Neither Lord of the Rings or any Marvel plotlines/characters/copyrights are owned by me. Just in case you were wondering.
Warnings: Cigars. Because Logan. If that's considered a warning.
They made it to the forest by nightfall.
"Are you sure we can trust whoever's in the shack out here?" Logan had fallen back to the end of the half-line, half-clump that made up the group. Tony, near the front, decided not to face him.
"What makes you think we can't?" He rubbed his arms from the cold, then left them crossed.
"Oh, I don't know. Usually an abandoned shack in the middle of the woods doesn't have lights." Tony did a once-over, then spared a half-glance Logan's way. There was enough sign of an audience for Logan to continue.
It was, Steve, however, who spoke next. "If there's someone in there, and the slightest chance occurs that they think we're bears, we'll find another spot. If they're an ambush party, I think we've got it covered." He flexed his shoulders involuntarily, shifting the weight of his shield.
"Unless it's just a plant," Logan argued. "If those guys searching for you are as in-depth as you think they are, they couldn't have missed this house on their way out of here."
"You're with us for the ride, buddy," Clint muttered. His muttering always seemed to come out loud enough to be heard. "They'll be searching you too." He coughed, changing subjects to address Logan more directly. "They couldn't have missed the porta-potty either, and they didn't stop to snoop."
"What is that supposed to mean-"
"It means that we have no idea what they're aiming at, and this is our one shot for the night."
"We'll get barricade and shelter. Besides, if there is someone inside, we could get an alibi and location."
"That's a very optimistic view you've got there, Captain."
He heard no reply. Logan peered ahead. The 'abandoned shack' he'd thought he'd seen was much larger than any wooden shack should be. Up close, it didn't look normal.
'Now fancy that,' he thought. 'a house out of and in the middle of nowhere made to blend in from above.'
"Say," he said. "I think we've reached a big glowing building in the middle of nowhere. Seems legit."
"Logan, no!"
Too late. Logan had already gone inside, followed by Stark, who gripped his activator bracelet, then Hawkeye.
Steve was, well, beside himself in a mix of confused anger, empathetic regret, and preparation to fight.
"Whoa. Nat! You've got to see this!"
Natasha almost rolled her eyes at Hawkeye's outburst. "Clint?" No answer. "Clint!"
A faint but distinctly Clint-ish yell could be heard. Natasha rushed inside. Captain America followed reluctantly but dutifully, slinging the tricolored shield off of his back as he increased his speed. Which left Thor and Loki, and that combination is always the most disastrous.
Loki evidently knew this, and as an idea entered his mind, a small grin grew at an alarming rate on his face. Thor began to suffer worry.
"Hey Thor, I dare you to go in first."
"What?" Thor was deciding between standing watch or taking action. He was nearly going to choose the latter but for Loki's remark, which gave him concern.
Loki nudged his brother (ex-brother?). "Whoever is the least manly of us goes in first..."
In which ensued a wrestling match where they both tumbled into the building.
These are the events, once fully recalibrated, that they encountered. Clint was in the equivalent of a power interrogation.
"What happened?"
"Nothing." Which of course had to be said cheekily.
"Then what was the yell for?"
"It was the easiest way I could get you to come in. I mean, look; it worked!" An impishly traced grin clearly framed his cheeks.
Natasha punched him. Hard. Clint appeared none the more bruised.
"You pick a wrong enemy to prank, Clint."
"I know." He was obviously unaware of her anger, or he was doing this on purpose. The second thought was more likely.
Captain America, meanwhile, was standing aside, unsure if he should interfere. Logan and Tony were seemingly oblivious to all this, standing farther away. They were in the middle of their own conversation.
"I'll pay you twenty bucks."
"Only twenty? C'mon, you're the billionaire here. Make it at least fifty. And add in my cigar pack, for good measure."
"Hey, I'm the one calling the shots here, and I think you're better without them."
"You want me to do it or not? It's harder to break a cigar habit when you've been doing it for almost a century."
Logan had tried to light a cigar on a particularly bumpy route in the van, causing Steve to confiscate his 'stash' until further notice. He had recently been found trying to put matches between his teeth, which was probably more dangerous, but Steve wouldn't relent.
Stark was closer to Steve than Logan by far. So he was bargaining for his beloved pack with the only person in the group who he could probably get a deal of this sort from.
Aforementioned, such a conversation caught Steve's attention, although he himself was oblivious of what they were saying. He started walking over anyways. Nothing productive but trouble assumedly followed in the combined shadows of the pair. He affirmed this when they immediately stopped talking and stared at him, Logan on the offensive/wary side, Tony- who's suit was now on, but helmet open- obviously startled.
"What's going on here?" Steve's wary tone complimented his on-guard position.
"Oh, Stark's trying to get me to break some part of this shiny but totally useless wall right here."
Steve was aghast. Seeing his expression, Logan assured him,
"Don't worry, I was a lumberman at one point. Besides, I'll get him to pay me first."
For some reason, this wasn't very assuring. It didn't help that Tony was trying to hit Loki's head halfway across the room. Logan did NOT want to deal with the aftermath that would ensue if Loki found out that cigars were flammable.
Steve, however, pushed this away enough to speak on more prevalent issues.
"Logan, we're all working as a team. I can't have any reckless moves jeopardizing our mission."
Logan scowled. "I'm the only one that can heal. Ergo, I go in first. If this shack happens to be full of goodies instead of agents, that's great. Otherwise, I'll be saving all your butts."
"Maybe in the short run, but let me ask you this." The way Steve could personalize was almost astounding. The sincerity and seriousness refused to let Wolverine's eyes move away.
"If you went in here and found some agents, there would be collateral damage."
"I'll walk it off." Logan shrugged, but Steve shook his head.
"I'm not talking about that kind of damage. There's no way you'd fight quietly. Then S.H.I.E.L.D. gets our location before we can leave, and what after? Who knows how close to the area they still are? There's too much at stake to do this blindly. We need to think through our actions before busting out a few bad guys. Not everyone's an enemy."
A voice came from behind.
"Well then, this was unexpected!"
They both froze and turned towards the sound. A woman with a certain embroidered emblem on her jacket studied them all in their respective areas, her face tight with stress.
She was from S.H.I.E.L.D.
"Uh..." Logan's eyes slid towards Steve, fists already curling into fighting position.
Captain America pushed to the front, almost disbelieving. "Maria?"
"Steve!" She gave a small terse smile that lasted about a second. "Glad to see you made it safe. Do you have it?"
Steve gave her a wary look but remembered Coulson mentioning trusting her.
"I have it." Tony stepped into view with a quiet mechanical 'clink'. Maria's eyes rose. "Didn't see that coming." She looked behind him, then returned her focus on Steve, almost expectantly. "I need to speak with Coulson."
At his name Steve's eyes lowered. "I…I'm afraid that's not possible."
"Caught?"
"Missing in Action." Natasha shared a gut-wrenching smile twisted with emotions smiles shouldn't consist of.
Maria blinked, then studied the giveaway faces to make sure it was true. "Oh." She blinked again, this time with a little shake of the head. "Oh." There was a beat of silence. She gestured behind herself and began to walk away. "Come on. I'm guessing he never got to explain."
There was, in the larger and more modern-than-should-be house, a dining room table, or something close enough to resemble it.
"Take a seat. This is probably the safest place you'll find for a while." In truth, the house had been built for stealth, and intercepted many technological uses that most people seemed to rely upon.
Cap listened to all- well, most of- her talk intently (modern technology went way past his head). Taking a seat, he leaned forward with hands folded, brow creasing as he tried to focus. Tony, meanwhile, deactivated his suit and slid into the seat next door, cheek resting on his right fist as he slumped past Cap's head.
"So. How much do you know?"
Clint, opposite of Steve, rested his cheek on his left fist. "We have a destructive flash drive that needs to dissolve somewhere, and S.H.I. . wants their hands on it. Badly." He pushed himself off the dependence of the table and sighed. "That's all we know. Oh! And I think we're in Canada?"
"Eh…" Maria hesitated at the last part. "Technically? There's a bit of a fuzzy line that you won't want to get into."
Clint shrugged. "Fine by me." In his opinion, the less known about his whereabouts, the more he could honestly say he didn't know when- and in his mind there would be a when- S.H.I.E.L.D. finally caught up.
The cool voice beside him picked up where he left. "Just tell us where we need to go."
Maria consented. "If you continue along the forest, you should notice it easily. Problem is, once you leave the forest, S.H.I.E.L.D. can find you. It's mostly flatland out there, from what I can tell." She pulled out a map and gestured to a small box drawn upon it. "That's you." She then trailed her finger to a white mountain. "That's where you need to go."
Loki, who had remained relatively silent to anyone but Thor in the past two days, was shocked. "Are you serious? That distance is enormous, let alone reasonable for mortals to cross unseen. Even if I cloaked you all-"
"Which you won't," Natasha interjected.
"The supplies you'd need in food and water are against your best intentions." Those calm and intelligent eyes with an undertone of surprise begged to reason with the rest of them.
Steve glanced up from the maps to Maria. "Do you have anything we can go off of, provisions?" He knew he may have been asking too much, but Maria seemed to think otherwise.
"Of course. This is a safe house, after all. But you'll need to be careful."
"Well warned." Steve nodded his gratitude. "Thank you."
"Hold on, am I the only one who's wondering how a mountain is the key to our problem?" Sprawled out, Tony now leaned back, incredulous.
Maria pursed her lips, then traced a small area on the mountain with her finger. "There should be an opening two-thirds up. You'll be seeing the insides of a semi-dormant volcano."
"That's where we drop it in."
"That's where you drop it in."
Thor was in contemplation. "Will the volcano not explode?"
Again, Maria hesitated. "There is a small chance it could erupt. I'm sorry."
"Back-up plan?" Tony knew what the answer would be- in which case, he decided to ask something else.
"What's on this file, anyways? What could possibly be so…earth-destroying?"
"Power." She studied Tony carefully. "There was a project made to build a machine. In good hands, it would be a risk. In bad hands, well…you know how it goes. And it doesn't take long for power to corrupt. S.H.I.E.L.D. thought they could keep it under wraps, but- well, Coulson detected beginnings of Hydra respawning."
Steve's fist tightened considerably.
"With the new alien technology, we can't risk anything. It has to go."
Steve shrugged almost dejectedly. "What's to stop people from building something like this all over again?"
"And why is S.H.I.E.L.D. after us if we're giving them a favor?" This was from Wolverine.
"Celadon used to be the prized glaze of Korea before its formula was lost in the 1400's. They still can't replicate it- they've gotten close, granted- but the original formula is gone. As long as they're not on the mark, we can at least prepare to defend ourselves. And S.H.I.E.L.D.," she continued, addressing Logan, "happens to be under some convoluted dealings right now. I have no idea whether they have actual instructions to take you down."
Wolverine snorted. "They certainly seem intent on trying."
Not much was added to the conversation after. It was late. Maria invited them to sleep and showed them the room with supplies.
"Take anything," she said.
Steve rolled the map into the pack nestled on the underside of his shield.
"I'll keep first watch," he said.
Nobody argued.
Well, most of the explaining muddle is sorted...I think.
Thank you guys SO MUCH for reading this.
I very much enjoy reviews. I'm not one to post reviewers' names on author's notes or things like that, but I do try to take all reviews into account-and I appreciate them immensely.
If you have any questions/theories things, I can try to answer that in this strange LOTR kind of setting (Note: this is being based off of the LOTR movies).
Thank you again.