Sorry for the slight delay in getting this posted, I have been unwell for the last couple of weeks and even writing was too much for me.
A quick heads up for some mental health issues.
I have picked out the most common craving during pregnancy that I got feedback for... it's totally gross btw.
There's a little shout out to the 'Golden Girls' in this chapter if anyone can find it :P
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It was almost three in the afternoon and Regina had just worked her first lunch shift with Pierre at Mal's restaurant. Now she was having a break before they had to start prepping for dinner service. She made herself a strawberry and rocket salad with a balsamic vinaigrette and grabbed her phone from the locker she had been assigned so she could call Emma and keep her promise to let her know how her day was going.
The blonde had driven her to work that morning and was loath to be separated from Regina, particularly because of the amazing time they'd had the week prior in London, followed by a weekend at home in which they barely left their bedroom.
Regina unlocked her phone and found a text from Emma waiting for her along with a missed call from David. Given how wonderful the last few weeks had been she had almost forgotten she had asked his colleague to find out about her mother. Her gut clenched at the thought of the evil woman. She would call David back after she finished work, she didn't want anything he had to say ruining her first day at work.
She opened the text from Emma that had come through about half an hour after she had been dropped off, she knew it would have been the very first thing Emma had done when she got home. "I hope your first day goes great. The diners will have never tasted anything so amazing in all their lives as the food you make. Take it easy and let me know when you need a lift home. Love you both so much xxx"
She couldn't stop the smile that blossomed on her face, she would never tire of Emma's sweet reminders of just how much she cared for her and their baby.
She tapped on Emma's name and on the second ring she was greeted by the breathless blonde. "Hey, sweetheart, how is your shift going?" Regina could hear the happiness in her fiancées voice just to be speaking to her, it never failed to make her feel special.
"Hello, darling. It's going really well. I'm only really helping out with prepping the food but Pierre said that once I get used to being in a working kitchen environment he will give me my own station."
"That's brilliant! It will be the best station in the whole kitchen," Emma boasted with pride.
Regina had to chuckle, she could tell Emma that she was serving peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and the blonde would still think it was the best thing ever. "What are you doing with your day?"
"I'm just in the gym, still trying to work off the vacation weight. I ate way too much fish and chips in London." Regina couldn't see but Emma was patting her very slim and defined stomach, as if she was anything but fit and healthy.
"I'm pretty sure I helped you work off all those extra calories in the last few days," Regina whispers into the phone, even though she was the only one in the staff room because Pierre had insisted that she had a break even though everyone else still had to work.
"Mmmm, yeah, you did," she smiles to herself as she remembers the weekend they spent in bed together, "but you're not here right now so I have had to take matters into my own hands... so to speak," she quickly adds when she realises what that sounds like.
Regina laughs around the forkful of food she is chewing on, more out of necessity for their baby's health than her appetite, and decides to let that slip, rather than tease her fiancée. "I've had a missed call from David," she reluctantly changes the subject to the important issue.
"Oh… are you okay?" Regina could hear the lack of a smile behind the blondes words.
"Yes, I just don't want to think about it right now. I'll call him back when I get home. I just wanted to let you know." She didn't want to bring it up but when it came to Emma a problem shared was a problem halved.
"Okay, we can do that when you get home. Don't worry about it. No matter what, everything will be okay." Emma promised.
Regina could hear that beautiful smile behind the words once again and it eased the tension thrumming in her body. "Thank you," she said as she took another bite of her salad, now feeling like she had more of an appetite than she did before calling Emma. They kept chatting, but about lighter subjects until it was time for Regina to go back to work.
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"So, come on, tell me all about your first day," Emma proudly asks as she buckles herself into the drivers seat. She had just picked Regina up after a twelve hour shift and couldn't wait to hear all about it. She reaches over the centre console and entwines their fingers together.
"It was really good. Tiring but good." She still couldn't quite believe that she had a normal job and even more unbelievable to her was that she had someone that wanted to know all about it. "I had a bit of free time so I made a batch of your favourite scones and Pierre loved them. He wants to add them to the brunch menu. All the other chefs liked them too." There hadn't been many occasions in her life where she had been proud of herself but this was definitely one of them.
"That's amazing! I'm not surprised though, they are something special," she proudly beams as she pulls Regina's hand to her mouth so she could kiss the back of it. "Did you manage to…"
"Yes, I snagged a couple of them for you," Regina answers, reading the blondes mind.
"Awesome!" Emma exclaims.
Once they arrive home Emma prepares them both a cup of tea and Regina goes about slicing the scones and adding cream and strawberry jelly on Emma's two. She prepares her own scone in the same way, except she didn't like it with jelly as she thought it took away from the apple and cinnamon flavour. They sat at the dining table and Emma took a massive bite of one of her scones, moaning as all the different flavours and textures merged in her mouth. Her foot started bouncing against the floor, a sure sign of how much she was enjoying the treat.
Not even Pierre or any of her new colleagues praise meant as much to her as Emma's bouncing leg as she demolished the first scone. Regina took a small bite of her own but something was missing. It was the same recipe she always used but for some reason it just wasn't hitting the spot. "This needs something," she says out loud.
"Jelly," Emma confidently informs her as the brunette gets up to look in the fridge.
"No, that's not it," she browses the frigid shelves, hoping that the answer would pop up. "Ah… this should do it," she smiles happily as she takes out a jar of pickles.
Emma's face morphs into one of disgust as Regina brings the jar of pickles and the knife she had used to cut the scones to the table. The brunette starts chopping them up and then places a thick player of them on top of the cream and replacing the top half of the scone before taking another bite. "Much better," she moans after swallowing her small mouthful.
"What has been seen cannot be unseen," Emma says in revulsion..
"It's your child who wants this food," Regina informs her before taking another very satisfying bite.
Emma's face softens as the mention of their child and she puts her scone back on the plate, quickly wiping her hands on her jeans before she puts them on her lovers stomach. "I guess the cravings are starting to kick in then? Hey, my little one," she directs to Regina's stomach, "I promise you that jelly is a much nicer addition to your mom's scones than pickles are," she pulls another disgusted face to back up her point.
"We don't believe you," Regina nonchalantly says before taking another bite of her cream and pickle scone.
"I bet Pierre isn't going to be serving your scones with pickles for the weekend brunch menu."
Regina laughs and allows herself to be awash with happiness as they both finish off their preferred topped scones.
"Do you think it's too late to call David back now?" It was almost eleven and Emma had just finished clearing the dishes away, and as much as Regina didn't want to face calling him and discovering what he had found out about her mother, she knew she had to.
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Regina anxiously drums her fingers on the arm of the sofa as she waits for David to answer her call. Emma is sitting next to her and reaches around her back to take the nervous hand and hold it, the only support she can offer her lover who is about to find out what had become of the heartless woman that sold her own flesh and blood into a life of torture and pain.
"Hello," an exhausted and irritable David answers briskly.
"Hello, David. Is this a bad time?" The brunette tentatively asks.
"Sorry. Hello, Regina. It's not a bad time. Thanks for calling me back." He scolds himself for not looking at the screen before answering the call. It had been a bitch of a day and a couple of leads on a big case had come to nothing so he wasn't in the best of moods but his voice automatically softened when he realised it was Regina calling him back. He hastily walks to the sanctuary of his office, closing the door on the madness of his department behind him. "I have some news on your... on Cora Mills." He had to quickly change direction and not refer to the woman as her mother, he didn't think she deserved that title.
Regina takes a deep breath and feels Emma squeeze her hand a little tighter. "I'm just going to put you on speaker so Emma can hear what is being said." She does just that and lays her phone on the coffee table.
"No problem. Hi, Emma." He calls out.
"Hey, David." She greets politely and to the point. She would normally ask him how he was doing or make some sort of small talk but she could feel the tension coming of Regina in waves and so she wanted to get this over as quickly as possible for Regina's sake.
"So I'll just get right to it." He states, taking the hint. "We have tracked Cora down, she's in a care home called Shady Pines, just on the outskirts of Storybrooke." He goes quiet for a moment before gently sighing, "I'm sorry to tell you but she has dementia." The woman in question disgusted him for how she had treated her own daughter but he didn't know how Regina would take the news of the woman's suffering.
Regina's gut twists when she hears her mother is close by and then it rolls when she hears she has dementia. She has no idea how to feel about that. A small part of her had hoped that she would be told her mother had passed away, just so she didn't have to worry about her, even though that thought filled her with guilt. She hadn't known what to expect but this certainly hadn't been it at all.
Emma watches as Regina rubs at her temples as if trying to stave off a headache before acknowledging David. "Thank you for doing this for us, we really appreciate it," she says as a way to end the conversation so she can comfort her pregnant fiancée in privacy.
"Not a problem. You have my number if you need anything else," he offers them before hanging up, sensing it wasn't prudent for him to stay on the line any longer, especially given Regina's silence since he broke the news to her.
"I've got you," Emma promises as Regina burrows her face under the blondes chin, her shoulders rising and falling as she silently cries into Emma's neck. The blonde holds her close and kisses the crown of her head, turning silent and letting her feel her minefield of emotions.
Unlike Regina she had completely hoped the wicked woman was dead. That would have been the best news she could have heard, but this wasn't about what she wanted. This was about Regina and what she had just been told. There were no words she could attempt to vocalise that would make this situation easier or would soothe her love. All she could do was be there for her and comfort her in whatever way she needed.
A little later on, once the tears had stopped and they had both gone through their nightly routine of washing and brushing their teeth, Emma held the cover back so her lover could climb into bed and fall into her arms. Not much was said as Regina continued to try to process the news and Emma worried herself over the brunettes wellbeing. Each time the tears would start falling anew from brown eyes, Emma would hold her a little tighter and repeatedly promise to take care of her, it was all she could do.
As dawn broke Emma tried to convince Regina to take the day off work, she was on a shorter shift today anyway. The brunette was exhausted from her shift the day before, never mind the lack of sleep and the news she was still trying to get her head around. Regina was having none of it though, she wanted the distraction that the work day would bring. She promised Emma she would take it easy and that she would make sure she ate properly throughout the day, and she also agreed to having a session with Archie that evening if Emma was able to arrange it.
Emma did manage to arrange it. Archie would be coming over later that night. She had gotten an appointment for eight, which would give Regina just enough time for a bath and a nap after work if she so chose to. Emma also text Kat to ask her when she would be coming back, luckily the blonde had no plans to return from Ruby's that day so that gave them a little more space until they could figure out their next step.
Emma spent nearly all of her day in the home gym trying to work off her worry and stress until it was time for her to pick Regina up from work.
"How was your day?" Emma asks as she greets Regina with a chaste kiss to her cheek and opens the car door for her.
"It was fine. I didn't have any spare time to make you anything. Sorry." It wasn't expected that she always bring a treat home for Emma but she felt like it was all she had to offer her.
"Don't be silly," Emma says with a small smile as she takes her hand, "I just want to know that you had a good day. Besides, I don't think I could handle watching you eat another pickle scone. Yuck."
Regina smiles at that. "Work was good but I just can't clear my head. Thank you for organising the appointment with Archie. I think it will help me to talk with him."
"Not a problem. If you'd like I could run you a bath when we get home, it might help you to unwind a little," she offers her still tense looking partner.
"Only if you join me," she counter-offers, knowing that would cheer up the blonde. She was aware that Emma was putting on an act to be strong for her and that the athlete was also hurting and stressed with the news but she wouldn't let it show.
"If you insist," she toothily grins, the first genuine smile on her face since the call with David the night before.
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Regina steps into the hot water and sits down between Emma's legs, her back against the blondes front. Emma's hands immediately seek out Regina's still flat stomach and rest there, as they have had a tendency to do since they found out they were expecting. Emma kisses her shoulder, her lips lingering on the soft skin of her lover as a way to comfort her.
"I'm sorry to drag you into more drama," Regina apologises as she places her hands over Emma's.
"Don't apologise. I'm in this with you. Whatever comes our way we can face it together. I know I say it a lot but things will be okay. Everything will work itself out in the end. We are together, the three of us. That's all that matters."
Regina turns her head so she can kiss the sweet lips that always know the right words to say to reassure her that no matter what happens her life will never return to what it once was. She is safe and loved now and with Emma by her side she could face anything.
"I have to visit her. I don't want to but I have to do it. I need to do it," She sternly says, seemingly out of nowhere.
"Okay. Whatever you decide I am by your side."
The session with Archie went well and it cemented Regina's determination to face her past. She'd had some major reservations because of Cora's diagnosis but Archie had helped her understand that it was about facing her own demons, literally, no matter the condition of the woman. Whatever happened when they met again couldn't be any worse than the hundreds of scenarios Regina's mind would concoct if she didn't do this and would always keep wondering what if.
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"Are you sure you're ready for this?" Emma looks over at Regina who is staring blankly out of the windscreen towards the stone building that houses the woman they are there to visit.
"No, but I need to do this. I need to see her with my own eyes and face her. I know she won't be the woman I remember but once I've done this I can put her in the past and we can focus on out future." She says with a firm shake of her head as her hands go to her stomach. She didn't want to do this, not at all. She wanted to run away. That wasn't an option though, not now that she was pregnant. She was doing this for her family. The final piece of her past had to be laid to rest and this was her way of doing just that. Just to be on the safe side she had booked a session with Archie later that evening. She had seen him every day for the past week since the call from David and she would continue to do so for as long as she needed to, according to Emma.
They make their way up the small, winding path that leads to the entrance of the building, hand in hand. When they reach the door Regina self-consciously pulls her hand away and offers Emma an apologetic smile. It wasn't because they were in public, it was because of who they were visiting and what that woman was like. She wasn't eighteen anyore but she could still feel the pull the woman had over her. Emma understands. She offers her a weak smile and holds the door open for the smaller woman to enter first.
Regina gives her name at the reception, except it isn't her name, not yet anyway. "Mrs Regina Swan to see Cora Mills." She hadn't intended to give the wrong name, it was a moment of panic. "I'm her niece and I'm with Emma, we are both here to see Cora Mills," she rambles on nervously, not wanting to admit she was actually her daughter but she knew she had to make up a good reason for her visit.
Once they were signed in they wait patiently on a couple of the plastic chairs that press up against the far wall of the waiting room, for a member of staff to escort them to Cora's room.
"I want you to come with me," Regina blurts out in a whisper. The original plan had been for Emma to drop her off but the blonde hadn't felt comfortable with that and had managed to persuade her to let her stay. She didn't want to be too far away from her fiancée and child when Regina was meeting the reason her life had been so awful. So the plan had been for Emma to stay in the waiting room until Regina had finished the visit but the brunette had apparently changed her mind.
"To her room?"
"Yes, please."
"Of course I will. As long as you are sure?"
"Yes. I need you with me. I can't do this without you."
"Okay. I'll come with you. I'm happy to." She has to stop herself from reaching out to comfort her lover. She wants to take her in her arms and hold her close, physical contact always steadies them both but Regina has taken that off the table for now.
"Mrs Swan?" A matronly but kind looking woman greets as she approaches them.
Emma looks at Regina in confusion before they both stand up and Regina introduces them both, "That's me, Mrs Swan, her great niece. Is it okay for Emma to come with me?" She could feel Emma's eyes burning into the side of the face, she'll deal with her questions later. One thing at a time.
"I'm Polly and of course you can both visit Cora. I just want to warn you both that your aunt may not be as you remember her. Her mind isn't what it once was. She doesn't talk very much at all and when she does it is one word answers. It's a degenerative disease but your aunt seems happy enough and the medicine she gets keeps her on an even keel." she says with a smile but she leads them through a myriad of corridors that take them to Cora's room.
The door was ajar and Polly gives it a polite knock but doesn't wait for a reply as she pushes it open to reveal Cora sitting in a high backed armchair and staring mindlessly out of her bedroom window. Emma has her hand on Regina's back, the only thing she knew would offer the brunette some comfort without being overly affectionate. She felt Regina stiffen as she as she laid eyes on the frail looking woman. She was small and hunched over, no one would ever be able to guess the evil she was capable of just by looking for her. Emma would almost feel sorry for her if she hadn't been privy to the nastiness inside of her.
Polly approaches Cora and squats in front of her so they are at eye level. "Cora, you have some visitors. Your nieces, Regina and Emma Swan." She had seen the form at reception and had come to her own conclusions about the two women both being Cora's nieces.
Now Emma was really confused, she would have to ask Regina later what exactly she had put on the check-in form. On the plus side, Polly was completely oblivious to who she was. Even if she had been aware of who she was she would be subject to a secrecy form through her employment but it was even better that she didn't have any clue.
"I'll leave you all to it," Polly says with a smile as she leaves the room, unaware of the awkwardness she is leaving behind.
Regina and Emma quickly glance at each other, neither of them sure what to do as Cora continues to stare out of the window. Emma stays near the door and Regina slowly moves further into the room and takes the chair opposite Cora's, a small coffee table with a cup of tea on it is the only thing separating them. She's shaking but she's doing her best not to show it as she looks at her mother. Her eyes and mouth are more prominently lined than the last time she had seen her but her hair and makeup were just as immaculate as she remembered. She said nothing as her eyes raked over her. She fought against the anger and sadness bubbling up inside her. She didn't want to get stressed, not when she had her baby growing inside of her. It was almost a full two minutes later when the tears started rolling down her cheeks. She had tried to figure out what she was feeling the most; anger or sadness, but her overriding emotions weren't either of those. It was betrayal and abandonment that throbbed in her veins and twisted her gut.
Emma stepped forward when she noticed the first tear trickle down Regina's cheek but a small hand held up, silently asking her to give her space, was enough to stop her in her tracks. She stands still but her eyes watch Regina like a hawk. The lack of touching between them when her lover was suffering was almost physically painful to her but she always promised herself that she would never be one of the people that took away any of Regina's choices so she acquiesced and solemnly stays back.
"Cora…" Regina whispers as she wipes the tears from her cheeks. She couldn't bear to call her 'mother' or any such term of endearment. "Cora?" She repeats a little louder and it seems to do the trick because for the first time since she entered the room the old woman looks her in the eyes. There is a vacant look behind deep brown orbs but it's still enough to send a shiver down Regina's spine. Those eyes had always been cold and calculating and even though her mind was gone, those eyes held the same power they always had. "I know you don't remember me but we once knew each other and I just came here because," she wipes away at the fresh tears that track down her face, "I want to let you know that I forgive you. I forgive you, but not because you deserve forgiveness. I forgive you because I deserve to let go of it all."
Emma was radiating pride. They hadn't really delved into too much detail about what the brunette wanted to say to Cora so Emma was hearing it all for the first time too.
The words fly over Cora's head as if they weren't said at all. Regina knows she won't get any answers but she stays sitting and staring at Cora, silently processing her own feelings.
Slowly and feebly Cora reaches for her porcelain cup that was half filled with lukewarm tea, with a shaky hand. She grips the handle and the liquid swishes up the sides as she lifts the cup. Regina looks over to Emma for the first time since she sat down and they smile at each other weakly. The crash of the cup after it falls from frail fingers and smashes against the coffee table, sending shards of porcelain and warm liquid over both of the women, the majority of it hitting Regina because of the way the cup fell, has Emma rushing over to the younger brunette.
"Are you okay, sweetheart? Are you burnt or cut?" She asks in concern as she checks over her partner. Neither of them paid any attention to Cora who had also been splashed with the tea but hadn't really reacted to it, she just sat back in the chair.
"I'm fine. It's barely warm," she sighs. It was just so typical that something had to go against her today. I'll go tidy up in the bathroom, there are some tissues over there," she points to a small box of tissues on the side cupboard, "would you mind cleaning her up a bit?"
"Sure," she agrees as she reaches for the box as Regina goes into the en suite bathroom to clean herself up.
"I'm just going to dab up some of the splashes," she explains to the shell of a woman as she pulls out a few tissues. She didn't know if Cora understood any of what she was saying but it felt wrong to just start touching her without explaining what she was doing. She leans it to dry up the largest splash on the woman's skirt.
Before Emma know what is happening a bony hand is wrapped around her wrist and steely eyes are glaring daggers at her. "I've been waiting for you. We need to talk."
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Do you guys have a preference for the sex of their baby? I know the usual thing is for them to have a boy and name him Henry but I quite like the idea of them having a girl. I'll let you lot decide and go with that :D