Author Note: Part of the Christmas Explosion. Merry Christmas!
I do not own The Simpson.
Enjoy!
"And here is where you would be sleeping tonight," said Tailed Milhouse.
They opened the door and Milhouse found a massive room with a bed.
"Wow," said Milhouse.
"Yes, wow," said Tailed Milhouse. "I'm going to one of my 11 rooms"
"Wait," said Milhouse. "How did you get girls to like you?"
"I guess, I have some self-respect," said Tailed Milhouse. "That and I don't dress like you. I'll lend you some clothes if you like"
And then he walked away, leaving Milhouse stunned.
He was shocked to find out his cooler self wasn't an asshole.
#Moe house#
"And this is where you'll, be sleeping," said Moe, as everybody came into the building attached to the house.
The guest wing.
The floor was luxurious, the wallpaper was nice, there was a vending machine, there were beds and light, there were doors like a bathroom and a master bedroom.
"This is the Guest wing?" said tailed Marge.
Moe added. "This place is also stocked full of food so if you get hungry in the middle of the night, there is plenty"
Then he said.
"Well, see you all tomorrow," said Moe. "Have a nice rest and goodbye"
And then his family turned and closed the door.
Moe kissed his wife and then he personally helped his kids to bed.
He tucked them in, he read tailed Maggie a bedtime story, he read a tailed Lisa an inspiring women tale and then juggled his tailed boys, he didn't stop juggling them until they were tired and dizzy.
"Goodnight," he said, to all of them and then he received a kiss from his wife and both of them got for ready for bed and headed to their bed in their PJs, they locked all the bedroom doors, closed all the places to get money and turned on their fanciest inside and out security system.
Nothing was getting stolen outside or inside of the halls.
And then all of them laid down and slept.
They all believed that they would get to sleep in, get a relaxing sleep.
However, everybody woke up to the chaos that was The Simpsons.
Everybody was woken up by barking and cat cries.
What?
Moe threw on a robe and opened the door, while his wife on in concern.
He saw the Simpsons dog and cat running through the house and Lisa trying to keep them quiet.
"What in the world?" Said Moe.
"Oh, hi. Mr Szyslak" said Lisa nervously.
The cat then scratched a pole.
That was one demanded property too many.
"House, detain the animals and bring them downstairs. Bring the guest in the living room and block out the noise so it doesn't reach my family" Moe ordered.
"Yes, Master," said the house.
Suddenly robotic hands came down and grabbed all of the Simpsons and the pets who panicked.
He then walked to the living room as they were all lifted and sat on the couch.
He stood before the Simpsons with the pets still held behind him.
He said. "Can somebody please explain to me, what is this?"
He pointed to the animals behind them.
"There's our pets which we stowed away in a box." Said Bart.
"Were really sorry, Mr szyslak" said Marge. "But we couldn't put the dog in a kennel since everybody in our town is here and there was nobody to take care of our cat"
"We had no choice but to bring them here but we were hoping to get some help here." Said Lisa. "Or better yet, the family we stay with, love animals"
"Well, you should have told me this yesterday," he said. "My house is not designed for a cat or a dog in my mind. The only pets I allow in my house is either a fish, a hamster or a tortoise. But a dog and a cat? Hell, no. I don't want them peeing on my nice green lawn, I don't want them scratching or bitting my house, I don't want to find shedding everywhere, I don't want my bathrooms and carpet ruined by a pet and I don't want to hear a bark or a mew when I and my family ate trying to sleep. Do you know how much pet services are in one of the most expensive places in America? A good 1000 bucks and that's just the low end because people love their pets."
They were all shocked.
"1000 bucks? That's so expensive!" Said Homer, despite being the very same man who spent a thousand on in-game items not that long ago.
"You know what? I'll pay for the pet services. I just want them out of my house as fast as possible" he said, to them. "I haven't seen my family in weeks. I want to relax, spend some time with them and not have to look at animals destroying my property. Is it too much for a married guy to ask? Just watch tv, while the animal carers get here"
He walked back up the stairs and a moment later the tv turned on, while he called and had the stay, charged to his account.
He let the carers enter his property hours later and he dumped the pets onto them and they walked away since he had stated, that they were surprise pets he did not want.
He sat beside his wife.
#Downstairs#
The Simpsons eyes widened when they saw the man who just went upstairs on TV.
Handsome tailed Moe sat on a chair with a blue backdrop and to the side, we're the words 'Moe Szyslak. Popular Hollywood actor'.
"How, am I still so good looking?" Said Moe. "I really don't know. Usually, in my kind of work, your looks flatline around age 25, then the younger people get the spotlight. People like to see young skin. If they see one grey hair, you're instantly cast as a father, a grandfather or a bitter old person. But for me, my face hasn't actually changed since I was 20, apparently, I look better with grey hair according to my fan mail. And boy is that a can of worms that I don't want to get into. But sex pays the bills."
"Oh, my god. It's tailed, Moe!" Said Lisa.
The whole Simpsons stared.
"So what made you decide to appear on the Krusty show?" Said the interviewer, as the family was shocked.
"Well, I saw my kids watching the show once," he said. "I sat down with them and realised this guy was actually pretty funny. I was laughing with my kids when those two-sided jokes hit. So I sat down with this guy and he just made me laugh and laugh. The man was a comedic genius. I just had to be on his show. When I left, I had a little fun with my kids because they weren't sure if they just saw Daddy on Krusty. Those were a fun few days. Now Krusty sometimes works for Hollywood in the comedy department and I'm really happy that Krusty has come up in the world since then, the man deserves every comedy trophy"
The family kept staring.
"So what are you doing now?" Said the interviewer. "As one of the biggest actors in the world, you must have several projects lined up"
"Well, I have been signed on, for another season of birds," he said. "I'm doing a few commercials here and there. And I'm in the final talks for a new movie, I'm interested in. But at this point, I can't reveal the plot. It's a million-dollar script. I can't spoil that"
Just then the real man walked past the room on the other side, behind him were the kids.
They tailed family walked to the kitchen and he began making breakfast.
Moe put on the stove and opened the fridge while his kids sat down.
He sang. "Sit down at my table. Put your mind at ease. If you relax, it would enable me, to do anything I can please"
His voice was amazing, not at all like that cracking voice.
He used his skills as an actor, his tail and his control of the house to perform while he made breakfast for the kids.
They looked to be having fun.
Tailed Marge came in and kissed her husband on the cheek.
She didn't look bitter at all in the mornings.
"Well good morning," Moe said, to her smiling, before he said. "Sit down and let me prepare a dish to tantalise your tastebuds"
He was faster, more rhythmic, he was rolling and cutting, then placing it in a fast oven.
When he stopped, he put the plates on the table and then began rolling out the breakfast.
"Breakfast, Chinese style," he said.
"It looks incredible," said tailed Marge and those peeking could agree.
"And now to clean and take out the garbage," he said, as he got some out cleaning spray and whips as the family dug in.
Marge 'ooed', a husband who did things before being asked?
"Oh, Moe, your so wonderful," said tailed Marge.
"No, you're so wonderful," he said, to her. "If you hadn't picked me up that night, I would have gone down that awful path and partied, smoked, and drank my looks and money away. A family has given me a purpose to do better in life. I mean, I could never look my family in the eye again, If I ever came home drunk."
And then he walked out and took out the garbage and said hi to the friendly neighbour.
The neighbours and him were good without any bullying going on.
Moe went back and took a few things and then the family helped to wash up.
They were in sync.
"Let's go hang out at the backyard pool," said Moe. "Let's have some quality time together. But of course, we wait an hour before getting in"
"Yeah, pool!" All the kids said.
They rushed upstairs to get their swim kits and floaties.
They ignored the Simpsons because this was family time.
Moe changed into more of a beachwear with swim shorts on and held all the kids and began to juggle them even the baby showing incredible strength as he headed to the back door.
The children were laughing as they were being juggled.
They went to the backyard and began enjoying the sun, the super soakers were out and the beach ball was released.
Then they began to get into the water.
"Marge," said Moe to his tailed wife and then he took off his shirt revealing his hot six-pack body. "This is the father of your kids."
"Ooh," said tailed Marge and none tailed Marge, without her realising it.
When she did, she saw her children and her husband looking at her.
She was sorry but who knew her own selfishness for Marriage was on display right now.
Moe got in and began to playfight with all his kids but Maggie.
They could see his glorious, not bolding body from here.
"Take this!" He said lightly hitting with a plush cylinder.
Everybody was smiling.
"Dad, your the best!" said Hugo.
"I'm only the best because I have four little joys in my life and your one of them," he said, ruffling Hugo hair lovingly and not chocking him.
"Dad, can I go for College?" Said, Tailed Lisa. "They said, I can try for the exam, but I would need consent and money"
"Well, if you want to college, I'll support you all the way," said Moe.
"Thank you, dad," said tailed Lisa.
"College? At 8? Nerd!" said tailed Bart and Bart.
"So you don't want tickets to the X-games with Hugo?" Said Moe.
Tailed Bart changed his tune fast and said. "Hail, College. Praise the college."
"Marge are getting in?" Said Moe.
Tailed Marge shook her head but then he got out, water beautifully dripped from his body.
He picked her up while she was distracted, he twirled her around and leapt into the pool with her.
"No, M-Splash!" Tailed Marge began but it was too late.
They both came up and she smacked him, playfully.
Then they stared at each and their tails wrapped around each other and then they kissed.
Deep and passionate.
"Eh, get a room," said Hugo.
They broke up and Moe said. "Are you sure? That's what made you"
Hugo face flamed.
The two adults laughed while the kids looked uncomfortable.
The Simpsons stared out of the window.
"We're so happy..." Began Lisa. "And it's all because Mom never married Dad"
How could Homer not feel incompetent and a failure, seeing how happy an alternate version of his family, was without him?
Everybody in Springfield was feeling, how happy their counterparts were.
Who knew that certain events that can't be changed in their lives, would have such drastically positive effects.
However, not everybody was happy.
A tailored Homer paced in his terrible apartment in Shelbyville.
His wall was filled with Merge.
He had found Marge, and he was not going to let her go.
He would have her by any means necessary.
Even if he had to kill her current husband to do so.