"I can't be like all of you. I can't."
Claire looked down at the warped railings of the bed where her hands had been and glared at them with horror and disgust as though the sheer power of these emotions could reverse what she had managed to do. She clasped her hands in her lap and clenched her jaw, feeling a dizzying sensation as she attempted to process all of this.
Was she even a person anymore? Claire couldn't tell. Would it have felt different if she wasn't? Would she even be able to tell?
Meanwhile, however, the press conference on the television set played on, and Claire's breath caught in her throat as she heard what Lex had to say next.
"I stand by my assertion that metahumans are a menace," Lex continued vehemently, his gaze flicking from the crowd in front of him to the camera pointed in his direction so that Claire flinched, feeling as though he was looking at her as he spoke with coldness and sternness that Claire could no longer bring herself to associate with him. "And I will not rest until it is clear to them that this will not be accepted in our city."
A break of applause from the crowd.
"They can live human lives like the rest of us, or they can go back where they came from -"
Diana reached up and turned off the television set, cutting off the approving whoop and cheer that came from the crowd as she saw the color draining from Claire's face. She let out a piteous sound, somewhere between a groan and a whimper, burying her head in her hands. Victor and Barry glanced at each other, both realizing that this was something they couldn't do anything about.
"Claire," Bruce spoke up, taking a few steps closer to the bed with his arms crossed over his chest, though upon hearing his voice, the woman seemed to snap to attention. "If it were just you in danger, I'd believe that you could keep the situation under control, but -"
"Just stuff it, okay?" she spat resentfully, getting to her feet with surprising steadiness and walking across the room to the sliding glass door leading to the small patio. As she shut the door behind her, Bruce let out a disparaged groan before looking over at Diana, who already bore a disapproving expression.
"Of all the people she wants to hear the truth from, I don't think you're at the top of the list," she said, gently raising her eyebrows much to Bruce's chagrin. That look meant that this was not up for discussion.
"I don't know what's going to happen to her," he said, throwing his hands up slightly. "This wasn't the way things were supposed to go."
"You don't play games with a Mother Box and come out the other side the same," Victor said solemnly, partially crossing his arms and looking down at the metal-encased appendages. He knew this to be true better than perhaps anyone. "And if she's anything like me, it's not gonna be easy to just accept it."
"She needs to," Bruce insisted, his brow furrowing. "I didn't want this any more than anyone else but -"
"Well, maybe she doesn't wanna hear it from any of us," Barry spoke up after clearing his throat gently. "I mean, no offense, but if I was her I'd probably fed up with hearing all of you guys talk at me too," he shrugged. "Maybe let her hear it from someone who hasn't had the chance to piss her off yet."
There was a moment of silent acknowledgment of the fact that of the small circle of people they had to rely on, there was perhaps only one feasible option. Thankfully, said option was capable of arriving very quickly.
Lex, meanwhile, was driving back home alone - something to which he was no longer accustomed. There was a certain strangeness to the absence of Claire's fidgeting in the passenger seat, her incessant flicking through emails or shuffling through her briefcase for reports with which to occupy herself. It was somewhere in the haze of these thoughts that he found himself driving not back home, but to the spot overlooking Metropolis Bay where he had last spoken with her before all of this had happened.
He stepped out of the car and leaned against the front hood, crossing his arms over himself with an oddly severe expression as he looked out over the water. There was an emptiness that he could openly acknowledge. If Metropolis was his kingdom, he knew he no longer wanted to rule over it alone. But more than that was a sense of validation.
Darkseid had come - and now that the can of worms was opened, there was the ever-present possibility that he could come again. For some time now, Lex Luthor had lost sight of some kind of power to be greater than. But now, knowing that Darkseid could someday return - knowing that he had the desire and the intention of mastering their world - renewed a dark, stirring sense of ambition in Lex Luthor to master it first.
Other people had, perhaps, more healthy ways of missing someone. Other people were not Lex Luthor. For Lex, this emotion was worth only what he could channel it into - what end he could carry it to. There was no power to be found in missing someone, and so, he could not bring himself to succumb to it.
Pulling his phone from his pocket, Lex quickly dialed in a number he had memorized and waited for two rings before the voice on the other line answered.
"Lenny, old pal," he said with a slight chortle to himself when Leonard Snart answered the phone. "I'd like you see about procuring me a boat."
"A boat?"
"No rush," Lex said in a casual, almost sing-song tone. "Just foreseeing a little bit of traveling in our future to pay our friend David a visit."
"You have a plane."
"Yes, I do. I also have a Ducati," Lex said in an amused tone. "I'd like a boat. Ten-four, Icicle."
Plans, Lex Luthor reminded himself, could stop for no one. He could not dwell on whether or not Claire would live. He could not dwell on whether he would see her again. There would soon be bigger fish to fry.
Claire had been standing out on the balcony for a good while - she had realized that LexCorp Tower was visible from one side if you leaned out far enough, and she had practically curled herself into the side of the railing in order to catch even the most modest of glimpses. It caught her by surprise when she heard the sliding glass door from the suit glide open.
"What are you doing here?" Claire asked, backing further against the handrail with a suspicious expression as Clark joined her on the patio, with Lois standing in the doorway. "I don't -"
"I wanted to talk to you," he said, and Claire had to notice how out of all of them, he was the strongest physically but quite probably had the gentlest voice. "I know you didn't want this. And I'm sorry," he said gently. "For a long time, I wanted to be human too. I know how much it means, and I know you feel like you've lost something. But you did something great, Claire. You saved my life. You bought us all time against Darkseid."
"If I did something so great, why does it feel so shitty?" Claire asked, her gaze downcast before she caught herself and cleared her throat, looking off to the side. "I mean, don't get me wrong. I'm glad the world is saved and stuff but..."
Claire felt a tightening in her throat as she spoke, and she shook her head as though believing this could dispel it. She took a few breaths before looking back at Clark with a helpless shrug. "I'm not going to be like this forever, am I?" she asked helplessly. "I... I just need to let it pass, and then I can go back to my life."
Her life. Her life, Clark knew without her saying, with Lex Luthor.
"I know you love him," he said, and the lack of judgment in his voice was enough to take Claire off her guard, her brow knitting in slight confusion. "And I don't doubt that he loves you. But he fears anything that's stronger than him. Anything that makes him feel small. And he'd go to any lengths to get rid of it. Love doesn't... it doesn't magically heal people, Claire. He isn't safe around you, and no one's safe around him."
Claire felt the tightening in her chest at the fact that she had nothing to say - no argument, no witty retort, no redirection. She feebly moved her lips to speak and came up meekly with, "He doesn't need to know."
"I have... a lot of opinions on the man you love, Claire," Clark replied gently, knowing better than to share said opinions in present company with the delicate nature of this conversation. "But of all the things he is, he's no idiot. He'll see it - no matter how smart you are, he will. It'll hurt him, and it'll hurt you."
"I can't just leave."
"I know you can't. I know you can't leave Metropolis knowing that Bruce Wayne has it in for Lex. Believe me, I get it," Clark said. "And I think I made you a promise the night you saved my life that if the man you loved needed saving, I would help you. No hesitations. Isn't that right?"
"What?"
Perhaps, Claire admitted in a far-off, tiny corner of her mind, she had been around Lex so long that this act of gracious magnanimity, of Clark Kent offering to protect the person who was so hell-bent on destroying him and had threatened everything he held dear, seemed foreign. There was a moment of wavering in her resolve, and she gently tilted her head to one side as though the statement was one she couldn't understand.
"There was a long time that I didn't know what I was in this world," Clark said with surprisingly vulnerability and candor, his gaze shifting off to the side of the balcony. "I had to go away - from everyone. From everything that I loved. But when I came back to the world, I was a better person for it. I was stronger -"
"You think I need to go away," Claire said in disbelief, shaking her head and feeling almost angry at herself for the fact that tears were springing to her eyes. She gave a bitter, quiet laugh as she swiped at her eyes. "Metropolis is my home -"
"I think it's time that you need to take for yourself," he interrupted. "I think that it's temporary, and I will do everything in my power to make sure that Lex Luthor is safe when you come home."
For a moment, Claire seemed to be fighting against realizing the gravity of the situation - but she realized, just from a brief glance around, first that Clark Kent was sincere in his promise and second that everyone was staring at her as though she were holding a timebomb, and only she could defuse it. But it was somehow all making sense - there was too much of a chance that Lex could not bear knowing what had happened to her, and no chance in the world that she could hide it from him forever.
"We can help you, if you'll let us," Clark continued, seeing the slow dissolving of the hostility in her expression and knowing that if ever there was an opportunity to convince her, it had to be now. "I know you don't trust any of them in there, and you have no reason to, but just let us help you. I can't promise your life will be what it was, but I can promise we'll do everything we can."
CLaire slowly leaned away from the railing, taking a few seconds to step away from it completely, but when she had released her hold on the metal that had warmed under her grasp, Clark nodded for her to follow back inside. Hesitantly as though she was only just learning to walk, she obliged. As she stepped back in through the sliding door, Lois reached over and gave Claire's shoulder a gentle squeeze.
"You'll be fine," she said.
"Define fine," Claire retorted with a weak smirk, lingering for a moment before turning back to see that they were now joined by a man she did not yet recognize, with tanned skin and a thick beard.
"This is Arthur Curry," Diana spoke up first, keeping her voice low as though they were in the presence of a frightened deer who could run away at any provocation. "He's going to help you."
"I know a safe place. Somewhere you can be away from everyone," he said sternly. "Somewhere you can learn to live with your abilities in peace."
Her abilities. Claire grimaced slightly, feeling hard-pressed to see them as such even when she didn't even know their full extent. The realization dawned on her that they were going to take her away. Months ago, she had just been a nurse working a tiring job at the bottom of the totem pole, trying to make ends meet. Now, she was going to be whisked off to some mystery location, to learn to manage her abilities. It was wrong, her mind screamed out, but it was irreversible. There was no going back, only forward.
"Alright," she said feebly, her voice quavering. "I'll... I'll go."
A/N
I know, it has been a very, very long time since my last update, but hopefully we can look at this like a break like the ones you have between seasons of a television show! Life has been crazy. As some of you might know, I'm expecting my first baby and the first trimester was super hard to juggle between work, school, and you know... growing a person. My energy is slowly returning, but I won't make any promises about update frequency just yet. But in the meantime, I really wanted to have something new for all of you guys before Thanksgiving, even if it was a short chapter. We're getting into a phase of the story, and I have a lot of fun things planned! Thank you for all of your support and your messages of concern during my disappearance. In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I am incredibly thankful for all of you! It's good to be back! Until next time, cheers!