CARPE NOCTEM / DEEDS OVER WORDS / CH. 9
It's been half an hour since Bellatrix left the two teenagers alone, not caring a single bit about the potential consequences of their unsupervised practice, which they, naturally, had made one hell of a use of—id est, irresponsibly hazarding with a Legilimency spell without any adult to administer the situation.
They had been talking theory, analysing the spell Draco had already got all figured out, thanks to aunt Bella's endeavour. Surely, they were supposed to keep working on Occlumency, but since Hermione understood everything it took to shield herself, it had become impossible to get through her barriers. And given they still had some hours to kill, the girl suggested to switch the roles.
Fully recovered from her disappointment earlier, she was shifting on her feet, restless like a little puppy. "Okay, I get it, but please, can I finally try now?"
"Fine," Draco grunted, his tone slowly changing into a warning, "but may Merlin be with you if—!"
"Don't worry! I promise I won't say a word about anything I'll see! Besides, who would I tell?"
Draco nodded hesitantly. Granger was right, it wasn't like she had a sleeve full of friends waiting on hand for the latest gossips about his life. "Fine... but remember to stay focused! I don't want to be stuck with you in my head for the rest of my life!"
"That's not even possible! The Great Book of Ch—" Hermione started but stopped upon noticing the expression forming on his face. "Okay, sorry."
Draco gave her one last sour look, secretly hoping she'd change her mind, but her eyes stayed determined and he knew that the battle was lost. Taking a deep breath, he wiggled his legs to release the anxiety. "I cannot believe I'm letting you do this..."
"Trust me, everything's going to be all right!" Hermione smiled, keeping her excitement at the minimum. "So... are you ready or do you want me to...?"
"Just do it, or I'll change my mind," the boy gulped, visibly uncomfortable.
"Okay, okay." Hermione locked her eyes with his, focusing all her attention on performing the spell properly. "Right... One... two... three... Legilimens!"
A whirlpool of smoke pulled her into the depths of a continuum, but this time it wasn't her territory she could wander around. Even though equally peculiar, it wasn't like her experience at all. Draco's thoughts were moving much more languidly, similarly to a slow-motioned movie. Hermione thought it must have been due to the fact she wasn't experienced enough to send them passing the way Bellatrix did.
She tried to be polite, not really focusing on any particular bubbles of moments, just objectively perceiving the mixture of sounds, feelings, and colours presenting itself to her. She was doing an excellent job not prying into the private thoughts of Draco Malfoy until... until her focus shifted on its own accord, forcing her to dive into a fume of bright orange colour, filling her mind with an alien memory.
A little toddler-Draco appeared, sitting on his aunt's lap, beaming with joy. He was reaching his tiny hands up towards her hair, giggling as it tickled his snowy pristine skin. Bellatrix leaned in, planting quick playful kisses on his cheeks, making him laugh even harder.
"Yooou, little widdle-waddle, what's so funny?!" she let out in a baby voice, tickling his little belly until he gave in completely, leaning back, his head hanging down her knees.
"Noooo!" Draco squeaked in between the laughs. "Pweaaase!"
Bellatrix giggled as well, taking his clenched fists into her palms, dragging him back up.
The little guy steadied himself, his laughter quenching, turning into a wide smile. "You awe the best in the whowe wooowd!" Toddler-Draco announced, putting his arms around her neck, losing them in a mane of shining curls, gazing into her eyes with pure child's love. "I'm going to mawy you when I gwow up!"
Bellatrix let out a hearty laugh, throwing her head back.
"Don't waugh, auntie, I weally wove you!"
"Too bad, little buddy, she's already taken." A man with a blurred face walked into the room, making Draco gaze grumpily at him.
"No! She's mine!"
That's when the memory stopped and Hermione found herself being pushed out of Draco's mind with a raging force.
"Damn it!" the boy cursed, his face madder red. He was looking anywhere but at Hermione, who, on the other hand, couldn't distinguish between her own mixed up feelings.
The whole memory had almost knocked the very breath out of her because it was simply impossible to imagine the woman being so... sweet and loving—and yet, there she was: face blooming with a genuine smile, sending a strange kind of warmth travelling through Hermione's chest.
A small blush crept into the girl's cheeks. "Ehm," she cleared her throat, aiming for her voice to sound as casual as possible, "I think it worked."
Draco gave her a quick look. "I don't wanna hear anything from you!"
"Oh, come on! I'm not going to laugh at you. It's just a memory! You were tiny and... so adorable, may I add," she said, unable to keep herself from smiling.
"You really are a trained professional at making people awkwardly mad." Draco frowned, the colour still lingering in his cheeks.
"I'll always have your back, you know that."
"Unbelievable..." Raising an eyebrow, he smirked against his will, letting the girl know his uncomfortable feelings were slowly easing into the oblivion. There was nothing to be ashamed of, after all. He had been just a child and he loved his aunt dearly, that much he could remember. She was always the one for the crazy stuff, responsible for all of his childhood adventures.
"So," Hermione cut through his inner monologue, the itching question on the tip of her tongue, "who was that man at the end? If you don't mind me asking, of course."
Sitting down on the floor, Draco's upper lip curled in distaste. "Not at all. That was just auntie's husband."
Oh.
For reasons unknown, Hermione's stomach sank, reflecting all the traces of her friend's expression.
"Where is he now?" she asked, her voice strangely distant.
Draco shrugged, gazing down at his black brogans. "No idea, home probably, Lestrange Manor."
"You don't really get along, do you?" Hermione asked carefully, sitting down opposite to her friend.
"Guess you could say that."
The taste of a slowly approaching melancholia brushed against the girl's skin. "Yeah, I could see why." She smirked, trying to disperse the gloomy feeling.
Draco's eyes widened, his cheeks immediately turning pink again. "Hey, stop it! I don't feel that way anymore!"
"I wasn't suggesting... "
"Whatever." The boy leapt to his feet. "I just don't like the man, all right? He's not my cup of tea."
"Surely he's not. I'd never guess you to be that type, anyway." Hermione went on, succeeding in winding the boy up.
"Ha, ha! Hilarious, Granger!" Draco let out sarcastically. "If you're so eager on the topic, though, how come I haven't seen anyone near you ever since Krum? Not counting Weasley, of course." He struck back with an equal force.
"I don't know what you're talking about." She smoothed her shirt nonchalantly. "I think we should either carry on with the practice or go back to our rooms, it's getting late."
"Oh, no! We're not dropping the subject!"
"Yes, we are!"
"So it's true!" Draco sneered awkwardly, looking her up and down.
"What is true?" Hermione frowned, already regretting her teasing game.
"You and Weasley."
"But sure, I've been secretly dating him for months, glad you finally figured it out."
"Are you seriously not telling me?" Draco asked, a shade of curiosity gracing his face. "Isn't there anyone you like?"
"Ehm... Draco..." she blushed, gulping. They've never talked about this subject before. Ever. "I... don't know what to say."
"The name would be enough."
She let out a deep breath, thinking hard how to get out of the situation. There really wasn't anyone on her mind, but admitting that to someone who might potentially like her was just too cruel. However, giving away a false hope would be equally heartless, too.
Okay, let's try this.
"I have to focus on studying now," she dropped diplomatically, "I don't really have time for boys."
"Girls, then?"
"I beg your pardon?" She raised her eyebrows, making Draco laugh.
"What? I'm just checking."
"Should check with yourself first," Hermione retorted, her eyes smirking.
"What's that supposed to mean?!"
"I don't know... Zabini, maybe," she let out, bursting into laughter, running towards the door, having a red-faced Draco closely behind her.
"You'll pay for this, Granger!"
Another morning slowly approached, waking Hermione a good deal earlier than she was accustomed to. She was lying in her bed, eyes travelling across the carved ceiling, wondering why there was an anxiety biting her stomach sore like an annoyed bird...
No! The O.W.L.s!
In a second, the girl jumped out of the bed, throwing the covers aside, hissing as her feet collided with the cold wooden floor. She was making her way towards the wardrobe, ignoring any fashion statements as she grabbed the first thing she could touch and pulled it on over her pyjamas.
She hurried to the door, stumbling upon a "Common Magical Ailments And Afflictions" that had fallen from her bed. "Damn it!" she cursed, picking the book up.
She practically flew out of her room, tripping again, but this time it was her own foot making her fight for balance."Unbelievable," she muttered under her breath, astonished by her own clumsiness.
The corridor was still dark, illuminated by the dim light of the torches that were casting shadows on the sleeping occupants of the portraits. Hermione didn't waste time observing the surroundings though. She went sprinting, heading straight down the marble stairs, skipping them three at a time. Jumping from the last one, she turned left, flying through the wooden door and stumbling upon the spiral staircase hidden behind them.
Hermione rushed up, completely oblivious to the fact it was still too early for any mail.
A cold morning breeze hit her coral cheeks as she braked at the entrance. Bending over, she touched her knees, taking the air in for all she was worth. Her heart was going mad inside her chest, dreading the results, which surely couldn't have been that bad, but still... what if? Hermione was almost sure Anthony Goldstein had done a better job with a Riddikulus spell than her. Much better.
A sudden rustling of feathers made her flinch, tearing her inner debate apart. She straightened her back, completely freezing as her eyes landed on a dark figure standing still with her arms folded across her chest.
"Merlin!" Hermione choked out of her. "I'm so sorry, I didn't...!"
"What are you doing here?" A tired voice laced with a hint of surprise escaped Bellatrix Lestrange's lips.
Hermione cleared her throat, blaming the running for her heart's unceasing thumping. "The O.W.L.s results are supposed to get delivered today, ma'am."
Bellatrix came out of the shadows, the weariness that was radiating from her words reflected on her face in the same manner. Having a slightly distorted view, Hermione couldn't swear to it, but the dark circles blooming under the heavy eyes were anything but a play of light, suggesting the woman probably hadn't gotten much sleep.
"So?" A raspy voice interrupted Hermione's thoughts.
The girl gripped her upper arm, gazing at the witch. "I just thought I'd go check."
Bellatrix narrowed her eyes but then turned around walking towards a Eurasian eagle-owl waiting patiently in the open window. "Sweetheart, it's five fifteen. Important letters such as O.W.L. results are always delivered around eight o'clock at the earliest."
Hermione pursed her lips together, eyes darting towards the hands trying to loosen the small scroll of parchment attached to the bird's talon. "I thought, just in case. Well, I— I better be going then."
"Actually, since I have you here," Bellatrix had finally untied the letter, turning back to Hermione, "I planned on seeing you today, anyway."
"You did?" Hermione gulped, unable to tear her eyes from the smile forming on the woman's lips.
"I wanted to ask how the practice went yesterday," she explained, putting the parchment into her pockets, waving the owl off with a quick motion of her hand.
Hermione flinched as the majestic bird spread its wings and took off towards the aurora sky, leaving without any reply.
Hearing a soft cough, her eyes snapped back to the witch, who was clearly displeased the girl wasn't paying her any attention. "I'm sorry," she murmured, "I— it went really well. Draco was trying to break into my mind but wasn't really successful. Not once, actually." Hermione shrugged, trying to sound modest despite her own pride.
Seating herself down on the stone windowsill, Bellatrix crossed her legs, a smirk playing on her lips. "My, my... aren't you a bright little one." She locked her eyes with Hermione's, the intensity almost tangible. The young witch, sensing the intention, quickly put up invisible walls around her thoughts, not that keen to fail right now.
Bellatrix's smile widened. "Bright indeed... but tell me," she tilted her head, adding conspiratorially, "is that all you did yesterday?"
Feeling a sudden rush of blood coming to her cheeks, Hermione averted her gaze, biting her inner cheek.
"Oh, but I didn't mean it like that, what do you think of me, for Merlin's sake, girl?!"
"But," Hermione quickly looked back up, locking her eyes with the smirking woman. "I wasn't... I just.." she kept stammering, unable to form a proper sentence. What was it about this witch, making her so... not herself.
"Come now, I was just joking." Bellatrix chuckled, shaking her head, the thick curls bouncing against her shoulders as the crispy breeze coming from behind her blew right through them.
Suppressing a shudder, Hermione's arms erupted in goosebumps when the wind advanced towards her, bringing a soft perfumed scent along the way.
The woman raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. "So, no forbidden spells? Not one?"
"I," the girl started hesitantly, not sure what would happen if she came out with the truth. There was still a trust issue they needed to work on.
"I won't be mad, I wasn't any different back in the day, after all." Bellatrix winked, leaning in.
"Well," Hermione began, clearly not persuaded, "We..."
"Yes?"
"We practised a Legilimency spell. I mean, Draco taught me how to do it and I... I used it on him," the girl finished, embarrassed as if she'd done some horrible crime. Biting her lip, she was awaiting... well, anything really. Looking up, she froze, her eyes widening. The dark witch really wasn't mad. Actually, she was... was that disappointment?
"Is that it? I thought you'd at least duel a little. What a shame you wasted such an opportunity, miss Goody-Goody!" Bellatrix curled her lips downwards.
Hermione didn't know how to react because this attitude was surely the least of her anticipations.
"Well, too bad," Bellatrix carried on, exhaling loudly, "so you killed the time, literally, trying out the spell and when you couldn't do it, you..."
"But I did! I managed to do it!" Hermione cut her off eagerly, blushing as the woman raised her eyebrow. "Sorry... I didn't mean to interrupt you."
The dark witch kept looking at her for a while. "You performed the Legilimency spell?"
Hermione nodded, putting her arms around herself. Standing there without any movement wasn't doing her any good.
"What did you see?" Bellatrix asked, genuinely interested.
"Ehm..." The rosy cheeks of Hermione's turned a few shades darker. She was starting to get really mad at her groundless body reactions. If she had to count the times she had spent blushing during her entire life, she'd bet ten galleons the majority of it would lock around this summer.
She gave the woman a quick look. "You," she murmured, immediately averting her gaze.
"Me?" Hermione heard after a while, an amused voice painting the atmosphere with clear disbelief. Her eyes snapped back to the witch leaning against the frame of the window. "And what exactly was I doing in my nephew's memories, may I ask?"
Gulping, Hermione bit her lip. "You were playing with him."
"What details! I'm sure I've never heard such a complex description before!" Bellatrix clasped her hands together.
Cursing mentally, the girl tried again, "Draco was around four or five years old. He was sitting on your lap, playing with your hair, announcing he was going to marry you once he's old enough, but then your husband came in, saying you— you were already taken." She spilt out in one breath, turning even more crimson, but this time refused to look away.
Bellatrix's smile faltered. "Oddly enough, that really does sound familiar," she let out after a while, her face painted with a pensive look, "how many tries did it take you?"
"One."
The woman slowly stood up, folding her arms. "Are you telling me the truth?"
Hermione only nodded, rubbing her arms. The chill was already starting to bite her bones.
"Surprising," Bellatrix whispered, her eyes unreadable like everything else about her, "most of the people would fail to perform the spell until their fourth or fifth try."
"Oh..." The girl's cheeks let out another wave of warmth, making Bellatrix chuckle.
"You're so timid, so easily distracted," the witch pointed in a silky voice, her eyes travelling over Hermione, who'd rather see herself in hell because the redness in her face was anything but leaving.
"That won't get you far in life. Believe me."
Hermione frowned, wishing to tell her she was anything but timid or easily distracted. She was brave, focused! She wanted to tell her, to defend herself, to prove that she was strong—and just like that, frustrated with herself for her lack of muchness, she let her emotions spill.
"I'm not any of those things," she declared, wishing her voice, at least for once in her life, wouldn't sound so sugary sweet.
Bellatrix took a moment but then stepped out towards Hermione, having her back away immediately. The woman laughed. "Deeds over words, deary," she let out, shaking her head.
Fine.
An anger bit Hermione's nerves, making her stroll back into the room and suddenly there was a wand in her hand. Her feet moved further, stopping just mere steps away from the witch. Her eyes found the black depths and for a single moment, she could enjoy the surprised look imprinted on the arrogant but pretty face. Very pretty, actually. Not even that undeniable tiredness could take away from the fact.
Wait...
This moment of confusion cost Hermione everything. Maybe she really was easily distracted after all.
Taking advantage, Bellatrix's sharp intuition knew exactly what to do as she inched closer towards the girl, licking her lips. "Not trying to bite off more than we can chew, are we?" she whispered, moving even closer, getting a perfect view of every little freckle planted on the girl's face.
Exactly as she thought, Muddy was dumbstruck with fear, unable to form any reaction. "Not so brave, now." Bellatrix lifted her chin, a smile spreading across her face, not really helping Hermione to break away from her trance.
Oh, how easy it would be to curse the little one—just for fun. Unfortunately, given the recent events, the girl's mind was too precious to play games with like that.
The paradox, though, made her want it even more, tempting her to take out her wand and... No! The gathered excitement quickly turned into a huge bulk of annoyance, wanting to break free.
"I'll give you a piece of advice. Girl to girl," the dark witch let out sweetly after a while. "Benevolence is not in my nature, so if you're not willing to fight or do anything at all, don't test my limits. It might not end up pretty." She raised an eyebrow, slowly backing away.
Hermione stayed glued to the spot, ready to spill the tears of humiliation.
Bellatrix, composing herself, softened her tone. "Look, I understand it's not easy to get criticised, but doing stupid things without logical thought won't make people change their mind. Remember that next time you get frustrated trying to impress someone with your bravado."
"I am so sorry... I don't know what I was thinking." Hermione whispered, feeling as low as never.
"Fine." Bellatrix pursed her lips together, swallowing the urge to throw up. Surely the girl wouldn't expect any pity from her—that'd go far beyond her acting skills.
"I got so annoyed, because I know I..." A single tear escaped from underneath Hermione's eyelashes but quickly vanished under the quick motion of her hand.
"You don't need to explain yourself." Bellatrix averted her gaze, folding her arms.
"I do! I was disrespectful! I don't even know what I was trying to prove!" Hermione blurted, throwing her hand in the air.
"Look, girl. No, look at me!" Bellatrix suddenly raised her voice. "You are young. Of course, there's a lot you'd want to prove. You may not even know all the reasons behind it—and surprise, there's actually more to come, ready to frustrate the hell out of you, giving you anxiety, headaches, but that's what makes these years beautiful! What makes the life worth living.
You should be angry, you should rage and be disrespectful—not to me, of course, but there are others willing to take that," Bellatrix paused, planting a hesitant smile on Hermione's face but cancer on her own brain. It clenched once she understood what was she actually doing. And it surely wasn't a part of the plan.
'I was supposed to be tolerant, not kind.'
Hermione, seeing struggle painting the woman's face, frowned. "Is everything all right?"
"Of course it is, why shouldn't it be?" Bellatrix barked schizophrenically, freezing the warmth spreading through Hermione's stomach. "I just didn't realise how much time I've wasted," she muttered, moving towards the exit.
She paused at the door, giving Hermione a look full of distaste. "I'm not an expert, but I don't think you're wearing that the right way." She nodded at the girl's shirt before disappearing into the darkness.
Confused Hermione looked down, realising she was sporting her top upside down, having all the messy seams on display.
Burying her face in her palms, she wondered whether this day could get any worse.
1. Please bear with my confused Hermione. Give her some time to figure herself out. I promise she won't be such a crybaby forever! :)
2. I could not resist letting baby Draco have a crush on his auntie! Tom Felton himself gave me the idea with his crush on Helena.
3. Wave goodbye Bella's point of view!
Of course, all my love to you for your amazing amazing reviews! Thank you! It's the best motivation!