A/N : Hello everybody! I hope you liked the first chapter of my story! I loved the fast and heartfelt response! I'll try to upload a chapter every week...
Answer to the comments:
• James Birdsong: Thank you! I hope you like this chapter as well!
•wandamarie: I hope you say that because you are positively surprised, haha... Either way, thanks for reviewing!
Let me know what you think of this chapter too...
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone of those characters, nor do I make any profit from this story.
P.S. English is not my native language so, if you spot any grammatical, syntax or any other mistake, don't hesitate to correct me!
On with the chapter!!!
Harry woke up at 6:00 the next day, he took a shower , he decided not to shave, rather liking his scruffy look. He then put on his tracking pants and a plain white t-shirt and moved to the kitchen.
Snape was already there sitting, reading his newspaper, with a mug of black coffee in front of him.
"Nutrition Potion. Protein shake." He passed a vial of potion to Harry and a big glass of his shake. Harry drank the potion and then his shake.
"Finished?" Snape inquired.
"Yes sir." Harry replied, as politely as he could, looking Snape in the eyes.
Only then did Harry notice what the man was wearing and he almost spilled the milk from his mouth! Snape was in a white T-shirt, like him and grey pair of tracking pants with black shoes. He coughed, in a desperate way not to choke and then got up and followed the Professor, who had already began to walk out of his quarters.
They walked to the lake, Snape in his usual pace and Harry trying to catch up, cursing the man from the inside, because of his quick pace.
"You do workouts at Quidditch don't you? Before you play I mean." Snape's brown shot up, to accompany his sarcastic tone.
"Only some running. Nothing more." Snape made a disapproving sound at that and Harry felt his anger rising.
"We will start with some running. Build up your endurance. How much can you run Potter?"
" Ehm... I don't really know sir... I can certainly ran about four to five Quidditch courts. I think that's about 800 yards ( 4 km)."
"Good. If you are ready then..."
Harry took his place next to the Potions Master as they began running around the lake. The sun had risen, its reflection hitting the lake, creating a majestic image around them. Harry breathed in the oxygen, savoring its smell of pine and dump grass.
When Snape noticed that Harry was struggling to keep up with him, he would lower his pace, but always making a remark. "Not even a capable runner, are you Potter?" He would sneer.
By the time they were finished, Harry was completely out of breath. He leaned down, hands on his knees for support, his heart pounding. Snape hadn't even a small bid of sweat!
He gave Harry a chance to catch up his breath, and when he was sure the boy wouldn't faint, they went back to the castle, to eat a full breakfast.
"Potions are very unique, Potter. You should know that, six years here. I am aware of you incompetence at them, but do try and pay attention, because they can take you out of situations of dire straits. We will start with the pain relieving potion. Instructions are on board." Snape waved his wand and the instruction appeared in his small and calligraphic handwriting.
He stood next to Harry and observed him. The boy seemed to struggle reading the board. Harry then, moved around the class and collected his ingredients, chopping and smashing some of them. It was hard to concentrate, having an old bat breathing down your neck, and he would frequently look up from his shoulder with an arched eyebrow at Snape.
"Tell me Potter, what do the instructions say? Or are you a complete dunderhead and decided to make your own potion?"
" 3/4 oz of valerian root, 1/2 oz of peppermint, 19 porcupine quills..."
"Stop right there Potter. It's 10 porcupine quills. Can't you read? You are that much of a dunderhead, aren't you?"
" I can read." Harry's anger was rising.
"Then why put 9 unnecessary quills? Because if you can read, as you claim, and even then, you put 9 more quills inside a very delicate potion, there must be another idiotic reason for your incompetence. Maybe, you are a Potions Master and know a different way to brew a Pain Relieving Potion...You think you are better than anyone don't you Potter?" Snape sneered, with a loud voice.
"Have you ever considered the fact, that I'm not a complete dunderhead? Or an idiot? Or a self centered bastard, who thinks is better than everyone?" Harry exclaimed, his voice boiling with rage.
"Watch your tone with me Potter..." Snape's voice was dangerously low. They looked each other in the eyes for almost a whole minute.
"I'm done trying to fight you, Snape. I have bigger things to worry about. Like the fact, that I might die in the hands of a maniac and if I don't manage to kill him before he kills me, the world will be doomed. I know what my father, Sirius —Harry almost winced at the name— and Remus have done to you and I'm sorry you had to get through it, but I'm not them. I'M NOT THEM. I was eleven years old when I walked into your classroom, I didn't even know you, and you immediately attacked me. I didn't even know my father then. I had been told that he was a drunk and a bastard. So excuse me SIR, but I can't fight with you any longer. I can't stand it."
Harry got up from his bench and slammed the door on his way out of the lab. Snape was left in there, his anger practically showing around him like a red aura. Damn Potter! He paced around the lab, furious, controversy building in the back of his mind.
If he went to Dumbledore, the old coot would most likely get angry and point out the significance of the war and that Potter was a kid who didn't have anything easy in his life, like he assumed. But then again, the boy was alone in the castle, roaming around and for all he knew, he could go outside unprotected. If Death Eaters were to capture the boy, Severus was much more afraid of Dumbledore's anger at him, than Voldemort's wrath if he were to find out he was a spy. He got out of the lab in a hurry. He had already lost valuable time.
"Point me Harry Potter" he performed the quick charm which guided him through the castle. Thank Merlin he hadn't gone outside. Seventh floor. The Room of Requirement. He knew the room all too well. He used to come here to escape from everyone and everything. He had shown it to Lilly too. They used to come and study in here. He was surprised to see Potter use it last year for his D.A. meetings. It was true that, to begin Dumbledore's Army, as a way to learn how to defend themselves, for what it was about to come, was a clever thing to do.
He paced thrice outside the room thinking " Show me Harry Potter" eventually the door appeared and he opened it.
He saw a room with practice dummies and Potter with his wand raised firing all kinds of spells at them.
"Potter, stop," he instructed in a rough voice
"Why should I listen to you?" Harry demanded as he continued to fire spells at the dummy.
"Lower your wand now, Potter. We have to talk."
Harry turned around and faced the man, his eyes full of hurt and anger.
"I don't have anything else to say. And frankly, I don't want to listen to you yell at me for my behavior. I'm sick of this!" He said full in disappointment and what seemed like betrayal. Severus wasn't sure.
"Watch your tone..." Snape growled. "Do you think I like what is going on, Potter? Do you think I enjoy being stuck here, on my summer vocation, with you to watch over? I don't. But I'm obliged to, because I owe my life to Dumbledore and because I want to see this war to be over. So, lower your wand at once, and let me put in your head, whatever knowledge I have, that will help you win the battle."
Harry looked at him angered, but he lowered his wand.
"It is ten o' clock and the headmaster awaits you in an hour. We don't have time to brew a pain reliever potion, you will however brew it tomorrow in the time of Defense, since you have already wasted our time. Now, in the remaining of our time, I will try to teach you some new spells that are easy enough to master.
"The first one is a spell I invented. It is called Sectumsempra. It's a dark spell Potter. I warn you. Only use it in battle. What it does is, it creates cuts all around a person's body, until he bleeds to death. Let me demonstrate... Sectumsempra!" He fired at the dummy who started getting cut by invisible knives.
Harry understood why it was such a dark spell. It seemed like a very painful death for someone to have but if he ever needed it, he wouldn't be afraid to use it.
They continued their lesson for half an hour and then Snape and Harry walked to the dungeons. Snape instructed Harry to grab a fruit to eat before going to Dumbledore's office.
"What spells did you cover with the D.A.?" Snape inquired, in a softer than before tone.
"We did a lot... Stunning spells, patronus charm, shield charm, counter spells, reductor, body bind..."
"You almost covered the whole sixth and fifth year. Which means I'll have to teach you more advanced spells. We will work with non-verbal spells. Try to master those. And then build your defensive skill."
Harry nodded. He had wanted for a while to learn non verbal spells.
"Don't just stand there Potter, you are keeping the Headmaster waiting!" Snape dismissed him and Harry left in a hurry.
" Chocolate Cauldrons" Harry said the password and the gargoyle moved aside. He climbed up the stairs, two at a time and knocked at the Headmaster's door.
"Come in, Harry." The man said from inside.
"Hello sir." Harry smiled at the man.
"How is your day going?"
"Very good sir. Thank you for asking. How about yours?"
"Bureaucracy, Harry... A lot of it. But that is not the reason you are here. Do sit down. Lemon drop?"
"No thank you."
"How about a cup of tea?"
"Thank you sir." Harry accepted the cup of tea, that appeared, levitating in front of him, and took a sip.
"How is your stay so far?"
"It's more pleasant than the Dursleys, sir." the teen offered and Dumbledore tried not to comment, knowing that this was a comment meant for him.
"How do you feel Harry? You've been through a lot, this past few months, I'd love for you to be comfortable to discuss any of your troubles with me, or Minerva or even Severus." Dumbledore, very delicately, tried to avoid addressing Sirius' death right away, but Harry understood completely were this was going.
"I'm not really ready sir. I have to understand a few things on my own, first. Face reality." He was really trying to contain himself. Sirius' passing was a very weak spot of his, and this conversation felt like pouring salt over a raw wound.
Dumbledore noticing that, changed subtly the topic of their conversation.
"Now Harry, to the matters at hand... Tell me,have you ever wondered how Lord Voldemort is alive, after a killing curse rebounded at him, after you took his spirit out of Quirell, after you basically stabbed him with a basilisk tooth? Why he was reborn, full in flesh this time, at your fourth year?"
"I thought that all this time he was kept in a spiritual state with the help of unicorn blood."
"Let me tell you something, Harry. There is no wizard who would survive the killing curse and become a spirit. You were protected by the strongest shield, your mother's love. Voldemort never knew love and yet again he wasn't killed by the killing curse. It is true that he drank unicorn blood, but that alone is not enough to preserve a dying man. Unicorn blood, a very deep commitment for someone's magic, brings you youthfulness, prosperity in mind and health, but it cannot bring the dead back, and it certainly cannot provide you with a whole new body.
"The key lies in something bigger. Bigger and terrible, Harry. So terrible, that not a single wizard in the whole wizarding history has ever done it. Horcruxes."
"Horcruxes?" Harry was confused now.
"Yes. — Dumbledore continued, — A horcrux is essentially an object that protects a piece of your soul and allows you a second chance at living, should something, let's just say, happen to you, like being killed, even with the Avada Kedavra. I am guessing you are wondering why hasn't everyone created a horcrux and live through immortality. Because Harry, to create a horcrux you have to commit the supreme evil act. Murder. Then, with a ritual of the most dark spells, you split your soul and put it in the object you wish. But that process, damages your soul, it taints it, it tampers with it, in a way that eventually your appearance changes too. That is the reason Tom, from a very handsome young man, as you saw in your second year, has become an alien like monster."
"So Voldemort has created a horcrux?" Harry felt disgusted at the thought of willingly killing a person and then a part of your soul to become immortal. It was no mistake that Harry called him a maniac.
"That is what I'm worried about. I think that Lord Voldemort has not only created one, but at least seven horcruxes. The first one, you destroyed."
"The diary!" Harry exclaimed, realization hitting him.
"Well done Harry! When you brought it to me that day in your second year, I thought it was an object infused with dark magic, but that was it. Last year, when I was away, I started collecting memories, from various people, that knew the younger Tom Marvolo Riddle. Relatives, kids at the orphanage he grew up, and then the thought occured to me. It was obvious then, why Voldemort had managed to survive."
"So in order to kill him, we have to find and destroy the horcruxes. And how can we find out where they are?"
"That is where I need both yours and Severus' help. I have an assumption as to from where Tom learned about the horcruxes. You see, before Professor Snape, the potion's teacher position, was occupied by Horace Slaughorn. He retired after the war ended. Horace is a collector, of some shorts. He likes to make acquaintance with famous people, people who are worth something in the magical community. I have already written to him, and asked him to attend Hogwarts as the Potions Professor again. He hasn't responded and I don't think he will. But if you come with me, I'm sure he could easily be persuaded. Horace holds important information Harry. Only with his memories will we be sure of the certain number of horcruxes that exist. He won't give those memories willingly. I have tried and he sent me a vial of altered memories. He is a man of pride and is terribly sorry and ashamed to have helped Riddle with this, even unknowingly.
As for Severus, I think that maybe, by proving himself worthy, and getting back in the inner circle of Death Eaters, as the right hand of Voldemort, Tom will confide in him, when he finds out that his horcruxes are being damaged or destroyed."
"And how can we destroy them sir?"
"Well one way is obvious. Can you think of it?"
After several moments of concentrated thinking, Harry answered cautiously;
"The basilisk venom."
"That is correct. Also, the sword of Gryffindor that as we speak is in this office. The sword, made by the goblins, has the ability to absorb any form of substance or magic that will make it stronger. As a result, when you killed the basilisk with it, it absorbed its venomous powers. I think that there are other ways too, but we can't test them until we have a real horcrux in our hands."
"And we will go track them, won't we sir?"
"Of course we will Harry! But firstly, we have to prepare. Learn about Voldemort through the memories I have collected. Only then, we will find out where they are and how to destroy them."
Harry didn't need to put two and two together. He knew that the thought he had just made, had already occurred to Dumbledore.
"Am I a horcrux sir?" He asked bluntly.
He saw the sadness penetrate the man's eyes as their twinkle became lost.
"It is what I'm afraid of Harry. It would explain your connection with Voldemort, your ability to talk Parseltongue. We will cross that bridge when we get to it, though. Until then, we will fight with all our might and we will all be here to be of assistance to you."
"Thank you..." Harry said his voice flat. He didn't know what to really say. He deeply down knew he was a horcrux. Dumbledore just didn't want to acknowledge it.
The prophecy said that neither can live while the other one survived. Yet, if he was a horcrux, he was the one who would have to die, wasn't he? And if he died, then who would take down Voldemort?
He was meant to die. The thought played again in his head.Suddenly it was like Harry had gained all the tranquility Dumbledore had lost. He wouldn't have to worry about surviving, he finally had his wish completed, to be unburdened of his future responsibilities as the boy who lived.
A small smile formed in his lips. How ironic was it? Now that he had finally a home, with people who cared about him, he wouldn't have the chance to feel how a real family was. Because that is how he saw Dumbledore, as his grandfather, and that is how Dumbledore saw him too, as his grandson.
Harry didn't hear the man standing up and was almost surprised when a gentle hand was put in his shoulder. He looked up to see the headmaster, with eyes glistening with tears.
"Listen to me, Harry. Listen carefully. I won't let anything happen to you. We will find a way out of this. We don't even know if it is true. It is after all just a theory. Do you hear me?"
"Yes sir..."
"I think you of all people have earned the right to call me Albus..."
Harry looked up at him surprised.
"Thank you... Albus..." it sounded a bit strange when he first said it out loud.
Dumbledore ruffled his hair a bit.
"Needless to say, that everything we said here today, mustn't be told to anyone except me,Minerva and Severus, not even your friends Harry. Can you give me your word?"
"I won't tell anyone sir."
"Thank you m'boy... Now,why don't we take a walk until lunch Harry? It is beautiful outside, and I rather have a long time since I walked to the grounds."
"Sure." Harry really wanted a walk outside right now.
He followed Albus on the grounds, neither of them saying anything, both lost in their thoughts. They had almost arrived by the lake when Albus spoke.
"Let me tell you a story Harry. I had a pair of very good and dear friends. They had a baby very early in their age. I would visit the small one almost every day, after Hogwarts, along with Minerva,to relieve my every day stress. I would take the tiny and beautiful baby in my arms, tell him bedtime stories, lull him into sleep. Sometimes, when he became insufferable, his parents would bring him to me to calm down, and let me tell you that my beard did the trick every time...I loved being grandpa Al and I'll cherish these memories for ever. I think you know how the story ends."
"I didn't know that sir..." a bitter sweet smile crossed Harry's face. He always tried to imagine the happy days of his life. The days that he wasn't hurting inside. He had tried to imagine Sirius playing with him, Remus throwing him up in the air and him giggling, his mom cuddling him close to her and his dad who would always run around with him... It was good to know that he was loved, that the good days were as he had imagined. It relieves some of his burden, some of his sadness.
"Of course you wouldn't. Very few people know. I thought that taking a healthy distance, away from you, and by being your Headmaster and nothing more, it would benefit you. I now know how idiotic I was. You needed to be loved and cherished and I could have provided you with both but I just gave you to the Dursley's. And that is the biggest mistake of my life. I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am Harry."
"You don't have to sir... I understand...," and part of him really did understand.
They continued to walk in silence, not awkward silence though, until Albus took out his pocket watch.
"Oh my! Look at the time! I think it is time to go and eat our lunch! I'm sure you are famished m' boy! I for once, have been dreaming about some mashed potatoes and roast beef..." Albus chuckled a bit.
"Before we lose the privilege of privacy, I want to tell you something Harry. Take it as an advice if you'd like...You have a lot in common with Severus, Harry, even if it doesn't seem so obvious. Severus had as a troubling childhood as you had. And now with the war and his duties as a spy, he endangers his life everyday. I'm not trying to make excuses for the way he has been treating you. I have reprimanded him a good amount of times for his behavior against you. You Harry, on the other hand, I think you can really bring the change in the lives of the both of you. You are kind hearted and sensitive. A lot like your mother was." Albus smiled at the thought of Lily. "You can find solace in one another m'boy, that will bring peace to both of you."
Harry understood what Dumbledore meant, and he was sure that if Snape was a decent human being, that would be the case. But Snape wasn't, and Harry didn't have the time, nor the patience to deal with his behavioral issues. He let Albus' words float in his head for a bit, but then stashed it in the back of his mind, moving forward.
"Would you tell me some more stories sometime Albus?"
"As many as you wish for Harry m'boy" Albus rested his hand on Harry's shoulder as they walked into the Great Hall together.
Harry had learned a great deal of new spells in the Healing session with Professor McGonagall and Madame Pomfrey. He found out that he was quite skilled at healing. Maybe if he got out of this war alive, and that was a big if at the moment, he would try his luck as a healer. Truth is, he was quite full of wars and dark wizards. He didn't know if he had the strength to keep chasing the bad his whole life.
He made his way to the dungeons quickly. He got in to the private quarters and was surprised to find Snape reading a book in his favorite armchair.
"Potter," the wizard acknowledged coldly.
"Good afternoon sir. I was just stopping by to eat something before we began... I'll be ready in five minutes." Harry's voice was clipped but he was trying his best to be polite.
"No rush. There is a bowl of fruits on the kitchen table. I'd rather you ate some of those rather than something else." Snape's tone was continuing to be apathetic and distanced.
"Yes sir." Harry went to the kitchen ate his snack and when he was finished, Snape guided him to his office, where he took Occlumency lessons last year too.
"We are going to start Occlumency from the beginning. Occlumency is an advanced technic of shielding your mind and thoughts from others. I gather you know as much from last year at least. Its opposite, it's Legilimence. To perform Occlumency, you have to empty your mind of emotions and thoughts clear it, like there isn't anything inside. Take a few breaths Potter and try to clear your mind... I'm going to cast the spell now, see if I can brake your walls. One, two, three, Legilimens!" Snape casted the spell as he looked Harry in the eyes.
Much to his surprise, Harry had managed to put on a kind of shield. A very weak one, Snape had penetrated his mind by tearing down a wall just as thin as a piece of paper. He got into Potter's thoughts and pieces of memories started showing up.
"You have a lot in common with Severus, Harry. Even if it doesn't seem so obvious. He had as a troubling childhood as you had. And now with the war and his spying duties he endangers his life everyday." He saw a bit of the conversation Potter had with Dumbledore before.
"Occlude Potter! Clear your thoughts!" He instructed strictly.
"Am I a horcrux sir?"
He saw Harry ask the Headmaster and Severus felt the sadness, defeat and something that seemed like relief that Potter had felt, when he uttered those words.
"If I ever catch you following Dudley again, you will die before you say freak boy!" Uncle Vernon raised his fist and hit him hard on the face. Harry fell down and the fat man kicked him hard on his ribs. Harry tried not to scream in the sudden bolt of pain. Vernon lifted him up and threw him on the wall.
"Lift up your shirt boy! Now!" He growled as he took his belt off and lifted it to hit Harry's back, sharply.
Harry wouldn't beg for him to stop, like any other child would. He didn't as much as try to protect himself. He lifted his shirt and Snape watched as the idiot of a muggle started hitting him in the back with his belt until blood showed up from the wounds.
Severus couldn't take it anymore. He felt sick. He pushed himself out of Harry's thoughts and sat on his stool. He rubbed the bridge of his nose, his eyes shut.
"When was this?" He asked in a low voice.
"At the beginning of the summer." Harry's voice was full of embarrassment.
"Does it happen often?"
"From as long as I remember."
Snape's expression took the shape of anger and sadness.
"If you had told anyone..."
"I didn't want to. Dumbledore had said that there were blood yards that protected me from Voldemort there. If I went anywhere else, I would put those around me in danger. I don't want that."
"So what? You endanger your own life and your well being? That is abuse Potter! Abuse! Those fucking muggles deserve to rot in Azkaban for what they have done to you. Anyone would have listened. Even myself." Severus said exasperated.
"It doesn't matter anymore, does it? I mean, I'm turning seventeen in a month. I don't have to go there anymore."
Severus stood and with fury in his eyes he moved quickly towards Harry. The boy ducked thinking Snape would hit him. Snape froze in place. Did the boy really think he was capable of hitting a student? Especially Harry Potter? Now that he thought well about it, with his unexplained rivalry against the boy, he had every right to think of him as a monster. He cleared his throat and moved behind Harry opening a cabinet filled with potions.
"I would never raise a hand on any of my students." He said in defeat.
Harry recognized the hurt in the man's voice and was taken aback.
"I... It is just a reflex... I'm sorry..."
"Don't ever apologize about those things Potter. They are out of your control. Let's go back to the quarters, see what I can do about those scars. I think that is enough for today."
Harry really felt exhausted and he would do anything to get those marked swats from his back, so he stood up and followed Snape to Harry's room. He lied down facing the bed and lifted his shirt. The view was truly horrific. Snape cringed at the sight of it, thinking of his own scars.
He ran a diagnostic spell on the boy before him.
"It seems that your magic has managed to heal properly your ribs. I'm going to put on a balm that will help with the scaring but because the scars are old, I don't know the extent of the healing the balm can achieve.It may sting a little at first." Snape described what he was doing so that Harry felt comfortable.
The light touch, almost thoughtful , of Snape's long fingers, as he put on the scarring balm, felt soothing and Harry's eyelids became heavy and eventually he let sleep take him away.
Snape noticed the shift of breathing in Harry. When he finished, he sighed heavily and with a flick of his wand he put Harry in his pajamas and out of his everyday clothing. He pulled his bedsheets to his waist, closed the light of the room and stood for a moment to observe the teen,almost man now. He knew that to start Occlumency they had to first take care of Harry's mental wounds. He slapped himself mentally. How could he have missed this? How could he be so cruel to a child that had the same childhood as he did, sometime. Severus Snape sighed and lied down to his bed with a restless sleep, as the nightmares of his own past made their appearance.