by foot it's a slow climb
Chapter 5
:::
The Third Jade of Gusu...
Was - was that supposed to be me?
Did I have a reputation?
Lan Xichen was waiting for me at the gates, with his perfect posture and his perfect hair blowing in the wind. His face traced by the gold sunlight was almost guided. The gate guards were darting glances at his face, and looking very flustered. I get you, random gate guards. Lan Xichen was too pretty to be real. Too bad I was in no mood to appreciate it.
"Lan-xiangong," I called out.
He turned and gave me a bright smile. The gate guard to the left made a tiny choked sound. Lan Xichen didn't seem to notice, as he touched me on the shoulder. "Ruizhi. You went to the healers? What did they say?"
Sometimes, I reflected, the world was really unfair. Why are Lan men so pretty? It was terrible for my self control.
"I'm fine," I said. "It was barely a scratch." I hesitated. Do I ask? Do I really want to know if I messed up that badly?
… Goddamn it. Me and my curiosity.
"Lan-xiangong do you have any idea who the third Jade of Gusu is?" I whispered.
Lan Xichen blinked. "Isn't that you?"
Fuck.
"Why would it be me?" I asked. "I haven't done anything to earn a nickname in the first place!"
Lan Xichen - laughed. My heart sank. Whatever he said next, I was going to hate it. I could feel it in my bones.
"Ruizhi, you're the youngest person to ever pass the fourth level testing. Of course people are going to talk about it! Not to mention how well you keep up with Wangji and myself, though it might be a bit arrogant to say. It's been nearly two years since you earned your own title." He smiled at me. "The year of night hunting just solidified it. Uncle is still receiving thank you letters from villages you helped along the way. Gusus' reception among the common folk has never been higher. The elders, and Uncle, in particular have been very pleased with you."
That was it?
Night hunts, my age, and passing a stupid test?
What did the night hunts have to do with anything? As a cultivator, none of them were particularly impressive; mostly just low level ghouls, walking corpses, and minor curses from resentful energy. Civilians might be impressed, but that was just because they didn't know any better. Cultivators did! It was - literally just my job. What was impressive about doing my job?
Cultivators made no sense!
Not to mention, even my age was nothing to write home about. Wangji was better than me in most areas - I barely matched him by working insanely hard. My brothers were all talented cultivators, leagues better than I was. If anything, I was barely average!
The test wasn't even worth mentioning. It wasn't that hard! College finals in my first life were more grueling. The hardest part was not being knocked the fuck out by Lan Xichen. Why would anyone focus on me when, most of the time, I was standing by Wangji and Lan Xichen -
"Ruizhi, is something wrong?" Lan Xichen asked.
I stared at him, then I closed my eyes. Deep breaths.
The only explanation was -
I done fucked up.
I done fucked up bad.
When I decided to stay in Gusu, my plans had to be adjusted. I couldn't avoid the plot entirely but I could ignore it. The goal was obscurity. I wanted people to look at me and go 'oh yeah, that one kid who's always hanging around the second young master,' and nothing else.
For the most part, I kept to myself. In Gusu I was most often found in the library, or the training grounds with Wangji. The other disciples, both my peers and not, tended to leave me in peace to my own work. Lan Qiren even gave me permission to study on my own, once I proved to him I was keeping abreast of what he taught in his classes may be passed around the disciples of Gusu, but nothing important or relevant to me. I didn't talk to other disciples unless I absolutely had to.
I forgot to take into account who, exactly, I did talk to.
Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji, the prettiest, most graceful people in the room, every room, no matter where it was. If they were standing next to me - wouldn't that sort of light illuminate me as well? Wasn't I basically holding up an engraved invitation to curiosity?
Anyone the Twin Jades spent time with must, of course, be worth that time. I could've been the ugliest, least talented person in the entire history of Gusu and, by the transitive property of prettiness, I'd be worth gossiping about.
Basically: I was fucked.
I buried my head in my hands and let out an inarticulate whine. It was the most undignified sound I'd ever made, and I didn't even care.
"Ruizhi? Is everything alright? I can summon the healers," Lan Xichen gently lifted my face up to look at, his perfect brows scrunched in concern. "If you are truly not feeling well, I know uncle wouldn't mind you going to the healers before you paid your respects."
I stared, dead eyed, at the very source of my trouble: Lan Xichen's stupid, perfect face. My doom had skin paler than the moon and cheekbones that could kill a man.
Staying in Gusu was a Mistake.
I couldn't even be mad at him. It was no one's fault but mine.
I'm the dumbass.
"You know what?" I said to the world at large. "I don't want to be awake right now."
Lan Xichen blinked. "Ruizhi?"
I bowed to him. "Give Teacher Lan my regrets, and assurances I will be available at his earliest convenience tomorrow morning. I am feeling unwell."
"Shall I summon the healers?" Lan Xichen asked quietly.
"No, I'm just... tired. Healing is harder than it looks," I said. It wasn't even a lie. The past two days felt like they were a month long. I have failed at literally every single thing I've planned for the past two years in forty two hours.
The day isn't even over yet.
"Please excuse me," I said.
"Of course. Please get some more rest; don't overwork yourself," Lan Xichen said. His voice was soft and concerned. "I can send Wangji to stay with you, if you want."
I summon up a passable smile. "That won't be necessary. I'll be fine by tomorrow, so please don't cause him any concern."
He's… busy.
Wei Wuxian has his attention right now.
:::
I collapsed face first into my own bed for the first time in one year and three months, pressed the blanket to my face, and let a muffled, frustrated scream.
One second. Two seconds. Three Seconds.
Then I shove off the cover, climb out of bed, and sat on the floor in lotus position. My heart was racing, and I could feel a panic attack coming on and I was not dealing with that today.
So I meditated.
Consider: Lan Xichen implied that, though the night hunting might have helped, I was considered a Jade of Gusu even before it.
Consider: I had a reputation. Apparently, I had a reputation for years without noticing.
Consider: To start damage control on this disaster, I might have to do something unpleasant like leave Gusu, or worse, stop talking to Wangji and Lan Xichen - my only real friends.
The looks the juniors sometimes gave me made much more sense now. It also explained why sometimes people in my peer group would ask for tips on homework. To them I was on Wangji's level, but much more friendly looking, even though, in reality, I was much meaner than Wangji was ever willing to be.
Conclusion: There was nothing I could do about this - this stupidity.
My only option was waiting it out. If I kept my cool, if I stayed under the radar, if I stopped going on so many night hunts and stayed in the library researching like I was planning to do anyway...
There was always more interesting drama. Cultivators would move on to the next scandal.
People would forget.
Right?
I opened my eyes and flopped over onto the floor with a groan.
...Whatever. It was't like I could hit people for calling me that stupid nickname, no matter how much I wanted too. Okay, okay, okay. I took a deep breath, held it, and when I exhaled, it was like I took the whole third jade thing and dumped it out of my head. I immediately felt better. Third Jade who? Never heard of it.
God bless future Nie Huiasang, my lord and savior. He gave me the perfect model of thought to cling too.
When in doubt, deny, deny, deny.
Smile and nod and be utterly oblivious.
I don't know, I don't know, I really don't know.
:::
The next morning dawned with clarity, both in the cloudless sky and inside my head. Having a plan always made me relax, even if it was just the same plan I already had, but even more this time.
I washed and dressed, just before a knock came at my door. It turned out to be a disciple sent by Lan Qiren who requested I join him for breakfast.
Which was how Lan Qiren asked me to cook for him.
I was going to ask for something today anyway - it was better to have the old man in a good mood. Breakfast was simple fare, something suited for an older man, with medicinal properties that improved blood pressure and cleared the mind. I even steeped a pot of mint tea. I brought two trays, and kneeled before Lan Qiren's office door. I knocked, announced myself and waited.
"Enter," Lan Qiren said.
I took a steadying breath. Okay.
Show time.
He looked the same as ever. There was a severe look on his face that suited him. He was as handsome as any Lan - except for that goatee. I privately gave two thumbs up to Wei Wuxian's mom. If I had the guts, I'd shave it off too. He would look so much better without it.
"Grandmaster," I said. "This humble student has brought breakfast, if it pleases you."
Lan Qiren would never do anything as uncouth as smile - but I catch the way his eyes dart to the tray, and his hands twitch a bit. "Yan Ruizhi has gone to much trouble. Your teacher is pleased. Enter, and sit. We have much to discuss," He paused. "After breakfast."
I entered the room with careful steps, posture straight, and every movement correct. Decorum didn't stop at words - the way you turned, the way you placed your hands, even the way you looked at things - every action had a right and proper way to be performed.
Pride was against the rules, but I was confident in my proper conduct. My maternal grandmother before she was a priest was an extremely high class courtesan. All of my brothers learned manners from her, and I was the same. She was a hard taskmaster - she had to be. Her clients often included nobility. Offend the pride of the wrong person, and my grandmother could have been dragged away to jail or even killed.
My brothers might have complained, but I thrived in the etiquette lessons. There were concrete rules of behavior! If someone does x, you must do y. The socially oblivious me could, with rigid adherence to the rules, understand why people did what they were doing. It was a godsend.
I served up breakfast with utter decorum. It was almost meditative, under Lan Qiren's watchful eye. He reminded me of my grandmother - though she was much more flexible, thinking-wise. Breakfast went over without incident. No speech while eating. It was a simple, light meal, and half an hour later, it was done. Lan Qiren set down his chopsticks, and my heart picked up it's pace.
Okay.
Showtime.
"I have received your reports from Shang Qingha. There were no errors, and it seems you have not let your calligraphy skill wear down while out in the world. Xichen informed me you outgrew your own clothes?" Lan Qiren glanced at my uniform.
I bowed slightly. "Forgive this student his unseemly appearance, Grand master. Wangji was kind enough to lend this student one of his spares, while the tailors made new ones."
Lan Qiren nodded after a moment, but not before a strange expression flickered across his face. I couldn't read it. My stomach twisted. "It is, of course, a virtue to help one's friends when they are in need. The two of you are close."
"It is an honor that the Grandmaster thinks so," I said. "Wangji has always been a good friend to this student."
"Hmm."
Hmm? What hmm? What kind of response was that?
...Please don't drop any more bombs on me, Grandmaster. This student's mental state is fragile. I don't know how many more shocks I can take before I just give up and retreat into seclusion until the whole damn plot was over.
Lan Qiren pulled a paper out of a stack of them on his desk. He scanned it, and a small frown emerged. "Su She," He said at last.
Ah.
"This student witnessed it with his own eyes, Grandmaster. There was no misunderstanding to be found in Su She's actions. He did not hesitate at all. If this student had not been half way there already, Young Master Wei would have fallen into the middle of a waterborne abyss. The negative effect of the resentful energy alone..."
The more I thought about it, the worse it felt. Su She was a moron. From his minute eye twitch, Lan Qiren felt the same. A head disciple getting injured like that by one of Gusu's own after being saved in the first place? It was - bad, politically speaking.
... I was glad managing that wasn't my problem.
Lan Qiren sighed. "It has been nearly a year since he joined us, and he still does such a thing? There have been other complaints over his behavior as well. Maliciously endangering another student, even if it was that Wei Wuxian, is unconscionable. He will have to go."
I bowed again. "Grandmaster is wise."
"Xichen mentioned that you were injured?"
"This student thanks the Grandmaster for his concern, but it was barely a scratch. This student was taught to care for his own wounds by the healers, and practiced much over the year away."
Lan Qiren nodded. "As expected. Then, I will give you an assignment. It was reckless to throw yourself so near to the waterborne abyss. You will write a paper on Water Borne Abysses, to be turned in a week from now," He eyed me. "Do not throw your life away, Yan Ruizhi."
Ah.
Okay. I could do this. Just... throw it on the pile, I guess.
"This student hears and obeys, Grandmaster," I took a deep breath and bowed until my head almost touched the floor. My heart beat in my chest. This was so much worse than night hunts. "Begging the Grandmaster's pardon, but this student has a request."
I stared down at the polished wood floor of the study, heart in my throat. Silence pressed down on me like a boot on my throat. I understood his surprise. I honestly didn't ask for things that often, and even then they were small things and rarely formal. To study on my own, to cook my own food - I think that was it.
"Ask," He said finally.
Step one down. I could feel a bead of sweat roll down my neck.
"This student would like access to the restricted section of the Gusu library," I said without raising my head.
I might be a part of GusuLan, but I wasn't a Lan by blood. The restricted section contained Lan family techniques, created by Lans for Lans. The only way to get access was to be born a Lan or marry in. Most people didn't even know it existed. Asking for access as an outsider?
It was rude. Incredibly rude! Horribly, terribly rude! Grounds for being kicked out, no ifs, ands, or buts! Not a single person would condemn Lan Qiren for expelling me, here and now, including myself.
I was embarrassed to say the words!
More quiet.
I knew this was a bad idea. Please don't kill me, Lan Qiren. So long as Lan Qiren didn't kick me out of Gusu for my presumption, I could backpedal - Wangji would be disappointed in my rudeness, but Xichen might speak on my behalf. I was a good student - If I apologized and groveled right now, I might get out of this with all my skin intact.
I stayed bowed.
"Sit up. Explain," Lan Qiren said, voice flat.
He didn't immediately expel me, so that was a win.
I swallowed and sat up, my posture perfect. My trembling hands were hidden by Wangji's long sleeves. "This stude - this unworthy one has been looking into talismans that would mitigate the effect of fire."
"There are fire resistance talismans already in circulation."
"Yes, for normal fires. There is nothing that protects against fire created from qi," I glanced at my report still laying across his desk.
Lan Qiren stilled.
Qi fueled fire was one of the Wen clan's best techniques. It burnt so hot that normal talismans were useless. The stronger among the Wens could even burn hot enough to melt a cultivators sword. The protections of GusuLan were legendary, but they paled in the face of Qi fire.
I couldn't stop them from coming, or avert the war - but I could stop them from torching all of the books in the library. There were books in the regular library pavilion on creating talismans from scratch, so I had a place to start. Something like blocking Qi fire? Complicated was putting it mildly.
I'd exhausted what the library could give me - I needed more information.
"Why," Lan Qiren asked carefully. "Would you need something like that?"
"The Waterborne Abyss - it was not there when this student left," I said quietly. "The people in Caiyi town are strong swimmers. How could enough people drown in a single year to make one?"
Lan Qiren looked at the report, face unreadable. After a small eternity he sighed, looking years older. The tension drained out of the room. I felt like I could breathe again.
"You have always been mature for your age, Ruizhi. Perhaps too mature. That a student of mine has to worry about something like this… it is my failure as a teacher."
Whew. He wasn't too offended by my request, if he could still call me his student. I smiled slightly, pretending my hands weren't trembling, and bowed again. "Grandmaster is a teacher without peer. This student has no complaints. It is only that the Cloud Recesses are also this student's home. It is natural to wish to defend it."
Lan Qiren gave me a wry look. "Sect Leader Jin was impressed with your diplomacy, and now I see why. Perhaps you should accompany Xichen when he goes to the next conference."
Sect Leader Jin said what? He still remembered me? Why? Did… did Jin Guangshan know about that Third Jade of Gusu thing? Was that why he was so interested?
Just how long have I had that stupid nickname?
...Nope, not going to think about it.
Also, no way in hell.
"This student fears that he would only be a distraction to Lan-xiangong. This student will have to respectfully decline." I said immediately.
A gathering of cultivators that I couldn't run away from?
No thanks!
Lan Qiren gave a look, and I shut up.
This was going well so far. I didn't need my big mouth screwing me over again.
He glanced down at the report on the desk. "Where would you be placing these talismans, when you were done with them?"
"The Library Pavilion," I said promptly.
Lan Qiren frowned. "You think they will target our library? For what reason?"
Well, before I was reborn I read a story about your least favorite student and in it, the Wen's attacked and burned down the library and injured you and killed your brother...
Ha ha, no. I didn't want to die today.
Time to fib my way to victory!
"This student cannot know for sure, but...the GusuLan Library is famed throughout the land. There are none better in any other sect," I said, which was true. "Would the Grandmaster be pleased if another sect claimed they had a better one? Sect Leader Wen is very proud of his sect. To outshine the sun... would he not consider it arrogance?"
Lan Qiren nodded once. "I see."
Yeah. Wen Rohan was the type of douche who wanted to be better than anyone else in every category. It wasn't like he was a reasonable person. Didn't he do the same thing to the Nie Sect leader, when Wen Rohan broke the man's saber for being better than a sword he possessed?
When you were as powerful as Wen Rohan, you didn't have to play by the rules.
"Very well," Lan Qiren said at last. "Your reasoning is sound and your motives are righteous. If it were anyone else, I would have expelled them for such rudeness immediately. In light of both of my nephews' fondness for you, and your own exemplary attitude and conduct until now, I will refrain."
Thank god for favoritism.
I bowed my head in a salute again. "Thanking the Grandmaster for his forbearance and mercy."
It was easier to breathe at least. I shut down the little bit of disappointment in my heart. Not being kicked out was honestly better than I expected. I might not get access to the restricted section, but that just meant I had to search outside - perhaps go to another sect as a foreign disciple to learn that way? I didn't really want to leave the Cloud Recesses, but if I had to I would. YunnmengJiang would be a good option, but...
Protagonist.
Then again, my second best option would be the Jin, and - yeah.
Why were all the sects so terrible?
"Raise your head, Yan Ruizhi."
Uh. That tone was strange and I didn't like it. I did as he ordered, and keeping my face carefully blank. Excessive emotion is forbidden. Excessive speech is forbidden. Disrespect of an elder is forbidden. Making a goddamn scene because I felt like I was going to have a panic attack wasn't against any specific rules, but it was probably against the spirit of the rules.
Lan Qiren studied me, glancing over my borrowed robe, for one excruciating moment. I felt very awkward in it all of a sudden. Should I have waited until the tailors were done with my new robes? No, I didn't have the time for that. Who knows when the Wen's would decide to attack? Not everyone was a genius of inventing new things like Wei Wuxian. I had to take advantage of all the time I had.
He gave me a wry look. "I supposed it was only a matter of time."
...?
Please don't talk in riddles, Grandmaster. Your student's mind is fragile.
"Very well," Lan Qiren said. "Yan Ruizhi, your request to see the restricted section will be granted."
I - what?
"R-really?" I blurted out, then shrank back under the look he gave me. I bowed my head in apology, heart in my throat.
"Yes. You will only access the restricted library while one of the elders, or Xichen present, and then only two hours per day. You may take notes of the books you read, but copying any texts in full is absolutely forbidden," He speared me with an unamused look. "I am giving you a tremendous amount of trust with this, Yan Ruizhi. It would be best not to abuse it."
He was. He really, really was.
I bowed low again. "This student hears and understands, Grandmaster. I will not let you down."
:::
I was escorted to the restricted Library Pavilion in a daze. I couldn't believe that half-assed plan just - worked. Amazing. Was this what if felt like to actually have a plan that worked? It was kind of tingly.
Thank god I hadn't gone with my original idea of just breaking in and asking forgiveness later.
The elder waiting for me at the library pavilion was both surprised and surprising.
"I wondered who persuaded Qiren to give them access to the library. Of course it would be you," Lan Qingtian said, a tiny amused smile on his face.
Lan QingTian, a relative of the main branches of Lans, was the whole reason I was in Gusu. He was the one who extended the invitation to my family in the first place. My father's friend, despite being at least thirty years older. As a cultivator, the only sign of his age was a few white streaks in his hair and the smile lines around his mouth. I didn't like talking to him. Well. I didn't like talking to anyone, but he always rubbed me the wrong way. He always seemed like he found the world in general - and me in particular - hilarious.
Also, he might be my grandfather? My grandmother had no husband, and I had no idea who my maternal grandfather was. I knew that Lan QingTian, a very un-lan Lan, was a client of hers in their youths before he met and married his current wife.
It made the whole thing a little weird on my end.
"Elder Lan," I said with a bow, ignoring the question. If I don't acknowledge the general weirdness of the Lan, I won't have to deal with it.
The old man laughed, and beckoned me to follow him. "I suppose you do take after your father, after all. I was beginning to think you inherited all of your mother's hardworking nature and none of your father's penchant for surprising me. A year of night hunting followed by asking Lan Qiren, of all people, for access to the forbidden texts. You are very lucky he likes you, A-Xi."
I keep my face smooth, though I totally agree with Lan Qingtian. The only reason Lan Qiren liked me was because his nephews did. I needed to do something nice for Lan Xichen and Wangji soon. They saved my ass.
"Grandmaster Lan is wise," I said.
Lan Qingtian shot me an amused look. "Such a sweet mouth. Yan Ruizhi resembles his grandmother more every day."
I ducked my head to hide my pleased smile. "This student thanks the elder for his kind words."
Seriously. My maternal grandmother had the poise of a goddess, the eloquence of a diplomat, the grace of a dancer, and a spine made of iron. Steel wishes it was made of her nerves.
She was, no joke, the coolest person I'd ever met.
In two lifetimes.
Lan Qingtian took me through the library, to a small unmarked side door. He tapped his hand against the door and I almost flinched back from the unexpected burst of light that resulted. That was some serious protection. I'm glad I didn't go with the first plan to just break in. I'd probably be dead.
The other side of the door was the same as the regular library layout, but there was a sort of quiet pressure pushing down on me. My eyes flicked from shelf to shelf. My hands twitched. My mouth went dry.
I wanted to read everything.
"You have two hours. The basics of talisman creation is over in the far shelf," Lan QingTian said.
I might have broken a rule or two in my haste.
Lan Qingtian laughed.
:::
After my two hours were up, I reluctantly left my research behind, taking only my notes with me. It honestly made me a bit sad to leave all those books behind, unread. It felt like they were calling out for me to pick them up and devour the contents.
I'll be back, I promised them silently.
Firstly, I stopped by to pick up my new robes. It was only one set at the moment, because the tailors of GusuLan might be talented, even they couldn't whip up brand new robes with all the protections that implied. I changed into the new robes and ran a hand over the even stitching. All wards and protections were done in white thread, making them nearly invisible except to the touch. I chatted with the tailor while he fixed up a few areas, content to mostly listen while he explained how a particular ward worked and why, and which thread was best. He seemed pleased with my existing knowledge of weaving and sewing.
Apparently, many young Cultivators found tailoring beneath them. The healers said the same thing in the week I stayed with them to learn.
Sometimes, I don't get cultivators. Cooking, tailoring, healing - how was it beneath your pride to learn something you could use to keep yourself alive? It was basic common sense. Pride wasn't worth much if you died of stupidity.
The tailor invited me to come back in a few days to learn more, and I - quite pleased - accepted. More learning was never a waste.
With my new well perfectly fit robes, I made my way to the dinning hall. It was a large, graceful building, much like the rest of the Cloud Recesses. Lan Qiren was sitting in his customary place on the raised dais at the head of the dining hall. It was large enough to fit in the new Lan disciples and all of the guest disciples.
Wei Wuxian sat next to an unsmiling young man. The moment Wei Wuxian caught sight of me, he grinned and waved. "A-xi! A-Xi! Come sit over here with us! I saved you a place," He called out - and in doing so, drew the attention of every single disciple in the fucking room; putting me in the place I hated most - the center of attention.
I'm gonna fucking fight Wei Wuxian. Square up, pretty boy, and prepare to get dunked on.
My palms started to sweat, and I was very aware of every eye on me. I kept my face blank and polite only through years of training.
GusuLan disciples would never do anything so uncouth as to break out into whispers, but I swear to god the disciples sat up straighter as my eyes passed over them. Gusu might be a big sect, but after a few years I knew all the junior disciples by face, if not by name. The ones I didn't know looked at me with eyes like lamps, big and bright.
With a horrified jolt, I recognized the look in their eyes as the same type as my peers: Admiration. I could almost read their thoughts.
The Third Jade of Lan was back!
Stop looking up to me! I'm a horrible gremlin! Wangji was sitting right there, next to my usual seat. Idolize him! Or Lan Xichen, the pinnacle of grace, sitting next to his uncle! Anyone but me would do!
I turned to Wei Wuxian, because it was easier than breaking into frustrated tears.
I saluted Wei Wuxian politely. "Thanking Young Master Wei for his thoughtfulness, I must refuse. As I am a GusuLan disciple, I must sit among them."
Wei Wuxian pouted at me, seemingly immune to the scene he was causing. "Didn't I tell you to not be so formal? Aren't we friends already? You saved my life you know! That makes us at least friends - no, brothers!"
Aaand suddenly the boy next to him was scowling at me with murder in his eyes. Definitely Jiang Cheng.
Please don't blame me for Wei Wuxian's stupid whims.
Seriously. I was going to fight Wei Wuxian. I've known him for barely three days, and every single one was terrible. Protagonist or not, he was going the fuck down. I was gonna turn him into paste. I struggled to find a polite way to say 'fuck this, fuck you, fuck off', Lan Qiren's voice cut through the air like a whip.
"Wei Wuxian, cease pestering my students. Ruizhi, sit down."
Oh, thank god. I bowed to Lan Qiren and complied. Jiang Cheng mercifully elbowed Wei Wuxian hard in the side when he opened his mouth to protest. Two thumbs up from me, Jiang Cheng.
Even if he was still glaring at me.
Why?
I settled into place beside Wangji. With his general aura of 'don't even think of looking at me mortal' most of the disciples went back to their own business.
"Okay?" He asked in a low voice.
I gave him an exhausted smile . "It's just been a long day - I'll tell you about it after dinner, in the Jingshi. I need to give back your clothes anyway."
Wangji blinked, eyes going unfocused, hands pressing into his knees where only I was angled to see him. I glanced down the row to check if Wei Wuxian was doing anything. He was making faces at his food, but nothing that distracting. I nudged my friend slightly. "Wangji?" Earth to the Second Jade of Lan. Are you daydreaming about your future husband? I don't have any problem with that, but maybe a public dinner was not the best place. "Wangji?"
He still wasn't responding.
I elbowed him in the side, discreetly.
Seriously, Lan Qiren was right there. Pick a better time to fantasize about Wei Wuxian's pretty pout, or whatever.
He jerked and shifted back slightly. He seemed faintly embarrassed. "Mm. Jingshi."
The food is brought in, giving me no chance to reply.
I poked at it, not really hungry. Did Wangji really have to keep ignoring me in favor of Wei Wuxian? It was stupid, but I felt kinda... not great about it. Wei Wuxian might be his soul mate, the love of his life, the jelly to his peanut butter, but I was still his friend. I kinda wanted to grab Wangji by the ears and force him to look at me. Maybe if I kissed Wei Wuxian in front of him, he'd -
My brain did a perfect replica of a record scratch.
He'd what - cut me into itty bitty pieces? What the hell, brain? I know my plans are usually bad but where did that idiocy come from? I stabbed the bitter medicinal salad with my chopsticks.
Fucking hormones. Christ on a cracker, I cannot wait until I'm not a teenager anymore.
Wei Wuxian's pretty face wasn't worth dying for.
I glanced up, and caught someone looking at me. Someone familiar. Someone in Jin gold.
Shit. I forgot he was going to be here too.
Jin Ziyuan blinked at me, and gave me a regal nod. There was something suspiciously friendly about the tilt of his head, especially compared the way his flunkies death glares. He mouthed something to me. 'I need to talk to you.'
The hairs on the back of my neck rose.
Nope.
I give him a polite smile, trying to convey 'I do not understand you' as hard as I can, and look down so he can't try to elaborate.
I stab my terrible salad some more.
I don't start crying pathetically into my food, and I, for one, am very impressed with my self control.
:::
Hey y'all. I'm gonna be doing some side stories from the other characters' povs, but they won't be included in this story. The first one up will be lwj and his year of isolation.
Also, i'm gonna be mixing and matching cannons very liberally, by which i mean that i'm going off the books and i'll sprinkle in some drama scenes if they're funny enough. Yin iron? Not funny enough.
Drunk Lwj? Definitely funny enough.