I'm so sorry if there are any mistakes or stuff feels rushed, it's just that I have been sitting on this for so long that I'm getting to the point where I hate looking at it and can't edit a second time without it feeling like a burden. I'll come back to it later (as I've done for the previous chapters) and fix up whatever needs to be fixed up. But for now I think it's been long enough since you guys have waited for a chapter.
Hidan told her all about the ritual to join, the risks and about his own journey to getting accepted by Jashin. The things he had done to get where he was now. It was a bit terrifying. Yet she was ready to follow through all of it to receive the gift of Jashin herself. Scanning Hidan was one thing, being able to experience it was another. Maybe then she'll understand the mechanics of his immortality better and will be able to replicate the details. After all, the best subject was always one's self.
Jashinism revolved around sacrifices, though. It was the one huge drawback she saw. But back when she started her little hobby, she knew that she would have to make sacrifices. And she was completely fine with that. It was too late to back out now only because of such one detail.
The reason she hadn't found much online about Jashinism was because it was a dead religion and Hidan himself had dug it up from a dusty ancient temple, experimenting around with the techniques left there in hopes for something.
Few lived past the initial ritual simply by not being worthy. To be worthy, one needed to have blood on their hands. There were no rules of how much, just that it was necessary. Hidan himself had slaughtered all of his neighbours just to meet the first rule. A lot of trial and error had gone into it until he had deciphered the old scrolls correctly.
"I was afraid to do it at first too." he'd told her. "But Jashin doesn't accept such doubts. You need to think of death as something calming, something that'll set you free. It helped to be less afraid."
She was very doubtful. Even if she met the first rule by simply doing her experiments, she didn't quite meet the second one of doing it all for bloodshed and despair.
"Jashin is cruel, but he rewards his followers well."
The rewards were enticing, indeed.
The second rule was to never have doubts in Jashin. Her killing the closest person to her proved her devotion in Jashin and killing herself proved her trust in him. After all that, if Jashin accepted her, she'd be forever stipulated to bringing blood to Jashin lest she wanted to lose the gift and die.
"You'll have to do the long and painful rituals for a while. It's a rite of passage to weed out the fanatics that were only after the immortality. After that the pain will subside, Jashin will replace it with pleasure and killing in your preferred way will work too."
That was less appealing and more of a hassle, but she understood.
"I have faith in you, Sakura."
Ultimately, that was the key—faith.
For years her life had been a crazy roller coaster of risks, but all of them had been calculated, based on facts. Here she had to trust an ethereal entity to grant her what she wanted. It was out of her control and it terrified her. Ever since Hidan had come into her life that seemed to be the norm and the implication of giving away her last thread of control over her life was absolutely mortifying. Was this going to be worth it? Is she ready to sacrifice her life for her mission? The key to the immortality might not even be what she needed. But that was the risk, wasn't it? The risk of any experiment she did that it all might be a waste of her time. It never had come with a threat to her life, though.
Hidan was the only successful example that had lived for years. No one else who had tried had passed or if they did, they couldn't handle the rituals. One had to be completely off their rocker to survive this. She both respected and ridiculed Hidan. After all, to go through all of that for years, they truly had to be missing a few screws.
She wasn't sure if she was crazy enough just yet. In the past few months she'd known Hidan she had pushed her boundaries and discovered new experiences, new ideas. It was a lot of novel things. It was a lot to take in.
It took her some time to compose herself, come down to a decision. The initial sacrifice was something that she didn't want to do. She didn't have a lot of people close to her. Her parents weren't in the picture, she lost most of her friends when she made the shift in her life and the current friends she had weren't that close to her. Except for one.
Ino had been a constant presence in her life for years. Her relationship with Ino suffered a bit since she took up her darker side job, but the closeness never disappeared. To do the ritual successfully, she'll have to kill Ino.
With their plans laid out, Sakura accepted Ino's always there invitation for a double date. Ino had been ecstatic and endlessly questioned her about where she'd gotten a boyfriend, how did they meet, and so on. She spent most of her evening chattering on the phone with the blonde lying through her teeth. Sakura didn't have concrete answers to most of her questions, mostly because she didn't know the answers herself. She wasn't sure what she would label her relationship with Hidan as they never discussed it. But for the sake of getting Ino on the same page she went along with Ino's assumptions with Hidan as the said boyfriend.
After their first night out killing and then sex at her house, Hidan visited her more often. She even once got him to find a subject for her, since she was constantly too busy with her friends and job. With a syringe of her sedative and instructions how to administer it, but of course he didn't listen to her and boinked the victim over the head with a fucking log of all things. Seriously, his recklessness was something to be fixed and improved on. Her subject was needlessly injured and suffered from a mild concussion. But beggars couldn't be choosers.
Hidan had even been curious enough to assist her in her experiments, and he surprised her by actually being a great help. It was almost like having an assistant in the OR. While his chakra wasn't as stable as hers, having extra hands paid off immensely. The only drawback was that he talked. All. The. Fucking. Time. She preferred silence or mild classical music as background noise while she worked. Threatening to use her surgical instruments on him didn't phase him at all, in fact it seemed like he just got more excited by the prospect and kissing him to shut him up for a moment only made him get more handsy.
Honestly, if he wasn't such a help, she would have locked him out of her lab in the first ten minutes. Eventually she did find entertainment in his tales and she started adding her own opinions in to his rambling. Sometimes she found that she'd stopped working altogether and had lost time by talking with him about something random. He held some interesting opinions and information, and sometimes her curiosity got the best of her and she had to seek clarification.
It was different from how it was with Ino. While she sometimes discussed the same life topics with her as well, usually conversations revolved around gossip, relationships be it either romantic or not. Still, she found her and Hidan's relationship interesting. She had never discussed it with him, what they were or what he wanted from her, but it worked. And she couldn't lie that his more reckless and easy going attitude offset her more uptight and by the schedule nature in a way that pushed her to be more easy on herself and stop and smell the roses if just for a few seconds.
In return, she was sure that some of her habits had rubbed off on him. He planned more, even if it was what he was going to have for dinner, and she noticed him being just a bit more cautious about where he does his rituals. It warmed her heart to know that by just being herself she had improved some of his worse off qualities.
She knew what her type in men was and Hidan was far from it, so it surprised her she liked him and kind of enjoyed his company, even if he did make her question her sanity at points.
xxx
This time Sakura chose a spot where they would spend their date night. Knowing Ino, she'd pick something ridiculous again, and she'd have to spend a lot of money. Her spending habits were a bit more stingy compared to Ino, despite their similar salaries. A bowling alley seemed like a reasonable compromise.
She met up with Hidan beforehand to go over their plan for the night again, and just so they could arrive together. The plan was simple enough, Hidan will distract Ino's boyfriend while she took her somewhere secluded and did the ritual. She'd memorized all the words and such.
Sakura had stuck to her recent theme for dates and dressed more or less casually. When Hidan had seen her over-sized t-shirt, he had snorted. In all fairness, it was a ridiculous shirt she'd gotten from Naruto back in college days that read "I shaved my balls for this". She paired that off with a simple red skater skirt and some vans. Yeah, maybe it wasn't appropriate for what was supposed to be a date and Hidan was a bad influence on her, but hey she got a laugh from him.
Hidan hadn't even bothered to dress any differently from his usual get up of jeans and jacket.
Surprisingly enough, when they arrived at the bowling alley, Ino and her boyfriend were already there, waiting for them. She would recognize the huge mass of blonde hair anywhere. It was slightly chilly outside, and the two were standing close to each other, discussing something.
Sakura approached them with a smile, ready to hug Ino. She froze once she got close enough, and Ino moved to finally show the face of her boyfriend. Ino had a huge smile on her face and she was saying something. Her heartbeat was too loud, her eyes stuck to the blond man. It was the same guy, the one she'd tried to attack, the one that had snuffed her out almost immediately in return.
Ino hugged her, and she stiffly returned it, not taking her eyes off the blond man and his easy smile. The ground fell from under her feet completely when Hidan walked up to the guy and greeted him like an old friend, all smiles and handclasps. Was this some kind of a joke? Was she being filmed for a prank show? What the fuck was going on?
"I'm so glad we are finally able to do this." Ino pulled away with a smile, hands on her shoulders. "By the way, Sakura, this is my boyfriend Deidara. Deidara—Sakura."
Sakura stared at him, unable to hide her horror. Deidara for his part seemed amused. Hidan was confused and alternated between throwing glances at her and Deidara.
Ino turned from her to Deidara. "I see you reacquainted yourselves with each other."
"Sure did." The little smile on Deidara's face unsettled her. The visual similarities he had with Ino were even more unsettling. Both had long blond hair tied back in a ponytail, both had blue eyes and both had relatively soft features with a sharp nose and high cheekbones. Did she groom this guy or was it just a coincidence?
"Oh jeez, I'm so excited to finally do this." Ino easily slid in Deidara's arms just as he put a hand around her waist.
She met Hidan's eyes, and he shrugged, clearly just as confused as her. They were going to need to talk. She flattened her lips, trying to send the message visually over to him. In defeat, he just nodded back, and they followed the blonde duo inside the building.
This might change their original plan. Sakura watched Ino's back, the way her long skirt swished when she walked, the bounce in her ponytail and Deidara's secure arm around her waist. It unsettled her. Ino had been dating a possible murderer this whole time.
Hidan stayed by her side, hands in his pockets. "How are we going to do this?" he whispered.
Sakura clenched her teeth, refraining from shouting her frustration. "We'll figure it out. For now, stick to the original plan."
How had she never had the mind to ask Ino how her boyfriend actually looked or what his fucking name was? She'd been so immersed in her own life and her woes that she had never asked too much about others. Funny thing was that Ino talked about him all the time. She might have even mentioned him by name, and she'd just been too out of it to really register it. Biggest surprise was that Hidan knew him, and the bastard had said that he didn't know anything about there being another person like them in the city.
They split the cost of an hour of playtime between them, changed their shoes and entered their names in the system.
Deidara knew about her, and most probably about Hidan as well. Her mind boiled just thinking about the fact that Hidan might have been the one to spill the beans to the blond and then pretended later not to know anything. She hoped that he hadn't lied. He had been just as surprised to see Deidara here as her, but anyone could fake surprise.
With a bright smile, Ino started off the game, picking up a ball and walking near the line of their chosen lane.
Sakura bit down her animosity. It was best not to jump to conclusions prematurely. She needed a clear head for this. It was dim where she was sitting, all the light concentrated on the bowling lines. Soft music played in the background, and she concentrated on that, trying to calm her nerves.
Hidan was small talking with Deidara. From what she could gather, they were catching up. There was a certain snark to both their words, and it seemed like neither man was happy to see each other. Deidara though was amused and slipped off to go through his turn.
"I'm going to buy some drinks, you guys want anything?" Ino asked with a bright smile.
Sakura nodded. "Mojito."
"Same as her." Hidan didn't bother to even look at Ino, too busy glaring at Deidara's back.
Ino paid no attention to his odd behaviour, nodding in confirmation and walking off to the bar.
Deidara was too busy choosing the right weight ball for himself.
They were finally alone.
Sakura pulled Hidan down to sit on the cushioned corner bench. "How the hell do you know Deidara?" Admittedly her anger still seeped through.
Hidan pulled his arm from her vice like grip. "Ex co-workers. We used to be a part of the same organization."
"Did you know he was in the city?"
He shook his head. "No. We're not exactly the best of friends, though we have agreed not to try to kill each other."
The questions were just piling up in her mind. And she nearly kicked herself for not asking the most obvious one. "How do you know Ino? She said that she'd met you before she'd set us up on a date."
Hidan sighed, slumping deeper in the bench. "Well, yeah she did. It was my first time meetin' her, actually. She just randomly came up to me in a cafe and started talkin' bout how she knows one of my friends. It went on from there. She talked a lot."
"She does that."
"She showed me your picture and suggested that I should take you out for a date. I accepted."
Sakura balked. "Just like that?"
"Don't judge me and my methods. If someone brings me a sacrifice like that on a silver platter I 'ain't gonna question it."
She grimaced, eyeing Deidara briefly who had knocked his choice down to between a purple and an orange ball. "It just feels so sleazy. I can't believe Ino would do this."
"Well, s'pose you don't know your friend as good as you thought."
"I suppose so." More questions formed in her mind, but Ino returned with the drinks and snacks placing them on the small table before her and Deidara finally made his roll. She took a sip from her drink before she went to take her turn.
The game carried on like this - they took turns, chatting in between about menial everyday stuff. Ino was happy and probably purposefully blind to the tension that was between the rest of them.
During a break between games Ino snuggled closer to her, her drink in hand. Deidara had left for a smoke break and Hidan was setting up the next game. He had been insistent on changing the order they went to the lane, saying that he lost to Ino only because he was last on the list.
"I can't believe you didn't tell me." Ino took a chip from the chip basket, crunching it loudly.
Sakura chuckled nervously. "I wanted it to be a surprise."
Ino grinned. "But really, Forehead, I'm glad it worked out. You look better, got that sparkle in your eye and colour in your cheeks."
She smiled flatly. She was better, but she wasn't flustered over Hidan (maybe a little, watching him move made her mind wander) it was because of her plans and how she was so close to executing them. It was nerves through and through.
Ino sighed wistfully, eyes drifting to Deidara who was returning from his break.
"I see you're living out all of your teenage dreams." Sakura hid her smile behind her glass, taking a generous gulp from her mojito.
She laughed. "Yeah."
"Well, as long as you don't ask me to have a joint wedding." That had been one of their weird fantasies as well. They might have been twelve when they thought of that.
Ino laughed even lauder. "Oh gods, those were the times."
"Yeah."
Hidan returned, swiftly took the drink from her hand and took a sip. She didn't even get to protest before he returned the glass to her hand. "You go first, love."
She sighed and put down her empty glass just as Deidara joined Ino on the couch, taking her spot. "Yeah, sure." She chose her ball on the way.
Hidan followed her, staying real close. He leaned even closer, whispering in her ear. "You still want to go through with this?"
Sakura smiled sweetly and walked out of his space. "Yes."
"Alright."
"I still have a lot of things to ask, though." It was insane how many questions had been brought up and with that the realization that she barely knew Hidan at all. They'd been so busy with her experiments and Jashinism that she hadn't thought to ask him about his life beyond that at all. It hadn't even passed her mind that it might be relevant.
Ino won the game again with Hidan at a close second. Those two competed the whole game while she and Deidara watched from the sidelines with amusement. Surprisingly enough she got along with Deidara. He didn't bring up her little secret at all, instead while Hidan and Ino were bickering they talked about random stuff and how competitive their other halves were. She almost forgot who he was.
After Ino calmed down from her winning high, she suggested they close off the date with dinner. It was the perfect intervention to execute her plan.
On the way the blonde was too busy talking sweet nothings with Deidara to really pay attention to her. So she huddled next to Hidan. "About that co-workers thing. What kind of organization was it?"
Hidan was quiet for a while, it seemed like he would not answer at all. It was obvious he didn't enjoy talking about it, yet she needed to know. "It wasn't anythin' official, wasn't legal more like. We were labelled as terrorists."
Sakura stayed quiet, despite more questions bubbling up.
"Mostly did assassinations and some espionage missions. The Leader was a whacko with a God complex, the rest of us more or less hated each other. I got outta that fuckery as fast as I could."
She bit her lip, contemplating. Their history was a lot more complex than she thought. It explained why Deidara knew about her off the bat—he had worked amongst fucked up people like that. "Is Deidara going to be a problem?"
"I don't think so. He's here just to fuck with me, anyway."
She turned to him, eyes wide. "Why would you think that?"
"Revenge. We never exactly saw eye to eye."
Just at that moment Deidara looked back at them, a mischievous smile on his lips. She didn't like it. He didn't look like he was entirely stable. She couldn't figure out if he was onto them or he really was, as Hidan suggested, fucking with them for the shits and giggles.
"I don't know what he was trying to pull by sickin' his girlfriend on me."
"You think Deidara planned this?"
"Naw. He's too dumb for that, probably just saw me in the city and wanted to annoy me with his irritating girlfriend."
"That doesn't make any sense." She lightly smacked his shoulder. "And Ino isn't stupid. She's well meaning, supportive and an excellent friend."
He grinned. "Yet you still wanna kill her for a selfish cause."
"It's not- ugh." She cut herself off. "You're a terrible influence on me."
"The baddest." He kissed her temple. "You wanna wait after dinner or do this now?"
"Do you know how you're gonna get Deidara out of the way?"
"I can think up a couple of ways."
She cast a glance across their surroundings. They were in a fairly populated area. It was still early in the evening and people were perusing the streets despite the small drizzle of rain. It wasn't far off from the restaurant. She'll have to come up with something to get Ino's attention. Shit, shit. She'll have to act again.
Her hand rested on the butterfly knife in her jacket's pocket, the cool metal grounding her. "We do this now," she whispered and unlatched herself from his hold.
She pretended to be distressed while searching through her purse as she walked next to Ino. "Crap. I think I'm out of tampons."
That caught the other woman's attention, and she unlatched from Deidara briefly. "What?"
"I'm so sorry." She smiled sweetly to Deidara and turned to Ino with desperation in her eyes. "My period started, I think I'm leaking already and I don't have any tampons with me." She bet everything on Ino always being prepared, especially for an occasion that was as important to her as this.
"Oh god. Okay, lemme check." The blonde started rummaging through her purse.
She spared a glance towards Hidan, who was smiling with hands in his pockets, observing the scene with patient calm.
"Found one." And to prove it, she pulled it out. Before giving it to her, she scanned their surroundings. They were in a busy district, plenty of shops around. Her eyes landed on a coffee shop.
Ino turned to Deidara, who by all means looked a bit unsettled. "We'll be right back." She smiled at Sakura. "Let's go."
Sakura returned the smile. "Thank you so much, Pig. I don't know what I would do without you."
"Psh, you'd probably bleed all through that ratty-ass skirt."
She laughed good-naturedly. Before leaving, she shared a look with Hidan, who slightly nodded to her in response. Her heart thudded in her chest as Ino lead her across the street and into the coffee shop. Sakura didn't have to talk at all, Ino found the bathroom for them, which was blissfully empty.
"Your period has the worst timing ever, Forehead. I hope you're not getting cramps too."
Sakura smiled as she headed into a stall. "I'm fine, though I'm sorry that I had to ruin our date like this."
Ino sighed, rummaging through her purse noisily. "It's alright, you can't control your period. I'm just happy that you agreed to come at all."
She pretended to rummage with her pants and the tampon. "You have been pestering me about it for months, so..."
Ino sighed. "I know and I'm sorry. I saw how absent you were getting from us, avoiding all of our gatherings. The dates were just the first thing that seemed something different." Ino paused, the rattling of her purse stopping. "I want you to be happy, Sakura. You changed very drastically in the past few years. The you of three years ago would have been ecstatic about the date idea. I just want that Sakura back."
Sakura stilled. She didn't know if it was fear or guilt that clenched her heart. Of course she had changed, she took her life in a different direction. It wasn't like it had been a spur of the moment decision either. Ever since her last break up and the start of her career as a doctor, she decided to make a change in the world. She abandoned her past self and reinvented herself as a goal orientated woman with something to achieve. She didn't like who she had been in the past—someone led by emotion and frivolous things. "I'm still me. I just grew up."
She chuckled, clinking something loudly against the sink. "No kidding. You like skipped your twenties and thirties and jumped straight into forty-year-old busy mom phase."
"Hey!"
"Kidding, I'm kidding. I'm glad that you decided to be less…" the pause elongated and Sakura was afraid to hear what she was going to say. "Touchy? No, I'd say sensitive. Which is a good thing because your crying about Sasuke got old real fast."
"Hey!"
Ino laughed. "Yeah, I'm glad we're past that."
With a mock frown, Sakura exited the stall. "Don't act like you're any better. I lost sleep over listening to you moan about how much of an ass Sai is."
Ino was smirking, arms crossed. "Let's just agree that we were both equally bad."
"Sure."
She was going to miss this, this easy conversation, the memories. There was no one else in the world like Ino. But today she was going to be a stepping stone towards her advancement, she was going to be a part of something bigger and once she made it big, she won't forget Ino and her sacrifice.
Her hand made it back to the knife in her pocket. "Let's go back before the guys start wondering what's taking us so long."
"Yeah."
It would arouse unneeded suspicion to do anything while inside. Her hands shook from the anticipation, her sight zeroing in on Ino, surroundings blurring into a blob. Sakura followed Ino out of the cafe just a step behind her, watching her back, her long ponytail swish as she walked.
"Where the hell did they go?" Ino stopped, hands on her sides, observing the street.
Sakura smiled to herself. Hidan had done his part. She didn't say a word, mind clear, and followed Ino down the street, and kept her eye on any spots where she could drag Ino into.
Ino was speaking, voicing her displeasure if her scowl was any sign.
Her heart was beating so hard in her chest, hands clammy. The street was too crowded, too urban for there to really be a darker spot where she could execute the ritual in peace.
Ino was walking with a quick stride, phone in hand, avoiding running into people like a pro.
Uh oh. Distraction, quick. "Wait! I think I see them."
She swivelled on her heel. "Where?"
Sakura latched on to her hand and dragged her in a different direction, down a less travelled street that led to a particular slum that would be perfect for her needs.
"I swear when I'll find him I'll rip him a new one." Ino was ranting to herself, thankfully phone out of her hand.
They walked down the side-walk, Ino's heels clacking loudly in the much quieter district.
"Are they fucking running from us or something? What the hell! Lemme just call Deidara."
Shit. They still were some way away from the slum and the street was too well lit with too many people around. Sakura panicked and smacked the phone out of Ino's hand.
"What the fuck, Sakura! You could've-hey!"
Sakura pulled on her hand, dragging her further along.
"What's up with you? What the hell is going on?" One question after another fell from her lips.
She tuned her out, focusing on navigating the street. They were almost there.
Ino suddenly yanked her hand free, irritated. "Will you tell me what the holy hell is going on already?"
Sakura licked her dry lips, searching for an excuse. There really wasn't anything plausible coming to mind, her thoughts too scrambled.
Ino was a tick away from impatiently tapping her foot on the ground like an angry parent. Which was bad, very, very bad.
She quickly scanned her surroundings. The street was dim, only one person was on the side-walk behind them and the slum was just across the street. Ino was waiting for an explanation, arms crossed and brows drawn in a displeased frown. Sakura acted fast, taking a gamble, and slammed her hand over Ino's mouth, muffling the squeak of surprise. She took Ino by the waist and dragged her across the street, watching both sides of the road for any witnesses. Ino was struggling and screeching, but her grip was stronger.
Sakura slammed open the flimsy door of the slum with her foot and dragged Ino inside the darkness. It reeked of something stale and rotten, but she pushed the extra sensations out of her mind. She stayed close enough to the doorway for the dim streetlights to shine in some light. She let go of Ino, pushing her, and the blonde fell on the ground with a shriek. Sakura pulled out her knife, recounting the words Hidan had taught her to say during the ritual.
Ino scrambled back to her feet. "What the hell are you doing?" Her eyes were wide, lip trembling. Periodically she kept glancing at the doorway behind Sakura. It was the only visible exit.
"I'm sorry, Ino, but you'll have to die for me, for science."
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Ino took involuntary steps back, continuing to search for an exit.
Sakura licked her dry lips, the metal of the knife cold in her hand. With no warning she jumped Ino, aiming her knife towards where she thought Ino's heart would be. "For Lord Jashin." She struck and Ino screamed, flailing her hands. Her knife grazed Ino's ribs instead. It was too dark and her shadow was shrouding Ino.
Blocking out any sounds Ino made, she tackled the blonde. This was just another subject, just another stepping stone towards her advancement, towards science.
Ino was sobbing, her cheeks wet. The light from the doorway hit her face just right, illuminating the fear, confusion and...betrayal on her face. Sakura tried not to think about it and how much the last one hurt. This was just a subject, no one else.
"Why? Why do this?" Her words were choked.
Sakura kept her face and voice blank, straddling her hands to her sides. "For Lord Jashin." and struck Ino again, this time hitting her goal. She recited the necessary words, starting the ritual.
Ino had ceased to struggle, her whimpers dying out.
She hurried forward, not giving herself time to second guess things, and stabbed herself in the heart. The words fell from her lips. At first she nothing happened until the pain hit her like a freight train. She gasped, barely holding her balance. White, searing pain erupted from her chest and she coughed blood. It pooled in her mouth. She punctured her lung with the stab. Black spots flew across her vision. Everything sounded like it was underwater.
Ino's glassy eyes stared back at her, judging.
She swayed, losing her balance, almost falling onto Ino. Someone caught her by her shoulders before that and helped her back to her feet.
"Sakura? Love, you there?"
A blurry outline of someone swam before her. She coughed. "I'm dying."
"Yes, it feels like that. But you're not dead yet. It's a good sign." The blur pulled the knife from her chest.
She squeaked weakly in protest, her eyelids heavy. Was this worth it? She killed her best friend and herself for the possibility of bettering her experiments. What was she thinking? If she died, her research died with her.
Someone swiped the sweaty hair from her face with a gentle touch. "It's gonna be a'right. You got this, Sakura."
Everything was spinning, her body numb. "Hidan..." She blinked, trying to clear her vision, and gripped his arms with a slippery, weak grasp. "I can't feel anything."
"Relax, everythin' is gonna be okay now." His voice sounded like it came from a different room—distant and muffled.
Her head lulled and her vision darkened. All thoughts left her.
xxx
She came to what felt like a moment later, groggy. It wasn't as dark anymore; the lighting dim. No more nasty smells or coldness.
Groaning she sat up, cradling her heavy head. She was sticky and the taste of iron prevailed in her mouth.
The room she was in was familiar, yet she couldn't place where she'd seen it before. It was dark outside and a small desk lamp beside the couch illuminated the spacious room.
Her head was spinning, and she was slightly sick to her stomach. She touched her chest, where she remembered she plunged the knife. It was sticky and stained dark brown, but didn't hurt.
"Here." A glass of water made into her field of view.
She looked up, her vision swimming momentarily from the swift action. Hidan looked the same apart from a few dark stains on his t-shirt and smears of blood across his jaw. It was a grisly sight. Was the blood hers? Or was it Deidara's? She blinked blearily before she accepted the glass.
Hidan sat on the coffee table across from her, hands resting on his knees.
She took a sip of the cool water. It was a welcome change from the nasty dryness in her mouth.
"How you feelin'?"
Nothing hurt, her dizziness was quickly clearing up. And apart from being covered in her own blood, there were no visible injuries on her skin, none that she could feel at least. Surprisingly enough even the pain in her hand that had plaguing her for years no matter how many times she healed it was gone. "Alright." She took another sip. "How long was I out?"
"Half an hour." He grinned. "Congratulations, Sakura, you're now a follower of Jashin. You got past the initiation."
Sakura licked her dry lips and swallowed thickly, staring into her half empty glass. She made it; she did the nearly impossible and got herself immortality. The victory felt hollow, yet amazing. It was the beginning of something new. She took another sip of the water. "What happened to Deidara? Did you kill him?"
Hidan scoffed. "Ha! I wish. We can't kill each other." He raised his hand, showing her the ring on his index finger. "This little thing is a contract that binds us to an oath to not hurt the members of the organization. It's possible if you like the consequences, but I don't exactly fancy feelin' excruciating pain all the time."
"Why I thought that being a Jashinist was all about pain?"
"Jashin rewards us afterwards for the pain. This shit over here ain't worth it. Anyway, I sent the blonde ponce on his way. Made a mighty fuss, but there's nothing he can do 'bout it now."
She ticked her nail against the glass with a rhythmical tink, her eyes on the signet ring. She didn't want to ask about Ino; she was better off not knowing. Chances were that her disappearance was going to get reported and cops were going to show up on her doorstep within the week. She wasn't looking forward to lying through that. Thinking about Ino hurt way more than she expected, and she pushed the feelings from her mind.
Hidan took one of her hands in his own, and the action pleasantly surprised her. "You're not thinking about backing out?"
"A bit too late for that, don't you think?"
"Well, you never know." He looked to the side, grimacing.
Sakura sighed, smiling. "I'm not going to leave you, Hidan. I'm in this too deep. And I wanna see it through."
He snorted, covering his face with his hand. "Fuck, I'm so stupid."
"Well...I can't dispute that."
Hidan mock frowned. "Fuck you."
"Only if you ask nicely."
They both burst into laughter at the same time.
She put her water glass down on the floor and pulled Hidan closer to her by his hand. He complied and settled next to her on the couch. "All this talk about organizations and Jashinism are giving me ideas."
"Do tell." He put his hand around her and twirled a strand of her messy hair around his finger.
Sakura frowned, looking down at her stained hands and shirt. She really needed a shower and a change of clothes. She was itching to go back to her lab and experiment again. She wanted to do something, anything. With her newfound power, maybe she could go even further than a backdoor quack operation. "How about we start our own organization?"
"What?"
"Y'know, to spread the message of Jashin, get more people on our side. I want to expand my horizons, I need more willing subjects to experiment on." She paused, smiling at him coyly. "Unless you want to be my test subject."
Hidan stared at her for a long while, expression unreadable. Then he leaned in and surprised her with a kiss, cradling her face. "Fuck, I think I love you."
Sakura laughed and pecked him gently back. "Is that a yes, Hidan?"
"It's a fuck yes."
Ultimately my challenge with this story was trying to make both Sakura and Hidan equals. It's fairly difficult to do when the main theme is corruption. I'm still not entirely sure I managed it and that all of my attempts of trying to give Sakura some power might have the unfortunate implications of it just being Hidan's influence. Well, it is what it is and I still think that this story is a nice contrast to the stories where Sakura tames the bad guy like a disobiedent pet. It was especially fun exploring Sakura's character, imagining what she would be like if she'd gotten a different kind of obsession.
Anyway, thank you for coming with me on this journey through something darker. I know stories like this aren't everyone's cup of tea, so I'm glad for the few of you who gave this story a chance and read all through it. Thank you so much.
Also, if you're hungry for more HidaSaku, you can expect more from me during Valentines. And this time it's going to be set in canon.