A/N: I hope you're all staying well. Thanks so much for your wonderful reviews on my last chapter! I love hearing what you think! Here's the next chapter. Sorry this one took a while. But it's a long-ish chapter, so hopefully that makes up for things a bit. I hope you like this chapter. And, as always, thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

"Have I ever told you that you should quit your job and become an event planner?" Addison asks.

Savvy shrugs. "Only always," she laughs.

Savvy's not lying. This isn't the first time Addison has said this to her friend. Far from it.

Savvy always throws the best parties.

When they were in college, and everyone else was going to frat parties and drinking cheap beer, Savvy was hosting dinner parties with merlot and the perfect cheese and dessert pairings.

When Bizzy threw Addison the world's most pretentious bridal shower (a luncheon at one of her clubs with an invite list that Addison certainly wouldn't have put together), Savvy picked up the pieces and threw her an actual bridal shower with people she actually wanted to celebrate with. And it was nothing short of amazing.

From spa weekends, to vacations, to parties, Savvy always handles the bulk of the planning, and it's always flawless.

So, Addison isn't surprised that Weiss' birthday weekend is no different. Right now, being case and point.

They're on their way to Weiss' favorite vineyard in the Hamptons for a wine tasting. And so that nobody has to worry about being the designated driver, Savvy rented a limo.

"Savvy really is the best party planner," Nancy agrees, ripping Addison from her thoughts.

"You're both too kind," Savvy insists modestly.

"It's the truth," Nancy persists. "The dance party idea that you suggested for Lauren's twelfth birthday ... she and her friends are still talking about what a great party that was." She turns to Savvy and gives her an amused smile. "I hope you've got something good up your sleeve for next year. Thirteen's a big one."

"I'm on it," Savvy laughs.

"I still remember the party you threw me and Addison for our fifth anniversary," Derek chimes in. "That was a good party."

And Addison can't help looking at him in surprise. Apparently, he remembers the good times, he just doesn't miss them.

"It was a good party," Savvy agrees.

"Yeah," Weiss grumbles, the irritation in his voice a sharp contrast to everyone else's lighthearted tones. He eyes Derek critically. "If you liked that party, you would have loved the party Savvy threw for your tenth anniversary."

"Weiss," Savvy cuts in gently. "Let's not—"

"Savvy didn't throw us a party for our tenth anniversary," Derek insists.

He looks to Addison for confirmation, and while she doesn't say anything verbally, he can read her silence loud and clear. Don't go there.

But against his better judgment, he does.

"When," he asks in confusion. "I don't remember."

"Of course you don't remember," Weiss tells Derek snidely. "It's because you never showed up."

"What?"

"Weiss," Addison cuts in. "Maybe now's not the—"

"It was supposed to be a surprise party," Weiss continues coldly, his eyes fixed squarely on Derek. "Only the big surprise was on all of us ... you didn't show up."

"But I ..."

Had to work. He can't say that. Not after the conversation that he and Addison had last night.

"I ..."

But what can he really say?

"I'm sorry," he says weakly.

"Don't apologize to me," Weiss snaps. "I was embarrassed to call you my friend that night, but you not being there didn't completely ruin my evening. I still drank champagne and ate caviar."

"Savvy," he meets his friend's eyes. "I'm sorry."

Savvy nods silently. And it's another silence he can read perfectly. If he wants things to be okay between him and Savvy, it's not Savvy he needs to apologize to.

"Addie," he swallows roughly. "I'm really sorry. I'm ... so sorry."

Addison shrugs noncommittally. "Water under the bridge."

He can't explain it, but her response causes something inside of him to hurt.

He wasn't expecting her to accept his apology, but he was expecting her to acknowledge it. She flat out dismissed it. And it knocked the wind right out of him.

Maybe it's fair. He did it to her.

"And now I'm sorry. I'm more sorry than you could possibly imagine. But, at least, I'm talking about it."

"I'm a sink with an open drain, Addie."

He shakes his head sadly, and mentally berates himself for parroting a metaphor to address an actual problem.

If he's being honest, he can't blame Addison for responding the way she did. And maybe he should drop the issue all together.

But he can't.

He wants to know more about the anniversary party he missed. And he wants her to know that he's sorry. He wants to talk about it.

"Here we are." the limo driver says, cutting into his thoughts. "Is this the place?"

"Yes. Thanks so much," Savvy smiles; and it's impossible to miss the relief in her voice. "We'll be back in a couple of hours."

She bolts out of the limo as if she were being shot out of a canon. And everyone else follows suit.

"Nancy, wait," Derek says, grabbing his sister's wrist and forcing her to stay behind.

His sister looks at him curiously and Derek casts his eyes downward.

"The anniversary party that I missed ..." he trails off, still not able to meet his sister's eyes. "I was just ..." He swallows thickly. "When I try to picture what it must have been like in my head, I can't. It was bad, wasn't it?"

"That's putting it mildly," Nancy sniffs.

"Nancy. Come on."

"What?" Nancy defends. "You asked. You said you couldn't imagine what it must have been like. And I'm telling you that whatever you can imagine, it was worse."

Derek nods mutely, not sure what to say.

"Think about it, Derek," Nancy continues. "Could you imagine being stood up by your spouse on your tenth anniversary in front of all your family and friends? I'd be so embarrassed. And so angry. And just ... really, really hurt."

Again, Derek nods silently. He and Nancy are world-class arguers; but there's not much he can disagree with here.

"And even though Addison's too classy to say anything," Nancy goes on, "it was pretty clear that this wasn't the first time you did something like this to her. Just the most public."

"Nancy, I –"

"I'd kill John if he ever did something like that to me."

"I know," Derek says quietly.

"And you wonder why everyone back East sides with Addie," Nancy continues. "It's not just that she keeps in touch with us. We witnessed the breakdown of your marriage and we know —"

"That I'm the villain!?" Derek fills in angrily, his temper suddenly flaring. "Is that what you all know?"

"I didn't say that, Derek," Nancy says coolly. "Relax."

"No. No, I won't relax," Derek fumes. "You said you'd kill John if he stood you up on your anniversary. But are you saying that you wouldn't kill him if he cheated on you with your best friend?"

"I'm not saying that either," Nancy defends. "I'm just saying that everyone back home knows enough to know that neither of you are innocent. She's just the only one who's a big enough person to admit it."

Derek swallows roughly. He knows Nancy's right. Addison didn't cheat in a vacuum. They both played a part in the breakdown of their marriage. He said as much to Addison just last night.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he whispers.

"What?"

"Why didn't you tell me about our tenth anniversary party and how hurt Addison was?"

Nancy shakes her head sadly. "Would it have mattered?"

He wants to insist that of course it would have mattered; but for some reason, he can't seem to find his voice.

"And anyway," Nancy continues, taking advantage of his silence, "I'm not the person you should be having this conversation with."

"Yeah," Derek sighs. "I know."

He thinks about his and Addison's walk on the beach this morning, and how he still needs to talk to her about that. And now there's this – the tenth anniversary party that he hadn't realized he'd missed.

He meets his sister's eyes. "Do you think she'll talk to me?"

"I don't see why not," Nancy shrugs. "You two seemed pretty friendly last night."

"Nancy." He shakes his head disapprovingly.

"And last night is none of my business," Nancy continues, holding her hands up innocently. "But, yes, I think she'll talk to you. She doesn't walk away when things get tough. She isn't you, Derek."

"That's not – "

"It's true enough," Nancy cuts in.

"Seriously, Nancy, don't hold back. I'd hate for you to go easy on me, just one time."

"I'm your older sister," Nancy reminds him. "My job isn't to go easy on you."

"You deserve a raise, then," Derek mutters.

"I'm glad you think so," Nancy chuckles. "But," she continues, growing serious, "my job is also to give you advice when you need it. And you clearly need it." She presses her lips together thoughtfully. "We don't get many second chances ... not meaningful ones, at least. If we lose a patient in the OR, we don't get a second chance to bring them back to life. If we don't do well in a job interview or if we deliver a bad conference paper, we don't get a redo. I'd be lying if I said that this is a part of adulthood that I enjoy. But it is part of being an adult."

"What's your point, Nancy?"

"My point is that we don't often get second chances, especially not as adults. But, for whatever reason, you and Addison ... you two keep getting all these extra chances. And I'd hate to see you let these chances slip through your fingers. Because while you and Addison keep getting these extra chances, eventually, you won't. Because life isn't full of unlimited chances."

He nods mutely, letting it all sink in.

We don't get unlimited chances to have the things we want.

"Now," Nancy continues, clearing her throat authoritatively, "I'm not going to be a bossy older sister and tell you what to do or how to live your live, but ..." she pauses for a moment, "just think about it, okay?"

xxxxx

As much as he hates to admit it, Nancy might be right. He needs to talk to Addison. And the list of things he needs to talk to her about is growing fast.

He finds her sitting at a table with the others, sipping wine and picking at the charcuterie board.

"I swear, Savvy," Addison quips, as Derek sits down next to her, "we're all going to go home from this weekend five pounds heavier."

"Calories don't count when you're celebrating," Savvy insists.

"I'm afraid my scale begs to differ," Nancy disagrees.

It's while his friends are debating the caloric value of celebratory food and drinks that Derek discretely leans in towards his ex-wife.

"Addie," he whispers. "Feel like taking a break from all this eating and drinking for a few minutes?"

"No, not really."

"Come on, Addison."

"Can't it wait until later?"

"No," he insists. "It can't." He sighs. "Ten minutes ... that's all I'm asking for."

"Why?"

"Please, Addison?"

"I'll give you five," she bargains.

"That's not enough," he insists, a small smile forming on his face. He's gaining ground and he knows it. "How about eight?"

"Seven—"

"And a half," he fills in, his smile growing wider.

"Fine. Seven-and-a-half minutes," she agrees reluctantly.

"Really?" he asks in surprise. He knew she was caving; he just wasn't expecting her to give in so quickly.

"Yeah. You better hurry, though," she adds, standing up from her seat. She points to her watch. "The clock's started."

He quickly stands up and ushers her away from everyone else.

Once they're safely out of their friends' earshot, she turns to him. "What's so important that it couldn't wait, Derek?"

"I'm sorry," he says softly. "For standing you up at our anniversary party. I'm really sorry, Addison."

"You mentioned that already," she shrugs, unimpressed.

"Addison, please." He clears his throat uncomfortably. "I want you to know that I'm sorry."

"Okay, so I know."

He sighs in frustration. She's not going to make this easy on him.

And maybe he shouldn't be surprised. He didn't make things easy on her when she tried to apologize in Seattle. And Addison has always been his true equal in every way.

Which is why he can't let this go. She didn't go down without a fight in Seattle. He's not going down without a fight here.

"Why didn't you tell me that I missed our anniversary party?" Derek asks quietly.

"What makes you think I didn't?"

He swallows thickly. She phrased it as a question, but he knows her well enough to know, it's anything but.

"More than once?" he asks, casting his eyes downward. He can't bring himself to meet her eyes. "Did you tell me more than once?"

"Yes."

"More than twice?" he asks, cringing.

"Derek," she says sadly, "we don't have to do this."

"Yes, we do," he insists.

"Derek ... come on. Don't do this."

"I'm not. I'm just ... " he pauses. "Tell me about the party."

"What?"

He can't blame her for being surprised. To be honest, he was surprised as well – the words came out of his mouth as though independent of his brain. But he finds himself doubling down.

"I want to know about the anniversary party."

"You want to know about the anniversary party that you missed?" she clarifies.

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"Because I do."

"Then you should have come to it."

"Addison," Derek pleads.

"Derek, we don't have to do this," she repeats. "We don't have to perform a post mortem on our marriage. We can go back to our friends, and we can drink too much wine and eat too much cheese. And you and I can make polite conversation. We don't need to make this more difficult than it already is."

He nods mutely, and she turns to walk away.

"Addison, wait."

She turns and looks at him tiredly.

"I thought you should know ..." he swallows hard, his throat thick. "I mean, I want you to know ... Addie, I cheated."

"Yeah, we both did," she says simply.

"No, not like that. I mean, technically, yes. But that's not what I was talking about."

She looks at him in confusion, silently urging him to continue.

"This morning on the beach," he clarifies. "I cheated at truth or dare."

She shakes her head in bewilderment. "What are you talking about, Derek."

"You asked if I missed this. And I said no. But the truth is it's not that simple."

She nods slowly, taking it all in.

"Addie ...?"

"I always forget how beautiful this vineyard is," she muses, looking around.

She's pivoting hard – Derek knows this. He just has no idea where she's going with this.

She meets his eyes and gives him a soft smile. "Do you want to walk through the vineyard with me?"

He feels the corners of his mouth twitching upwards. "That's going to take longer than seven-and-half minutes," he points out, glancing at his watch.

"Overtime," she shrugs.

"You hate sports analogies," he chuckles.

"I do," she agrees. "But I hate them less when I make them."

xxxxx

She could be drinking wine right now. She could be eating her body weight in cured meats and cheeses.

But she's not.

Instead, she's walking through the vineyard with her ex-husband. And what's worse, she was the one who made the suggestion.

She could be taking part in Weiss' birthday celebrations. She was en route to doing so. It was that simple.

But she's never done simple.

Not in college when she overloaded her schedule. Not in her career when she became a double-board certified surgeon. And certainly not in her relationship with Derek – as of late, at least.

He was vulnerable, he was open ... and she couldn't bring herself to walk away from that.

So, here they are, walking through the vineyard – which she'll admit is lovely – trying to pick up where they left off this morning.

Take two. Take three, actually. This morning's walk on the beach was take two.

The thing is, he's not saying anything. And maybe that's fair. After all, she was the one who invited him to walk with her.

"There were about fifty people there," she begins quietly. "Give or take."

"What?" he looks at her in confusion.

She gives him pointed look, and from the way his eyes cast downward, she knows they're on the same page now.

Their tenth anniversary party.

"Sam and Naomi flew in for it," she continues. "And all of your sisters were there. Your mother too. Not my parents. Archer showed up, though. Solo." She shakes her head, half in amusement, half in disgust. "He didn't leave solo. Some of our colleagues came. And a couple of friends from med school. And Mark."

The details she can talk about. She can talk about the details all day – what she was wearing, the party décor, what the menu consisted of.

What she's carefully avoiding is how she felt.

"It was cute," she goes on. "Each table had pictures of us at the age that corresponded with the table number. So pictures of us when we were one at table one. Pictures of us as two-years-old at table two. Let's see, what else ...?" she continues. "I wore Chanel. Louboutin heels, of course, and –"

"Don't dance around this, Addie."

"Dancing," Addison nods, not missing a beat. "There was dancing that night."

"Addison. Come on."

"What, Derek?" she asks innocently. "You wanted to know about the anniversary party you missed, and I'm telling you. Now, where was I?" She looks pensive for a moment. "Oh, yes. Savvy was wearing—"

"Addison, I really don't care what Savvy was wearing."

"Your loss," Addison shrugs. "It was a really great dress."

"Addison, don't do this."

"Don't do what?" she asks calmly. "Is there something you want to know that I haven't told you about yet?"

The moment the words leave her mouth, she regrets it.

In Seattle, Derek wouldn't have taken her up on her offer. But the Derek she's been interacting with this weekend most certainly will.

"How did you get through that night?" Derek asks, going for the jugular and proving her point perfectly. "I mean, it couldn't have been easy."

Addison shrugs. "It was easier than you'd think."

Derek looks at her in disbelief. "I stood you up in front of our family and friends at our tenth anniversary party. What part of that could possibly be easy?"

"I didn't say it was easy," Addison corrects. "I said it was easier than you'd think." She meets his eyes sadly. "That wasn't the first time something like that happened, Derek. There were so many missed dinner reservations and missed holidays. So when you didn't show up that night, I wasn't completely blindsided."

"Ad—"

"And I just ... talked about how proud I was of you," she continues. "I went on and on about how important your work is, and how when you're a surgeon, things like this happen. That's what Bizzy used to do when my father didn't show up to events because he was off screwing some nurse or intern."

She watches the way he winces, as if in physical pain.

It should feel good. But it doesn't. It's almost too much for her to take. Reliving that night—and the way she got through it—is painful enough. But Derek's reaction—his remorse, and the way he understands things that nobody else could—just may break her.

"We don't have to keep talking about this, Derek," she says, doing her best to keep her voice stoic. "We could talk about the flowers. We haven't talked about the floral arrangements yet."

xxxxx

He doesn't want to talk about the floral arrangements. Admittedly, under most circumstances he wouldn't want to talk about floral arrangements. But especially not now.

"Addison," he chokes out ... mostly because he doesn't know what else there is for him to say.

He hates everything about this.

He knows that there's nothing Addison wants less in life than to turn into her mother. And he hates the fact that he put her in a situation where she found herself channeling Bizzy ... even following Bizzy's example.

He hates the fact that, in this situation, he's the Captain ... a man he's never respected. And he keeps hearing Addison's words, because he was off screwing some nurse or intern, playing over and over in his head, as if on repeat.

He can't help thinking about the prom. It was a night that he was once proud of. But now, looking back on it, he doesn't understand how he ever could have felt proud about it. Now he just feels nauseous.

He hates it. Every last bit of it.

"Truth or dare, Addison?"

"What?" she looks at him in surprise.

"You heard me." He stops walking, and motions for her to do the same. "Truth or dare? And pick truth."

She looks at him skeptically and sighs in resignation. "Fine. Truth."

He nods approvingly. "Will you let me make this up to you?"

"Derek, there's nothing to make up to me. You're off the hook. We're divorced. You have no obligation to try with me anymore."

"Yeah, but ..."

Her response is perfectly reasonable and perfectly rational, but he can't help being unsatisfied by it.

"You didn't answer my question," he points out. "It's a yes, no question, Addison."

She sighs in defeat and meets his eyes. "Then no," she says quietly. "There's no point."

"Then why are you here with me now?" he whispers.

"I..." she swallows thickly. "I don't know."

"Yes, you do."

He's right, of course. She's there right now for the same reason he was there after Bizzy's outburst last night – because they can't not be there.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, leaning in close. "For missing our anniversary ... for prom ... for all of Seattle, actually."

"I know you are," she whispers back, her cheek brushing against his, her hair falling in his face like it has hundreds of time in the past.

She pulls away, but the familiar scent of her perfume lingers in the air around him. And he finds himself inhaling deeply, taking it all in.

Addison didn't forgive him. But her response wasn't dismissive either. It was acknowledgment ... recognition.

And while he would have preferred forgiveness, he can't help thinking that maybe her response is appropriate – for now, at least. She's recognizing him; and he realizes, as he watches her walk ahead of him, that for the first time in a long time, he's seeing her.

"Derek?" she turns and looks at him in concern. "Do you want to keep walking?"

Apparently, he's been so busy watching her—seeing her—that he stopped walking.

She extends her hand to him – the way she has so many times in the past. And he can't tell if she's doing it intentionally or out of habit.

Whatever the reason, he's not about to question it.

"Yeah," he smiles, taking her hand. "Let's keep walking."

Two steps forward, one step back – that's how he'd characterize their weekend so far.

But she's giving him the chance to take more steps forward. It's a small gesture, but it's also one of those extra chances that Nancy would tell him not to let slip through his fingers.

And he won't – and it's not just because her hand is in his.

A/N 2: Thanks so much for reading! I hope you liked this chapter. And fun fact: I was totally Savvy in college, throwing wine and cheese parties while everyone else was drinking beer :)