Ash was setting the ship up for a hyperspace jump, they had a long way to go to deliver their cargo so best settle in for a long night. She couldn't think straight at the moment, she hadn't seen Gacen in a couple hours which could be very bad, she wanted to go find him but knew she had to not smother him that would just make it worse.
As if in response to her worry she heard him enter the cockpit. "hey Ash you got the route setup" he said as he plopped down into the co-pilots chair feet up on the controls
"Yeah I've got the route plotted and we're ready to go into hyperspace" she was rather new to piloting but thought she'd been picking it up fairly fast with Gacen's help
"I should probably check just in case don't wanna end up inside a giant space worm or something" he said with a slight chuckle, he leaned over the console catching himself on about 10 buttons "don't worry about that it's probably unimportant" Ash made a mental note of which buttons to reset once he had finished. "pretty good but look here" he pointed at a point in the route near a black hole "this is a bit too close to the black hole it's probably best not to risk it"
Ash was surprised "but I've calculated the risk and it's small enough that making that journey will be worth it to get us there sooner" made sense to her they would get paid more even if there was damage
"yeah i know but better safe than sorry right, also if we add" he pointed to another star "this we can pick up lunch at a place that actually serves good food rather than bug food" he made a good point usually food at the drop offs was quite unenjoyable
"alright sure why not" Ash said probably best not to press it
"excellent" he said moving back to his reclined position, he slipped for a second and nearly fell over "I'm fine i'm fine don't worry" he said scrambling back into his seat
"I wasn't worried" Ash said with her arms folded she swore he'd lose his head without her "so you doing okay?" she asked probably best to at least ask
"what do you mean" Gacen said with a puzzled look on his face
hmmm she didn't want to be too obvious "you been stable" she said with an eyebrow raised
"oh cmon Ash trust me i'm fine you'd know if there was a problem trust me" exactly that's why she was worried but he was right she should trust him
"okay good i'm gonna bump this into hyperspace we got a while in there so make sure you don't get too bored" she said hopefully implying the right thing
"yeah i'm gonna take a nap easiest way to combat boredom" he said with a smile he walked out the cabin with his usual chipper walk which was a good sign.
Ash stayed at the console for a bit making sure that every precaution was taken before leaving it to make the trip, she had an alert for if they came out of hyperspace, a remote pilot, the list went on. She had tried to install some upgrades to the ship after agreeing to join Gacens crew, the ship was royally unequipped and could fall apart any minute, now it could probably manage the Kessel run, Gacen said that was some kind of hard maneuver or something. Speaking of Gacen a nap didn't seem like the worst idea and it would be good to check on him.
Ash got up and made her way to the bunks but when she arrived there was no sign of Gacen oh no this was bad she began to look for him checking for alcohol as she went there was none last time she checked, she made sure of it. None in the kitchen area but his hiding spots were more of the issue, None in the chess table good, none in the holopad and none in the medbay hidden as medicine. This meant he either already had it and he had a lot or Ash was overreacting.
Where was he though? she'd normally found him by now, she searched the ship one more time and still couldn't find him in any room, the only place he could still be is in the turret. She made her way to the bottom of the turret "Gacen? you up there" She could see his feet but still polite to ask
"huh wha– oh hey Ash what's up" Gacen seemed disorientated which was a very bad sign
"what are you doing up there i thought you were having a nap?" god this was going so wrong he better not be drinking himself to death up there
"nap? oh well… i like to nap up here sometimes ya know the hyperspace trails they're cool n stuff" that's a suprisingly good lie but his stupor and dazy way of speaking was giving it away big time
She would have to trick him down "well i'm going to take a nap so need someone up front" obligation seemed a good road to take
"oh well… sure i can do that i guess give me a minute to come down you just go ahead and go to bed" yeah sure and leave you like that fat chance at least he wasn't slurring his words
Ash had to keep this charade up so went to the bunks but stayed awake. She heard a loud crash about 2 minutes later and made her way to the bar area fists clenched. Gacen was sat there on the floor drinking from a flask "uh A—Ash um this uh where did this flask come from" he said barely comprehensible "i think it's haunted"
"God dammit Gacen why do you keep doing this" Ash was shouting now this was not the first time and she was really trying to help him she was furious
"alright fine okay i can't do it are you happy now you win I'm a drunk and you're in control" Gacen said retreating into himself beginning to drink more from the flask
"this is not what i want Gacen i want to help you why do you want to do this to yourself" she said snatching the flask from Gacens hands
"you know damn well why, everything is garbage, everyone leaves and i'm left alone i can't do it anymore it's too hard" he said trying to stand up but stumbling back to his knees
"so what you'd rather just drink yourself to death" Ash was really trying she had a lot of patience for him because of all he'd done for her but she could not tolerate that
"Maybe, what's the point in not I don't exactly have any family who would miss me" Gacen seemed so lost Ash had no idea what to do she was terrible at talking to people regularly how did she bring her best friend out of this
"how do you know if there's a point if you're never sober hell when was the last time that you were" Ash really hoped that would it through to him
"i don't wanna be sober because then i start thinking and when i start thinking i can't stop and feel just as bad" Ash knew he'd been through a lot but he still hadn't told him half of the story how was she supposed to help if he wouldn't open up
"please tell me when was the last time that you were sober" she needed to know how long she had been lied to
"a little after we got out of Belsavis, what do you care anyway?" WHAT a little after Belsavis the whole time they'd been working together she was utterly furious she wanted to slap him so bad but contained herself
"of course i fucking care Gacen i'm not angry at you for no reason i'm angry because you're my friend and i want my friend back the one who could bring me out of a bad mood with his stupid jokes and show me right from wrong when i was too stubborn to understand. You're not the only one who lost people you're all I've got now but i don't know if i can keep doing this if you're always drinking yourself into a state of unconsciousness" Ash was tearing up at this point she wasn't familiar with this sensation what do people normally do with tears where do they go?
Gacens face changed though maybe it worked "oh i…i just thought you wanted me to be better so i could help" Ash was shocked did he really not realize that she just needed her friend back "you really want me to be better for me?"
"of course i do i know i'm not good at showing it but i really care about you Gacen, please just get better for me?" Ash didn't like admitting these sort of things but this seemed like it was worth it
"Okay Ash i'll try i promise it'll be a slow process and i'm still gonna drink but i won't drink myself to death" Gacen said with a half smile that was a half victory for Ash it's better than nothing and he at least understood now.
"okay thanks buddy i really appreciate it" Ash needed a rest after that she felt so overwhelmed.
"good now i'm gonna take a nap on this nice cold floor i'll see you in the morning" with that his head hit the metal and he passed out
Ash picked him up and moved him too the bed, even as dead weight he was the easiest thing to carry. "good night Gacen you stupid fool" Ash said with a smile and left him…