Kyradia hadn't found anything new when she checked the archives so decided to come up to the balcony for a rest, it wasn't the most calming spot as it's where she'd fought Empress Vaylin to the death and another time she'd lost control but she felt it was good for reflection. She didn't think anything could change her mind, every part of who she was before she became this was gone, she just hurt and hurt people it was crazy to think anything else.
But then something equally crazy happened, she saw someone on the balcony that reminded her of home, she wasn't going to think anything of it until she got close and began to recognise the admittedly much older features of someone from that past. She hadn't seen her brother in 15 years assuming him to be dead after what happened on Dathomir but here he was after all this time and all her feelings came out at once.
She could feel her eyes soaked with tears sobbing into his jacket as he tried to comfort her "hey hey shhhhh it's ok Dee what's wrong" Kyradia didn't respond hugging him tight making sure this was real and not some awful trick by Zash
He seemed real enough and either way she didn't care, she looked up at him his face not as young as it once was and clear age in his eyes "I-I-I did something bad again, I hurt some people, I let it out" Gacen nodded his expression getting very serious, it had been clear Gacen knew about the change but not all the specifics
Gacen hugged her tight rocking her back and forth "oh oh dear Dee I'm so sorry it's ok, it wasn't your fault" Kyradia shook her head she knew he was wrong
Kyradia sighed "you're wrong it was me it's always me it's what I am I thought I could fight it but I'm jus-" Kyradia couldn't finish before Gacen interrupted her
He held his hands against her head "Hey NO! You are not just what they made you don't say that, you're still Kyradia Zandar my little sister I can see it in you and I could back then. You're still the little scamp who pranked the chief because you thought he was an ass, and the flighty weirdo you've always been even now after 15 years I see it in you. Even if a little more grown up" Kyradia just shook her head not believing him
Kyradia sobbed "No you don't understand everything about that person is gone replaced with this monster, the sith only groomed the worst parts you must've seen it I've done horrible things everything about that life is gone and I'm sure I hurt you through it" she could piece together why they hadn't met yet it must be because she was a scary cruel sith Kyradia had become
Gacen shook his head "no no you didn't hurt me at all please don't blame yourself for my mistakes" Gacen was clearly affected by the comment his hands shaking a little
Kyradia took a deep breath and looked at him "then why did you avoid me for 15 years, you knew I wouldn't understand and you were right I'd have been cruel and monstrous even to my own brother because I'm just a horrible weapon" Gacen shook his head clenching his fists clearly not angry at her but the situation
He seemed rather overwhelmed, sighing "that's not why I avoided you, I felt like a failure, I let you get captured and I was scared of what you'd think of me. The more time that passed the more I felt like you deserved to hate me, I failed you again I was all you had and I fucked it all up cause I was weak and stupid" Kyradia let out a shaky breath she realised they both blamed themselves for everything
She shook her head "but Gacen what could you have done you're not a fighter" Gacen looked at her tears streaming down his face
He sighed "it's not about that Kyradia I didn't even try, I'm just a guy who's too scared to take action I always have been it's hurt everyone around me all my life" he rubbed his forehead "but that doesn't matter Dee you're not a monster and I won't let you believe that" Kyradia couldn't believe him
She sighed "but it's just as I said it's all I have left, everything from before except you is gone and well we clearly messed up that part" Gacen nodded squeezing her hand "I… I just we're the last two left, no chief, no friends and no…" she trailed off thinking back on the necklace she'd lost
Gacen sighed "no mum yeah I know, I promise you she'd be proud of you, this Alliance is all yours right you must've defeated that 'Endless Empire' or whatever" Kyradia let out a small smile at Gacen's butchering of the name and clearly only just putting it together what happened?
Kyradia shook her head "Eternal Empire, she never saw me like this I know it's silly but if I had some part of her maybe I could believe what you're saying" she looked away ashamed "but I lost her necklace a long time ago" Gacen frowned at her "I went looking for it once I think someone took it after the attack, I want to believe you're right and that I'm more than what they made me but it's just all that was left after Dathomir, a savage product of the sith it's hard to feel like anything but a monster no matter how hard I try to change" Gacen nodded as he began loosening his scarf
Gacen nodded "I get what you're saying after making so many mistakes you just want some sign of when everything was ok, but I think I've used it for long enough" Gacen reached into his collar and pulled out the Bone Charm necklace and passed it over to Kyradia. Kyradia stood there in shock her breath shaky as she looked at it "I never gave up on you Kyradia no matter how scared I was to see you because of my own fuck ups, I kept this to remind me of my silly little sister" Kyradia took it and held it letting out a overwhelmed gasp as she took it with a smile
Kyradia stammered "y-you kept this all these years?" she put it on and remembered her mother giving it to her, she looked at Gacen with tears flooding her eyes "I'm not a monster am I" Gacen shook his head
He held her hand "of course not you're only a person and people make mistakes, what are you?" he smiled
She took a deep breath "I'm Kyradia the alliance Commander" Gacen shook his head with a smile
Gacen chuckled "little more Rads you're close" Kyradia nodded realising what he meant
She closed her eyes and held the necklace "I'm Kyradia Zandar from Dathomir" as she opened her eyes Gacen pulled her into a hug
Kyradia smiled she didn't know how much she'd needed this "I'm so sorry I took this long to come and see you I was stupid and scared you'd hate me and I'm so so sorry" Kyradia hugged him back as she began to calm down
She patted his back "Bro it's ok I really don't blame you it's not your fault any of this shit happened we both know who's to blame" she could feel Gacen seethe for a second as he let her go
He held the bridge of his nose "yeah I know sorry let's not talk about that we got some catching up to do" Kyradia raised her eyebrows wow there was a lot to catch up on.
She sat down on the bench "tell me your story first since it isn't plastered all over the news" Gacen nodded sitting down next to her, he seemed to go for something in his pocket but then changed his mind
He leaned back "oh shit where to begin I'll give you the abridged version, well after the slavers attacked I was sent to Kessel but quickly I escaped in a ship, crashed into an orbital station and stowed away on a ship" Kyradia shook her head of course that happened her brother had always been a very in the moment thinker "Captain liked my style and needed a helper so I helped out for a few years until the captains luck ran out and I ended up with the ship" Kyradia could see him get a little dejected at that point but decided not to press "then I met a nob who stole my ship, I got it back and met my wife, we started a crime empire with her" Kyradia's eyes widened as Gacen seemed to gloss over it and keep talking
She grabbed his arm "Wait! I have a sister in law?" Gacen looked at her and nodded "uh can I meet her?" Gacen thought about it
He nodded "sure I can get her back on the comms, her name is Risha and she's a Princess, crime lord and mechanic so I'm probably winning spouse bingo" Kyradia rolled her eyes as he boasted
Kyradia did start to get competitive "well my Boyfriend is a space pirate and a good one at that" Gacen nodded clearly not impressed "he's great shut up" Gacen chuckled as he started patch Risha through
He continued "after that I did a few things, made friends with a trooper brought down a crime lord, nearly destroyed Makeb" Kyradia's eyes widened she was on Makeb
Kyradia chuckled "no shit I was on Makeb too" Gacen smiled at her cleary bewildered
He chuckled "huh small world, the only other thing of note is I helped the Basen'thor try to rescue you and failed" Kyradia gasped he was the smuggler! She felt stupid had everyone known he was alive? Well probably not that they were related
Kyradia smiled "well I know that failed but I appreciate you trying that couldn't have been easy" Gacen smiled clearly that meant a lot
Gacen chuckled "it was fucking infuriating I was in the room with you then that brown haired woman caught me I was so close, after that I was in prison, escaped and found my wife, speaking of" Kyradia guessed it was some constellation she'd killed Vaylin, the holo sprung to life.
Kyradia saw as the beautiful form of a human with long brown hair came on the holo, Gacen spoke up "hey Risha first of all how dare you trick me like this I love you but I hate you" there was a long clearly proud laugh from Risha
She smiled "I couldn't help myself and you know it's the push you needed" Gacen pouted but clearly it was part of their flirting "you must be my sister in law I must say clearly beauty runs in the family" Kyradia blushed beyond belief she always did when a woman flirted with her even though she knew it was a joke.
Kyradia smiled "ahah yes well it's nice to see the person willing to tolerate my big brother as his significant other you must have the patience of a saint" Gacen looked offended by the comment and Kyradia chuckled
She was so overwhelmed with emotions but knew she hadn't felt this calm in a while, Gacen shook his head "I'll have you know she loves my shenanigans" Risha shook her head
She chuckled "they have their place but it does take some patience, he's worth it though" Kyradia smiled happy Gacen was happy
Kyradia folded her arms "I do have to ask how did you know to trick him into being here I've been off world for days" Risha chuckled and smiled
She played with her hair "that's uh actually a coincidence Gacen was actually heading there on a job for me" Kyradia frowned hadn't Lana mentioned something about this
Gacen gasped "oh yeah! I forgot maybe Lana has an update on what she can give us" he turned to Kyradia realising he had to explain "oh right my wife's planet is being ruled by a dickhole and we're trying to take it back keep it on the downlow" Kyradia was a little bewildered with information but nodded
She held her chin "will do but I'm fully willing to give my brother and his wife whatever he needs, he may be an idiot but his hearts in the right place" she looked back to Risha "and you seem pretty smart I'll talk to Lana make sure she agrees" Gacen's eyes narrowed as he looked at the holo of his wife
He grumbled "this was your plan the whole time wasn't it" Risha looked a little embarrassed and shook her head
She defended herself "I mean it would've been a nice extra but really I just wanted to do this for you because you're helping me take back my home" Kyradia smiled from the side they were so perfect for each other
She giggled "wow you two are so sweet it hurts" she teased as Gacen frowned at her
Gacen sulked "no we're cool and adventurous" Kyradia nodded clearly making fun, she really had missed her brother and pulled her into another hug
She chuckled "that's your punishment for taking so long I'm gonna tease you relentlessly" Gacen laughed shaking his head and hugging her back, Kyradia didn't know if she would be able to defeat Zash but Gacen was right as she clutched her mother's necklace she knew she was more than the sisters weapon and she'd be damned if she let them win...