Presents of Mind
"Can't we open one of the presents tonight?" Kelly asked in a borderline whining tone.
Casey tried not to laugh as he entered the living room and saw Kelly sitting on the floor by the tree looking at the small pile of wrapped gifts stored around it.
"I swear, Kelly, you get more excited about Christmas than any kid I ever knew," he said.
"So what?" Severide replied without missing a beat.
"Christmas isn't for three days," Casey said.
"Just one wouldn't hurt," Kelly insisted.
Casey mulled it over for a minute before asking Severide, "You got a particular one in mind?"
"Yeah," Kelly answered.
"Yours or mine?"
"Yours," Kelly said.
That was a bit surprising.
"Okay, just one," Casey said as he got down on his knees and looked over the presents, "I'll pick one for you."
Kelly already grabbed the one he got for Casey. Matt picked up a large and semi-flexible package wrapped in red paper with stars on it and gave it to Kelly, who in turn handed him a larger, wider, more solid gift wrapped in metallic green paper.
"So how does this work?" Casey asked. "Do we both go at once?"
"I'll go first," Kelly answered, "Just because the best is for last."
Matt snorted at his comment.
Kelly ripped the paper clear down the middle and in one swift movement it puddled on the floor and he saw what he'd gotten was an extra large crossword puzzle book with over 300 puzzles in it. He laughed and told Matt, "You know me."
"Like a book," Casey joked in response. "I figure that'll keep you busy for a little while."
"I love it," Kelly said. "Now open yours."
Matt was curious why Kelly was so eager for him to unwrap this particular present and so early. He looked at it and for a brief moment tried to guess what might be inside, but he couldn't. He grabbed the taped up edge of the paper and pulled it loose and slowly ripped it open to reveal a box, and when he opened the lid and saw his present, his eyes widened and he was speechless for a moment.
Kelly was biting his bottom lip in eager anticipation. "Do you like it?"
Casey smiled sheepishly, but before he'd answer, he asked Kelly, "Does anyone else know about this?"
Kelly shook his head, "No."
"I love it," Casey answered without missing a beat, and lunged on his knees to close the gap between them and wrapped one arm around Kelly and hugged him. "Thank you." Kelly had just barely put his arm around Casey to reciprocate the hug when Casey pulled back from him and asked, "Where-how did you find this?"
"I got lucky," was all Kelly was willing to say on the subject.
Two nights before Christmas and Kelly Severide couldn't sleep. He was feeling a combination of things, he couldn't make up his mind whether he was thirsty, hungry, or if he had indigestion from the pizza they'd had for dinner. He guessed there was more to it than that, but on his way to the kitchen, he took a little detour, first to the living room to stop and look at the tree, which still had the lights on, and just stood there in awe for a moment how the tinsel and ornaments sparkled and shone in the colored lights. Then he did a U-turn and headed back towards the bedrooms, and quietly slipped into Casey's room.
The older he got, the more Kelly realized he was a man of creature comforts, and he guessed the truth of the matter was that everybody was. There were certain things that he had to have a certain way to truly feel at peace. When he slept in his own bed at home instead of his bunk at the station house, he liked one fat and one flat pillow together under his head, together they were the perfect thickness between his head and the mattress. In bed he liked the feel of the soft sheets brushing against the bottom of his feet, he'd never admit it to anyone, but it was a comforting sensation.
There were other kinds of comforts he was accustomed to, and again, he guessed everybody else was. A lot of them traced back to when he was a kid, and he knew everybody had some of those. To unwind after a stressful day when the whole world seemed to be caving in on them, some people liked to sit around in their underwear eating Froot Loops binge watching "Power Rangers". He knew some people that still had their handheld video games from 20 years ago and even though some of them had been designed practically impossible to beat, would wile away an hour or two going through all the levels just as they had when they were 10 years old. There was a reason "Space Jam" was his favorite movie, granted he'd been older when it came out, but it still took him back to better times when he was younger. He still remembered sitting in that theater during open weekend, and even though he was in high school, he'd felt all of 6 years old again.
He'd known Casey long enough to know he was a man of various comforts too. Unlike he, who preferred to sleep in total darkness or the closest thing to it, Casey took more comfort sleeping in a lit room so when he woke up he knew where he was, and he knew incase anything happened, he wouldn't be running into the furniture trying to get out. He also knew that in the winter Casey liked to sleep covered with a big plush blanket under the sheet and comforter. And more recently, Kelly had discovered Casey also had at least one custom that ran back to his childhood. He wouldn't have known it, as roommates the two of them respected each other's privacy, if one wasn't up when the other was, they might bang on the door or yell through the wall, but they didn't just barge in on each other. But one morning as Kelly was getting breakfast ready, Casey hadn't come out of his room, so he went, and he knocked on the door, but there was no answer. He turned the knob and opened the door and was met with an unusual sight. Matt Casey, Truck lieutenant at 51, a fireman for over 15 years, his best friend who he thought he knew everything about, was curled on his side in bed clutching a weathered Chicago Bears teddy bear that had seen better days.
He wasn't even aware when Casey woke up, it just seemed that suddenly there were two eyes, awake but not fully alert, staring at him, and he was embarrassed to be standing there, but Casey seemed oblivious as he asked, "What's going on?"
"I knocked, I didn't hear you...I thought..."
Casey followed Kelly's eyes and looked down and realized what it was Severide was staring at and made a small sound of acknowledgement as he said, still with the teddy bear's neck gripped in the crook of his elbow, "I suppose you're wondering about this."
"I...it's none of my business," Kelly said.
"Go ahead, you can laugh," Casey said as he sat up, "This was Christie's when we were kids. Somebody gave it to her for Christmas one year, and after a couple of years she decided she didn't want it anymore, so she gave it to me." He sighed as he explained, "My mom used to keep it on the other side of my bed so I wouldn't feel alone...I guess it worked, I never paid much attention. It got packed away in my closet somewhere and I didn't find it again until I was in high school...even at that time it was a collector's item, so I couldn't get rid of it...one night I tossed and turned and tried everything I could think of to fall asleep, and nothing helped...so I thought," he nodded towards the large and well worn bear, "What could it hurt to try? Fell asleep in about 10 minutes, I can't explain it, but, it works, even now, the nights I can't sleep," he pointed towards the raggedy animal.
Kelly felt that he was officially dumbstruck. He still felt like he'd intruded on something he shouldn't have, and he wasn't sure what to make of the fact that Casey didn't seem to mind whatsoever that he knew.
He was just guessing that either Casey played with it too much as a kid, or he'd had a lot of sleepless nights in his life, one of the eyes was gone from the bear, the fur was threadbare in some places and one of the ears looked like it'd been chewed on until it was practically a nub.
As if reading his mind, Casey sighed and unconsciously hugged it against him as he said, "I know the day's coming when it's just going to all fall apart..."
And Kelly Severide would be damned if he didn't see Casey's eyes shine with a sudden onset of tears as he said it.
That was when Kelly knew exactly what Casey needed for Christmas. It had taken a lot of looking and Casey would never know what he spent for it, but it was worth every cent to see that look on his best friend's face the other night when he opened his present.
And afterwards, Kelly had pointed out, Casey could pack the original in plastic and keep it just for the sake of keeping it, and use this one which was in much better condition and practically looked new.
And now, Kelly just stepped through the threshold to Casey's bedroom, dimly lit by a couple of flickering LED candles he'd gotten from the Christmas section of the store, and saw Casey, curled up under the covers, comforter on top, sheet in the middle, and the plush blanket underneath, hugging his new teddy bear in his sleep, and Kelly almost laughed as he realized Casey had one of its ears lodged in his mouth as he slept. Kelly backed out of the room and headed back to bed, quietly laughing all the way. Some things truly didn't change.