Chapter 3: Rivalry and Ranches

Inferno (Tepig) Lv 10 / Male / Careful (Tackle, Tail Whip, Ember, Odor Sleuth)

Lucky (Purrloin) Lv 6 / Male / Modest (Scratch, Growl, Assist)

Xena (Mareep) Lv 5 / Female / Lonely (Tackle, Growl, Thunder Wave)

I trained Xena a bit on my way back to the ranch, and happened to catch a bug in passing. A Sewaddle, to be precise. I mean, it paralyzed itself on my electric mutton chop, so it was pretty much asking to be caught. I named him Bumble, for obvious reasons, and continued on. I think I'm getting the hang of this whole catching Pokemon thing.

Long story short, Xena figured out how to use ThunderShock, and I made it back to the ranch. Fortunately, I guess my killer sheep was scary enough that no more of the flock came looking for me. Now I just have to find…

"Hey Nate! Here for some training?"

Speak of the Christmas tree.

Hugh came rushing over out of a fenced in pasture. "All right! Let's see how much stronger you've become! Come at me!"

What? No preamble? Just the battle. Fine, Hugh, let's see how you like Xena, warrior sheep!

That… wow. So, I guess I didn't realize how much of an advantage Electric had against Water. One ThunderShock from Xena and Hugh's Oshawott was reeling and paralyzed. A second one, and, well…

Good monster sheep.

While Hugh spent some time apologizing to his partner for his humiliating loss, I gave Xena a good ear scratch. I quickly learned not to touch the wool. One bad shock was bad enough.

"Not bad…" Hugh admitted. "You're thinking about how to bring out your Pokemon's strength. I should be able to count on you for backup!"

Sure, whatever you say, man. Really I just remember basic type matchups.

"What are you doing here anyway?"

Well, your dumbass left without an all important map.

I handed over my buddy's sister's map. Maybe this time his training will end without a loss. Get it? Yeah… comedy.

"Tch… She didn't have to do that…"

I kinda think she did. You're lucky you're not neck deep in a swamp now.

Anyway, Hugh got over his tsundere big brother moment and thanked me for bringing the map. I was just about to jet, when a pair of ranchers ran up, dog Pokemon in tow.

"I thought it was lively around here! You were having a Pokemon battle, huh? Isn't it nice to be young?"

Was that what we were doing? I though we were playing paddy-cake.

"Who are you?" Hugh demanded of the rancher and ranchette.

"Who am I? I'm the owner of this ranch! And this is my wife!"

So… no names, then? I'll keep calling them Rancher and Ranchette, in that case.

Ranchette passed us some Potions, to heal up our Pokemon. Well, Hugh might need it, but Xena's still perfectly fine. Eh, you can never have too many Potions.

As Hugh tended to his fried otter, Rancher asked us if we've seen a Herdier wandering around. I'm not sure what that is, but as he mentioned having two of them, I'm guessing it's the dog Pokemon.

"It's the first time this one has wandered off, so I'm a little worried…" Rancher continued.

At that moment, Hurricane Hugh came tearing out of the sidelines, getting right up in Rancher's face.

"You're a 'little worried'? Are you kidding me?!" he screeched. "Your Pokemon might be lost forever!"

Dude, chill. It's probably still on the ranch, just hiding or playing.

"Whatever! I'll look!" Hugh turned on me. "Nate! Help out!"

I mean… I was gonna anyway. Jeez.

Hugh tore away, leaving a bemused Rancher in his wake. I shrugged, then turned and began to stroll across the ranch. I mean, tearing around like that would just spook the Pokemon, right?

[Nate saved the game.]

There were a lot of wild Pokemon on and around the ranch. Like, tons. I got a good deal of training in with Inferno and Xena during my search. And I even managed to catch a Riolu. The little bipedal canine looked so much like a small martial artist that I had to call him Lee. No Lee in particular, just Lee. He didn't seem to be interested in training, though, to my surprise, so I got him to be Inferno and Xena's cheerleader instead. He took to that like a Goldeen to water.

During the training, Inferno learned what had to be the coolest Attack ever. Flame Charge, a flaming Tackle. Badass as hell!

I grinned as I watched Xena dominate a lesser sheep with her lightning. Where is your Arceus now, sheep?

Wait, what's going on? Xena started glowing strangely. Is it a new attack?

No, wait, she's transforming. It's… evolution! No way! Xena's evolving!

The light cleared and I saw the new form of my warrior sheep. A... Flaaffy? Really, Pokedex? That's what it's called? Anyway, she looked less wooly, with just a ruff around her neck and some on her head. Her skin turned pink as well, and she stood on her hind legs. Neat. She's looking slightly more badass than the killer fluffball she started out as.

So, anyway, badass sheep upgrade aside, there wasn't any point staying in this part of the ranch anymore, with no Herdier in sight. Inferno in tow, I jogged back towards Rancher, only to see Hugh tearing off somewhere behind the ranch. Huh, maybe he's on to something.

I followed Hugh to what I though was 'behind the ranch'... only to find more ranch. Damn, how much land does the jolly Rancher own? This area had grazing areas, but also trees, so it ended up being like a maze. Gotta be hell to be a ranchhand here.

I began exploring this new area, only to be waylaid by a battle with the ranch janitor. Ranchitor? Jancher? Why does a ranch have a janitor? Whatever, he was weak anyway.

Hugh was still stressing about the missing Pokemon, but he took some time to share his latest discovery with me. Someone had forgotten a pile of Parlyz Heals under a tree. I mean, working on a ranch with the thunder sheep from hell, you're gonna need those.

"Yawrp!"

A sudden bark off in the woods caused our heads to snap around to look.

"Did you hear that just now?" Hugh asked, before sprinting off. "I'll check this area!"

What area? It's a maze of trees!

Whatever, I'll just go deeper into the labyrinth. It's kinda annoying how the trees were just close enough together to prevent me from see — wait! What's that?

Well, there was a dog Pokemon, alright, just like the other one Rancher had. But… who was that guy standing with it?

No, not with it. Over it. Kinda menacingly. He looked like a creep too, in some geeky black and grey uniform, with a mask over his mouth. The dog, Herdier, cowered in the face of the menacing weirdo.

"Yaawrp…"

"That cry! You found it!"

Apparently Hugh heard the Pokemon's whine. Good. I'll have backup —

"What a relief! Ok, I'll go call its Trainer, so you stay here with it!"

Whaaat?! Hugh you son of a Muk, get your ass back here and help me out! Dammit, now the creep spotted me. He's glaring at me…

"Tch… You little pest!"

Next thing he did, I kid you not, was launch into the beginning of a villainous monologue.

"I'm a member of a group that strikes fear into the hearts of those who stand before it: Team Plasma! Ever heard of it?"

Well, everyone and their mother has heard of Team Plasma. They caused a lot of trouble two years back, woke up two Legendaries, hijacked the Pokemon League, all the normal evil team stuff. Then, the Hero of Ideals, the current Champion, Hilbert (dumb name), trounced them. He captured the Legendary Zekrom, beat N (dumber name) and Reshiram, stopping them from showing the 'truth' of this 'dirty world' by the gracious deed of stealing every Pokemon in the region, and basically made blue and red the new black. Heck, I even got influenced… just a bit.

But, I mean, I wasn't gonna say all that. So, let's just shake our head, shall we. And try not to smirk right in his dumb face.

The weirdo in black looked like I just set his Pikachu on fire. "Really? We're the righteous group that tried to conquer Unova two years back in order to liberate Pokemon!"

Nope, Imma just play dumb here.

He snarled at me. "Whatever… Fools will never understand us… Still… First I get lost chasing Herdier… and now some nosy kid caught me."

Sucks to be you, but man, you are 100% Skuntank wanker. No offense, just an honest criticism.

His hand clenched angrily around a Pokeball he yanked off of his belt. "All of this is your fault! Take this!"

He threw it at me? Wait… that's not a Pokeball… Dude, did you mean to throw a TM at me?

"OK! I'll use this opportunity to retreat for now!"

'Kay… Whatever floats your Wailord, man. I mean, I was just looking for the dog.

Speaking of the dog…

"Yap! Bwoof!"

Hey! Stoppit! Down Herdier! Go back to humping electric sheep!

At that moment, my salvation from doggy drool appeared, in the form of Hugh and Rancher.

"Herdier! What made you come all the way back here?" Rancher chided the prancing Pokemon, who fortunately found his new target. "Well, at any rate, I'm really grateful for your help, you two!"

Two? What did Hugh even do, other than ditch me with a masked creep? On the subject of that masked creep, ya gonna do anything about him?

"You're awfully calm about this!" Hugh accused Rancher. "You Pokemon might have been gone for good!"

As much as I hate to agree with Mr. Outrage, he's kinda right in this case. I mean, I'm pretty sure I stopped him from being dognapped. Or maybe it was just the stoic presence of Inferno by my side. Buddy, you put on a few pounds or something?

Anyway, Hugh finished chewing out Rancher, who turned to thank me, I guess. I was done listening anyway. This had been a long day. Let's just stroll back to town, dodge Alder, and book a room for the night. I'm sure nothing eventful could happen on such a short walk…

Welp, I was wrong.

Inferno just evolved. If I thought he was getting fat before, it's nothing compared to now. Inferno, like Xena, was now up on two legs, looking every inch the Pig Knight he had become. Or, I guess, Pignite. But I like mine better.

Plus, turns out he's a Fighting type now. Seweet! He learned Arm Thrust, which is perfect for slaughtering Patrats. All in all, I can't complain. A great first day as a Trainer.

Hang on… this was all one day?!