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Fort Collins, Colorado
December 23
4:38 pm

When we make it to Fort Collins it's still snowing, but not nearly enough to be considered a blizzard. The roads are still icy, though, so Edward's driving pretty slow. I have to admit, he's a pretty impressive driver. He's calm and even-tempered and everything I'm not when behind the wheel.

"Do you ever think about airbags randomly deploying?" I ask.

He turns down the radio, shaking his head. "Uh… no. No, I can't say I have. Has that ever happened to you?"

"No."

"But it's something you think about?"

"Most of my thoughts consist of things that could go wrong. Yes."

"That sounds exhausting," he says seriously. "Maybe you should stop thinking so much."

"That's boring."

He turns his head, staring at me for a few seconds. "You should loosen up. I don't think you've laughed once since I've met you. Or smiled."

"Well you're not very funny," I tease.

He chuckles at this. "Ouch."

"I'm joking." I look straight ahead, biting the inside of my cheek. "I'm just tired. It's been a long day, and we still have at least six hours before we make it to Salt Lake City."

"Fair enough." He yawns. "Oh. Shit. I need to stop for gas."

We pass a few places before he pulls over at a dingy, run-down gas station.

"I'm surprised there aren't boards over the windows," I muse.

He points past me. "There are."

"Don't know how I missed that," I mumble.

I watch him dig through the console and pull out his wallet.

"We didn't really figure this part out yet, but I was thinking I could pay for half the gas… if you want."

Unbuckling his seat belt he says, "That's not necessary."

He gets out of the car, shutting the door. After a second, I get out, too, standing next to him by the pumps.

"Of course it's necessary. It's only fair, Edward."

"You don't have to do that," he argues, scratching along his jaw.

"But I want to."

"I don't want you to, though."

He stares down at me, giving me a stern look. The stupid, skeptical side of me decides to invade my brain. Why would a stranger offer to give me a ride—a free ride—and not expect anything in return?

"You're not, like," I drop my voice to a whisper, "expecting to be paid in… sexual favors, right?"

He groans, dropping his head in his hands. "Jesus. If it's going to keep you from thinking terrible things about me, you can pay for half the gas, okay?"

I think I pissed him off.

"Sorry. That was a bad joke," I backtrack.

"You didn't sound like you were joking."

"Okay, so I wasn't. I was pretty convinced for a second that you were going to make me give you road head or something."

He lets out a humorless laugh, then swipes his card. "You're insane."

I'm not going to argue with that. "So I can pay for gas, yeah?"

"Yep. You can fill up next time we need to stop or whatever."

"Okay, good." I take a few slow steps backward. "I'm gonna… go…" I point toward the store.

When I'm inside, I head straight to the back to use the bathroom. I try opening the door, but it's locked. I knock a few times, and when I don't hear anyone answer, I make my way toward the counter. The clerk, a middle-aged woman, is standing there, playing Solitaire.

"Is there a key for the bathroom, or…"

"Bathroom is for customers only," she replies, not looking up from her cards.

"I am a customer. I'm with that guy." I point outside to where Edward's pumping gas, but she doesn't glance up as she hands me a plunger with a key attached to the top of the handle. "Can I have a key without feces on it? Please?"

"Take it or leave it," she grumbles.

Cringing, I grab it from her. I use the bathroom as quickly as I can, and make an attempt to not touch more than I have to. When I'm done, I return the plunger back to the clerk, then head outside.

"You chose the sketchiest place ever," I tell Edward when I'm back in the car.

"Cheap gas."

"The key to the bathroom was attached to a plunger. A used plunger." His stare is blank, so I decide to spell it out for him. "There was shit on it."

He laughs extremely hard at this.

And I guess if he were the one who had to deal with it, I'd be laughing, too. But he wasn't. So I'm not.

"Lighten up," he says, smiling. "That shit's pretty funny."

"Witty."

"Shit happens, Bella. Shit. Happens."

The corners of my mouth twitch, but I try to hold back.

Fine. He's pretty funny, but it's not like I'm going to admit that to him.

Nudging my arm with his elbow, he says, "That wasn't a smile, was it?"

"No."

"Okay, good," he replies. "Wouldn't want you to lose your composure."

"That's not gonna be a problem."

Thaaaaaank y'all for reading. Seriously. Next update should be tomorrow.