It's Cool - I know you love me without needing to tell me.
But alas, this is also the last one for a while.
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Natstar

SHATTER ME

Chapter 24

Both Sirius and Hermione were surprised when Harry asked if Ginny could join them in Hermione's memories. "Hermione needs someone that is not male to confide this with and she and Ginny have become really close. It just makes sense." Harry said; flushing slightly as all had stared at him. He flushed even more when Hermione hugged him close.

"Harry you are like the little brother I wish I had." She whispered to him before letting go. Ginny took Hermione's hands, "Only if you are sure."

Hermione gave Ginny a watery smile and nodded, "I am. Thank you Gin"

"Hermione, you do so much for the rest of us. The least we can do is support you when you need it." Ginny said, "Besides I have also been dying for you to show me the ring!"

Hermione laughed and the girls disappeared into Hermione's room to show her the ring Sirius gave her. Sirius and Harry were left standing in awkward silence as they heard Ginny squeal in delight. Sirius chuckled.

"It's almost identical to when James and Lily announced their engagement. Lily and her best friend disappeared to the bedroom as we patted James on the back and drank his best liquor."

"Well…" Harry grinned at Sirius and pulled out a bottle of Firewhiskey from his pocket. Sirius burst out laughing, "You are your father's son Harry."

Summoning two glasses Sirius poured them both a generous dose and handed one to Harry. "To new beginnings" Sirius toasted. They took a sip and sat down.

"So, have you asked out Ginny yet?" Sirius looked over his glass at Harry, who was now coughing and wheezing his second sip. Harry was saved by the girls as they emerged. Hermione's face was solemn.

"Shall we?" She didn't wait for them to answer as she moved through the room to the exit, heading towards Professor Dumbledore's study.

VVVVV

"Are you sure Miss Granger?" Professor Dumbledore asked, looking at her with concern over his half-moon glasses. The Pensieve floated between them. Harry, Sirius and Ginny stood on either side as they waited for Hermione to nod once more. She looked down at the small vial in her hand weighing it, watching the silvery substance move within the container on its own. Popping the cork off, she poured the substance into the Pensieve. Hermione pocketed the vial and drew her wand, drawing another memory into the basin.

"What did you add?" Sirius asked as she pulled a second from her mind and added it to the Pensieve. She looked at Sirius, sadness and anger flashed briefly across her face.

"The rest" She answered, plunging her face into the Pensieve, not waiting for the others as she felt herself fall into the depths of her memories. Ginny shrugged and followed stepping forwards and copying Hermione's actions.

"What did she mean by the rest?" Harry asked as he stepped towards the Pensieve. Sirius stood opposite, shrugged at his Godson, "I guess we'll find out."

Harry nodded the plunged his face into the Pensieve disappearing before as Sirius muttered "But I suspect I don't think I will like what it will be" bending forwards, leaving Albus behind to await their return.

They landed in a place all four of them knew too well: The Department of Mysteries. They stood atop of the gallery that surrounded a large stone arch in the centre of the room. The memory filled in the details as people came to life around them with spells flying everywhere. They watched in silence as the battle turned as Dumbledore entered followed closely by Hermione, taking out two Death Eaters on her own despite clutching the wound at her chest.

"How on earth did we even survive that night?" Ginny asked staring in shock as Harry and Neville tried to hold their own against the odds. Sirius chuckled bitterly, "As Minnie puts it 'Sheer dumb luck'"

They looked on as the memory of Hermione moved around the outside of the gallery to get behind Bellatrix who was focused on duelling with the memory of Sirius. The memory of Hermione raised her wand and chanted a spell switching herself with Sirius. They saw as Sirius appeared on the higher ground and Hermione just missing a spell that would have hit Sirius. They looked on as her footing slipped and she fell into the whispering veil disappearing from view. The world around them changed, turning grey.

"What's happening?" Ginny asked, panicking slightly as she was the only one that had never ventured into a memory like this before, despite having dealt with Tom Riddle's diary. Hermione reached and took her hand squeezing it reassuringly.

"This is my memory. This is where I went." She looked into the ever changing greyness as she let go of Ginny. "The space between time. Some call it Limbo. Others believe this is hell." Her voice was hollow as she looked at her younger self drift in the greyness.

"I thought you went back in time?" Harry asked. Hermione smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Harry, this IS time. Listen" She pointed out into the grey. There was nothing at first except the swirling greyness that surrounded them. Then the grey seemed to change and the faintest of whispering seemed to tickle their ears. The longer that they listened the more that they strained to try and distinguish the noise. Harry and Ginny both jumped slightly as Hermione spoke again.

"Time is all around us. It doesn't run in one big line stamping out markers for all the points of History," She waved her hand out at the grey again. "Time is continuous. And not. It's looping, repeating and moving, dying and renewing. It is stopped, paused and it is rewinding and continuing forwards. All together. All at once and not at all. Time is endless and an instant. I understood it all in the moment I returned to the present."

All three of them stared at her, none quite noticing the changes in the grey as it darkened and deepening until the muted colours solidified around them to a room.

"Hold on. This is Sirius's bedroom. At Grimmauld Place." Harry said surprised. "Wow Sirius you were spoiled!" Ginny said looking at all the wizard toys displayed around the room.

"Not as spoiled as you may think." Sirius said quietly taking in the room with disdain. The whispering grew louder around them and watched the curtains begin to flap as the memory of Hermione was tossed out and meet a very frightened five year old Sirius Black.

The memory changed and daylight streamed in through the window and the memory of Hermione stumbling into the room to see two frightened little boys that had been beaten viciously. Hermione healed their cuts and bruises and their hearts as she gave them the only thing she could, love and tenderness with a story and reassurance that not everything was bad.

The memories moved forwards as they watched Sirius a little older this time in Diagon Alley the four of them looked through the window of the sewing shop as Hermione untangled herself from a rack of clothes to find Sirius grinning at her.

"Sirius, is that an eleven year old you checking out Hermione?" Ginny asked. Sirius shrugged, "What can I say. Ever since I met her that night in my room I was always enamoured by her. She showed me that there was magic that didn't hurt or frighten me or my brother."

He took her hand kissing it tenderly. Harry's face flushed, still embarrassed at seeing their open affection and watched as the memory of them played push/pull down the street to shop for Sirius's things.

"That day was the first time that I looked forwards to going to Hogwarts. And it was also the day that no matter what I would pick Gryffindor house." He said watching as the younger version of himself was shoved towards Ollivander's. They looked on as the memory Hermione dashed across the street to the Owl Post store.

"Her visits were like diamonds amongst coal. These moments of my life were what I focused on remembering of my childhood, especially as I grew older." Sirius looked on sadly as the younger version of him pushed her away, telling her to leave before his mother returned.

As the memory faded back into the grey, Ginny spoke up, "I must say, the portrait of your mother didn't do her justice. She definitely looked scarier in real life"

Sirius laughed bitterly. "The painting could only yell profanity. The real one flung profanity and curses at you in equal measure."

The greyness changed and they were back in Hogwarts following them through the castle for a midnight feast. This changed again and all watched as chaos descended in the halls with everyone getting liberally coated in paint, feathers, glitter, flour and slime.

"Wicked." Harry said grinning. Hermione snorted. "I don't think I completely got rid of the glitter until the first chance I was able to properly have a shower."

They followed the young Sirius and young Remus through Hogwarts coming into the Great Hall, joining a boy that Ginny almost thought was Harry.

"My dad!" Harry smiled seeing the young version of his dad talk with Sirius before his attentions were diverted to a red head. "Mum!" Harry stared at his mother as a teenager."

"They could be twins!" Ginny looked between Harry and James, noting the only real difference was the colour of their eyes.

"Hermione had a lot of trouble distinguishing James from Harry that it became a running joke." Sirius looked sadly on to his best friend no longer with him. The darkness enveloped them once more and changed. Ginny squeaked in fear as a menacing growl reverberated around them.

She screamed when she saw the Werewolf move through the darkness, clinging to Harry. The scene changed swiftly and found themselves in the boys dormitory in Gryffindor tower, with Hermione surrounded by four boys, getting to know them. They watched as she comforted Remus, and promised all of them their secret was safe.

"Hold on. That was how you were named as the marauders?" Harry said in surprise. Watching as the group wrote names and had Hermione pick them.

"I was never able to quite figure that out. Things that are fixed in time seem to make it certain that particular events will play out regardless. Yet at that moment I was petrified that by me picking their nicknames, I would be changing history." Hermione mused, "It makes me wonder whether going back in time will actually change events or play them out another way to reach the same outcome."

None of them had a chance to reply as the memory shifted to the horrific scene before them as Hermione worked frantically to save Sirius's life, as he bled onto the rug. They saw her as she struggled to control her emotions as she used every spell she knew to help heal the wounds, and struggle under his weight as she helped to get him away from his home, with the help of his brother.

Harry watched as James and Remus came up and hugged Hermione as his grandparents, James' parents took over Hermione's efforts. The scene moved to Harry's grandparents' house with Hermione asleep between James and Remus; waking up to find a freshly healed Sirius and their reunion.

Grey came and went and they were back in Hogwarts watching on as Sirius got pranked for his birthday and then caught by McGonagall. Ginny however was staring at the younger version of Sirius with appraising eyes.

"Now I see why you were such a – wait is Professor McGonagall blushing? Did she just check you out?" Ginny exclaimed.

"Merlins beard! My dad did strut!" Harry watched the group interacting and James strut across the common room, hair still damp. Sirius put a hand on Harry's shoulder reassuringly. "Don't worry he did grow out of it. Especially after marrying your mother"

The memories shifted again to the motorcycle ride to James's parents' house again, this time with a party and everyone enjoying being teenagers.

"Who is the blonde?" Ginny asked, watching the witch pull a reluctant Hermione up to dance with Lily.

"Marlene McKinnon. She was Lily's best friend in Hogwarts." Hermione answered sadly. "Gods I miss her."

A single tear fell as the memories shifted again and they watched the memory of Hermione tumble from a large wardrobe, the whispering wind billowing a wedding veil. They looked on silently as they saw through Hermione's eyes Lily get ready for her wedding day. How Hermione became her second bridesmaid after hearing her sister's refusal to come.

Harry saw the heartbroken look on his mother's face. It added onto the large list of reasons why he hated his Aunt and Uncle. Ginny sighed as they saw Lily come from behind the screen in her wedding gown. Harry didn't know how happy a person could be until he saw his father look at his bride to be for the first time. The love in each of their eyes was clear to see. He also noted that Sirius's eyes were on one of the bridesmaids and for that matter so was Remus's on Marlene's.

Harry looked further down the line of groomsmen to the last person that stood there. He had avoided looking at Peter. He didn't want to like the person, but in that moment saw a look of loathing and something else as well that he couldn't quite work out directed at all the women. Before he could consider it further, the scene changed and they watched the celebrations that night, as everyone danced.

"Whoa. Hermione I did not know you could dance like that!" Ginny stared at the pair, blushing slightly. Harry's own face was flaming but could not look away as they moved together in sync.

"You two really were always meant for each other." He commented.

"I always thought so." Sirius said looking at his Hermione with a smile. Hermione gave him a brief smile in return which faded as the memory did, moving through the next memories, moving Lily and James in to their new home, seeing Lily enormously pregnant. Ginny had to turn away as well at the sandwich. Yet the memories kept moving forwards with Hermione holding baby Harry dressed as a fairy, Confronting Peter and obliviating him. Harry watched on in shock.

"Why didn't you say anything then Hermione?" He asked her. Hermione gave him a sad look, "How could I? I was so frightened of changing anything. Me being in these moments was doing enough damage. I did what I could to protect the future. The one I came from."

"You cannot blame Hermione's actions, Harry." Sirius said, as the memory of Hermione confronting the three death eaters and taking them on almost entirely on her own. "Remus and I did, but not until after we truly saw what the experiences were doing to her, keep watching, you will understand."

The memory moved on and Sirius and Hermione babysat a cheeky baby Harry who called his godfather Pad-Pad, coated both of them in more baby food than they fed him and Hermione singing him a lullaby to sleep. The lullaby pulled at Harry's own memories.

"You had such a beautiful beginning Harry. Everyone that met you loved you. Your mum made me teach her the lullaby. Sirius and Lily would sing it to you so you would sleep." Hermione answered the unspoken question in his eyes.

The memories became sadder, Remus and Sirius mourning the death of Marlene. Remus blaming Hermione. Hermione waking up in St Mungo's Remus wanting to punish her. Remus helping her recover. Attending Lily and James's funeral. Listening to the eulogy Remus gave.

Hermione being swept away into the grey and appearing in the cell with Sirius. The lullaby echoing through the prison. Sirius turned away from the scene still unable to see himself as he was. Harry and Ginny stared in horror at what Sirius had to endure, innocent in a prison that made you only recall the worst times of your life. Including the guilt of his best friend and his best friends wife's death.

The memory changed and Sirius saved Hermione from drowning. Hermione's despondency now evident as she helped to hide him. The memories marched ever forwards as they watched Hermione break down before Remus. Neither Ginny nor Harry were able to speak as the memory of Hermione struggled to retain her sanity. Sirius was watching his Hermione and whispered to her, "You don't have to stay Princess."

Hermione shook her head, "No, I need to do this." She said as she drew apart from him and the others to watch it all. The memory went back to the grey and it took them a while to realise that it was a storm and they were falling through the clouds as thunder and lightning erupted around them. Ginny clutched Harry, gasping and pointing at the solitary figure falling. Sirius swooping in with Buckbeak catching Hermione and dropping towards the small speck of land.

They watched as both Hermione and Sirius healed their own mental and emotional wounds on the island. Both finding some happiness. Moonlight and waves changed to snow drifts and a blizzard. Ginny snorted as she watched Hermione pretend to be like Lavender. Even Harry who was trying hard not to stare at how little Hermione was wearing gave a small smile. He glanced at the real Hermione stunned to see a burning hatred at the men intruding into Remus's home. Harry wasn't the only one to see it. Sirius had been watching Hermione as the memories moved closer to the recent past and her demeanour grew distant from the others.

The memory leapt ahead again to Hermione finally telling Sirius the truth about what she did to Peter all those years ago and his rejection to even hear her out. Hermione's second breakdown, and pancakes in the kitchen. They watched as Hermione, in a beautiful red ball gown; danced her last dance in the past with Sirius. Sirius bending onto his knee even as she faded into the grey. They watched and listened as the grey swept around Hermione, around them. It no longer seemed gentle, instead buffeting her every way. Then it all stopped. Ginny, Harry, Hermione and Sirius were back standing on the top of the gallery in the Department of Mysteries. Only Ginny's gasp could be heard as she saw high above them as Hermione plummeted to the earth, unable to have time to save herself. All cringed at the crunching sound of her body landing beside the Archway where the veil still blew gently towards her, as if calling to her.

The memory went dark and then came back, this time there was someone standing over her. Bending forwards and rolling her body, they saw the surprise as the stranger realised that Hermione was still alive.

Blackness returned, and before the memory grew clear all heard the screams of agony. Ginny whimpered against Harry as they all watched the men torturing and further breaking her body trying to break her mind. The memory went black again as Hermione's screams stopped as she slumped forwards on the bench they strapped her to.

They felt the pull as the memory sequences ended and came out of the memory. Hermione stood apart from them with cold fury in her eyes. She looked at Sirius, "Now you know it all." Her voice was soft, yet the air seemed to crackle around her. No one stopped her as she pivoted and strode from the room with a dancer's grace.

Ginny didn't realise that she was crying until a sob bubbled forwards. Harry also shaken, helped her to a seat letting her cry against his shoulder. Dumbledore moved around his desk conjuring a handkerchief for her and offered them some chocolate frogs. Sirius however continued to stare at the Pensieve, the images of Hermione being tortured replaying in his mind.

"I take it the memories she added were not what you were expecting?" Dumbledore asked softly. Sirius looked up at the headmaster, his expression murderous.

"She showed us what happened when she came out. She did that bastard a kindness in only wiping his mind." He growled.

"You didn't know that had happened?" Harry asked, frowning. Sirius shook his head.

"I suspected something had happened, but not to that extent." Sirius answered. He was now pacing, the only way he could let his anger out.

"Perhaps Mr Potter, you might escort Miss Weasley back to your common room. I trust you both will be considerate in the trust Miss Granger gave you both to witness those memories?" Professor Dumbledore asked the two students. They nodded and Harry led Ginny out, giving Sirius a backwards glance as he left.

When they had gone Albus tapped the Pensieve with his wand. Sirius watched as the liquid in the Pensieve bubbled up replaying the last memories. The Headmaster's office filled with the sounds of Hermione's terrified and tortured screams. The memory faded with her voice still ringing in her mind.

"I think perhaps you should go and find Miss Granger, I will have Poppy send a calming draught just in case." Albus said quietly. "I will return her memories when she is ready."

Sirius nodded and stalked out of the office, her wellbeing his bigger concern than his revenge on all the bastards that hurt her. He took his time to search for her, knowing that his anger would not help him help her. He had a suspicion on where she went, and it helped that he could follow her unique honey and vanilla scent as Padfoot.

She was walking around the lake, with her arms wrapped tightly around her. She skirted away from him slightly as he fell into step with her.

"They broke me. Enough to see me when I was drowning in the ocean" She said softly.

"It's why it is always an ocean in my nightmares. They became monsters in the water. I let them find the grey in between then shattered it. Shattered me." She stopped walking and stared out at the lake, ripples followed as the giant squid seemed to follow them raising its tentacle out of the water to wave at them.

"Do you- do you think what I did to him was too much?" She asked. Sirius heard the fear in the question. He had wondered how much it had affected her, yet it seemed that in the moment of rage that she would be ruthless. In the moments between she would beat herself up about it. But he had also seen what she went through.

"No, sweetheart I don't. I think he deserved more than your mercy." Sirius watched as she considered and weighed his answer.

"He had a family. His eldest is in first year. A Hufflepuff"

"Princess, you had a family and it did not stop them one bit at what they did to you." He growled. The sharpness in his voice made her turn and look at him. Her crease in her brow, still considering, "I suppose."

"At the time I felt justified. What he did to me, I didn't want him to do that to anyone else. But then I think about his family and unless I decide to undo what I did, that little Hufflepuff boy and his sister will lose their father." She moved forwards to a large stump by the shore. Sirius caught her arm and pulled her to sit. She stiffened briefly in his arms before relaxing against him.

"He chose to do what he did. Believe me Princess, he deserves worse." Sirius held her, almost afraid to let her go.

"Does he?" Her voice whispered against him. "Did Peter when I obliviated all his memories of me from him?"

Sirius took a breath to answer but Hermione hadn't finished. She pulled away from him to look him in the eye, "Everyone in some way has become a victim Sirius. I- I don't want that to happen to our child."

"Sweetheart, I will not let that happen. Our baby will know his Dadda and his Mother." He leaned forwards kissing her forehead.

"Him?" Hermione asked; a small smile blossomed on her face. One of the first genuine smiles since before they went back through the memories. "What makes you think it will be a boy Mr Black?"

Sirius grinned, running a hand across her stomach, drawing her closer into his embrace, "Well Miss Granger, if you think it will be a girl we can put a wager on it."

Hermione's brow rose, her cheeks still dimpled in amusement. "And when I win?"

Sirius kissed her cheek and whispered against her ear, "You can pick her name. And if it is a boy, we are calling him Gary."

"Gary?" Hermione exclaimed, pulling away to stare at Sirius in disbelief. "We are NOT calling our child Gary!"

"What is wrong with Gary?" Sirius asked, still grinning.

"It's – it's an old man's name." Hermione countered weakly. This time Sirius's brow rose, still smirking, "Hermione, your father's name was Gary."

Hermione stood up abruptly, "Precisely!" She turned and folded her arms, "Besides, it will not happen."

Sirius leaned back, "Why? You seem very sure it will be a girl."

Hermione's eyes narrowed, "Even if it's a boy, no child of mine will be called Gary. Perhaps as a middle name, but definitely not as their first name!"

Sirius stood and drew her close again, "Ah Princess, you take all the fun out of it all."

Hermione snickered, "No I haven't. We still haven't told Harry or Remus that they are going to be uncles."

"You can tell Harry. I got dibs on telling Moony. Or I should say Uncle Moony." Sirius grinned.

My beta XX

Immy's Note:

Dun, Dun, Dun.. Wasn't that a great chappy? I'm so excited to read and edit the next ones. Speaking of editing Dear Readers, please forgive me for any mistakes I've left. I'm a massive klutz and fell down in heels { go me } so I'm on these totally fun { sarcasm } pain meds that make me feel a little floaty and loopy { dw ima be fine :) }
Am I the only one who thinks Gary Granger Black rolls off the tongue nicely? Gary Black sounds nice too, but I can't imagine H taking the Black name and giving hers up. But we shall see. Anyhoo, I agree with H, Gary would be cute as a middle name but possibly not as a first.