Chapter 35- A Random American
Lt. Surge grins. "They call me the Lightning American."
Cassandra raises an eyebrow. "What is an 'American'?"
"There's no way he is actually American." Missingno holds out a bowl of greens towards Lt. Surge. "Want a salad?"
Lt. Surge shrinks back. "Ew, nasty. Got something better, like a cheeseburger… or like, 200 cheeseburgers?"
"... He is American!" Missingno tosses the salad over his shoulder. "Well, it was nice to meet you, but we must leave."
Cassandra grabs his collar. "After a gym battle, of course."
"R-right. That's what I meant."
Lt. Surge laughs. "How many badges do you have?"
"Two."
Missingno looks back at him. "Why do you guys keep asking that?"
"We are gym leaders. I have plenty of Pokemon, but it would be unfair if I used all my strong ones on any new trainers. Since you have two badges already…" He pulls out a set of three Pokeballs. "I'll use these guys."
"Oh. That makes a lot of sense. Not every trainer would start their journey in Pallet town."
And how do you explain the ever increasing levels of wild and trainer's Pokemon?
"Shhhh. It's starting."
Against Koons, Lt. Surge sends out a round Pokemon. It is exactly half red and half white, like a Pokeball.
Cassandra's eyes grow wide. "Oh, no. Voltorb. Please don't go boom."
"Don't worry, it is only level 21. It doesn't learn Selfdestruct until level 22."
"In that case, we can do this!"
Koons used Harden!
Lt. Surge watches as Koons uses Harden several times to max out his defense.
"Return, Voltorb. Go, Pikachu." He switches out to a small yellow Pokemon. It waddles around on stubby legs.
"Ha. Cute, little, fat, gen 1 Pikachu."
Cassandra raises an eyebrow. "Why did he switch out?"
Lt. Surge smiles. "Electric type moves are special attacks." He shrugs. "A high defense makes no difference."
Enemy Pikachu used Thundershock!
… A lot.
Koons fainted!
Missingno throws his hands in the air. "And it's over. I guess you'll just have to try again later."
Cassandra shoves Missingno forward. "I guess you're up next."
"What?!"
"You said you're a Pokemon… ish, right? Then you can fight."
"That's not quite what I mea-" He is cut off by her stare. "Fine."
His eyes are barely open as he looks down at the yellow mouse. Sparks emanate from the small red patches on its cheeks. "Piiiiiiikkkkkkaaaaa. CH-"
Missingno used Double Kick!
Missingno punts the small mouse against the wall. It ricochets off the walls, floor and ceiling a bunch of times before landing at Lt. Surge's feet.
Enemy Pikachu fainted!
Missingno scoffs. "Go slim up for future gens."
Lt. Surge smiles. "I see you have what it takes. But can you deal with this?!" He sends back out his level 22 Voltorb.
"Ha! This will be easywaitdidyoujustsaylevel22?"
Yeah, it helped beat Koons, so it gained enough exp to level up.
"But…"
Yep.
"Then that means…"
Yep.
"Since it leveled up…"
Yep.
"... Crap."
As the Voltorb chases him around the room, Missingno screams at the top of his lungs. "DON'TGOBOOMDON'TGOBOOMDON'TGOBOOMDON'TGOBOOM!"
"Missingno, do something already!"
"What do you expect me to do?! It has me cornered." He shudders in the corner.
"If you lose, I will kill you!"
"If it explodes, we should all technically be dead!"
The Voltorb edges closer.
Missingno used Hyper Beam!
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. AAAAAAHHHHH. AAAAAAHHHHH…. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH." With each scream, he releases another beam of power.
…
Enemy Voltorb fainted!
A little overkill, don't you think?
Missingno falls on his face. "I really didn't want it to use Selfdestruct. So no, I don't think."
That's for sure.
Lt. Surge returns his Voltorb. "You brought me down to my last Pokemon, but you still need to recharge after your last attack!"
"Actually, in this gen, if you defeat a Pokemon then you don't need to recharge. I'm just lazy."
"Go, Raichu!" This time it is the evolution of Pikachu. Besides being bigger, its ears and tail are drastically different. It is now orange with yellow dots on its cheeks. And it no longer has fingers, just stubs for hands.
"I don't see how they are from the same evolution chain!" Missingno yells from floor.
A lot of Pokemon are like that.
"True. Bring it on!" Missingno jumps up, ready for action. But he immediately slumps over. "I'm tired. I don't want to do another battle."
You know, you never finished Double Kick.
"Oh yeah." Missingno punts the Raichu.
Hit the enemies 2 times!
It ricochets off the walls, floor and ceiling a bunch of times before landing at Lt. Surge's feet.
"Now I see how they are the in the same chain."
Missingno, just because you use the same bit on two Pokemon, does not mean they are related to each other.
"Oh, well then, I still don't understand it."
You defeated Lt. Surge!
"Whoa! You guys are the real deal! Fine then, take the Thunderbadge!"
"Cool, thanks, bye!" Missingno grabs the badge, picks up Koons, and drags Cassandra out of the gym.
"... I also have this TM for you…"
Missingno's arm stretches in to grab the disk before zipping back out.