Chapter 34- A Random Fall
The broken core makes a high pitched squeal, and explosions can be heard coming up from inside.
"We'll talk about what 'hacking' means later." Cassandra grabs Missingno's collar and jumps out the broken window. They fall as the Voltron head blows up. Long pieces of metal fall past, just barely missing them.
"Please tell me you have a plan to save us!"
Missingno smiles. "As long as you have the hammer, we'll be fine. It has a parachute in it, just in case of situations like this.
Cassandra points up to the hammer flipping distantly into the air, propelled by the explosions. "There was no time."
"... We're dead."
Technically, you would have been dead in 3.5 seconds if you fell from 200 feet up, but this is a humor fanfic, so we do what we want.
They both scream as the ground rushes towards them.
… And then they stop. They bounce back up and down a few times before coming to a rest. Cassandra looks around to find that a giant web stopped their fall.
"Missingno, stop screaming."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHhey look, it's Koons."
Koons is standing on top of one of the pieces that fell past them. Several others are also sticking out of the ground, so Koons shot some webbing between them to make a net.
"Wait, is he a spider? I always thought he was a cocoon, but I guess that shows what I know."
"Um, how do we get down?"
Cassandra's hammer falls out of the sky and through the poles, shattering them. They fall again, this time Missingno landing on his face and Cassandra and Koons landing on top of him.
"Ow."
Cassandra checks out the harbor to find everything back to normal. The S.S. Anne is docked, and no remnants of the robot or explosion could be seen. Standing on the pier is a normal Rapidash, still covered in accessories, being cuddled by the Chairman.
"Oh, my precious Rappi! I'm so glad you had fun at the cruise party. Let's go home."
There's probably going to be people mad that we gave a Pokemon a gender even though there were none in gen 1.
"Yeah, but the way I see it, it's not like they just suddenly gained a gender. They had to have had genders all along, but it didn't really matter for a while."
Cassandra picks up her hammer and puts it in her bag. "So, what do we do now?"
"What do you mean?"
"We can't get to the next gym without learning Cut, right? So that means we have to go back through the S.S. Anne to get it."
Missingno's shoulders go limp. "But that sounds like wo~~~~~rk."
"Do you have any other way around it?"
Missingno slumps over to the tree, rips it out of the ground and chucks it into the ocean. "There. Are you happy?"
"Yes, but she isn't." Cassandra points to the officer, who is writing him a ticket.
"Oh, come on. Littering? You only ⅓ exist anyways."
The officer glares while handing him the ticket.
He grabs it and runs up to Cassandra. "Do we even have to fight Lt. Surge?"
"Of course. He is the next gym leader."
"But couldn't we move on first? Fight other people first, travel around, make a bunch of jokes, and come back to him after beating some other Gyms first."
"NO! THIS ONE HAS TO BE NOW!"
"..." Missingno and Koons stare at her.
"Uh… sorry. That was weird." She rubs her temples. "But can we fight him now? Please…"
"Yeah, sure. But can I do my 'thing'?"
She sighs. "Whatever."
Missingno slams the door open. "Hey-yo!"
Cassandra walks in after him. "Why do you always say that?"
He smiles. "Every good protagonist has a catchphrase."
Cassandra looks around the room. Lines of trash cans cover the entire room, with just enough space to squeeze by. Several trainers stand at the ready.
"... What is this?"
Missingno hands her a pamphlet titled 'So You Want To Figure Out What The Crap Lt. Surge Was Thinking When He Made His Gym?'.
She looks it over. "Wait, so we have to look through all these trash cans to find hidden switches to get to Surge, and if we don't find the 2nd one immediately after the first, we have to begin the search all over again?!"
"Strange how many puzzles you have to go through just to have your paranormal creatures fight other magical beasts."
Koons used Poison Sting!
Enemy Pikachu fainted!
"Wait, why are you fighting the other trainers?!"
"Why? Am I not supposed to."
"Of course not. Koons might accidentally level up."
Cassandra shakes her head before turning back to the fight.
"Fine. I'll just find the switch on my own." As he rummages through the trash cans, he pulls out handfuls of empty chip bags. "Who put their trash in the very important gym trash cans!"
"That was you!" Cassandra yells from across the room.
"Oh. I suck." He throws the bags to the side.
The officer taps her foot as she writes another ticket.
"Come on!"
He snatches the ticket, crumples it up and throws it in one of the trash cans.
"Alright, back to finding those switches."
"Already done." Cassandra stands at the back, in front of the open doors to the gym leader room.
Missingno grumbles as he follows her into the back room. There, they are met with a large blond man covered in camouflage combat gear. He leans against a trash can as he greets them.
"Hey kids! What are you're doing here?"
Cassandra raises an eyebrow. "What?"
"You won't live long in combat! That's for sure!"
Missingno puts a hand on his heart as he gasps. "What?"
"I tell you kids, electric Pokemon saved me during the war! They zapped my enemies into paralysis! The same as I'll do to you!" He jabs a finger at Koons.
Koons looks back at him. "What?"