A Long Goodbye and a Warm Hello
Summary: Tanjirou's journey to meeting a dear butterfly once more.
Notes: Inspired by sai-san's comic and nena-san's mini comic on Twitter (which got deleted). Warning; grab a tissue. It's a little heartbreaker. Warning; Major Character Death. Takes place at the end of chapter 204, so minor spoilers for that as well. AU from there. Played around with the title a little.
Quick note on the names that appear in the story; Akiko (秋子; autumn, child), Sumidairou (炭代郎; coal, generation, son), Daisuke (大輔; big/large, help), Chouko (蝶子; butterfly, child)
"There are so many…! We'll never get finished!" Zenitsu whined, "And it's already getting dark!"
"I'll do it fast!" Inosuke said, throwing flowers around while running.
"Show some respect! Do you want to get cursed!?" Zenitsu screamed.
Tanjirou and Nezuko laughed.
Despite Zenitsu's fears of not making it in time, they manage to say a prayer for everyone.
They were on their way to leave when Tanjirou looked back.
"Ah, there is something I need to do before we go." he said seriously, "I promise not to be long."
The other three turned to look at him.
"Don't worry, brother." Nezuko smiled kindly, "Take your time."
Tanjirou nodded once, before he took off back towards the graves.
"He still feels responsible for their deaths, doesn't he?" Zenitsu asked, somberly.
"Yes. One in particular."
"Shinobu-san?"
"Yes." Nezuko sighed.
"Why?"
"Because he could tell what she was feeling, he thinks he should have done more to help her."
"Oh."
xxxx
Tanjirou reached his destination in no time.
"It's me again." he said softly, "Um, I am sorry, but this time I'm here to talk just to Shinobu-san." he bowed to the rest of the Pillars, before sitting beside Shinobu-san's empty grave.
He drew in a deep breath.
"I, um, I want to apologise, first of all. I should have talked to you more. Maybe then I'd've been able to be of any help. So, please forgive me!" he bowed his head. Then he looked up again, "I…I brought you a present." he said softly, pulling out a small item from the sleeve of his haori, "I made it myself, too. Well, mostly. Nezuko helped me. My hands aren't what they used to be. So, it's not exactly like how I imagined it, but I think it still turned out pretty well. Here." he set it down by the flowers. It was a checkered purple butterfly hair clip, "I saw Kanao has your old one, so I thought you'd like a new one." he gave a watery smile, "I know what it means to give this kind of present to a woman and I want you to know that I don't expect an answer." he said softly, "Consider it as a 'thank you' gift, for all you did for me."
He looked up at the sky.
"I'm going to be sitting on the roof of my house and remember our talk. And I promise to visit you again, and I will keep in touch with Kanao, Aoi-san and the girls, make sure they are doing well. Even if it'll hurt at first, because they remind me of you, and that's a fairly new wound that hasn't healed just yet."
He sighed.
"Forgive me this weakness." he said, picking up his gift and making sure it won't get blown away, "I hope it'll look good." he looked up once more and got up, "It's getting late and I have a long road ahead. But I will be back, Shinobu-san. I want to see you again." he smiled sadly, "Rest well."
xxxx
"Everything all right?" Nezuko asked him.
"As well as they can be." he smiled sadly.
They started their journey to the Kamados' old home.
Saburo-ojii-san cried in relief when he saw the last two Kamados return.
The four of them cleaned it up and started living their new lives in a world without demons, but also without so many friends.
True to his promise, he kept in touch with the Butterfly Estate.
They invited their friends to Nezuko's and Zenitsu's wedding.
And Tanjirou would leave their home once every other month, not telling them where he was going. He didn't need to; they all knew where he was.
He kept going back. To the graveyard.
He would say a soft greeting to the rest of the Pillars and other corps members, only to sit beside Shinobu-san's grave and talk for hours.
Each time he brought different flowers.
But never wisteria.
"Whenever I smell wisteria now, I look around for Shinobu-san. And then I cry." he said softly on one of his visits, "It's terrible, Shinobu-san. Wisteria has such a gentle scent and I can't stand it anymore."
xxxx
He always told her his news.
"Ah, Shinobu-san! Nezuko and Zenitsu got married! That's why I didn't visit you in so long." he said, sheepishly, "I think the others might be mad with me, too. I only come to visit them once a year and here I am, almost once a month to see Shinobu-san." he chuckled, "I…also met someone. She looks a little like Shinobu-san, but not exactly. She lives in my village, too." he sighed, "She doesn't mind my hand or my eye – actually, no one at the village does. They are glad I am alive and came back safe."
He looked at the sky as a breeze blew.
"Shinobu-san. If I can, I want to meet you again. But, I'll try to live as much as I can during the time that's left for me. I think I am sure you'd prefer it than me holding on to your memory so much. But I won't forget you, Shinobu-san. Not ever. And that's a promise."
xxxx
His visits were always long, sometimes just a soft 'hello' and a strangely companionable silence.
"It's been five years since that day." he sighed, as he sat down by her grave, "I have a family now. But I won't be able to see them grow. Zenitsu wrote our story, in his own way. Nezuko made me write it as well. It'll be passed down in my family. I explain to the best of my ability the Dance of the Fire God, the Sun Breath. In five years, I will die." he stopped for a moment, "It's…weird to know that. Sanemi-san and Giyuu-san are already gone and Kiriya-kun is doing his best to support their families and his sisters. Shinobu-san? Can I be selfish for a moment? Can you wait for me? I know you must have moved on by now, but if you haven't…I want to see you again." he said softly, his fingers playing with the butterfly hairclip he had made for her with Nezuko's help, "I should have asked you to wait earlier, so I might be too late, but…" he smiled sadly, "You must know me well enough by now."
xxxx
"I'm glad this is still here." he said one day, picking up the hairclip, "It helps me think Shinobu-san is sitting with me." he placed it back down, making sure it won't get loose, "I won't be long; I can feel my body weakening with each passing second. I wonder if my father died because he was marked, as well." he looked up at the sky, "Many times I wondered why Shinobu-san didn't entrust me with her plan to avenge her sister. Many times I got angry about it. And then I reminded myself that Shinobu-san didn't owe me anything to tell me. The only reason she told me about her anger was because I smelt it. If I had asked about the wisteria scent, she would lie, wouldn't she?" he wiped his eyes, "Why wouldn't Shinobu-san trust me? I might have been able to help you." he cried.
xxxx
"Hello, Shinobu-san." he sighed, heavily, "I am sorry to say, but this will be my last visit to you. I don't have the strength to make the journey anymore. I am using my breath to manage and stay upright." he chuckled a little, coughing right after, "My father said once that if I managed to breathe the right way, I could dance throughout the night without getting tired and become the Fire God. And I don't know about becoming the Fire God, but I danced, Shinobu-san. All through the night. For nine years, I did the dance." he said proudly, "I have two sons and one daughter. I am sorry I never introduced them to you. Sumidairou is the eldest. He will inherit the earrings. The dance is for all of them. Then it's Daisuke and last but not least Chouko." he ran his fingers across Shinobu's name, "Sorry, I never asked your permission for that." he sighed, leaning against the tombstone, "I'm glad I got to meet you. And I am sorry, but this is goodbye. The others know already, but I left you for last. You know, I think I would have loved you, if I was given the time and the chance. I think I can admit that now, here, at the end. And I think I want to get an answer now, Shinobu-san." running his fingers over the hair ornament. Slowly, he got to his feet, "I'll be seeing you soon, I hope."
xxxx
It was late at night and Tanjirou was sitting on the veranda of his house, leaning against a wall. Akiko and his children were asleep inside. Something was calling him out, so here he was, waiting for that something.
Suddenly a purple butterfly landed on his nose for a second, as if to kiss it, before flying away.
Tanjirou followed it with his eyes, only for more butterflies to fly by him, all of them touching his face with their wings as they passed by.
"The moon is beautiful tonight, isn't it?" a familiar voice said, "Good evening, Tanjirou-kun."
Tanjirou's head wiped around, coming face to face with a pair of purple eyes standing too close to his. He felt tears in his left eye.
"Shinobu-san…?" he asked softly, afraid he was finally losing his mind.
"Were you expecting someone else?" the former Insect Pillar smiled.
"I wasn't expecting anyone." Tanjirou replied truthfully, "But I am glad I could see you again." he smiled, "Ah! My gift!" he exclaimed suddenly, noticing her hair pin.
"You were waiting for answer, were you not?" she smiled.
Tanjirou blushed, but didn't look away.
"Look at you, you matured so much!" she teased him.
"I lost too much time not seeing Shinobu-san by turning away my face when she teased me. I won't do the same mistake again, not now that I can see her again."
Shinobu cupped his face, bringing hers closer until she was a breath away from his lips.
"The answer is 'yes'." she whispered, giving him a kiss.
Tanjirou smiled softly.
"I am sorry about your arm and eye." she said, sitting down beside him.
Tanjirou raised his left hand and looked at it.
"I would have gladly given both my arms if it would mean I got to save you and the others. I would give up being able to hold you, if it meant you'd get to be alive."
Shinobu rested her head on his shoulder and sighed.
"It is a beautiful night." she said, "Did you have a good, full life?"
"Yes."
"I am glad."
"I will die tonight, won't I? That's why Shinobu-san is here?"
"Yes."
"I smiled a lot and I laughed a lot. I never forgot to keep my smile. I never stayed sad for long and even if I cried, a lot of times it was from happiness." he smiled, wrapping his arm around her shoulders, holding her closer.
"I'm glad."
He leaned back, against the wall, and closed his eyes.
He thinks he fell asleep.
"Tanjirou-kun."
"Shinobu-san?" he blinked awake.
She was standing before him, holding a hand out to him.
"It's time." she smiled.
He smiled back, taking her hand, letting her pull him to his feet.
When morning came and they found Tanjirou, two butterflies, a red and a purple one, flew off from his shoulder.