A/N: To be honest, in the insanity that is my life, I had forgotten about this story. But then SaturnnFoxx was kind enough to leave a short review! And I ended up pulling open my document and throwing this chapter together in the span of four days! Yay! Hope you enjoy!
Chapter 2: Period of Adjustment
Usagi marched him up the stairs, into the temple, and through the pristine hallways into a private meeting room confidently, as if she lived there. She immediately plopped down onto her knees at the small circular table, pulling Mamoru down with her.
The table was already occupied – four familiar girls, her closest friends all stared at her in various states of shock – eyes darting towards him in wariness. She was aware of their discomfort – but she ignored it completely, instead pouring a cup of tea and passing it to him before she took up a cookie for herself.
He accepted the gift absently, and took a small sip before smiling in contentment. He knew he should be nervous, but her confidence in facing her friends, her senshi, poured into his form, and he let himself feel that, and forced himself to take a deep lungful of air.
"Luna!" Usagi sighed through a mouthful of treats, addressing the black cat that sat next to a white counterpart on a box behind the circular table. "I need your help!"
If the room had been silently tense before, now it had reached all-out panic levels.
Usagi still seemed unfazed, and Mamoru wondered how much of her oblivious ditziness was usually an act.
She glared at him then.
I am not oblivious. Or ditzy!
Really? Because I can think of a few instances from just today.
He couldn't help the smirk that bloomed across his face.
"A-hem," the shrine maiden interrupted their silent conversation. "Usagi-chan," she began tightly. "What is Mamoru-san doing at our study session?"
"It's alright," the ondangoed blonde waved away their concern dismissively. "He knows."
"What do you mean he knows?" Rei spat out. The other girls looked tense, and even the cats – or Mauans, whatever – had risen to their haunches. "Knows what?"
"Usagi-chan! How could you be so irresponsible?" Ami jumped in, her eyes wide with concern.
And he felt internal Usagi's flinch. If Ami, who was normally kind, patient, and at least willing to hear her out, had condemned her outright, Usagi was doomed.
It seemed she was correct, because Makoto and Minako were quick to jump in with questions on what had happened and how, while Rei shook with incoherent rage.
Usagi didn't respond to any of it. He stared at her in concern as her shoulders slumped and she just took the barrage. Sudden spiraling feelings of self-loathing and inadequacy writhed into his stomach like coiled snakes. She wasn't good enough to be a senshi anyway – the confidence that had bolstered him moments ago had vanished, lost down the black hole of her anxiety.
"Stop," he interjected firmly, though without raising his voice. His voice, cut through their verbal assault like an ice javelin just the same.
None of this was your fault. You know that, right?
I was too slow, couldn't get out of the way. If you hadn't tried to rescue me, neither one of us would have been hit.
"It's not her fault!" he barked coldly across the crowded table. "It's hard to keep a secret from someone who can read your mind."
You are a fantastic senshi. My personal favorite.
She peered at him gratefully, a faint blush dusting her cheeks.
The others stared at him in shock!
"What do you mean, you can read her mind?" Makoto demanded, brunette leering threateningly across the table at him.
"How dare you!" Minako accused, rising to her feet threateningly. He leaned back. "Talk about an invasion of privacy!
"How did this even happen?" Ami asked with only slightly more patience.
And now suddenly, Mamoru understood Usagi's fear. These were four very powerful women who all seemed to have come to the conclusion that whatever was going on was entirely his fault. And clearly, as much as they chastised Usagi, they also were insanely protective of her.
"I don't need you to protect me!" Usagi cut in this time. "I…" she glanced at him and reached for his hand, which he took. And only after he did, was he surprised at himself. He wondered if it had been her idea and he hadn't realized. But now that he had her hand, he wasn't going to let it go. "I mean… we…" she corrected the pronoun firmly, "need your help. Something happened at the youma battle last night. And now we are in each other's heads. And guys! I don't like thinking about math all the time!"
The other six stared at the two of them in uncertainty.
Then Rei broke the silence with a burst of undignified giggles. "Perhaps, that would do you some good," she teased.
And with that the tension evaporated, and Mamoru urged himself to relax. He was dimly aware of Usagi doing the same, though she also took the time to pat his captured hand in comfort.
"Rei-chan," the blond began seriously, "would you really want anyone to hear everything even if it made you crazy good at something?"
Rei simply rolled her eyes. Ami pulled out a little blue handheld computer decorated with the symbol for Mercury.
"How was Mamoru even involved with the battle?" Makoto interjected, the suspicion still dripping from her tone.
Usagi peered at him at the question.
What do you want to tell them?
And he jumped, somehow startled, realizing that she wasn't going to reveal his secret. It was up to him.
Thank you, he thought to her, for your trust. She smiled – it wasn't beaming, it didn't spread across her whole face – but it was soft, gentle, and meant only for him.
He cleared his throat.
"I'm Tuxedo-Kamen," he blurted it out. There was little point in trying to dance around that fact.
Another shocked silent moment passed over the circle of senshi. But then Minako rolled back, squealing in delight, while Rei scowled with obvious displeasure. And Luna looked outright suspicious.
How can a cat look so human?
Usagi giggled.
Ami stayed focused, barely phased by the revelation. "So, what exactly happened at the battle that you think caused this?"
"She was in trouble…" he began.
"…but he has good timing," Usagi quickly jumped in.
"As we were moving away, we were hit by…"
"… something. It wasn't physical."
"More mental for sure."
Minako and Makoto's eyes were flitting back and forth between them as the two of them passed the conversation back and forth seamlessly with barely concealed grins.
"That's when you both fell to the ground?" Ami asked, not sparing a glance from her screen, continuing to type away at the little device.
"And came up clutching our heads!" Usagi responded. "Kami-sama, it hurt!"
"It still hurts!" he echoed.
"Any other symptoms? When did you notice?" the senshi of knowledge questioned.
"Well, not right away," Mamoru told her. "I just woke up with a splitting headache. It doesn't seem like you're hearing someone else. It's like it's your own thought."
"But it doesn't make any sense! Like why would I ever be craving a cup of coffee?" Usagi asked, her face twisted in disgust.
"Or find my best friend super cute," Mamoru added with a smirk.
"Your best friend is super cute!" Makoto interjected.
He sighed. He didn't have the patience for teenage girls.
You love every minute of it.
"So, I've got good news and bad news," Ami began. "The good news is neither of you have been affected physically by this. And your brains both look to be rewiring themselves to accommodate the other. It's quite fascinating really – like you're becoming one individual brain, while maintaining two separate bodies!"
"Ami-chan!" Rei interrupted sharply.
"It's not that abnormal actually. Many couples who have been together or married for decades develop some similar neurological symbiosis, but it usually takes…"
"Decades! Yeah, we heard you Ami-chan! What's the bad news?"
"The bad news is that it appears to be accelerating, and I have no idea how to fix it. You may be stuck like this."
"Amiiiii," Usagi whined.
You're loving every minute of it, he thought mockingly – earning him a pointed blue-eyed glare.
He smirked.
The bluenette held her hand up to forestall the objection. "I will try Usagi-chan, but I have no idea what we're dealing with here. I don't want to promise anything."
The black cat moved forward, and nuzzled Usagi's hand. "We will of course help Ami-chan in any way that we can," the cat spoke.
Mamoru jumped. Of course, he had already known the feline could talk. But experiencing it was altogether different – almost creepy.
Usagi started laughing.
"What's so funny?" Luna demanded.
"Nothing..." but everyone kept staring at her, and she shrugged. "Mamoru just finds a talking cat somewhat… intimidating."
"That is not what I thought," he objected, his voice surly and petulant even to his own ears.
"I thought intimidating was more polite than creepy."
The feline looked over at him in surprise, and then smirked in the most eerily human fashion.
Definitely creepy.
…
Usagi groaned upon waking, clutching her throbbing head that must have been trampled on by a thundering stampede in her sleep. Even after a whole week linked, the headache never faded, especially in the morning. It was so much worse in the morning.
Ami had insisted the headache was not a sign of continued harm or brain damage. She hypothesized it was probably just the fact that they were apart and their symbiotic brain was getting stimuli from multiple places, and they weren't equipped to totally make sense of it. The attempt to do so was, well, headache inducing. She suggested the best remedy was to spend time together so there was less contradictory sensory information sent to their heads.
It hadn't taken long to discover that the senshi of wisdom and knowledge, was unfortunately correct. The migraine lessened when they were in the same room – and was even better if they were sitting next to one another. But it's wasn't like her parents would suddenly be okay with sleepovers at Mamoru's, and would probably be even less okay with his constant presence in her bedroom.
So, to give them both a short respite before school, Mamoru had taken to picking her up for school. And that meant she had to actually wake up in the morning. But this turned out to be easier than she thought it would be because the second she was conscious, feelings of anxiety about lying around, or worse, being late, would spiral around her skull. She hated this new feeling, and she blamed her new mind-mate completely! The boy seriously needed to learn to enjoy a good lie in!
I prefer a leisurely morning routine.
She ignored the errant thought as she pulled herself out of the warm nest of crumpled blankets towards her outfit that she had set out the day before. Why had she done that? It was bad enough that her room was actually clean. She had resisted the urge to tidy up for days, but her skin crawled every time she walked into her usual disaster of a room. She had finally broken down and deep cleaned the whole space, loudly cursing Mamoru's existence as she did so.
But isn't it so much more pleasant now? Less cluttered so you can actually think?
I was doing just fine before!
The truth was the room was now so organized, it didn't entirely feel like her own. It was like her safe haven of haphazard chaos had been violated with his obsession with cleanliness.
Though it was nice to be able to find the right manga volume within seconds.
Are you smirking?! You'd better not be smirking!
She quickly dressed and grabbed her briefcase, knowing he was already outside. She waved calmly to her mother who smiled knowingly at her daughter as she made her casual exit without breakfast.
She thinks we're dating.
That makes sense under the circumstances.
Usagi growled in irritation at his calm acceptance of the statement. Couldn't he have at least blushed or something? Like why didn't her embarrassment carry over to him the way everything else did?
"Because I'm more accustomed to people making inaccurate snap judgements of me," he told her as she slipped into the seat beside him.
She ignored his words, and instead laid back and allowed her eyes to close, basking in the sweet relief of an almost pain free existence.
"It's good to see you too Usako," he said sarcastically into her continued silence, as he drove them to what was now their regular café. They both decided that they didn't want to explain their sudden attachment at the hip to Motoki by heading to the Crown.
"I'll talk after you've fed me," she growled. She knew for a fact that he was very aware that she was not a morning person.
That's what makes it so fun.
Shut up and drive, baka!
Breakfast was non-eventful, though the meal did wonders for her mood. But it passed by too quickly, and soon she was bracing herself in preparation for the return of the pulsing migraine that would return as soon as he drove away.
I'll miss you too, Usako.
She made her way to class focusing on her breathing – maybe the headaches would become so normal she wouldn't even notice them anymore. And at least she was suddenly doing way better in her two worst subjects – Math and English. Today, they had a quiz in Algebra, and she hadn't even bothered to study knowing that Mamoru's brain could solve her "simple" algebra problems without thinking.
At her desk, she pulled out and organized her materials – a pencil, plus an extra one just in case the first one broke, a highlighter for word problems, and a large eraser.
"Usagi-chan?" Naru asked, leaned over her desk – her eyes wide with concern. "What are you doing?"
The blonde glanced down at her materials, each organized by color in perfectly straight lines ready for any eventuality, and blushed.
Normally, she would have had nothing before the teacher walked in, and been begging a writing utensil off her seat partner after the quiz had been passed out.
With an aggravated growl, she purposely scattered the pile of materials so it looked more like her normal disorganized mess.
"What are you talking about?" Usagi asked innocently.
"You're just so… prepared."
"I studied really hard for this quiz," she insisted.
Liar.
Shut up, baka.
"I want to do my best."
"That's awesome! Well, good luck Usagi-chan!"
"Thanks!"
The instructor entered, and after routine instructions, handed out the quiz. Usagi finished the ten-question assessment in record time. Between having nothing to do and having Mamoru's Tuesday's college morning lecture on physiology of the endocrine system droning on in the back of her head, she was bored out of her mind. She quickly distracted herself by doodling chibi Tuxedo Kamens on the back of her test.
Cute.
Kami-sama!
His condescending smugness was intolerable! Especially now that she could never escape it and when she could feel it herself!
"Ugh! Just shut up!" she screeched, clutching the skull that betrayed her constantly.
"Tsukino-san!" teacher called out in shock. "Please give me your quiz and take a step outside."
The blonde quickly complied, her head hung low in embarrassment at her outburst.
"I can't believe you made me do that," she whispered into the deserted hallway.
I didn't make you do anything.
"Who are you talking to?" her red-headed teacher asked, suddenly appearing at Usagi's shoulder, causing the blonde to start in surprise once again.
"Just the voices in my head," Usagi mumbled in defeat.
"And during the exam?"
"The same," she confirmed.
"Tsukino-san, this is a perfect score. And forgive me for being suspicious, but this is nowhere near your normal performance. If you tell me who you were talking to you'll be in less trouble than if I discover it myself."
"I swear I wasn't talking to anyone," Usagi insisted. "The quiz is my own work."
To be fair, that quiz is my work. You're definitely cheating.
Shut
up baka!
"For your outburst in class during a quiz, you have detention this afternoon, and I insist that you come in during lunch to make up a second version of this quiz."
"Yes sensei."
She could hear the mocking laughter in the back of her head.
I'm so going to get back at you for this!
…
For Mamoru, the biggest change in his world, besides having a teenage girl in the back of his brain, was that he could suddenly read people. Not only his closest friends, like Motoki, but his casual acquaintances and classmates as well. With just a glance, he had some of an idea on who was excited, upset, or stressed out just from a slump of the shoulders or a furrowed eyebrow. He even knew what to say or do to maybe make those who were struggling more comfortable or supported. He fought the urge more often than not though, worried that his inclinations were not truly his own. But every now and again, he'd have what he called an "Usagi Moment" and his normal inhibitions would just drop.
It was driving him crazy.
Take this morning, for example. Saori had been sitting at a table in the cafeteria, completely alone, her head hanging low, gripping her dark hair absently into her own fists.
He had sat opposite her without thinking.
"Saori-san, are you okay?" he asked her.
"Ma-Mamoru-san!" she greeted with a slight smile and sat up straight in her seat. "I was just thinking about some things that I would like to change in my life, but it feels so impossible."
"You want to talk about it?"
It had been an innocent offer. He didn't like seeing anyone so sad, and he had just wanted to make her feel better. He hadn't expected her to confess to having feelings for him or that she had been secretly despairing that he would never notice her right when he walked over.
He had then stupidly offered to get to know her better, perhaps over coffee.
He groaned. He hadn't just asked her out had he?
You totally did. But she's gorgeous, so what's the problem?
He dropped his aching head into his hands.
The problem Usako, is that you are in my head!
I was helping you!
He didn't bother to respond. Instead, he rubbed his pounding head, trying to find the projectiles that had to be lodged into it somewhere to be feeling this much pain.
Can we meet? My head wants to explode.
I'm waiting on you, baka.
And she was right – he could see the familiar environs of the arcade too easily through her eyes.
He arrived and took a seat in his usual stool. Usagi was sitting at a booth across the room with her friends. She didn't look in his direction, but she definitely knew he was there. Gave him what she had dubbed a "brain hug" in greeting, which was just a flood of warm feelings.
His headache all but disappeared, and he decided he didn't actually need to interrupt her time with her senshi.
"Hey Mamoru-kun!" Motoki greeted him passing over his usual coffee, and Mamoru found himself blushing slightly at his friend's presence.
"You have such gorgeous eyes," he said without thinking.
The blond part-timer froze like he had been slapped. "What?" he finally managed.
"Your eyes. One could get lost in them."
"Did you lose a bet or something?" The arcade worker asked with a wide grin.
The question shook Mamoru loose, and he turned to glare at the odangoed blonde at the booth across the arcade who had burst into laughter.
"Or something," Mamoru agreed, grinding his teeth, stomped over and dragged Usagi away firmly by her arm from her friends, who all looked beyond amused.
"You have got to stop making me hit on everyone!" he hissed, shaking her slightly with each word. She didn't resist his manhandling, though she was certain it was going to bruise. He forced himself to release her arms.
"I'm not making you do anything!" she countered, crossing her arms defensively across her chest.
He arched an eyebrow and glanced at Motoki.
"Okay fine! But that was comedy gold! You're just too awkward to appreciate it! But the girl – Saori was her name? You like her! And she is so into you! I didn't do anything!"
"I do not like her!"
This time it was she who raised the sardonic eyebrow.
"Okay, I've thought about it! Everyone has thought about it. She's gorgeous, but… You're changing the subject! The point is, you dropped my inhibitions and self-control," he growled, his eyes flashing with impatience.
"Not on purpose!" she argued back. "That's just the way I am! Personally, I think it's good for you. And I think if you stand her up after you asked her out you're a world class asshole."
"Usako…" he whined. "I don't know if it's a good idea to go out with one girl, while another is roaming around in my head."
"Are you kidding?! I would help you make a date go so much better!"
"That's not the point. How do I know right now if I like her because I like her, or if your preferences are influencing my feelings? It's not fair to lead her on right now, you know?"
She considered him for a minute. "That's fair."
"And can we talk about Motoki-kun for a second?"
"What about him?" she said, her eyes suddenly evasive.
"Look, I'm not saying you can't have a crush on him or whatever. But can you tone it down a bit? He's my best friend. Like one of my only friends. And right now, I can't even look at him without swooning even when you're not there!"
The fact that he needed Motoki in his life went unsaid, that he didn't want to ruin the friendship with romantic overtures. Motoki was amazingly forgiving of his various quirks but he was terrified he would cross a line and it wouldn't be the same. Of course, he didn't need to say any of that.
"I understand. I… I don't know if I can help it completely… but I will try."
He smiled gratefully, and he found himself wondering what she saw in his friend anyway who never really gave her more attention than any of the other girls that came into the arcade.
Probably the same things you do.
He is thrown by the thought, but it made sense. They both turned and watched Motoki greet another customer – an unfamiliar face to both Usagi and Mamoru with a bright smile. He was just kind – had this way of making you feel seen and valued. That whatever you had to say was the most important thing in the world.
You know he's like that with everyone, right?
I know he doesn't see me the same way. I'm like a kid sister to him. But that doesn't matter. I'm fifteen. Until I meet my soulmate, crushing on guys is fun!
Is it? It seems so all-consuming and distracting.
Did girls think of him that way?
"Oh, you have an entire fan club," she said out loud.
"What?"
You mean Tuxedo Kamen?
Him too definitely! That one is huge! But I was talking about your civilian identity. You didn't know?
But why?
It's probably the stoic thing you've got going on. You're tall, dark, with gorgeous blue eyes, and a killer smile when you have the sense to actually allow one to grace your features. They'd fall even more if they knew you had a tragic backstory and a major number list of insecurities to go along with all that.
"Really?" he whispered out loud, unable to believe it. And Usagi had noticed those features and thought he was attractive enough that other girls would crush on him?
She laughed. He could hear it and feel it. Soon he was too - able to feel her mirth, nevermind that he was laughing at himself and his own cluelessness.
…
Sailor Moon executed a high kick, throwing the youma eight meters backwards. She flung her tiara before it had time to recover, dusting it into smithereens.
"Nice job Sailor Moon!" Jupiter gushed, hugging the other girl from behind. The other three were not far behind.
"That was one of our smoothest battles yet!" Mercury claimed glancing through the data on her computer. "Hopefully, more of them can go this well!"
"Let's not get cocky," Venus cautioned, but her face split in a beaming grin as well.
Even Sailor Mars gave her a pleased dignified nod.
The Lunar Guardian took it all in – trying not to blush. She failed miserably. Eventually, the others left to go back home. It was two in the morning after all, but Sailor Moon stayed staring at the moon which was full tonight.
Thank you.
I didn't do anything.
Maybe not directly. But I can feel you – I know you're there. And I don't feel as afraid.
He swooped down from his hiding place, landed right beside her, and quickly enveloped her petite form in a hug.
She tensed for a moment, feeling overwhelmed at the swirl of both his and her own emotions – relief, pride, unwavering trust, respect, and admiration. She could barely put names to any of it, and she definitely couldn't sort out what feeling came from each of them.
She forced herself to relax, and returned his embrace. It didn't matter.
Because it was clear that neither hero wanted this moment to end.
…
A/N:
Special shoutout to TinaCentury who helped me brainstorm ways in which Mamoru's personality and quirks could bleed into Usagi to drive her crazy.
My next updates are likely to be a Reveal and an Invisible Wounds chapter. After that I'll start obsessing over Coming of Age and Fighting Fate again. Life is still crazy. Updates will continue to be slow.
Reviews are love!
And inspirational fairly often if you're craving more from me!
