Beta: paleseptember10
Epilogue
2023
"Goat cheese? Ew!" Anastasia spat out her mouthful over the railing not even bothered to watch which unfortunate fish swallowed it as if it was a treasure.
Rewrapping the sandwich that Gail had meticulously prepared for their day out on the yacht, she dropped it back into the basket, letting it slip from her fingertips as if it was some moldy brie that still brought bad taste into her mouth.
"Christian!" She whined, stomping her feet with her hands on her waist. "I thought I made it very clear that goat cheese is banned in the house."
"It is. I have been adhering to that rule obediently."
"Then why does this have goat cheese inside?" She pointed to the only messily wrapped sandwich in the container.
His gaze followed her pointy finger and landed on the basket that was filled with more than just sandwiches. The one on the very top was the only one that had been opened, and he laughed.
"Baby, Gail made enough food to feed double the amount of people on this boat, and you just had to pick up the one sandwich specifically made for your father."
"This is for my Dad?" She scrunched up her nose, only to make Christian chortle harder. She was too adorable.
"Your Dad's favorite cheese is goat cheese isn't it?" He lifted a brow knowing he was right because he had been repeatedly called old the handful of times he had them in his parents' place. Him eating goat cheese was already a rarity but Ana just wouldn't let go of the fact that he even tolerated the taste.
"Old men always prefer food with disgusting fillings." She retched dramatically and her hands began to dig through the rest of the food basket. "Why can't you guys like something normal? Like jam, or peanut butter, or just normal cheese."
Christian laughed as he bit back a comment about her attitude lately.
"Did you find yours? I think it has your name on it, too."
"Really? Where? I don't see it." Her digging sped up as she was almost tempted to flip the entire basket upside down just so she could empty all the contents in it. "Why didn't you take it out? I'm going to ruin all the packaging."
"I was joking, baby," he laughed. Moving her to the side by her waist, he stepped in front of the container and picked out another tinfoil package. He opened a corner and peered inside, checking the contents before handing it to her. "Try this one."
She eyed him suspiciously.
"I swear there's no more goat cheese. Just in that one," he pointed to the discarded half-bitten food on the side, while internally debating how he should break this to his father-in-law. He knew it was now inevitable that he would have an accident and end up in the ocean chasing his boat as it sped away. "What, don't trust me?"
"Well, I do, but I don't want mayonnaise."
He looked inside again and saw the white sauce stuck to the inside of the bread. Just to make sure, he sniffed it and realized that it really was mayonnaise.
"Since when are you so picky about the sauce?" He jested, picking out another one. "Peanut butter and jelly?" He offered, deciding to eat the one with the mayo himself, or if Ray wanted it, he could have it.
"I'm not, I just don't like the smell these days."
He lifted a brow that Ana failed to notice. "Right," he murmured under his breath.
Today was looking to be his worst day. Not only was he supposed to come clean to his in-law but his wife's behavior would just make his gesture seem like he had other purposes.
"Are you hungry?" He asked as he watched Ana devour the bread in her hand. She stood next to the railing, her hair swept away by the wind, and she was trying to look casual but he could already see half of the sandwich was gone.
"I'm snacky."
"You could've had the fruit, you know?" He prompted, mimicking her move as he rested his elbows on the railing next to her. His head turned in her direction as he gazed at the side of her face, mesmerized by her perfectly sculpted cheekbones and her button nose.
He thought he had this portrait ingrained in his memory, committed to the shrine that was built for her, but it was only until now could he actually see the exhaustion reflected in her eyes. Even after three years of reflection and maturing, he still failed to think of the easiest solution to her psychological well being. She was stressed, had been for a long time, and he knew that yet he never knew how to help her or what to do.
Not until she spelled it out to him.
He watched her intently, trying to come up with words that could ease her worry or let her know that it wasn't his intention to let her down again. He should've offered to talk to Ray a long time ago. No, he should've pushed her to reach out to her father when she so desperately needed the support that he couldn't give her.
He was too selfish, thinking that he could be enough for her. Ironically, she was more than enough to him but he was the first person to turn away the moment things got rough.
"Christian?" She waved her hand before his eyes, catching his attention. "You're staring at me. Is there something on my face?"
"No," he shook his head immediately. "You're perfect."
She frowned at his odd comment not that he didn't compliment her enough, but the timing of this one told her that she had just caught him in his head over-thinking about the tiniest stuff that he shouldn't focus on.
"What are you doing?" She feigned an attempt to dodge away from him as he inched closer, his arms slowly going around her torso as his body covered hers. He buried his face into her hair and pampered her neck with kisses.
"You're glowing," he crooned in her ear.
"No, I'm not. It's the sun, everyone glows under the sun." She craned her neck looking at him with an incredulous expression as if he was crazy.
"Of course," he chuckled appeasingly, stealing a kiss from her pouting lips. "I'm biased."
She rolled her eyes at him, but before she could produce some witty comeback, his hands cupped her breasts. She gasped loudly as he gave them a hard, firm squeeze.
"They are heavy," he goaded in her ear, still kneading them.
Her breath hitched when he pulled her cup down and his fingers snatched her nipple. She wanted to swat his hands away and warn him of her father's presence, but his hands felt so good.
"And they are most definitely more sensitive," he nibbled down the side of her neck and paid attention to her shoulder, taking advantage of her strapless top.
"Christian…" she whimpered, her hand gripped the railing in front of her and her thighs clenched together as she felt wetness pooled at her core.
Encouraged by her moans, his hand traveled down. His thumb rubbed against her belly button through the fabric of her clothing as the rest of his fingers moved further south.
"I think I know why you're glowing."
"Hmm… Christian, stop," she squirmed in his arms.
"Your sandwich is going to fall, baby," he taunted, his hand slipped to the hem of her shirt and was about to snake beneath it when she swatted him away with as much confidence as she could muster. Her weak swat was probably her body betraying her mind but she couldn't help it. "We don't want to waste food now would we?"
"Christian, my Dad…"
"Is still chatting with Mac."
"Didn't he leave already?"
"He's about to when Ray caught him, and apparently they were talking about the best fishing spot."
"So you think you can just grope me in broad daylight with my father just standing on the other end of the boat?"
"I can rope you downstairs and we can do more than groping in broad daylight," he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, his hand still resting on her chest as his fingers deftly fixed her bra.
"You're going to go talk to my Dad with that tent pitched in your pants?" She rubbed her ass into his pelvis, feeling him flex against her.
"I was hoping that you could help me with the situation. Or I can help you, right now." He whispered the last bit with emphasis. His hands shifted to her hips conveniently rubbing his palm over her hip bone in the sensual way that only he could master. "Surely you still remembered the time I fingered you in the elevator, and that wasn't the only time it happened, though it was probably the only time in a fully filled one."
She flushed instantly at that memory, and his grin widened at her display of shyness.
"I have a theory," he said, switching to another tactic to seduce her.
"Oh yeah, about what?" She arched a perfect brow expressing her disbelief.
"I think that test lied."
"What test?" She frowned at his overly careful articulation of speech.
"I think you're actually pregnant," he continued to finish his thought.
She snorted. "Don't get my hopes up like this, Grey. It's not funny."
"Do you want me to prove it to you?"
"Prove it, how?"
"Oh, let me give you a list. You taste different," he licked the shell of her ear as his hand cupped her core over her pants, his thumb teased her clit, more like hovering over it but not applying the amount of pressure that she craved. "You feel different," his other hand traced her cleavage, ghosting just around her mounds. "You're more sensitive," he bit down on the crook of her neck, just above her pulse point proving his statement.
"That doesn't mean I'm pregnant. It might be my period."
"Oh, but are you bleeding?" He goaded smugly. "It was supposed to be yesterday. Your period's always on time, what happened this time, huh?"
She froze, and stared back at him. "Shit… I'm late."
"You are, indeed."
"It's only a day, though. It happens."
"Not to you."
She turned her away from him and set her sight on the open water.
"I don't believe you," she shook her head.
"Let's book an appointment with Dr Greene for tomorrow."
"You're just pulling my leg."
"I would never joke about something like this with you," he gave her a pointed look, but he was kind of expecting this kind of reaction from her. "Just think about it. You suddenly don't like the smell of mayonnaise, that's odd."
"Mixed with the smell of the water, not really. It smells like fish."
"No," he laughed, shaking his head, still chuckling trying to contain his booming laughter at her pouty face. "It doesn't, but whatever you say."
"I still don't believe you. I just took the test a few days ago, and that wasn't the first one we took this week."
"Maybe they all lied."
"No, that can't be possible." Ana twisted her body back so she could see his expression and she saw that he was being absolutely serious. Her jaw dropped as she let the thought really sink in. "It's impossible, Christian…" she uttered, the confidence slipping away from her voice just like her resolve to put up an innocent façade in her father's presence.
"We could just be that unlucky couple, you know."
"We bought so many tests."
"Maybe we missed it."
"Maybe something's wrong with me."
"Don't think like that," he scolded. It used to be a rarity for him to be the one to shut down negativity but nowadays, he seemed like the more optimistic one between them; but only domestically.
She gawked at him, her mouth opening and closing with no words forming at her lips. Her mind was blank not because he was the one who dismissed the negativity but because she really hadn't connected the dots. Nor had she noticed the changes in her body either.
"Christian, your helmsman told me just the right spot to go deep sea fishing, do you think we can fit that into your busy schedule?"
Anastasia jumped away from her husband as if she had been caught lying to her Dad about this new boy she brought home. Christian's arms tightened around her waist and his hands squeezed her sides warningly as if to tell her to not run away from him.
"Of course. There's nothing on the agenda today, other than to relax and enjoy." The lightness in his voice gave nothing away, and if Ana thought that he was nervous about confessing to Ray, she was starting to doubt her assessments.
Despite all the changes in the past three years, her husband being more open and less melodramatic and mercurial, he was still hard to read.
"Daddy, Gail made sandwiches. They're in the basket over there," she pointed to the food court her husband had conveniently set up when she was busy going through the content. "They're really good, you should try it before Christian finishes them all."
Ray squinted at her daughter. He couldn't tell if her odd behavior was from her nervousness about the real purpose of this day out, or if it was something else that had been bothering her.
"Funny how you're the only one holding a sandwich at the moment," he chortled deeply, deciding to play along to the playful tone that she was going for, even though none of them could deny the tension lurking underneath all the mirthful banter.
"Ray, Gail had one made specially for you…" Christian detangled himself from Anastasia deciding to get the necessary conversation over with. "Come find me if I don't come back in a few hours," he leaned down and whispered in her ear, showing his fear for the first time since he suggested this trip. "I love you."
She felt one last pat on her shoulders and a firm, reassuring squeeze to her deltoids, he sauntered off leading Ray to all the picnic. All she could do was stare after him, and the moment she remembered who she was, where she was, and what she was actually doing, she robotically lifted up her sandwich and nibbled off a corner.
"I apologize on behalf of my wife," Christian chuckled when he saw Ray examining his goat cheese sandwich with one less corner. "If you're looking for that missing piece, try the water."
Ray laughed along taking a bite of the sandwich and closed his eyes as he reminisced the last time he tasted something so delicious, mouthwatering, and addicting, yet so simple at the same time.
"This is really good," he complimented.
"Thank you, I'll pass on the words to my housekeeper."
Ray nodded, briefly recalling the kind lady that was now seen as a mother figure to his daughter. He gathered that Gail cared about Ana very much from his few visits to Escala, and he could tell that her kindness didn't stem from the fact that she was the hostess. That small observation was calming and comforting, yet this outing gave him an unsettling feeling in the pit of his stomach.
He squared his shoulder and looked up to see his son-in-law picking up a wrapped bread, his mind seemingly miles away, but as expected, he met his inquisitive gaze anyway.
"I'm assuming there's a purpose for this impromptu outing? You sounded quite nervous over the phone."
"Yes, there is," Christian nodded. It would be pointless for him to beat around the bush at this point. He was doing this for his wife, and if this could make her feel better and help them move forward, then he'd willingly take all the beating that he deserved. "Let's move this to the deck so we can give Ana some much needed peace and rest."
Ray arched a brow and stared at Christian suspiciously but followed him anyway. He turned back in search of his daughter only to find her rummaging through the basket of food again, this time carrying the food with her as she went downstairs, only to emerge a few minutes later with a book in hand.
"I'm assuming this has something to do with the time when the both of you went radio silent for months on end all of a sudden three years ago?" He didn't hold back as he said gruffly all the while sending an accusing glare in Christian's way not bothered to hide his displeasure. "Annie never told me much about it, she always brushed it off and I didn't want to pester her but it did seem like you two went through a rough time."
Christian nodded, now wishing he at least had a beer in hand instead of a sandwich. No matter how delicious it was seconds ago, his appetite was lost entirely as the nerves crept up, hitting him in full force. He was going to ball up the sandwich if he didn't control himself, and the moment he put the bread in between his teeth he questioned the action because he didn't want anything in his mouth in the first place. It was a conflicting gesture, possibly reflecting his equally conflicting mindset at the moment.
The two men were never the ones to beat around the bush, and Christian's straight shooter personality was one of the things that Ray admired. For someone who wielded so much power, he sure could be blunt and brutally honest when he wanted to; especially in his gestures.
"I only ask you that you hear me out, and let me finish before you act," Christian pre-warned even though it was very much unnecessary because Ray could already sense it from the phone call that it was going to get nasty, and he had been mentally preparing himself of the worst fight that could possibly happen between his daughter and her husband.
"I'll let you finish," Ray promised.
"Good," Christian nodded in appreciation. His hands clenched and unclenched the hand without the sandwich, and he almost considered dropping the food into the water altogether just to free up his hands so they could fidget to divert his nervousness. He didn't remember being this nervous even when he was asking for her hand in marriage.
It only went to show how unconfident he felt at the moment, and how the verdict was already out but he still had to bite the bullet and confess to all of his sins because Ana would never sell him out no matter how bad an image her father was painting her husband.
"This all started when Ana told me that she was pregnant…" he took a deep breath and began his narration. His eyes solely fixated on the horizon but his attention was elsewhere, he honestly couldn't tell you whether they were moving or not. "I didn't take the news well, so I stormed out."
He risked a glance at his father-in-law's grim ladened face. He was expecting that the moment the first words were out of his mouth. Ray's face was impassive but his eyes weren't hard to read—they were blazing with fire as the flame shot out of his orbs but he remained calmed as promised.
"Listen, there's no better way to break it to you and I am entirely at fault. I take full responsibility for what happened. I just want you to know a bit more about me and I'm hoping that a tiny part of you can rationalize my actions."
"Can you just cut to the chase? What happened to the baby, because I see no baby and I do know for a fact that Ana was pregnant before. The two of you announced that to the family, and called me about it. I assumed that she suffered from a miscarriage because she refused to talk about it and I don't want to force an answer from her, because I don't want to see her in pain."
"No, not this time."
"You never felt the need to tell me about your early days, and I never asked. We never really spend a lot of time together getting to know each other but I trusted my instincts, and my gut told me that you're a trustworthy man. Have I made the wrong judgement?"
"No, but I have. I should've come clean to you because it was burdening on Ana in ways that none of us anticipated. You should've known a lot more about me and my past because Ana will always need someone other than me to turn to. I know that I could never replace you, and I'm not trying to, but I wanted to take care of her. I wanted her to depend on me like she did you, and I once naively thought that I would be enough for her. That she wouldn't need anyone else because I can be everything to her and she'd never be unhappy."
"What are you saying then?"
"I'm saying that I didn't realize how selfish I had been by asking her to keep my secrets for me, secrets that would eventually become a burden to her, making her feel trapped with no one to turn to. At the time, I thought it wasn't a secret anymore because it was in the past, I just didn't realize that my past is still very much affecting us.
"I had a rough start in life, and up until I met your daughter, I can say that my life had always been rough until meeting her. I was physically abused and neglected before I was given the Grey name. My birth mother was an addict and a prostitute and I was used as an ashtray by her pimp. I couldn't bear to be touched and that made me different as I grew up in a normal household. I was trying to blend in so I would try to go to parties but all I ended up doing was drinking because I couldn't be touched and standing in a crowded room made me anxious.
"My parents sent me to shrink after shrink hoping that they could nip my issues in the bud so that I wouldn't grow with them and magnify the problem. The thing is, I didn't want therapy. I was already abnormal and different from the rest of the people my age, so the last thing I wanted was for someone to find out that I was in therapy because I'm too fucked up.
"I went through the motions with the shrinks and nothing helped. I didn't improve, in fact, I was worsening and I was leading down a very slippery road toward prison and ultimately death. I didn't mind it back then because I didn't think anyone would care about me, I didn't believe that anyone would love me because I didn't think I deserved it. I told myself that I was unworthy of everything good that happened to me.
"Then, the summer when I was 15 my parents' neighbor and good friend asked me to go over for manual labor, and my parents thought it would be a good idea for me to burn off my excess energy, exhaust me and maybe distract me. So I went, and to keep the story short, she seduced me."
"Your mom's friend, and you were fifteen." Ray repeated with emphasis, and Christian bowled his head in shame after nodding once. "Jesus, fuck!"
Christian nodded both in shame and agreement with his sentiment. Three years ago he would've been defending the action because despite Ana telling him otherwise, he still believed that he was a lost cause if not for the introduction to BDSM, albeit the sick and twisted nature of his introduction. As much as he hated to admit to himself, there could've been better methods to pull him back from the destructive path that he was on. If only he had a little more patience.
"What do fifteen year-olds know, right? I thought I knew everything, thought I knew what I was doing. I wasn't really talking about consent here, but more about me believing that I was making a conscious choice to engage in the arrangement with her. I thought it was on me."
"Surely, you've dropped that notion by now."
"I was expected to know between right or wrong but in reality, no one actually taught me what was right and told me what was wrong. I was just reprimanded but I had no idea what I'd done wrong. I was born into a place surrounded by outlaws and illegal actions every single day. I didn't understand back then but I didn't have to understand anything for it to leave an impression on me. I didn't have an established psychology to begin with which made me an easy target; I was easy to prey on because I didn't know right from wrong."
"Did your parents not do anything to educate you?"
"They thought they were doing it but I wasn't very open to communication so they didn't know that I didn't understand what was going on. I was rarely punished but when I saw them punishing my brother, I never really understood why, I just knew that he did something that disappointed our parents. I quickly learned from their demeanors that I wasn't living up to their expectations and somehow I got it in my head that I've been letting them down all this time."
"So you stressed yourself out."
"Something like that. My grades were dropping, I was drinking, and getting into fights because I lash out at people when they get too close to me due to my touch issues. It went spiralling. I kept getting expelled from school, and my parents were out of depth. That's when Elena stepped in."
"Elena, this is the name of the woman that seduced you?"
Christian nodded, refusing to make eye contact with Ray.
"Look, I didn't tell you all of this before because I didn't think it would be relevant. It had no bearing on my relationship with your daughter, and I don't like to talk about it. I only told you this because I wanted you to know that my emotional immaturity has been an issue since the very beginning. Your daughter recognized that, and she's patient with me. She knows me better than I do myself, and she's been giving me time to grow and learn to become better. We didn't plan the pregnancy, and we agreed that we're going to start a family when we're both ready, so none of us anticipated the birth control to fail.
"It is painfully obvious that none of us were ready for a child. She was only twenty-two, and I was in no shape to take up the responsibility as a parent. The announcement threw me off and I didn't know how to cope. I called my therapist but he didn't pick up…"
Christian proceeded to give him a run down of the events, leaving out the details but still enough for Ray to take the hint.
Ray had long finished his sandwich and the tin foil paper in his hand was now clutched tightly into a ball, and Christian could see his knuckles turn white as he applied more pressure to the poor wrapper that had to endure the crushing force. It was at least better than for the force to be exerted on his flesh. Though, he still wouldn't put it past Ray to do something physical to him because if he had been listening to some buffoon trying to worm their way out of the fact that they had hurt the woman he loved, he wouldn't hesitate before tossing them over the railings.
"I'm not trying to defend myself here, I'm only making a confession because you wouldn't have given me a chance to listen to my side of the story. Ana and I have both been wanting to talk to you but neither of us could make up our mind as to how much we're willing to divulge. I wanted her to talk to someone she's close to but she doesn't want to let up too much detail about my past, so this is me trying to ease her burden because now you know all there it is to know about me."
Ray glowered at him through slitted eyes as he balled his hands into a fist around his sandwich wrapper, he was trying to make up his mind. He didn't know if he should trust this man sitting in front of him, no matter how earnest he looked and how sincere his emotions had been. The content of this conversation, especially the admission to his infidelity completely caught him off guard.
"What makes you think you still have all the power here? You had my daughter so brainwashed with your bullshit that she'd do anything for you. You made her keep shit from me. Did you force her into marrying you?"
"No, I swear! I would never do anything that she doesn't want me to do."
"You're a selfish control freak, and I've met your kinds before. They never end well. You had her so wrapped up in you that she couldn't even feel comfortable enough to come to me, I'm her father! I should be the one to help her when she was in destitution but that didn't happen because you won't let her."
"She makes her own decisions."
"She was trying to protect you while you were out whoring around. She was thinking about the family but you abandoned her."
"It wasn't my intention to abandon her or our baby. I was trying to find my own footing."
"You won't let her talk! You guilt tripped her into protecting your so-called secrets."
"Ray…"
"You don't get to call me Ray!" He growled.
"Mr Steele, what I call you at the moment is quite frankly, irrelevant. I'm sorry that you have to wait three years to learn what exactly happened between me and my wife. I would've reached out sooner had I known that Ana wanted other people to know."
"Don't put this on her, it's all on you! Just because she uncovered some truth, showed some apprehension and said a few hurtful words doesn't mean that you get to jet off into the sunset with some girl you met at a bar."
Ray took a step closer to Christian, and his index finger pointing at his chin, his eyes narrowed into a slit glaring at him dangerously. Christian stood his ground despite knowing that he would probably end up on the other side of the railing.
"This is between me and my wife, and yes I'm the one at fault here and I'm not trying to pin the blame on anyone. I don't have to explain myself to you but I did because I don't want you to pester Ana when she talks to you. It is a sensitive subject for the both of us and I'm happy that she's finally willing to reach out to someone. I'm confessing to you because I want you to support Ana and be on her side; that is what she needs. If I'm looking for another person to convince Ana to leave me, I would've gone to Kate."
"Why didn't you then? Why didn't you go to Kate?" Ray asked through gritted teeth, he was preparing for his next move, a move that up until now he was still hesitating on executing.
"I have nothing to prove to Kate but I have everything to prove to you. I am trying to improve, and I am trying to become the man your daughter deserves despite my fuck ups. I wanted you to know that I'm still the same man that asked you for your daughter's hand, the responsible man that you believed I am. Look, I'm probably fighting a lost cause here but I'm not going anywhere, and if we have to rebuild that trust from scratch, then so be it because I am here to stay and I won't let history repeat itself. Just because I made a mistake that doesn't mean that I can't fight for what I want and love, and what is the most important to me is your daughter."
"Well, excuse me if I don't believe you," Ray scoffed gruffly. "For what it's worth, I admire your confidence and courage," he lifted his arm to pat Christian on the back roughly, and it was a gesture that came with a warning that could hardly be missed. He knew his fate was sealed and he knew what was going to happen next, what Christian didn't know was what he should do next to prepare himself. "Maybe what you've said about your childhood and adolescence will eventually click with me, and maybe I will come around then, but for now, I hate you."
With one swift push, that palm which was laying gently in between his shoulder blade shoved him off balance and made him fall head first into the open water with the biggest splash. Ray stood by the railing, his head hovered over just enough to peer down at the clear liquid sloshing against the edge of the boat.
He frowned when he didn't see Christian surface instantly, and for a second, he wondered if he had gone too far. As much as he hated the man right now, he didn't wish him harm and deep down, he knew that if there was a hair on his head that was hurt, his daughter would never forgive him. The last thing he wanted was for Ana to live to resent him.
Ray's mind ran through the things that he was told, but nothing would register other than the fact that Christian had consciously cheated on Ana stuck to the forefront of his mind. There was nothing he could do to shake that off.
That one statement erased everything else from his head.
"Jesus, I thought you drowned," Ray let out a breath that he didn't know he was holding when Christian's head broke through the water surface. "I'm going to talk to my daughter!" He shouted down before spinning on his heels coming face to face with said daughter.
"Dad, what did you do?" Ana asked, frowning and her book was by her side still opened to the page that she was on.
"Nothing," Ray crossed his arms in front of his chest defensively.
"Where's Christian?" She pressed, unconvinced and suspicious of her father's defensive stance.
Ray didn't even bother to hide what he had done as he twisted his head over his shoulder. Ana's eyes followed but all she could see was the railing that was behind him.
"Did you throw him off of the boat?" She accused, stalking closer to her father but brushed past him, only stopping at the railing when she leaned over. Her eyes scanned the water beneath her and searched for her husband, but she couldn't see a single body. "Where is he?" She turned back, her eyes wide with panic.
"Your husband will be fine, but we need to talk, young lady."
Anastasia groaned, and she knew that this would be his reaction despite what Christian had said or how much Christian had tried to make Ray see.
"If all you're going to do is tell me how I shouldn't go back to Christian after his betrayal then I suggest you join him down there to cool down." Ana jabbed her thumb casually toward the water as her other hand closed the book in her hand before dropping it onto the table where all the food was.
"How can you go back to him after what he's done? How can you forgive him?"
"I didn't ask you out today for you to reprimand me for my decision! I was hoping that you'd actually be supportive. I wouldn't have asked to talk to you, I would've gone to Kate had I needed another person to tell me just how wrong my decision was, or how much of an asshole my husband had been! I don't need you to tell me that. I am well aware of it because I am also a normal human being who happens to know exactly how everyone is going to judge the situation that I'm in."
Ray stared at his daughter with a blank face and he was struck speechless for the first time by her outburst; this wasn't the first time she lashed out but this was certainly the most explosive.
"I just know that the moment Christian admits to his infidelity you're going to jump the gun somehow, and the rest of what he's going to tell you will fly out of your head." She said, this time her voice lowered and she sounded much more calmer.
"What else do you want me to focus on? He hurt you."
"I hurt him too! He wasn't trying to hurt me but in hindsight, I was intentionally trying to hurt him when I dismissed him as a father, because I was desperate for his attention."
"He hurt you first!"
"That doesn't matter! Just because he did it first doesn't give me the right to do the same!" Anastasia threw up her hands as she rolled her eyes at her father's antics. She knew that he was overprotective just like her husband, and she knew that it would be a long shot for her Dad to like Christian again but she thought he'd at least be there for her. "Are you going to just stand there and tell me that I'm weak for not divorcing him? Are you going to tell me to grow a backbone? Man up a little and stand up to my husband?"
"I'm not saying that you're weak. I'm just saying that you're too quick to forgive him."
"Did you think that I welcomed him back with open arms because I said no to divorce?"
"Well, did you?"
"Did Christian not tell you about how we separated for a year? We were in therapy, and we only found our normalcy and balance last year."
"And you guys are trying for a baby already? It's only been a year in your words."
"Is that all you heard from the hour-long conversation you had with him? It's been two years since we're officially back together but it's been a whole year that we feel like we're at a place where we both want to be at and are comfortable with. We both felt ready to take the next step, and I don't think you'd know that better than us."
Anastasia frowned at his father, she was seriously questioning herself, and if she had made the right call by inviting her father out and letting her father into their business.
"The only reason I even told you about everything was because I wanted to talk to you about it not for you to judge me on it."
"I'm not judging you, Annie."
"You are! You wouldn't have thrown Christian into the water if you weren't judging, and you certainly wouldn't have turned to me so sternly. We do need to talk but I want to talk to you, not the other way around. Can't you just pretend like you still like my husband?"
"What do you want me to do? Actually, what do you want me to say? You just want me to come here and vouch for that man when I'd be lying to you?" Ray bit back pointing at the person padding their way over behind Ana, and she turned around following his hand as she spotted her husband making his way over.
He was running his fingers through his soaking wet hair as he tried to get rid of the water, his shirt stuck to his body outlining his masculine contours effortlessly. Her eyes scanned him from top to bottom and lingered at his midsection, not at all bothered by the shorts that were adhered to his thighs.
She licked her lips unconsciously, thankfully the back of her head was faced toward Ray the moment she realized what she had just done. Despite Christian's expressionless face, he didn't miss the way his wife so blatantly and salaciously checked him out, so he reached a hand behind and grabbed the back of his collar, yanking his shirt over his head casually.
He knew that he didn't have to try really hard to seduce his wife, and the more nonchalant he was the better the effect. The last time he tried to seduce her, it backfired because apparently he tried too hard.
"Actually, Dad, I don't know why I even bothered. I'm going to go check on my husband, and if you want to go deep sea fishing I'm sure Christian can take you in the afternoon."
"Annie…" Ray sighed. "You know I worry about you."
"I am perfectly aware, and I appreciate that. I just wish that you don't jump down my throat the moment you realize that I didn't follow the general consensus. I chose to stay with Christian, he didn't force me. I chose to not divorce him, he didn't pressure me. I chose to abort our child, when he wanted to keep it."
"It's no secret that he's a powerful man, I just wanted you to be careful."
"Then maybe you should've given me that warning when I introduced him to you," Ana remarked, knowing that comment was rather harsh because they both knew that she wouldn't leave Christian then even if Ray voiced his opinion. "When I told Christian that I wanted to speak with you, I didn't think that I'd have to defend my marriage to you. I didn't think I should explain myself because you aren't confident in my ability to choose what's best for me. Frankly, Christian had nothing to explain to you either but he did it out of merit and respect."
"I don't want you to get hurt and you should've felt comfortable enough to come to me when you're in distress. You shouldn't be bottling it up yourself when your husband was busy. Are you happy with him after everything, Ana?"
"I am. I wouldn't have stayed if I didn't know that no one else can make me feel the way he does. You don't understand do you?" Her voice softened as she realized that she did have to explain herself because that would make her father see why she did what she did. "He makes me happy. There's no one out there that can replace him, and I'm not willing to search for another man when I know that I have everything I can hope for with him. I want him, and I would be miserable for the rest of my life if I left him. Perhaps I'll be content with the bland and drama-less life that I'd have but he makes my life exciting.
"He didn't show it to anyone, and maybe I'm biased because I love him, but he wanted that child more than I did. When I shut him out and told him that he'd make for the worst father, I was trying to spite him because he made me feel abandoned. And, when I made the choice to terminate my pregnancy, I made myself believe that I was doing it for myself but in hindsight, maybe it had been a cry for attention; I'll never know. He had been doing more research than me, and he had been making plans to support our baby but of course he didn't let anyone know about it because nothing was set in stone. I only found that out because I saw the notes in his home office. He wanted to prove me wrong."
"He cheated on you in more ways than one."
"Yes, and if I'm willing to forgive him for that and move on, why can't you?"
"How can he make you happy when he betrayed you?"
"Because you don't know him like I do, and you don't feel the way I feel for him. Dad, I don't want to spend all morning trying to defend myself as if I don't doubt myself enough. Can we all sit down and talk later?"
Ray nodded, conceding to his daughter's request.
"We'll be downstairs. Feel free to roam around and steer the boat to anywhere you like."
Ray nodded for the second time as he watched his daughter disappear below deck following the footsteps of his son-in-law, and he didn't need to be an expert to know what they'd be doing. He shuddered at that thought and stalked to the helm in an attempt to get that wayward thought out of his head.
…
"Hey," Christian greeted the moment he saw Ana walk into the room, closing the door behind them and clicking the lock in. He couldn't help the lift of the corner of his lips at that move.
"Hi," she replied softly as she approached him tentatively. "Are you okay?"
"I went for a swim," he deadpanned. "It was fun," he added wryly.
"Yeah, I'll bet," she snorted.
"Can't say I didn't see that coming," he shrugged, still half naked without a top but he was already in a pair of dry sweatpants, and had toweled his hair dry.
"I should've thought about this before putting you in a position like that."
"Honestly," he went to the edge of the bed and sat down, tugging her by her waist band, settling her in between his opened legs. "I thought about reaching out to Ray to tell him everything, but I don't know if you wanted him to know. I'm not sure if it's the fact that you think I don't want other people to know that's stopping you or that you actually don't want him to know that made you keep everything to yourself."
"You wanted to talk to him? You do know that if I wasn't here you'd be dead by now right?"
He chuckled, his hands grabbed her hips and in one swift twist, she was on her back pinned and trapped beneath his body.
"He's your father, baby. He'll want to know, and he'll eventually figure out that there was something serious."
"It wasn't life threatening."
"It could be. Besides, it's no secret that we had a child on the way. People will ask, and we can't keep lying to our families."
"We haven't been lying… not completely."
"They'll ask, and it's better to offer some information because the more we try to protect it the more they're going to want to pry, and they'll eventually put the pieces together. We'll have the upper hand if we told them what they wanted to hear while we can filter things out here and there."
She ran her hands through his hair, tugging at the ends as she squeezed out the water from them. His arms went to her head, cradling it as he leaned closer to her lips. His hips bucked, and the thin fabric of the sweatpants did nothing to hide his growing hard-on.
"How was your swim?" She ground her core into him, making him groan in her ear.
"Not cold enough to cool me down," he groused, his lips now attached to the spot behind her ear. "I can only see one solution."
"I'm listening," she tilted her chin up when his lips made their way to her pointy jaw and down her throat. Before she could come up with a follow up remark, she was stripped naked. How romantic.
Her hands slid down his nude back, sliding into his pants and pushing them down to reveal his perfectly toned ass. She felt around his hips and her hands met at the front of his crotch. He bit down on her skin when her fingers deftly removed all the fabric around his cock.
"You good?" He asked with a mouthful of her breast, his hips bucking against her hands as she played with his dick trying to pull him to her already glistening sex.
"Of course," she panted, her mind could't work fast enough to figure out what he meant by that.
"Good, because I want to fuck you and you need to be quiet," he growled. His teeth now grazing down her front but he stopped before he reached her core. He stood up, pulling away from her grasp and hold and lifted her leg over his shoulder. He turned his head and kissed his way toward the apex of her thigh from the sole of her foot.
"Christian…" she whined, her hand reached down her body and her finger pressed down on her throbbing mound.
He growled at the sight. Any other day he would happily watch her pleasure herself, but he needed to be inside of her. He needed to make sure that when they went to Dr Greene, she could actually confirm a pregnancy. All the changes in Ana's body had his baby fever reaching a new height.
He snatched her hand away from her pussy just before she could insert two digits inside, and replaced it with his tongue.
"Ah…" she mewled at the assault. "Yes…" she moaned, her eyelids sliding close as she let the pleasure wash over her.
She could hear him lapping up the juice flowing out of her as her hips bucked against his face, and she felt her inside clench involuntarily when he slid two fingers into her, tickling her walls as his mouth massaged her clit. He sucked them into his mouth before running the tip of his tongue over her sensitive spot, and his fingers never stopped to move in and out of her.
"Yes, baby," he encouraged, humming against her delicate skin as he trailed wet kisses up her naval and finally capturing her lips, giving her a taste of herself and swallowing up her moans as she denoted around his fingers.
He pulled his fingers out and sucked them into his mouth the same time he thrusted home into her, his other hand clamped around her mouth just in time to muffle her scream. He stilled inside her and replaced his hand with his mouth as he pulled himself back from climaxing, her pussy was still quivering around him which only made matters worse for him.
"Keep your voice down, baby…" he murmured, as if she'd actually stick to this reminder.
They both knew that the comment flew out of her head the moment he started rocking his hips against hers.
"Make me cum again, Christian."
…
Anastasia spun around in her round neck summer dress casually in front of the mirror in their closet, and flipped her hair over her shoulder as she shot her reflection a small smile from the side.
"Hot damn…"
She jumped slightly when Christian's voice rang in her ear before she could see him appearing behind her in the mirror.
"Is this too much? Do I show?" She turned to her side again and smoothed down the dress at her midsection.
They were told that she had been four weeks pregnant when they went to Dr Greene's office following the day out on the yacht with her father, and the reason why all the home tests came back negative was because her hCG level was too low to be detected. Her blood test had come back positive, confirming her pregnancy in addition to the ultrasound Dr Greene performed.
She was now eight weeks, and there was already a little pouch at her lower abdomen, and she was afraid that if they didn't announce it sooner she was going to show more given that this wasn't exactly her first pregnancy, and that would take away the element of surprise to the family.
"Ray will be there, too," Christian reminded her.
They sat down and talked that time on the boat, and even though the air was cleared, Anastasia was still slightly cold toward his father because she knew that deep down he still didn't approve of Christian, and that was the very reason why she didn't want anyone else to know about their issues in the first place.
"I know, it's okay," she sniffled, pulling another tissue from the box to wipe her nose.
"Are you sure you're feeling fine?" He asked, concerned. He grabbed her forearms to get her attention and forced her to look at him in the eyes. "We don't have to go if you're too tired."
"I'm okay. It's fine, Christian. We can leave after dinner if I don't feel like staying too late."
"Are you sure? I mean you can hardly keep any food down, do you think you can get through dinner? I don't want something to trigger you."
"We'll see. I just emptied my stomach anyway, so I won't puking anytime soon."
Christian scowled, still hating the idea, but since she insisted that she was fine.
The moment they arrived at his parents' house, they were surrounded, even Ray made his way to the door having arrived only a fraction earlier to chat with Carrick and catch up with Elliot and Kate.
"You guys made it!" Grace and Mia rushed forward, the both of them charging at Anastasia simultaneously as if she was the daughter and Christian was the one that married into the family.
Ana scrunched her nose the minute Grace's perfume hit her nostrils, and she instantly pulled away from her.
"I'm sorry," she excused just before she sneezed into her sleeve. When she looked up she was faced with a mixture of concern and mirth from everyone's expression, but she waved them off insisting that she was feeling fine.
Christian handed her his handkerchief for her to blow her nose into.
"What do you want to drink, Ana? Kate and I are having mimosas, I can make you one," Mia offered, looping her arms through the brunette's, subsequently pulling her away from the rest of the family.
"It's fine, I'll just have some juice or water," she allowed herself to be dragged into the kitchen.
"We're trying something new, and added a little something into it," Mia obviously never listened to her guests as she rushed around to pour Ana a glass of mimosa, handing it to her. "Try it. I know you're not a big drinker, so just take a sip? Kate said you'd like it."
Not wanting to give anything away, Ana brought it to her lips and took the tiniest sip of it praying that Christian would walk in anytime to interfere.
She shuddered at the sourness that seeped into her tastebud the moment the liquid hit her tongue, and her face scrunched up involuntarily before she could mask the expression. Mia frowned.
"Blech, I can't taste anything other than the hint of bubbly drink. Did you use concentrated orange juice?"
"It's supposed to be really sweet! Like, we both thought we might've added too much…" Mia protested, taking a sip from the same glass herself proving her point. "Christian, try it and tell me it's sweet," she turned to her brother who entered just in time to see Ana's shoulders sag in relief. "Ana said she can't taste anything other than the wine."
Christian gave her a pointed look for even touching alcohol but she shrugged, it wasn't like she volunteered to taste it.
"Did you empty the entire juice bottle and added simple syrup to it? Was there even a single drop of champagne in this or did you actually only use tonic water?" He reached for a glass of water and downed it entirely in one gulp. "How sweet are you aiming for, Mia? Jesus." He looked at Ana and knew better than to actually question why she took the glass from his overly persistent sister.
"Oh my god, Ana…" Mia was suddenly struck with an idea as she watched Anastasia reach into her pocket to produce another tissue paper to blow her nose."Mom!" She yelled, not wanting to scare the couple in the room.
"What's wrong?" Grace's eyes darted between the bodies in the kitchen as she watched Mia subtly inching away from the married couple.
"I… I think Ana might have the virus…" Mia whispered but the room was so quiet that everyone heard it loud and clear.
Christian and Anastasia exchanged a confused glance before cracking a smile.
"We just got tested and it came back negative," Anastasia confirmed. "I'm just tired,"
Grace's face struck with alarm as another box was ticked for Covid.
"Actually, Mom, we do have an announcement to make," Christian bit his cheeks to hide his smile. He was surprised that his Mom and sister still didn't catch on when none of them seemed worried at the possibility of Ana having Covid.
"Wait, Ana. You're tired, your taste changed, and you have a runny nose…"
"Yeah, today's a bad day…" Christian whistled lowly from the side, sharing a secretive glance with his wife.
"And I puked earlier," Anastasia added, stating the fact.
"Morning sickness…" Christian quipped from the side, unable to keep this to himself for any longer.
Grace's head whipped to her youngest son, and watched the grin stretch across his face. Her eyes widened as she pieced everything together.
"You're pregnant," she said to Ana.
This story isn't marked as complete just yet...
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