Hiei expected his time in Kosetsu to crawl by slowly, but the truth was that as the festival grew closer, and he and Kurama spent more time together, the days just seemed like they couldn't last long enough. Hiei swore to himself early that he wasn't going to be around Kurama, but the truth was that in the short space of time they'd known each other, the two of them had become friends. How could they not? Kurama was kind, charming, nice-smelling…and certainly handsome. Maybe there wasn't any harm in just being near him, even if they could never be in a relationship.

And we couldn't, Hiei thought, not because there was anything wrong with Kurama, but because Hiei himself knew he could never be in a relationship. If he were to be in a relationship, he would have to admit the truth—not just to the world, but to himself as well. And even if that wasn't an issue, why would Kurama even want him to begin with? Hiei wasn't fooling himself. Kurama was way out of his league.

Thankfully, Hiei got to spend time with Kurama without ever seeming desperate, because Yukina seemed to want to invite him to everything she did with Hiei. Why she did this was beyond him, but he wasn't complaining. She invited him to help bake Christmas cookies for the festival a few days before it began, and Hiei thoroughly enjoyed himself.

Yukina and Kurama both were good cooks, apparently. Yukina baked her coconut dream bars, which Hiei absolutely loved, and Kurama had a recipe for chocolate kisses surrounded by dough, which they then rolled in powdered sugar.

"You've got some sugar on your nose, Hiei," said Kurama, playfully wiping it off with his finger. Hiei blushed, but he felt happy at the same time as he reached out for another warm cookie to roll in the sugar. Yukina glanced at them and smiled.

…

Finally, after about a weeks' worth of preparation, the first night of the Christmas Festival began. It was the lighting and decorating of the big Christmas tree in Town Square, and Kurama said it was the second most important event, just after the Christmas Ball.

Some ornaments belonged to the town; others were extras brought by townsfolk that they hadn't been able to fit on their own trees. (Yukina and Kuwabara had an entire box for this.) The town mayor climbed a ladder and placed the star at the very top of the tree, while everyone else clapped and cheered. Christmas music played from four big speakers as everyone got to stringing on the lights, followed by the ornaments. They shared more memories, and Hiei felt a strange sort of relief and calm. Now he didn't have to pretend he had grown up like a "normal" kid, and even if he didn't really accept himself, Kurama's opinion of him didn't seem to have worsened at all.

"I painted this one for Rui when I was six," said Yukina, taking a white ceramic ornament out of the box, sloppily painted green and red.

"You're a good artist," Hiei said with a grin as she hung it up.

Once the tree was decorated, the mayor called for silence.

"The tree is now decorated," he said joyfully. "Let the Christmas Festival begin!"

All the townsfolk cheered wildly. Hiei clapped, his gloves muffling the sound, and he couldn't help but smile when he was surrounded by all this happiness and Christmas spirit.

"Remember that over the course of the Christmas Festival, the less fortunate of those in Kosetsu and its surrounding towns should feel free to place a Christmas card in the branches of this great tree," the mayor continued, "and every citizen is encouraged to select a Christmas card and buy whatever is written inside."

There were no cards on the tree yet, but once there were, Hiei could tell from the look on his sister's face that she would be one of the first to select a card.

"And now…" The mayor's grin grew even wider. "As custom dictates, a newcomer or visitor in Kosetsu will be the one to light up the tree."

"Go on," Kurama whispered, giving Hiei a little tap on the shoulder. His heart thumped wildly in his chest as he approached the mayor, who, upon closer inspection, was holding something that looked a little like a garage door opener in his hand.

"Just press this button," the mayor explained, handing it over. "That lights up the tree. Everyone else, sing along with the music, as loud or as pretty as you know how. And if you don't know the words…hum a little, tap your feet, or…jeez, do something. Ready?"

The townsfolk started singing along with the instrumental music playing through the speakers. Despite being a Christmas newbie, Hiei still knew the song, and he hummed quietly along with it as he pressed the button. Suddenly the lights flicked on, lighting the whole Town Square up as bright as day. The singing was then accompanied by applause and cheering, as if this tree was the most beautiful thing they had ever seen.

Everyone's eyes were on Hiei as he handed the device back to the mayor and headed back to where his sister, Kuwabara, and Kurama were standing. He still felt a little embarrassed, but mostly he was pleased. Kosetsu might have been a cheesy small town, but folks truly were friendly. And as Kurama said, they really did know how to get people in the holiday spirit.

…

Part of Hiei's job on the Christmas Festival committee was to make sure the decorations were fully stocked, and when he got a text from Keiko saying that the table at the Christmas Ball looked a little bare, Yukina suggested that Hiei go to Kurama's shop and buy a few more flowers.

"Why can't Kuwabara do it?" said Hiei.

"Well, he's got to stay home and take care of me," she replied, smiling kindly. "Besides, I'm sure Kurama will be glad to see you."

"I don't know about that," Hiei grumbled, but he agreed to go nonetheless. Sure enough, when he arrived and took a look in the window, Kurama didn't look happy to see anyone—and it wasn't any mystery why. In the front display window, there was a big sign saying that everything was 50% off, and sales markers were on almost all of the tables. That couldn't mean anything good.

Hiei couldn't help but remember their first meeting as he made his way into the store. That was back before he knew about Kurama's store possibly going out of business and all the money he owed the bank, with a deadline of Christmas Day. If he had to put everything on sale, he must have realized that there was no other way he could make that deadline. Hiei couldn't help thinking that this could be solved if he could just invest in the company, but Kurama had already said he didn't want that.

"Good afternoon, Hiei," Kurama said, looking up as Hiei entered the shop. He was smiling—or trying to, anyway—but even he couldn't disguise the sadness in his voice. It made the Christmas tree lighting the previous night seem so fake and deceptive.

"Hi," said Hiei. "I was thinking I might pick up some last-minute flowers for the Christmas Ball."

"Thank you." Kurama turned around as if he was working on something, but he still looked like a man whose goose was cooked and he knew it. Hiei felt anger flare inside him when he thought of Yomi. All because the asshole had been rejected, he had to ruin Kurama's business? It really was pathetic.

"I can pay full price for them," Hiei offered. "I know everything's on sale, but—"

"But you've figured out what's going on?" Kurama shrugged and sighed. "It's not a done deal yet, Hiei. If I can just get the money to the bank before Christmas, everything will be fine."

"Well, not really," said Hiei. "You'll still be struggling."

"Really, Hiei, I can manage." Kurama still wore a forced smile, but Hiei recognized from his tone that it was time to drop the subject. "Now, what kind of bouquet do you want?"

"I like those," said Hiei, pointing to some purple flowers on display. "What do they represent?"

"Hope." Kurama gave another obviously fake smile. "They're irises. They represent hope."

"That's good." Hiei felt his cheeks flush. "Hope for a new tomorrow. I'll decorate the tables at the Christmas Ball with them."

"I'll put them in a bag for you," Kurama said tonelessly. Hiei would have been confused as to why he was so upset, if he hadn't known that this business meant more to Kurama than money. It was something he had built, something he'd worked for. And now, not only had one of his business partners died and the other left in a fit of bitter resentment, but now he was losing his livelihood entirely, and if he didn't get the bills in soon, he would have to file for bankruptcy.

"You're going to be okay, Kurama," said Hiei. "I'm sure you'll find a way to turn things around before your deadline."

"Thank you, Hiei," Kurama said, "but the truth is, I don't have a lot of business sense. The reason I was valuable to the company was because I was the one with the green thumb. I grew all the plants and made all the products. But there's no point in being able to make and grow things if you can't sell them. Kuronue was always the brains behind that."

"I guess you really loved Kuronue, huh?" said Hiei, running his fingers through the petals of some blood-red poppies on one of the tables. "It must have been hard when he died."

"Yes." Kurama's voice was quiet. "It was very hard. But as they say, it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. I'm still glad I met him."

There was silence for a moment. Hiei let go of the poppies once he realized he was getting close to mangling them.

"Kurama," he said softly, "how did you tell everyone?"

"Tell everyone what?" Kurama asked, looking up.

"It's no secret you're bi, especially since you were engaged to another man," said Hiei, swallowing hard. "How did you come out of the closet?"

"Oh." Kurama looked surprised. "Well, I suppose I never was in the closet to begin with. I decided to be open and honest about it. And to be honest, if anyone was displeased, it was probably the girls at my school, because they had just gotten a lot more competition. I got asked out by a lot more guys. They seemed happy." Kurama shrugged. "Everyone was open-minded about that sort of thing at my school."

Hiei turned his back to Kurama, feeling a horrible weight in his chest; he was staring at some beautiful purple Japanese bellflowers, but at the same time, he wasn't really seeing them.

"At the institution, when I was almost eleven," he said quietly, "there were these three boys. One was fourteen, the other two fifteen. All the other kids were afraid of them. And one day, when I was walking down the hallway…"

Hiei paused, waiting for Kurama to say something, but he didn't say anything at all.

"I walked past these two guys holding hands." Hiei swallowed again, uncomfortable with the racing of his heart. "Not in a platonic way. In a dating way. And at the same time, that gang I told you about came around the corner too, and saw them."

"What happened, Hiei?" Kurama's tone was deliberate now, measured.

"They…they got them."

"You mean, they got into a fight?"

"No, they beat the shit out of them," said Hiei. "I ran to get an adult, but they still had to go to the hospital. And it didn't end there. One of the guys came back, but the other didn't. The way I hear it, they did this thing to him with a broom…" Biting his lip, Hiei shut his eyes against the memories that were still so clear in his mind, the sound of the couple's cries for help as Hiei fled the scene to do what he could. "His body healed, but his mind didn't. So he ended it, a few months later. Those guys did get in trouble, but before they left, I wanted to teach them a lesson—and I did, even though I broke my arm in the process. Still…no beating could take back what they did."

Silence. Such silence. It seemed to echo around the room, snarling in Hiei's stomach. But when Kurama's gentle voice finally broke it, his words made Hiei's head jerk up in shock, his eyes widen in horror.

"Is that why you never told anyone, Hiei?"

Heart still pounding, Hiei turned to face Kurama once more. The look on the other man's face was indecipherable.

"Not really," said Hiei finally, running one shaking finger along a tub of aloe. "No guy would ever want to hold hands with me."

It was awful during the silences, but it seemed that they would not be filled. Instead, as Hiei stared at the hardwood floors underneath his feet, unable to believe what he'd just said, Kurama set down the bag of irises, walked around the counter to stand in front of Hiei—and held out his hand. Hiei looked up into Kurama's green eyes, at the determined expression, and then down again at the outstretched hand.

Do I dare…?

Hiei bit his lip, expecting Kurama to yank his hand away, but when he didn't, Hiei wordlessly stretched out his arm and grasped the smooth, warm hand in his own. And when he did…the calm, the safety, the relief, it all suddenly seemed to flood evenly throughout his body.

"Tell me, Hiei," Kurama said softly. "Does anyone know this? Have you told Yukina?"

"No." Hiei gulped. "No one knows."

"Well, I promise I won't tell a living soul." Kurama kept holding onto Hiei's hand, and Hiei didn't want him to let go. "But I think you should."

"I-I couldn't." Hiei looked down at the floor again. "What if…what if she doesn't, you know…"

"What if she doesn't support you?" Kurama finished. "Hiei, I don't think you have to worry about that. Your sister will love you no matter what. Besides, if she was homophobic, why would she be friends with someone who was openly bi?"

"True," said Hiei reluctantly. "But how am I supposed to tell her?"

"That's something only you can decide," Kurama told him. "And I'm not saying you have to do anything. But I don't think you're going to feel better until you're honest about who you are."

"I know," said Hiei. "But I'm just so nervous."

"Do you want me to be there with you?"

"No, thanks." Hiei would have liked that, but if Kurama was there, Yukina would think they were in an official relationship, when they weren't. "This is something I have to do myself."

"I understand." Kurama gave Hiei a gentle smile. "Now, let's see about those irises."

…

Hiei had trouble getting to sleep that night, as he spent hours wondering what he was going to tell Yukina and Kuwabara. Kurama was probably right that he would feel better if he told, but he just couldn't think of the right way to do it. When he finally did fall asleep, his dreams were strange, Kurama's voice and touch mixed in with the cries of victims of a terrible hate crime, with Hiei standing there trying to figure out what to do.

The following day was the snowman-building contest, along with a big snowball fight. It was a good distraction for Hiei, but it also made him nervous, because he was around Yukina all day and couldn't bring himself to broach the topic. He spent that time with Kurama, who (to Hiei's relief) acted as if their conversation yesterday had never happened. The snowball fight was fun, and little Yusuke Jr. won the snowman-building contest. First prize was a mini bag of small chocolate Santas. Keiko looked like the sort of mother who didn't normally allow sweets, but even she seemed to make an exception for Christmas.

When the sun began to set in the evening sky, Hiei caught Yukina about to turn to Kurama, most likely to invite him for dinner. But Hiei tugged gently on her sleeve before she could.

"What is it, Hiei?" she asked.

"Were you going to invite Kurama for dinner?"

"Why, yes, I was." Yukina looked bewildered. "Do you not want him there?"

"Well, normally I would, but tonight…" Hiei found he was biting his lip again. "Not tonight. I have something important I want to talk to you about."

"All right." Yukina nodded. "I won't ask him tonight."

Hiei could feel Yukina's eyes on him as a taxi took them home from Kosetsu Park. He felt antsy all throughout the time she and Kuwabara were preparing dinner, still debating over the right words to say. He'd already decided he would tell them at dinner tonight, but the thought of it was still just so stressful.

They sat down at the table. Hiei picked at his food anxiously.

"Hiei, what's wrong?" Yukina asked, setting down her fork. "You've been acting strange all day."

"Yeah," Kuwabara agreed through a mouthful of mashed potatoes.

"There's…there's something about me that you two don't know," Hiei said finally. "Something really important. I'd never told anyone before yesterday, when I told Kurama, even though I've known since I was about nine or ten years old. He said I should tell you, and I knew he was right."

"What is it?" Yukina looked more serious than Hiei had ever seen her.

"All right." Hiei realized he had been so deeply closeted that he had never said it out loud before now. "What I want to tell you is…I'm gay."

Kuwabara spewed a mouthful of potatoes halfway across the table. "You're WHAT?!"

"I said, I'm gay," Hiei said, feeling an eerie sort of calm as he looked over at Yukina. He expected her to have a reaction sort of like Kuwabara's, sans the spittake, but she seemed completely fine.

"That's okay, Hiei," she said, and it was Hiei's turn to be shocked when she smiled. "I kind of had a suspicion anyway."

"You…you did?"

"Well, at first I always thought you never had a girlfriend or even a date because you were simply a loner. But then, once you came to Kosetsu…" Amazingly, her eyes were filling with tears. "I saw the way you look at Kurama, and the way he looks at you. It was surprising to me at first, but I'm just happy you found someone you really love."

"Yukina…" Hiei couldn't help but give her a wry smile. "Is that why you've been inviting Kurama everywhere? Because you were trying to set us up?"

"Guilty as charged." Yukina blushed. "But I hope it worked."

"I think it might have," said Hiei. "And thanks for understanding. I was afraid you were going to be angry or upset about it."

"If you're in love, Hiei…" Yukina brushed away a tear. "I don't feel anything but complete and utter joy."