Chapter 22: If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.
"So…" I start, unsure of how to make this situation any less uncomfortable.
"So…" Kai repeats, not helping. I fiddle with my string on my coat.
"How do you know he'll come?" I venture, unsure if I was asking too much for the reassurance.
"He'll come." That's it. No other response. Not that I didn't expect it to go this way. This was how it always was. Me worrying, him perfectly fine. As if to prove that my thoughts were all a lie, he takes my free hand in his and squeezes it. I relax a little and squeeze it back.
I'm not completely sure how we ended up here in the middle of the park at whatever late hour of the night it happened to be after we'd discussed, and discussed, and discussed things. We'd covered dad's obsession with control and planning every aspect of everything down to the tiniest speck of dust that could interfere; my role in interfering; how serious that really is (yes, very serious); how far he's willing to go to stop me from continuing in this role (very far); annndd the creepy attendant? butler? driver? also Kai's contact... Apparently he is in charge of relaying information between the two of them as neither would speak to the other directly without being cross or fighting. Seems like a terrible job if you ask me but I guess he'd been employed with the family for the majority of Kai's life. Also a very strange (strangled?) relationship. He seemed loyal to neither of them and both of them at the same time. I don't think I will be adding him to any Christmas shopping lists though any time soon. I'm still a little heated about our last encounter…
For this discussion, Kai and I had been positioned on the bed so that I was facing away from him while he had gone on to explain everything he'd deemed worthy enough of mentioning regarding our current situation. I knew it wasn't everything. I still had this feeling he was leaving out quite a lot actually. But that wasn't what was important right now.
I had been most taken back by his father's complete disregard of any moral standings, especially when considering his administrative procedures.
"How could he use a little girl like that? Is he trying to intimidate me by making me think even little girls could be targeting me?" I had huffed and looked down at the floor, moving to a sitting position at the side of the bed. "If that's the case, I'm not sure I would win."
"What little girl?" Kai had asked as I stood up and crossed my arms before he could reach out a hand to comfort me.
"He had a little girl sell me some candy." I had responded, still trying to figure out just how far this maniac was willing to go just to scare me a little. Was he just trying to scare me? Was that really all it was? What he really wanted was Kai's return, right?
"You took candy from a stranger? That sounds so…cliché…" Kai muses, half delighted at how silly it really sounded.
"It was a little girl!" I'd protested loudly, going to hit him with the nearest pillow I could grab. "I hope she didn't know what she was doing. She was so cute with her little curls, bundled up all warm with rosy cheeks. She was trying so hard to be bold. She couldn't have been older than 10, I woulda guessed 7 or 8 though based on her size. I suppose children grow differently though. Even at..."
"Ray." Kai halted me before I could go any further. "Focus." I'd blushed and turned to face him again.
"Sorry..." I swallowed back the guilty feeling and dropped my arms. "I just can't get over how completely DEVIOUS this all is. It all seems so... so..."
"Calculated?" Kai offered, to which I nodded. "That's what he does." He'd leaned back on the headboard and unfolded his legs. I had crawled up over him and snuggled into a spot next to him with my head resting between his leg and his stomach, my arms hugging his leg by the knee. His hands had instantly found my head and brushed through a few stay strands of my hair. "That just means that we have to be smarter about it. He's underestimating you." He pauses. "Like I did." My breath caught in my throat as I held back my initial shock. Was Kai really opening up right now? And being serious about it? I didn't want to ruin the moment by doing something stupid so I had just buried my face in his leg and held my breath for however long it took for the words to fall away and for the room to feel at peace again.
And then we'd come up with this great plan to just confront the main problem head on and finally end all this. At first he had decided to do it on his own, like he always does but I had stopped him at the door and insisted he take me with him. I only partially regretted that now as I hear the car door open and close behind us and the two sets of approaching footsteps that make me wince and squeeze Kai's hand a little harder.
To my surprise, he doesn't let it go when we both turn to face our 'guests'.
"I am pleased you got my message but it seems it wasn't clear enough," Kai's father coos calmly, taking a minute to run his eyes over me and then Kai, making a displeased face when it crosses over our intertwined fingers. I would give him the upper hand with how his looks still make my skin crawl but Kai doesn't even hesitate.
"I don't take kindly to people who lie," he throws out with enough malice to make ME upset. Unfortunately, Kai's father must be used to it because he doesn't even bat an eye. Instead he waves it off and tilts his head away in dismissal.
"I never lied. You came back, didn't you?"
"Only to tell you to stop." I suddenly can't take the pressure of the dark atmosphere they are both just building upon so before Mr. Hiwatari can respond I wave both of them quiet and step between them, dropping Kai's hand to do so.
"Okay, okay. This isn't really working for me so why don't you BOTH stop?" I flatten my hands in a calming gesture, one for each of them. "Look. I know you don't like me…" I turn to the older one. "I don't really like you either. But this isn't how we solve problems. I mean, maybe if we were tiny children and we were fighting over a toy or something else stupid like which one of us is faster on the monkey bars it would be…"
"Ray." I stop talking, a little embarrassed, as Kai's hand pinches the bridge of his nose. But he seems less tense and certainly less irate, which was half of my goal. On the other hand…
"I see you at least have him well trained." A little amused…I'll take it. Maybe I wasn't the best at handling tense situations without the easy way of settling it with the winner of a game, but the dark air was clearing and things seemed slightly more civil. I could take that moment to be offended that he had made another dog reference about me but that would just add more fuel to an already burning flame that I had just calmed to a flaring flicker.
"Anyway…" I continue, now that I don't feel like I am being met with only heated glares of disapproval and hate. "We can just talk about this like normal people. Preferably somewhere less frigid." I shiver as a response to my own words, realizing a little too late that it is still the middle of winter, it is dark out, and the park at night is colder than a morgue must feel. Kai takes a step towards me and offers me his scarf, wrapping it around my neck before I can accept or decline. I had forgotten mine is our quick exit and welcome it with a grateful smile. The gesture only makes Kai's father scoff in annoyance before crossing his arms. The warming face that Kai had been making slips away as he fixates another glare upward at the other man.
"If you even know how to just talk." The words sound mean, but Kai's tone is quieter and was relayed more as a suggestion than an insult. His father takes the bait and sighs.
"I don't see the point but as you wish." The whole mood changes as he waves his hand and his driver snaps into motion, offering us the backseat of the car. I don't move, the prospect of sitting in a cramped car with two feuding family members not seeming much better than the freezing air of the open park. At least in the park someone might hear me scream.
They both pick up on this and seem to offer their responses at the same time.
"We're not getting in there," Kai protests at the same time his father states…
"I'm not a monster."
I snort. Unable to hold it back. And then I am laughing, the whole situation being completely unbelievable. Kai's hands grab onto my shoulders as if to calm me and I feel Mr. Hiwatari's eyes watching me unfavorably. The outburst is quickly forgotten when someone clears their throat.
"If I may be so bold, there seems to be a coffee shop open over there," the driver indicates the coffee shop across the street from where we are. I nod and catch a glance at Kai who also agrees, releasing me and sending me a nod back. After a short, unspoken exchange, we all trek over and settle into a booth at the back of the little shop. No one else is there, not even the person who should be watching over everything and I imagine they might be taking a nap and the time must really be a lot later than I had thought. I mean, I knew it was late but just HOW late I was still unsure.
Kai's father has taken the seat across from Kai and I, while the driver remains standing a few tables away next to a wall by a hallway, which I assumed led to the bathroom. He was very much out of the way but still within sight, as any good attendant would be. Bodyguard maybe?
Not important. I shake my head of all other thoughts.
"So…" Here we are again. No words to say, awkward, unsure how to start. I feel like I start many conversations this way lately but at least this time is isn't met with the same awkward relay in return.
"I'm not going back." Kai responds first, and I release a soft breath of air, not quite making a full sigh. This obviously wasn't going to be easy.
"You know… The only thing worse than children fighting, is children with who think they've already won a fight because they have POWER. I hardly call this situation fair." I cross my arms, forgetting that I am talking to two strong and intimidating individuals and realizing that if I wanted, I could use the same backwards tactics too. Even if I had no power of my own, I could play the part and be convincing about it. But what were either of them really going to do? Kai wouldn't hurt me because this wouldn't even be happening if he could just do that. And his father…he couldn't REALLY hurt me because he wanted Kai's approval. I had just figured it all out. He hadn't been trying to intimidate me. Well, no, that's not quite it. He HAD been trying to do that… But he had been trying to make me the bad person here. So Kai would leave WILLINGLY. Any other way would not be a win. And I am too worn out to keep pretending to be okay with all this.
My head drops to the table with a 'thunk' and Kai jumps, a little taken back, as his father fails to hold back a gasp that he covers up with a hand. I think both of them had been too concentrated on threatening the other with their looks that neither had really been expecting my rather ungraceful retort. But before either of them can say anything I spring back to life with new resolve, putting my hands down on the table and standing up abruptly.
"What are you…" Before Kai can finish I interrupt.
"I think…if you weren't so busy finding everything wrong about this, that you would realize that we can help each other." Two critical looks.
"Just what are you suggesting?" the older one breaks first this time. I smile. And yes, it's absolutely crazy. This whole thing is. If I had been asked 3 years ago if I would ever be in a situation like this, I would have adamantly protested. But here we are. And what better way to deal with crazy situations, than to do something crazier?
"I'm suggesting that we be friends." I take a page from Tyson's book and throw my hands out to the man across the table as if for a hug. The two of them give me the same deadpanned dirty look before rolling their eyes at the mere idea of it. Almost as if in tandem they cross their arms and look away from me. "Hmn. Well at least I got you both to agree to something. Small victories…" I shrug and settle back down on the chair. "Maybe a challenge would be more effective. You both seem to like to win… So!" They both flinch at my sudden flare and are less enthusiastic to accept any more suggestions that might slip out of my mouth after that last one. "On to Plan B. Mr…um… Dad. Sir. I challenge you! To, a, well…" I search for the right words. "…to…get to know me!" I wish I had a camera to capture THOSE looks...
"Are you completely insane?" I had expected an adverse reaction but that was taking it a little far. Besides, that question was rather debatable.
"Hear me out. We've all agreed that the issue here is my presence in your life, but what we failed to acknowledge is WHY."
"We never agreed on anything like that." Kai glares at me. We were back in the safety of our own home and he is now free to express his feelings in a much more open manner than he had been when he knew they could be seen as a weakness by the other party involved.
We had departed from the coffee shop with an agreement that we would meet again soon to discuss the terms of our arrangement once everyone had had the time to mull over everything I had offered and come up with a fair counteroffer. Both Kai and his father had had no real objection or accepting of what I had proposed. My only thoughts were that if I could get him to like me, maybe he could change his mind about everything else he wished to throw on Kai's shoulder. Either that, or I could at least get them in the same room so they could communicate enough to come to a better understanding of each other.
I place two cups of hot chocolate on the counter between us and lean on my elbows in front of him.
"You're missing the whole point, Kai." He closes his eyes as if he doesn't even want to hear where I am going with this. I wrap my hand around his wrist and he reopens them to meet my silent request for attention. "He doesn't know anything about me that isn't written in a magazine, right? In order for him to go away quietly, we need his approval...right?" I try to get some sort of agreement from him that I am at least walking in the right direction. His complete lack of response isn't doing much for my self-confidence right now. "You're going to tell me that you don't have aaanny thoughts about what I am trying to do here?"
"He's dangerous, Ray. You already know this. Why would you agree to continue to meet with him after what he did to you?" I smile at his concern and take a sip from my cup.
"That's exactly why I am doing this." I reaffirm my choice.
"I don't follow..." He furrows his brow and watches me, trying to read my thoughts off of my forehead so he doesn't have to figure it out himself.
"Because he thinks he can scare me." I take another sip before putting the cup back down.
"You ARE scared." Kai relents, his hands wrapping around his own cup with a sigh of disapproval. He doesn't drink from it and I wonder if that means he's just holding it for it's warmth. I don't let that thought distract me from our deliberation and I nod.
"You're absolutely right. Which is another reason that I have to do this. If he thinks he can scare me, he'll keep doing it."
"If he thinks he can't, he'll just find another way to do it." Kai counters. "Maybe a worse one. I can't let you do that." He shakes his head, ending his side of the discussion. I frown and walk around the counter to hug him from behind.
"I won't meet him alone." I say gently, nuzzling my nose into his neck. "More importantly..." My eyes drift over his shoulder to the red blinking light at the back of the counter by the wall. "Are you going to call Hiro back? What if you get fired?" He huffs and pushes back from the counter, breaking out of my grasp and making his way towards the hall.
"Is that REALLY what you're most worried about right now?" I tilt my head at him inquisitively.
"Well it IS a very important issue. He's left 27 messages. I'm surprised Tyson didn't wake up and answer at least one of them." I pause, think a moment and then walk past the place where he had stopped by the doorway to enter the hallway. I stop in front of Tyson's door and contemplate knocking before throwing out formalities and quietly opening the door without announcing myself. Tyson IS there, sound asleep, an empty cup of water by his bedside with an open bottle of pills sitting beside it.
The doctor had given him medicine to help him sleep so the drugs could successfully purge themselves from his body without doing any further harm to him. Most of them had been eradicated in the hospital but the doctor was worried they hadn't gotten them all out of his system. They were also unsure of how strong of a dose he had ingested and were unable to determine if he would withdrawal. Sleeping through it all eliminated all the worst case scenarios and made it safe for him to be taken home rather than to stay at the hospital where they could monitor the progression, and Tyson has agreed to follow all the instructions he'd been given just so he could be released without the delay.
I hear Kai enter the hallway after me and he comes up behind me, probably knowing what thoughts had crossed my mind when I had left him in the kitchen. I close the pill bottle and join him in the hallway, slipping the door shut behind me as quietly as I had opened it. Kai looks me over and I don't have the energy to continue our conversation, knowing he would fight me with every step I took.
I decide not to say anything, instead I take a step forward and pull him close to me in a hug. He pulls away far enough to take my face in his hands and make me look at him.
"I'll take care of Hiro in the morning. I won't get fired." He promises before kissing my nose and leading me towards the bedroom. I let him push me down into the bed and take my clothes off, not in a sexual way...just to help me change into something more comfortable to sleep in. He changes his own clothes and settles down next to me, wrapping around me like he's holding a teddy-bear.
"This feels weird." I mumble after we stay like that for a moment in silence. I'm not used to be on the receiving end of such affections from him any more than he must be at giving them. Any other time that he'd held me like this, I'd either already been asleep or had initiated it myself by placing him there. As if to confirm this, he lets out a laugh that sounds close to a snort.
"You're right but just shut up and enjoy it." I settle for a minute, doing as he says, but the awkwardness doesn't subside.
"Kai?" I whisper, a little unsure of myself. He pulls me tighter to tell me it's okay to continue. "I just want you to know that I wouldn't put myself in danger like that if I thought it wouldn't work." He doesn't answer right away and for a second I think he might have fallen asleep already. But then he moves and buries his face in my neck.
"I know." he answers, the two simple words being enough to show me that even if he didn't like it, he was going to trust me. I smile, that being enough for me to let it go until morning. We stay quiet for another few minutes before I twist around uncomfortably.
"Okay, that's enough of that..." I grumble before he lets me go enough so I can snuggle up against his chest, wrapping myself around him the way we normally sleep when we happen to go to bed at the same time. Well, to sleep anyway...
He rolls his eyes but lets me do it, knowing we were both more comfortable that way.
"Thank you." I hear him whisper before I fall asleep. For what, I wasn't quite sure as too many things had happened that day...