Chapter Three: Snow
You're here, where you should be. Snow is falling as the carolers sing.
"What if my brain freezes and I can't come up with any of the answers. What if he thinks I'm dumb?"
"You're overthinking this, Remus. You're the smartest person I know."
"Oh god. What if I know too many of the answers, and he thinks I'm a know-it-all?"
"He won't."
"But what if he does?"
James had to keep great focus not to roll his eyes for the thousandth time. It wouldn't do for them to get stuck that way and cause him to crash his car. He knew he shouldn't have let Remus go home during the two hours in between their shift being over and trivia starting. His friend had worked himself into a frenzy by the time James picked him up.
"Listen to me, Remus," James says, turning down the music. "If he honestly thinks that of you, he's a shitty person and not worth your time. But he won't. Tonight will be fine. I'll be there to help you out along the way. I'm your wingman, remember?"
"You said that," Remus says, doubt creeping into his tone. "But you've also been rereading that note that came with the last batch of cookies. Are you going to get distracted?"
"I'm never distracted," James says, refusing to look at Remus directly. "I promise, I will stay by your side so long as you need me. We'd hate for Sirius to become infatuated with me instead, though, so try to be yourself. Give him a few of those condescending looks you give me, and I'm sure he'll fall for you."
Maybe Remus doesn't realize how ironic it is when he levels one of those looks toward James.
"Okay, okay." Remus breathes out loudly. He looks out the window. "The point is to have fun. If he's annoyed by me when we're having fun, we're not a good match."
"Exactly!"
They're pulling into the parking lot of the pub now, which is more crowded than normal. James attributes it to the theme and coming season. Everyone loves Christmas, so Christmas themed trivia is bound to be a hit.
Still, when he has to park all the way in the back, James can't help but be a bit miffed.
"Benjy says they're already inside," Remus says, looking down at his phone. "We're making a late entrance."
"We're not late," James tells him, unbuckling. "We're right on time."
"What if the seating is all wrong?" Remus presses, stepping out of the car. For someone so nervous, he's speed walking toward the door. James has to sprint to keep up with him. "What if there's not a seat next to him?"
"Then I'll make you one," James says, grabbing Remus by the arm and forcing him to stop and look at him. "Now, will you please calm down? Deep breaths, okay? You can't go in there like this."
James mimics a breathing exercise he'd seen his mother do once for yoga, and Remus follows him. When he's exhaled completely, he looks more grounded.
"You've got this," James says, gripping Remus' shoulders. "You're Remus fucking Lupin. With your cardigans and your whole... hipster look that you've got going on…"
"You have no idea where you're going with this, do you?" Remus deadpans.
"Not a clue," James admits. "The point is, you're amazing. Now, get in there and stun that boy with your knowledge of trivial information!"
Remus runs a hand over his face, but he continues purposefully to the front door. Someone opens it for them.
This pub is perhaps the first place James has seen this season that rivals the bakery for Christmas spirit. There are bursts of shining lights, several trees, and decorations plastered on nearly every flat surface. It's amazing that anyone can move around at all, but several people mill about, going from the bar to their seats with full drinks.
Sirius pops up from his spot at a booth near the corner and waves to them. "Oi! Over here!"
Benjy is sitting across from Sirius with his arm over a girl's shoulders. She's leaning into him, clearly comfortable and used to this position. Lily sits beside her with an empty spot on her other side at the end of the long booth. Sirius moves back into his seat, which is next to two other girls. James recognizes one of them as the other employee in the bakery.
Remus meets his eyes briefly and then sits on the edge of the bench with Sirius.
"We won't bite," Sirius says, grinning. "Unless -"
"Sirius!" The girl next to him, the one from the bakery, hits his arm.
Sirius rolls his eyes. "Come on in closer. Evans doesn't want anyone to hear our answers."
"We play to win, Black."
"You're in good hands then," James says, sliding in next to Lily. Probably too close, but it gives him a chance to look at the freckles dusting her nose as she turns to grin at him. "Remus is the reigning champ here."
Rule number one of being a wingman: hype up your friend.
"Really?" Sirius asks, looking impressed.
"Oh, yeah," Remus nearly squeaks. James can tell by the softening of Sirius' features that he finds it adorable. "I'm sort of a dumpster of useless knowledge."
Okay, James thinks, so he called himself a dumpster. Not exactly a swoon worthy comparison, but Sirius laughs, so maybe the joke lands better than expected.
"Lily's been studying for this her whole life," the girl next to Benjy says. "She's been quoting Christmas movies since we were in preschool."
"Only because Rudolph was our class show," Lily says.
"I caught you humming that song about the island of misfit toys in the supply room," the girl from the bakery says.
"And," Benjy says, "you made us put up a tree in the dorm even though we were leaving before Christmas."
"Guilty as charged," Lily says with an eye roll. "I'm sorry I want us to have a good holiday and maybe win some money for our tab."
"Well, I don't mind running it up," Sirius adds.
"Here, here," James cheers.
He tries not to feel too pathetic over the giddiness he feels when he and Sirius share a grin.
"I'm Mary, by the way," the girl next to Lily says, leaning across the table to introduce herself to James and stick out her hand. "Benjy's girlfriend. Lily's told me so much about you, James."
"Did she?" James asks, smiling at Lily. "Did she mention how hopeless I was at grocery shopping?"
"No," Mary says "That's not the word she used for you at all. She was right about how cute -"
"What does everyone want to drink?" Lily interrupts. "I think I'll get a cider to start."
"Anyone want to split the round with me?" Benjy asks. "We have a few more than our usual group today."
"Me, me, me!" the girl from the bakery chimes in, practically bouncing.
"This is Marlene, by the way," Sirius says, nodding this head towards her. "She's already had like twenty candy canes before we even got here, so she's hyped up on sugar."
"Speaking of, I have a secret stash of cookies under my coat." Lily pats the shape of what must be a box on her lap. "I don't know how they feel about outside food, but I thought it was good to bring them in case we need some trivia inspiration."
"Oooh, what kind?" the girl next to Marlene asks.
"A good mix so we could all have our favorites. We should get a good round of answers in, though, before we treat ourselves."
"This is Dorcas," Marlene says, echoing Sirius from only a few minutes ago. She puts an arm around her waist and kisses her cheek, still almost bouncing in her seat.
"I'm James and this is Remus," James says, noticing that Remus is too busy in a hushed conversation with Sirius to properly introduce himself.
He shares a small smile with Lily at their progress.
"It's going well, yeah?" he asks, lowering his voice over the noise of the crowd.
She knows right away to glance toward Sirius and Remus. Lily nods, looks back to him, and starts, "Yeah, I think so. They -"
Her eyes then go past him and her expression looks more serious.
The announcer is starting to speak about rules and other things James doesn't care for much. Everyone else turns their attention to the stage, but he keeps his locked on Lily.
It's like he has tunnel vision around her.
"I can write the answers," Lily volunteers. "Maybe you can run them to the scorekeeper at the end of each round?" She nudges James with her arm.
They're crammed into a small booth, so their closeness could be somewhat accidental. Once she makes contact, she doesn't pull her arm away.
That doesn't feel entirely accidental.
"Sure," he agrees.
Remus' head snaps around, eyes wide. "Are they starting already?"
"Mmm," James hums. "Distracted, are you?"
He meets his friend's glare with a smirk, chin resting on his hand. James doesn't miss the way Sirius' arm goes across the back of the booth, resting across Remus' shoulders.
Remus doesn't miss it either, based on the way his face turns red.
"Stop," he hisses at James.
"I didn't say anything," James says, smiling impossibly wider.
"They're already asking the first question!" Marlene says, clapping her hands together.
James refuses to break eye contact with Remus, just for the luxury of being a little shit, when the voice of the announcer booms around them.
"Alright, we're going to start with an easy one! In the song 'Frosty the Snowman,' what brings Frosty to life?"
James winks at Remus' flustered face before turning back to Lily.
"An old silk hat," he says easily.
"Yes," Lily says, already halfway through writing the answer. She looks up at him once she's finished and their arms bump again.
"In the claymation 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer,' who is Rudolph's father?"
"Comet!" Marlene exclaims.
"No," Lily says, her pencil posed over the paper. "That's the reindeer games coach. His dad is Donner."
"And Mrs. Donner!" Mary adds. "Since his mom doesn't even get her own name."
"Lily's right," James says.
How many times had he watched that movie growing up? It had been his favorite. He watched it every year with his dad as a tradition.
He hadn't even thought about it this year. Why did he not think about it? How many other things will he forget about because he isn't being constantly reminded of them?
He swallows and it tastes like acid.
"James…" Remus starts, immediately tuned in to James' shift. The concerned expression is there again. He wishes he'd stop looking at him like that.
"I'm fine," he says. Again. "Just hungry."
Sirius is looking at him with a tilted head. He doesn't buy it, but he doesn't press. James is thankful.
"We ordered some appetizers," Sirius says. "They should be here soon."
"What beverage company has been using Santa in their advertisements since 1931?"
"Coca-Cola," James and Lily chime together.
He looks at her and his smile settles back into place naturally. "Know it all," he teases.
"I wear that title proudly," Lily answers as she lifts her chin and lifts the pencil from the paper with a flourish. "Need a cookie to hold you over for the nachos?"
"That sounds amazing."
Lily starts to sort through the box and presents a wrapped yellow treat. "I packed this one for you. Didn't you say your favorite was lemon?"
James blinks. "It is."
Is Lily the person behind Doe?
He would be lying if he didn't say he desperately wants her to be. He feels like she is. Plus, he remembers mentioning his love for lemon flavored things to Doe, but he's also professed his love for a lemon flavored cupcake in front of Lily, so it's likely she remembered from that.
Still, his heart pounds.
He takes the cookie and stares at it for a moment. It's a lemon shaped Christmas star with icing carefully decorated across the top. For a strange moment, he feels homesick. Or maybe it's just his mother that he's missing.
He didn't think he'd be getting any lemon cookies this year, so he takes a slow bite to savor it.
Everyone else is busy chatting and not paying them any attention, so he doesn't feel so embarrassed when he looks at Lily like a child on Christmas morning.
"Thank you," he says. "This is amazing."
"Sirius baked it," Lily says with a wide smile, though he can tell that she's proud of herself. "I played around with some lemon icing recipes I found online. This one was my favorite."
"It's incredible."
"What was the well-known Christmas carol that became the first song ever broadcast from space in 1965?"
"Jingle Bells," James says, taking another bite of his cookie.
"Are you sure?" Remus asks, his brow knitting in the way he does when he isn't entirely certain. He can't stand not knowing something.
James rolls his eyes. "I'm sure."
His dad had made a big deal about it in one of his rants stemming from his fascination with radios. James had only been half listening at the time, but he remembers his dad's excitement over the idea of broadcasting into space. it was as if he had been the astronaut to hear Jingle Bells. He had actually teared up, his dad.
James wishes Fleamont were still around to tell more stupid stories. He would listen to them more intently now. He would ask for them like a child begging for a bedtime story.
"I think I remember my dad saying something about it," Lily says, writing down his response. "He likes random trivia almost as much as I do."
"Food!" Benjy says from the other end of the bench as a server comes to their table with several plates.
James doesn't realize how hungry he is until food is in front of him. These days, he isn't the best at remembering to feed himself. It's something he doesn't want to admit, because it makes him feel like a barely functioning adult.
His mother used to send him texts reminding him to eat.
He sets alarms now.
"I'm starving," he says, taking a bit of everything.
"Did you eat lunch today?" Remus asks, watching him fill his plate.
"Yes, Mother," James chimes, throwing his voice like a young schoolboy.
"We can always order more if we need it," Benjy says, also helping himself.
Lily looks up from their paper, where she writes the answer to a question James missed while filling his plate. She meets his eyes and grins for a second before stealing one of the potato skins from his plate. She takes a bite and is still smiling like a kid who got an extra dessert.
"Thanks, James."
"Gotta keep our scribe fed," he jokes.
From next to her, Mary laughs shortly and offers a loaded nacho to Benjy.
The rest of the evening passes quickly. James can't remember eating so much in his life. He also can't remember laughing so hard in a very long time. Even Benjy starts to rub off on him, and they share a fist bump over a crude joke.
Maybe it's the beer.
Maybe it's the Christmas spirit finally sinking in.
When they're announced as the winners, their table erupts in cheers, and Remus looks stupidly relieved. James makes sure to tell him so.
"Here you go," their waitress says, passing around their envelopes with their prizes. "A ticket each to the light display downtown, and a free meal from here. Good till after the New Year."
"I've never been to the light display," Remus says, examining his ticket.
"Really?" Marlene asks. "It's amazing! I'm sure you'd love it. Dorcus and I went last year."
Dorcus grins. "It was our first date."
"Do you want to go?" Sirius asks.
"To-together?" Remus asks, reverting back into a stuttering mess.
"Yeah," Sirius says. "We can go now. If you don't have anything else to do tonight?"
"I don't have anything to do," Remus tells him. "I'd love to go."
Sirius smiles, and it's charming enough to fit into a fairytale book. "Awesome," he says, before turning to Lily. "Do you think you can find another ride home, Evans?"
"I can take her," James says quickly. He looks at Lily. "I mean... if you're okay with that. I don't mind. Remus rode with me. Since he is going to be taken care of, I have room."
"Oh, I'm okay with it," Lily says, the envelope still held in her fingers like it's a more valuable prize. "But if it's out of your way, I can -"
"I'm really tired," Mary says, adding a loud yawn for emphasis.
"We can -"
James notices Mary elbow her boyfriend before he can finish that sentence.
"Yeah," Benjy amends, "I better get Mary home. She can be like Cinderella after midnight."
"She is a princess," Lily says.
"You're damn right." Mary wraps Lily in a tight hug and pulls away to hold onto Benjy's arm. "Have fun!"
Lily waves to them as well as Marlene and Dorcas, who say that they can walk back to Dorcas' apartment. Once Sirius and a thoroughly smitten Remus disappear out the door, Lily turns to James again.
He doesn't notice quite how close they are to each other until everyone else is gone.
"Thanks for the ride," Lily says. "Are you also tired?"
"No," he says, smiling. He's wired from being so close to her. "Not at all. You?"
"Not really. Would you want to go look at the lights? There's a few good neighborhoods we could drive through, or we could take a walk through town."
James grins. He sure it's brighter than any light display in town. "I'd love to."
Mary should be proud of her.
She had the courage, if it can be called that, to ask James if he wanted to spend more time with her.
And he said yes.
Without hesitation. With a grin that could have replaced the star at the top of the tree in the center of the town square.
She wasn't reading too much into the signals they sent each other all night and in their other interactions.
Part of her wants to ask the obvious question: Is this a date?
Another part of her is louder.
It doesn't matter if it is. That information wouldn't change the fact that she's in the front seat of his car. It wouldn't change whether she wants to be here. She wants to look at the Christmas lights and she wants to do it with him, as friends or…
Something else.
Lily covers a shiver at the thought by putting her hands in front of the vents.
James has already told her that the season is hard. He has enough to worry about, and she can try to help. She's not going to make it complicated or weird with confessions or possible misunderstandings if she can help it.
They were talking to each other all night. Laughing between questions, stealing food from each other (though she did most of the stealing), and sneaking in bits of cookie while they waited for points to be tallied.
If everyone else is off with someone else on this December night, she can spend it with someone she likes as company.
"Down this street," Lily directs, pointing to a corner. "Here is where they usually have the best lights."
"Wanna park?" he asks. "Or will the cold bother you?"
If Mary was here, she would have a clever comment about staying warm. But Lily isn't Mary, so she tugs her hat down to make sure it's covering her ears. "I'm good. Let's walk. It's a nice night too."
James finds a parking spot at the end of the street, and Lily tries not to swoon at the ease with which he parks. Honestly, it's just parking, but he makes it look easier than any attempt she's ever made at it. Plus, his hand across her seat when he backs up is a bonus.
He smells nice. Like pine almost.
"I've never actually done this before," he admits when they're side by side on the sidewalk. "Gone looking at lights like this."
"I haven't done it since I was little." Lily tucks her hands in her pockets and starts down the sidewalk. He follows by her side, matching his longer strides to hers. "My mom would drive me and my sister around to find the best places for a few nights. Then, once we found all the spots and my dad got off work, we'd drive around and drink hot chocolate and listen to Christmas music. We haven't done it in years, but..."
"It sounds like fun," James says. She wonders if it's the cold that's making them walk so close together or something else entirely. "It's funny, the things we stop doing when we aren't kids anymore."
"What's something you want to do again this year?"
"Hmm," James muses, looking up towards the sky. "Probably... wake up extremely early, like I did as a kid. Not waste the day away sleeping."
Lily laughs and lets herself brush her arm against his. A second later, she takes the hand closest to him out of her pocket so it not-so-accidentally bumps against James'.
"I wasted so many Christmas mornings as a teenager like that. I could give you a wake up call, but I can't promise that it won't be a horribly off key version of Mariah Carey."
James laughs and it echoes around them. "Not gonna lie, I'd probably love that. I'll have to give you my number before we leave just so I can hear it."
"I may have woken up Mary that way one November first after a Halloween sugar high sleepover. Hopefully you appreciate it a little more," Lily says, remembering. "Have you been able to try some Christmas recipes after we shopped? Besides your hot chocolate, of course."
"Not yet, no," he says as they pass a house lit completely up. They stop to admire it for a bit. "I'm afraid I'm not actually that good at cooking. I feel like I'm in a bit over my head."
"I'm not the best cook either. Mom says I'm too impatient for it."
"My mom never enjoyed sharing the kitchen, so I guess I never learned. I watched, but apparently I don't learn that way."
"My sister can cook. Then I went to college where there's a dining hall, and she moved out. I guess I'll have to learn at some point." Lily pointed to the next house, where the lights flashed different colors. "Look at that one!"
"I wonder how much work goes into decorating like this," James wonders as they move further down the street.
"I don't usually let myself look at the lights in the daytime. It gives away some of their secrets and takes away some of the magic." She reaches out to put a hand on his arm to stop him in front of the house.
"Is your sister older?"
"Just by two years. You're an only child?"
"I am," he says, keeping his eyes on the lights. "My parents had me later in life. I always wanted siblings, though."
"They're okay."
Lily lets the silence sit between them for a few seconds as they watch the house. Further down the block, the sound of faint Christmas music plays. The night is clear and crisp, perfect for getting into the spirit and looking at lights.
And then, like a perfectly choreographed moment in a cheesy movie, it starts to snow.
Her smile stretches her cheeks to their limit. Lily tilts back her head to look at the sky and puts a gloved hand out to catch some of the first flakes.
"It's snowing," she says, a little unnecessarily.
"Oh - wow," James says, following her movements. Snow is starting to lightly fall in his hair, sticking there, and Lily has the sudden urge to reach out and touch it.
Lily closes the fingers of her outstretched hand to resist.
"It's perfect," Lily says, following the paths of a few snowflakes. "Do you…" She looks back to him and again swallows the urge to brush the snow from his hair. "Do you need to go home?"
He looks over at her, shaking his head. "Not really. There's no one to really go home to, you know? Do you?"
"No," she says quietly. "No one really minds if I stay out. I wasn't sure how you felt about driving with us not knowing the forecast or - or…" She shakes her head, trying to get a grasp on what could easily turn into rambling. "Do you need to get warm?"
James laughs. "I'm fine, Lily. Really. No need to worry about me. I'm enjoying your company."
"Okay. Good." Her fingers tingle with either cold or excitement at the fact that he doesn't want to leave either. "Let's go to the end of the block and then back to the car? We should take some pictures too."
He grins, making her feel warm to the tips of her fingers and toes.
"Alright, Evans."
James' hands tighten around his steering wheel until his knuckles whiten.
It seemed like a good idea when he and Lily decided to stay out a bit longer and enjoy the snow and Christmas scenery. In fact, he still doesn't regret it. He doesn't think he could ever regret anything that lets him spend more time with her.
They just hadn't anticipated the impending amount of snowfall.
James swallows nervously as he tries to make out the silhouette of the road. It's completely covered by now, and his wipers are working overtime to keep it off his windshield.
"How would you feel," he starts slowly, praying to God that he doesn't come off as a creep, "about going back to my house until this passes?"
"Is it close?" Lily asks.
"It's just down the road," he says, slowing down even more. "I'm sure I can make it there okay, but your house is still a good twenty minutes away without the snow. Who knows how long it would take to get there now."
"That'll work. I'll text my parents to let them know I'm somewhere safe."
"Okay."
He feels like he should apologize because it's in his nature, but he knows it's dumb. He didn't cause the snow and he certainly can't control it, but he doesn't want her to feel stuck.
It takes him less than ten minutes to get to his house, but it feels like an eternity. He didn't realize how dark and dreary the front looks until he spent the evening looking at other people's Christmas light displays. He doesn't even have a tree sitting in his front window to welcome him home.
Lily probably finds it depressing.
"Are you ready?" she asks, shivering for effect before she pushes the door open and goes for his front door, her boots doing surprisingly well on the snow slicked driveway.
James follows behind slowly. Partly because he's not wearing the right shoes and he doesn't want to fall. Partly because he's dumbstruck by her.
He watches as she stomps her feet on his front porch mat, attempting to get the snow off, and doesn't realize that he is just standing there staring at her in the snow until she looks at him and smiles.
"Sorry," he says, moving to open the door and hoping she mistakes the blush on his face for the cold. "It's probably a mess in here, by the way. Not much Christmas cheer to be found."
"It's warm," Lily says, pulling off her hat. "That's what matters."
Her dark red hair holds some static as she runs a hand over it to calm what the hat did. With her other hand, she shoves the hat into her pocket and undoes the front of her coat.
It takes him a minute to find the light, which is silly because he fucking lives here, but he's so nervous over Lily being in his house that he's forgotten how to properly function.
It'll probably take him a moment to get adjusted.
"I'm afraid all I've got are those instant hot chocolate packets," he says, walking into the kitchen where she follows him. "But it's better than -"
A quick shuffling of chaotic feet and the sound of something like a small motor catch him off guard. Though he should have expected it, he nearly jumps a foot in the air when his cat comes out of nowhere and launches himself onto James' shoulder, yowling in his ear for more food.
" - nothing."
"Oh my God," Lily says, though he can see that she's grinning like the whole thing is very amusing. "You can feed the cat first. We had our fair share of cookies at trivia."
James pinches the bridge of his nose. "Sorry about him. He's very demanding."
"He missed you."
James realizes that he's still standing there with a cat on his shoulder and doesn't think it's possible for him to feel any dumber than he does at this moment.
"Nah," he says, ripping the cat off his shoulders and tossing him on the ground. "He's just an asshole of a roommate."
"What's his name?"
"Sir Purr," James tells her, filling up Purr's cat bowl. The cat watches with vested interest, purring loudly. "I named him when I was like... ten. It's just us two here now. Two bachelors."
"We have some time since the snow doesn't look like it's letting up." Lily shakes out her bangs and gets her hair back mostly to what it looked like before their walk. "Do you have any decorations packed away?"
"Um, yeah. In the hallway closet," he says, pointing to direct her. Purr, apparently not as hungry as he led on, abandons his food as soon as James steps away to weave himself between his legs.
"Does he like tinsel?" Lily asks, moving toward the closet. "I saw this Tiktok of a cat chasing it."
"Oh yeah," James says. "He likes anything he can attack. Including me. You don't have to decorate for me, though."
"I'm not decorating," she says. "We're decorating. It'll be fun."
Fun.
Decorating with Lily instead of decorating by himself does sound fun. James also knows that no matter how hard it will be to sort through the decorations his mother packed up a year ago, it will be so much harder to wake up on Christmas morning and not see them.
He drags out the giant green tub, pushing it toward the living room. Purr hops on top of the lid, enjoying the ride as James glares at him.
"Santa isn't going to put any wet food in your stocking with you acting like this," he tells him, lifting him off the top. He runs off, bushy tailed, and attaches himself to the arm of the couch with wide eyes.
Lily leans over to scratch between Sir Purr's ears, which earns her a low, satisfied sound.
"Please tell me he has his own stocking. There has to be somewhere for Santa to leave some cat toys."
"He does," James admits, sighing. He opens the box and pulls out a stocking with a cat wearing a Santa hat printed on the front. "It looks just like him too."
Lily puts her hands under her chin and almost jumps in place. "I love it!"
Her excitement about everything - the snow, the decorations, even the silly stocking his dad bought for the cat years ago - is so genuine. Throughout the evening, since she made a declaration about Rudolph trivia and transitioned to nearly pouncing when she knew an answer, Lily has put less of a filter between whatever she must be thinking and what she does.
It's refreshing to see someone being so honest about themselves. She isn't hiding.
"What else is in there?"
"Um," he says, pausing a bit before he starts pulling things out. It doesn't sting as much as it should to be looking at everything. He wonders if that's normal. "A Christmas countdown snowman, a couple Santa figures because my mom was obsessed with collecting them, and…" He reaches to the bottom of the tub, where his favorite decoration is carefully placed. "A Christmas village set."
"Perfect." Lily takes a few steps across the room. Before he knows it, James catches the soft scent of vanilla, and she is standing only a foot or so away from him. "Where should we put it?"
He clears his throat, but the smell is lodged there so it does nothing to clear his head.
"The village always goes on the coffee table in the living room. There's a certain order to everything. The bakery can't be next to the fire station, because the baker's wife cheated on him with the fire chief. It's all very complicated."
Lily laughs, but it sounds like kindness more than anything else. "Tell me all about it." Gently, she picks up the village-sized bakery. "I can deal with complicated. I want it to be right."
James looks at her for a moment, not quite believing she's real. Surely, she's some sort of Christmas spirit sent here to make sure he doesn't have a shitty holiday.
She's a gift, surely.
He doesn't know what he's done to deserve her.
He smiles, accepting that he's likely done nothing, and takes a seat next to her.
"The bakery can go here," he says, designating a spot for it. Lily sets it down with care. "And next to it…" He reaches down, pulling out the first thing his hand touches. He laughs when he sees what it is. "The coffee shop. How appropriate."
"Maybe the baker's wife will walk in there this year," she says, taking out a roll of newspaper that holds some trees. She sets one down between the buildings. "Or they decide to hire a new counter girl who can go over to the coffeeshop on her breaks. She probably gets distracted flirting with the barista and leaves the cookies in a little too long."
"The barista will probably get so distracted flirting back that he spends all his time making hot chocolate to try to lure her back," he adds, placing another building out on the table.
"Do they write notes to each other? To pass the time between their meetings?"
It's not some great revelation like he thought it would be when he finds out for sure who is behind the Doe notes. It's not some heart stopping moment like he's seen on television or read about in books.
He had thought it would be Lily. He had hoped it would be Lily.
But now that she's here, saying it for certain, a calmness settles over him. As if he already knew. It's more like waking up from a dream and settling into reality. He already knew, somewhere deep down, that she had been the one writing to him.
"They do," he says softly, looking at her. "It helps him out so much during the week, he can't even properly express it to her. It makes him feel less alone."
Her fingers brush the back of his hand and then lay over it, so he knows the touch isn't accidental. "No one should be alone on Christmas."
He isn't sure who moves first. Likely it's both of them, because that's the type of people they've been to each other since they've met.
They always find a way to meet in the middle.
To cross distances for each other.
No matter who moves first or if they move together, James shivers as their lips brush.
She's warmer than he expects her to be, considering they've been outside recently, but her warmth nips at him. Nudging and waking something within him and making him realize he's alive in this moment. He's even more aware of how his heart is pounding, her hand curled above it on the material of his shirt.
He's felt so very frozen these last few months and he allows her warmth to thaw him. He allows her to make him feel alive for the first time in a long time.
Like most things she does, at least from what he's been around to determine, she doesn't hesitate into the kiss. She kisses him fully, putting all of herself into it. Everything he breathes in after his heart unthaws is vanilla.
It's intoxicating.
He moves his hands to her jawline, cupping and tilting her face into a more comfortable angle. He finds that this position makes her sigh into his mouth, and he likes the sound so much that he mimics it.
There's no urgency to the kiss, no clawing feeling of need to get closer than where they are currently, but he still finds himself fighting the urge to breathe when it creeps back up on him.
Not now, he thinks. Just let me have this for a few moments longer. Please. Just a bit longer.
But because he is alive, he needs the air and so does she. He allows himself the distance when the time comes to pull away.
"That was…" James starts, letting his forehead rest against Lily's. He can't think of a word to describe what happened. She's left him quite inarticulate.
"Perfect," Lily says. "It was perfect."
It's the same word she used for the little village shops only minutes ago, but her voice isn't the same this time. He hears it and feels it as a breath against his lips in the same moment. Her fingers find his hair and move so slowly through it that he can't decide if he wants her to hurry or keep them there forever.
Without warning, she kisses him again.
Once, short and sweet, squarely on the lips. A second time, closer to the corner of his mouth. When they're close like his, he can taste and hear and feel and see her reactions, all at the same time.
His heart does something he's never felt before when she leans her forehead against his again.
"Perfect," he repeats, still willing his mind to work. He takes a few deep breaths to steady himself before looking at her. He smiles. "Want to do it again?"
Yes.
That has to be the most important word of the night. She's said it several times, meaning it every time, but it doesn't lose its power.
Did she want to walk around and see the lights?
Yes.
Did she want to go back to his house and spend more time together when offered the chance?
Yes.
Did she want to kiss him?
Yes.
Did she want to do it again?
Absolutely yes.
Over and over again if she could.
And she could.
Several kisses and giggles later, they managed to set up most of the village. They put up the rest of the decorations from the box. She dangled some tinsel in front of Sirr Purr and laughed with her whole body when he chased after it.
She kissed James again.
Yes led them around the house and up the stairs. Yes had her memorizing his skin and reactions, even when they probably should have gone to sleep. Yes had her fumbling around in the dark when she woke up in the middle of the night in an unfamiliar place, but yes also had her finding a path back to his bed.
Yes had her pressing a kiss to his sleeping jaw and fitting her head against his shoulder to fall back asleep.
When she wakes up, her position hasn't changed. Her arm instinctively tightens around his middle as she shifts. She stretches a little, as much as she can without really moving, but she doesn't want to give up the spot against him.
Her spot, Lily's mind says, a little dizzy at the thought.
With the morning sunlight coming in through the curtains, Lily kisses the line of James' jaw again. "Morning," she says, unsure if he's awake enough to hear her.
It doesn't matter.
The greeting is for her benefit almost as much as it is for his.
He groans sleepily, adjusting to the morning sun and nuzzling the side of her cheek with his nose.
James has to feel her smile.
"Morning," he says, his voice groggy. He stretches and she shifts with him before his arms wind around her again. "Did you sleep well?"
"Mhm," she hums. Lily moves so her lips vibrate against his neck. "Did you?"
"Better than I have in a long time."
"Good." She imitates him by nuzzling her nose against his neck, hoping it sends the same sparks to his toes. "Thanks for asking me to stay."
"Thanks for agreeing to stay so we didn't end up on the side of the road," he says. His fingers trace the curve of her spine, making it tingle. "This is much better, I think."
"Much better than the side of the road." She nudges her foot against his under the blankets. "Do you think we're snowed in?"
"I'm not sure," he says, squinting at the window. She wonders how much he can see without his glasses. "I don't really want to get up to find out, but breakfast also sounds nice."
"Sirr Purr should bring us some," Lily mumbles against his neck. "Then we wouldn't have to get up."
"He's an asshole. He lives to be served, not to serve others. I'm honestly surprised he hasn't busted in here yet."
As if on cue, a pitiful meow comes from the door.
Lily lifts her head to look at the crack of the open door. A few seconds later, the cat pounces onto the bed and steps over their legs. He stands, observes them, and meows again.
"Good morning, Sirr," Lily says. She moves her hand to scratch behind his ears again.
"Mmmph," James groans, head buried into his pillow. "I'm jealous over a cat."
"Why would you be jealous?" Lily asks, keeping up the scratching when it earns her a pleased purr. "I slept next to you all night. Practically on top of you, really."
"Because I'm selfish and spoiled and don't like to share. If my mom was around, she'd agree with me."
"Aw, it's all right, Potter. I'm here." Lily tilts her chin up and kisses him.
Her heart skips.
She curls her fingers into his hair and smiles against his mouth. Sirr Purr makes an annoyed sound when she moves her leg to the other side of James' hip. Lily pulls away, her hair framing his face as she grins down at him. "Is this better?"
"Much better," he says, grinning boyishly at her. "Though you probably shouldn't spoil me, if we're being honest. I'll get used to it and pester you forever."
"You have permission to pester me if I get to do this." Lily ducks down to kiss him again.
Is she being too much?
His grin tells her that she isn't.
"We're going to be absolutely annoying at work, aren't we?"
"Probably no more than usual," James says, laughing. "At least for me. Remus is always having to call me down."
"And Sirius went with him on that date last night," Lily says. "So we won't be the only insufferable ones. Do you think they got snowed in too?"
James' eyes widen comically at this. "I had forgotten all about them! Oh my God. I bet you anything they did. Should we text them?"
"I have a better idea." Lily reaches for her phone on the bedside table and rolls off of him. She sits so their hips are touching and tugs on his arm to make him sit up with her. Ruffling her hair to take away the worst of her bed head, she grins at their image in her front facing camera. "We should send them this."
James smiles, looking handsomely disheveled. When Lily clicks the camera button, they look like they've done much worse than snuggling through the night.
"Remus will die," James says, over her shoulder. "Absolutely die."
"Then we'll know if Sirius is with him, since I sent it to him."
For good measure, she answers Mary's text with the picture too.
As soon as it's marked as sent, her phone buzzes with an incoming picture. She clicks over to it to see Sirius with an easy grin and Remus with pink across the high points of his cheeks.
She flips the phone toward James.
"And there they are! Thank God Marlene is covering the store today."
"Where are they?" James asks, squinting at her phone. "Oh my god. They're in bed together. I say like we aren't also in bed together. I wonder if that's Sirius' place?"
"They aren't the same sheets from high school, so I can't be sure."
Lily turns her camera on them again and snaps a picture when she kisses James' cheek.
In the photo, he's beaming wide enough that she knows she isn't alone in the way she feels right now. Quickly, she moves her thumbs over the screen to make it the background photo on her phone. "Here," she shows him. "This one's for me."
"Can I?" he asks, taking the phone from her.
She watches as he types in his name and number in her contact section and then sends himself the photo. His phone buzzes from next to her, and when she hands it to him, she watches him go through the same steps she just did.
"There," he says, laying back with one hand behind his head. She has to physically pull her eyes away from him to see them on his phone's background. "We match."
"I love it."
Sirr Purr sneaks under her hand again and meows until she pets him. If she listens carefully, she can catch the faint road noise from outside as the houses around them start to wake.
James is still smiling at her when she looks at him again.
She could get used to this.
"Are we ready to brave the snow? Or do you want to stay in bed a little longer?"
"Let's stay like this for a bit longer," he says, reaching out to brush some of her hair from her face. He laces the end of it around his fingers. "Just for a little while."
"Okay," she agrees, reaching across him to set down her phone. She leans into the proximity, fitting herself against him like when they woke up. "This is the best snow day I've had in a long time."
Sirr Purr makes a frustrated growl and jumps off the bed.
"Me too," he says, pausing and shutting his eyes for a long moment. If he weren't still twirling her hair around his finger, she would have suspected him of being asleep. In the next moment, he opens his eyes and they're soft. He smiles at her warmly. "Tell me about Christmas at the Evans house."
"Well," she says, keeping her voice low and steady despite the way he manages to make her heart beat furiously. "It's the one day of the year when I don't mind waking up before six in the morning."
James gets to work Monday morning somehow both early and heavily distracted.
He's been in a Lily Evans induced fog since she left his house after spending not one but two nights. They hadn't done much, save for getting him a Christmas tree and watching old claymation Christmas classics together and eating Chinese takeout.
It had been nice to have another person in the house. To have someone around the corner waiting for him. He had almost forgotten what it felt like, to exist near another person in that way.
Waking up next to her had also been quite nice.
His whole bed smells like vanilla now.
It almost made him feel helpless on Sunday when she left. He's got a whole slew of text messages he can scroll through to see that she's very much present, but it's not the same.
He hopes he can manage to sneak away at some point today to go see her.
James is propped up against the counter and daydreaming when his clouded over eyes finally register that there are two figures in front of the shop. He regains focus to see a very comfortable looking Remus and Sirius chatting. Sirius is propped up against the glass in a manner far more easy going than anything Remus can produce, but James can tell by the way his friend's smile reaches his eyes that he's smitten.
Christ, he may be in love with the way he's looking at Sirius.
After several long moments in their own little world, Sirius pushes himself off the window, hands still in his jacket pockets, and kisses Remus once. Then once more. And then again.
James is beginning to wonder if he'll have to break them up when Remus finally manages to wave goodbye. His cheeks are pink when he opens the door, but James knows it's not from the cold.
Sirius gives James a wave as he heads to the bakery, and James returns it while keeping his smirk set on Remus.
"Well, well, well," James says. "Someone certainly had fun this weekend. Remus Lupin, is that a love bite on your neck?"
Remus starts to reach for a spot on his neck but changes the course of his hand at the last second to scratch behind his ear. "Don't even start with me, James Potter," Remus says. "I saw that picture Lily sent. What are you hiding under your collar?"
"Her scarf," James answers, completely unfazed. "She left it at my house, so I'm going to return it to her when I drop off the hot chocolate."
"I need coffee." Moving behind the counter, Remus starts the espresso machine. He puts his elbows on the counter. "Things must be going well with Lily."
"They are," James says, smiling at the mention of her name. "And Sirius? How was it? All jokes aside."
"Good," Remus says. He rubs the back of his neck self-consciously, but the blush doesn't return. "It was good. We're, uh, going out again this week."
"That's great! Did you guys end up at his house this weekend?"
"For one night. With the snow and everything…" Remus shrugs. "He lives in his own place, but I went back once the roads were clear so my mom won't worry so much. She likes to know where I am during school breaks."
"My mom is - was like that too," James says, swallowing. His heart skips, but doesn't sink quite like it did before today. Before Remus can give him one of his scrutinizing looks, he asks, "But that's great, right? You really seem to like him. You don't fall for people easily."
"Yeah," Remus says. He still eyes James carefully, but when he doesn't react, Remus continues. "I like him. He's funny and far too clever for his own good." He smiles, probably remembering something from the weekend.
"Far too clever for his own good sounds like your type," James says, snorting.
"You're completely smitten with Lily at this point, aren't you?"
"Yeah. I - I like her a lot, Remus."
"I thought so." Remus adds some creamer as he makes himself a cup. "I think it's good for you. You look… lighter."
"I feel lighter. That's a good way of putting it." James pauses for a moment, nearly letting himself slip into a redheaded daydream before shaking his head. "Is it bad we're so smitten so soon?"
"I blame the Christmas spirit. People are always falling all over each other in those holiday movies."
"Tis the damn season," James says, pushing himself off the counter and preparing the drink carrier. "Well, I'm going to return a scarf and make a trade. You want anything?"
"Can you ask for one of their cranberry scones? Sirius had some extras in his apartment this weekend and got me hooked." Remus leans back against the counter and takes a drink from his mug. "We shouldn't be busy for awhile. I can handle it."
"Alright, I'll try not to get too distracted."
The air is cold two days before Christmas, but James feels warm as he walks to the bakery. Maybe it's his heart working overtime at the thought of Lily warming him or the quick way his feet are carrying him to her.
Or maybe it's just the extra layer of her scarf around his neck. Most likely that's it and he's being a dramatic sap.
When he enters, it's to find Lily behind the counter.
"Hey," he greets, unable to stop his grin. "Did you decorate even more since I was last here? I swear there's more. It's a regular winter wonderland."
"There's only a few days left. I have to take advantage of it." Lily puts one hand on the display case, her cheek twitching to break her put-on serious expression. "How can I help you?"
"I have a craving for something sweet," he says, leaning against the counter. "Any suggestions?"
"You're in a bakery." Lily taps the top of the case. "Do you like anything you see?"
"Maybe," he says. "But it's not in the case, and it's not for sale."
Lily's teeth capture her lower lip before she covers her mouth to hide what has to be another smile. "I can take my lunch at one. What can I give you before that in exchange for those hot chocolates?"
"Any more lemon cookies?"
"Of course." She ducks down to take a pack she kept in the back. "Just for you."
"You're amazing," James says, taking the cookies and beaming. "Have I told you that?"
"Maybe once or twice, but I'm like Sirr Purr. I never get tired of hearing it."
James is fishing a cookie out of the bag when the door to the kitchen opens and Sirius comes out with a tray full of new cookies.
"Hey, Evans. These are cool and ready for the display. Do you mind setting them out? I assume you won't burn the store down doing that?"
"You're the one who set off the last smoke alarm," Lily says, taking the tray from him. "Plus, James is supervising."
"Is he now?" Sirius asks, winking at James. "Is that what you call what you've been doing? Is that your kink, Evans?"
James snorts into his cookie, unable to help himself, and ends up choking.
Sirius wacks him on the back until he stops coughing.
"I know yours, Black, since you'd already gone in the bathroom once to touch up the foundation on your neck."
"I have no shame," Sirius says, looking like he truly doesn't. He leans against the counter, looking at James. "Nice scarf, by the way."
"Thanks," James says, unraveling it. "It's actually hers, but I happen to think it's more my color."
"You could have kept it. I was thinking about coming by after work anyway to -" Lily's eyes cut over to Sirius. A beat later, they go back to James. "Do you have a minute for me to ask you about something?"
Sirius, occasionally tactful, takes the hint. He pushes himself up from the counter and salutes, going back into the kitchen. "No PDA in front of the customers, Evans!" he calls a little less tactfully as they hear one of the ovens open.
"What's up?" James asks once he's certain they're alone.
"Do you have plans on Christmas Eve?"
James shakes his head, smiling. "Not a single one."
Lily tangles her fingers in the strap of her apron and twists it worriedly. "Would you want to come to Christmas Eve dinner? At my parents' house?"
She's nervous, James realizes. She's nervous about asking him and worried that he'll say no.
She's so cute he can't handle it.
They spent an entire weekend together. He'd follow her into Holly Jolly Hell if she asked him.
"I'd love to," he says. "What time?"
"Really?" She lets out a breath that can't be anything but relief. Her hand drops from her apron, and her face brightens into a wide smile. "Dinner's at three, but you can come by earlier. Whenever you want, really. You could bring those sweet potatoes you were telling me about."
"Alright," he agrees. "Sounds perfect. Anything I should know before I come over? Topics to avoid? Does your dad have a sports team he hates that I also should?"
"My sister and her annoying new husband are going to be there, but I don't even care. You're going to be there." She tilts her head to the side, considering, but her smile doesn't fall. "Sports talk will endear you to my dad. My mom's going to be thrilled, so don't get too scared if she's moving really fast. Christmas Eve dinner is… kind of a big deal in my family."
"Big deal? Like I should dress up kind of a big deal?"
"No, a sweater is fine. Big deal like…" Lily twists her hair around her finger, so much like his finger was in her hair this weekend. "Like you're the first boy I'm bringing. The first boy like you. I brought Sirius back in high school when his family was being awful, but you're the first boy who…"
"Oh," James says. He realizes the full meaning behind her words a second later. "Oh! I'm the first boy you've ever brought home for Christmas?"
Lily nods, her fingers more tightly wound in the ends of her hair. "The first. If it's too soon or you don't want to -"
"No, no! I want to! It's definitely not too soon. Nothing about you feels too soon."
"So you'll come?"
"Of course," he says. "If you want me there, I'll be there."
"I want you there. I really, really want you there."
An oven door closes more loudly than necessary a second before Sirius is looking through the window at them. "I need to conquer these cinnamon rolls, Evans, so I need my fuel."
Lily rolls her eyes and takes a drink from the carrier, turning to give it to him. "See what you've done to us, Potter?"
"We're monsters," Sirius adds, clinking his cup against Lily's.
"Good thing I'm quite fond of monsters," James says. "I better get going, though, or Remus will wonder where I've gone to. I think he's less likely to fuss at me today though."
"You're welcome," Sirius replies with a smirk. "Is that good for another round of these later?"
"Most likely," James says. "Don't drag him into a closet or anything. I'm actually awful at making coffee. I can't be left unattended on that front."
"You're not going into a closet today, Black," Lily says. "At least not until after your shift. You need to be in the kitchen baking for the inevitable pre-Christmas Eve sweets rush."
"I'll stay decent until then," Sirius says with a sigh. "Only for you, Evans."
"I'll tell Remus you said hello then," James says with a laugh. To Lily he asks, "See you at lunch?"
With a quick glance to the door, she leans over the counter and kisses him briefly. In a flash, almost as quickly as she moved to kiss him, she's back on her feet and looking the part of the Christmas village bakery counter girl.
"Hey!" Sirius protests.
"I'll see you at lunch," she confirms. "Enjoy the cookies."
James leaves the bakery with the feeling of Christmas cheer on his lips.