Dana Scully's Apartment Complex
3170 West 53 Rd., Apartment #35
Georgetown, Washington D.C.
December 23rd, 1994 8:24 P.M.
Why did he think this was a good idea?
In the moment, the plan had seemed so flawless. Mulder had never met anyone who loved Christmas as much as Scully. It wasn't in the way of obnoxious sweaters and incessant Christmas tidings, she was different. With every passing day he could see a glow on her face, her disposition was markedly cheerier, and in the last few working days, she was subdued in her festivities by adorning emerald green and crimson scarlet pantsuits. She'd been disappointed when he said he wasn't going to do anything, so for some reason, he thought she might be happy to celebrate a little early and see that he was, at least for her, feeling the Christmas spirit.
But really, Mulder knew that Christmas spirit had nothing to do with why he decided to drive across town at eight o'clock on Christmas Eve Eve to give Scully a present: it was his ever-present and nagging concern. She was still recovering from the after-effects of her abduction, and his default state was worry whenever she wasn't around for him to visually see. Rationally, he knew checking in on her would do nothing other than bring him peace of mind. She was a medical doctor, she knew her body better than anyone, but it still didn't stop the way he craved her presence like a magnet vibrating in desperation to be connected with its other half.
However, he was now broaching on thirty minutes of sitting in the car, freezing his ass off with the present in his hand while he debated going inside. He idly fingered the masking tape holding the brown parchment paper together. It wasn't as pretty as most of the presents he knew she usually got, but it was the best he could do - he couldn't even remember the last time he'd tried to wrap a present.
With a sigh, he decided it would be best not to intrude. This was a time to be with family and celebrate, not a time for her overbearing coworker to drop by uninvited with selfish motives. Dejectedly, he set the package in the passenger seat next to him, but his palms were sweaty and his keys slipped through his fingers, ending up on the car mat by his seat.
"Damn it," he murmured, leaning forward so he could feel around for a metallic ring.
He grabbed them, leaning back up to start the car, only to jump in his seat when he saw a person standing right next to the driver's window, peering inside.
"Jesus," he exclaimed, his heart pounding. His fear was replaced with embarrassment as he realized it was Scully looking at him through the glass.
He rolled down the window and the sound of her tinkling, melodic laughter filled the car like the cool breeze with every crank. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," she chuckled.
Mulder smiled at her amusement, even if it was at his expense, "You're sneaky, you know that?"
"Says the one ominously parked outside my apartment complex," she teased.
It had started to snow since he'd arrived and the little snowflakes were falling from the sky as if they were dancing. Twirling and flitting in the breeze as they were all racing to dissolve on Scully. As he watched one's descent onto her freckled cheek, he noted that she had clearly been walking somewhere as the tip of her nose was red and she was shivering. "Do you mind if I come up for a minute?" he asked. "I just have something to give you."
Mulder didn't mean to be presumptuous and invite himself into her apartment, but he wanted to get her out of the cold as quickly as he could. He was glad he did though as her face completely lit up with a beaming smile he rarely saw. "You got me something?" she exclaimed. Then, as if trying to subdue her obvious excitement, added, "You didn't have to do that."
"Are you kidding?" he asked, opening the door a crack as he rolled up the window so they could still talk. "Of course I did."
He followed her hurried steps up to the apartment and watched her graceful movements, despite the obvious shivering of her body. "Why were you out?" he asked.
"I wanted to grab Mr. Chopsticks for dinner," she replied, holding up a bag of Chinese.
"Don't they deliver?" he replied, putting his arm above her head to hold her door open for her.
"Thanks," she murmured, walking inside her apartment before adding, "I didn't want them to have to drive in the snow, and I live so close anyway."
That is so Scully, he mused to himself. He'd laugh if he wasn't concerned for her. Mulder constantly felt himself getting frustrated because she was the one who always helped him understand the medical aspects of things, but now he was in the position where when he wanted to understand what was going on more than ever before - he couldn't ask because he didn't want to pry into her business.
All he could understand was what he could visually observe alongside the few hints she would drop about how she was doing. If he asked her explicitly, she was always just 'fine.'
When she was returned, she was a little swollen, but the weight rapidly dropped until she was thinner than he'd ever seen her, which was concerning since she was always tiny to him. Her muscles had been tense and sore for the first few weeks, she was paler than usual, she'd grab her side every now and then, she was exhausted yet could never seem to fall asleep at night when they were on cases - but he didn't know what any of it meant.
All in all, he was in a constant state of wanting to know if she was okay while not wanting to overstep a boundary.
"How are you doing?" he asked, watching as she toed off her shoes and slipped off her coat to reveal a forest green sweater that complimented her hair. He hadn't asked her that question yet today, so he was hoping it wouldn't aggravate her like it usually did.
"Pretty good. I'm going to see my family tomorrow and I'm excited about that," she replied with a soft smile before holding out her hand for his coat.
"No, that's okay. I won't stay long, I don't want to intrud-" he rambled, only to be cut off by Scully's succinct statement.
"Shut up, Mulder," she retorted with a smirk.
He smiled and let his jacket fall from his shoulders before handing it to her to hang up. "Sorry, I'm not as festive," he replied, gesturing to his heather grey t-shirt.
"Speaking of, are you still not doing anything for the holiday?" she asked, walking to the kitchen.
"Well my mom's a Christian, my dad's Jewish, and I'm agnostic, so between us all we like to celebrate with a phone call and some generic well-wishes," he replied leaning against the kitchen counter as he watched her work.
Mulder raised his hand and shook his head as he saw Scully splitting the food in half. "Scully, don't. That's your food," he requested gently.
"You'd be doing me a favor. I'm going to be bringing home so many leftovers from Christmas festivities and I can't finish this all by myself," she replied, grabbing two forks.
"Are you sure?" he asked, his head moving to watch her walk past him and set the table.
"I insist. You're my guest," she smiled before walking past him again and grabbing a bottle of wine and two glasses.
She seemed happy to see him, pleased even. For a moment he indulged the fleeting thought that she might've missed him too. He pushed it aside as she motioned for him to come follow her to the table. "Thank you," he replied, slipping into the seat adjacent to her.
"Of course," she replied before adding. "I think you should go visit your parents tomorrow or on Christmas."
He shrugged and twirled his fork around the chow mein. "I don't know. Dad has a place over in Martha's Vineyard, and then mom's all the way over in Greenwich. It just seems like a lot of hassle."
"Oh yeah, you don't want to interrupt your weekend full of aimlessly wasting time, wishing that you were at work," she teased before shoveling some chicken into her mouth.
He exhaled a laugh before nodding. "You got me there. I just don't think they'd be so excited to see me."
He was drawn to a small, cool hand tugging on his. Mulder glanced over at Scully and saw a small frown on her lips. "You're their son. Of course they'd be happy to see you. You could spend tomorrow with your Dad, then Christmas with your mom, and then you can just meander back."
"You really love Christmas, don't you?" he chuckled, taking a bite of food.
She withdrew her hand and nodded, looking into her wine glass. "I think it's important to spend the holiday with the people you love. You never know when it'll be your last."
He felt guilt settle in the pit of his stomach as he realized the implication of her words. "This is your first Christmas without your father. I'm so sorry, Scully."
She averted her gaze, and in a tight voice replied, "Me too."
Mulder felt awkward, unsure of what to say that could even slightly fill the bottomless hole of her grief. He simply just shifted awkwardly in his seat. She was right, if he'd known that was the last holiday he'd spend with Samantha, he would've done things differently too. "I think I'll take you up on that. It's a good idea."
"I'm sorry, I don't mean to be a buzzkill," she replied, picking at her food.
Mulder shook his head adamantly, "No, please don't feel that way. I'm your friend. I want to know about your life." Friend felt childish when she'd saved his life countless times over the past two years, but it was true. Scully was the best friend he'd ever had.
She smiled in appreciation. He knew so little about her, he didn't know if this was the first time she'd been able to vent to someone. Did Scully have friends? Surely she must. She has to have plenty of friends. Did she consider him to be her friend? He was pulled out of his mental spiral by the sound of her voice. "I'm worried about Mom, but I'm hoping we can make her feel better since we're all there. It'll be easier with Missy there. She has charm and an innate ability to make everything better." she admitted.
"So do you," he reassured, tapping her foot under the table while taking a bite. He wasn't used to this - Scully being so open with him without him having to pry. It was nice, despite the circumstances. He wanted to know everything there was to know about her.
Scully rolled her eyes but smiled nonetheless. "Thanks," she deadpanned, adding, "But I don't think my family is expecting much from me since I was such a drag during Thanksgiving."
"What happened?" he asked, picking at his crab rangoon.
"I don't think you want to hear-" she started.
"I do," he replied, maybe a little too eagerly. He cleared his throat and took a sip of wine hoping it didn't come off so desperately to her.
She looked a little chagrined but continued anyway, "I'd only been out of the hospital for a little over two weeks and I was still having a hard time keeping things down. I think I overdid it and I ended up spending most of the night on the bathroom floor."
Upon his look, she added, "It wasn't that bad though. My mom, Missy, and Tara sat on the floor with me and we chatted and Missy painted everyone's nails to match their chakra or whatever while Bill sulked in the living room. I told them I just got food poisoning earlier, but I think they all knew it was something else."
"What do you think it was?" he asked, trying to keep his tone as conversational as possible lest she misconstrue his meaning and think he was treating her like part of a case file.
"I really don't know," she replied, taking another sip of wine in contemplation. "I'm not saying that to dismiss you. I just - it doesn't make sense."
"What do you mean?" he asked, taking a sip of his own glass.
"I-I um," she stammered. He always knew she was getting uncomfortable or overwhelmed because her usual cadence was so eloquent and smooth. She wasn't easily at a loss for words. "I can't remember anything, doing anything, but my limbs weren't atrophied. I wasn't malnourished, but yet I had a hard time getting my eating back to normal. I just-" she paused, seemingly getting lost in thought.
Scully turned to him suddenly, glancing at his hands rather than his eyes, "Can we talk about something else?" she asked.
"Can I just ask if you're feeling any better?" he asked gently, bowing his head to catch her eye. He was glad to see a genuine smile reflected in her gaze when she nodded, affirming him softly, "Yes. I promise. I'm still getting my bearings from being gone, but I'm better than I was."
Then, out of left field, she asked, "Did you do anything for Halloween?"
His brows furrowed before realizing she'd missed it completely. The holiday came and went without her. He didn't know how to say he missed it too. Anything that didn't involve Dana Katherine Scully didn't matter to him. "I, um, I think I watched Plan 9 from Outer Space," he answered with a shrug.
"Ooh," she lilted teasingly. "I didn't know any of your tapes were rated below NC-17."
"Oh mine all are, the tapes Skinner stores in our office I can't account for," he joked back, making her laugh into her wine glass. It wasn't often she laughed freely, and it was his greatest point of pride when he was the cause. Her cheeks were still rosy, now from the wine and spirit rather than the cold, and he realized it was the first time in a long time he'd seen color on her face. It was a sight he missed.
"I um, I didn't know how to bring it up earlier," she giggled, pressing the backs of her hands to her cheeks to cool them down. "But I just wanted to say thank you for coming over frequently and tidying up for me. You know, when I was gone."
A surge of embarrassment rushed through Mulder and he felt his own cheeks color at the newfound knowledge that his excursions into her place weren't as covert as he thought. At first he was able to pass it off as being helpful. The crime scene crew was notorious for leaving a mess and he didn't want Mrs. Scully to have to clean up broken glass and her daughter's blood, so he spent a weekend wiping Scully's blood from the floor, sweeping glass, and making sure the window repairman did a good job. He wanted it to look nice for her when she came back.
Then he found himself struggling to function unless he could center himself by simply being around her stuff since it was the closest thing he had to her. He didn't want to invade her space, so he only went where she'd allowed him to be in the past - which included the entryway, the living room, and the bathroom - but he barely counted the last one since he only had been in there before to stop a liver eating mutant from hurting her.
So almost every day he stopped in to her place, sometimes for a few minutes just to simply grab her mail, other times for hours as he sat on her striped couch and wondered where she was. Only once had Mrs. Scully walked in on him sleeping on her couch, but he hadn't even thought about the fact that it was obvious to the woman that he came far more than was probably acceptable for her coworker, or that Mrs. Scully would inevitably pass that information along.
"I'm sorry, that was presumptuous of me," he apologized.
Scully shook her head with a sweet smile that made him shut up just to admire it. "No, that was a huge burden off of my mom. You really didn't have to do that, so it just means a lot to me that you went out of your way."
"I missed you," he admitted. She stared at him, seemingly surprised he was so open about it and he immediately shifted shyly in his seat, knocking the rest of his wine back before deflecting with, "The office isn't the same without you."
Scully just smirked and nodded. "What happened to your hand?" she asked, pointing to the hand on the wine glass.
He pulled it away, examining the tan bandage wrapped around his ring finger. "I...I nicked myself on scissors."
"Doing what?" she chuckled.
"Let's just say my wrapping skills are a little rusty," he admitted in embarrassment.
She pouted in sympathy before her attention was drawn to the sad little package sitting next to him. Scully turned back to him, excitement in her eyes and said "Will you put the dishes in the sink? I need to grab something."
"Sure," he nodded, grabbing their empty plates and making his way to the kitchen while she disappeared down the hallway.
"Pour me more wine please," she shouted from the other room.
"Okay," he shouted back with a chuckle. Mulder rinsed off the plates before turning and filling up her glass. He still was anxious about overstaying his welcome and wanted to be good enough to drive, so he filled his own glass with water instead.
While she rummaged in the other room, he looked around her place. It always amazed him that his apartment was a place to rest whereas hers was an honest to goodness home. She had some eclectic pieces of art, but it was so indescribably her that merely being here put him at ease. Maybe that said more about her than the apartment.
She had freshly put up Christmas decorations, a wreath on the door, a tree in the corner, small things he wouldn't have put the energy into but she went out of her way to do. There was something endearing about the image of Scully coming home and indulging in these simple pleasures. Turning on the lights of her Christmas tree, lighting her little holiday candles, all for the simple purpose of enjoying life. It made his heart grow three sizes in his chest.
One thing caught his eye in contrast to the seasonal decor and he walked across the room to get a better look. A wide smile broke across his face as he saw the empty case of Superstars of the Superbowl next to the VCR.
"Okay, I hid it better than I thought I had, but I found-what are you looking at?" Scully's voice called out, drawing nearer. Her voice was shy and he turned around to see she was trying to pick up on where his attention was.
"You kept it?" he asked, pointing to the VHS tape. He'd gotten it for himself, but on the drive there he got anxious and decided it would be a good icebreaker to give her a gift since he wasn't sure how to interact as an outsider in the clan of Scully women.
Scully's hands were behind her back and he watched as she shifted her weight from one foot to the other. "I, um, yeah," she laughed in embarrassment.
"Did you watch it?" he asked. Despite the fact it was obvious the VHS had been in the VCR, he still couldn't believe it.
"There was nothing else on TV," she replied quickly.
There was a moment of silence between them as they both waited to see if he would call her on the obvious lie, but he decided he didn't want to press too hard and make her feel embarrassed over a sweet moment.
"What's behind your back?" he asked, walking towards her and holding her wine out to her.
"Wait, sit down," she demanded. "I'm going to grab your gift. Let's open them together."
"You got me something?" he asked with a toothy smile.
"Of course I did," she laughed, grabbing his gift with far more precious delicacy than he ever had and in this moment he wished more than anything he'd gotten her something better.
Last year he truly hadn't known relatively anything about her. They spent, at minimum, forty-five hours a week together, but they'd been so new to each other. Looking back, they'd been almost shy when it came to really talking about themselves aside from that night on their first case. He knew the ins and outs of Special Agent Scully, but very little about Dana. He'd thought of getting her bubble bath since he saw she liked them, but 'I noticed you liked them when that creep Tooms broke into your apartment' felt inappropriate on top of the intimate gesture of getting her something for a bath. So instead, he ended up going to a local bookstore, figuring she was a literary nerd from how many paperbacks he saw her devour at airports. When he saw an old copy of Breakfast at Tiffany's he thought it was perfect. Scully was the Holly Golightly to his Unnamed Narrator, an absolutely fascinating enigma.
She looked appreciative of the book, but it didn't compare to her thoughtful present of a bobbing UFO toy for his aquarium.
He'd tried harder this year, but he still felt inadequate.
"I got the gift receipt if you don't like it. I probably should have gotten you something better, since I don't know your preferences on-" he was silenced by the soft touch of her fingertips to his lips.
"Mulder, I'm touched you got me something and drove all the way over here to give it to me," she replied, lowering her hand to her lap as she handed him her present and hugged his to her chest. "I'm sure I'll love it. Do you mind if I go first?" she asked, the glimmer of an impatient child shining through her eyes.
"Yeah, go ahead," he chuckled, smiling as he watched her tear through the wrapping paper at warp speed.
She opened the box and pulled out a blue, cotton set of pyjamas. "I overestimated the size because I thought it would be more comfortable," he murmured, watching enraptured as she rubbed the fabric against her cheek with a blissful smile.
"Mulder, I love these. They're perfect, thank you so much," she beamed, leaning forward on the couch so she could wrap her arms around his neck. He smiled into her shoulder, rubbing a hand up and down her back as he inhaled the smell of her shampoo.
"If you end up not liking them later, just let me know. I can-" he rambled, pausing as she backed away and shook her head.
"That won't be necessary, Mulder. I mean it, these are really nice," she beamed, holding the pyjamas on her lap.
"Can I open mine?" he asked, looking down at the Frosty the Snowman wrapping paper.
"Now it's my turn to feel like my gift is inadequate," she replied, exhaling a laugh.
"Impossible," he replied.
He looked down and saw there was a tag labelled:
My dear friend, Fox Mulder.
Lots of love, Dana Scully.
He stroked the paper in his hand, the impression of the signature like a flame on his thumb. Dear friend. Lots of love. He was beaming and he hadn't even opened it. He pulled off the tag, wordlessly putting it in his pocket.
Mulder tore open the paper and was met with a set of pale blue tea cups. "It's just, you never seem to have dishes when I've been over. I thought a set might be nice for coffee going over cases, or um if you have any guests over," she explained. Now it was evidently her turn to ramble. Despite all they'd been through, apparently they both worried about making the other uncomfortable.
She hadn't said it per se, but Mulder's selective hearing heard it: So you can make us something to drink if I'm at your place. Within a moment these cups turned from a nice, albeit odd, gift into being a symbol of a friendship she'd like to continue and he couldn't be more thrilled.
"I really needed something like this, Scully. Thank you. You'll have to come over sometime and I can show you that, despite the state of my kitchen, I can make a mean cup of coffee," he informed her, watching as she sipped on her wine.
"Are you sure you like them? I also kept the gift receipt," she replied nervously - as if he would ever be ungrateful for anything she'd give him.
"I mean it. Blue's my favorite color too," he replied, setting them on the table so he could hug her in return.
"I thought so from all your shirts and ties," she mumbled against his collarbone.
Mulder couldn't remember the last time he'd experienced anything so peaceful. They were surrounded by the gentle murmurs of her neighbors' festivities, he felt full of good food, for the first time in forever he felt happy, and Scully felt warm and soft in his arms. He wished he could live in this moment for the rest of his life. Scully getting healthy and strong as they both simply enjoyed each other's company, there was no better Christmas gift than this.
He was proven wrong when Scully pulled back slightly and he felt her lips press a sweet, gentle kiss on his cheek right next to the corner of his mouth.
Scully pulled away fully as her eyes darted to her lap, a shy smile quirking her lips up. "Sorry," she chuckled, raising her hand to cup his cheek as she wiped her lipstick off his skin.
All he did was smile in response as he didn't know what to say other than beam at her. "I lied, I watched it because I had a nightmare and felt lonely a few weeks ago."
"What?" he replied, trying to mentally catch up with her.
"The football tape. I watched it of my own volition. I had one of those nightmares where you wake up and you feel like you're the only person in the world, and so I laid on the couch and watched the tape because I didn't want to bother anyone and it made me feel better," she explained, letting her hand fall to her lap.
"You can always call me," he replied softly.
"Well, it was really nothing. I was going to work in a few hours anyway," she shrugged, brushing it off.
He nudged her dainty foot with his much larger one to get her attention. Waiting until her sky blue eyes were locked on his before continuing. "I mean it. I'm just a phone call away if you ever need to vent, or if you just want someone to talk about the game with," he teased.
"Thank you, Mulder," she replied with a smile that was quickly hidden behind her hand as she stifled a yawn.
He took that as his cue and stood up with his new teacups. "I don't want to keep you up all night, I know we both have family to go visit tomorrow," he stated.
She smiled in response and followed him to the door, holding the present while he put his coat on. "Thank you for having me over on such short notice," he said appreciatively.
"Thanks for coming over. It made my night more interesting," she replied, handing the gift back to him.
"I've been told that's one of my talents," he chuckled.
Maybe it was the Christmas spirit, or the way she was beaming up at him, but he couldn't resist the urge to lean down and press a kiss to the same spot she'd kissed him. When he pulled away she was smiling at the ground and playing with her fingernails.
"Merry Christmas, Scully," he murmured.
"Merry Christmas, Mulder," she replied with a grin.
While he loved the teacups, it was a little piece of paper that he found himself coming back to for the rest of the weekend.
My dear friend, Fox Mulder.
Lots of love, Dana Scully.