December 22nd

To say that Derek had mixed feelings about how his conversation with Emily had gone would be an understatement. But he respected Emily far too much to press her for something she wasn't able to give him.

But he was going to stand by his promise to be there as her friend, even if it killed him. (And, if the feeling in his chest when he looked at her was any indication, it just might...) But that was a matter for another time because he wasn't sure he could face too much introspection right now without wanting to rip his heart from his chest...

The next day, after actually going home and sleeping, he'd come up with an idea. Perhaps it was above and beyond the call of duty for friendship, but that had never stopped him before when it came to Emily...

"What are we doing here?" JJ asked, coming through the door of the house he'd given Emily, finding Derek attired in paint-splattered pants and a t-shirt that was, perhaps, a little too tight (since it was from the law school he'd attended years ago).

"You're going to help me surprise Emily," he informed her.

She gave him a look that clearly questioned his motives.

He didn't give her a chance to voice those questions, though. "Before you say anything, Emily and I are not dating. She made it clear she's not ready, so I'm not going to push her. This is just one friend helping another."

She seemed dubious about that, but knew better than to challenge him and his stubbornness. "Okay, so what exactly are we doing?"

"Decorating the nursery," he said merrily, handing her a paintbrush.

Her expression turned even more unimpressed. "You waited until after the baby was born to do this?"

He shrugged. "Are you going to help me or not?"

"Can I ask you something?"

Derek looked up from his task of piecing together the crib. "I have a feeling I'll regret this, but...yes. Ask away."

"Do you really think you can just be friends with Emily?" she asked. "Even knowing she doesn't return your feelings?" She'd known him long enough to know that Derek Morgan wasn't a man who opened up easily, tending to keep his feelings close to the chest, so seeing him wearing his heart on his sleeve with Emily wasn't something to take lightly. She couldn't imagine that he'd ever quite recover from Emily turning him down, whether he'd ever allow himself to fall for someone a second time.

He was silent for a long moment before he sighed wearily. He couldn't seem to meet her gaze, playing mindlessly with the screwdriver in his hands to save himself from having to face her scrutiny. "Here's the thing, Jayje... I'm never going to find this again. I watched Mama spend her entire life loving one man, even after he died. You don't find that kind of love twice."

JJ's mouth hung open slightly in surprise at the raw honesty, the vulnerability in his confession. "What are you saying?"

"I think you know exactly what I'm saying," he replied, reluctant to actually come right out and say the words so close to the tip of his tongue.

"So, you're really in love with her? Not just saying it?" she asked. "I mean, no offence, but you're...you." If there was one other thing she knew about Derek Morgan, it was that he kept people at arms' length to avoid having feelings even develop in the first place.

"Touche," he admitted. "But I've been serious about Em since we were kids and that's not about to change." He finally finished screwed the last bolt on the crib together, standing and dusting off his hands on his jeans.

JJ nodded thoughtfully. "So, that's why you're doing all this? Building cribs and everything?"

He shrugged as if it weren't a big deal...even if they both knew it was a really fucking big deal.

JJ had long since gone home, but Derek remained, determined to finish setting up the nursery to his exacting standards. He was in the process of putting Winnie the Pooh decals on the walls when his phone buzzed with an incoming text.

Fishing his phone out of his pocket, he found Emily's name flashing across the screen, unable to help the brilliant smile that crossed his lips from her name alone.

"I'm going to stab the orderly with my pathetic plastic fork if I have to eat one more hospital meal..." the message declared.

He laughed to himself at the threat – mostly because it didn't seem outside the realm of possibility...

"What do you want to eat?" he offered, no stranger to the delights of hospital cuisine.

"A thick juicy burger..." she replied, along with a begging emoji and a drooling emoji. It was quickly followed by a second message, "And so many french fries." Then a third, "And a chocolate milkshake..."

Still grinning to himself, he sent back, "Give me twenty minutes."

Almost immediately, she replied, "My hero!"

When he arrived at the hospital with Emily's requested meal, he found her fast asleep. Shaking his head fondly, he set the food down on the bedside table and settled in the nearby chair to wait for her to wake up.

He was slowly nodding off himself when there was a knock on the door. Looking up, he found a nurse there with baby Clyde in his bassinet.

"Mama sleeping?" the nurse asked.

He nodded, glancing over at Emily and smiling softly.

The nurse came fully into the room then. "Would the proud Papa like to hold Baby?" she asked.

"Oh, I'm not..." he sputtered, cursing internally for having once again found himself in this situation... "I'm just a friend," he finished the denial.

The nurse's cheeks flushed with embarrassment. "I'm sorry – I just assumed. You're here so often and you look at her with so much love, it just seemed like you're the daddy."

"That seems to be a popular misconception lately," he admitted.

The nurse studied him for a few moments as if sizing him up. "You wish you were, though, don't you?"

He shrugged. What could he possibly say?