A couple days later,
Mike hit the doorbell while he juggled Kaito and his Secret Santa gift. The door opened, before he had a chance to say 'hi' before he was pulled in. Kaito was out of his arms, the present disappeared and he was left standing at the precipice of a Christmas wonderland. Tex was not wrong about Andrea going overboard as Mike could not see any space left untouched by Christmas.
"What just happened?" Mike asked.
"Welcome to the North Pole of St Louis." Tex said cheerfully.
"You were not lying, this is worse than her last Christmas with Bill." Mike said in low voice to Tex. Mike flinched as a toy train blew it's whistle as it ran it's way past them.
"I'm not sure if I should be worried or honoured." Tex said with a frown.
"I'd go with both." Mike said.
"Come on in. You're the last to arrive." Tex said as he showed Mike the way through the house so as not to disturb the decor.
"Ladies, Gentlemen." Mike said as everyone stopped at his presence. Andrea smiled as she came up to them.
"Mike, so good to see you and Kaito." She said warmly.
"Good to see you too, I love the house." Mike said.
"No corner has been left bare. Your Santa hat." Andrea said, she held out a Santa to him. It looked like no one was getting away without one. As everyone had a Santa's hat on.
"I have to?" He asked.
"You do." Andrea said with a sweet smile but he didn't miss the veiled sense of a threat in her body language.
"Ok." He said, he pulled the hat on and joined the others.
"Thank you for putting Kaito in the snowbaby suit. It's adorable." Andrea said, she smiled at Kaito who was dressed as snowman. He looked ridiculously cute in it.
"I wanted him to feel included. How are you?" Mike asked her.
"Very well." Andrea said with a happy smile.
"It's not easy at this time of the year." He said, he knew what it was like to put on a good show for everyone even when one didn't feel Christmas Joy in its entirety.
"No, but we make the best of it." Andrea said, letting her mask of happiness slip just a moment. She squeezed his arm in a comforting manner.
"True, and you are excelling at it." Mike assured her, a tiny bell rang out and Andrea's face lit up.
"Dinner- I mean lunch is ready!" she announced.
They all sat down at the table, the spread was lavish and smelt amazing. They cracked their bon bons and pulled on their paper hats over their Santa hats. They dug into the food and shared funny stories. Mike enjoyed it all as he'd forgotten what it was like to sit around a table that wasn't somber with grief and trauma. It felt good to be surrounded by family, as the people at the table were his found family. He felt blessed to have them in his life.
"Mike, Sasha told me you got a tree up this year." Andrea said.
"Yeah, we've been sharing Christmas traditions and what not. It's been good." Mike said, he smiled softly at Sasha. She smiled back before she continued to eat.
"Did she share the Gingerbread recipe with you?" Kara asked.
"No, we made the gingerbread but I wasn't allowed to know exactly what was in it." Mike said in amusement as Kara's hope deflated somewhat.
"Ugh, I was so hoping as her Gingerbread cookies are the best." Kara said.
"They are a family secret." Sasha told her.
"We're all family here." Wolf told her.
"Yes, a secret from the family." Sasha said in a tongue in cheek manner.
"She'll take it to the grave." Danny quipped.
"I will write it down and put it in a lock box and leave it in my will to whoever annoys me the least." Sasha joked.
"Well, that counts me out." Miller quipped, everyone chuckled.
"And Tex." Mike said.
"I am shocked by that accusation. I am not annoying." Tex scoffed in mock outrage.
"Kaito will get it." Wolf speculated.
"Why do you say that?" Sasha drawled in amusement.
"Cause he's the perfect baby." Mike said in a matter of fact manner.
"Hardly, he farted on me last time I held him." Tex said.
"That's a butt kiss. You should feel honoured." Danny told him.
"A what?" Tex asked.
"You explain it." Kara told Danny, she shook her head at him.
"My mother said that babies and ladies don't fart. They blow butt kisses to show their affection." Danny said, everyone looked at him like he had a screw loose as they couldn't tell if he was being truthful or playing a joke.
"So, when Kara blows a butt kiss your way, you feel loved?" Wolf teased, Danny gave a shrug as if to say 'yes, that's accurate'.
"He even says I love you too after I do it." Kara joked, the table burst into laughter.
"Butt Kisses, I'm gonna use that." Tex said, more laughter ensued as they knew the man would never let it go. Andrea facepalmed at just the idea of him using it.
"So, given Kaito is gonna get the recipe...that means Slattery will have it." Cruz said.
"Geez, you already digging my grave for me?" Sasha asked.
"Well, it's Plan 'B'. Plan 'A' is a bank heist." Cruz told her.
"I'm in." Kara said.
"Really, you'd risk jail for a recipe? Who will raise our son if we end up in Prison?" Danny asked her, he smoothed a hand over Frankie's downy hair as to remind Kara their child was there.
"You're jinxing the heist before we even have a whiteboard to plan it." Wolf told Danny.
The meal continued in the same vein of humour until dessert was consumed. Mike cuddled a sleeping Kaito as the poor kid fell asleep while eating berries. His forehead had a purple stain from a blackberry he'd face planted into when he passed out mid dessert. They all had moved into the living room for presents part of the afternoon.
"Everyone ready?" Tex asked, he held out a bowl.
"Yes." they all said excitedly.
"Take a number." He told them, everyone took turns taking a number. "Whoever gets the lowest number goes first. No stealing or picking your own gift." he reminded them.
"We are just playing White Elephant." Alisha said.
"There's no stealing, only envy and laughter. I'm keeping my eye on you Wolf given you're from the Penal Colonies." Tex told Wolf.
"Yeah, like over 200 years ago. We have evolved." Wolf argued.
"Yeah, you only do petty crimes like steal food and office stationary." Kara drawled mockingly. She held Frankie in her arms to stop him from crawling over to the presents and unwrapping them.
"One time, I needed a pen and suddenly it's 'theft'." Wolf drawled, everyone chuckled.
"Ok, let's do this." Andrea said, one by one they all took their turns and picked a present from the pile on the floor. They tore off the paper, Mike frowned as he held a pillow with Tex's face on it.
"Wow, Tex, you shouldn't have." Mike drawled in an acerbic manner.
"It's gonna look great on the couch." Tex said with a cheeky grin.
"I'm sure Kaito will love drilling some butt kisses into it." Mike quipped.
"I am already his fart cushion." Tex retorted in good humour. everyone was laughing over the pillow and his teasing. They looked around as the presents went downhill from there.
"I've always wanted to time my dumps." Wolf quipped as he held up a Poo timer.
"You could become an Olympic Dumper." Sasha teased.
"The Fastest Shitter in the East." Danny drawled with a terrible Southern Accent.
"Oh my lord, I know what I'm wearing tonight." Tex said as he pulled on a Christmas Mankini over his clothes and adjusted himself.
"Dad, ew!" Kat said, as others laughed at Tex as he snapped the swimsuit and winced as the elastic hit him hard in the chest. Everyone laughed.
"I don't get it." Diaz said as he held up Salt and Pepper shakers that said 'Push it,' on one and the other 'Push it real good'.
"How dare you claim to be a fan of music when you don't know a classic like Salt 'n' Pepa's push it..." Cruz told Diaz.
"Ah Push it," Miller sang and the beat box with Cruz while Alisha rapped the first verse.
"Ah Push it Real good!" Cruz and Alisha finished, everyone cheered while Kat and Diaz still looked perplexed.
"Just google it, you ignoramus." Miller told him, everyone laughed while Diaz chagrined.
"Well, can I say 'Thank you' to my Secret Santa as this Sweater dress is awesome." Kara said as she pulled on the green monstrosity. It swamped her, it had a trail of green tinsel and decorations hanging off of it. She stuck her hands in her pocket and the sweater lit up. She raised her hands above her head. "I'm a tree!" she announced.
"Oh, I love that." Sasha said, she wore a reindeer hat. She squeezed on the paws, the ears on the hat twitched. It was adorable and hilarious on her. "This hat is awesome." she added.
"Well, my gift is just rude." Cruz said as he held up a book titled 'Go fuck yourself, I'm colouring in'. Everyone laughed as Clara took the book from him and clutched it to her chest.
"Mine." she announced.
"What did you get, Miller?" Sasha asked.
"This, finally something that can keep my hand and arm warm in the winter while keeping my beer cold." Miller said as he pulled on a sock that was sewn around a beer holder.
"I feel like I have the most magical gift." Danny said he held up a Unicorn wine holder. It was a unicorn laying on its back with it's mouth open and legs up in the air.
"I can beat that. I have a Jar of Unicorn Sharts that are going to bring me good luck." Kat said as she held up a jar filled with tiny Christmas lights and a tiny rainbow ribbon on top.
"You all are obsessed with poo." Tex told them, shaking his head at them.
"We may have to have a moratorium on this for next year." Andrea observed.
"No, I want a chance of getting Unicorn Sharts." Miller complained.
"Yeah, don't be a Grinch. Unicorn Sharts make the best nightlight." Danny quipped.
"I second that." Mike said, agreeing with Danny.
"You made this?" Andrea asked him, she gestured at the Jar.
"No, I did not. But I might make one for Kaito." Mike said in amusement.
"They are not that hard to make." Sasha quipped, she outed herself as the person who made it.
"Andrea, what did you get?" Tex asked.
"Some beautiful slippers." Andrea said with a grin as she held up Shark slippers.
"Give them to me." Tex said.
"No, they are mine." Andrea told him, she held her slippers close as she didn't want them hijacked for a Tex skit.
"Yeah, no stealing, remember?" Alisha quipped, she was flipping through her Snoop Dog cookbook.
"I want it to complete my outfit." Tex said, he pouted.
"Too bad, I'm not giving them up." Andrea informed him.
An hour or later, the party broke up and after helping with the clean up they all parted ways. Mike and Sasha were the last to leave with Kaito as everyone had other family gatherings to get to.
"That was a lot of fun." Sasha said, she carried Kaito in her arms to the car. Mike carried his gift and some leftovers for both he and Sasha.
"It was good, tomorrow is Christmas." Mike said.
"Yes, it is." Sasha replied.
"Do you want to stay over the night at my place or come in the morning?" Mike asked her.
"I'll come in the morning, make sure to save some presents for me to watch Kaito open." Sasha said.
"I will." Mike promised.
"Ok, little fella, in the car seat you go." Sasha told Kaito, he grumped at being let go but Sasha ignored his attitude. She strapped him in. Mike placed the bags into the back and passed one over to Sasha.
"I'll see you in the morning." Mike said.
"See you then." Sasha said a little awkwardly, they said goodbye and went their separate ways. Mike watched her get into her car and drive away, he turned to look at Kaito who was whining at being in the car seat.
"I know, I know." Mike said, luckily it was a short trip home.