and beginning to whisk in the chocolate. "Grampy Stoick called. Some of his old friends have come over for a surprise visit and he and Gobber are going to catch up with them." He looked up at Astrid. "Old Army pals." She gave a slow nod, chewing her lip. Since losing his wife, he spoken often of his army days and the couple knew how much those memories meant to him. "He sends his love and apologies and says he'll be up as soon as they're gone."
Astrid nodded.
"I guess these things happen," she murmured. "I have some news as well. My Mom called. She and Dad aren't coming over. Apparently Fenrir isn't well and my cousin Ida has 'unexpectedly' come over for the holidays. As if." Her tone was scornful. "A sick dog and a cousin who must have been invited over instead of coming to stay with us? She could have just said she didn't want to come."
"But that wouldn't have been how your Mom works, would it?" Hiccup asked dryly. "She arranged to not be able to come without having to do the mildly unpleasant task of actually telling you she doesn't want to spend time with us."
"And your Dad?" Astrid snarked, unexpectedly stung at the criticism of her parents-even though it was far milder than anything she would have said herself.
"He was going to come and let Gobber go to the reunion without him," he replied, recognising her reply for what it was. "I talked him into going. After all, he and Gobber are almost inseparable since Mom died and he would regret not going. He hasn't seen these guys for about thirty years while he can see us literally the day after they go home."
"No one's coming, are they?" Zephyr said suddenly, her voice sad. Turning round in shock, Astrid lifted her daughter into her lap as she sat on a chair by the kitchen table.
"Oh honey-I am sorry," she said softly. Fink scrambled into the chair next to her and leaned against her. "I know Dad and I wanted to give you a big family Christmas at home for once. But sometimes, these things happen."
"And sometimes, they are just people being mean and selfish," the girl said in a hard voice. "They all said yes but when they got a better offer, they dropped us. That's mean. And I know Dad was upset because none of your friends even bothered to tell you until yesterday. Even Auntie Heather."
Astrid's face hardened and her mouth thinned.
"Yes-Auntie Heather and I are going to be having a long and rather loud chat about that after the holidays," she said in a furious voice. Three mugs of hot chocolate suddenly hit the table in front of them, whipped cream, grated chocolate and melted marshmallows all decorating the warm drink. The kids cheered and grabbed theirs while Hiccup sat next to his son and ruffled his already wild hair.
"I was wondering if I imagined asking them or just assumed they said they'd come," he explained wearily, sipping his own hot chocolate.
"You gave them all written invitations at Thanksgiving," Astrid reminded him and grabbed his phone, opening it and flicking through his voicemails. "Here…"
"Hi Brother! Just ringing to confirm me and Dagny and Mala-poos are really looking forward to coming up and seeing you this Christmas. Tell me if we need to bring anything over. See ya!"
"Dagur didn't seem to be ambiguous in any way, did he?" Astrid asked sharply and started another message This time, a female voice was talking.
"Hey Hiccy. Ruff here. Throkster, Tuff and the kids all say yes so I guess you'll be seeing us on Christmas Eve. Looking forward to not having to cook for these gannets for once. So see you then and good luck!"
"And Heather told me that she was looking forward to coming and was bringing Christmas toffee," Astrid added. "You didn't assume anything. You were badly let down…" Hiccup took a sip from his hot chocolate and then shook his head. He looked at his children, who were subdued and his wife who was looking fit to kill.
I did this. I raised expectations and sold this huge family Christmas idea and now they're disappointed. Helheim, I'm disappointed. But I'll be damned before I let my kids have their Christmas ruined just because people who should know better let us down. Everything else can be sorted out later…but this is for them. It was always for them. Maybe I just forgot that. But no more.
"No," he said calmly. "I planned a family Christmas and I have here all the people I care most for in the world. If our friends don't want to share that with us, that is their decision-and their loss. But we will have a cosy and happy and fun Christmas here without them." He shrugged. "Still going to have a massive turkey though because the only turkey we have is massive." He tickled his son. "Probably as big as you, sport. Better be careful when Mom is preparing it or she may try to fill you with sage and onion stuffing instead!"
Fink squirmed and giggled, resting back against his father.
"You're so silly, Dad," he sighed. "Mom always uses sausage meat, onion and lemon!"
"You wish," Astrid commented. "Last time I did it, I put frankfurters in by mistake…and lemon curd…"
"Bleurgh…"
"So no sad faces?" Hiccup checked. The boy turned and hugged him.
"Dad-you always make sure we have a fantastic time," he said cheerfully. "And make the best chocolate."
"Well, I learned from my Dad so one day, I'm teaching you," he promised. Zephyr pulled a face.
"You'd better teach me as well," she suggested. "Fink has inherited his cooking skills from Mom."
"What?" Hiccup gasped and stared at his son. Fink grinned.
"Sorry, Dad," he said unrepentantly.
"And moving swiftly on…" Hiccup said with a despairing look at his wife. Astrid gave a smug smile and mouthed 'that's my boy!'. "…howsabout I make us all baked potatoes with tuna, beans and cheese?" There were cheers.
"Dad's special tuna?" Zeph checked.
"Always," Hiccup assured her.
"And Mom won't be allowed to do anything?" Fink checked.
"I may be granted cheese grating duties," Astrid reassured him.
"I'll supervise you," Zephyr offered with a smile as Astrid burst out laughing.
"Yes, Madame,' she chuckled.
As the sun set and the afternoon wore on, they watched a Christmas film-Bilbo the Happy Elf, a perennial Berk favourite-and then they all made mince pies together. And then, after lighting the last part of the advent candle, they watched the Christingle service from St Hilda's Church in Berk Town. Hiccup and Astrid got out the Christingles that they had prepared from instructions on the internet so the children could take part from home.
"Okay…so the orange represents…" the pastor said on television.
"The world," the kids recited cheerfully.
"And the candle…"
"Baby Jesus, the Light of the World."
"Fink, please try not to set your sister on fire…or the sofa…"
"Aww….Mom…"
"And the four sweets…"
"THE FOUR HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALYPSE!" Fink yelled.
The room fell silent.
"Er…what?" Hiccup asked in shock as the pastor continued in the background, largely ignored. Fink nodded.
"Famine, War, Pestilence, Death," he said cheerfully. "We did them at school." That had Astrid staring at the boy.
"You did what?" she demanded. "You're six." Fink grinned.
"Well, we do Ragnarok in school," he protested. "And I'm seven in February. So I looked them up. It's pretty cool actually. Though I don't think they have winged horses like the Valkyries…" Both his parents face-palmed.
"How did we get onto the destruction of the Universe?" Hiccup asked, bewildered. His wife gestured to the children.
"The apparently innocent Christmas tradition of Christingle and…Zeph? Where's yours?" The girl looked up, the candle carefully placed on her plate, the sweets eaten and the rind of her orange lying in a big curl around the candle. She was chewing.
"Well, no one was paying attention so I ate mine," she said. "Mom-can we have fruit salad for pudding?"
"No, not boring at all," Hiccup murmured. "I think we may have some in the fridge. Astrid…can you put out that fire please?" Rolling her eyes, she swiftly doused the small fire by pouring Fink's water over the area and his Christingle. "Right-toasted marshmallows and chocolate digestives over the fire…and some fruit salad. Then we can see how far Santa is-I've got the NASA website bookmarked so we can track his progress." He paused to allow the shrieks to die down. "And then I think it's time for a round of Monopoly."
"I'm gonna bankrupt Dad," Zeph said smugly.
"I'm going to jail!" Fink announced cheerfully.
"Probably for arson," Astrid muttered. "Thor help me…"
But the evening passed in a flash with both Astrid and Hiccup bankrupted by merciless property tycoon Zephyr and the children very carefully prepared Santa's snacks: a mince pie, a small glass of mead and a beautifully peeled and washed carrot for Rudolf. Once they had prepared the treats, they were actually asking to go upstairs and soon the children were in bed. And though they were excited, the fact they had been busy all day meant that they were tired enough to fall asleep almost immediately, allowing their parents to collapse on the sofa in front of the fire. Carols were playing quietly through the television and for a moment, everything was warm and peaceful.
"Is it wrong to be relieved that everyone has called off?" Astrid murmured, resting her head on his shoulder. "I mean, looking after them as well as the kids would probably kill me…"
"For what it's worth, I actually agree," he sighed. "I know the kids will be up at stupid o'clock so maybe we have a little time in front of the fire before we can deal with Santa's snacks…" She snuggled against him.
"I take it I'm the reindeer?" Astrid teased him, her eyes closed.
"I can be Blitzen if you wish," he offered. "And you can have the wonderful mince pie that Zeph and Fink have totally overfilled. I mean, it's got a domed lid! I can put some squeezy cream on it to make it better if you want…"
"Mmm…that would be perfect, Babe," she murmured. He kissed the top of her head and gently moved her onto the cushions.
"I'll sort it out," he said gently, banking the fire. He walked off, stretching tiredly and returned about ten minutes later with a fork, the can of cream and a tea plate. Then he brought the mince pie over, with the little glass of mead and the carrot. Gently, he squeezed the cream on top and handed her the fork. She looked up sleepily.
"Let's share," she murmured and rested back against his shoulder as soon as he settled down. Staring into the flames, he took a bite of the carrot. She was drooling on his shirt and he moved his head slightly to kiss her hair. She smiled but continued sleeping as he sat back.
"Happy Christmas, Milady," he murmured.