BPOV
I let my arm fall back heavily onto my bed, in no rush to do anything except stay exactly where I am.
To be honest, it's the last thing I thought I would feel at this exact moment.
I imagined an awkward silence. An uncomfortable stillness as we clean up all unavoidable messes. Maybe some finger guns and a 'See ya next time!' before Edward runs out the door.
In actuality, it's the complete opposite.
We're still lying on my bed, Edward and I, and while we did share a laugh at Edward's attempt to clean the evidence of our good time off of my back, we make no effort to do anything else.
Truthfully, my legs are shaking so bad that I don't trust myself to attempt to walk just yet.
It's probably just nerves and adrenaline. Edward and I just filmed an incredibly personal experience between the two of us – it's natural for me to feel a little shaky at the moment. I stay with my head supported by my pillow and tell myself that's all it is, despite a very loud voice, so loud I can barely ignore it, from inside of my mind that is practically screaming about that orgasm I just had. Compliments of my best guy friend who is now not just my best guy friend.
He's my best guy friend that I fuck for money.
It's fucked up.
The whole thing. All of it.
Did we really just do this?
The most fucked up thing? I liked it.
Not only did I practically push Edward into doing this with me, I had enjoyed it to the point where I didn't have to fake anything for the camera. I don't know what that means, if it means anything at all, so I table it for now. I don't even need to look at the video that is burning a hole through Edward's phone as we speak to know that other people would enjoy it, too.
The thought makes me sit up on my elbows and lift my head so I can see Edward next to me. He's not directly next to me; he is flopped on his stomach with his head on the blankets near my shoulder, his long legs dangling off of my standard sized dorm mattress. His arms are folded beneath his head under the blankets, and I watch the rise and fall of his body as his breathing regulates back to an appropriate level. With his eyes hidden beneath the folds of his arms, I see the opportunity to take advantage of the view I've been given.
I had gotten a couple of glimpses over my shoulder throughout the evening, and now I want to admire the body, the man, that had made me see stars just a few minutes before.
Even if someone doesn't know anything about Edward Cullen, his body screams athleticism in some capacity. He's long and lean. Tanned, toned, and tantalizing. From his broad shoulders, to his tapered torso, my eyes scan downwards to the soft and slight trail of hair that leads to other significant things about him. This is the part of his body that causes literal screams, and I was its latest victim.
We're close to all the girls on our floor and in our suite, but I still had to keep it quiet. I couldn't have anyone going back to Rose and Alice about hearing all the sex-having that was happening in our room, especially when it wasn't either of the girls.
Shaking my head at my wondering thoughts, I remember what made me sit up in the first place. "How do you think it looked on camera?" I angle my body so it faces him a little more.
His response is muffled beneath the blankets and his crossed arms. He doesn't move when he answers me. "Pretty fucking good, from what I saw."
I sigh with relief and something else entirely that I can't place. I continue. "Are you okay with everything? Now that I think about it, I didn't really let you have a say in what you wanted our first time on camera to be like."
I could chalk it up to wanting to make sure we make as much money as we can, but it's really just me and who I am. If I want something done right, I do it myself.
This time, Edward emerges from the confines of his arms and turns his head to catch my eyes. His hair falls into his eyes from this angle and when he shakes his head to move it out of the way, I catch a glimpse of rosy cheeks. "I didn't really have a plan, to be honest," he shrugs and loses his focus on me, staring at the blankets between us before looking over to me again. "I was more worried I would fuck up and not be able to make us a video at all."
I laugh. "Really?"
I know he was nervous but I don't know how much. If he was as nervous as he said he was, he never showed it.
"You weren't nervous?" He looks at me like I'm full of shit.
"Of course I was," I admit, but then I move back down so we're eye level again. "I just had to keep reminding myself that it was just you."
I watch as his face softens and he lets a lazy smile dance across face.
"I get it." Edward's eyes catch mine for a moment too long and then he's sitting up with a clearing of his throat. "But yeah, all your planning made a lot of sense, actually."
"How so?" I move back up with him so we're both sitting on the bed with our legs dangling off the side. We start the process of gathering and putting our clothes back on.
He runs a hand through his hair and exhales loudly. "Well, from a technical standpoint, it's going to appeal to a lot of guys to watch it from my angle," he offers. "Especially for the first time. I'm leaving the vision up to you."
"Next time we'll try it from a different position," I say and hop off the bed, hearing Edward behind me do the same thing.
"Still from my Point of View though. That was hot," he says and pretends to hold the camera at the same angle he was before. "Being one handed sucked. I need one of those cell phone stand things." I watch him as he opens up his phone.
"Did you find one?" I ask, standing on my tip toes to catch a better look.
"Yup. Ordered. Should be delivered by Monday," he says, and puts his phone down and claps his hands. "So we should be good for next Thursday."
I nod. "Good. Gives me a whole week to come up with a new vision," I joke.
"I can only imagine what you have up your sleeve," Edward says with a shake of his head.
"I guess you'll see," I counter.
"Yeah, well, so will everyone else." With that he reaches for his phone again, a reminder to both of us that his phone holds precious goods.
Nervous again, I feel like all evidence on his phone needs to be destroyed. Immediately. "You need to put it up soon. We're down to four weeks since we had to wait a week to get our test results back."
It is reassuring to know that both of us are taking as many precautions as we can to protect ourselves, but it cost us a week. Instead of having five weeks to come up with our funds, now we're starting this mess with only four weeks to build a following and make a boatload of money.
"Yeah, I will." He's plopped himself down into my computer desk across the room, slugging a water as if he were in a desert. He catches me staring at him with a distinguishable look on my face. "Now?"
I shrug like it's obvious he should be posting this like yesterday. "Why not?" Knowing that a video like that of me is just chilling on a cell phone makes me uneasy. Why it doesn't scare me that the same video will be posted on the internet for millions to see remains to be seen.
"Because I don't want to right now," he laughs.
"Time is money, my friend!"
"You really want to watch us?" He points back and forth between us. "Together?"
Yeah, I don't think I would be able to watch our video with Edward in the same room next to me. "Okay, I guess you're right. Can we at least make our profile?"
Edward exhales and runs his hands through his hair. "So this is what you do after sex? Plot?"
"Not usually," I retort, flopping back down onto my bed. "What do you usually do?"
"Eat," he answers, rubbing his stomach. "I'm always starving right after."
Of course. I roll my eyes at him. "Aren't you always hungry?" I think I can hear his stomach growl from across the room. I concede, considering what I've made the poor guy do already. "We'll go to the café if you at least set everything up for us now."
"Fine," he says, opening the lid to his laptop. He mutters again, "But only because I can really go for a Fat Sandwich right about now."
The café stays open to the early hours on the morning and it's on campus right next to the dining hall, so it always comes in clutch when you've got to soak up the alcohol consumed or cure the munchies. I see Edward's face illuminate from the light of his laptop, and I head over to see what the process is, leaning my elbows behind him on the back of my wooden desk chair that the university provides.
"You're in charge of all of this stuff," I say, watching him fill out the required information. Seeing him do this makes it all very real, very official, and I'm suddenly more apprehensive than I've been so far.
"You trust me with this?" Edward asks, facing the laptop.
"You know more about porn that I do."
I hear him laugh as his fingers tap the keyboard softly. "I don't know about that one. You're the one who has all this porn knowledge all of a sudden."
"I research the psychology of porn," I remind him with a smack to the back of the head.
"Sure you do. You go to Pornhub for the psychology," he says mockingly before he pauses. "Hmm. Username? This is going to be fun." He stretches his arms and claps his fingers together as if he's going in for the kill.
"We'll be getting more male viewers. Statistically speaking." I add. "So we'll post it under a girl's name to attract more guys."
Edward turns around to look at me and I back up to see him better. "Bella, in an effort to be totally transparent, I gotta tell you that I don't search porn to watch based off of someone's handle or username." He turns back to the screen to finish filling out the fields on the form. "Didn't even know it was a thing."
"Okay, well, pretend you're me and you want a name that would make people want to watch a video I post."
"Alright, alright. Give me a minute."
I take the minute to disappear into the bathroom in the living room of our suite. It's empty, luckily, and I find myself looking at the girl staring back at me in the mirror. Never one to do something this ridiculous before, I weigh the cons again in my head. By the time I leave the bathroom, I've convinced myself that I can back out of this if I feel the ramifications are not worth the money or the bungalow. I'll revisit my decision next Thursday after a whole week of online viewings and income. When I walk into the room, Edward is lounging on my bed with the TV on. He stops watching and points towards my shorts. "You're wearing those?"
I see his eyes travel down then up again before looking at me strangely.
"What's wrong with these?" I turn in the mirror to see the white shorts I had on earlier.
"Nothing's wrong with them – that's what's wrong with them. You wear them to the café and you'll have other guys wanting to make videos with you."
I ignore him and walk over to his open laptop.
"Vixen_in_Position?" I look at him over my shoulder and he can't hide the smug look on his face if he tried. "That's supposed to be me?"
"Us." He corrects. "It's not exactly a lie," he adds, pointing to the spot I had been in, referring to the way I had demanded things go tonight.
"Okay, fine. Whatever. What else do you have left to do?"
"Edit," he says, and then levels me with a look. "Then post."
-ptp-
Make sure you're alone.
Those are the words I read on my phone the next day when I am pulling onto Liam's block to watch him after classes are done for the day. It's a Friday afternoon and I'm eager to get the weekend started but Edward's text and link to view our video makes me stagger my arrival in Liam's driveway. I make sure my phone is disconnected from Bluetooth – the absolute last thing I want is for the speakers in my car to blast the contents of the video I'm about to view.
As part of our contract, we each have to agree on the video before we post it, and if you think seeing yourself fucking someone on camera is awkward, you would be absolutely correct. I keep the volume down on both my phone and my car, just in case technology can somehow find another way to fail me, and I watch Edward and me on screen through the cracks of my fingers.
There wasn't much to edit to begin with, but Edward's gotten it down to six minutes, which will do the job in the porn world. Never a world I'd thought I'd be in, but here I am, and I admit that the girl looking back at me on screen doesn't necessarily find anything wrong with it.
I shake off the tingle I feel, writing it off as a natural human reaction when sex is on the horizon, when I think about being able to do it again in a week.
I couldn't turn the volume on. I text him with a cringe face emoji because it's the honest truth, and luckily he answers me back quickly.
It's okay.
You'd approve of the sounds.
I definitely approve.
From a guy's perspective.
Each of his responses come in as four separate texts as I see Liam wave at me from his front porch. I'm unprepared for the smile I make when I read about Edward's approval of the video. Taking that as my cue to table this discussion with Edward for now, I shake my head and send him my last text for a couple of hours so I can focus on Liam. I doubt I'll be able to focus at all.
Post it.
I wake up the next morning around ten, stretching against the sheets of my bed with sunshine streaming through blinds and onto my face. I don't make a move to get out of bed just yet; the first couple of minutes between sleep and wake are my favorite minutes of the day. For a couple of moments, I can forget everything and just be. It gives me a couple of minutes before my brain catches up to reality, before my body gets the signal to shoot up in my bed and hastily reach for my phone. I always wondered what waking up as a porn star would feel like.
I don't feel too different.
Definitely a little different.
Edward posted our video around 4:00 yesterday afternoon and I am dying to see how many hits we have gotten overnight. As I scoop up my phone, I look over to Rose and Alice to make sure they're still sleeping before I log into our account on the website. There's a traffic counter we can view on our account that shows us how many hits we've gotten and how much money we have accumulated through ad revenue. My hand flies to my mouth when I see that in less than twenty four hours, we've pocketed almost five hundred dollars.
$250 apiece.
In less than one day with only one video.
My brain still swimming to think straight, I use the calculator on my phone for some speculations. If this video generates close to five hundred dollars a day, for the next four weeks or so, that would give us way over ten thousand dollars.
Possibly.
I text Edward a barrage of these thoughts of mine through text, expecting him to ignore them all as he sleeps his morning away like he does on most Saturday's. While I wait for him to wake up, I pace back and forth in my room before deciding to go for a run on campus to kill some time and some of my adrenaline.
I lose myself in my worries as I run, my pace trying to match the relentless scenarios I have twirling through my head. If I'm right, I think to myself as my sneakers bump against the molten concrete, we may not have to worry about any of this. Not only would we secure what we need for the rent, deposit, and car, we would have a lot left over. As exciting as that sounds, the realist in me speaks louder: None of this is guaranteed.
All these patterns I've mapped out, all the different scenarios playing in my head, are not the concrete answers that I'm desperate for. I can feel my run come to an end and I'm just as worked up as I was before I started. I want to be able to move in to our new place with excitement and not dread that I don't know how next month's rent is coming in. I shoot off another text to Edward before I change my mind, aware of how crazy I sound.
We need to make another video!
I know I will feel better once we have more than one video circulating out there. More videos mean more income which means I could maybe relax a little bit and enjoy the last few weeks of the semester with everyone before the guys graduate.
When I come back from my run, Alice and Rose are awake and getting dressed for the day.
"We're going on a Target run," Alice says as she slides her feet into a pair of sandals. "Wanna come? We want to look at some stuff for the bungalow."
I shake my head, tossing my phone and earbuds onto my bed. I try not to let the stress of Edward not answering me show to the girls. I point to myself and the sweat dripping off of me.
"Not like this," I say with a laugh. "Next time."
"You want us to pick you up a Smoothie on the way back?" Rose asks, reaching for her keys and phone. There's a Tropical Smoothie Café in the same lot as Target that completely owns us all. We get a Smoothie from there any chance we get.
"Yeah, thanks. Call me when you're there."
The second I see the girls leave, I hop over onto my bed and pick up the phone, dialing Edward's number and not caring if I wake him up. He answers on almost the last ring, sounding and acting like I'm waking him up in the middle of the night as opposed to almost noon on a blazing hot almost summer day. His voice is muffled with sleep but that doesn't stop me.
"You have to come over now. Alice and Rose are at Target. We've got at least two hours before they're back."
"Two hours for what?"
"To make another tape," I rush, gathering everything I need for the shower. "Did you read my messages? $500 isn't enough for me."
"Hold on," Edward says, and I know he's reading over everything I've sent him this morning. "I don't know if it's good or not but I'm pretty impressed with $500 in not even one day."
"We're definitely $500 richer than we were yesterday," I agree, continuing before he can talk me out of it. "Which is great, but –"
"I don't know if we need to make another one just yet," Edward interrupts me, an unstifled yawn coming through at the tail end of his words. He and his ability to reason are usually great character traits but today it's driving me nuts. "I want to see how this one does for a little bit. It looks like it's doing okay."
Like the Little Engine That Could, Edward wants to watch our little video hit it big.
"It's doing great," I agree again but this time with a huff of annoyance in my voice, "It's just not enough to make me feel better about making the money we need on time."
"Hey, I get it. Waiting sucks." He sighs on the other end of the phone. "Besides, didn't we agree on only once a week?"
"Ugh, yes." I flop back down onto my bed, the towel I had wrapped around myself to walk to the shower becoming loose. I actually hear him laugh at me. Not like that was new or anything.
"I mean, we break one rule and before we know it, we'll break them all." He pauses to let his words soak in and I hate how rational he is sometimes, even though I need his rationalizing self to keep me from doing stupid shit from time to time. Edward sighs and I can almost see him running his fingers through his hair. " Look, the money looks to be great, your room is empty, the sex is pretty good – and I'm saying no to this why? What time should I be over?"
"Now."
-ptp-
I'm finishing up putting lotion on every inch of my skin after my shower when Edward calls to tell me he's outside my dorm and that someone has let him in. I leave my room and walk through our shared living area in our suite just as Edward knocks on the door. Opening it, I pause momentarily to take him in before turning on my heel and leading us back to my room.
He looks like the casual Edward I know, loose gym shorts paired with a tee-shirt and Nike slides on his feet. A black hat sits backwards on his head, no doubt covering that wild mane of hair that he didn't have time to tame before coming here.
He makes sure to lock my door behind us once we're in my room. "You're sure they won't be back any time soon?"
I laugh and turn around to face him like he should know better. "They're in Target. It's the Promised Land." I watch him as he drops his phone and dorm key onto my dresser with a gentle clang. "Besides, they're calling me when they're at Tropical Smoothie for my order."
He nods and moves further into my room, looking over at me with a humorous expression on his face as he moves to stand in front of where I stand in front of my bed. "We need to discuss how we're one day into this and already breaking the –"
"No time for that right now," I interrupt him and reach down in front of me, crossing my arms at the bottom of my shirt and lifting it right over my head. Perfect day to forego a bra. Still too quick for Edward to catch on to what is happening, I reach forward to take the bottom of his shirt into my own hands and haul it over his head.
I hear his protests but he's not quick enough to stop me. His shirt is dangling over the back of his head like a nun and my sudden movements have left him staggering into my desk.
"Bell – oof!"
He flings his shirt off of his head and stares at me like I've gone mad.
"Sorry," I say as he looks at me crazily and tries to stand himself upright. "But not sorry." I close the distance between us again and reach for the strings on his shorts, loose enough on his hips for the strings to just swing there like an accessory without a purpose, and I wonder why he bothers with strings at all when I see his shorts pool onto my floor like they've done this a thousand times.
He's standing in a pair of boxer briefs that do nothing to hide his eagerness to get our second encounter on film, his eyes roaming over my exposed skin before pulling me against him with one hand on my hip. We're flush against each other now, naked flesh upon naked flesh, his move taking me off guard a little. I guess I now know how it feels considering my last move had him almost head first into my dresser.
"My phone stand hasn't been delivered." He says, his mouth brushing against the side of my face near my temple as he watches me slip my shorts down my legs.
"Just hold it again." I remind him, sliding my hand across his waist and flat stomach to reach for his hand. I walk us backward to my bed, our pinkies the only thing grasped together. For now.
"This way," I murmur, lying on my back with my elbows holding me up for a proper view. Edward pauses, unabashedly staring at me as I scoot myself to the edge of the bed again.
Edward walks over to me, to the edge of the bed, and drops his boxer briefs from his hips and onto the floor. With a grasp of my hips in his hands, he slides me down the bed to exactly where I need to go.
Thank God for bed risers and perfect levels.
I know that if I were to ever be in charge of the camera from my point of view, he would not be disappointing to look at.
Quite the opposite, in fact.
"Same rules as last time?" He asks with a deep breath, his phone camera ready in hand. Right before he enters me, he lets out a small laugh. "Not like you actually follow rules these days anymore."
I laugh and flip him off for good measure.
"Yes," I say, answering him about the rules, but I say it at the same time that he slides inside me, and he finds me wanting and ready for him. It comes out as a 'Yes' with far too many syllables for the average word and in a whisper of what my usual voice sounds like.
Our first video – we were amateurs.
Now, our second video, and I feel like we're professionals.
The way he uses his one hand to film and the other to explore makes it seem like we've been doing this for years instead of just one previous time. I lean up on my elbows again, watching as his large hand slides up my leg to hold onto my hip, to press myself closer to him and his camera-ready thrusts. He's creating a maddening pace as he slips in and out, a combination of slow and seductive to fast and frenzied.
I can barely keep up, my head tilted back now on my bedspread, sounds slipping out of my mouth that I never knew I could make. I arch into his hand as it continues its journey upward, his nails fluttering and leaving barely-there fingerprints against peaks so sensitive they ache for a touch of his lips, his tongue.
Unaware of the world around me, I lean up on my elbows again, unable to stop myself from getting a view of his hands all over me and himself disappearing within me with each thrust. He must have taken note to the other night when I told him that he needs to be heard on camera too, because his moans of fuuck and shiit that come out of his mouth makes me want to hear them all over again.
His thumb, which has snuck between us to press on my clit, leaves abruptly to slide up my body again to stay between my breasts. With gentle force, he pushes me back down again and his eyes, dark and determined, motion towards the camera in his hand.
I must have gotten too close to view.
It is now, as I feel myself shatter around him, that I realize I had completely forgotten about the camera at all.
What a week! Glad to be back!
See you soon!