"Deploying in three minutes everyone! Happy hunting!" Over the gathered chatting servants, David's announcement boomed over the speakers in the Deployment Room. Battle-clad, but otherwise relaxed, most servants mingled around their chosen pads. A few still talked happily with the battlesuit-clad Gabrielle and Gudao, while a scarce few still loitered on the large walkway; It wouldn't be for long.
"Let's go cultivate lots of new land, Papa!" Raikou giggled as Paul raced past with a childish grin and eyes filled with stars. Arash jogged past the gathered trio with a wave and signature grin while he chased the little American berserker. Raikou merely watched after them for a few extra seconds and admired their family; Oh how she pined for days when her children were that small and cute. But her current reality wasn't so terrible.
Raikou stood as the lone servant dressed casually; She wasn't deploying, but one of her precious children was. In a red qipao dress with a sakura floral pattern, she stood before her muscular child. He made a glance back towards the others, but she wasn't going to hold them up. As much as she didn't want to see him go alone, he was a big boy and could handle himself. With a smile of diamond glints, she raised her little wrapped lunch.
"Here you go! I packed you some rice balls today so you won't get hungry on your sortie~! Parvati even added some of her special soy sauce!"
An embarrassed Kintoki slowly took the box from Raikou with a carefully crafted smile that hid his embarrassment. Mostly. He nodded in thanks, but the tall berserker quickly turned her warm smile towards Fuuma beside him. He stiffened instinctively, but Raikou could never understand why. Was there anything to ever fear when she was happy? "Be a good friend and watch over my little Kintoki, okay, Fuuma? Don't let him get into any trouble! You know how he loves being a hero."
"M-Mother…" Oh gosh how she loved that her dear child called her that now! After a lifetime of trying, it was like a sprinkled, misty pile of delicious ice cream scoops covered in chocolate. Even months after he first used that title, it still sent shivers up her spine to blossom in her heart with the sun's radiance. Even the little embarrassed look he gave her reminded her so much of when he was younger.
"Oh, Kintoki, Kintoki… Forever a child~…" she mused happily as she quickly pressed herself against him in a warm embrace. He squirmed in that adorable way she always loved when she softly ran her hand along his side. Even her little affectionate nuzzle into his neck made him stiffen cutely. Some things changed slowly; He still had a way to go before he was used to such a simple motherly hug. "Don't make your mother worry, okay~?"
"Yes, Mother…" he replied while his cheeks remained a field of pink poppies. He fired a desperate plea to his ninja friend, but Fuuma could only stare back helplessly with an apologetic smile. Thankfully, Raikou released her hug and patted Kintoki and Fuuma on the heads. Freed from her grip, Kintoki let out a sigh, then his signature grin. "Everything will be golden!"
"I'm sure it will be," Raikou giggled and waved as they walked off. Her heart filled with giddy warmth; She felt like a true mother after dropping her child off from school. In Chaldea, she always mused she was a bit like a stay at home mother or a part time worker with her Peacekeeper position. Often, she wished things were far more mundane than they usually were, but it was… satisfying, even with all blights considered.
But Raikou couldn't help it. It was her motherly devotion that desired everything to be perfect for her children and their friends…
…even though she was far from that herself.
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Fragment 90: What Lies Just Beneath
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"Good afternoon, ma'dam."
"You too," Raikou returned elegantly as she strolled down Chaldea's famed windowed hallway. Her poise was elegant, but her smile was the epitome of motherly grace. Even if her dress hugged her bountiful curves dangerously, she was no street walker. A refined leader and legend of the Minamoto clan, she had a reputation and name to uphold. Nevertheless, it was naturally easy for her to keep up such sophisticated grace while her motherly charm kept her approachable.
That much was obvious, because she'd practiced that ideal image for so long it was as easy as drawing her blade with a killing blow. Many in Chaldea sometimes said she had other problems, but she never saw that. She could only believe it as hearsay or even jealousy that they couldn't be as graceful as her. It wasn't their fault, but she was merely the well-versed balance of Japanese elegance, motherly affection, and warrior prestige.
Yet, she still kept an open ear about the criticisms and remarks.
The paranoia remained, as did her shame. It was why she always avoided her reflection when she could. Walking down the windowed hallway always made her heart beat faster, but her eyes remained trained and focused forward. She didn't even mind the two new passing employees that had just arrived this week, who eyed her curves before and after she passed. She couldn't even wave to the gentle giant Sergei, who stared out the windows in a trance as his second in command talked with two other soldiers standing at attention. No, she was more concerned about an accidental glance at her reflection on that blizzard-filled afternoon.
Every glance into her own eyes shook her with tremors that could level a metropolis. It was difficult enough looking at herself in the mirror every morning just to ensure her wardrobe was on perfectly. Anything more bombarded her mind with the worst of realities. So she kept her gaze forward, greeted every passerby as a welcome distraction, and kept moving purposefully forward to the resort.
She had a meeting she wanted to be early for.
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Since Raikou's stroll was quick, she was even earlier than planned. To spend the extra bit of time, she made a small detour through the Agora. From there, it'd just take an extra few minutes to walk through the arcade to arrive in Club Cove. But it was minutes well spent as the bright, sunny atmosphere of the Greek-themed mall brought her to another world. Though she preferred the aesthetics of her homeland, the world's many cultures offered exotics blends like fine drinks.
She passed a glance to the Stitch Witches' store which bustled with light activity. Some employees were relaxing at the fountain for a quick break from work. Astolfo and Flat's laughter could be heard echoing from the classroom while Jeanne and Martha disappeared down the small religious corridor. It was quaint and peaceful, which made every breath an elixir of life.
This was part of her world now. A place that took her in without concern, and rarely asked questions of one's origin. So long as they played civil, there was a place for a servant. It was a notion she questioned countless times, for if she ran this place, some would have been evicted outright without trial. But the potential hypocrisy of her statement was not lost on her; Yet, she still wished for every blight to be cleansed.
That's why her desire to remedy every problem was stacked high. Any sore spot in this world that welcomed her had to be resolved. She didn't wish to see this disappear or crumble… Not this facility that let her be so close to her children and so accepted by many. They treated her respectfully like a normal person, even if nearly all were unaware of her deepest sin. It warmed her heart, and compounded her determination that any potential for ruin must be removed.
…If only it were as easy as drawing her blade and slicing through every insect and disease in sight, but it wasn't. 'If only…'
No, as much as she relished in more direct solutions, Chaldea solved their internal problems through dialogue, appeasement, and compromise. This small meeting was just another. Yet it was one of many involving one problem that still had no definite answer. That wouldn't sit well with her. No, not at all.
After strolling through the Arcade in thought, ignoring the gamers within, she took her first steps into Club Cove and stopped. It was nearly empty, but that was an oddity she wasn't concerned with. Outside the windows, there was more activity on the boardwalk as Chaldeans set up the week-long Halloween festival. Chacha, or she believed it was, ran past the windows with a stack of fuzzy spiders, which was followed quickly by Tyler's girlish scream. It graced her with a tiny giggle, but her resolve hardened her stare when she found her target.
Without second pause, she strolled over to one of the booths on the far side of the dance floor. Hessian turned his shoulders squarely towards her in a show of acknowledgement, but she only took her seat across from him. He wore a crisp, tailored brown suit that was reminiscent of the Victorian age. It may have been just his taste, but she was glad she dressed up. It made it feel like he was taking this meeting seriously.
Heaven knows, she was doing just that. "How are you today, Franz? Or more specifically, how is Lobo."
"Right to the chase, I see." His telepathic message was polite and refined; He didn't even flinch under her growing, powerful gaze. Even if Anishka was supposed to be here before they started, she couldn't help herself. Her protective motherly instincts were a wildfire. She heard his mental sigh. "I'm afraid it's the same as always. He still refuses to talk to anyone, even me. But he hasn't attacked anyone either."
"Not yet." Her words were a curt warning and the honest truth of her feelings. They were an avenger pair, and there was no mistaking the tale of Lobo. His hatred rested with humanity, and that vengeance for its cruel fate was likely unfathomable; Hessian's aura of malice was a pool to his lake. It was a miracle it wasn't causing trouble, but she wasn't about to let her guard down. So long as it was hostile, the glass floor could shatter.
"You're his partner. I don't believe you're doing as much as you can to make him cooperate, and that needs to change."
"We're our own individuals, Raikou… I can't force that beast to do anything. I fear that may only agitate it further."
"Raikou… Please be nice to Franz. He's stressed about this too." The sweltering devotion within shook with the comforting beats of her heart. Her unyielding gaze lightened as she turned beside her, where Anishka gently took a seat. She wanted to coo in delight yet again at how lovely her child looked in her ocean blue, cross-necked dress. Her calm but pleading eyes tore into her soul, and Raikou could barely hold herself back from hugging her. "He's doing his best when we're struggling for solutions."
"Ohhh~! Forgive your mother!" Before Anishka could voice an objection, Raikou wrapped her in the warm hug she always secretly loved. With her face buried in her bountiful bosom, she could only voice muffled requests. Hessian looked a bit uncomfortable and uncertain, but possibly a bit relieved? It was hard to tell until he spoke. Raikou paid little heed, but pleaded back. "I'm just so worried about anything that could happen to you and dear Kintoki! Let your mother worry! Please!"
After realizing she wasn't going to get a straight answer, she released Anishka. The blushing master quickly sat straight, tried to smooth her hair as the berserker helped, and caught her flustered breath. "…Sorry… I know you're trying to help. That's what this meeting is for. I want to make sure you're aware of the whole situation."
"Oh, but you didn't need to come. Your mother could handle herself just fine! I'm good with negotiations!"
Anishka paused in hesitation, but offered a small smile; Raikou failed to register the veiled concern and doubt. "I just want to be sure things don't get out of hand. This isn't something that can be forced. There's nothing worse than a cornered animal."
"But if it runs free in its current temperament, I fear what might happen. Someone may lose their life." Raikou was quick to reestablish her concerns. She had to be.
"And I understand that. You're not the only one concerned. I am ultimately responsible for Lobo, as he is for me," Hessian agreed, and she fell a bit curious over the man. Her doubt remained unmoved by his reassurance, but she had to wonder just how in control the headless horseman was over his own natural wrath. He always seemed pleasant enough, if not annoyingly wrapped in an aura of malice and dread.
"I answered the call to assist, regardless of my own… reservations and wrath. You'll have to pardon me while I grow accustomed to it like my fellows… but alas, I can do naught so long as my partner refuses to join the fight."
"But Lobo came too, and he's still not going away. So he must have his own reason for coming," Anishka commented as she looked to the berserker. "That's what we've been trying to find out, but he's not talking to anyone anymore."
The idea of others approaching the angry wolf and further agitating it didn't sit well with Raikou. If it were her decision, she'd just have it under constant watch and executed on the next mock charge. Chaldea had plenty of reliable servants anyway, and were still getting more. Lobo and Hessian would be no real loss with powerful heroes like her around.
Yet, she couldn't help but admire Kintoki and Anishka's determination. Her children seemed very content to give the wolf a chance, and her son was even suggesting he tried talking to the wolf instead. She didn't like that idea at all, but that conviction and optimism never failed to make her smile. Where adults were jaded, children still dared to believe. It warmed her heart like a hearth under winter's cloak.
Being a supporting mother, she often held her own demands in check to spoil their visions. This would be the same, if reluctantly. She sighed with mild discontent, "Then why don't we just leave that thing alone? Dantes and Joan grew more relaxed in Chaldea with time, did they not?"
"That's what Gudao and Da Vinci are suggesting," Hessian replied, but then squared his shoulders to Anishka as a prompt.
She nodded, but then sighed. "The cape will be off limits for Halloween, but there should be enough of the forest for the haunted house. The children really wanted to see that."
"And the cute dearies will, even if I have to stand guard all night between them and Lobo!" Raikou firmly declared.
"Um, thank you, Raikou, but… we'll have other volunteer guards so you can enjoy yourself too." Again, it seemed Anishka was hesitant to place her trust in her. She never could understand why. Everything she did was with the best of everyone in mind, especially her children. She couldn't see anything she did as wrong; Was a mother not supposed to go to extremes to care for them? It hurt her whenever they doubted or disagreed with her will. Often, it made her tear up.
Instinctively, her child's words repeated in her mind endlessly until it clicked. Oh! It wasn't meant as disrespect for a mother's love! Oh, how silly of her to misunderstand. "Oh, Annie, Annie~… Still too embarrassed around your mother to say things outright! Such a shy child, but worry not! I'll help Okita pick perfect volunteers to watch over Lobo so we can spend Halloween together! You, me, and Kintoki~!"
"W-Wait, Raikou! That's-!" Anishka couldn't respond before she was once more smothered in Raikou's breasts.
"Ohhhh, you're so sweet! So thoughtful of your mother!" She still remembered when the master struggled more to free herself from her grip. Ever since she was so brave and daring enough to come out with her true sexuality, she struggled just that much less. Oh, she knew she loved it, but a mother was more than willing to offer her child some extra warmth until she got herself a lovely woman Raikou personally approved of.
Yet, much of her secretly feared what may happen if that already unworthy person did appear to claim her dear child.
Until then and after, she would always fuss over this master and fear losing her affection. Like Kintoki, she'd keep her safe, and hoped she never strayed away from her warmth. She was so sweet and fragile, and it almost broke her heart when she embraced the crying woman after she came out to her. She was one of the first to be told, and she was supportive all the while for her brave child. She was even willing to draw her blade against any who dared make her cry for who she truly was.
But it was her soft reassurances that 'mother will always love her for who she is' which ushered the saddest of tears and wails from Anishka; It was terrible to feel the heartbroken sobs wet her clothes. Yet, it warmed her heart that she pined for her mother's acceptance so much. But it wasn't surprising. No, Raikou knew all too well how much acceptance could mean to someone, and offered it wholly to the master in need.
Without a doubt, that very concept was what kept her up for many nights during the past few months, sometimes with tears in her eyes.
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Like the blizzard outside Chaldea, the winds in the resort were running free. It wasn't strong enough to cart away the fine grains of warm sand, but gave life to the children's kites; Their little laughter was better than any coffee. Beneath the swift-moving clouds, the kites of all assortments waved and waggled as their controllers kept them safely apart. She watched a green one shaped like a cartoonish frog sail carefully close to another that resembled a Hassan mask.
From her spot at the boardwalk railing close to the Tropicana forest, she often glanced to the distant children playing by the shores. Her smile was radiant, and though it was hard to tear her eyes from all the activity, she had a job to do; Even the little monkeys that sometimes came by only borrowed her attention for fleeting moments. Several servants and employees were setting up quaint stands and events by the Marina and Club Cove, but they were far from finished. Though she would help later, she was still currently helping in her own way.
"I'm winning this time, Father!" "I'm not defeated that easily!"
Her calm guard was stolen away yet again to the crystal waters. Some relaxing employees and servants by the lapping waves stared over the larger surf. A growing wall of water was reaching its apex as two distant figures rode matching gold and blue surfboards. Raikou couldn't help but smile as Mordred and Arturia glared towards each other competitively, yet their smiles held no ill will. The berserker beamed at another parent and child moment.
On the other hand, the crowd seemed mixed.
"Uh, isn't that wave bigger than it should be?" "Will it hit us!?" "Guess we should wave goodbye then." "Oh god pun guy's at it agai-" "RUN! HOLY SHIT RUN!"
Raikou subconsciously leaned against the railing as the wave began to break against the shore. It surged forth across the wet sands and chased the laughing crowds. Two monkeys scampered between the forest of legs to bolt for safety. Some employees were caught by its grasp and tumbled about. Others escaped the ocean's wrath as it reached further up the beach than even she expected.
Her eyes scanned quickly for anyone hurt, but she relaxed upon seeing any mirth-filled 'victims' getting up just fine. Amid the newly wet sand, the only casualty was Mordred. Sitting on her surfboard among retreating waters, she covered her bare chest with both hands as she scanned around for her red bikini top. She stared forward as Arturia stood before her, holding the top with a mildly exasperated expression. Her other hand rested firmly on her side as she stood proudly in her own blue and white bikini.
The king shook her head, but chuckled. "You need to tie this on better. The prince can't go exposing herself so readily."
"…But I still won!" Mordred's smile was as bright as her embarrassed blush, which only made Arturia chuckle and nod in acceptance.
As Mordred fussed while Arturia helped fix her swimsuit, Raikou pondered their situation for the thousandth time. By all accounts, the bond between them should have been impossible to restore. A knight who rebelled and toppled a kingdom would have been forever shunned and vilified in the berserker's prideful era, doomed with eternal dishonor. She heard that's how it was like before, but one singularity changed that. Apparently perspectives made a big difference.
Yet, as much as others requested Raikou keep an open mind about her own beliefs, she was having none of it. What did they know? Especially those of another era or region? Her grudges weren't merely a grudge that could be forgiven. It was a proven fact they simply didn't understand. She couldn't see? It was more like they couldn't see what was so obvious.
And so her eyes turned back to inspect her true quarry, who were currently laughing at a fussing Arturia over her restless child. On a fire-patterned beach blanket barely two hundred meters away, the two Onis were enjoying a large bowl of Shuten's special fruit. Just looking their way, she could feel and smell the alcohol that permeated from every grape or apple. Their laughter was like a chorus of hell-spawned demons cackling at newfound slaves.
It was perplexing and infuriating that no one else save for a select few saw what Raikou did. Ibaraki was certainly scheming something as she lounged blissfully in her strapless white one piece. After eating a grape, Shuten glanced over to her companion blankly as she pushed herself up onto her elbows. Her pure white skin glistened like a seductress, for her skimpy black bikini barely covered her. She reached over daintily with one hand to readjust the big red tropical flower in Ibaraki's hair, making her flush with excitement and cheer.
The distant sound of her laugh only made Raikou's eyes narrow instinctively.
She and her dear Kintoki have heard that sound all too well. The souls of their many victims as well. It was the clamor of a reaper's footsteps. Their smiles were the shimmer of a well-honed scythe but a moment before it drank deeply of their blood. All for what? Pleasure and impulse. Whims and desires.
A mere fleeting thought of it made her clench her fists instinctively, and even wish to grasp her dematerialized katana.
The other masters and her dear Anishka were naïve. Most Chaldeans seemed to be fooled by them too… even her dear Kintoki now too. To go so far from his own beliefs to fall in love with Shuten…! It was impossible to believe had it not come from his own mouth. But it had, and she was suddenly alone against the Onis.
Raikou couldn't understand why. Why was she the only one who still had her utmost guard about them? Some said she was growing closer, but it was only in her attempt to secure a better position to strike. If she was close enough, she may find a new weakness to exploit. She could still save her beloved Kintoki. She could save Chaldea, that was so blind as to allow these insufferable beings to-
"If thou has words to grace us with, come hither already. Thou knows we don't bite… hard…" She stiffened. The sound of Shuten's laughter echoed in her mind after her words.
Further away, the Oni stared at her with a taunting smirk while Ibaraki stared tensely. For a moment, her light glare was unshaken as they gazed back. In a flash of unforgiving lightning, she could close the distance and strike. She could wipe the smirk off her face when she least expected it… but it wasn't so easy anymore. Not as simple as she'd wished, at least.
Instead of charging with the fury of Ragnarök, she began her calm but powerful stroll towards them.
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Her approach had been long and quiet. The further Raikou approached, the more the glances grew in number. Unsurprisingly, Skyler didn't seem to care as she descended the boardwalk stairs beside him. He only continued to stare off aimlessly, as he usually did, to the distant clouds while Artesia stayed knelt nearby to scold her fluffy dog.
"I told you, Cavall II. Don't go anywhere near those woods. Are you even listening to me?" The dog only barked back happily, licked her face, and nuzzled her uniform, making her sulk.
They were soon among the only ones not eyeing her with concern. Okita was quietly peeping at them from around her stand as she helped Hijikata paint its sign that read 'Goldfish Scooping.' But her leader, like everyone else, should have nothing to worry about. As a Peacekeeper, she wasn't going to give poor, cute little Okita more hassles than she already had.
That didn't mean she wasn't going to look for any excuse to behead the Onis on the spot.
As her wooden sandals clapped lightly against the sand, the cheers of the closer children faded away. Sounds of happy festival construction and the caws of nearby seagulls vanished in her focused mind. With eyes still locked on Shuten, who had been staring all the while in challenge, Raikou finally came before their blanket. Ibaraki hardly looked pleased as she gazed at Shuten, but the darker-haired Oni only smiled and picked up the bowl of fruits.
"Grace thy tongue with ecstacy?"
Raikou's stare was firm but blank. "How do I know they're not poisoned?"
"My, my… After all that courteousness on our trip…?" Shuten mused openly as she plucked a succulent grape for herself, but held her own firm stare. "So sad… Have I been deceived? I thought we made gorgeous strides together. Ibaraki loves that kimono we picked for her."
"Shuten…" Ibaraki groaned lightly, but the other Oni only tossed her a teasing smile.
"I told you before. It's only by necessity. I'm not dragging innocents into my dispute with you insects," Raikou answered firmly as she crossed her arms. Ibaraki's eyes narrowed, but Shuten kept a taunting smile. "Chaldea is to maintain secrecy, and I wish for nothing more but peace. Do not think of those days as anything more than an unfortunate compromise, Shuten."
"How unfortunate… The boy won't be happy if you tell him that," she prodded back as her smile faded. That jab stung her more than she allowed herself to reveal. It was true. Kintoki and Tomoe were trying to find some civil ground between her and the Onis, but she refused to yield any more ground.
"I still don't trust you. You're both up to something," she practically spat back. "I don't know what you're waiting for, but you're being too civil for Onis. It's suspicious, and you have everyone fooled but me."
"The only fooled soul is you, Minamoto no Yorimitsu," Shuten replied back with an amused smile. "Thou knows the reason we stay our hand."
"No. I don't," she countered as Ibaraki blinked incredulously.
"Why are you always so stupid!? We've told you a few times already!" The ringleader Oni's response rained her annoyance, but it pattered off Raikou's stern gaze. "Sometimes I wish something could actually get through your thick skull."
That thinly veiled threat wasn't lost on her. She glared, and Ibaraki glared back. This was how it always was. A spar of words where both parties provoked the other to attack. If there was any mutual feelings shared between them, it was the animosity, annoyance, and overwhelming desire to see the other's blood fertilizing the land. It was almost impossible to stay her own hand from such a brash inference… but letting her hand run free wasn't so easy anymore.
Should she do so without proper cause, Chaldea would act against her. She would lose what she'd found here, and that was unacceptable. There was also no hope of fighting back their collective strength, and much of her wouldn't dare ruin the beauty she'd seen here. Thus, her hands were bound and forced.
Yet, a voice in her mind urged action like an alarm. Her mind threw images of their screaming, horrific deaths. She could see herself grinning with pure satisfaction over her triumph, and even laughing. The laughter grew in her mind, but it was like a cancer. Its roots dug into all the wrong places and brought discomfort where grateful bliss should have sewn itself. As much as she desired her act, it was the image of herself that followed which unnerved and shamed her.
But the mixed dance of bliss and denial was shattered as Shuten stared to her dear sibling. "Ibaraki… Did I not ask of you?"
"…You did..." She stared back at her incredulously, but sighed with discontent. "I'm not doing anything aggressive! I can play with words too!"
"It's only expected an Oni would have to let their true nature out somehow," Raikou spat, and re-earned Ibaraki's glare.
However, her rock-steady composure was nearly cracked by the pickaxe which was Shuten's stare. It was different. It wasn't the taunting gaze that threatened to break her vow of civility to the masters, Peacekeepers, and her children. It was an almost blank stare with subtle curiosity. It annoyed her, but it was unnerving. She could take the sneers, taunts, and stares of demons, but this look of pondering and possible understanding made her mentally quiver.
She wasn't sure how long she stared, but thankfully, the berserker's composure thankfully didn't falter. Ibaraki glanced at Shuten as she merely hummed, then finally smiled amusingly. "I suppose not… It is our nature, but we make surprising strides, do we not?"
"I won't believe in your tricks, but so long as you're civil, I have no reason to let my blade drink deeply," Raikou declared outright, then finally began walking away. "I'll be watching."
"I hope you enjoy what graces thy sight~…" Shuten teased back with a sultry voice, making Ibaraki laugh.
'Of course I won't…' If she were honest, she'd admit she was surprised she had managed to hold a few conversations with them in Japan. But that was over; They were a few squares back once more. Yet, the duo seemed a bit happier, where she remained just as wary. They were truly scheming something. They had to be.
They were Onis. At their core, they were completely incompatible with humans. They were strong phantasmals who sought their desires relentlessly and changed their values and interests on a whim. Morals and ethics meant little to nothing to them, who saw humans as fleeting playthings for them to use. They were completely unrelatable and could not be understood…
…Yet, as much as she desired others to acknowledge this truth, so many long nights of thinking tore little holes in her ship's hull. Tonight would likely be another.
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The day had swam by uneventfully. She'd helped with some festival stands, played with the adorable children, and even fussed over Kintoki who'd gotten a bit scuffed; Once more, he didn't appreciate her tears and pampering as much as she'd hoped. However, even with the delicious aromas of a Spanish dinner, two birthdays, her son's fun little sumo match on the beach with Benkei, and the rest of the evening to herself... it felt anything but relaxing.
Shuten's curious stare haunted her more than anything before.
One of her greatest enemies might suspect something, whereas she never had before. Maybe she did and she never noticed? The thought worried her. The consequences terrified her. It took all she could to keep her elegant and motherly demeanor flawless throughout the whole night.
But now that she was back in her room, it hit like a meteor. Her heart pounded like war drums for a battle she couldn't win. She felt like she was suffocating with every breath. The mounting dread was drowning her, and she could do nothing but collapse onto her tatami mats in a heap. With a hand over her chest, she tried to calm herself and looked around the room for support.
There was countless waiting for her with bright smiles. Among the comforting Japanese aesthetics, she had several mahogany bookshelves. Each one held little mementos, gifts, and souvenirs of her fights alongside Chaldea. Most important and numerous of all were the countless picture frames and albums that covered them. She wasn't Mashu, but she loved the idea of freezing a memory for eternity.
George sometimes teased her that she was Chaldea's mother snapping photos of herself and friends everywhere. She couldn't help it. She loved being around so many warm and inviting people. Every moment spent with them was a treasure that deserved a spot on her shelves or walls. So many did, and now acted as the safety net to keep her aloft amid her despair.
But to her despair, it was only making things worse today. Her voice was a strained whisper, "I can't lose you…"
Her eyes gazed to a photo of her, Kintoki, and Anishka. She had the other two in a tight hug as they posed before a defeated chimera… her first every deployment. Their smiles were strained and exasperated. Hers shined like newly minted gold.
She turned to another on the wall. It was just her and Boudica with matching aprons, cooking together in the kitchen. With her dutiful watch over the Onis, she couldn't spend as much time with her closest friends like her. She wished for more, just like she wished for more pictures from her first days. Her phone made it easier now, but there were so many precious first moments she wanted recorded.
With every picture she glanced to, her heart filled with warmth and concern. They struggled for control, and threatened to rip her in two. The first tears were already starting to mar her vision, but she wasn't sure what they were for anymore: Joy or despair. She only glanced around the room from photo to photo…
…until, in her haste, she accidentally stared at the full-length mirror by her platform bed. Her reflection was avoided as best as possible, but sometimes she'd freeze on contact with her own eyes. The only reason she hadn't glanced while dressing that damn Oni was because she was so overwhelmed keeping her violent impulses in check. It sometimes happened once a night to send her into a long spiral of brooding thought. But today was going to be far worse as the image of Shuten's stare flashed in her mind.
Raikou sniffled, and the first tears rolled slowly down her cheeks. She couldn't stop them tonight. Not with all the smiling faces looking out from her many photos. She wanted to tear all of them off her furniture and hug them close. She wanted to hear the sweet whispers of her children, hugging her gently and saying everything is going to be fine. That it's just a bad dream. That she was mistaken.
Yet much of her feared it was just the beginning of a nightmare, born thanks to her lifelong curse.
"Please… Kintoki… Annie… Your mother needs you…" Raikou whispered desperately. She was so lost in her growing torment, she didn't realize she never sent it telepathically. "Please… I need you.."
A mother was supposed to be there for her children. She was supposed to be strong and supportive, to fuss over them over every little thing. Yet she also wanted to be coddled and loved. To be appreciated and cared for in her times of need. As she stared at herself, she hoped for them to burst through her door and hold her. To tell her all would be okay.
'But an Oni never deserves that affection.'
That was it. The terrible truth that sent her spiraling into a curled ball on the floor. If she were in a better mood, she would've handled her shame just fine. But the sin was heavy today. And the thought someone else knew the truth overwhelmed her anxieties. Her panic attack became a noose around her neck… one which a voice within wanted to tighten.
She knew the dreaded nature of Onis, because she was half Oni; Even a fraction was an unfathomable sin. Her human reason raged against her own demonic sneers. In battle, she thought she had control, but often times she looked back and realized her own fault. Her mixed blood made her see differently. It was only in quiet retrospect did her shame and sin echo in her mind. She hated Onis, but she herself was one, and that was unforgivable.
But her children loved her regardless; She knew that! Kintoki understood who she was, but as a mixed blood himself, her precious boy still cared for her. He wanted her to be happy, even here in Chaldea! Someone as tainted and sinned as her found brief respites with him, and now Anishka. Just for fleeting moments, she was allowed to feel like a normal human and a beloved mother.
'Onis don't deserve that. They only ruin it all in the end on fleeting whims.'
Her own beliefs clashed with her hopes and ideals forever. Day after day, it was the same battle on bloodied fields. Every look into a mirror was a slung arrow returned by dozens until the sky was filled with her never-ending plight. Today, the arrows pierced her deeper than ever, and she wept in her ball on the ground. It was a pathetic sight she wanted none to see, but it was fueled by the greater terror Chaldea may know the truth.
Without any doubt, she couldn't trust Shuten. They were fated adversaries in life. Even if they were supposed to fight together, that didn't mean Raikou would like it. She merely compromised until now, but it seemed it was time for a preemptive strike. She just needed a real excuse.
She wept, but her resolve grew fiery with rage. Her Oni-blood unknowingly seduced her thoughts, and in her desperate state, she gave in to its furious whispers. By all means, she had to protect what she held. No, she couldn't lose her place as a beloved mother in Chaldea. All these beautiful memories she held, and the many more to come, must be preserved! No one else will find out so long as that insect was exterminated.
And so it was decided… Shuten will take Raikou's secret to the grave.
¨·..·¨·..·¨·..·¨(¯ˆ·.¸ VII ¸.·ˆ¯)¨·..·¨·..·¨·..·¨
It had taken her an hour to recollect herself from her crying fit, but the urge to act was overwhelming. That didn't mean she was going to let her invited guest see her in such a shoddy mood. After teary eyes were replaced with adamant resolve, she'd called for family of a different kind. It had been quiet urgings, but it wasn't too late yet; Thankfully, the archer tended to stay up later anyway.
With hands on her lap, Raikou stared firmly at Tomoe, who knelt too. The archer's posture was perfect, even if Raikou always reassured her she could be relaxed before an ancestor; Her sense of respect was always so cute. Her pajamas were even cuter, if unknown to her. Coupled with her white yoga pants, she had an oversized white t-shirt with a strange logo that said Monster Hunter. Knowing the archer, the little teal fanny pack had one of her beloved game consoles within.
However, talking about her modern hobby was far from both of their minds. Tomoe blinked in confusion. "…You think Shuten is going to spread a bad rumor about you?"
"She's one of my most hated enemies. Of course she will. It was only a matter of time," Raikou insisted without hesitation. "The consequences of serious fighting are grave. She knows that, so she's going to defame me as provocation. She's resolved to turn Chaldea against me so I will be banished! I know it!"
"Slander?" Tomoe's stare grew with skepticism and uncertainty, but she remained respectful. "Raikou-sama… What kind of rumor do you think she's spreading?"
She hesitated. She hadn't thought about this too much, but she couldn't just tell Tomoe what it was about. But part of her did want to since they shared conditions. Still, she covered herself. "I'm not sure, but that's why I want you to help me watch over her! It's bound to be a terrible lie that would tarnish my image! She's getting close to many so they'll believe her word over mine! Onis can't be trusted!"
Tomoe flinched lightly in shame at that last comment, which made Raikou's stern gaze falter to apologetic concern. She quickly backpedaled as she reached her hands forward in pleading. "Oh no! You're not the same as them! You're only half-Oni, Tomoe! You're not one! You're not!"
Her words sounded just like the lies she told to herself night after night… But there was truth to it. That's why she said it to Tomoe, who'd been brave enough to admit she had mixed blood. She truly was different, but occasional glimpses of that fiery rage in battle proved her nature. She was part Oni, yet at the same time, she was still this gentle and calm woman around Chaldea. She could still smile so genuinely and enjoy herself without worry of judgement.
Just like Shuten… Just like Ibaraki
It made Raikou unbelievably jealous and envious. It also made her think over much over the past few months. If not the descendant before her, then the Onis admittedly made her think hard. If they fit in so seemingly peacefully in Chaldea without hiding themselves, couldn't she? But she knew that answer already. Even if part of her believed it might be possible, the rest was adamant after her lifelong achievements. There was no mistaking the firm fact in her head.
"Oni blood is Oni blood…" Tomoe replied back with a sad smile. It matched what her mind always said.
"But you're different! You see, don't you? There's nothing to be ashamed of… You're accepted for who you are in Chaldea! I always told you this!" The sad reality was that Raikou couldn't see the hypocrisy in her own words. She was reassuring Tomoe she was accepted, yet she would not accept herself as different from the real Onis; She couldn't even accept something was clearly different with them too. "You're not some bloodthirsty Oni who would betray their human allies on a whim! You're not Shuten or Ibaraki! You're the beautiful Tomoe Gozen of the Minamotos!"
Tomoe sighed, but smiled. "Thank you… But you really should give Shuten and Ibaraki more of a chance too. They're not so different as we were raised to believe."
'Oh heavens, not Tomoe too…' Raikou's expression hardened again as she shook her head. She had to stamp out this heretical thought. "Pure Onis are nothing less than demons! They're incompatible with humans! They're too different!"
"They're more relatable than you think," the archer insisted calmly. "They feel emotions too. How many times have you seen Ibaraki get angry, or laugh, or get jealous when Shuten isn't paying attention to her? Shuten's often so happy, but she also has sad and thoughtful moments too. They're strong and often morally questionable, but being an Oni isn't an absence of emotion, Raikou-sama… it's emotional extremes that often disregards reason."
She refused to believe that. Onis were as straightforward as they could get. They were demons who chased pleasures that often came at the cost of human innocence. They fed on people and toyed with humanity for mere enjoyment. They were nothing alike. Their emotions and cordial nature was just a well-made ruse or illusion to lead them all into a false sense of security. She'd seen it too many times from Shuten and Ibaraki to buy Tomoe's words.
…And once more, the truth that her Oni blood led to extremes of emotion sadly never registered in her mind.
"I can see it because I share their blood… It was difficult coping with the impulses. Maybe if you shared it too, I guess you'd see, but it's so terribly difficult to convince you." If only Raikou could tell her the truth, but she was terrified of the consequences. Tomoe sighed, then bowed apologetically. "…Forgive me. I didn't mean any disrespect talking back to you. I just don't believe Shuten would go behind your back like that… Not when she has so much to lose if it escalates."
That point Raikou could actually see, if only because it had been from experience and her own continuous musings in past weeks. Shuten is known for loving absolute pleasure. To lose a fraction of it would anger her, and as much as she wished to deny it, there was no mistaking the look on her face around Kintoki. It was teasing, amused, and often mysterious, but it was the same look she always wore when indulging in her favorite pleasures.
Her little Kintoki made Shuten very happy. Of that, there was no doubt, but she still didn't like they were together.
Regardless, her mood was shifting with her own thoughts since Tomoe was clearly not willing to help with Raikou's most recent desire… a desire that was quickly fading away with her own growing reasoning. The endless civil war in her heart raged on, but logic gained enough ground to matter. "No, that wouldn't be like that insect, would it… She always does like enjoying my pain personally."
"She does… She told me herself she's come to love teasing you," the archer admitted, which only made Raikou's mood sour again.
The bloodlust and killing intent was fading, but her fear remained palpable. Shuten may still know something, but if she did, she at least wasn't spreading it for one reason or another. So, she remained resolved to do something in case it was the true, but it was already her routine. There was always too much on the line for her to lose. Plus, she wasn't going to let some Onis manipulate her.
Raikou sighed. "…I'll still be keeping my eye on her just in case."
"I'm sorry if I didn't give you what you wanted, but I don't think you should be worried about some silly rumor." Her smile was cheerful but apologetic. "They did answer the summoning to help humanity. They can't be that bad, right?"
"…They did, but I know they must have ulterior motives. Just look at Mephistopheles. I still don't trust him. He's up to something too!" Raikou insisted, but then finally smiled apologetically. "Oh… don't mind your ancestor. She's just being rude at this point… Sorry for disturbing your rest, Tomoe."
Tomoe giggled and waved it off. "It's fine, Raikou-sama. I was just playing some games in my room. If there's nothing else, may I take my leave? My game is still paused."
The berserker smiled, but then had a quick thought. "I troubled you about helping me… but how about you? Do you need help with anything, Tomoe? Rearranging furniture? Little gifts? Dealing with…"
She'd stopped herself before she touched a sore subject, but her motherly side compelled her to act; Especially when it came to family. She had two lovely and cute descendants to warm her heart, but none would dare call them family. Raikou stared with sad concern as Tomoe's smile faltered to a blank and tense expression. She wanted to hug the poor dear as she breathed out slowly with a troubled glint in her eyes.
"…No. I still don't want to talk to her. She was leading the army. She was the one who likely did it. I don't doubt it…" Before the archer could even sigh, Raikou quickly scooched over and wrapped her in a hug. The soft and caring embrace struck a chord, and Tomoe's gentle but shaking arms wrapped around Raikou. She could feel the war of anger and sadness beneath her stiff, yet calm hold.
"You're more than welcome to talk about it with me. We're family." They were. She saw both Ushiwakamaru and Tomoe as family, but not as close as her dear children. That didn't mean she didn't love them in her own way, nor wish every day that they could mend the terrible rift from those turbulent years. If Camelot could do it, couldn't they?
"…I don't want to talk about it… but thank you, Raikou-sama."
"If you do feel like it, I'll lend my ear. That's what family is for." She kept her embrace warm and reassuring. 'One day, I hope…'
"Family…" Tomoe mumbled quietly into Raikou's shoulder. Though her eyes remained stormy, there was no rain of tears. Raikou was glad for that much.
Their history was entangled and long, and it was apparent not even Ushiwakamaru's attempt to help Tomoe in the Time Temple seemed to make a noticeable dent… Nor did the archer's confrontation of a shadow Ushiwakamaru near Tumangang. Maybe it was like how she felt with Shuten and Ibaraki; Maybe it was overwhelming hatred influenced by her mixed blood. She didn't know, just like she was uncertain about what to do.
She couldn't do much more than offer emotional support, no matter how much she wanted to. Her motherly optimism could only cling to hope since a forceful hand from her would only make things worse: This was solely between the two Minamoto champions.
It sometimes made her wonder how many others fought their own hidden wars.
·..·¨·..·¨·..·¨(¯ˆ·.¸ VIII ¸.·ˆ¯)¨·..·¨·..·¨·..·¨
As much as she trusted Tomoe, the truth never escaped her: Onis couldn't be trusted. But she also knew there were other means of obtaining facts. She didn't want opinions or guesses; Those will never persuade her. Raikou needed the absolute truth that she could acknowledge, and there were two servants that could do it for her.
Since it would have been rude to wake up sleeping servants, she'd pondered her options and plans all night. Now that the morning sun was warming the resort for breakfast, she finally took her next step. In her simple lavender A-line dress that barely kept her chess contained, she sought out either of them. It just so happened she ran into Karna first, rather than Holmes.
But she wasted no time in politely requesting his assistance without grabbing attention. She hopefully didn't look too obvious just standing by the railing waiting for his return, but she needed more clues to act. As a Peacekeeper, she had rules to follow, and the ever strict and straightforward fellow Peacekeeper would not lead her wrong. So, with a pleasant smile, she glanced to Karna as he returned. "Oh? Back already?"
He stopped before her while the amber morning light made his silver and red, three-piece kurta glimmer magnificently. Her eyes glistened like his clothes in anticipation for the sought-after words. "Shuten and Ibaraki aren't planning anything devious against you."
Those were definitely not the words she expected, or wanted, to hear. Her smile faltered. "…But they're Onis! They have to be hiding something! Are you weren't being deceived by what you saw?"
"I would be able to tell if they did, and I asked them twice." Now Raikou's mouth definitely fell open. Perhaps Karna was too straightforward at times. She thought he'd be subtler about it, but clearly she was very wrong. "I thought it best to be direct since you appeared very fearful of the results. Are you not happy with what I told you?"
"…No, I'm very pleased to hear it." She was comforted, certainly, but she was still confused. Part of her still denied Karna was telling the truth… but he was always perceptive and precise. That's why she asked him. "… Oh, never mind… I just have more thinking to do. Sorry for troubling you."
He nodded, turned to head back to his table where Edison and Helena sat, but smiled lightly to her in reassurance. "I understand you're concerned with what you know about Onis, but I feel you're overthinking things. You shouldn't have anything to fear, Raikou."
As he finally walked away, she had a small feeling that what he said was meant for more than just Oni scheming. She couldn't place it though. Especially not when Shuten's amused giggles suddenly rang through her mind, "Sending Karna to tear the truth from our hearts? Thy mistrust runs deep."
Raikou turned a small glare towards the Oni's distant table, and caught her taunting smirk through the growing, shifting crowds. The amusement in her eyes and voice was enough, but Ibaraki's laughter just made it worse. Even so, she felt far lighter, and her fears dissipated in the morning breeze thanks to Karna's words. She wasn't planning anything… yet… but she'd be watching.
Mostly satisfied her day could go on without crippling fear, she chose not to entertain Shuten with a reply.
·..·¨·..·¨·..·¨(¯ˆ·.¸ IX ¸.·ˆ¯)¨·..·¨·..·¨·..·¨
It was unnerving, even for her, how fast she'd moved past her earlier compulsions. It was just how she was; She'd rather not think about that nightmare just under her feet, ready to swallow her whole. So with the threat gone, she'd gone on with her day as the concerns dripped away with every lovely moment she chased.
In the Salon's Ballroom just after lunch, she'd come across the loveliest so far. "Peekaboo! Oh no, where'd Buttercup go…? Peekaboooo~!"
At a cluster of ottomans close to the vacant Grand Piano, Raikou gently held the white teddy bear's arms over its eyes. Beside her, Giovanni stared in confusion where he sat; He looked so, so adorable in his little green t-rex jumpsuit. His gaze lit up like fireworks as Raikou moved the bear's arms into a cheering post. She wiggled the bear with a bright smile. "Here he is~!"
Giovanni happily clapped as his mother giggled beside her. Her knitting project lay abandoned on her uniform's lap as she kept a gentle hand always close to her child. Boudica's scattered knitting items rested on another Ottoman, and Vlad's at another. The lancer was watching another of his niece's recordings while the rider was checking up on her baking sweets in the kitchen. Naomi and Medea were gone when she got here, as usual for the working partners.
That gave the berserker an almost total monopoly on time with the cute child! "Peekaboo~! …Hm. You don't seem to be as happy when I do it this week? Are you getting bored of Auntie Raikou? That'll make me sad you know, you little cutey~!"
Elsa giggled as she pulled Gio's baby carriage closer. "It's not you, Raikou. He's finally getting his object permanence. I was getting scared it's so late..."
"Oh, you're always scared over Gio," Raikou teased, but then quickly reassured upon seeing Elsa's embarrassed smile. "You're a mother! You're supposed to be! You know how terrified I am when Kintoki deploys alone without me or his friends."
Elsa nodded and smiled. Raikou quickly went back to making the teddy bear dance gently. It was such a soft and fragile toy she was scared to handle it weeks ago. In time, she'd grown confident with her own finesse, and handled the toy carefully. She just made sure not to press the little button inside its back, which was the only curious hardpoint Elsa warned about; It was well disguised beneath the warm stuffing.
She leaned towards the pair's Ottoman and slowly made the bear walk towards the clapping child. She smiled to Elsa. "Do you have as much free time tomorrow?"
"Not this much," she replied as she began knitting a little blanket again. "Two of my clients are taking incredible steps, but it's as expected for the rest."
"Any poor dears terribly traumatized?" Raikou wondered with a small dip in her smile. She never did ask Elsa too much about her job as the Chaldean Wellness Specialist, but she had far more free time recently. It meant more moments spent in the Salon or resort playing with little Giovanni. The berserker's smile recovered when she made the bear hug the baby boy. "Gotchuuuu~!"
Elsa smiled at her child, but it held a tinge of sadness. "A few. I can't talk about it, but I worry for them. They hide it so well while it eats away at them… Progress is slow."
"Oh dear…" Raikou mumbled in sympathy, but her heart remained afloat just watching Giovanni happily hugging his bear. If children made her happy, then being around an innocent baby was one of the fewer greater joys for a mother. His presence just sucked the doom, gloom, and despair from the air like a vacuum to replace it with its childish glee and coos. Giovanni gazed into the berserker's eyes with his wondering little pupils, and she couldn't help but smile. "Your mommy is such a hard and caring woman~! You couldn't have gotten better~!"
Giovanni giggled at the response, followed by Elsa and Raikou's laughter. The employee offered a thankful glance her way as Boudica finally strolled back with a small tray of colorful cupcakes; Raikou could see a few sprinkles clinging to her jeans. The rider paused momentarily, placed a hand akimbo atop her white turtleneck sweater, and stared at a nearby side-table with their drinks. Before she could even reach to make room, Raikou stood, walked over, and began rearranging them for her fellow mother.
Boudica giggled. "Thanks. I should have asked Gilles for a separate tray."
"I could get us one. I want another cocktail," Raikou offered as she picked up two empty glasses. "You can keep Gio and Elsa company in my place!"
"Oh, what a terrible chore you've thrown onto to me," the rider feigned disappointment as she smiled, but the women giggled. Giovanni clapped, even if he didn't understand the mirth. "I think we'll be fine without the tray. Don't take too long! I found a bunch of movies I think you'll like."
"I'll be extra quick now!" The berserker's feet quickly carried her towards the bar. She made a curious note Kiyohime had arrived unnoticed at some point to sit at one of the stools. With her shoulders slumped and face glued onto her phone, Raikou could quickly guess what her mood was and why without seeing her expression. It was a sad shame; A smile would be a better match for her plain daisy-colored kimono.
Gilles and D'Eon manned the bar since most of the French were accompanying Marie on the deployment today. They continued to clean glasses, but turned to the door rather than notice her approach. She glanced over too and saw the ever-battle clad Chacha stroll in, all high and mighty, look around, then seem to make a beeline towards their cluster of ottomans. Raikou hummed to herself, 'I guess she's looking for Naomi? But they're always at work after lunch…'
"Can I trouble you for one more?" she asked as she leaned against the bar to place her two drinks down. D'Eon was swifter on the draw since Gilles was balancing several beer mugs at once; He also occasionally stared towards the doorway, but said nothing.
The French knight courteously bowed and took the empty glasses. He offered an affirmation, but it fell muted as Raikou quietly, but subtly, eyed Kiyohime. Her mood was definitely far worse than she'd predicted as she glared at her phone. Her breaths were like a fuming dragon as her fingers tried not to break her pho-
"What does weeb even mean!? Ugghh! Another pig!" she huffed, and made Gilles flinch. She slammed her phone down onto her purse on an adjacent stool and buried her face into her hands. Raikou's motherly instincts worried for tears, but the other berserker only let out a long sigh of frustration. She mumbled into her hands. "Why am I even still trying…"
"Because you won't find it if you don't keep looking," Raikou offered gently, but earned a tired and irritated stare from Kiyohime. She didn't take offense.
"All I ever find are guys who want to use me like a tool or think I'm a faker," she rolled her eyes gently. She then planted her face in her hands again and mumbled inaudibly; Her servant hearing caught it. "Why couldn't Chaldea be in Paris, or Rome, or somewhere other than mythical mount nowhere Antarctica…"
As Raikou thought of how to comfort her attempts at dating, Gilles cleared his throat gently. Kiyohime unfolded her hands, stared at him, and noticed, like Raikou, that he only gazed past them. They turned around, and Raikou blinked in surprise upon sight of a lone Vigil uniform. Omar walked awkwardly slow while waving his arms cautiously in front of him in the large aisle. Her motherly concern noticed his razor burns were a bit more inflamed today; She wanted to nurse them before Nightingale did.
He faced roughly towards them, but his tone sounded a bit guilty. "Um… Sorry to hear that… I hope you don't think I'm one of the guys using you like a tool…? I mean, I understand if you do since…"
Kiyohime's expression quickly flashed from surprised to ashamed as she quickly hopped off her stool and scooted towards him. "No, that wasn't aimed at you! You're not using me, Omar! Sorry, I'm just really fed up with trying new sites. Tinder has been the worst so far…"
"Oh… I didn't know Tinder worked in Antarctica," he commented as Kiyohime quickly looked around. "Is, um… Mozart or Eric here?"
"Not today. They deployed with Marie to gather some exotic Christmas ornaments in Japan," D'Eon offered as he brought back Raikou's refilled drink. She gently took it with a smile and quiet thank you as the saber asked the question that was on her mind, and likely Kiyohime's too. "Where are the partners?"
"They brought me here and left for the Angel. There's an emergency operation in Chile." He left it at that for obvious reasons, but then glanced around uncertainly again. "They were hoping Mozart or Eric were here… I guess I can't ask for another lesson…"
He looked so small, and she almost wanted to coddle him and say everything will be alright. But how much longer would he wait for that? Da Vinci was still having issues finalizing his eye replacements, and there were bigger difficulties pointed out by the true puppet expert. That's about the extent of the rumors she heard from Marie though. Nearly everyone could still only wonder what terrible skin scarring lay behind his oversized, blackened sunglasses.
But at least others were helping him cope for now, even if he always felt helpless and a burden. After a small pause, he glanced around and asked quietly. "Kiyohime…? Uh… Are you still there?"
"Yes, I'm here," she reassured, then lightly placed her fingers against his arm as reassurance. He quickly relaxed on contact. "Do you need help with anything?"
"I won't be bothering you will I…?" The uncertainty was painful to her. He was only fourteen, so she saw him as a child still. He should be studying, fretting over pimples, trying to hide his razor burns, and dealing with fleeting drama… not learning to cope with sudden total blindness! She wanted to do something, but it was apparent Kiyohime could do more for him than she could. After the other berserker whispered a no, Omar nodded quietly. "Then, could you lead me to the piano…? If you don't mind? I'd like to try playing again."
"Sure," she reassured gently as he quietly reached out with his hands and took a step forward. She gently took one in her own and coaxed him towards the piano. He cautiously followed as she led him carefully and gently. Raikou moved silently and quietly past them so she wouldn't spook the poor dear, but offered one final sad frown their way. Kiyohime caught it, and returned a tiny and sympathetic smile.
With a solemn sigh, she walked over to their cluster of ottomans. She blinked when she saw Chacha playing with Giovanni by making funny faces at him. Boudica and Elsa were watching with quiet coos. Though confused, her heart was refilling with delight. Raikou blinked again as she placed her drink down on a side table. "Chacha? You came to play with Giovanni?"
"No. Chacha was looking for Naomi and Medea to ask about her tribute dress, but they weren't here," she answered primly, but then smiled proudly at the happily clapping Giovanni. "But Gio reminded Chacha of her children, so Chacha wanted to play with Gio too! Gio should feel privileged!"
The older women shared an amused glance with Boudica. She may be prim, proper, and often haughty, but there was quite the charm when it came from a child. Since Chacha was sitting on Raikou ottoman, she was content to stand and watch. Chacha's own motherly instincts seemed to shine through her perfect ease of playing with the baby. She smiled as Chacha picked up the bear by its torso and wiggled it. "Behold! By Chacha's touch, your bear has been granted life! I am your teddy! Ruler of your happiness, Giovanni! Bow before me and… Huh? Is there something inside this bear?"
"Oh! Please don't-!" Before Elsa could request urgently, Chacha had seemingly pressed it. She stared at the barely curiously, but Raikou glanced to Elsa in confusion. She'd requested it so sincerely to all of them before, but she never thought much about it until she saw the sudden concern in her eyes. Her answer came quickly: Recorded Italian from a man's raspy voice resounded from the furry toy.
"(Hi Gio! My little man! Your father wanted to make this a surprise for your first birthday, but I might not be home. It pains me. I don't want my job to keep me from my family… You and your beautiful mother.)" Raikou's heart was warmed by the sweet words.
Yet, dread grew upon hearing Elsa's first sniffle. "(You're my worlds, but I have to work so I can give you two the world! I always pine for the day I can come home to see you and hug you! You make so much noise at night, but my best sleep is at home with you two!)
By now, Elsa was having trouble controlling herself, and Boudica had covered her own mouth with her hand. Chacha stared between them all with growing concern, but the recording wasn't through yet. (I hope Buttercup will keep you and your mother safe until I return! He's a good little sailor, just like your father! I love you, son. Keep your mother happy until I return!)"
Chacha was frozen in place as Elsa tried desperately to control her tears. Raikou found words beyond her surprise and growing sympathy. "Elsa… Please tell me he'll…"
Boudica was immediately on damage control, even as her own eyes flooded with related sympathy. The message of her tears and heartbroken whimpers that escaped her lips was clear. She practically shrank into Boudica's embrace as Giovanni glanced around with worry. D'Eon had rushed over in concern, and Omar's first staggered notes on the piano crashed to a halt as Elsa's whispered painfully. "It… It w-was his… last gift before… he..."
There was no way to mistake a grieving widow. 'She loved to talk about him so fondly…'
Raikou's heart clenched as Giovanni began crying too. Chacha had put the bear down on the ottoman guiltily and stared between the two in desperation. "Chacha is sorry! Chacha made a big mistake!"
"Shhh, shhh…! It's okay!" Raikou had quickly moved to pluck Giovanni up, and glanced sympathetically to Chacha; She meant no harm. Her crushed look proved that. Quietly, Raikou knelt beside the crying Elsa and presented her child to her. She broke from Boudica's embrace momentarily to try and soothe her crying baby. At the same time, Raikou glanced to D'Eon firmly. "Please. Do not let Marie-"
"She wouldn't. Not for something like this," the saber reassured, and Raikou nodded in understanding.
"I'm here for you if you need support…" Boudica offered quietly through her own tears. She likely related this to painful memories too.
"…Th-Thank you…" As D'Eon tried to reassure Chacha, Raikou stayed kneeling and gently rubbed Elsa's back, then joined the embrace. The employee clutched her precious baby to her chest and rocked it gently, even as her tears still fell. Raikou observed the grieving woman solemnly, who was hastily and roughly trying to recompose herself for someone else. The berserker realized she'd been this strong and supportive for so many other Chaldeans when she was struggling herself.
Raikou would say it was the strength of a mother, but that wouldn't do justice to the many others in Chaldea.
It's in this sad moment the truth of Chaldea finally dawned on her. On the outside, they looked like a crazy yet cordial community, yet how many held their own problems from sight? The answer was clear now. Her horizon seemed to grow amid this sudden, tearful crack in their world.
Some carried bigger grief and despair then others, but many were pained. How many hid their pain behind facades for one reason or another? Some out of pride, others to support those they care about, maybe others because they hated being sympathized for. Whatever the reason may be, sometimes those weaknesses like fear or despair seeped through the cracks of their carefully built wall.
…But this revelation only made Chaldea more beautiful to her.
Quietly, Raikou tightened her embrace. Boudica followed in turn. It was gentle, and hopefully exactly what the grieving mother needed to help soothe her current outburst. The berserker hoped someone would do this if it happened to her one day. The fear grew again, but as the mother shook in her arms, so too did her hope and resolve triple.
Raikou would do all she could to help preserve this home, where the many flawed and hurting souls found peace and acceptance through each other. Pained souls like hers, who thought liberation and deliverance was beyond her. As a mother, she'd gladly selfishly devote herself to keep this dream a reality. In turn, if she only had one selfish wish, it was to continue to be a part of something she shouldn't be allowed to.
Just for another day, then another, to feel human beneath it all.