A Box of Memories

What if Donna and Lily had in fact met during the timeline of season 9? Set after the end of season 9, this is my slight tweak to what we think happened, as we see Donna and Harvey share their first Christmas Eve together.

Twas the night before Christmas, so when better to post a new Darvey story? I started this one shot in December 2019, but never managed to finish it over the Christmas period and spookily came back to type up the end today, exactly 365 days later according to ! I'm a bit rusty, but I hope this helps me get back in to my Suits writing! As it's been a while, reviews / feedback if you liked it would be particularly welcome!

…...

The bedroom was empty when Donna emerged from the bathroom. She was a little surprised to find herself alone, expecting Harvey to be sitting up in bed reading, something he'd now often do as he waited for her to come to bed. Yet tonight, the room was empty.

She'd found it surreal being back in her New York apartment and a wave of nostalgia had hit her the moment they'd walked through the door of the familiar surroundings the day before. They may have settled in Seattle over the last six months, enjoying a life that was more relaxed than the hectic pace of life in New York at the firm, but it didn't feel like home; not yet anyway and returning here for Christmas had been the natural choice. Tomorrow, they'd spend Christmas Day at the Zane's home with Mike and Rachel, as well as Louis and Sheila, who would have used anything as an excuse to show off little Lucy and spend time with their friends and were happy to celebrate all the religious holidays that mattered to both of them. They then intended to head to Connecticut, to see Donna's parents, before celebrating the New Year with Marcus and the kids. To Harvey's relief, his brother and wife had decided to give their marriage another chance, which meant there had been no possibility of him being alone at Christmas.

Slipping her silk robe over her shoulders, Donna moved through to the living room, to find the area bathed in a low light and the twinkle of the lights from the Christmas tree. She'd insisted on decorating her apartment when they'd arrived, leading to a frantic dash for a tree from the man selling them on a street close to her own. Harvey had simply raised an eyebrow in amusement at her passionate love of the holiday and followed her lead, struggling to fit the fir tree in to the elevator of her building and then dutifully helping her dress it with lights. Having already done this in Seattle, it meant was almost like two Christmas holidays in one year. During his adult life, he'd grown used to letting the season mostly pass him by and Donna's enthusiasm was exactly what he needed at the start of their first Christmas together as a couple.

Harvey was sitting on the couch, a large circular box on the coffee table in front of him. His dark jeans and sweater conveyed a relaxed image, yet she could see the tension he was holding within his body, as his eyes remained fixed on the box. She'd wondered when this moment would arrive, her mind wandering back to the time, all those months ago, when they first discussed its very existence.

….

SIX MONTHS EARLIER

Harvey dropped their bags by the bedroom of his apartment, as Donna moved wordlessly to make some coffee. It had been an emotionally draining few days in Boston and yet being home didn't seem to bring any sense of peace. Here, there was the looming presence of Faye to deal with, on top of the grief Harvey was struggling with since the loss of his mother. She watched him sink down on to the couch with a sigh and her heart ached for him. The cruelty of seeing him robbed of his mother when they'd only just started to have a relationship again made Donna angry at the world and she would do everything she could to help him carry his pain.

Holding two mugs of steaming coffee, she crossed the room, before taking a seat next to him and reaching for his hand. "Are you hungry? I can make something to eat."

He shook his head with a grateful smile. "No, I'm fine. Thanks….and thank you for today. I couldn't have got through it without you."

"I'm here for whatever you need, Harvey. Always."

He nodded, before closing his eyes momentarily. "I miss her, Donna."

"I know and I'm so sorry, Harvey," she whispered, leaning in to him on the couch. As the silence of their thoughts took hold of the room, Donna let out a deep breath. She'd been wrestling with a secret of her own, ever since she'd been told the terrible news about Lily and she couldn't keep it from him any longer. Taking his hand in both of hers, she sighed.

"Harvey….I have something I need to tell you. I don't know if this is the right time, but I….."

Turning his body to fully face her, he gave her hand a squeeze. "Hey…..what is it? You can tell me."

"It's about your mom…"

Harvey swallowed; just the words causing a new wave of grief to hit him. "Okay….." His voice was quieter now, as his eyes met hers.

"I did meet her, Harvey."

Her words caught him off guard and surprise and confusion filled his eyes. "I don't…When?"

"Last week. She called me out of the blue, to see if we were free for lunch, as she was in the city for a museum exhibition. You and Alex were already in court for the day on the Perkins case, but she was still keen to meet me…..so we did. She couldn't stay late, as she had an evening class."

Harvey simply stared. "You never said," he responded after a few moments.

"Everything with Faye…your trip with Samantha…..and Malik….and then….." Her voice trailed away, still struggling to accept the unfairness of the events of the past few days. In just a few days their world had turned upside down, not leaving her a moment to tell him. She'd been looking forward to surprising him with the news once things had settled down.

Harvey was quiet, as he processed this new information. Donna not meeting his mother in person had become something he was deeply upset and angry about. After everything they'd been through, seeing the two most important women in his life get to know one another had filled him with a nervous excitement, which had all been drained from him in one night. Discovering that they had in fact met, even if he hadn't been there himself, eased the pain he felt just a little and he smiled sadly.

"I'm glad," he whispered after a moment of quiet. "I wish I'd been there….."

"I know," Donna replied, offering his hand another squeeze. "I do too."

The room was silent; each of them lost in their own thoughts and grief. It was her need to see Harvey smile again that caused Donna to break the quiet.

"Although…I'm sure I heard far more stories about you than I would have, had you been there."

Harvey let out a quiet laugh, somewhat relieved to have an outlet for the colliding emotions within him. He could only begin to imagine what his mom had been saying in his absence; yet knowing she'd shared some of those precious memories with Donna warmed his heart. It's how things were meant to be.

"Dare I even ask?"

Donna leaned against him, resting her head against his shoulder. "I don't know. Do you dare?"

Drawing her in to his arms, Harvey dropped a kiss to the top of her head. "Why don't you tell me."

She shifted in his arms, so that she could meet his gaze. He looked so tired, but at least her news seemed to have lifted his spirit just a little. "Before I do, there's something I need to give to you."

He frowned, as Donna stood up and disappeared in to the bedroom, before returning a few minutes later, carrying a circular box. It reminded him of the boxes his grandmother had stored her hats in when she was alive. They'd fascinated him at the time, the concept of a hat needing a box at all had puzzled him.

As Donna moved closer, he realised that it was one of his grandmother's hatboxes. He was almost certain he recognised the patterns and colours around its edge. His eyes met Donna's and she saw the recognition and confusion within them.

"She said you'd probably remember this box. I understand your grandmother was quite the fashionista for her day. She sounded like my kind of woman!"

Moving next to him, tucking her feet underneath her, she gestured to the box. "She brought this with her to lunch. She'd just finished it and was excited to share her plan with me….It's your Christmas gift."

Harvey stared at the box. "But, it's not Christmas," he murmured, his voice quiet and full of vulnerability.

"No, it's not, but it's still her gift to you, Harvey. She wasn't sure what we'd be planning for the holidays this year. I don't think she wanted to assume we'd be going to Boston, so she gave it to me, to keep safe for you."

Harvey reached for the box, his hand resting against the smooth surface of the lid, just as it had when he'd been a child. "Why are you telling me now?"

Donna sighed and shifted next to him, sitting forward, feet back on the floor, mirroring his position. "Because it didn't feel right to keep it from you now, to keep anything about her from you."

His focus remaining on the box, Harvey simply nodded, as he pictured his mother meeting Donna and giving this gift to her, something clearly very personal that she wanted him to have. His mind wandered to the envelope in his jacket pocket, which had almost broken him back at the house in Boston when Marcus had given it to him. He'd still not yet found the strength to read the letter that was within it and yet now here was another link to his mother, on the table in front of him.

Withdrawing his hand from the box, he turned his eyes back to Donna. "I'm going to wait."

"Are you sure?"

"Christmas gifts should be opened at Christmas," he replied quietly, his eyes dropping to his lap.

Wrapping her arms around him, Donna kissed his cheek, as Harvey pulled her closer in to his arms, dropping his head on to her shoulder. The day had taken all the strength he had and all he needed now was her and some sleep.

Running a hand through his hair gently, Donna kissed his head. "I'll hold on to it for you, Harvey. Until you're ready."

After a few minutes, he drew a breath and let it out again slowly, the way Dr. Lipschitz had taught him. Lifting his head, he met her gaze and smiled. "You still need to tell me what stories you heard."

Donna smiled, before kissing him softly. "Shall I start with the most embarrassing, or the least?"

…..

Bringing herself back to the present, Donna took a deep breath, before moving across the room to sit beside Harvey, squeezing his shoulder as she took a seat next to him.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I think I'm ready to open this."

Donna simply nodded, her eyes focussing on the box, before returning to her husband's face. She hadn't pushed him about the gift from his mother, knowing he'd come to his own decision about when it was the right time to open it. She hadn't been sure he'd actually be ready to open it at Christmas.

"I can give you some time, Harvey…..if you need it."

With a shake of his head, he reached for her hand. "No Donna. I want you with me. I'm sure my mom would too."

Without another word, Harvey sat forward, elbows resting on his knees; his eyes fixed on the box placed on the table in front of him. As he reached gingerly for the lid, Donna moved her hand to his knee, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

Releasing a shaky breath, he removed the lid, setting it aside on the table. For a moment he wondered what had happened to the hat that had once rested within this box. A blurry memory from childhood brought his grandmother in a dark green coloured one to mind. He had always loved the colour. Shaking the thoughts aside, he focussed his attention on the contents. One word perfectly described what he saw.

Memories.

Reaching inside, he touched paper held with rubber bands - handmade birthday and Mother's Day cards and the drawings created by a young child still happy within his home and family. Pulling out a Mother's Day card, he released another breath. "I remember making this. I was 6 maybe. Everyone in the class wanted to make the best card."

Donna remained quiet, but moved closer to him on the couch, her side against his; an unspoken message that she was there for him to lean on.

Every card and picture he'd ever created for his mother was in the box. Lifting them out, Harvey placed the small pile on the table to focus on later. Next, was a set of school reports, reflecting his developing personality. A chuckle escaped him on seeing one of the papers and he passed it to Donna so she could read it for herself.

"...Harvey is too easily distracted and needs to apply himself in class. He has so much potential."

Donna smiled, squeezing the crook of his arm affectionately. "Easily distracted from working? I'm shocked," she teased.

"I'm guessing all of yours were a parent's dream?" His eyes twinkled with admiration as he spoke.

With a shrug, Donna replied. "What can I say? I've never had a bad review, as a child, or as an adult."

Harvey saw the playful glint in her eye and smirked. "No bad reviews from me." He laughed, grateful that she was trying to help keep the mood light.

His attention returning to the box, he noticed two envelopes tucked underneath the reports and he slid them out, resting them on his lap. He recognised the handwriting immediately and Donna felt his body tense. She didn't need him to tell her, for her to know who the author was.

"I thought I'd lost these. He'd write sometimes, when he was on the road and include notes for Marcus and me. I have some of them, but I knew there'd been more..."

Donna's eyes filled with unshed tears for him and for the young boy she pictured in her mind eagerly reading through a note from his beloved father while he was away. "She told me over lunch that she'd been having a clearout and found some things she knew you'd want to have. She was excited for you to see what was in this box Harvey."

Harvey glanced to her, closing his eyes briefly, before getting to his feet and wandering in to the kitchen for a drink. Without asking, he poured two tumblers of scotch and passed one to Donna as he returned to the couch. She'd been planning a relatively early night, ready for their busy Christmas Day at the Zane's, but Harvey needed this night and whatever he needed from her she'd give, just as she'd done from the first day they met.

Harvey silently turned over the notes in his hand a couple of times before setting them aside. "You don't need to do this all tonight Harvey," Donna murmured softly. "You can give yourself some time."

"I know."

Taking a moment, Harvey considered closing the box for the night, but he knew he needed to know what else his Mom had found and been so excited for him to have. It had been important to her and therefore it made it even more special to him now that she was gone.

A rectangular flip book photo album was the next item he pulled from the box and he smiled at the label stuck to the front, in his mother's familiar handwriting - Family. One word; simple and carrying more meaning for Harvey than it would for many others. His family had been broken for so long and his mother had been hoping that they were far enough down the road after their reconciliation for him to understand the need for her to give that sense of family back to him and as Harvey flicked through the photographs he did understand and was more grateful than he'd have ever been able to express.

There were images of little league games, BBQs in the backyard, of him and Marcus with their father at Vic's recording studio and family days out; all four of them smiling and happy. And at the back was a final photo that he wasn't sure he'd ever seen before, of him and his mother standing next to the finished painting that Donna had retrieved only a few months ago; one that had always carried so much meaning.

"I don't remember this being taken. It must have been as soon as she finished it. Dad must have taken it."

Donna stared at the image. She'd grown so accustomed to the image of young Harvey watching his mother at work on the picture and the painting itself had become such a part of Harvey over the years, that seeing another insight in to the memory affected her more than she expected and she squeezed Harvey's hand tighter, as much for her as for him, as tears filled her eyes once again.

"Now I understand why she was so excited about this gift, Harvey. I suspected it was something from your childhood, but this...this box is wonderful. All these memories."

The last items in the box, held together with a rubber band, were four rewritable CDs, each resting in a clear plastic case on to which Lily had written in permanent pen exactly what was held on each one. Birthdays and Christmases and even a portion of a little league game. Harvey felt the tears threatening to fall, but he didn't try and stop them; not as he would have done only a few years ago. He wasn't that person anymore and he wasn't alone anymore either.

"You had a video camera as a kid?! I was desperate for one, but we couldn't afford it." Donna didn't elaborate. They both knew exactly why her family had been unable to afford many things when she'd been a child.

"It was one of my dad's spontaneous purchases when he was away one summer. I don't think my mom was too impressed with the expense, but he'd argued how it would be a way to capture special events, especially when he was going to miss some of them by being on the road."

"He was right."

Harvey smiled and let out a shaky breath, his eyes still wet with tears. "I'd forgotten all about it...I wonder when Marcus last watched these."

"Well, you'll have to take them to Boston at New Years."

Harvey nodded. "That's a good idea. He may have seen them more recently than me, but watching them with him feels right."

Leaning back on the couch, he wiped his eyes and Donna wordlessly moved in to his arms, drawing the throw from the back of the couch across them. The quiet of the apartment brought a sense of calm to an emotional night. Although he still missed his parents deeply, Harvey found himself feeling closer to them that night, remembering childhood times that he'd not thought about in years. It had been the perfect gift, just as his mother had hoped it would be. After a few minutes of quiet, Donna lifted her head from his chest to look at him.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah, Donna. I'm okay. It may sound crazy, but it's almost as if they're here."

"It's not crazy Harvey. It's why our memories are special. They keep those we love with us."

She kissed him gently, stroking his cheek. "And do you know something else?"

"What Donna?"

"I can't wait to make more memories with you."

Her voice caught as she spoke and Harvey tightened his hold of her, still sometimes caught off guard by the fact that they really were together.

No more running away.

She was his wife and there wouldn't be a moment when he wouldn't love her and more importantly, wouldn't fail to show her.

"God, I love you Donna." His voice was filled with all the love and awe he had in his heart for her and it was met with her biggest smile.

"I love you too," she whispered, kissing him softly, before glancing to the clock. It was getting late and knowing how busy the following day would be, she let out a yawn, causing Harvey to chuckle. "Bed time?"

She laughed lightly. "Well, you can stay up all night if you think you'll still be able to handle an excitable Louis with a six month-old, as well as countering all of Mike and Robert's jokes."

"Good point."

With that, they stood up and Donna held out her hand to her husband, whose intertwined their fingers, as they headed to bed, ready to share their first Christmas Day together and create moments that one day they could add to their own family's box of memories.

...

Well, that's all this Christmas Eve. It's only a short story, but I hope you like it and I'm glad I finally finished it. Thanks to all those who've continued to encourage me to write again and I am determined that they'll be more from me sooner rather than later. Do let me know what you think and Merry Christmas / Happy Holidays! :)